The Joker (Jared Leto) x Reader- “Trick or Threat?”
For Halloween, you and Jared like to borrow kids from your friends and go “Trick or Treat” with them. It’s been a tradition for a while but this year is a little bit different: your boyfriend decided to surprise you with something he knows you will love and he has no idea you have a little something for him also.
You rush down the stairs, eager to open the door: he probably forgot his keys again. Jared wasn’t home when you woke up and sent just a short text:
“Be back around 12pm,” with a heart emoji.
You open the door and freeze:
“Trick or threat?” the husky voice asks and you are stunned.
“Oh my God, Jared ! Why didn’t you tell me?! I would have been Harley!”
“Who the fuck is Jared, woman?!” he growls and you giggle. “Are you cheating on me?!” and J uses his cane to open the door wider and walks inside the house, groping you in the process.
You’ve been begging him to be The Joker for Halloween all year and he refused, saying it’s too exhausting.
“Baby, you really should have told me,” you approach and he looks around, snarling.
“Fancy house, you sure are sooo spoiled,” he ignores your complaint, stopping in the middle of the living room. Jared is wearing your favorite outfit from the movie: the black pants and white shirt from the club scene. You adore it because you think it makes his perfect butt stand out. You get on your toes and wrap your arms around his neck, frantically kissing him.
“Thank you,” you caress the green hair, smiling. “You know I have a kink for your Joker.”
“Watch the make-up, honey. They’ve been getting me ready since 6 this morning,” Jared suddenly emerges for a few moments.
“Oops, sorry,” you back out and he spanks you.
“I’m joking, Princess, Daddy likes it,” and he kisses you again while you can’t stop laughing. “Did you decide on a costume yet?”
“No, I keep on debating. Come on Jared, help me decide,” you jump off his arms, dragging him upstairs.
“Who the hell is this Jared?!” he gets pissed, in character again.
“Nobody you should be worried about, Mister J,” you play along, thrilled he did this for you: if this isn’t love, then you certainly don’t have a clue about it.
“Then why are you wearing this skimpy little nightgown, hm? Was he just here and you had fun with him? I’m gonna kill the bastard!” the tirade continues as you enter the master bedroom upstairs.
“Nooo, let’s not kill him,” you plead, pointing towards the three outfits on the bed. “We might need him later. Sit down and I will get dressed, then tell me what you think, ok?”
“Hurry up Doll, I don’t have all day!” the feistiness kicks in and it gives you a boost of energy.
“Of course, Mister J !” you grab the first item and run inside the walk- in closet to change. After you’re done, you step out and your sexy presence is greeted with a whistle of admiration and purring.
“So you like it…Daddy?” you wink, licking your lips.
“Don’t play with my emotions, you evil woman!” The Joker snarls, talking deep breaths.”I have a thing for nurses.”
“Oh, I know,” you zip down your top, tossing it in his lap.
“You’re wicked, “ he concludes, enjoying the striptease show.
“Oh, I know,” you repeat, now in just your bra and panties, grabbing the second outfit and try to get away but he snatches you and starts kissing every piece of skin he can get his lips on. “Bad Mister J,” you enjoy the pampering then manage to escape. “You told me to hurry up so be patient.”
“Patient?! What does that mean?!” J gets worked up, and you chuckle, getting dressed with the second outfit.
“Taaaa-daaaa,” you come out and he’s standing by the dresser.
“Wooow, Cat Woman! Look at those curves: I approve,” Jared grins and the silver teeth make you weak in the knees. There is something else standing out.
“Are those socks in there or are you just very happy to see me, baby?” you slowly come closer, staring at his crotch.
“They’re socks,” he adjusts his gold chains, grinning.
“Let me see,” you unbutton his pants, stick your hand in there and…pull out a pair of folded socks. You burst out laughing, amused.
“You’re so goofy,” the laughing continues as you pull out… a second pair of socks.
Jared tries not to laugh.
“That’s it, no more socks, the rest is natural,” he whispers in your ear. “Daddy saved it all for you, Pumpkin.”
“Are you taking advantage of the fact that I worship your Joker?” you jump in his arms, pecking his neck tattoo.
“Totally,” Jared shamelessly admits, heading towards the bed with the sweet burden of his existence.
“Are you sure your make-up and tattoos will be allright?” you double check because you are aware how long it takes to get him ready.
“I’m sure; they’re made to last for hours.”
“Don’t you want to see my 3rd outfit?”
