i am a very bored person

Communicating with autistic people

In light of April & autism acceptance month I thought I’d make a post about how autistic people communicate, because understanding and accepting our communication styles is one of the most important parts of autism acceptance. The things listed here are from my own experience and from information I have gathered from talking to other autistic people, it is by no means exhaustive. If you want to add something on I have missed feel free :+)

  • Lack of eye contact doesn’t mean we aren’t engaged, oftentimes maintaining eye contact is actually more distracting than not. 
  • Our body language is different. Trying to assume how we feel from your knowledge of body language will often lead you to wrong conclusions.

  • Our tone does not always indicate our feelings, it’s often more telling to listen to the words we are saying themselves then try to guess what our tone means
  • We will likely have difficulty reading your body language and tone. The subtleties of communication don’t come easy to us, if you want us to understand what you are feeling or offer support it is most useful to communicate your feelings thoughts and needs directly.
  • Things we say may come off as rude or overly blunt, even if it is not intended this way.
  • We have varying degrees of understanding sarcasm. Some of us struggle to understand any of it, some of us actively understand and employ it and everything in between. We are also prone to literal-mindedness in general meaning we may have trouble with taking other forms of jokes or figurative speech literally. 
  • Our communication abilities often vary with things like stress and sensory input. For example, under little stress or a good amount of sensory input I can communicate enough to explain detailed thoughts as in this post, form sentences and employ tone and cadence to my speech. At varying levels of sensory input I may begin to speak in monotone, take several minutes to put together a single sentence, or be unable to access most of my vocabulary aside from sounds and simple words like “yes” and “no”. 
  •  It is very common for autistic people to empathize by comparing similar experiences. (for example: person a: “My dog got sick, I’m worried about him.” autistic person: “Oh, my cat got sick last year too.”) People who do not empathize like this often see it as ‘one-upmanship’ when the intent is only to empathize or express sympathy. 
  •  We may interrupt you before you’re done speaking. It’s very common for autistic people to have difficulty telling when other people are finished speaking. If we interrupt you it is almost never out of rudeness but we genuinely cannot tell when is the right time to speak.
  •  We may occasionally take over the conversation especially with info-dumping. When I info-dump I’m very excited and I feel like I can barely keep the information I want to talk about down. Being so excited, I tend to ramble for a long time, elaborating unimportant details as I am unaware to whether the listener is bored or even listening. I’m not saying you have to stay completely engaged and remember every detail but at very least don’t get angry with an autistic person for their infodumping.
  •  A lot of autistic people also have auditory processing problems. This means that what you say might not register for a few moments or you might have to repeat yourself. Please be patient with somebody who has poor auditory processing, as it’s not really something we can help. 
  •  If you are asking the autistic person to do a task or activity of any sort (giving them directions to somewhere, asking them to come to a party, asking them to help you fold your laundry) we usually need very clear and precise instructions or plans.

These are all common parts of autistic communication styles but it’s important to remember not every autistic person is the same or will have all of these traits. We are as varied in personality, thoughts, and behaviors as allistic people, but we are tied together by shared experiences. Being aware of these traits and unlearning them as inherently bad communication styles is helpful to autistic people as a whole, but if there’s a specific autistic person in your life you want to better communicate with, the best thing you can do is ask them how you can do that and honestly discuss differences in communication and needs to best understand each other.

I don’t think people understand why we’re collectively angry about the way joseph’s route went. Honestly, it would have been nice for an actual christian whose an authority of the church to come to grips with his sexuality and decide that yeah that’s ok and that he can still be a christian regardless. 

Also, none of the twists make sense narrative wise. Up to this point, we’ve been lead to believe that Mary is not only a neglectful drunk but is also a cheater (while not physically cheating flirting with anyone is still considered a form of cheating my dudes). So, why would you paint her as the victim in the end. 

This trope has been played here and back and it’s not only boring, but it makes no sense for the character to be this way. You can say “Oh you’re taking this too personally”, well damn right I am and here’s why:

1) The way Mary was initially depicted reminded me quite a bit of my mother. Someone who cheats on her marriage without any regards to how her family might feel and seems to be very distant and emotionally cold to them. Do you know how rare it is to see a woman like that depicted in a negative light. Call it me projecting my anger, but I was looking forward to a woman like this getting her comeuppance when women actually being abusive and manipulative is so often glossed over and they so often get away with it. I wanted this to be a thing for once

2) I’m so tired of seeing the “wow you thought this person was actually nice lol we’ll show you. That’s what you get for trusting people” trope played to death. This twist came out of left field. It’s also majorly ooc for a guy we seen had been absolutely adoring and caring of his family and patient with his wife. 

3) This is fairly damaging to people like me who grew up in a conservative household with a mostly religious family who were of course kind of homophobic. I thought it would be nice to see representation of a religious man whose lgbt and still decides that he can be lgbt and still be religious. Do you realize how impactful that would have been.

But no instead of a positive narrative about a kind and cool youth minister whose coming to grips with years of internalized homophobia and learning to slowly accept himself and work through realizing that yeah his family is not perfect and he needs to go after what’s best for him and his kids we got whatever this was. But yeah sure judge us for flipping our shit over this crappy twist and all the implications it holds.

the harry potter books rated by mentions of how handsome sirius is
  • philosopher's stone: no direct mention of sirius but hagrid gives harry a photo album with pictures of his parents and you know sirius is being actively handsome in at least a third of them (5/10)
  • chamber of secrets: a hollow, empty book (-10/10)
  • prisoner of azkaban: uncle vernon disapproves of sirius' hair at the beginning of the book which means it looks sufficiently punk rock even after twelve years in prison. harry thinks sirius looks handsome in the photo from his parent's wedding day and hp is super pissed off at that point so it must be an objective fact; other than that not a great time for sirius or his #look (7/10)
  • goblet of fire: sirius looks good even when his face is made of flames. feels true and right. (8/10)
  • order of the phoenix: an entire flashback devoted to the "casual elegance" of sirius' hair and how good-looking he is. at one point he looks "rather haughty and bored, but very handsomely so". excellent stuff jkr. would get full marks except for my inability to accept the end of this book (9.5/10)
  • half-blood prince: one can only hope that sirius is keeping it fresh up in wizard heaven but who can say for sure (2/10)
  • deathly hallows: sirius is described as carelessly handsome in a photo, although im personally skeptical about how careless it was. ghost sirius is tall and handsome, as per usual. (8/10)
Creating Characters

Personally, I’m a firm believer that it’s the characters that make a story great. You can have the worst plot in the history of the universe, but if you have interesting characters, a reader can look past a boring plotline.

I am not a fan of listing off personality traits when you first start to create the character. I think it gives a very narrow definition of who the character is and doesn’t leave a lot of room for development and change.

To start, I come up with a simple phrase to describe their role in the story. Let’s say my character is Batman. I’d call him a “millionaire vigilante”.

Next, I think about where they come from. Where would the character have to come from in order to wind up in that place? Why would Batman become a vigilante? How did he become a millionaire? I would answer those questions. His wealthy parents were killed by a criminal, which left him with a strong opposition to crime and injustice.

Then, I fill in all of the holes in the story by asking myself more and more questions about the backstory. I add in an enormous amount of detail during this stage. Make the backstory as detailed as possible. Real people have detailed backstories and memories. The character should as well.

Next, I come up with a list of likes and dislikes. Now, I see people using a likes and dislikes list for food preferences and such. But, that is not what I mean here. Come up with a list of traits that they respect in other people. Come up with a list of traits they don’t like in other people. Keep their backstories in mind as you do this. Oftentimes, those would affect how they perceive the world and the people around them.

After this, I usually have a strong idea of who the character is, but they still do not have a voice. Every single person speaks in their own way. Some people try to be funny in every sentence while others are solemn. Some are quiet. Some never shut up. Think about the way they interact with people and hoe they’d want others to view them. Think about where they were raised and what sort of accent they’d have. Do they use slang? Are they loud? What type of sentence structure do they use? Are they precise or detailed? Do they exaggate? What about manneurism and body language? How does their communication change when their happy, sad, or angry? The more detail you put into this stage, the more unique dialogue and interactions you will get from the character.

After this point, I list off the traits. I make sure some of them are self-contradicting. It makes them more complex and, in turn, realistic.

Then, I try to take as many personality quizzes online as possible as the character.

Finally, I come up with the less important things like food preferences, favorite colors, and favorite animals, the more trivial aspects of a character. Still, creating them helps make a more realistic character.

Illegal (Part 1)- Park Jimin Racer!AU

Originally posted by kpophott


Genre: Fluff/ Comedy/ Angst

Pairing: JiminxReader

Word count: 6.002k

Summary: During your staying in your grandmother’s house you meet Jimin and discover the night life that’s beyond the calm appearence of the town.


“Don’t worry about her, she is safe with me. Now go before you’re late!” Your grandma shouted from the front porch.

You could see your father face by his the reflexion on the car’s mirror. He tryed to look not affected, all tough and unbothered, but you knew best. The minute he would drive off and pass the town’s sign, he would burst into tear and start sobbing like there was no tomorrow.

