i aint here for a long time

anonymous asked:

My theory - Chad and Hayley are probs taking a break but not making it public because it's not over yet, Hayley feels like she has a commitment to stay in the relationship bc they've been together so long, the tattoo, married, public image etc. so while on tour now this is the break and they're still friends but having time apart to have a breather. I think she feels locked into the relationship in a way but she does act flirty with Tyler....or idk maybe that's just me

this theory 👀👀 i am here for it…… and lbr you aint the only one who thinks she acts kinda flirty with taylor (esp during london show jfc)


Originally posted by shut-up-bitch-you-confuse-me

(I waited like a whole year to actually use this gif lol)

I call this a party. Let´s party gang.

@someonebeatmetotheurl @shit-happens-bitchachos @cascancook @balou200 @trisscar368 @coffeeandlazyweekend @wildtendermythologia @snovolovac @mancamonster @moostache @i-forgot-adam @suzie-aint-here @sabriel-fanboy-83 @mysongsknowwhatyoudidthere @melonhedgehog @hiiraxeth @fangirl-in-flannel @loufworld @music-x-freak @whovianamazonwarriorprincess @littlesasquatch @carry-on-you-wayward-winchesters @bellascooby24 @funnycas @caitisaddicted @ohmygoshwirt @cryingtitan @geekself @a-bit-of-space @sociopathicgeek

that´s all folks i could think of

if you´re not on there, don´t be sad, I didn´t want to make this post ridiculously long on my own :) it´s supposed to be team effort xD let´s party till the… you know what, no time restrictions


Hur hur hur @the-devils-beast hahah here it is…i refuse to color it..maybe one day. (So proud of how Zeb came out though!)

Shout out to @kabaszo cuz i remember them doing the fulcrum tattoo on Kallus too.

Kanato + Crepes


–> Anyways this is from Diabolik Lovers Lost Eden and these pics are NOT mine they are from BRE-LLA ‘s post ( i linked it so no credit for me here , they aren’t mine ! ) she didn’t write down the translation but Kanato made me go AWWW so i had to ok *guilty*

Kanato : Hey . Share one bite of your crepes please .

Yui : Of course . Here,Kanato-kun .

Kanato : ….No . Somehow I thought I was very happy after a long time .

Took me long enough to get this done, however here it is; it’s nearly two years, I made quin back in 2015 when Into the Badlands first came out. Of course he was automatically the most hated character on the show but I loved the character and boom, here we are. Now see, I get that it’s been two years and this is the first time I’ve hit 100 with this blog but ayyyyye, this aint no popularity contest. I’ve had a lot of ups and downs with this blog but finally there are people who actually like Quinn and are willing to give him the time of day. Any who, wow, two years lol. Well almost two but I’m calling it two, November is the officially two year mark but this is close enough. So here we go.

First off, I want to say and give a shout out to two of my best friends.

@lxstpriestess @superintcndent, Jackie and Jess, you two have been the most supportive individuals since I met y’all.

Jackie, dude it’s been freaking almost 4 years now since we first started talking and wow we have been through a lot together ic and irl lol.

Jess, dude we are coming up on two years of writing together quick, I can’t believe it’s been this long already and I wouldn’t change any of it for the world. I have much love and respect for both of you.

Secondly, I have to give a shout out to a few more people;

@innocentmanwithabounty , Rose, it’s been quite a few years of us writing together and you have jumped with me from muse to muse and each time it’s been an amazing mix of threads.  I wouldn’t change any of it for the world.

@drdumaurier , Bee omg dude you’re writing is inspiring and I love our threads together, whether here or on Javi, we always have epic plotting sessions and excitement over little details, I love it all!

@handcfhealing , Krys, I know we just started writing with one another but our threads are epic af. I love our greek myth AU, it’s perfect and literally I have been after this AU for so long and your writing is just awesome!

Now on to the follow forever!

@zwhacking, @etherbled, @guardianschaffa, @aithreachas, @acxlyte, @bullshitthinking, @hallowedbethyname, @maskedambition, @sardonicbeauty, @stygiicn, @tobewhoimnot,

Klance Week Day 2 - Sacrifice

So I haven’t written in a long while but I thought why the heck not get back into it now? So here:

He’s seen it time and time again, and he never forgets to thank what ever higher being may exist that he is lucky enough to have such an amazing partner. 

It was moments like this that Lance remembers. When Keith turned to give him that soft smile, the one only Lance gets to see. When they communicate without words, always in sync with each other. Those seconds mid-battle when Lance’s gaze drifts to Keith, and he sees the intensity in his eyes, the swiftness of his movements.

It’s those kind of moments that remind him of how much he loves Keith. Of how this whirlwind of a boy caught him up in his gravity, and now Lance’s world spins around him. It reminds him of the reassurement of being by his side, the almost overbearing feeling of loving him, of being loved.

It draws him back to the times the homesickness catches up to him and crashes down, but Keith is always there to pick up, to comfort him and be his home away from home. It reminds him that Keith is home, and that home would mean nothing now that he has him.

It’s in these moments that Lance remembers how much he loves Keith. How who he once thought of as an annoying rival is now his partner, and an irreplaceable part of him. It cements the fact that Lance would do anything for him, die for him, which he almost has on occasion. But it’s worth it to Lance; sacrificing himself for the love of his life is something he’d never regret, and something he would do a million times over.  Luckily for him, he still has a million more opportunities. And so does Keith, who while he hates that Lance would give up his life to save his, will do, and does the exact same thing back.

ao3 link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10937904

Fairy Tail: Book Of Darkness - Book 2, Flames Chapter 1

AN: This is a story I’ve been working on for a long time, had a long break from it. It is finished and has been for a long time so if it does look familiar it’s because its a editied version of something I posted on my recently deleted tumblr account. This is ‘Part 2′ of this long tale and it something I wrote just after chapter 436 was published. It’s kinda angsty and some ship stuff (although not much cause I aint about that forced life bro) anyway please check it out currently there are a total of 7 chapters published and would be great if you could leave some feedback too!

Link for the full thing is here >> https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12188840/1/Fairy-Tail-Books-of-Darkness

Is a little mature in parts so read with caution
Some nalu stuff happening in places (not to heavy though)

Natsu was here, breathing and he even went away to train so he could protect them. Natsu was a member of Fairy Tail. He was family. Zeref wasn’t taking that away from them.


Flames, 1

Everything’s going to be okay.
Do you trust me…Natsu?
Natsu stay with me. You’re okay. I promise.
“NATSU!” The boy jolted up from his slumber to see an angry Lucy stood before him.
Sheepishly, he rubbed his eyes, “Luuuccce, I was sleeping.” He groaned.
“Yeah, in MY bed!” She gave the obvious response, followed by throwing the bed sheets off and Natsu with them.
“Why do I need to get up now, it’s so early?”
“Well. YOU kept me awake with your damn snoring, it’s only fair. Besides, Erza wants us to go on a- Job.” She hesitated with the term, because it wasn’t a typical guild job and they wouldn’t be getting any pay for it.
Natsu sighed. He knew what she meant. She meant they were going to do more research on Zeref. Natsu got his memory back, but only briefly, he collapsed one day and woke up a few days later not remembering. The worst part is, is he couldn’t bring himself to talk about it, which everyone respected. They soon regretted that, since now they had backtracked.

