i am an 8 year old boy who makes jokes about pee


Originally posted by iyeolie

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warning: Language, Suggestive Themes (not smut)

Song:: In Heaven- JYJ

Have fun teaching your night class hyunny! xoxo, your ex-girlfriend.


As much as you love your sister, the constant nagging to you about what to wear to the date with her boyfriend was driving you up the wall. She had been dating him for 2 months now and you had thought the stage of perfectionism was long gone by now. But, no, you’re over bearing, ‘I have to look pristine at all times’, older sister doesn’t just walk out in jeans and a shirt. She’s always been this way, but you began to think her new boyfriend was one of those rich guys who want a girlfriend who looks like a model 24/7.

  She never told you his name, nor did she tell the names of any of her past boyfriends either. She had this thing where she had to know they were the one. No matter how many times you ask to meet them, she gives you the same answer every time. You began to think she only said it to piss you off.

“Can you at least give me the initials?”

“It’s not like you’ll know them.” She said and it gave you a peek of hope, “Anyway, no. I’ll tell you when I know he proves his love and I know he’s my soulmate.”

Boom. There it is.

  You thought the one or soulmate thing was ridiculous. They don’t exist. Nobody is born for another. The only thing that exists is trust and learning to love someone. You’ve told her to lay off dating for awhile as she’s so keen on finding the one for her, it might do her some good. You tell your sister that all the time, but she never listens to you as she goes out with someone else. She’s gone through three so far and you hope this fourth one lasts.

  Now, for her boyfriends, she’s had three. Sehun. Junmyeon. And poor Yixing. Sehun was a boy in your class. You never she dated him till she came home with him after 4 months. They fought a bit and she broke up with him. She came up to your room right after she did and you both watched him whine and stomp his way to the BMW his daddy bought. She then proceeded to complain about how spoiled he was and that she’ll never date a younger guy ever again. Next was Junmyeon, who like to be called Suho for some reason. He was the boy your sister considered her soulmate. She thought he was the most beautiful man she ever saw and you had to agree. They spent every moment together, from the day they started dating to the day they broke up. The day before their 2 year anniversary. He said he had lots of business and he didn’t want a girlfriend to cramp his flow. Whatever that means. Lastly, comes Yixing. Poor sweet Yixing. He was a sweetheart but was so clueless as to your sister’s intentions. He was Suhos Chinese business partner. She only dated him to get back at Suho and that ‘relationship’ lasted a whole 3 weeks.

  Mystery man number 4 is a guy you like to call Pee-wee. You might not know what his name is or what he looks like but, your sister still tells stories about him. Like the time he tried to prank his roommate Kyungsoo with cling wrap in the doorway but, ended up smashing his own face into it. Or when he attempted to make cupcakes and put too much baking powder in them and they turned into a big monstrosity in his oven. As much as you enjoy the entertainment of his idiocy, you don’t think he’s going to last with your sister.

“Hey Y/N! Can you pass me those thigh highs?” Your sister snaps you out of your thoughts and you look behind you to where she’s pointing to grab what she’s pointing at.

“Why thigh highs? They’ll make you look like a school girl. Not the good kind might I add.” You frowned at her, not understanding her less than average fashion taste. She grinned at you before snatching said fashion taste out of your hand and started pulling them up your legs.

“That’s the point. Your big sis is planning to get some in these bad boys!” She snapped the ends of the socks with a thwack! and wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. You furrowed your eyebrows at her and retorted with an appropriate ‘ew’ making your way out of her room.