It wasn’t just him who felt uneasy about this whole situation, you did too. Since your mother left you two alone, without any previous warning, that your dad had never went back to being how he was when she was still present. Now, he was always too focused on work, to the point where you would have to force him out of his office to eat or to just lay on a bed and close his eyes for a few seconds . But you didn’t judge him, though, you knew that that was the way he used to cope with the pain he felt.

It was your grandmother who convinced you to come and stay with her for a while, saying it would be for her since you two could spent more time together, and, at the same time, it would make your dad a bit more independent for when your classes at the university finally start. It sounded good to you, a nice way to clear your head from all the stress that you felt with your whole dad situation and exams, so you took her offer.

“He will be okay, he is stronger that you think he is, Y/N.” She said, caressing your arm and leading you inside, towards the kitchen.

Her house had a very nice aura to it, very cosy and bright, filled with all types of flowers everywhere. Since you grandmother loved gardening, having plants around her house and become a must.

“So, now that I get the chance to get you all to myself, how do you feel about us baking some cookies? The chocolate chips ones? Your favourite?” She asked and your stomach growled in response.

“Sounds good to me.” You laughed.

You turned on the television, to have some background noise, since it helped you to not overthink this whole situation and to not wonder way to far on your thoughts. Usually when you overthink things it would only got worse, for you that is.

Everything is going to be fine. It has to.

“Honey” Your grandma called from the kitchen, while holding up some tools and ingredients “I realized that we are missing the chocolate bits. Could you go to Mr.Crumberry’s shop and get me some of them? There are some coins on the table if you don’t have enough money.”

“Sure thing, it’s still the last shop on the left, right?” You asked, getting up from your spot on the couch and taking the coins with you. She hummed in response as you kissed her cheek and promised to come back quickly, closing the door behind you, carefully, to not make much noise.

Outside was a bit windy and not many people could be seen. The town wasn’t very big itself but, it had a lot of people around your age and a bit older too. You weren’t familiar with any of them, though, since you barely came here.

In general, you never had many friends due to the fact that you always were busy with university or taking care of your dad, by making sure that he was taking good care of himself, which left not much time to hang out with other people. The only person that you still found the time to be around was Taehyung, a guy who you had met a few years ago and apparently lived right down the street from you. You two had become friends in a strange manner, mainly because he never stopped bugging you, appearing always by your side during lunch time, making rather random visits in your house and bringing you the latest movies for the both of you to see them together. So, you decided, “if you can’t beat him, join him”.

From the minute that you introduced him to your dad, they became great friends as they both shared a passion of finding new animal species. Not the wisest decision you’ve ever made. Let’s just say that you came home one day to find a bunch of different hamsters on your couch.

You were so absorbed in your thoughts from your hometown that you didn’t even notice the small salience on the side walk, which caused you to trip. You closed your eyes, prepared to collide to the ground, but meting a softer surface instead. Someone’s chest.

“Hey there, careful” A raspy voice said. The person had his hands around your arms, securing you against him. He smelled like mint and cigarettes, and a small pinch of cinnamon.

“I’m so sorry.” You apologized, stepping back. You started to blush when you realized he still had his hands around you, and even with the small space between you two, you could still feel your heart pounding against your chest. “Are you okay?”

“I should be the one asking you that.” He said, laughing. The first thing you noticed about him was his orange hair. It was an unusual thing to see, very strange, yet he still managed to be one of the most handsome guys you have ever seen. You met his eyes, only to notice that he was already looking at you, giving you one of those smiles that were so bright that made the sun’s light look like absolutely nothing when compared to it.

“I’m Jimin, by the way. Park Jimin.” He added, noticing that you hadn’t responded.

“I’m Y/N.” You shook your head and smiled, trying to distract yourself to not stare at him.

“Well, Y/N, you are not from around here, are you?” He asked, cocking his head to the side, examining your features.

“No, actually I’m not. I’m staying here for some time, at my grandma’s. And I know that I said it before but I’m really sorry that I bumped into you. I had to go to Mr.Crumberry’s shop to find some chocolate bits for my grandma but I got distracted and- ” You rambled. He tucked the hair behind your ear and you stepped back, surprised, only to stumble on that same piece of the sidewalk. Great. Just great. There was no way you were ever going to get out of the house with these pair of shoes again.

“Seeing that you are always falling, do you need company to make sure you get to your grandma’s house intact? I would hate myself if you fell again and I wasn’t there to catch you” He said, winking at you.

“Are you trying to seduce me? Because that isn’t working”

“Are you sure? Because I swear that when I do this” He took a step closer to you and lowered himself, whispering into your ear “I can hear your heart starting to race.”

You rolled your eyes but you couldn’t deny the fact that what he was saying was true. You just had this feeling that he was one of these cocky people and that only admitting that to him would only make his ego grow bigger.

He laughed at your reaction and brushed his hand through his orange hair. You looked at the watch that you had on your wrist and realized that it had passed more time that it seemed, and that your grandma may get anxious if you don’t get home quickly. After all, the shop wasn’t far away from her house.

You started walking towards the store and noticed that he was still right beside you.

“So, Y/N, tell me about yourself.” He said after a while of you two walking side by side.

“What about me?” You asked.

“I want to get to know you.” He said after taking a deep breath. That question made you nervous, mainly because no one ever asked you that, because no one ever cared that much.

“You do? I’m warning you I am a pretty boring person with a very boring life. There is nothing interesting about me.” You say as the both of you get inside the store. You greet the old bald man that is on the other side of the counter while Jimin just waves at him and sends him a small smile.

The store isn’t very big, so you won’t take long to find what you want. The last time you had been here was years ago, and knowing that everything was still on the same place comforted you.

“I don’t believe that. Let’s see, for example… What’s your favourite colour?” He asked adjusting one of his many rings that he had on his hand.

“I don’t have one.” You answered, shrugging.

“What? What do you mean you don’t have a favourite colour? Everybody has got a favourite colour. That’s like the basic requirement for being a human being.”

“Basic requirement?” You laughed, picking up a package of chocolate bits from one of the shelves. “It’s just a colour”

“Just a colour? Whoa. You just hurt me, I hope you know that.” He faked a hurt look and stepped back dramatically while you walked to the counter. You handed your grandma’s coins to the man and said goodbye, politely. Through the window you could see that the sun was starting to go down, a very pretty view actually, but you don’t have the time to enjoy it as you have to get home as quickly as possible.

The cold air hits your face when you get out of the store and you shiver, closing your jacket a bit more. Jimin, however didn’t seem very bothered by the cold, as he continued to walk normally and talking to you, gesticulating theatrically over the fact that you didn’t have a favourite colour.

“I still can’t believe you don’t have one.” He said, shaking his head in disappointment. He seemed to think hard for a bit and then snapped his fingers like he just had the most brilliant idea ever  "You know what? You just gave me a mission.“

“I, what?” You stopped walking, giving him a confused look.

“You just gave me a mission. From now until the day you leave, I have the mission to make you have a favourite colour.” He said. Jimin sounded determined and you got the feeling that he was one of those people that always got what they wanted, so you didn’t object.

You may not admit it to anyone, and not even yourself, but you liked talking to him and you looked to know that he cared about you, even if it all was because of a stupid colour. He was very carefree and completely different from the people that you had met so far in your life, like a breeze of fresh air.

You two continued to talk during the rest of the way to your grandmother’s house. He would, occasionally, try a pick of line on you but you would always dodge him of, which resulted in him laughing at your reactions. You would, however, blush at his words every now and then, and he must have noticed that because he started joking with you.

“Ha, Y/N, are you blushing?” He said, pinching your cheeks with his fingers.

“What? No, I’m not” You lied, moving faster away from him. “It’s hot, that’s all. Are you really following me all the way home?”

“Of course. You know, my mother always told me to follow my dreams” You rolled your eyes at his corniness.

There could be seen a few people walking around the town and some others sitting on their balcony talking to one another. They seemed so close with each other, the complete opposite to your life in the city, where they wouldn’t even stop to great you.

When you saw the house a few meters away from where you were you couldn’t help but to feel a bit sad that this was all over so quickly. You stopped in front of the gate and pointed at the house.

“This is it.” You said.

Even though the town is small you couldn’t help but to be afraid that you may never see him again. You didn’t quite knew why you felt that why, you just did.

Wow.

How did you get so attached to him in just a few minutes?

“I know your grandma!” He suddenly realised “She is a really cool lady. I remember she gave me some of her cookies. Wait… That was for what the chocolate bit were needed?” He asked, his eyes glinting. You nodded in response, laughing.

He sure has heck seemed to really enjoy those cookies.

There was a bit of a silence for a while, while you two standed in front of the gate. He kept fiddling his fingers, like a nervous habit it seemed, while you played with the package that was in between your hands.

“Well, looks like I have to go. It was nice seeing you, Jimin” You said goodbye to him, walking up the little garden that your grandmother had in front of her house.

“Hey” He shouted, like he had just remembered something “Tonight I’m doing something and I really wanted you to come and see. And maybe… you could bring some of those cookies with you?”

“So, basically you just want me to take you the cookies?” You laughed.

“How did you know? I’m I that obvious?” He joked. “But no, I really want you to go. Do you know where the bridge is?” You nodded. “Well, meet me there around ten thirty. You will have a lot of fun, I promise.”