On the other hand, the guild was back. The Master had been in the great Empire, Alvarez, to prevent potential war. Yet, the effort may have only spurred war further.
Zeref is their ruler and the Spriggan 12 are almost godly in power.
With all that in mind Erza finally decided that they had to tell its core members everything (Only the ones most willing and loyal to the guild). Including the part about Natsu being E.N.D. It was hard to take in, but there was a reason they stood by all this time, they were family.
Fortunately, Levy and Gajeel working under the council paid off. Levy had done research leading her to the discovery of the Dragneel family. She wanted to rid the pieces of the information, to prevent anyone else from finding out, but not too much that someone would suspect or notice missing files and books. Agreeably they didn’t want to jump to conclusions over Natsu, they knew the years they’d spent with him wasn’t a lie. Selling him out was defiantly out of the question.
Neither of them went into great detail over the findings. There wasn’t a need to stir any emotions, more than they already had. There were many lose ends, finding exactly what they wanted wouldn’t be easy. If it were, the council would have had Natsu’s head a long time ago.
“I think this mess goes back much further than Zeref.” Levy concluded.
“Huh? Really, I mean I guess as far as war is concerned, probably. But, it sounds like you mean a different kind of mess.” Lucy responded.
“Once I found out about Natsu. I tried to dig deeper. Like I said there was too many lose ends. Like, it just begins from Zeref’s work on the R-Systems and Eclipse. Then jumps to the curse and his demons. Then it just- stops. The last thing mentioned is the birth of the Tartarus 400 years ago then jumps again about 300 years to the Spriggan 12. I mean aside from records of replacements. There’s nothing.” She finished in a confused tone.
   “That does seem strange. But, in a way it makes sense.” Makarov spoke solemnly.
‘Why gramps?’ Gray asked.
Levy interjected, “Because if I found it, I’m sure someone else did the same and like me, they’ve tampered with it when they finished.” She sighed, “Only it seems what they deemed to be worth hiding was different to me. I wanted to hide anything that tied Natsu to it. But, these lose ends go outside that. Meaning someone was onto something. Something real.”
“So we might have a problem.’ Natsu interrupted, ‘Not that I can’t handle myself or anything” he mumbled hoping no one heard him.
Levy smiled, “The war between Ishgal and Alvarez goes much further back. Like a couple of hundred years before Zeref. I found documents listing all of the Fiore soldier squadrons from 400 years ago.” Her tone became serious, “They were all dragon slayers. Sadly I can tell it’s been heavily tampered with. But I managed find something involving one of the soldiers. I couldn’t find a name.” She paused.
“So what was important about this, they killed a dragon or something?” Cana spoke up, hugging her barrel of Ale looking sceptical.
“It was the beginning of the black dragon. They actually celebrated. He could have changed the course of the war. Well he did. Just not the way they hoped. This was all before Zeref was even born.” She stopped.
They could work out the rest of what she was implying. The black mage really didn’t have anything to do with Acnologia.  The name put everyone at unease. Even more so if he could turn into a human whenever he pleased. He could be right here and they wouldn’t know, until it’s too late.
Levy glanced at Natsu, he was beside himself, despite trying to put on a brave face. She could tell it was hurting him. Especially since he had the information but then resorted back to having amnesia.
“There was one more piece. I’m not sure what it meant exactly. The only book I could find was written in something that I’m not even sure is a language. I could maybe translate the title.” Her speech slowed as it bothered her that she couldn’t figure out the language out.
“Do what you can” Erza reassured.
“Yeah. Even though I haven’t the slightest clue how to decipher it.”
‘I’M SURE YOU CAN DO IT LEVY-SAN!’ Jet and Droy shouted behind her, in their ever-so-supportive-way.
“Whatever it is, I think it’s a story judging from the formatting. It almost looks like a children’s book, an old one mind you. Hmm.” She studied what appeared to be the title for a while, “The Burning Girl” She pondered.

“AH! Pieces! That’s all I have! PIECES!” Lucy shouted, causing Natsu and Happy to fully be awake and alert if they weren’t already.
“Calm down, it’s better than nothing. We’ll find something.” Gray also startled by the break of silence.
Lucy slammed her head onto the table, causing sheets of paper to flutter onto the floor.
“We’ve been at this for hours” she moaned, “Still. Nothing. I hope Levy is getting somewhere with that book.” Lucy mumbled with her forehead pressed against the table.
She turned her head to the side and looked at Natsu, who was trying to prevent himself from falling asleep in Lucy’s bed, research wasn’t his strong point. How in the hell he ran a guild, a demon one at that, was beyond them.
“Are you sure you can’t remember anything? Maybe dreams or something?” Happy intervened.
“If I could I would have told you.” Natsu sighed with a sense of guilt. “Trust me it’s painful watching you all right now.’
“I’d have to agree with flame brain on that one. We’re getting nowhere, and I think we’re all starting to get tired. Maybe we should take a break. And I don’t mean for a few hours. Maybe we could get some sleep then take a job. Clear our heads.” Gray suggested.
“You’re right. A few days could do us good. Now that I think about it my rents nearly due, I could do with some money right now.” Lucy gave a cringe-like smile at the thought of the old hag demanding her money, that woman would never forget.
“So it’s settled. We’ll get some sleep then take a job for a few days. Hopefully we might achieve something after that. And maybe Wendy and Carla can help us too when they’ve finished on their job” Ezra ex-quipped into a bath towel. It seemed she’d already decided to sleep at Lucy’s. Of course the blonde was used to it now.

Wake up.
Can you hear me?
It’s okay I’m right here, I’m not leaving.
Stay with me.
Natsu jolted himself awake. He was on the train heading back to Magnolia from the job they’d taken. It was a simple job. Take out some bandits on the outskirts of a village, but of course, they may have caused more damage to the village than the bandits ever did. It was Fairy Tail after all. Even the villagers expected that much. They still got their reward and helped rebuild some of the houses they destroyed, so they took a day or two longer than planned. But that gave Levy more time. Overall, it may have been for the better.
   Next to Natsu was a sick and sleeping Wendy. He felt bad, since the dragons had gone Wendy got motion sickness too, but the small mage insisted she’d cast troia on Natsu. He tried to convince her he’d be fine. But she’d already done her work.
It made him a little sad too. It made him think that Grandeeney cast troia on her. The fact that Wendy got sick reminded him that they’d really left this time. The dragons were gone. But, he’d believe that they were still watching from afar. That thought helped him through it all.
Opposite him was Gray, who’d noticed Natsu’s sudden awake and gave him a concerned glance.
Natsu looked at him, then swiftly turned his head to look out the window. He knew what Gray was about to ask, “I’m fine” he muttered.
Of course Gray wasn’t convinced, “Like I believe that. You had a bad dream didn’t you?”
   “Jeez, you make it sound like I’m a kid. I’m fine. Just tired.” He could feel the troia spell wearing off and they still had two more hours left. He hoped that he could hold out.
“You wanna talk about it?” Gray pushed on.
After everything that’s happened Gray had started to revert back to what he did when they were kids. Only now he didn’t have to sneak behind Natsu on a job. They were a team these days. Although he’s still have to start a fight to get answers out of him. Yet, Natsu looked tired and not in the mood for a fight. Wendy was still asleep and the others were getting some drinks from the small store on the train.
Gray was on his own with this one.
“I-It’s fine.” He repeated.
Gray became frustrated, “Natsu!” he wasn’t taking chances with this, believing that Natsu would tell them if he remembered anything. But, at the same time, despite his brave face, he could see Natsu was scared.
“I don’t remember okay. Like I don’t remember anything. Just drop it.” His tone changed. He knew he was having odd dreams, but he could never remember what they were when he woke up. It made him feel weak.
He ignored the request, “This isn’t new is it?” he may have been pushing Natsu too much and like Natsu said, he doesn’t know anything. But that didn’t matter, he wasn’t just some broken tool, he was family and Natsu still clearly needed some looking after.
“It doesn’t matter. I mean no it’s not. It’s just-” Natsu stuttered, he really was starting to feel tired, maybe he’d used his magic too much. That couldn’t be it could it? He was starting to become pale. Suddenly he found it difficult to keep his eyes open.
“Natsu?” Gray’s voice grew with worry.
He rested his head against the window and closed his eyes drifting off into a heavy sleep.
“Hey Natsu?!”
“Hey wake up!” Gray leant towards him and shook him gently.
Hey wake up!
Startled, Natsu sat up, realizing he was in a bed. When he looked around he suddenly noticed where he was. It’d been a while, but it hadn’t changed much.
It was Gray’s house.
“What th-”
Gray walked in, “Finally, you’re awake.” He sounded relieved.
“Ye-yeah. Why didn’t you just wake me? And why am I in your house?”
“I tried, we all did. Actually I wouldn’t say you fell asleep, you more- passed out. You’re here because Lucy’s place is filled with research, as is the guild.” Gray spoke.
“Heh. Am I that pathetic now.” Natsu mumbled to himself.
Gray looked at him, he didn’t look like Natsu anymore. He was falling apart, in fact the pink haired boy looked like he was going to break down into tears at any moment. He couldn’t take anymore, and knowing that he’s got everyone worried about him made him feel worse.
“You’re not pathetic Natsu. You’re the last person I should be reminding what family is. You don’t need to fight all the time you know. I’m not saying give up either.” He exasperated, “Just let us fight for you for a while. You’re handling this better than I would, but you’re pushing yourself too much.” Gray walked into the kitchen and begun making two cups of tea.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean-” Natsu was cut off with Lucy and Wendy storming through the front door.
“Natsu-san!” Wendy sounded overjoyed, running over to him and hugging him, “We were worried.”
“Oh calm down child. He’s only been asleep for a few hours.” Carla piped up behind her.
“I’m glad to see you finally woke up.” Lucy smiled.
Natsu looked down, “Sorry” He felt ashamed that he didn’t even have the ability to act himself anymore. He was tired, but not the kind that sleep can cure.
Lucy frowned, “Levy managed to decrypt book a little. But it seems to be in chapters and each chapter is a different language of sorts, so it’s going to take a while. But I’ve translated the first chapter here.” She said happily, changing the subject.
“Is it going to help us?” Gray asked.
“I’m not sure. If Levy’s right, we might end up with a real history lesson when we’re done. We might even be able to finally end all this. Yet, we need to know everything we can before jumping to conclusions.”  She paused to ponder, “As the title implied it’s about a girl, she seems to be unnamed. Although it states she was abandoned as a child and ended up in a travelling circus.” She paused. “I want to believe it will be like a children’s story and end happily, but stories from 400 years ago were often written from real events and they wanted children to learn from reality. Like the Key to the Starry Heavens.”
“So it won’t be happily ever after?” Natsu sighed, he was getting bored of this tragedy crap, “Damn I was in the mood for something happy.” Natsu spoke sarcastically. It wasn’t his appearance that made the others know he wasn’t okay, it was uncharismatic change of tone. “So, does it point to anywhere we can look?” he asked.
“Yeah, there’s a place it talks about. I think my mother told me about it before. I don’t know its full story though, only what’s written here. The girl was taken to be the Kings entertainer for years.” Lucy stated.
Wendy followed, “They prevented her from using any magic, yet they weren’t even sure if she could even use magic, and threw her in a giant bird cage of sorts. She had to put on a performance for the King and his rich subjects. The others looked into it and apparently it’s possible that such a place is located in Bosco.”
“Let me guess, we’re the ones going there?” Natsu frowned.
“AYE!” Happy flew in, with Erza strolling behind him. The blue cat then flew towards Natsu landing on his lap. He promised Natsu he wouldn’t worry about him and he’d always believe he’d be okay. Happy acting his normal way cheered him up a little, causing him to let out a small smile.
“We better get going then.” Erza settled.