  She laughs, following you out into the hallway. You scowl at her, “You better be ‘getting some’ somewhere else because I am not about to hear you in the middle of the night. I have classes tomorrow and I don’t wanna walk in looking like The Walking Dead.” You point your finger at her one more time before you slam the door in her face, trying to ignore her laughter.
  The next morning, you thank your lucky stars that your sleep didn’t get disturbed. Your sister didn’t come home last night and you guess it’s because she was busy. All night. You shake your head in disgusted as you made your way into the lecture. You placed your books on the table and looked around, not spotting the teacher yet. Sitting down in your self-proclaimed assigned seat, right in the front row, you took out your phone and play around with it till the teacher arrives.
  After awhile, you check your phone’s clock, 8:24 A.M. Class should have started almost 30 minutes ago, you thought, am I in the wrong class? Just as you’re about to get up, the door of the classroom opens to reveal a handsome man, maybe in his mid 20’s. A very handsome man. You’ll take it considering you were expecting a 50-year-old grump. His hair was a pretty brown color with stylish bangs hanging over his forehead. He had brown eyes, typical but still attractive. His face still held a bit of baby fat, giving him a cute look along with his button-like nose. His lips were thin, but not paper thin, with a small dip by the cupids bow. Pretty average height, but he had super broad shoulders. His biceps are freaking nice looking, you thought, examining how they fit perfectly in his black button up.
  You were so caught up in shamelessly checking him out, that you didn’t notice he was looking right at you. His eyes could melt you into a puddle of mush if you stare at them too long. It seemed to be working on you. One of his brows lifted in question and you did the same as you both eyed each other. You swore you saw a flash of amusement on his face right as he looked away from you and cleared his throat.

“Good morning, class. I’m professor Byun. I’m sorry for being so late today, first days are always rough. Even old men like me get confused on time.” He joked. A few people in the class laughed, including you, who snorted at his bad attempt at a cheap laugh. He briefly looked your way, smiling slightly before continuing, “Don’t get used to me being late, it was a one-time thing. I expect everyone to be on time to my lectures.”

  He turned away to start the first chapter and you quickly started jotting down notes. This went on for about an hour before you started to get bored. You rested your chin on the palm of your hand as you teetered in and out of consciousness. Your mind drifted into scenarios of you and Mr. Byun doing cute couple things like cooking together and rubbing ice cream off each other’s mouths. In the middle of your ice skating date, you began to come back to reality and looked around to see everyone making their way out of the class, signaling that the lecture had ended. The apples of your cheeks heat up in embarrassment at the images in your mind and you quickly packed your belongings and made your way to the door. Had I really daydreamed for 20 minutes? You shook your head. At the door, you glanced to your right and saw Mr. Byun looking directly at you. He pursed his lips and cleared his throat before speaking.

“Miss. Y/N. I think you should stay after class to catch up on the notes, seeing as you weren’t paying attention the first time.” He spoke. Oh man, you cursed under your breath, his voice is freaking nice. You nodded slightly and made your way back to your seat. When you were about to sit down, you saw him shake his head and point to the side of his desk. Gulping nervously, you slowly walked to the side of his desk, dragging your chair along with you and sitting down. You made sure to keep a decent length of distance between you both.

“ Is there a reason you weren’t paying attention?” He questioned. It felt as though he was mocking you like he knew why you weren’t paying attention. As you try to speak he continued, “Is it because I’m ridiculously good looking?”

  You snorted out of instinct, “Yeah, let’s go with that.” Mr. Byun’s eyes widened slightly at your remark, it wasn’t the answer he was expecting. You realized how rude that sounded and choked out an apology. He looked at you as you stuttered and smirked. A chuckle rose in his throat before it turned into full blown laughter. Your eyebrows shot up in surprise, thinking he was making fun of you. Looking at him, you could genuinely think your response was hilarious and you giggled along with him. When the laughter died down, you suddenly see how close he is to you. You back up a bit and look at his face.

“You never answered my question.” he nods at you and you look up at him in confusion, “Do you think I’m ridiculously good looking?”

“I-no! I mean, yes. But. sir, I just-I don’t-You’re my teacher!” You stammered, curling your hands and cringing at how high school girl you sound.

“Is that a yes?”


“That’s a shame,” He shook his head, faking disappointment, “ because I find you very attractive.” He side eyed you, the corners of his lips upturning. “And, yes, I am your teacher. But, it’s not like I’m a high school teacher. This is college, we are both legal adults.”