“Nope, you can be Cat Woman,” he mumbles, placing you on the bed and has one more question while impatiently undressing you. “You still didn’t answer: trick or threat?” Jared purrs when you take off his shirt.
“Threat !” you moan when his hands go down your waist, cupping the side of your thighs.
“Mmmm, good girl,” that devilish smirk and the blue eyes make you lose it. “Let’s see…I’m gonna steal you from that Jared guy and have my way with his woman all over this house.”
“Sounds more like a treat,” you sigh and squeal when he bites your lip.
“Depends how you look at it Doll,” he grumbles and you dig your nails in his back. “So who do you want: Jared or The Joker, huh?” J licks your swollen lip, finding your fascination with his character irresistible.
“Both, “ you are fast to reply. “Can you take turns?” and you seem so excited and desperate there is no other choice.
“You’re such a perv, woman!” he snickers. “Exactly my type.”
The sentence makes you eagerly scratch his soft skin and the request is quick to follow:
“The Joker first, please.”
“No problem, Kitten,” and he cracks his neck, prompting a very enthusiastic scream from your part.
You already went to a couple of houses with Jake and Sarah into a new neighborhood. They are siblings: the little boy is 4 and the girl is 5, aka Spiderman and Cinderella. You ”borrowed” them from your friends for a couple of hours for some Halloween fun like you always do.
“Trick or treat?” the children inquire when the door they knocked at opens up.
“Treat!” and they are offered a bunch of candy they stash in their bags.
“Duuudddee!!” the guy exclaims when he sees Jared. “You look like The Joker; perfect cosplay, you really look like him!”
“Thank you,” he puckers his lips, amused.
“Hold on, my wife loves The Suicide Squad Joker. Honnneey!… Emma !! Hey! You gotta see this!”
“What is it?” you hear the woman’s voice and she is mesmerized as soon as she sees him.
“Jesus, you look like Mister J ! Can we take a picture?” she keeps on fangirling.
“Of course,” he agrees, the comment pleasing him.
“I thought Jared did an amazing job as The Joker! I am so obsessed with him. Sorry babe,” she addresses the husband when he rolls his eyes.
“Yeah, he wasn’t too bad,” Jared flashes his smile for the picture and now she wants another one with both of you.
“Not too bad?! He was phenomenal!!!” she keeps on praising and it makes you happy.
More walking around, more candy.
“Hey, Joker !!” a bunch of young guys dressed as Hobbits shout in your direction.“Where’s Harley, man?!”
“On vacation!” Jared yells back and it prompts laughter. “I have a bad Kitty with me instead!”
“Hot Kitty !!!” one of them yells and the others start howling.
You hold on to Jared’s hand, chuckling while he admonishes:
“Watch it !!! This is my Kitty, find your own!”
More laughter while they distance themselves from your small group. The kids are already ringing the doorbell from another house.
“Oh, “ the lady gasps in surprise when she notices you two waiting for the cute heroes to return by your side. “ You sure have great costumes! I have to admit that Leto butchered The Joker though,” she nods her head in denial, dropping sweets in the bags.
“Such a lack of talent,” Jared sarcastically admits. You want to say something but he squeezes your waist, signaling you not to.
“Indeed! I can’t believe how bad he was,” she goes on and you are getting irritated.
“The worst ever!” J agrees and you frown more.
“Why are you silent?” Jared intertwines his fingers with yours, awaiting on a reply.
“That lady annoyed me,” you sulk and he kisses your hand.
“I don’t care, I’m used to it. You like my Joker and that’s good enough,” Jared smiles but you know the negative comments hurt, especially after he worked so hard on the character. Contrary to what some people believe, he is human after all. “Speed up, those kids are far ahead.”
More walking, more chocolate, more candy…
“These stilettos are horrible,” the uncomfortable grimace on your face lets him know.“We’ve been walking around for two hours, I’m kind of done.”
“Just a couple more houses and then we can return our rental offsprings, ok?” J negotiates and you agree.
“Fine, but no more than that; I can barely walk.”
“Must be because you had too much fun having sex with two guys in the same time,” he snorts, teasing.
You lift your shoulders up, your cheeks burning under the mask:
“Can’t help it ! A girl has to have her fun.”
“Daddy will show you more fun after we get home, hm?” the hot breath on your neck gives you goosebumps.
“If you insist…” you pretend to be indifferent but the anticipation is making you impatient. “Can we hurry up?”
“Yeah, no problem,” he pinches your butt through the skin-tight latex suit while Jake and Sarah knock on another door.