“Okay, I will see if I can go.” You waved at him from the front porch as he walked way, backwards while smiling at you.

“Ten thirty, don’t forget!” He yelled. You stayed there, still, watching him walking away.

You cleaned your feet on the red carpet and open the door, only to find your grandma sitting on the couch watching “The Price Is Right” and swearing at the people on the television.

“How can they not know that it costs 9.75? Are you dumb? Boy, when I go to church I will pray for you” She mumbled to herself.

The moment she noticed you standing behind her, holding the package in between your hands, she turned the television off and run to you, hugging and pacing you back and forth.

“God, you are finally here. I was so worried, what took you so long?” She questioned you, worried.

“Nothing I just found someone on the way and lost track of time. Now that I’m here, how about we do those cookies you were talking about? I’m so hungry” You said, and your stomach growled.

“Someone, huh?” She winked, picking up the package of the chocolate bits that I had brought from the kitchen counter. “Who is the lucky man?”

“Grandma… It’s nothing like that. We are just friends, if you could even call it that. I just met him today.” You picked up the tray and greased it with butter so that the cookies wouldn’t stick.

“If you say so… But who is he?” She asked, excitement evident in her voice.

“Park Jimin.”

“Oh, Jimin!” She said. Her reaction was the same of when someone mentioned Elvis Presley or Bob Dylan, he must be very important to her. “He is a very unique guy, isn’t he?”

“Indeed. He was very surprised that I didn’t have a favourite colour. He said he it was his mission to make me have one or something.” You laughed. He sure as heck was different “How do you know him?”

“Hum… Your grandfather and him where very close. When he… passed away…” She stopped and you continued to knead the dough. Talking about your grandfather was a very touchy subject for her, and if Jimin was as close to him as she said he was, he definatly was someone special. “He visited me every two days to check on how I was doing and of course, to ask me if whenever I would bake again I could give him some of my pastries. But, why did you ask me about him?”

“He… he invited me to meet him by the bridge tonight, he said he wanted to show me something. And I wanted to know if he was trustworthy or not. And since you said you knew him…” You rambled. You opened the first cabined and took out the stars shaped object to cut the dough.

You felt a bit uneasy when talking about this to her, since you came here to spend some time with her and not other people. And much less to have a romantic interest.

If Taehyung was here right now, he would make fun of you. Who would say that the same girl that refused to accept to have a friend was now thinking about romantic interests with someone?

“You have a date?” She asked, happily.

“It’s not a date.”

“Yes, yes it is. My granddaughter has a date! You are growing up so fast” She sobbed into your shoulder.

“Grandma, I’m in college already. I’m not a kid anymore.” You laughed.

“I know, I know. There is no need in reminding me of that. Now go take a shower! By the time you are done the dinner must be ready. Now, go! Don’t you have somewhere to be?” She shushed you out of the kitchen with her oven glove.

“Alright, alright.” You responded. You climbed up the stairs and went to the bathroom to turn the hot water on. Getting rid of your clothes you hop in and close the curtain.

You take your time washing your hair and body, thinking about if you should actually go and meet Jimin by the bridge. You wanted to, that was true, but you still had your doubts. However, those had nothing to do with him, you were just afraid of getting too attached, since the last time you did so your mother had left.

Your grandma was right, you though while you took the shampoo out of your hair,  he sure was unique. You mean, who the heck would make a mission to make someone choose a favourite colour? But you liked that about him, it made him stand out, it made him different from the others.

You turned the water shower off and wrapped one towel around your body and another one around your hair. You stepped carefully out of the shower, to the carpet and took out one comb from one of the low cabins and brushed your hair, wrapping the towel more closely to your body in fear of it falling off while you stretched your arms.

Getting to your bedroom, you change your clothes and blow dry your hair. You see you phone standing on your bed and click on it, seeing that you have three missed calls from your dad. Not a good sign.

“Dad? Is everything alright?” You say into the phone’s speaker. “Dad?”

“Y/N, sweetheart how are you?”

“Fine, how about you? Did you have dinner already? Do I need to call Taehyung to bring you some food?” You said, concerned.

“Jesus, I’m fine. I had some leftovers that were laying around in the fridge, don’t worry. Is everything okay with you? I called you three times and you didn’t pick up any of them.” You could hear some papers falling on the ground on the other side of the line, indicating that he was in his office, working. Gosh, did that man ever stopped working?

“I was showering.” You take your phone away from your ear and notice that there is already nine thirty p.m.. Your grandma must have the dinner ready by now. “Hey, I got to go now, I’m going to eat now. Take care of yourself, okay? If anything call Taehyung, you have his number and he lives nearby.”

“Okay, okay. Don’t worry about me, go and have your dinner. I will call you tomorrow, bye” He ended the call and you left the bedroom, closing the door behind you.

You stepped down the stairs, with the dirty clothes from before on your hands, to find a delicious smell on the air: you had almost forgotten of how good your grandmother’s cooking was.

“There you are!” She said, picking the clothes off your hands and throwing them at the laundry basket that was laying around on her kitchen “Come and sit, you have somewhere to be in an hour, don’t you?” You were already feeling sorry about telling her about it.

She mentions for you to seat in front of her, as she bring the mashed potatoes to the table. She tries to ask you more questions about Jimin when you start eating, and make some suggestions about him and you, which you try to dodge every time. You tell her that you father called and she could feel the worry in your voice, about him being so far away all by himself.

“Don’t worry, he is going to be alright. It may not seem like it but he had become stronger since… you know.” She said.

“Yeah, I’m just scared for him, that he might do something crazy and I’m not there to take care of him.”

“You are a good person Y/N, your father is really proud of you. And so am I.” She smiled. You continued to eat in silence after that touchy subject. You hated to talk about your mother or even think about her.

She had run away with some painter when you were twelve and your father had never fully recovered from that. The worst part wasn’t that he had left without a warning, it was the fact that she didn’t even bother to call you, to check up on you. You were her daughter after all.

As you took one last glass of water the clock strikes ten p.m. and you grow more anxious. Your palms start to get a bit sweaty and you pinkie finger starts to move nervously.

You help your grandmother with the dishes, a job that she was very much unhappy for you to be doing, especially at a time like this, but you needed to stop thinking about it and doing other things was what helped you more. She put some music from her old radio on the background and the two of you danced while cleaning up the table.

This was one of the things that you liked the most about her, the fact that she could transform one of the most simple tasks in the funniest thing ever. You sang and moved all around while putting the glasses back on the cabinet.

“Crap.” You whispered. It was already ten twenty five and there was no way that you were going to be there in time. You had been so distracted by all the dancing and singing, that you forgot to check the clock.

You ran up and down the stairs, putting your shoes on and adjusting the clothes that you were wearing in hopes of trying to look a bit more decent.

“Take some cookies to give to Jimin” Your grandmother said, calmly, while you walked frantically from one side to the other. She opened the door for you and extended you her hand that had a little blue box filled in them filled with the chocolate chips cookies.

“Don’t worry I could never forget the cookies.” You screamed as you run down the road.

You moved your feet as fast as you could, and secured the blue box on your hand, with the fear of letting it fall. The wind was blowing the air out of your face and you could feel your legs starting to become sore. Your brain was screaming for you to stop but your legs just kept going and going and going.

It took you some time to see the bridge since it was being blinded by the huge amount of lights that were around it. It wasn’t normal for that to happen, or at least that was not how you remembered it.

You walked to the parking lot that was by the bridge and you came across tons of people around multiple cars that were parked in the parking lot. They were talking cheerfully, some with bottles of booze in their hands that they passed among them and some others smoking cigarettes. They were standing all around the cars and by the theme of their conversation that you could grasp they were talking about… races?

You turned your head from side to side, looking for Jimin but you, unluckily, didn’t find him. You even asked some girls that were standing together near the yellow car if they had seen him around here or something but they had said that he hadn’t arrived yet. Some of them acted strangely when you mentioned his name but you brushed it off, maybe they had just reacted that way because you were new here, or even because of the way you were dressed.

Unlike them you weren’t wearing shorts or jean, but a very pretty floral dress. Which wasn’t your best decision, because if it would start to get windy you would have to give a Marilyn Monroe vibe.

You walked away from the crowd of people and standed alone against one of the lamps that illuminated the parking lot where you were, hoping that Jimin would eventually show up.

“Y/N!” You heard a voice saying your name and a pair of arms being wrapped around your waist. You jump slightly and you hear him chuckle in your ear.

“You scared me” You say, stepping away from him and putting a hand on your chest. Your heart was pounding against your ribcage and you didn’t know if it was because he had scared you or because of the way he had wrapped his arms around you.

Behind him were three guys that were laughing at both of your reactions. One of them had green hair, the middle one was blonde and the last one had brown hair. Their features were soft and they seemed to be nice people, or at least that was what you were expecting them to be.

They standed a bit far off from you and Jimin and you could help but to think if he had told them anything about you.

“I was afraid that you had changed you mind and decided not to come.” He said, wrapping one arm around your shoulders. You were walking in the cars direction and you felt a huge will of asking him about why he had brought you here and especially, what was all of this, but you didn’t. You had this feeling that he wasn’t going to tell you anyway, like he would say something along the lines of “just wait, you will see”.