  You debated in your mind whether or not you should say how you really feel before coming clean, “Yes, I think you’re very good looking. Probably the best looking guy I’ve ever seen.” Letting out a breath, you gave yourself a firm nod of approval in how confident you sound. Mr. Byun looked at you dumbfounded. He definitely wasn’t expecting you to say that. He let out a loud ha! right as he started laughing again. You stared at him in awe. You thought he was beautiful when he smiled but, it has nothing on his laugh. It was really cute. I could listen to it forever.

  Once his laughter died down, again, to a small smile, he grabbed your bag from your lap and swung it over his shoulder along with his own. You looked up at him from where you sat in confusion.

“Would you like to go out to lunch with me?” He grinned, holding out his arm. You pretended to think, furrowing your brow and tapping your pointer finger along your chin. You hummed as you hooked your arm around his.

“I would very much enjoy that, Mr. Byun.”

“Call me Baekhyun outside the class room.” You smiled and nodded shyly.

This is going to be a great class.

  Three months later, you’re sitting at your bedroom desk, flipping through your math textbook wanting nothing more than to sit in a cafe with Baekhyun and making up stories about people you see walk pass. You smile at the thought of your boyfriend. You’ve never been so happy and he’s been absolutely sweet. Sometimes he’ll sneak a coffee on your desk before class or send you cute, encouraging texts throughout the day, like; My baby’s so good at studying or I’ll treat you to a meal if you get an A in my class. You made it clear in the beginning of your relationship that he will not change your grade. You want whatever grade you deserve.

  A buzzing sound interrupted your thoughts and you pulled out your phone. I’m sorry baby :( I won’t be able to take you out tonight. I have to teach a night class. You frowned at the text. You knew for a fact Baekhyun hates night classes and would do anything to pawn them off on someone else.

“Do you think I should introduce my boyfriend to everyone when he picks me up tonight?” You heard you sister say. You turned around to see her leaning against your doorframe, arms crossed. Sighing, you look at her, “About time.”

  She scoffed playfully, moving her way towards you to smack her finger on your forehead, but the doorbell rang just before she could reach you. “You’re lucky, next time I’ll get you.” She said, flicking her middle and pointer finger back and forth between the two of you. You laughed and bowed lowly, “Your majesty graces me with her mercy! I thank thee.”

  “Just shut up and come down stairs.” She rolled her eyes, smiling. You laughed again and walked behind her. The door opens right as you sit down on the couch along with your parents and you can hear your sister whispering to her boyfriend. She opens the door wider to reveal her boyfriend to you and your parents. Your eyes widen in shock and you can feel your heartbeat pick up. Baekhyun. Your Baekhyun. Is your sister’s boyfriend.

  Baekhyun stands in the doorway with a tight smile on his face as he greeted your parents. He looked around the room and spotted you still seated on the couch. He looked at you in shock and confusion. You could see the gears turning in his head as he tried to piece together why you were here.

“Baek, this is my sister. Y/N.” Baekhyuns face fell at the mention of the word sister. He looked at you and gave you a nervous smile as he spread his arms out for a hug. But, you just stuck your hand out for a handshake. He shook it gently.

“We’ve met before, Y/S/N. He’s my teacher.” You said, flatly. She blinked at you and smiled, “How is he?”

“As a teacher? He’s a great teacher, but I don’t know him personally so I don’t have an opinion on that aspect.” You could see Baekhyun curl back at your cold answer. He avoided eye contact with you. Your sister smiled and patted Baekhyuns chest lightly as she thought it was a compliment, but he knew otherwise.

“I think it’s time for us to go now, love you guys!” Your sister exclaimed, taking her boyfriend’s hand in hers. As they made their way out the door, Baekhyun turned to glance at you one last time only to see you texting on your phone. Disappointed, he made his way out the door. He felt the vibration of his phone in his coat pocket and took it out to see a text from you.

Have fun teaching your night class hyunny! xoxo, your ex-girlfriend.

Baekhyun hoped your sister didn’t see the tear that slipped down his cheek.