One Piece aint One Piece anymore. I don’t fuck with you anymore Oda. Are you sure it still is a manga for children? Wow. At this point I’m only reading OP to see how much Oda’s gonna fuck up next. Damn if I wanted those low bad vibes I did read attack on titan. Where is OP at?

tagged by @pa-writes and @ct230r

1) rules: tag 9 people: yall already know i aint gonna do this

last song i listened to: i can never do these without listing like 80 songs bc i just rlly love music so here we go: body by mother mother (Big Mood tbh), rillo talk by wild child, quanti amori by gigi d’alessio, fear of the water my SYML, afterlife by XYLØ, happy little clouds by the surprisingly good PBS remix of bob ross talking, the good times are killing me by modest mouse, the mother we share by CHVRCHESwe are the hearts by EXGF, and uuuh this one playlist

last book you read/listened to: read? during this mental health downswing? i dont think so

favorite color: :Y

top three shows: :Y

top three characters: :Y

top three ships: :YYYY

2) rules: BOLD the statements that are true for you!

I am 5'7” or taller
I wear glasses
I have at least one tattoo
I have at least one piercing
I have blonde hair
I have brown eyes
I have short hair
My abs are at least somewhat defined
I have or have had braces

I love meeting new people
People tell me that I’m funny
Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me

I enjoy physical challenges
I enjoy mental challenges
I’m playfully rude with people I know well
I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it
There is something I would change about my personality

I can sing well
I can play an instrument
I can do over 30 pushups without stopping
I’m a fast runner
I can draw well
I have a good memory
I’m good at doing math in my head
I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute
I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling
I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch
I know how to throw a proper punch

I enjoy playing sports
I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else
I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else
I have learned a new song in the past week (its this one)
I work out at least once a week
I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months
I have drawn something in the past month
I enjoy writing
I do or have done martial arts

I have had my first kiss
I have had alcohol

I have scored the winning goal in a sports game
I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting
I have been at an overnight event 
I have been in a taxi
I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year
I have beaten a video game in one day
I have visited another country
I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts

I’m in a relationship
I have a crush on a celebrity
I have a crush on someone I know
I have been in at least 3 relationships
I have never been in a relationship
I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them
I get crushes easily
I have had a crush on someone for over a year
I have been in a relationship for at least a year
I have had feelings for a friend

I have at least one person I consider a “best friend”
I live close to my school
My parents are still together
I have at least one sibling
I live in the united states
There is snow right now where I live
I have hung out with a friend in the past month
I have a smartphone
I have at least 15 CD’s
I share my room with someone

I have breakdanced
I know a person named Jamie
I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce 
I have dyed my hair
I’m listening to one song on repeat right now (its this one)
I have punched someone in the past week
I know someone who has gone to jail
I have broken a bone
I have eaten a waffle today
I know what I want to do with my life
I speak at least 2 languages
I have made a new friend in the past year (sierra is a gift)
I have been given flowers before (…probably?)



Looking at my sister laugh was really starting to irritate me, especially because we were in public so I couldn’t curse her ass out like I wanted to. If we weren’t in this damn nail salon she would’ve gotten told the hell off, I don’t find a damn thing funny.

It was bad enough I was out in the streets fighting like a wild damn banshee but now I’m on tape fighting like one. Just like I predicted somebody recorded the fight I had in New York and it got on World Star the very next morning. Talk about embarrassing.

Keep reading

‘I’m a writer and when it gets close to my deadlines I neglect taking care of myself so you’ll pop in my house every so often to make sure I’m doing okay’ AU

“No no NO!” Cas growls low in his throat, furiously pressing the backspace button in an effort to clear the offending words off the screen. It’s official, I cant write for shit. Sighing, Cas leans forward, putting his head in his hands. I may as well quit now while I’m ahead. 

4 weeks. 4 weeks is the deadline. To say that the book is almost ready, would be a complete and utter lie. Cas has written 18 chapters of a planned 24 chapter book. He planned it. He planned every chapter to a T. Yet somehow he managed to mess it up! In addition to the 6 chapters he’s yet to finish, there’s the editing and proof reading to be done. And obviously because Cas is so damned indecisive, he’d change things at the last minute, leaving no time at all to proof read again.

Cas’s eyes start to tear up at the thought. He’d worked so hard to get this far, he’d absolutely loath himself if he fails due to his own stupidity. This is the last book of the trilogy, it needs to go out with a bang. Maybe I need a bang… When was the last time he- oh right, when he started writing this god forsaken book. Cas had given up his social life (not that he had much of one to begin with). He’d given up everything to commit to being an author. His boyfriend at the time, Balthazar was less than impressed. Cas still winces at the names that had been thrown his way when they’d broken up. He couldn’t exactly blame Balthazar of course, it was his fault. Cas was the one who left, not Balth. Cas was the one who took their 3 years together and flushed it down the drain.

Reaching up to brush away the wetness from his cheeks, Cas sits back in his chair. God, he was such an awful person.

“Hey, how’s my buddy doin’!”

Cas groans. No, it’s not Monday yet is it? Dean’s not supposed to be here until Monday. He didn’t even hear the front door open. Sinking lower into his chair and planting his cheek of the cool wood of his desk, Cas bites his lip in an effort to control his emotions. He’s not crying in front of Dean. No way. He just needs to write this book then sleep forever.

“Cas?” Dean calls out from what Cas assumes is the kitchen. Much to Cas’ lack of enthusiasm on the idea, Dean always buys extra groceries just in case he’s too focused on his writing and hasn’t gotten out of the apartment. And no matter how many times Cas offers him money for the food, Dean brushes it off.

“Cas, man?” 

Oh god hes at the door. Maybe if I stay quiet hell think I’m not here.

“Cas, I know you’re there.”

Damn it. “Go away.” 

“I hate to break it to you J. K. Rowling but I aint leaving.”

“If only I could write half as good as her…” Cas grumbles under his breath, tears forming in his tired eyes once more.

A long silence follows and Cas hopes Dean left. He doesn’t need to be here. Its not like it could be fun for Dean, looking after a stupid, worthless piece of crap writer that cant tell what day it is if it was painted on the back of his hand.

“…I heard that.”

Cas shifts, putting his arms on the desk and places his forehead in the crook of his arm.

“I- I’m coming in okay?” 

Before Cas could protest, Dean’s opening the door. Light from the hallway illuminates the entire study and Cas buries his face in deeper, curling in on himself.