“And you felt sad?” You joked.

“Of course. If you didn’t come that meant that I couldn’t have these amazing cookies that you grandmother baked” He said while taking the little blue box out of your hands.

You suddenly thought about what she had said, that all of this was supposed to be a date. A part of you wanted this to be one but the other one didn’t, it was all a lot of mixed feelings and you were afraid that the part that did, would win. You just weren’t ready to get hurt again.

“Why am I not surprised” You laughed. He pulled you even more closed to him, with one hand still wrapped around your shoulders, while the other took out a pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket and put one of them on his mouth.

“Smoking is bad for you, you know?” You said, looking right into his eyes.

“Yeah, a lot of people have been telling me that.” He said.

“And why do you keep doing it?” You asked.

“Because it’s an addiction. Or maybe because the right person hasn’t asked me yet” You blushed at his words. You couldn’t help but to think if this was about you.

“Could you just not smoke this one?”

“Why not?” He furred his eyebrows.

“Because each cigarette takes away eleven minutes of your life.” You answered . However, the next thing that you said completely surprised you. And him too, by the look on his face. “And that are eleven minutes less that I can spend you”.

He stared at you for a long time, with an unreadable face, when the corners of his mouth started to go up and he was smiling. He smiled a lot when he was around you and you liked that.

He took the cigarette out of his mouth and threw it on the ground, stepping on it.

“If you put that in that way, I guess that it’s better if I get rid of the whole package then”. That made you smile, a really widening smile, that ones that you almost never gave to people. Your grandmother was right, he surely was someone special.

“My grandma said that you were very close with my grandfather” You said after a while.

“Yes I was. Your grandfather was a man that knew a lot of things. In fact, before he… hum… passed away, he taught me some of them” He was talking at the same at that he was observing the people that were chatting to their friends. He was watching them  so closely, that it almost looked like he was studying them. His orange hair was pushed back showing off his forehead and he was wearing sunglasses that were laying around his neck, backwards, even though it was night time and the sun had already gone down. His black leather jacket tighten around his back and arms when he crossed them, making his muscles stand out even more. And now, under the dim light that was upon us he was even more exquisite.

“What type of things?” You asked, curiosity taking the best of you.

“Well, you want to see them?” He said, cocking his head to the side. You nodded in response. and He then started to walk away from you and towards one of those cars, the black one.

“Namjoon!” He screamed, loudly, in the middle of the crowd. “Remember that bet we made? How about we do that now?” The people that were scattered around the parking lot started to gather around Jimin, and a tall guy with brown hair appeared in the middle of it, stepping in front of him.

You standed back, watching the whole scene, not knowing what was going to happen next. However your feet started to move involuntary into the middle of the crowd as well, where one of his friends, the green haired one, joined you by your side.

Namjoon and Jimin both got inside their cars and positioned then at the same level and distance to make sure none of them had an advantage on the other. A girl walked into the middle of the road, and then stopped in between the two cars, with a white flag between her hands that were stretched above her head. Jimin and Namjoon adjusted the mirrors and turned on the engines whose sounds were started to grow louder and louder.

Inside the car Jimin relaxed himself into the seat and his eyes started to search for you in the crowd. When they met yours he winked at you and then focused back on the road, making your heart skip a beat.

“Be careful” You whispered, even though you knew that he couldn’t hear you. You didn’t even know who you were saying that to, him or youself.

“I don’t know what is so different about you” The green haired guy said over the loud cheers that the crowd was giving and the tickling of the bottles against each other’s. “He talks about you a lot, which isn’t normal for him. He normally doesn’t care about girls. At least not anymore. But you… I can’t quite put a finger on it”

“What? How do you mean that I’m different?” You asked.

“You made him throw away a package of cigarettes. We, who have been friends with him for years now, have tried to make him throw away one cigarette. One. And we never got to do that. In twelve fucking years.” He said. He had a cold expression, and his tone was a bit harsh, but you could tell that it was only because he seemed to care a lot for him.

As you were about to respond the girl threw the white flag down to the ground and they started to drive off as fast as they could. The crowd screamed louder and louder as they distance themselves even more far away from you.

It was calm for a few minutes, with none of the cars in sight, nor the lights. But it didn’t took long as they both appeared riding the cars into your direction, or even better, the headlights did.

They kept driving faster and faster towards the winning post, side to side, making it impossible of knowing who was going to win. However, on the last second Jimin was able to speed up even more and passed Namjoon’s car, getting to the goal first.

Jimin’s friends went crazy, shouting and dancing everywhere, while Namjoon’s backed away, ashamed of losing the bet.

You found yourself clapping, happily too, and cheering him on.

“I swear that there was something wrong with the engine” You heard Namjoon saying as he got out of the car.

“Don’t lie, man. We both know that it was completely fine. Just accept that I won.” Jimin said, rolling his eyes and brushing the hair off his forehead. “Oh, and don’t forget, cold water and no soap” He added, grinning, while he threw Namjoon his car keys.

“Y/N!” You heard him shout from the middle of the crowd.

“Here!” You said, swaying your arms around, in hopes for him to see you.

He came running to you, dodging some people that were congratulating him along the way and greeting another ones.

When he finally got next to you, he wrapped you in between his arms and lifted you off the ground as you smiled into the crock of his neck.

“So, what did you thought about it?” He asked, excited. His eyes were glinting and you could hear his heart beating fast from the adrenaline that he had felt.

“You were amazing, I’m -”

“Jimin?” You got interrupted by a soft, a feminine voice that belonged to a blond girl that was wearing a rather tight dark blue dress “You did a very good job in there. Got to say that you have evolved a lot.”

“Thank you, I like to think so too” He responded.

However, what she did next was completely unpredictable. She moved in between you and him and kissed his cheek. And you just stayed there, as you felt a pain in your chest.

What. The. Heck.

anonymous asked:

Which is your favourite character in the hp world? And which do you like the least?

For many years my favorite character was Lily Evans (you see, she is the soul of HP stories for me). But now over the past few months my mind was so focused on Harry as an auror that I started to pay more attention to him and his personality. A love and careness for him have grown on me. I have never had too many feelings for the main character before (and I read the books a lot of times). I’ve heard people saying “the most boring person of HP books is actually Harry” and sometimes I even agreed to that (now I am very protective of him). This changed when I painted Harry as an old man (white beard and hair). I’ve started to think of his life and his experiences. How good Harry is with people he loves and how he suffered because of his unwanted fate - and how he became aware of what the things he had to do after so many struggles. He’s such an altruist character. Genuine and even naive sometimes. Such a cinnamon roll, but also a dorky, sassy, dark character, so fun to explore all these sides.
He’s what I think Lily Evans was (and a bit of each marauders), so that’s why I love drawing him and he’s became my favorite character. I’m so glad he survived and got married and had cute babies to hug him and give him the love he deserved through the whole series. He’s my favorite.

I hate Umbridge.

anonymous asked:

Ok so where "do I find the ENXP crowd"? Preferred habitat? Likes? Mating rituals? What to do if I spot one? Do they bite?

Haha, okay, I’m glad you asked because I’ve been procrastinating on making a post like this for awhile and now I gotta. So here goes. Also guys, I’m dividing this male/female so I’m sorry if it doesn’t apply to you, but I don’t have time for any more descriptions (this is gonna be long)

As written by a female ENTP who knows many ENXPs…

How to find ENTPs

Male

  • Male ENTPs look like the rest of the typical dudes around at first glance. But on closer inspection, they probably have a haircut that is supposed to be trendy but isn’t well-maintained and they also probably have crazy socks, or a crazy scarf, or are making some sort of stupid joke as you observe them
  • They joke all the time. Like there is not a time when you’re talking to them and they’re not thinking or talking about jokes. Could be memes, funny animals, slogans or advertisements…really just anything humorous. And they spew it.
  • They’re the annoying ones in the room. ENTPs are called “class clowns” but honestly I don’t find that to be a super accurate description of us since we’re pretty darn ambiverted. So it’ll be the guy in your class or office that’s really annoying yet funny and has outrageous philosophical or political views. Or has a crazy backstory/family life. Something crazy, I promise
  • Can be pretty shy or socially awkward, many ENTPs have Asperger’s
  • They are very silly and tacky. They wear comical shirts, have smirky expressions all the time, and are actual super softies. Like we’re talking hopeless romantic softie if they’re not super unhealthy. The stereotype is that ENTPs are “bouncy” with relationships and go from partner to partner, but that is largely untrue for both sexes. We may have a lot of partners, but we typically go into the relationship at least trying to make it work long term. It’s only that we break up with people a lot based on the fact that we feel like there’s a lot of stagnancy/we get bored/think that our partner is incompatible with us since we’re “hiding” our true selves, etc.
  • Really bad at using social media 
    • Most guys only have a few pictures on their pages, if they have a social media page at all (this is personal experience, not true for all of them, just seems to be a trend)
  • Wide variety of skills/ineterests/hobbies
    • ENTP friend loves skiing, lifting, exercising…and then is unhealthily obsessed with pug puppies and memes
  • Are usually friends with the STP crowd or the NF crowd, either or
    • Does usually have another NTP friend that’s pretty close to them

Keep reading

{Some NSFW Kurt because I am a happily nasty person. Ahem,}

I think I’ve mentioned this somewhere else before but I’ve always thought rubbing/touching the tip of Kurt’s tail would make him all affectionate (as if he isn’t always) and purry but the base would make him nut and almost overstimulate

Sitting next to Kurt while he’s curled up on a couch reading very common for you two, sometimes he’ll read to you happily, in English or German but this time you were just growing bored.
his tail had just sent down his tea cup, you gently grab it, not really alerting him yet since it’s not something unusual for you to do. Without much force you guide his tail towards you, Kurt still not taking his attention from his book.

