i almost going to say

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I dunno but listen to this song (x)  & tumbls kills the quality pls click

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anonymous asked:

May I ask you something that's not so much in Mor's favor? Don't you think that she should have told Az that she doesn't want him that way? She didn't need t come out to him in order to do that. Another reason to add how this whole plot was done horribly. It made her seem.. Not a great friend. She also said that she likes things the way they are to Feyre, she doesn't want to change things, it's comfortable for her (Az, her, Cass thing). I just.. Wish that all of this is different completely.

Right *rubs temples* we have finally reached a point I have been struggling with with this whole Mor…fiasco which is the tension between my desire to drag sjm through the mud for the way this was written…but also my intense desire to protect Mor’s choices as a queer character having agency with her own identity. This ask is going to be dedicated entirely to the latter (okay maybe not ENTIRELY but when I’m talking about  how Mor acted I’m going to do it in such a way that’s just ‘I wish all of this hasn’t happened how it did but it has and I’m working with what I’ve got here’) Clunky disclaimer out the way, let’s pick this apart… 

Right, first off,I would like to point out that it’s canon that Mor did actually try to talk to Azriel about this after he found her in the Autumn Court. However he wasn’t really listening and was doing some babble-confessing of his own at the time and she panicked. She was seventeen years old and the boy who just saved her life, who she knew she couldn’t be with, tried to tell  her that he loved her and she had no idea what to do so she panicked. After that it’s not really surprising she struggled with trying to explain things to him. 

Then  I think it’s important to remember a lot of things about the dynamic between Mor, Cass, Rhys and Az early on in the series when she knew Az and might have told him. So she’s only known Cassian and Azriel for two weeks when the whole Incident happens. The situation Mor is in is a  hell of a lot more complicated than ‘I slept with this one dude and this other dude loves me but I’m queer I’m not sure how to tell him’ (which is complicated enough in itself) 

Mor owes her life to all three of them at this point. Azriel saved her from the Autumn Court. Cassian and Rhys got her out of the Court of Nightmares and then proceeded to keep her out. So not is she indebted to them for saving her she is also completely reliant on them for her freedom. At this point in the canon we’re dealing with an extremely vulnerable queer girl who has been brutalised beyond belief and has only just been able to get out of her abusive situation. If the relationship she has with Cass Az and Rhys deteriorates she has nowhere else to go but back to her emotionally abusive homophobic family. 

Factor into that that she’s recently had sex with Cassian, largely because of Az and his jealousy over the two of them, and then walked away from that and the fact that she knows Azriel is in love with her but that she can’t reciprocate…I’m not surprised she’s terrified of telling them the truth. She’s grown up being told people like her are selfish and awful and that they should be forced into marriage and breeding regardless of how they feel about it, she probably believes that’s how Az and Cassian definitely, since she’s only known them about 3 weeks, will react to her. And Rhys grew up with them, they’re his brothers, she’s probably petrified of telling them the truth about her and having them all reject and abandon her which leaves her with nowhere to go but back to her father. I don’t blame her for not telling them. 

Then the War happens and she’s away from them all for a while and falls in love with Andromache and she has to go through losing her (twice) completely alone because no-one knows and she can’t tell t hem. She says herself that there was no-one for a few decades and like..Those aren’t circumstances where I’d feel like adding a whole  heaping pile of angst on top when she still isn’t sure how the boys will react so she just bottles things up and hides them away again. 

And then…Things settle out a little bit. The dynamic between her and Cass and Az finds something like what we see now, the three of them all tied together and loving each other just in different ways. And then she has to start trying to accept herself (Andromache was her first female lover and after that fell apart Mor was alone for decades, it’s hard to talk to people about something you barely understand or accept yourself) 

She has to unlearn the vile homophobia that she grew up with, she has to coax herself into trying to be with a woman again after what happened before, she has to try and explore this part of herself without letting anyone know…That’s hard. And so she finds Velaris, she finds Rita’s and at last she has a little safe place, a place where she experiment and be herself and so she does.  But that’s a safe place, a place that’s just hers, a thing that’s just hers, that no-one has yet managed to take away from her or destroy, and she feels this desperate urge to keep it safe because it’s all that’s kept her from breaking at times, knowing that no-one has ever truly known her

All of this takes time. Mor is healing and I know she’s a strong, confident woman when we meet her in ACOMAF and she’s had while to process all of this but…Abuse and that sort of homophobia and the trauma she was subjected to on top of then losing the only person she’s ever truly loved…That takes a lot of healing, that takes a lot of time to slowly build up an identity and a self-worth and by the time that happens…She needs the people around her. She has a support system in place and she deeply loves all of them. 