Dean sighs at the sight before him. Paper strewn everywhere, cups of coffee - with coffee still in them - have fallen over the desk to the hardwood floor. And there, in the middle of the room slumped over his desk is Cas. How did he manage to trash the entire room in 2 days? 


“Go away, Dean.”

“I just want–”

“NO! Okay.” Rising his head, Cas looks directly at Dean. “No, just leave me alone so I can get this done without losing my mind.”

“But Cas–”

“STOP! Just stop! I know I’m incapable of looking after myself. I know and at this point I don’t care. I haven’t got a speck of dust in my head let alone a brain, so don’t come in here and pretend that everything IS FUCKING ALRIGHT! Its not alright! You being here… makes it worse because you distract me. I hate looking like a dumbass amateur writer, who has the vocabulary of a 12 year old in front of you!”

Cas’ eyes widen as realisation hit him. Who he was talking to. “Oh my god…”

How could he say that? To Dean. The one person who’s stuck with him through his ups and downs? 

“Well…” Dean swallows around the lump in his throat, eyes downcast. How could Cas think of himself that way? “Just for the record, that’s not what I think of you at all. Far from it.”

Lowering his head, Cas let the tears fall silently while wringing his hands. He cant believe he said those things. He’s never raised his voice before. Dean strides over to where Cas sits, kneeling down to his level. Pulling him in close, Dean wraps his arms around broad shoulders. This was not what Dean had planned when he walked through his door but he couldn’t leave Cas alone after that little speech. He had to touch him. Reassure him. 

Cas immediately clutched at Dean. This is what he wanted. He wanted comfort. He was confused however, that Dean had chosen to stay. Even after what he had said. And even more amazingly, Dean didn’t see him that way. Didn't see him how Balthazar had.

“I’m sorry…” Dean sighs against Cas’ shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Cas. I didn’t realise.”  His arms were tightly wrapped around Cas, rocking him slowly back and forth.

“No, Dean. I’m sorry.” he sobbed. “I sh-shouldn’t have said what I- what I s-said–

“Shh Cas, Its okay.” Smoothing his hands down the older mans back in soothing motions, Dean gently pulls back. Afraid he was leaving, Cas’ hands clung tighter. “Look at me.” Pulled back far enough, he tipped Cas’ face up and gently cupped his jaw. “You are an amazing author Cas. Amazing. I’ve read all your books and you are unbelievable at writing. I don’t know why you think you’re not, but Cas–”

Dean brushes the residual tears that streaked Cas’ face, lingering when his thumb drags across the top of his cheekbone. A faint blush blooms on Cas’ cheeks and neck under the attention. Bringing his other hand up to Cas’ face, Dean strokes his cheeks softly, reveling in the heat of the blush and slight roughness of his stubble.


“–you will never seem that way to me.” Dean places a soft tentative kiss against his jaw. “You are smart.” Another kiss “You are witty.” Another “You are gorgeous.” And another “And did I mention how fucking smart you are?”

Cas sniffs and lets out a small chuckle. “Yes.” Cas’ lips turn up into a watery smile, leaning into Deans touch. His hands still caressing his cheeks, lips just inches away. “Multiple times in fact.”

“Well there see, its the truth.” They both fall silent after that. Cas reveling in the attention Deans giving him. He hasn’t felt like this since… ever. Not even with Balthazar.

“You’re like my guardian angel, you know that?”

“Oh no. I’m not the angel here…” Dean closes his eyes and rests his forehead against Cas’ “More like just a person who cares.” Sliding his hand down strong arms, Dean grasps Cas’ hands, interlocking their fingers. “A lot.”

“Now when you say ‘a lot’…”

“Oh no.” Dean leans back and places his lips sweetly to Cas’ plump ones. “I cant tell you that until you’ve eaten something decent.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll make a pie?”

Cas raises a brow. Just a person who cares my ass. This man is an angel. Cas just hopes one day, he could be like that. An angel. Dean’s angel…

I’ve been mulling a lot recently about the necessity of death.

I think most of us could agree that death is necessary here on earth. If no one ever died, we’d be screwed because we’d overpopulate and need to find other means to sustain ourselves. Plus, we’d have to be structured differently in terms of food, because pretty much gotta kill things to eat.

But even the eating aside, we’d overpopulate without death.

That got me thinking about other planes of existence. let’s take the Duat because it’s what I know–so when you die here and transition into a life there, you’re essentially being “born” into the Duat. And while the Duat aint’ getting a lot of people right now, once upon a time, a fair amount of people were flooding into the Duat on the regular.

We don’t talk much about people leaving the afterlife. At least, certain religions don’t. Kemeticism doesn’t. Christianity doesn’t.

If people enter into the plane, but never leave it, how long before the plane becomes too full?

And so that got me mulling on if there is, in fact, a rotation of people in afterlife planes. Whether they move somewhere else, or reincarnate back onto earth. I always figured you shouldn’t be forced into reincarnation, because that’s a shitty thing to do (although I’m pretty certain you can be forced, just don’t think you should be forced).

So for people who kinda want to come back to earth, but are scared… what if their bestie god says “I’ll come with you”??? What if a god is like “hey man, I get that you’re nervous, here is a portion of myself who will come with you back to earth” and that’s how you get shit like deitykin.

Or maybe a few people come back together, and that’s how multiple situations come about. Or maybe that’s how threadwork gets knotted btwn people, or how soul groups end up together (groups of people that tend to reincarnate into similar places). Maybe that’s why certain people feel called to certain gods or traditions. Maybe that’s why some gods treat people like “hey we met already once before”.

Cuz afterlife planes get full, too. And sometimes people want another ride on the merry-go-round called punishment orb earth, and things get mixed up in the process because reasons.

idk man. this is what i think about when i’m bored someonehelpsavemyfrommyself.

Chapter 30: Family Vacation


“Could you go get the door?” I asked my brother Myles. He was dating Christina so even though I don’t really  fuck with Chris heavy, I still do with Christina. Speaking of him, he wants to be friends but I don’t know if that’s a good idea. One, because he has a girlfriend and two, I might catch feelings again.

“Wassup?” I heard Chris voice, which snapped me out of my thoughts. Speaking of the devil.. This is the first time he came out the car to get Christina.

“You not gone speak?” Chris asked as he jumped in my lap, causing me to wince in pain. He’s not the same size as he was in high school. He’s gotten taller and heavier.

“Hi Chris..” I greeted him with a cheesy smile on my face. Myles gave me a look and started shaking his head because he knew how I felt about Chris. He gets on my nerves. He needs to stay in his lane with Christina. 

“Hey, you wanna go to this cabin with the crew?” He asked as I thought about it. It sounded fun but I’m not really close to them anymore and where would I fit in?

“Nah, I don’t fit in. Plus, it’s kind of weird being around your girlfriend and Raye all at once. I don’t think first loves should hang out.” I nicely declined as he sucked his teeth. I need to stay my ass at home anyways.

“Why?” He asked, looking really interested in my answer. 

“Cause we both got that special place in our heart for each other and I respect your relationship.” I said as he looked at me with a shocked and surprised expression on his face. 

“How come you ain’t respect it when I was with Raye?” He asked with a raised eyebrow, tilting his head to the side. I was honestly just being petty at first.

“I was young and dumb… I’m grown up now.” I smiled at him as I went in the kitchen and he soon followed right behind me.

“I’m hungry but I don’t wanna make a big ass meal when I’m just gonna be the only one eating.” I poured as my stomach started growling. 

“Myles?” Chris suggested as I waved him off. Myles gets on my nerves I swear. I just found out that he was my brother on my dad’s side a year ago.

“Fuck him, he never listens to me. He reminds me of you.” I said as I turned around to get something in the fridge. When I closed it back up, Chris was looking at my body like he was shocked and trying to figure something out. 

Man, I thought this big shirt would help. 

“Alisha, you pregnant. Why you trying to hide?” Chris chuckled as he raised up my shirt and started touching my stomach. He started to feel the baby kick and he got real excited. 

“I’m not its just that.. my boyfriend. He ain’t shit and I regret getting pregnant by him." 

"Why?” He asked, still admiring my belly. I knew he liked kids, but not this much. He should have one of his own with his girlfriend. 

“I mean.. we have our good times but he’s a fucking asshole most of the time. He had the nerve to ask me to get a paternity test.” I sighed, not really wanting to get into detail about him. I guess this was karma for messing up what Raye and Chris had. Other than my aint shit ass boyfriend, everything else is good. 