You start placing light kisses along the spade like tip, Kurt stiffens as soon as you start.
You can tell he’s getting flustered already by how he raises his book higher and closer to his face, still not relaxing but you can definitely hear faint purrs like he’s trying to hide them.

 You smirk, placing one last kiss on it before nibbling on the edge lightly, very curious to what will happen.
Kurt squeaks, dropping his book and looking at you wide eyed, you can now see just how lavender his face is before a puff of blue smoke and your suddenly back in his dorm on the bed with a very flustered Kurt now shyly looking to the side
“Oh? Kurt I thought you wanted to read?” his tail starts swaying, tugging slightly as you still have your hand around near the tip. Kurt swallows, looking back and you, panting slightly and looking back and forth from you to his tail.
You smile coyly “did you like that?” Kurt nods rapidly, his breath hitching went your lips meet his tail once more, feeling your teeth glide against the increasingly sensitive tip.

and, Bonus: Kurt would love it if you grabbed his ass and started kneading it, and if he was on your lap when you started it? he’d almost collapse on top of you, purring into your neck, his tail swishing back and forth (if you keep it up his eyes will roll back and he will start unconsciously grinding against your leg

summaries i wrote to help me remember each eurovision act
  • israel: dudebro #1 singing forgettable song
  • poland: boring wedding dress power ballad smh who cares
  • belarus: hipster vegan couple tongue on stage
  • austria: dreamworks chumbawamba dude
  • armenia: three witches from macbeth but sexy
  • netherlands: obligatory inspiring self-love song (still good tho)
  • moldova: everyone needs a fake saxophone at their wedding
  • hungary: very traditional very nice very hungarian
  • italy: gay gorilla???
  • denmark: suspicious australian girl
  • portugal: beautiful, chill, half-hair ponytail
  • azerbaijan: skeleton chalkboard horse ladder
  • croatia: personality crisis
  • australia: hello cutie what you doin later
  • greece: gay water men and their mama
  • spain: upbeat cheekbone surfer dudes
  • norway: murder your mental issues w/ techno
  • uk: welsh mermaid with PIPES
  • cyprus: something about gravity idk it was kinda boring
  • romania: yodel rap bitches
  • germany: TITANIUUUUUUUM
  • ukraine: punk guys wearing... hospital gowns?
  • belgium: booooooring
  • sweden: middle aged boy band
  • bulgaria: fuckboy in training
  • france: yawn, but a yawn that reminds me i am gay
BPD feels.

Him: *literally does nothing to show that they are thinking of leaving. Is very reassuring, caring, treats me better than anyone else ever has, spoils me, makes plans for our future together, is patient, listens and holds me thru my breakdowns* I love you, beautiful.

Me: PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME. WHAT DID I DO WRONG? ARE YOU MAD AT ME? Are you getting bored with me? Am I too much for you? Am I draining? I’m toxic aren’t I? Do you find me manipulative? I love you too but I’m saying that because I mean it not because I’m trying to guilt trip you into staying with me… Did I do something wrong?

I may have spent a really long time making this cake today. As someone who thrives off creativity I had such a good time decorating it (and coming up with all the separate components). It’s also evident I am not the time of person who believes in ‘less is more’ 😉. The best part of it all is that ever single thing is vegan. Apart from cake making and the boring part of cleaning a very messy kitchen, I can’t actually remember what else I did today, although I did have a good solo dance party and watched a few episodes of Gilmore Girls.

 P.S cake taste great, thank goodness!

What Sex With 5SOS Would Be Like Based Off Their Venus & Mars Sign

I’m really into astrology so this is going to be a blurb (?) on how I think sex with the boys would be like based off of their Venus and Mars signs enjoy

disclaimer: i’m in no ways a professional okay don’t come for me if you don’t agree with something i said but i’m all up for discussion on it though! these are my opinions based off their birth charts okay cool. feedback is always appreciated

(if you’d like to see 5SOS’s birth charts explained and all read the link below)

https://5sowoc.tumblr.com/post/161325008892/5sos-birth-charts-explained

Quick rundown

Venus represents love/romance
Mars represents sexual desires

Obviously these two play a big role in sex so this is about how I think these two work hand in hand with the boys and their sex lives.

Keep reading

Doodles

“Dude, you have paint on your arm.” Jongdae gestures at the stained skin on Minseok’s arm. 

Not even bothering to glance at his arm, Minseok nods in acknowledgement and merely states, “It’s nothing new.”

Keep reading

Unpopular Opinion: I think Harry Styles could be a good actor

With all this talk about Solo Harry, I decided to explore my personal favorite topic: ACTOR Harry.  I’ve been threatening to make this post for a while and now i”m finally bored enough to do it.  Buckle up, kids.  I’m pretty (read: VERY) long winded. I have a lot of thoughts. Quick background info on me and why this topic interests me- I am an actor/producer living and working in a major US market- originally trained in musical theatre, still dabble occasionally in that, but mostly work in straight theatre and indie film.    

Listen, i know what you’re thinking, but hear me out.  He really would be great! There are just three caveats:

1) He’d have to actually WANT to do it. I know this might sound silly, but how often do you see famous people take a cameo just because their manager said it would be good for their career and/or image? Acting isn’t easy.  It’s a craft just like music or any other art form.  And if your heart isn’t in it, what’s the point?  

2) He would have to have the right director. Theatre would be the best bet when it comes to a first time big acting project.  There’s a lot more time to rehearse and build the character and grow. The director could take his time to guide him.  Film happens a lot more quickly and a lot of times the director focuses more on the over all picture rather than individual performances.  When I first started acting on-camera, I was so lost.  “What do you mean we just run through it once for blocking (aka knowing exactly where to walk/stand/move) and then it’s go time?”  A lot of the times you have to do your work on your own, sometimes literally.  For example, if there’s a close up on an actor talking to someone else in the scene, there’s a very strong possibility the other actor they’re talking to isn’t even in the room.  Someone else could very well be reading their lines and the actor being filmed has to go with it and pretend they’re having a conversation with someone.  This can be really tough for those that don’t have a lot of experience.  TV moves even more quickly than film and there are less takes per scene meaning less chances to get your performance right so again, for someone new, this can be very intimidating.  That being said, there are plenty of directors out there known for being “Actor’s Directors” meaning they take the time to help the actor along.  If Harry is to start with film (which I very much think he should do over TV), he’d just have to find the right fit. 

3) It would have to be the right role.  Firstly, Harry would be terrible at straight up comedy.  Comedy is not easy.  There was a great post going around not too long ago about how Harry isn’t funny- goofy and witty, yes, but not exactly funny, mostly due to his lack of timing.  And in comedy, timing is everything.  He would end up trying way too hard and it would come off as over the top.  I mean, we’ve all seen iCarly, right?  Although, to be fair, he’s not really THAT much worse than the other actors on that show.  It’s MEANT to be over the top. Even still, a comedic role is not going to be his best fit.  This is why when people started getting excited over the rumors of him being on Scream Queens, I was dead set against it.  Look at Abigail Breslin- she is a fantastic actress, yet on that show does not shine at all.  He could probably pull off the lead in a romantic comedy, but as long as he was more of the straight man (heh no pun intended) to the comedic romantic interest.  I think he’d be great at playing the bad-boy-with-the-heart-of-gold: Logan Echolls (moody one minute, goofy and over the top the next) or Jordan Catalano (bonus points for music playing, the fact that I totally want to see him follow in Jared Leto’s footsteps plus EXTRA bonus points for the Azoff connection).  Judging by his songwriting alone, I think he’d need a role with depth for it to actually interest him and make him want to do it justice.  As for theatre, in about 15 years I want so bad to see him play Hedwig in Hedwig and the Angry Inch.  I think he’d be brilliant. Again- with the first two caveats in place.  

Reasons I think Harry would be a good actor: 

1) Now I know we’ve all heard the “he’s a terrible actor because he can’t lie” or how fakity fake fake he looks with all his winter girlfriends.  But here’s the thing- acting isn’t about lying.  There are obviously vary many acting schools and techniques out there, but my personal go to is Meisner technique whose goal is to get actors to "live truthfully under imaginary circumstances.“ That’s right, Truthfully. Most of the best actors are terrible liars in real life and vice versa.  I mean, come on, has anyone seen Taylor Swift in Valentine’s Day?  If you have, I’m very very sorry.  

2) Harry is very perceptive.  You’ve seen him with fans that are crying.  He knows just what to do to calm them down.  He knows how to pick up on social cues and react accordingly.  This is important for an actor as your job is to react to what the other person is putting out there, not just spitting out your own lines.  