If she suddenly reveals that she’s queer that’s going to mess up her relationship with everyone in the Circle (except, perhaps, Amren) But everything will change and she’s only just managed to find herself and a place where she belongs and she has NEVER had that before. Cassian and Azriel both had difficult childhoods but they also both had Rhys and Rhys’ mother. Mor has not had a single positive, mutual, respectful relationship before Rhys, Cassian, Azriel and Amren. That is so fucking important for her recovery and her stability and I cannot find it in myself to shame her or hate her for wanting to keep that whole. 

Not to mention the fact that she knows this will hurt Azriel. And she loves him. I don’t care what bullshit that coming out scene spouts about her not being able to love him ‘the way he deserves’ because of her sexuality (which I have issues with) because she loves this man in a very deep, unconditional way and this will hurt him and she can’t bear that. 

So there are a lot of pressures surrounding her keeping her sexuality hidden. She’s petrified of her family, of the homophobia she grew up surrounded by and she wants to keep this one tiny piece of herself hidden from them, so they never truly know her and therefore can’t own or break her. She’s petrified of losing the Circle, who she owes her life, freedom, power and stability to, they’re her support system and the only truly positive relationships she’s ever known. of course she’s terrified of losing that? And she’s scared of hurting Azriel and wrecking her relationship with someone that she truly and genuinely loves, even if she doesn’t want to be with him romantically. 

Also I think, when you mention that she didn’t have to come out to explain things to Azriel I think….In this case it’s complicated by them? She’s already walked away from him once while he was trying to tell her that he loved her…If she just goes to him and tells him that she can never ever be with him without the context of her sexuality…That’s going to ruin him? And she knows that. She knows how he sees himself and she’s probably terrified of offering up that rejection because the Circle is Az’s safe space and support network too and she loves him. She cannot just say ‘I don’t want you, I never will’ because then it will just…sound like he’s not good enough for her and he never will be? It’s going to sound like a ‘him’ problem than it just being the way that she is and she knows that would shatter him. (You can argue all you like that this is an Azriel problem and it’s not on her to fix or attend to his insecurities, and it’s not, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for her to just shatter him like that? This is the reality of their situation) 

Also, on the subject of her not wanting to change it…I want to make it clear that I don’t think this is actively good for her. Like, I’m sorry, but if you think that Azriel, a straight man, is suffering more for Mor not feeling like she’s able to come out, feeling ‘petrified’ of facing him with this, than she is…I don’t know what to say to you. 

Being closeted is not fun. It’s not a little ‘straight passing’ card that you get to wave around so you can blend in with the normal people and not get noticed, it’s hard. It’s painful. It’s frightening. It’s constantly having to censor yourself whenever you’re talking to people, constantly worrying if they’ve figured it out even though you’re not ready, this constant paranoia and this guilt that builds up and the frustration and the hurt at not being able to be yourself. 

This situation is harming more exponentially more than it is Az and when she says that she doesn’t want it to change that’s not her being selfish. at all. 

(Especially when, as Mor told us herself in ACOMAF, she could peel her clothes off in front of Azriel and he wouldn’t move. He isn’t ready for this relationship anyway. He could have gone to her as well at any point in these 500 years and approached her about this and he hasn’t. Mor is not the only one maintaining this stasis between them and telling herself it’s ‘good enough’ this thing is mutual. 

Azriel isn’t technically losing out on anything by this because he hasn’t tried to make a move or talk to her about it and isn’t ready for the relationship himself? Maybe he could have moved on if she’d given him a concrete no but like…After five hundred years…He could have damn well just decided to move on for himself, like I’m sorry. A man should not need a flat out rejection from a woman (which, you could argue that he’d gotten when she walked away from him when he told her he loved her) to move on with his life, okay. 

He could have made that choice for himself she is not stopping him making that choice and she is not ‘stringing him along’ either, she isn’t hinting that oh maybe some day this might happen, not today but maybe tomorrow, she’s avoiding the subject and she has Cassian buffer them ffs to try and protect her from this. That’s not stringing him along, like, sorry) 

“Whenever Azriel makes his feelings clear, like he did with Eris … It’s stupid, I know. It’s so stupid and cruel that I do this, but … I slept with Helion just to remind Azriel … Gods, I can’t even say it. It sounds even worse saying it.”