“That’s crazy. Y'all on good terms?” He asked, leaning on the counter since we were standing up in here so long. I haven’t got any chairs in here yet because we just moved here.

“Yea for now..” I mumbled, wanting to keep this conversation about him short. I hope he doesn’t come home, because he should be here any minute.

“Ight, if you need anything don’t hesitate to hit me up.” Chris told me as a smile started to spread across my face. I was surprised that he was being nice to me. I remember the last time we talked when he was at my house. 

I was about to speak but the sound of his phone ringing cut me off. Once he answered, I noticed that it was a FaceTime call and a little girl was on the screen. 

“Daddy.” The little girl said to Chris as he replied with a ‘huh’. Daddy? Since when did Chris have child? That’s so weird, I wonder who’s the mom. The little girl looked familiar but I couldn’t put my finger on it. 

“Yea, Ri?” Chris answered as he checked his freshly washed looking hair in the camera and started playing around in it. 

“Mommy said hurry up.” I heard her laugh as I heard Raye’s voice cursing hard as hell in the background. Who pissed her off? 

“Give mommy the phone.” Chris said as he sucked his teeth afterwards. 

“What Chris?” I heard Raye’s voice which had a hint of attitude in it. I could tell she had a mug on her face.

“Don’t be rushing me lil ugly.” Chris playfully said to her but she still wasn’t having it. Damn she must really not be in the mood.

“Chris hurry the fuck up I’m tired of waiting on your punk ass. My fucking stomach hurts.” She rolled her eyes as she gave the phone back to Amarie. 

“Daddy, I’ telling Cocoa.” His daughter said as she came back to the camera.

“What I do?” He asked, chuckling as she pointed to me since I was standing next to Chris. Both Chris and I started laughing. 

“No baby, that’s my fri–” he managed to get out but she had already hung up before he could finish his sentence. 

“You and Raye have a daughter? How old is she?" 

"Yes, and 3 why?” He asked as he checked the time on his watch. I guess he was about to leave before Raye beats his ass.

“Cause you said you and your girl been together for 4 years..” I said, cause that wasn’t really adding up unless he cheated which I doubt because he said he hates cheaters.

“I’ll explain everything to you later, text me!” He said before rushing out of the house with Christina. He didn’t even give me his number, so I guess he meant get it from Myles. 

We had just arrived at the Cabin in Aspen and Bliss and I were the first ones. We would’ve went to another state, but the cabins down here were nicer and most were bigger.  Hopefully, everybody doesn’t show up until the next hour cause I’m trying to get some before everybody comes. After that, I’m taking my ass to sleep.

“Baby, which one’s our room?” Bliss yelled from upstairs. This cabin was pretty nice. It was a 2 story cabin and I want the biggest room up in this bitch.

“Get the biggest one!” I yelled as I looked around to kind of get a tour before I went upstairs. It actually looked like a real house. This should be… fun.

“Ok, hurry up!” Bliss yelled causing me to smirk. Reversing back towards the steps, I jogged up them and looked around for the room that Bliss should be in. I saw a light on in one of the rooms so I’m guessing she was in that one. When I waked in, she was in the bathroom doing lord knows what so I just plopped down on the bed until she came out all mischievous and freaky.

We ain’t really got it in for a long time. We both been busy lately so I’m definitely down for this shit right now but they could be here any minute.

“What you bout to do?” I asked smiling as she tugged at the strings on my shorts before completely taking them off, leaving me in my boxers.

“Later Bliss, they probably gone be here while we doin it.” I said, because I didn’t want nobody to hear us. Especially since it was gonna be kids here, hell nah.

“You better give me some fucking dick, I don’t care.” She said with attitude. I knew that she was sexually frustrated, shit I was too.

“Nah B–” She cut me off by slipping her hands in my boxers to stroke me slowly up and down. “Mm, you like that baby?” She whispered/moaned in my ear, leaving me with no choice but to fuck her.

“My pussy will feel way better when you’re inside.” She whispered again, before I flipped us over so now that I was on top.
“Fuck, I’m tired.” Bliss breathlessly said to herself as she put her hand on her chest only for me to smirk. She caught me off guard the first time.

“They should be here any minute now.” I mumbled as I looked at the clock while I unwrapped my towel from around my waist. Since today was a chill day, I didn’t put on anything but sweats and socks.

Once I was done, I went back downstairs to see Raye coming in with lots of bags. She sat them down and just leaned against the table to take a break I guess. I would help, but the way my personality is set up; I’ll pass.

Walking straight past her into the kitchen, I smiled because there was already food in here. Just when I was about to reach for something, Raye called my name. “What man?” I asked nice as possible. She didn’t do anything I just wasn’t trying to talk to her right now. I just wanna see Amarie.

Before Raye could respond, I beat her to it. “Where my baby at?” I asked as Raye sighed and pointed to the door. On queue, August and Amarie came in looking like twins with Popeyes. August is like Amarie’s best friend now. At first, she was always telling me how cute he was, now it’s about how fun he is. I respect him for even being this nice after all the shit I did to him. I thought we’d never be cool.

“Dea’ go yo ugly ass daddy right dea’.” I heard August say as Amarie chuckled while she looked at me. That’s cold. Amarie had a chicken leg in her hand from Popeyes causing me to laugh. August got her addicted to it.

“Daddy is ugly.” Amarie nodded as she agreed with August and he gave her a high five. I sucked my teeth and pretended like I was gonna cry so that Amarie could feel bad.

“Daddy! I sorry!” Amarie gasped as she ran over to me and wrapped her arms around my leg to get my attention.

“It’s okay baby girl, but you got chicken grease all on me. Uncle Aug gone make you fat.” She giggled as she took a napkin and wiped the grease off of my face.
“We gone be fat together then, ain’t we?” August asked as he wiped some grease from his face also. Amarie nodded and I shook my head at them.

“Where’s Bliss?” Ty asked as he cut our little daughter, uncle and daddy time off. “She upstairs, man.” I said before I realized I shouldn’t have told him that because she was probably still changing her clothes but oh well.

I was about to talk to Amarie but she was already walking over to Raye to play with her I guess. “Why y'all get hea’ so early?” August asked, raising his eyebrow. He damn the reason we got here so early.

“Cause we ain’t fucked in a minute, and Bliss wanted the dick; badly.” I explained, thinking back on how freaky she kept being on the way here. She kept trying to get me to finger her and shit on the plane.

“What was she doing?”

“First, she didn’t give a fuck that there was a few people by us, she still was trying to pull a nigga dick out. Since I ain’t wanna let that happen she was begging me to finger her.” I chuckled as I explained to August what happened. Bliss was an undercover freak. If you looked at her you wouldn’t even know.

“Damn, I didn’t know she the type to do all that. You turned her into a freak.”

“No the fuck I didn’t, she was like that before we got together man. She freakier than me, I swear. Every time we fuck she does something new.” I smiled, fantasizing about her.

“Hey Chris, I’m gonna go upstairs with Amarie until she falls asleep, ok?” Raye assured me as she started twirling her straight jet black hair around in her hand. Weird. She was cute though.

“Aight, goodnight Aria. I love you, come kiss daddy.” I said calling her by her middle name as she sleepily walked over to me rubbing her eyes.

“Luv’ you too, daddy.” She said as I puckered my lips up for her to kiss. She kissed them and was about to walk off until August stopped her. “Wea’ my kiss?” August asked, acting like he was hurt. Amarie laughed and sat on his lap to give him a kiss on the cheek.

“Stay tru, love you.” August said as the did a little handshake that I’m pretty sure August came up with. This nigga always making up different handshakes.
“Stay tru, luv you too.” Amarie said, surprising me as both Raye and I laughed. She ran over to Raye before following her upstairs.

“Tell everybody to come down here a nigga bored.” I told August as he nodded before standing up to stretch.

“Ion fuck with you Raye, move!” I heard August say from upstairs while laughing playfully. I wonder if he was serious. I ain’t never really seen them have a full blown convo ever since he been back in the crew.

I feel bad for breaking up their relationship but he ain’t give a fuck while we was together either. Maybe it was for the best though. If they was still together, we would’ve been like how me and Don are. Speaking of the devil, I was gonna go upstairs at the same time he and everybody else was coming down but I accidentally bumped into him.

“My nigga, don’t start wit’ me today I ain’t in the mood.” Don said as I scrunched up my face. I was gonna apologize but fuck that, that shit is dead. He just has to say something.