3) He wears his heart on his sleeve.  Harry feels things deeply.  He’s sensitive. While he’s learned to minimize all that now, we’ve seen him cry in interviews, we’ve seen him bark out unexpected laughs, we’ve seen him pouty. Not being afraid to show emotion is obviously a good trait for an actor to have.

4) Speaking of not being afraid, he’s not afraid to make a fool of himself. As an actor, you’ll be asked to do some of the most ridiculous things you can imagine just to get something that looks right.  You’ve seen that boy on stage.  He’s definitely not afraid to look foolish.  

5) He’s charismatic AF.  He knows how to draw people in.  He knows how to connect with people whether it’s an audience or whomever his scene partner would be.  As an actor, you need to trust your scene partner and the first step in this is building a strong connection with that person.  

I’m sure there are plenty more reasons, but this is already ridiculous long.  If you’ve made it this far, I applaud you.  If you have any to add, bring it!  I’ll happily put them on the list! 

For the record, this is not me saying he SHOULD or WILL be an actor. This is is simply me saying that I will be the first in line at the box office to buy a ticket to any well-directed piece with an appropriate role that Harry wants to play.  

Also @ Harry, if this happens, you should totally talk the casting director into putting me in the film too so we can become BFF.  The end.  

(I believe @bunboyfriend & @fakeaheartattack asked me to tag them when I finally wrote this but i can’t remember who else…) 

Fate/Grand Order EMIYA (Alter) Line Masterpost

EDIT: Updated with his event and birthday lines! His damage lines were just noises so I didn’t put them.

Looks like Emiyas ruining me is a trend that will continue into 2017.

*If anyone is interested in commissioning me, here’s my regular commission page, and here’s my chart for Chapter America/E Pluribus Unum!

Keep reading

like the sun came out

theatre au collab with @jiilys. here’s her part.

a/n: birthday present for @buffysummere​. my dearest lucie. happy, happy birthday dear. i love you more than anything else in the world. including james potter and popcorn.


Ginger Newt Press                                                                     8th February 2009

                                               A Catcher in the Eye
                                                   
By Lily J. Evans

Film: The Wind in the Whomping Willows.
Director: Bathilda Bagshot.
Genre: Classics, fantasy.

The Wind in the Whomping Willows is an epic fantasy tale from renowned director Bathilda Bagshot, of which I was very lucky to attend a screening of last Friday. The story entails the lives of several close, esteemed friends who attend a picnic together in a copse of magically enchanted willow trees. Chaos and revelation ensues.

I was pleasantly surprised by this viewing. The cinematography and filming techniques used were simple yet effective, an homage to Bathilda’s earlier work and the style that has brought her so much praise, and I thoroughly enjoyed watching the plot play out on screen.

However, I found myself riddled with the misfortune of being in an extremely busy cinema, and my viewing was continually disrupted by a rather noisy patron who made a habit of throwing popcorn at the screen despite my polite requests to remain silent during the film.

This did not occur and I found myself frequently distracted—from the naturalistic and impressive acting of Elphias Doge, the unostentatious and utterly convincing efforts of the costume crew, and the enchanting and well-designed sets­­—by the ever-present throwing of popcorn, lewd chewing and ungainly remarks.

It was part-way through this unassuming, whimsical and gripping plotline, dear readers, that I sustained an injury at the hand of the extremely disruptive patron, one that resulted in hours of eye-appointments and optometry scans, but you will be glad to know that whilst my vision has not been effected, my pride has, however, been wounded.

Overall I give this delightful film a total of four and a half stars (★★★★½), even though I did not see the second half of the film and therefore missed out the rest of the companions’ sublime antics. I thoroughly enjoyed this exhibit from Ms. Bagshot, but let it be known that I will be filing my eye bill to the rude and inconsiderate customer who dealt the fatal blow to my left eyeball.


Ginger Newt Press                                                                         3rd March 2009

                                                The Tipping Point
                                                             
or
                                              Who Sank the Boat?
                                                 
By Lily J. Evans

Film: 101 Fantastic Beasts.
Director: Newt Scamander.
Genre: Animals, adventure.

101 Fantastic Beasts is a truly enthralling tale to have hit our screens, directed by none other than the beloved and dedicated Mr. Newton Scamander, whose work, despite sceptical reviews, we have all grown up with and come to cherish. This feature focuses on the mischievous antics of several different and enchanting creatures that are almost too whimsical and fantastical to be true, yet Mr. Scamander brings them to life with poise and effortless direction.

I was extremely excited to be seated for this viewing; Mr. Scamander’s work holds a special place in my heart and I couldn’t wait to bear witness to his next edition. However, it was somewhat interrupted by the same noisy patron who I encountered during the last screening I went to. After voicing my displeasure to this same customer (who, for privacy reasons, we shall only refer to as Jim the Wanker), and copping an earful of his profane and explicit nagging (don’t fret, dear readers; Jim responded to my complaints about my eye injury with equal and yet unnecessary fervour, and I put him in his place by tipping his container of popcorn), the screen was flooded with the technicolour and awe-inspiring animations from Mr. Scamander.

The cinematography was visually stunning and flowed beautifully, and welcomed the voices of actors such as Miranda Goshawk, Inigo Imago and Wilhelm Wigworthy. The story and its design were rife with subtle humour and lively characters, which, coupled with the stunning graphics, made for a very pleasant viewing experience. However, at the end of the film (where, giving nothing away, there was a tear-jerking moment), I could’ve sworn I bore witness to Jim the Wanker sobbing like a child in the row in front of me, which I’m sure had nothing to do with the on-screen death of a fluffy animal and everything to do with him being bitter over having his popcorn spilt and his (extremely large) ego wounded.

Overall I would give this wondrous tale a total of five stars (★★★★★), which, to be sure, dear readers, we don’t encounter often, and, if anything, the viewing experience was only made better the blubbing hysterics boasted by Jim the Wanker who was sitting in the front row. And for the questions as to who started the argument in the first place, I could not tell you who the sank the boat, ladies and gentlemen, but I can tell you that I was the one who tipped it.


Letter to the Editor
5th March 2009
Annie Barrow
23 Writchley St.
London
SW13

Subject: Thoughts on Miss Evans and the March Issue

Dear Ginger Newt Press,
I am writing to you because I have recently been loving Miss Evans’s film review column. I think has very witty and endearing insight on the film industry and I’d love to see more of her work. Also, I think her relationship with James Potter is so cute—how long have they been dating?


Response
11th April 2009
Minerva McGonagall, Editor.

Dear Annie,
Thank you for writing to Ginger Newt Press regarding our March Issue. I sincerely agree with your comments on Miss Evans’ skill with a pen—she has a considerable amount of talent as a writer and as a reviewer, hence why I hired her. I have taken your feedback into account and was already planning to have her pick up more duties at Ginger Newt Press in the New Year. As for your observations on her relationship with Mr. Potter, I showed your contribution to Miss Evans, as I thought it best (and she insisted) that I put in her own response to your remarks.


10th March 2009
Lily Evans, Film Review Columnist.

Dear Annie,
Thank you so much for your compliments! I truly enjoy writing and it is a pleasure being able to do what I love in my position at Ginger Newt Press. I would love to pick up more work in the future.
But I must correct you on one point, as it seems to have been gaining a lot of attention recently—James Potter and I are not dating. In fact, I don’t seem to recall ever even meeting a Mr. Potter in my life. The name only begs familiarity to some incredibly horrific botanic disease, which one would be truly unfortunate to contract.


Ginger Newt Press                                                                          11th April 2009

                                            Panic! At The Theatre
                                                 
By Lily J. Evans

Film: The Cupboard Under the Stairs.
Director: Gilderoy Lockhart.
Genre: Horror, thriller.

The Cupboard Under the Stairs is a classic retelling of the classic horror flick by Beedle the Bard, reimagined in all its glorious terror by Gilderoy Lockhart. Mr. Lockhart—who still maintains his amateurish approach to directing, despite his many years in the industry—also took it upon himself to star in his own retelling, which is a difficult line to toe, especially when it is done so in such a way that lacks talent.

I did not have high hopes for this viewing, and was therefore not disappointed; though the cinematography was strong, the dialogue was poor, and the characters were unrealistic. In fact, the drab quality had taken its impression upon me so much within the first few minutes that I did not even notice (I will not go so far as to say that I did not mind, because I did) when Jim the Wanker sat down beside me, thankfully not munching on any popcorn, because if he was I would not have hesitated to throw it back in his face for the second time.

It seems the one thing Jim the Wanker and I were able to agree upon was how boring the film was; so boring, in fact, that he took to the childish antics of using me as his personal pinching bag fifteen minutes into the movie. In my retaliation, I am glad to say that I won the pinching war, and consider it a personal victory, however Jim the Wanker and I were thrown out by the unaccommodating (and apparently having no sense of cinematic calibre) ushers, and found ourselves on the scratchy floor of the lobby, making up the rest of the plot by ourselves (which I’m sure would’ve been a great improvement upon the original story, considering that it has very little to contest with).