“To remind him that you’re not interested.”

“I should tell him. I need to tell him. Mother above, after last night, I should. But …” She twisted her mass of golden hair over a shoulder. “It’s gone on for so long. So long. I’m petrified to face him—to tell him he’s spent five hundred years pining for someone and something that won’t ever exist. The potential fallout … I like things the way they are. Even if I can’t … can’t really be me, I … things are good enough.

Right, regardless of how you personally view Mor’s sexuality (bi/gay/queer/whatever you wish) the fact of the matter is that, in canon, Feyre states THREE TIMES that Mor did not enjoy sleeping with Helion and that she got no pleasure out of it. She’s described as ‘pale and vacant’ the next day and during the coming out scene Feyre actually thinks of her as looking ‘tortured’ okay, she is not enjoying this. The fact of the matter is, Mor is repeatedly having sex with men…For Az. To keep him at a distance. This is…Like I’m sorry but if you can’t see how fucked up that is (for HER) I don’t know what to say to you. She’s repeatedly putting herself in sexual situations she may or may not want that she does not seem to enjoy…For Azriel. 

She is suffering here, okay. She is closeted, that’s painful, that’s hard in itself but she also has this to deal with. Azriel’s affection has kept her closeted (in part) all these years and she is PETRIFIED of facing him with this?? How can this possibly be purely selfish on her part? How is she the only one getting flack for doing what she needs to do to keep herself safe

Especially when it’s hurting her like? ‘Good enough’ it’s just..It’s like Lucien’s situation in the Spring Court. That was ‘good enough’ for him, yes he was being abused  horrendously, no he didn’t have any real agency or power over himself or freedom or love or respect but it wasn’t the abusive shithole he was trapped in all those years so it was ‘good enough’. 

That’s what this good enough is, okay. She cannot be herself. She cannot openly love who she wants to. She has to suffer heartache and grief alone and isolated because she can’t tell anyone how she feels. She is ‘petrified’ of facing Azriel. She is closeted and that hurts. She is also GUILTY AS FUCK. She’s doing all of this, hiding herself, hurting herself, sleeping with people she doesn’t get any pleasure out of, and has been doing this for five  hundred years and she still feels horrifically guilty about this. She’s said in that coming out scene too that she wants to be able to love Azriel the way he deserves but she can’t. She’s tried to change herself and has hidden herself and hurt herself all for this relationship that she doesn’t want, that makes her uncomfortable? 

She likes things the way that they are  because these are the first people who accepted even a part of her. They love her and they respect her and they treat her with dignity and gave her basic fucking needs from a relationship and that is ‘good enough’ for her. Because she grew up with emotionally and physically abusive homophobic parents who accepted no part of her, who treated her like an animal, or worse, and then she found this…She found this love and respect and of course she doesn’t want to change it. Of course she doesn’t want to lose it. Of course she’s terrified of telling them and seeing that same hatred that lived in her parents’ eyes. Even if she knows it’s irrational that doesn’t matter. She’s a terrified queer abuse victim and she is suffering, she cannot be herself, but that’s good enough because what choice does she have, really? 

Mor is a closeted, scared, vulnerable, abuse survivor who is petrified of losing the only safe space that she’s ever had just because of who she is. She is suffering 100 times more from this situation than Azriel or anyone else in the Circle. I will not sit here and call a queer character selfish or a bad friend or any of it for doing what she feels she has to to protect herself. Especially not when most of the things that she’s doing are more damaging for her than they are for anyone else. I love Azriel, I relate to his character a lot, but I’m not going to sit here and prop up this ‘oh no poor boy’ while Mor gets thrown under the bus because she is afraid. 

Her identity is her own and this choice, revealing this part of herself to who she chooses, is one of the only pieces of ultimate agency that she has ever had. I won’t say she was wrong to keep it hidden, keep it safe, if that made her feel okay. Mor’s situation is not ‘good enough’, Mor’s situation is deplorable and painful and I refuse to call her selfish for maintaining something like this because she is absolutely terrified of the alternative. 