“Chris, what did you do?” Raye huffed as she rolled her eyes at me. See, this is why Raye irks me. She acts like everything gotta be perfect with this nigga. Ain’t nobody did shit to his bum ass.

“Fuck outta’ here Raye, you always trying to act funny when he around. Do he know about those texts you sent me about how you wanna be a family and how much you miss me? Oh and I couldn’t leave out the most important part. You said you wanted to fuck me. Does he know that?” I spat as Don looked at Raye like he wanted to slap her.

“Damn, Raye you a straight playa’.” August said causing everybody to laugh but us 3; Raye, Don, and me. I’d hate to be Raye right now.

“You just saying that cause she did you like that.” Bliss shot at him, starting a war. They always starting something with each other. Just when August was about to hit her with some fire, Raye beat him to it.

“Bitch, don’t ever speak about me.” Raye said as she stood up in front of Bliss. Bliss chuckled bitterly before pushing Raye back a little bit to give herself some room to stand up. Aw shit, I should’ve known that this was coming. Bliss tolerated Raye’s shit for a long time for the sake of me and Amarie.

“I’m about 2.5 seconds away from fucking you u–” I quickly cut Bliss of by moving her away from Raye. Bliss got them hands. Not saying that Raye doesn’t cause she beats my ass sometimes but Bliss on a whole nother’ level (I’m talkin’ Mayweather) and I’d honestly hate to see either one of them get hurt.

“Control your wack ass bitch ass baby momma, Chris!” Bliss yelled as she sat all the way across the room quickly moving her leg up and down to calm herself. I was about to tell her to chill with the bitch word but Raye started yelling again. I hope they don’t wake the kids up.

“No bitch, he needs to control you! You act like I want him or something. If I did, I took him from you once and I can do it again, it’s nothing. You act like the nigga really loves your ass, if he did he wouldn’t have cheated on you!” Raye yelled as everybody got quiet with wide eyes. Nah, she ain’t have to say that shit. Even though Bliss didn’t show it, I know it hurted her feelings. The cheating was a touchy topic for her.

“Raye chill o–” Ty and I both said at the same time. I’m surprised Ty even spoke. He mainly been quiet for some reason.

“Ohhhh, so you think he loves you? Bihhhh, You’re the mother of his child yet he still treats you like a dumb ass bitch and you let him. Bitch, he’s has 0 respect for your lame ass. He even treated his past hoes better than you. He bullied you, put his hands on you multiple times, and he stays calling you all types of shit. Oh but that’s love right? Alright, girl, I’ll just sip my tea.” Bliss said before she ended up laughing like a hyena. August was about to start laughing with her but I gave him a look so he just put his head down.

I knew that it hurt Raye’s feelings bad because she looked like she wanted to cry. Even though Don was mad, he was still trying to help her but she just pushed him off and ran outside.

“Bliss, that shit was too harsh.” I said as I blew air out of my cheeks. She sucked her teeth and shrugged with out a care in the world. I know what Raye said was harsh too but these are two different people with two different personalities.

“Why the fuck would you say that to her?” Bri asked angrily as she stood up. Bliss looked at her like she was crazy.

“Don’t even go there with me, Bri. She fucking started it and it ain’t my fault that her sensitive ass can’t finish it. Don’t shake unless you ready to get shook; point blank period.” She spat as she waved Bri off. Lord..

“That’s my best-friend!” August cheesed as they did a little handshake. Bri hit him on the arm so he quickly sat back down, mugging her.

“Man Bliss, take yo ass upstairs I’ll handle you later.” I sighed as I started to head towards the front door to check on Raye.

“Whatever, Chris.” Bliss said, recovering from her laughter. I was mad at Bliss but at the same time I wasn’t cause Raye started it. I told her not to fuck with her but she didn’t listen. I’m still gone check Bliss later on though. I can’t just let Raye get her feelings hurt like that

Sighing as I twisted the doorknob, I made my way on the porch to see Raye on the bench smoking a blunt with watery eyes. Once she noticed me, she continued to smoke as she just stared ahead of her. “She’s right..” She mumbled, looking down at the grown shaking her head.

“No she not, Raye. Don’t listen to her, she was just talking shit. I already explained this to you a few weeks ago so why would you let her get to you? Have I been disrespecting you lately? Nah, I’m changing. I know it’s fucked up that I did it in the past, but I’m changing now because I do love you and she knows that. Just stop comparing yourself to her cause y'all in two different positions when it comes to me.” I explained, trying to make sure she understood what I was trying to say.

“She hurt my feelings..” She frowned, causing me to suck my teeth. I gotta stop babying her, that’s why she a crybaby now.

“So why would you talk shit knowing that you sensitive as hell? I warned you not to fuck with her.” I told her as she just shrugged and chuckled.
“I wasn’t expecting that from her, she’s usually quiet around me I guess.” She explained as I shook my head no. She was just putting up with her bullshit that’s why she was quiet.

“You got it all wrong. She loud as hell. She not mean at all but she will put you in your place if you fuck with her. She just quiet around you cause she don’t fuck with you.” I said being 100 percent honest.

“Whatever..” She mumbled, not having anything else to say.

“Yall both need to apologize.” I stated truthfully. That shit was uncalled for.
“I’m good, I should get going though. You want this?” Raye asked as she stood up, with the half smoken blunt in her hands. I nodded and she gave it to me before leaving. Hopefully this shit gets me high as fuck.

Pulling out my phone, I told Bliss to come on the porch before putting it away again. Within a minute, she was out here sitting on my lap.
“Bliss, don’t ever say no shit like that again.” I said as she smacked her lips and looked at me like I was crazy.

“So did y'all not hear her disrespect me first?” She asked in disbelief. I did, but it’s kind of like that situation where you and your younger sibling gets into a fight and your mom lets the younger one slide.

“Yea but Bliss, Raye is a crybaby and you know this. You should’ve just walked away and been the bigger person. Not saying what she did was right cause I already checked her about that too but just don’t do it again, ight?” I said as I took another pull of the blunt. Bliss still wasn’t having it.

“Man, fuck that. You got me all types of fucked up, Chris. I ain’t no punk ass bitch, I’m not bout to let her talk to me like I’m a dog. You know if some shit like that happened to you, you’d be ready to drag somebody in a heart beat so miss me with that 'she’s a crybaby bullshit’. Maybe she needs to man the fuck up. Fuck you and her. Why don’t you go be with her since you care about her feelings so much. You don’t think mines were hurt when she brought up the cheating?” Bliss explained, rolling her eyes as she stormed back into the cabin, slamming the door behind her. 

See I told y'all she had a short temper. I’m not even bout to kiss her ass I’m bout to get her ass for going off on me.
Putting the blunt out, I walked back into the cabin and went upstairs to my room to find Bliss. “Still got an attitude?” I asked as I locked the door behind me.
She ignored me so I nodded and got all in her face to see if she’d get mad. Knowing her, she probably would.

 "Chris get the fuck away from me. Go check on that bitch since you care about her feelings so damn much.“ She spat, roughly pushing me away from her.

"See, that smart ass mouth of yours, it’s gonna land you in a place you don’t wanna be baby girl,” I grunted roughly.  "and guess what, you’re some place you shouldn’t wanna be.“ I chuckled evilly.

As the evil smirk stood plastered on my face, Bliss eyes widen in a bit of horror. Tilting my head to the side, "Scared?” I questioned , earning a small nod from her & she got up off the bed. “I-im gonna go get a bite to eat ,yea babe I’m hungry.” she chuckled nervously.

“You better stand tf up and strip.” I demanded. With an instant, her clothes were to her ankles. Smiling at her , “Bend over. Hands behind your back baby.” I said softly into her ear. “Chris please don’t hurt me.” she begged desperately. The fact she thought I was gonna hurt her , made me frown hard. I had no plans to hurt her, please her in a different way? Yes but hurt her? No.

Sending a hard slap to her ass , as dark as my baby was , I could still see my imprint. Smacking it over and over and over again, small cries and whimpers seeped from her lips & they low key satisfied me. “You said you wouldn’t hurt me.” she mumbled.

“Hurt you? But you’re wet as fuck for me baby.” I chuckled, sliding my index finger inside her slowly, she let out a very satisfying moan that made a nigga dick harder than what it already was. My boy was ready for some good ass sex and tonight I was going in her raw! I wanna feel her, all of her.

Trying to ride my finger , I used my free hand to grab her breast and squeeze on it to sort of pleasure myself. Sick of this small foreplay , I pulled my fingers out of her.