And for all the highly anxious and somewhat relentless readers who want to know more about the not-at-all delightful Mr. Potter, I spent the rest of the evening finding out that we actually have more in common than I originally anticipated. He, for instance, is a pretentious asshole who likes the Great Gatsby (I have not read it, which he gave me considerable—and, in my opinion, unwarranted—shit for); Quentin Taratino is his favourite director (avid readers will know that my favourite is Wes Anderson, which he wrongly scoffed at, undoubtedly because he has terrible taste in cinema, I don’t understand how he ever became a film reviewer); He is also an avid fan of Star Wars (as everyone should be).

Aside from the considerable amount of time I spent in Mr. Potter’s company, I still give this film a grand total of zero stars, which, I can tell you without a doubt, would have been my rating even if I had seen it.


4th May 2009

Hello, Lily, dear,
I did get your last letter—thankfully it came on time!

The weather here has been dismal; raining non-stop for the past few days! Your father enjoys it well enough, but it’s been a struggle to get all the wood undercover—he’s not as able as he once was, but the medicine the doctor’s been giving him for his back seems to be working well—no more endless complaints of back pain!

I know that things have been difficult with Tuney after the last fight, but do try to patch things up with her—I know she can be hard to deal with, but she means well. I really do hope you’ll come to the wedding—she has invited you, after all.

Anyway, I’m so, so glad to hear you’re doing well. I’ve been absolutely loving reading your columns—they keep getting better and better! It’s such a great position for you to have and your father and I are so proud of you. Hopefully they make you editor some day!

But as for this business with the Potter chap, you really ought to make a move. I saw the pictures from the premiere and the way he was looking at you—my goodness! That kind of admiration is not something you see every day.

I know you’re going to be as stubborn as ever on this subject, but just give it a shot! You have no idea of the amount of happiness you could get out of something like this.

And for goodness sake, you talk about him often enough, it’s a wonder you aren’t already dating!

Endless amounts of love,

Mum (and Dad) xxxxx


15th May 2009

Hi Mum, good to hear from you,

Hopefully it’s stopped raining by now! Did Dad ever think of asking the boy down the road to help him out? He could use the extra hands. Also, I’m glad he’s feeling better. Nothing like endless days at your desk to give you an appreciation for back pain. I’ve been trying to get out more to stretch it out, but with all the attention my column is getting I’ve been strapped to my pad and pencil.

Mum, you know how I feel about Petunia—I don’t expect you to cut off all ties with her, but I can’t keep making excuses. And I haven’t decided if I’m coming to the wedding yet.

Thank you, Mum. I’ve been really enjoying myself! The reviews are great and McGonagall seems really happy with my work. Editor doesn’t seem too far off, but I don’t see McGonagall retiring any time soon. Assistant editor, maybe. I’d love to pick up more responsibilities.

I don’t want to talk about the Potter boy. He probably had something in his eye that day. Or maybe he was hyped up on cold medicine. He did sound a bit like he had a cold. Don’t push me on this, Mum.

And yes, I’m stubborn, but that’s because I’m right! He’s an ass.

And the only reason I talk about him is because he annoys me. Endlessly. Like a fly that just won’t go away. Or chronic back pain.

I love you (and give my love to Dad),

Write soon!

Lily xxx


                                                           (Part 1)

You have never ached as badly as you do now, sitting in front of your desk while the light is dying, trapped inside the opaque glass panels of the windows. Everything is plumish and purple, like a red wine stain across the sky. You have not been able to think of anything else since that night. When you close your eyes all you can see is him, looking at you, looking into you. The numbness is a like a crypt lodged in your sternum. Even when you are running down the stairs, your coat on your arm and your conscience on your other, and hailing a taxi, nothing shocks you quite like the first glimpse of rain in the sky. A rivulet hits your cheek and runs down, as though you have been crying. You lean against the window the whole way home, tracing patterns in the droplets, watching them chase each other down the windscreen. You pay your fare, slip on your coat, walk inside. You don’t want to watch a film. You don’t want to watch a film because no matter how much you love it, it will never be as good as if he was sitting here next to you, flicking popcorn at you and talking about Quentin Taratino and looking at you, looking at you with those eyes of his, like you are something out of a dream but better, because he is awake and breathing and witnessing you in all your glory, like you are a piece of artwork hanging in the London Art Gallery, like you are a monument in Trafalgar Square, bronzed and standing on a plinth, like you are you. So you pour yourself a glass of wine and hope that it’ll stain your dress because you want to see the colour seeping into the fabric, something concrete, proof that you exist, curl up on the couch and try to reconcile the fact that you’ve been waiting to see him every day for the past week. You barely even notice when the rain starts chucking down outside your window, crying like you can’t. He knocks at the door. You are at the threshold, looking at him as the rain buckets down beside him. He is soaked. He is standing in front of you and asking you out and you do not know how to say no. You want to be beside him in that theatre, throwing popcorn at him, but you can’t stop thinking about how the salt and butter would taste if you licked it off his fingers. He is standing in front of you in the rain and telling you, ‘7 o’clock, Saturday. I’ll pick you up,’ and it isn’t a question. You don’t want it to be a question.

                                                          (Part 2)

He picks you up at 7:15. You are wearing a dress made of red velvet and the leather jacket you stole from Sirius. ‘Where are we going?’ you ask him, and just smiles at you, and your stomach falls out of your ass, and he says, ‘It’s a surprise.’ You knock him with your hip and tell him, ‘Sure thing, Jim,’ and when he winks at you it’s like something grating against your skin, so abrasive and cutting you can barely breathe, because you want to feel those feather-light lashes tickling your cheek, like a gust of air circling your skin. You need him more than you need to breathe. He takes your hand and leads you out to the car, the sensation of his skin against yours all at once too much and not enough. You watch the streetlights roll past the car, dimmed and unfocused lamps, each of them softened by the rain. You think you know where you are a moment before you get there, a glimmer of recognition etched onto the back of your brain like a memory, and you don’t even realise he’s watching your face as you walk into the lobby, like you are better than all these lights and richly upholstered carpets and antique ticket booths. You are holding your breath, like the tremor of your exhalation will rupture the vision and cause it to disappear. He is still holding your hand. You are in the lobby of one the original and restored cinemas in London and it’s like walking into dream. He buys your tickets and you are just stranded in the lobby in a tide of red and white, wondering if you are quiet enough if the dream you are living in will engulf you, because you want it to, and his hand gently closing around yours brings you back to reality, a better reality, a better dream, where he is smiling at you and waving the tickets in your face and dragging you up the stairs and into the theatre. You are walking beside him in the dark and feeling the calluses on his hands and quietly thinking that you could fade away into the darkness, into the night, with him next to you.

                                                          (Part 3) 

The theatre is immense, a mausoleum, and there is only one of them. You feel like you are being presented, like you are in a palace, with intricately carved and immaculate ceilings and endless lengths of red curtain and rows upon rows red leather seats. ‘I thought you might like it,’ he whispers in your ear, the fabric of his suitcoat brushing against your side. ‘I do,’ you tell him, because that is all you can say right now. I do, I do, I do. You endlessly do. ‘Thank you,’ you whisper as you take your seats. His thumb is drawing circles on your palm. ‘You’re welcome,’ he tells you. There could very well be stars on the ceiling, in his eyes, on your skin. And when what little light there is goes down and the screen goes up and it is flooded with light, and it hits you, like a moonbeam, they are playing your favourite movie, Casablanca is roaring out across the screen, you can barely breathe, you are looking at him. You didn’t even tell him your favourite film and he is grinning madly back at you. You want to kiss him. You could kiss him, he is sitting next to you in the dark and smiling and wearing suit pants and white shirtsleeves rolled up to the elbows and aftershave that makes your toes curl. ‘James,’ you whispers to him, and he leans forward, and you say, ‘where’s the popcorn?’, and he tells you that he didn’t get any because his eyes are damaged enough already and he didn’t want to take the risk with you considering how you first met, and you are laughing so hard you can barely breathe and thank God there is no-one else in the cinema because you lean forward and kiss him, kiss him like you’ve wanted to do for the past six months or more or possibly even before you met him, because he is lovely and wonderful and moonshine incarnate, here beneath this palace of stars, his skin tracing yours, gravitational. You give him five stars. You’d give him all the stars in the world, had he not given them to you.

Long Exposure Trans Hcs

(this was bound to happen)

Note: I am not the word of God or anything. These are my personal hcs that I like to think about! If your hcs differ that’s fine, everyone has their own hcs and honestly I love all and any trans hc! Again, this is just for fun and my own little list.

(Also yes, I’m aware some of these characters Wouldn’t be trans but hey, this is all in good fun and it doesn’t many any of em less of an asshole)

Keep reading

You can’t fuck in a changing room

Summary: Kihyun teases you in a changing room and at the dinner table, it ends with fucking in the restaurant bathroom.

Requests are open!!

A/N: have fun reading and ignore the mistakes   Edit: I finally proof read and edited this today (14/06/17) and first of all sorry for putting up with it before lmaoo this still seems to get notes so i thought i should probably edit this a bit, message me if you notice what changed

Genre: Smut

Pairing: Reader X Kihyun (Monsta X)

Word count: 1.7 k

This was supposed to be a chilled evening at home with your boyfriend Kihyun. You waited for him to get home from practice and then you two wanted to order take out and watch some movies. But apparently there were others plans. Kihyun came through your door and you greeted him with a kiss as usual.