  The next two and a half weeks was absolute crap. You tried to be optimistic and convince yourself there are more guys in the world than Mr. Byun, but it was difficult considering he kept blowing up your phone. It was so bad that you decided to just turn your phone off. Not to mention, you still took his class. You didn’t want to be that sad person who got dumped and wallowed in their own self-pity through ice cream and bad rom-coms. So, you sucked it up, threw away your ‘I just got dumped’ face, and went to class. To which you promptly ignored him, even though he took it into his own hands to call you in after class to try and discuss your relationship issues. You very kindly blared your music and avoided him till he released you. You even successfully slipped all of the things of his that you had in your possession into his room. That’s when the constant trying to win you back stopped.

  You weren’t gonna lie, it kinda hurt when the constant texts and voicemails stopped, but you knew it had to happen eventually. Shaking your head from those thoughts, you tried to focus back on the TV show you were watching. Just as the main characters were about to find the killer, a soft knock sounded on your door.

“Come in.”

  Your sister shuffles through the open door and makes her way to lay beside you on the bed. She turns to face you and you do the same. Her face contorts into concern as she gets a good look at you. The first thing she notices is the redness around your eyes and the slight flush of your cheeks. “Is it because of Baekhyun?” Sha asks, gently.

  You open your mouth to answer, but can’t find anything to say so you close it. You look at her in question as she started to speak again, “He told me. Baekhyun, I mean, He told me about you two. I’m not mad if that’s what you think. I always knew I wouldn’t stay with him, honestly, he was more a friend to distract me from Junmyeon. You fit him much better than I do by far.”

  You started to tear up as you listen to her continue, “He’s miserable with out you, Y/N. I know, we know what he did was wrong, but you two had something special. You still do and I would hate to see you give that up.”

“He cheated on you! With me. You know I’m your sister, right?” You looked at her incredulously, “How are you not pissed at me?”

“I know who you are, don’t worry. I’m not pissed because I have my own secret,” She started and glanced at you, who prompts her to continue, “I cheated too. With Junmyeon. He came to me asking for me back about three months after I started dating Baekhyun, but he didn’t know that.”

You looked at her shocked, “Are you still with him?”

“Not with Baekhyun, that was a mutual break-up, but I am still with Junmyeon. I love him, just like you love Baekhyun.” Just when you were about to protest, she lightly smacked your cheek, “I know you love him and you have my blessing.”

  You smiled at her and softly nodded to her in thanks. Reaching for your phone to text Baekhyun, your sister suddenly gripped your arm and pulled you out of bed. You had no time to react as she dragged you towards the front door and pushing you out onto your front porch. You stumbled back, but before you fell, two arms and a chest caught you. Turning around, you spotted Baekhyun and pulled away from him and crossed your arms around your chest.

  He looked especially handsome today, dressed in ripped jeans and a baseball tee. His hair was in the style you liked. Worn down and messy. You noticed the woven bracelet on his wrist that you made for him at a new cafe downtown. You realized you’re wearing the same bracelet that he made on your wrist as well. You saw his head tilt a bit to the side, something you loved when he did. He took a step closer to you and grabbed on of your hands, unraveling it from the other. He sucked in a big breath before speaking, looking at you directly.

  “What I did to your sister and you were wrong, I know. I’m so sorry for hurting you both like that, you don’t deserve it. I didn’t mean for all of this to happen. I was going to break up with her the night I came over, but she was so excited to meet her family that I couldn’t do it. then. I saw you sitting there and it took all of my strength not to hug you and kiss you and tell you I’m sorry. The first time I saw you I knew I wanted to be with you, I wanna be with you forever. And I know you don’t believe in a soulmate, but I like to think you’re mine. Y/N, I need you,” He choked out, tears threatening to spill onto his cheeks, where as mine was already flowing freely, “I love you.”

  You sighed, looking away from him. What he did was wrong, everyone could admit that. But, on the other hand, you’ve grown comfortable with him and you’ve missed him an awful lot these past three weeks, Plus, your sister gave her blessing.

  Baekhyun stood in front of you, patiently rocking back and forth on his feet. He perked up a bit when you pulled your hand from his. He bit his lip anxiously before he stumbled back from the force of you buying yourself in his chest. Your arms wrapped around his waist in a tight hug and he lifted you up, twirling you around. As you pulled away, you gripped the sides of his face, gently lifting your lips to his in a sweet kiss. You looked at him, your lips still centimeters apart.