“Lay on your back B.” I instructed her slowly stroking myself. Letting out a low moan, she sat up and pulled my bottoms down & proceeded to take off my shirt . She then , fixed her hair to where it wouldn’t fall in her face . “What you about to do baby ?” I asked , oblivious to what she was doing or trying to act oblivious.

“You pleased me with the spanking daddy, now it’s my turn.” she smiled at me. Taking all of me into her mouth slowly , her hands rested behind her back as her mouth did all of the work. The way her jaws flexed against my flesh & her tongue swiveled around my tip that was begging to release its precum - I was bound to moan any minute but I tried my hardest to hold that in.

Placing my hands on the back of her head, I pushed her head down farther so my dick could hit the back of her throat & that’s what it did. Looking down at her, she didn’t gag and that impressed me . Pulling me out out of her mouth, she spit on my dick to make it extra wet and sloppy. Yea , my baby knew just how I liked it, wet and sloppy.

Gripping my guy with her small soft hand, she placed me back inside her mouth and used her hand to jack me off while she used her mouth to suck on my tip. “I want you to nut all in my mouth daddy & then fill up my pussy.” she moaned/ hummed on my tip sending a wave of vibrations through it.

Moaning, as good as that sounded , I wanted my kids to be else where & that was deep inside her, all the times I bust.“I got a better idea baby. Lay back on the bed.” I took myself out of her mouth . Holding up her hand , she quickly ran to the bathroom to wash out her mouth cause she knew at some point I would wanna kiss her deeply.

Quickly coming back, she laid on the bed with her legs spread wide awaiting for me to enter her. Pulling her to the edge , I teased her entrance with my tip before fully pushing myself deep inside of her , trying to let out my first release. “Christopherrrr.” she moaned quietly. “What baby, what you want?” I asked , rubbing her beautiful pearl.

“You feel so good daddy, so good.” she clenched her walls. Leaning down, she wrapped her legs around my waist to pull me in deeper & her arms around my neck. Grunting, I kissed her lips & she kissed me back with just as much passion.

“Fuck bliss you’re wetter than an ocean baby.” I let her know which im sure she already knew because you could hear her wetness. As my balls slapped against her ass, her eyes was squeezed shut, taking all of me.

“Ima cum in a second baby.” I warned her about my first release. “Fuck,” I moaned lowly, causing her to get wetter. Moaning once again like a little bitch, I came all inside her.

With more energy inside of me, while her walls were tightly clenched around me, I was still able to lay against the headboard so she could ride me. Positioning herself on me, she slid down on my dick slowly letting out a small whimper.

“It’s like you get bigger each time baby.” she moaned loudly. Chuckling, I gripped her hips and made her ride me slow. Yea she knew how I liked it, slow in the beginning and then speed that shit up in a few minutes.

A few moans and grunts slipped out of my mouth as she removed my hands and wanted to do everything on her own. Placing my arms behind my head, a small camera caught my eye & I grabbed it. Turning it on , I started to record her. The first thing I caught was her beautiful sex faces.

“Rub that clit, stank.” I demanded. Doing as I say, I placed my lips on her left nipple, sucking it like my life depended on it. I knew it drove her crazy when I would suck & lick on her & I’ve been dying to titty fuck her but I’ll save that for later.

“Baby, im finna cum!” she screamed. Sitting the camera down on the nightstand to where it was still facing us, I bounced her up and down like crazy making her body tremble like crazy. “Let it out baby.” I encouraged, rubbing her clit for her.

Feeling her cum all on my dick, she began to slow down and try to lay her head on my shoulder knowing damn well we was not done. “Don’t get it twisted baby girl, we ain’t no where near done. Ass up face down.” I smiled causing her to pout slightly but obey anyways.

Entering her from behind, I grabbed onto her hips as she grabbed onto the sheets tightly. Slamming myself inside her, she threw her ass back. Nothing more attractive than when a woman can fuck you too.
“Damn this feel so fucking good.” I grunted grabbing a handful of her hair as I wrapped it around my hand to make her face me.

“Oh yea? What about this, baby? You like that?” She moaned as she started wining her hips like she was from the islands. Damn, I’m in heaven right now.
“Fuck, just like that.” I moaned on accident as she started chuckling.
Smacking her ass, “You in for a long night baby girl.” I grunted as a moan slipped out of her mouth.

“Oh don’t worry baby, I’m ready ”.she looked back at me and licked her lips. Biting my bottom lip, a nigga was going to sleep pleased & was gonna wake up hungry as fuck . I already knew that much so she better be prepared to cook for daddy in the morning.


“Daddy get up, I smell bweakfast.” Amarie said in my ear in a raspy voice, waking me up. I looked down and she was comfortably laying on my chest like she’d been here all night.

“When did you get in here?” I asked as I rubbed my eyes and sat up a little bit. Good thing Bliss and I cleaned up everything when we were done.
“Last night. I had a bad dream daddy.” She said as she started frowning. Damn, a nigga must’ve been knocked out cause I did not hear or feel her get in bed.

“About?” I asked out of curiously. I don’t think it’ll be anything serious, maybe just about monsters or some shit.

“Cocoa was dead.” She said, causing me to frown. Why would she randomly be having dreams about that? Damn, I gotta tell Bliss. That’s crazy. As soon as I heard 'dead’, my heart dropped. Ion’ wanna ever think about Bliss dying.

“Baby, she’s not gonna die. I promise.” I assured her as her frown turned into a smile and she nodded. Damn, that’s crazy. I wonder why she would have a dream about that. It gotta mean something. A nigga bout to start being protective as fuck now.

“Ok daddy, let’s brush!” She said as she led us into the bathroom with my bag in her hand. It had our tooth brushes in it.
“Yea you need to cause yo breath stank.” I said, playfully as Amarie rolled her eyes and mugged me. She handed me my tooth brush out of the bag before getting hers. I put toothpaste on both of our toothbrushes before we started to brush.

“My nigga, I heard you and Bliss all last night.” August said as he came in the bathroom and dapped me up, smirking. This nigga texted me about how he snuck some random hoe in last night at the same time Bliss and I got it in.

“Close yo ears, baby girl.” I told Amarie as she did exactly what I said. I was talking while I was brushing my teeth so I’m surprised she understood me.

“Maaaaaan, she put it on a nigga. Where Ty, Ray, and Cam? We all gotta talk.” I said as August furrowed his eyebrows before answering my question.

“They in the kitchen. Yo future wife cooking, but what about Don?” He asked, already knowing my answer. He just wanted to be childish.

“Ion’ fuck with him. He shady as fuck. I be trying to tell Raye.” When he heard Raye’s name, I guess he ain’t wanna talk no more.

“I guess, I just came up here to say that and check on my baby.” He smirked as he picked up Amarie. He made her get water everywhere because she was rinsing our her mouth.

“You in trouble..” Amarie said as she looked at the water on the floor and then Aug. Her frown was now upside down once she realized that Aug was in here.

“Unclwe’ Aug!” She squealed which gave me time to rinse out my mouth. Since I took a shower before I went to sleep I decided to just take one later since I was about to get in the pool anyways.

Once I was done, I noticed that Ri and August had left me in here by myself. Going back in our room, I searched for my swimming trunks. Once I found them, I stripped out of my sweats and put them on.

My phone starting vibrating while I looked around for it. Once I seen the light flashing, I noticed that it was on the bed so I grabbed it and seen a new text from Bliss.

CocoaPuff😍😘😜😋🙊💘💍: are you up yet?

Chris: yea baby here I come, U got on yo bathing suit ? 😜

CocoaPuff😍😘😜😋🙊💘💍: lol yes underneath my robe.

Wanting to make her smile, I found a pic of her in my phone and uploaded it to Instagram. That should do it.

fuckyopictures: this girl got me feeling like a corny ass nigga rn 😩 I love you 😘😋😍💘💍 #mygfbetterthanurs #notaggingher

Chris: babe go check my ig 😜

Since she didn’t text me back, I’m guessing that she was checking it. Tossing my phone back on the bed, I jogged downstairs to the kitchen to see everybody but Raye and Don in there. I’ll check on her later.

“Chris, I love you too.” Bliss said she noticed that I was finally in here. She held her arms out for me while I chuckled and leaned in for a kiss. Rubbing my hands from her waist, all the way to her ass I heard Amarie mumble an 'Ew daddy’ causing me to stop.

“Nah Amarie, that’s not nasty.” I told her as she looked at Bliss and I before nodding. Since my plate was already at the table, I ate it as Bliss sat next to me with her arms wrapped around my torso. It didn’t take me long to eat because a nigga was starving.