“Babe, my parents invited us for dinner later.”

“What? But we wanted to have a nice evening at home.”

You pouted and he smiled at your cuteness.

“I know but I don’t see them often and they really like you.”

“I don’t even have a nice dress for dinner.”

“Then I guess we should go and buy one shouldn’t we?”

You grabbed your jacket and sighed. Kihyun hated shopping if he was so willing to come a long he had something planned. Something bad. You sat next to him in the car as he drove to the mall. He looked gorgeous today. It was not that he didn’t look good everyday but this comeback the company went for a really nice style. And he seemed so happy lately. You looked at him with a bright smile on your face.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yes I was just admiring how good you look.”

He chuckled and blushed slightly. The mall was pretty crowded and you went from one store to the next, searching for a nice dress to wear later. You wanted something black, casual but still a bit sexy. Kihyun looked pretty bored now that you were already in the third store. You had a choice of three dresses and went to go to the changing rooms, as you noticed Kihyun following you. Before you could close the door he manged to slip in with you and you looked at him in confusion.

“Kihyun you can’t come in here with me, I need to try on these dresses. The staff will kick us out!”

He had caged you between his arm his head very close to your ear as he spoke with a raspy voice.

“Shopping is so boring, how about we do something more fun.

His lips trailed along your jawline, down to your neck, gently sucking at it to form a hicky. Nicely visible and in various shades of purple right on your neck. Great.

“Kihyun!! How am I supposed to hide that at dinner? In front of your parents? Who think I’m an innocent and well behaved person? Also on top of that we can’t do this here, we are in public! We probably have like 2 minutes until we get kicked out.”

“Your mouth may say no, but your body is telling me something entirely different babe.

His hand dipped down into your shorts to rub you gently through your panties. You were indeed getting excited by the thought of this. But you still couldn’t do this, think of the headlines when you two were actually caught making out in a changing room. Before you could complain any further he captured you in a kiss, all your worries vanishing in an instant, pushing your panties aside to rub directly at your clit in a rougher manner than before. Your soft moans were muffled by his mouth, still kissing you passionately as you weakly tried to fight against him.

“Kihyun really we can’t do this here what if someone comes in-”

Cutting you off mid sentence he slowly pushed one finger inside you, curling it upwards and holding it there, looking at you with a daring glare.

So you want me to stop now?

He pushed a second finger inside, still that cocky smile on his face and picked up a slow steady rhythm looking down at you.

I’m waiting for an answer.

You shook your head weakly as he thrusted his fingers inside picking up the pace.

That’s what I thought.

You leaned your head into his shoulder and tried to stifle your moans. You were close to your high when you heard a staff member saying in a bored voice “only one person per changing room please”.  Kihyun looked at you deviously as he ever so slowly pulled his fingers out of you. You whined at the loss and at the danger of getting caught but he was quick to find an excuse.

“I needed to help her zip up the dress.”

The women didn’t seem to care, she was already walking off to do some other work. Kihyun wiped his fingers off and looked at you with that dumb smirk.

“Sorry baby I guess we need to continue later after dinner. Also you should buy this dress.”

He left the changing room after carefully peeking out, making sure no one would see that he was coming out of the changing room. You tried on the said dress, frustrated even though you knew he would make up for it later. The dress looked amazing with the right amount of sexy whilst still looking appropriate for a family dinner. There wasn’t much time left till you needed to meet his parents, so you two quickly left the store and went home. You took a shower and got ready, doing you hair and make up nicely, putting on the dress and looked for your favorite high heels that had to be somewhere in the mess of your wardrobe.

“You look amazing babe.”

Kihyun gave you a quick peck as he lead you out to the car. He opened your door like a gentlemen for you when you got in and out of the car and even pulled back your chair so you could sit on it when you arrived at the restaurant. You chuckled at his behavior, trying to look like a pure angelic boy in front of his parents. You knew better.

His parents loved you and you really liked them, they were always really friendly. The conversation carried on as you could feel Kihyun letting his hand brush over your thigh a fair few times. You glared at him before he would pull any shit but he just gave you a little smirk. The evening went on just like this. His hand resting on your thigh, sometimes running it up and down as far up as he dared. As long as he didn’t go any further this would be okay, tormenting but okay. Of course this was not the case as he had to give you a lovely smile and dipped his hand below the hem of your dress to stroke over your lacy panties. Your breath hitched in your throat as you quickly pretended to cough.

“Are you okay love?”

His mother seemed really concerned but you just smiled trying to conceal what just happened.

“Yeah of course, I’m fine.”

You gave Kihyun another warning side glare. The evening wouldn’t end and Kihyun wouldn’t stop teasing you under the table. He didn’t go as far as fingering you underneath the table in a restaurant at a family dinner but you were still frustrated from earlier in the changing room so this was just plain torture. The dessert hadn’t even come yet and you just couldn’t take it any longer.

“I’m sorry I’m not feeling very well I need to go freshen up a bit and maybe catch some air, I’ll be back soon.”

You gave them your most apologetic smile as Kihyuns mother nodded sympathetically.

“What are you waiting for Kihyun, go and look after your girl.”

Kihyuns father had a ever so slight smile on his face that you couldn’t see anymore as you were already on your way to the bathroom. Luckily the bathroom and the entrance were in the same direction so they wouldn’t actually be able to see where you two had actually been. Kihyun had put his arm supportingly around your waist as he guided you into the bathroom. He closed and locked the door behind himself looking at you as you grabbed the sink for some support and let out a deep sigh. He came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist pressing soft kisses onto your neck and shoulder blades.

“Kihyun you can’t do this, you left me unsatisfied earlier in the changing room and now you are teasing me like hell in front of your parents and the evening just won’t end, can we please excuse us and go home.”

I don’t think we’re gonna make it home baby.

Before you could process what he had said he spun you around and lifted you up the counter. In seconds he was kneeling in front of you, hooking his fingers in your panties, pulling them down your legs.

“As much as I love all the teasing, we can’t stay gone for too long so I’ll just make it up to you quickly.”

“Such a shame we don’t have time for anymore teasing.”

“Don’t test your luck princess.”

How could he act so sweet in front of his parents and be so sinful when you two were alone. He kept what he promised seconds ago wasting no time and went straight to your already soaked core, wrapping his lips around your clit. You stifled your moans with your own hand, biting down your finger as he didn’t hesitate at all pushing two fingers at once inside of you. He thrusted them in and out in a quick pace wanting to finish you off as soon as possible. You were already pretty close to coming since he had teased you so much before. Your hands tangled into his hair, disheveling it pretty badly. This needed to be fixed somehow before you left the bathroom to return to hs parents. Kihyun curled his fingers upwards reaching you spot perfectly, quickening the pace and you were gone. His fingers didn’t slow down one bit as he rode out your high and he only removed them when you were whining and begging for him to stop. You slid down the counter holding yourself up as best as you could and turned around to fix your hair in the mirror.

You didn’t really think we would leave now before I fucked you did you baby?

“But your parents, they’re wait-”

Before you had finished your sentence he gave you another one of his deadly smirks and bent your upper body over countertop and grabbed the hem of your dress to push it upwards. You heard him unbuckle his belt as he positioned himself behind you. You were still sensitive form your previous orgasm but even though you hadn’t got much time he always found time to at least tease you a bit. The tip of his dick ran up and down against you folds and clit as he presses kisses up your spine till he reached your ear.

“We will just say you needed a lot of fresh air.”

He finally pushed inside you slowly until he filled you up completely. His rhythm was quick and determined since you two had no time to waste. He pulled out entirely to slam back into you reaching your spot perfectly, looking at your face of pure bliss in the mirror. You were a whining and moaning mess, breathing hard, trying to hide your moans in your hand as your second orgasm quickly approached.

“Kihyun I’m c-close I can’t hold it any longer.”

“I know baby I can feel you, just let go and make sure the whole restaurant can hear your mine.”

Arguably not the best idea but right now that didn’t matter, nothing mattered. He grabbed your waist to hold you in place as he pounded into you mercilessly. You reached your orgasm seconds later, clenching erratically around his length, pushing him over the edge as well. You kept your moans and curses as quiet as possible without your hands, since you needed them to grab the counter firmly. Kihyun rode both of your highs out and then pulled out. Both of you were completely out of breath, looking exactly how you’d luck after you just fucked in the bathroom. You grabbed some paper towels to clean yourself up.

“We should probably hurry and get back before they worry about us.”

No shit Kihyun, you were the one that wanted to fuck in here.”

“You loved it babe.”

“I know.”

You grumbled as you both fixed your hair a bit and headed out of the bathroom. Kihyuns mum asked you if you were now feeling better and you agreed thanking them for their understanding. You had a feeling they knew what was going on but at least had the decency not to mention it…and also the kindness to not find it impolite. If all they seemed slightly amused.

“Sorry but our dessert came when you two were gone.”

Kihyun smiled in your direction as he grabbed your coat.

“Oh don’t worry mum, I’ll just get mine at home.”