i am a wretched soul i know

Days fog, can’t see past the edge of what’s gone, but I’m hoping I’ll try. And the rain shines, and the showers and the fawns in the field arrange in my eyes, so why fight? With nature’s call around, you talk about frights in the verse of every song. You tell me what’s wrong, but what’s right? You’re seeing creation, that crushing never-ending change is so full of love. And so you’re waking to face the change in your role, and with each restless shiver you wretch from your soul, you’re asking is that something I’m not anymore? A brother to shake these broken chords ‘till they turn gold. And I tried to survive without that gold, and wondering why our exchange can never hold. Am I what’s wrong? Well what’s right? Stop trusting in demons. You’re scattered, ever-lonely buddy, but so full love. Please stop repeating your terror, you choose what you see. It’s always “what if?” and “why not?” Man, you gotta just be. Simplify, define your goals and watch them grow. Be your own true self, the you that I know. Days gone, as I peer past the edge of what’s lost. I’m starting to cry, but the rain’s fine. And the tears feel warm and my body is humming alive. In time, you’ll revive what you thought dead. You’ve stopped your own climb on the verge of every end. You tell me what’s wrong, but what’s right? Stop believing your being’s been shattered and distorted, ‘cause brother you’re so full of love. And so you’re hoping to make a change in your role, repeating mantras to find some ground for your soul. Stop asking. Is that something I’m not anymore? A brother to shake these broken chords ‘till they turn gold. 

A Discovery of Love- 2/7/17

Such hated words,
Such fervent longing,
Such heated skin, set ablaze by just a look!
Oh, that we sing the first divine symphony of life, with only a wild heartbeat for tempo!
My soul thrums with you alone, and you, shuddering, make as if to set me free from this wretched world.
I am drunk with power, heady, rich, sated.
How are we as one?
How can I feel myself through your fingertips?
Caresses commanding violent wave after wave as we stain each other’s skins with blood.
Of course, I will feel you forever. Tomorrow will never come, but I will rise with the sun just the same. I know I will still have your heart clenched in my first. I know you will have already swallowed mine whole.

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Wretched I am
These actions I will take
To make you suffer
Til’ you’re dead and gone
You cant separate me
I’ll desecrate thee
I’ll destroy all that you know and love

I’m sorry for the torture you’re enduring
Your body is now under my control
No one can save you
Now that I’ve enslaved you
They’ll run away in fright
Your soul is mine tonight

Why can’t someone please just save me
Why can’t someone set me free

You’re soul is mine tonight

you, biblical entity clothed in white.
me, damned soul, dripping red. 

but your white robes hide sins of multitudes. of lies and deceit and murder. 

i surrendered long ago but what do you know of parley? you only know of the skull and crossbones, the sign of death.

i am defenceless
against you
you whirlpool, you tornado, you black hole.

you grasp and wretch and seize and swallow. 

but please, 
please, 
remember that once you call, 
yourself a god,
you are in for the fall.

—  zeus is sharpening his bolt | n.s.

Me, waking up in the morning: 

How can Grell be so adorable and monstrous, so beautiful and so feral at once? My eyes and my head and my heart are in such exquisite pain please my lady death I can’t stand it just run me through with your chainsaw, murder me this moment for I am too weak and wretched to comprehend your divine perfection and every day I must spend knowing you cannot exist on the same plane as I do tears a hole in my very soul that bleeds the deepest red, and yet it is a red that pales still in comparison to the deep, rich red of your luxurious soft locks of flowing hair and the sumptuous garments that adorn your alluring form please I am not worthy of the phosphorescent gaze from your eyes like twin emerald crystals, or a single slice of laughter from between your pointed white teeth like slivers plucked from a shattered midsummer’s moon please I