“Baekhyun.” You whispered. He hummed quietly.

“If you ever do that, or anything close to that again, I’ll make sure you won’t be able to walk again.”

You swore that was the hardest he ever laughed.

things we lost in the fire

so you know that fic war kay and i are fighting? well. here’s my move. checkmate.

AU in which 10k died, and then he didnt

The hospital is on fire. You’ve been taking refuge there, a nasty virus sweeping the state. 10k, Addy, and Vasquez got it. They were puking blood, their skin covered in boils, their eyes glazed over as memories ravaged their minds.
Addy and Vasquez got sick first, and recovered first.
But not 10k. 10k is still inside. He’s still sick. So, so sick.
They have them all locked into one of the wards, all the sick ones. They can’t let them out. Fire licks its way up the building, and the other sick patients run around the ward, trying to get out.
“We can’t leave him!” You scream, tugging against Warren’s hold.
“We don’t have a choice!”
The doors to the sick bay are locked by one of those on the outside, and you see 10 standing against it, a palm pressed against the glass.
“Let me say goodbye!”
“We don’t have time, Y/N!”
You jerk away from Warren, and press your hands against the glass, on top of his.
“I love you. I’ll always love you.” You say.
His mouth opens slightly, blood coating his lips, and you can see the moment he realizes that this is it. This is the end.
You can see the moment his heart breaks. Because it happens at the same time yours does.
You want nothing more than to strike the glass until it shatters. To run away with him, to hide him.
But if the virus spreads, it’ll kill whatever humans are left. It’ll make them helpless while they suffer. It’ll be like a buffet for the Z’s.
This whole mission is to save the world. And as much as you want to, you can’t throw it away.
No matter how much you love the boy stuck on the other side.
“It’s okay.” He mouths. A sob bursts through your lips, and then Vasquez is grabbing you, pulling you back.
“We need to go!” Someone screams. Heat smacks against you, and you give 10k one last look, one long look, trying desperately to tell him everything. Then you’re being dragged back, the moan of a Z pulling your attention away. You pull the machete from your belt, and jam the blade into the Z’s skull.
Then you’re fleeing into the night, away from the fire, leaving 10k behind.

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Iron Legends -- Chapter 8

Series: Fairy Tail

Characters: Gajeel, Levy, plus appearances from Natsu, Lucy and others.

Genre: Hurt/comfort, Sci-fi

Summary: The old lab had always been fuel for a good story, something you would half-heartedly joke about going to sometime.  Some did, and when they came back they never talked about it again.  The legends circulated, telling of ghosts, monsters, and anything else someone would be likely to conjure up about an abandoned building.  But even with all the stories meant to keep everyone away, there are still those for whom the intrigue is too tempting.  

Note: Not a super thrilling chapter and kind of short for all the effort, BUT this is building my bridge to something.

Ch. 1  Ch. 2  Ch. 3  Ch. 4  Ch. 5  Ch. 6  Ch. 7 Ch. 8 Ch. 9

“Thank you!  Come back soon.”  Levy flashed a bright, customer service smile at the patron was headed out the door with their new books.  The jingle of the door closing finalized their exit, and she set about closing up the store for the day.   It had been four days since Halloween, and additionally four days since she had actually seen her dragon.

The first day after Halloween was difficult.  She had been so spaced that multiple times customers had to try more than once to get her attention, and she hardly got anything done.  When she got home that evening she was exhausted, and her thoughts kept her awake for most of the night.  

The following days got easier only in the aspect of being able to keep herself occupied.  Her efforts to decipher how she felt, however, had made no progress.  Consequently, her productivity after that first day was better than it had ever been, and with her short stint off work she had been more than willing to pick up shifts for the people that had to cover her.  After all, it was only fair, and it also kept her here from open to close.  Which wasn’t awful; the constant activity and steady flow of tasks did wonders to keep her thoughts on one track for the majority of the day.  Still, when she wasn’t working, she expected him to show up any minute.  With no luck.

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