Queer people have the right to be in the closet for as long as they need to be in order to feel safe. It is not for anyone else (especially not straight characters a la Feyre) to tell them when they should come out. They are not ‘liars’ for being closeted. They should not feel guilty for being closeted and keeping themselves safe. That’s a disgusting way of looking at things and it’s an incredibly damaging mentality to have. 

‘Out and proud’ is great, okay, but it’s not possible for everyone. A queer person’s safety comes first and if they feel that they need to keep their sexuality hidden in order to do so that is their choice. And it is not up to anyone, especially those who have no way of understanding what this feels like, to judge them or shame them or guilt-trip for that. It’s not selfish to want to protect yourself and not risk ruining the relationships you have with those around you for the sake of telling them something they do not have a right to know unless you choose it. 

In the end I will chose validating and defending a queer person’s decision to keep their identity hidden for their own personal reasons and safety over the feelings of anyone who feels like they might have been entitled to know this every. Single. Fucking. Time. 

Remember when Abby caught her son drinkin whiskey and literally called him by his full name, like let this momma rest pls Andrew she’s got 9+ babies to look after,, she can’t always be watchin you

etsy.com
Riddler Trophy, Batman Arkham City [FAN ART]
Riddle me this! Tear one off and scratch my head, what once was red is black instead. Presenting... Riddlers question mark trophy from the Batman Arkham City! Nothing short of awesome as a night light or desk piece, shining quite bright and running off two AA batteries its the perfect choice for any Riddler fan. AC adapter option is now available as well. Contact me for more details! Please note this is not an official Arkham City prop. Design sourced from thingiverse, created by user:NAPPY

If you can’t get the originals, this is a pretty faithful 3D-printed reproduction.  Bonus: they’re made in Canada!

anonymous asked:

if this question isn't too personal, how's your relationship with your parents?

tbh i’m lucky enough to have gr8 parents and a good relationship w them??? they’re honestly great, i mean we do fight or piss eachother off sometimes but that happens, overall they’re really great 

i also love to annoy them sometimes by doing this thing that if one of them does a nice thing to eachother like my dad makes my mom tea im like ‘’oooOOOO dad??? you made tea for mom ;)))))) do u have a crush on her or smth????? oh wait?? am i hearing wedding bells??? and they both turn into embarrassed teenagers like ‘’sHHH JULIA why are you liKE THIS’’ and im just >:’)))

I did a thing!

So, I hit 1000 followers almost two weeks ago now.  I was going make some custom content to say thank you, and since it is pride month I wanted it to be pride related.

So, I made pride banners!  


~ There are three swatches

~ Get Together is needed, sorry. 

~ If you use these in your game can you please tag me :)


Download here

anyone wanna talk abt how nina and kuwei absolutely remain close friends to this day and visit each other in ravka regularly because i know in my heart this is true

  • nina gets what it’s like to be on your own in a foreign country trying to accomplish a seemingly-impossible task, and having her check in every so often is a huge help for kuwei settling into his new life there
  • they’re the most multilingual of all their friends and bond over this.  nina doesn’t get many opportunities to practice shu even though she speaks it fluently, and although kuwei speaks passable ravkan, he improves a lot faster from speaking to nina without the added pressure of having to do anything other than talk.
  • both of them religiously pick up bits of gossip and remember all of it and have at least an hour sharing all of it every time they meet (mostly nina.  kuwei likes keeping things to himself so he can use it if he ever has to.  but sometimes he’ll tell her something and nina’s eyes go wide because there’s no way kuwei should know that.)  between the two of them, they know what’s going on with everyone at any given time and have also been known to discuss this in earshot of whoever they’re talking about by switching languages so nobody can prove it
  • when inej comes to visit nina, the three of them go for waffles.  afterwards, inej and nina take turns teaching each other the rowdiest sea shanties they know and kuwei looks on with a mixture of confusion, amusement, and horror, because neither of them can carry a tune and there are some lyrics he wishes he didn’t understand.  (he’s totally memorising them for later, though.)  they’re so happy and enthusiastic about it that after a while it’s hard not to give up and laugh
  • both of them also know what it’s like to lose someone you care about and to have to move on and make a life for yourself regardless.  it’s not something either of them talks about a lot but sometimes, a good number of years in the future, they will.  nina tells him about matthias, about the future they were going to make together and how they were going to change the world.  the work she’s still trying to do on her own.  the promise she made to try and help the younger drüskelle who could become something more, like matthias did.  kuwei doesn’t need to say a lot to that, mostly just listens, but he’s seen how much nina’s accomplished in the years since the ice court job and matthias’ death and all of the good she’s done.  
  • he especially doesn’t have a lot to say about his life before fjerda and ketterdam, not a lot of it is things he wants to remember, but he was close with his father even if their relationship wasn’t perfect and sometimes there’s something to say about that.  about how it might have been better for the world if it was his father who survived shu han, how kuwei could have done something to help them escape if it wouldn’t have exposed him as a grisha to the fjerdans.  i could have brought matthias back, nina says quietly.  i almost did.  sometimes letting go is better.  
  • the potential with these two is honestly so underrated and i feel like we as people need to talk about it more