“Get out of here: it’s my nemesis!” he turns his attention towards the young boy dressed as Batman coming out of the house to hand out candy with his dad. The 7 year old stares with his mouth open: he glances at Jared, then at The Joker action figure in his hand, then back to Jared, then back to his Joker action figure.
“Amazing cosplay, man!” his father laughs and Jared kneels by his son, entertained.
“Are you following me around, Mister Batsy?” he asks and Batman’s eyes get big. “We are actually friends, you know that, right?”
The boy can’t make a sound, just nods a yes, captivated.
“Here, a token of my friendship,” Jared takes one of his bracelets off, placing it around the kid’s wrist. “Shake hands?”
“U-hum,” the child agrees and your heart melts.
“Awwww,” you sigh, touched by the scene unfolding in front of your eyes.
“What do you say for the gift?” the dad has to intervene in order for his son to remember his manners.
“Thank you Mister Joker,” the shy voice speaks up and it makes you teary thinking about something you found out this morning you didn’t share with him yet.
“Trick or treat?” you step in the bedroom, wearing something he finds super seductive: two strings, held together by some kind of loop, then your breasts hardly covered by a few more strings and one small bow miraculously still in place. All pink.
“Holy shit, honey! Definitely a treat!” Jared decides on the spot, already in bed, fidgeting with his boxers.
“I was hoping you’re gonna say that,” you crawl in bed, holding something behind your back. “Here’s your treat,” you casually show him the positive pregnancy test and he fights with himself in order to contain the overwhelming happiness.
“This…this is the best treat I ever got in my entire life!” Jared confesses, not being able to maintain character; he still has the make-up and tattoos: they won’t be removed until tomorrow morning when he will drop by the studio.
You nervously blink and start crying, already worried about everything.
“Why are you crying, hm?” he caresses your face and you sniffle when your forehead gets kissed. “This is truly the best news. We don’t have to borrow kids for Halloween anymore, right? I mean, we still can so we can have a crowd,” he takes the pregnancy test out of your fingers, studying the red positive marking for a few seconds.“But…who’s the father?”
“What?!” you rub your eyes, waiting to hear about an over the top assumption for sure.
“Is it me or The Joker? You sleep with both, how do we know?”
This is enough to alleviate the tension and your body relaxes, a big smile appearing on your lips: Jared was counting on it since he noticed how anxious you were.
“I’m not sure…” you answer, watching him hide the test under his pillow.
“Stop fooling around, woman,” The Joker takes over, helping you get on top of him.“You know I’m possessive and jealous!”
“Extremely! Now give me my other treat!” he yanks your hands away so you can get really close to him. He notices the hesitation. “What now?”
“Can I…can I have my Jared?”
“Ughh, you’re killing me, Y/N,” Jared complains, his voice returning to normal.
“The Joker can wait for his turn, I still want him,” you pull on his bottom lip and he debates.
“For the record, this is harder than any movie script, do you understand?” your boyfriend really wants to emphasize his hardship.
“I think there’s something else that’s harder,” you taunt, grinding against him.
“I swear no socks are involved,” J laughs and you giggle, tracing his jaw line.
“Certainly not,” you kiss him and whisper in his ear: “Are you excited we’re going to be parents?”
Jared’s hands hold you so tight you can’t move.
“I’m so happy…” he whispers back and lifts your chin up so you can look at each other.“But are you asking me or The Joker?”
“Both,” you humor him.
“I’m happy and he feels cocky because he’s a stud and he got the confirmation he can impregnate everything that moves!” the speech makes you laugh like crazy as you slide off Jared, snuggling to his neck in the process.
“You’re such an idiot and I love you to death,” Jared hears as he pulls on all those strings you’ve been teasing him with since you showed up in the bedroom.
“Daddy will punish you for being so disrespectful!” The King of Gotham makes his presence known once more and you protest.
“I said I want my Jared !”
“Don’t care! I’m the one doing all the difficult work here: I have to act, I have to have sex, I have to satisfy my demanding woman, I have to pay attention to all the details, I have to…”
You cover his mouth.
“Fair enough, baby,” the lecture is abruptly interrupted by your candid acceptance and he grins, victorious, while switching off the light. You gasp, enticed: the green toxic hair glows in the dark.
“You like this new turn on my Joker?” he wants to know as he tears the flimsy strings apart one by one.
“This is soooo cool!” you run your fingers through it. “It’s very Halloween-ish,” and his rough kiss leaves you breathless.
“Shut up and let me enjoy my treat, woman!” J growls and your comeback delights him:
“I’ll do whatever you say, Mister Joker.”
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