bonus:

  • nina: wake up, i have a huuuuge dilemma i need your opinion on!  
  • kuwei: what?  
  • nina: am i more beautiful today than i was yesterday?  i mean at first i looked in the mirror and i thought well, yes, definitely, huge improvement–  
  • kuwei: can i have my pillow back?  
  • nina: –but then i thought maybe it’s not that i’m more beautiful today, maybe i was just as beautiful yesterday but i lacked the self-esteem to recognise it!  
  • kuwei: don’t take this personally but get out

Dave….Dave plz come back on and tell us tomorrow that we will have two or three more seasons…plz…

Protective Tony x reader - part 2

A/N: Part 2 to “Protective Tony x reader” has finally arrive!!!!!!!

Warnings: Graphic descriptions and images of sex/sexual activities.


“Tony! Tony wait up!” I jog after him in the hallway.

“What the hell was that back there?” I pant out, once I’ve finally reached him.

 Tony sighs, turning around and looking at me.

Originally posted by kara-zorel

“You’re my friend Y/N, I was just protecting you from Montgomery, that’s all.” He says. I look down, slightly in disappointment. Of course he’s just protecting me from Montgomery. That’s what friends do right? A little part of me wishes there was another reason behind why Tony acted the way he did in the cafeteria, but I know that the possibility is highly unlikely. 

Keep reading

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1x04 | 1x05

It’s almost as if she just wants to go to the gym

As Writers…

We are entitled to write whatever we artistically choose to write on our blogs. It’s not to satisfy the masses - it’s to satisfy our creative self and as readers we can choose to appreciate that lens or not.

It does not reflect who we are as humans and writers are not bad people for choosing to write an opinion that is different from your own

If you don’t like what I post on my blog please just unfollow me. I don’t need that negative energy or hate in my life

So I was thinking about that Lindworm Zarcray Au but like in a more modern setting.

Yusho and Yoko have two sons Zarc and Yuya, with Zarc being the oldest by about five to ten years.

Yuya and Yuzu are childhood sweethearts and when they turn eighteen they want to get married.

But Zarc is a loser who lives in the basement of their house and hasn’t gotten married yet.

As per Sakaki family tradition Yuya can’t marry Yuzu until Zarc gets married.

Yuya tries setting up his big bro but it never works - Zarc always drives the girls away or creeps them out with his dragon obsession. And Yuya starts to believe that it’s hopeless and starts to give up.

Then one day Reiji (he, Himika and Reira are family friends) says that his father Leo is coming back to town and is bringing his half-sister Ray.

Both families have dinner together since Yusho and Leo are old time friends.

Zarc is being obnoxious at the dinner and after some time Ray has had ENOUGH and she blows up at Zarc.

The two get into an argument but Yuya notices that while they’re shouting at each other they keep saying stuff like “WHY ARE YOU SO ATTRACTIVE BUT DUMB AS BRICKS??” “WHY DO YOU HAVE THE BODY OF AN ANGEL BUT ARE SUCH A BITCH???”

And Yuya is like “omg, I got to set these two up so I can finally marry Yuzu.”

So cue matchmakers Yuya and Yuzu (and occasional Reiji and Reira) trying to get the two most stubborn people in all of Maimi City to date each other (possibly with a time limit until Leo has to leave).

Also later when they ‘hook up’ Zarc is embarrassed and doesn’t know what to do and his like, “Wanna see my dragon collection?”

And Ray just starts to unzip his jacket and says “I’d rather see YOUR dragon.”

And Zarc just eeps.

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Orangie Sungjong Aesthetic 

(Thanks to @soooldout for tagging me)