“Thanks babe, here.” I thanked her as I handed her my plate. She washed it off and gave me her robe before running to the back to get in the pool. Grown ass kid.

“I wanna go swimming, daddy.” Amarie said as she started finishing up her food. I was gonna ask her if she wanted to come.

“Ok, go ask your momma for yo swimsuit.” I said as I helped her off the stool before she took off running to find Raye.

Making my way out to the back, I saw Bliss in the pool fixing the back of her bra. I should be childish and untie the strings.

“We should’ve got in this bitch, naked.” I mumbled to myself but I think Bliss heard me cause she started shaking her head.

“Don’t come by me with your freaky self, I’m chilling.” Bliss said as she put her hands up for me to stay away. She knew that I was the type of nigga to untie the strings to her bottoms.

Obeying her command, I carefully grabbed my phone at the edge of the pool and went to Ig to take a pic of her. “Look over here baby.” I told her as she did just that and I snapped the pic before uploading it. “You couldn’t even see your face cause your hair but that body on fleek.” I said, chuckling as I thought of a caption.

fuckyopictures: I found Cheif keef sister 😂

Putting my phone away, I was about to dunk Bliss but Amarie came by her and put her feet in. “Hey baby girl, you wanna get in?” Bliss greeted her with a big smile on her face.

“I can’t swim.” She pouted as Bliss frowned and started to think of an idea. I could tell because she always made the same cute thinking face.

“It’s not that deep, I’ll hold you the whole time. Come on.” Bliss assured her as she held her arms out for Ri to jump in. Ri hesitated at first but then she jumped and landed right into Bliss’ arms.

“Wasn’t so bad, wasn’t it?” Bliss asked as Amarie shook her head no, smiling. I would’ve been playing with them, but I was just admiring this whole scene. I respect Bliss so much for treating Amarie like she’s her own. She’s real good with kids and I can tell she’s gonna be a great mother. That’s exactly why I want her to have my baby. I wonder if she know we ain’t use a condom last night..

“Mommy said I cwant’ get my hair wet.” Ri frowned as I examined her hair. It did look like Raye just did it and that she took her sweet ass time on it but oh well. What’s the point of going swimming if you can barely get wet?

“Mommy can suck my–” I was about to say until Bliss cut me off.

“Chris!” She screeched, hitting me in my chest. Oh yea, good thing I have her around. I’d be cussing like a motherfucker.

“Oh yea, uh that’s okay Ri. I’ll tell her that I said you could.” I assured her as she nodded and started splashing water every where. Kids..

“Why does it look hot but it’s cold as hell?” Bliss shivered as I shrugged.
I was ready to go where all the mountains and stuff were cause that’s were most of the snow was. It was just a little where we were at. Snow boarding gone be too turnt.


“The kids sleep?” Bri asked as she sat next to me on one of the stools in the kitchen. We were supposed to be making snacks for a movie that we were gonna be watching. Didn’t wanna go all out cause the kids are here. We’re supposed to be going snow boarding tomorrow.

“Yes, thank God.” I sighed as I pretended to wipe fake sweat off of my forehead. It takes forever to get King and Amarie to sleep, they’re  filled with lots of energy. They think everything is funny just like both of their goofy ass fathers.

“So, wassup with you and Don?” Bri asked, causing me to sigh. Don and I no longer talk unless it’s about Amarie. He already has trust issues from his past relationships and he said he was really starting to catch feelings for me and was gonna make it official until he found out about those texts. I don’t know what I was thinking sending those texts. I was drunk but at the same time I knew what I was doing.

“Nothing, he cut off all ties with me and he only wants to speak to Amarie.” I sighed as I played with the rings on my fingers. Bri gasped brought my head up for me to look at her. She had a look of sympathy in her eyes.

“Did he let you explain?” She asked, frowning a little bit. He actually did let me explain, because he’s an understanding person.

“Yes actually, but I told him the truth. He doesn’t deserve for me to keep leading him on.” I didn’t wanna lie to him, he didn’t deserve it. He’s never lied to me. I told him how long I’ve been feeling like this and everything and I feel completely bad because this is the same thing that happened to August except we were actually together. Maybe this is telling me something.

“That’s true.. you guys were so cute.” She gushed, shaking her head. Too bad we’re not gonna hang around each other anymore.

“Why does this keep happening?” I sighed, putting my head in my hands. Bri told me face her and I did just that. She sighed and grabbed my hands before speaking. “Raye, honestly… deep down you still have feelings for Chris and you haven’t completely moved on. You can’t get into another relationship if you’re not even over your past one. Be honest, you wanna be a big happy family with him.” Bri told me as I thought about what she said. I wasn’t about to admit that. I don’t need Chris.

“What’s the point of admitting it if its not gonna happen? He’s in love with Bliss. He’s about to marry her..” I asked as Bri looked deep into thought. Probably thinking about what I had said.

“Tell him how you feel?” She suggested as I scrunched up my face and shook her head no. If I told Chris he’d probably be like 'damn’, and that’s it. He probably wouldn’t even say anything.

“For what? It’s not going to change anything. He doesn’t even act the same towards me. I don’t even think he really loves me. He only does because of Amarie.” I explained as Bri frustratedly shrugged.

“I honestly don’t know Raye.. but I gotta get going. I’m sleepy, we’ll finish this tomorrow.” Bri said as she got up before kissing me on the cheek. When she left, I heard somebody coming down the stairs but I didn’t pay no mind to them until I seen who they were. Chris and Amarie.

“Hey! Amarie, didn’t I just put you to sleep?”  I asked as both Chris and Amarie jumped. They had the same 'dear caught in headlights’ look on their faces that was too cute.

Amarie shook her head no which caused me to sigh. They both had on coats so it looked like they were about to go outside. I looked in Chris’ hand and saw Graham crackers, Hershey’s, and marshmallows with sticks.

“Wanna join?” Chris asked me with a smile on his face. I didn’t have anything else to do and some s'mores sounds good right now. But me hanging around him more is going to make my feelings get stronger.

“Yea, hold on.” I said as I walked towards the front door to get my coat off of the rack. Once my Burberry coat was on, I slipped into some black sparkly UGGs. Surprisingly, Amarie were wearing the same thing.

“Why y'all niggas up?” August whispered as he came downstairs with some random girl. I guess she was leaving because she had her purse and stuff in her hand.

“We making s'mores.” Chris chuckled as he shook his head at August. August pointed to her ass while she wasn’t looking and Chris demonstrated a moon with this hands while laughing. Amarie put her hand on her hip and waited for August to acknowledge her. He didn’t until the girl finally left.

“Why you looking at me like that?” August asked, chuckling as Amarie ignored him and grabbed Chris and I’s hand leading us in thebackyard where the logs were for us to sit on. Aw, she doesn’t want august’ attention on anybody else’s but hers.

“You good?” Chris asked as we all sat down. He looked really sincere and concerned which shocked me.

“Uh, y-yea.” I half lied as Chris looked at me with a 'you lying’ face. He saw right through me. I didn’t wanna bring it up because I didn’t wanna cry in front of Amarie. I don’t think she was paying attention anyway, she was too busy stealing chocolate.

“I can’t ever keep a relationship.. all because I still..” I managed to get out but the water works started approaching. I was lowkey glad they did because I didn’t want to admit that I still wanted to be with Chris. It’s sad that it took this long for me to realize it. He’s already moved on.

“Because you what, Raye?” Chris asked, wiping some of my tears as I shook my head no. I was not about to tell him, because he’d start feeling cocky and there isn’t anything he can do about it.

“Mommy don’t cry.” Amarie said as wiped some off the chocolate from her mouth, causing me to chuckle a little bit. She could always make me smile when I’m having a bad day.

“Hey! You over here sneaking chocolate and shit. You ain’t slick.” Chris said to Amarie as she started giggling while she gave Chris the hag of Hershey’s back. There were still plenty in there so I guess she only got a few.

“Aw, look at the beautiful family.” I heard August voice. We all turned around as Chris picked up a rock and threw it at him. He cursed to himself and quickly ran back in the cabin making all of us laugh. This should be fun.

“Wanna join?” Chris asked as I sniffled and sucked my teeth. August been acting real shady towards me ever since him and Chris been cool again. It’s getting annoying.

He nodded and pulled his beanie down before making his way over to us. The was only a space by me so he picked Amarie up and sole her spot before sitting her on his lap. See? Shady. “You mad at me?” He asked Amarie as she stubbornly folded her arms over her chest and nodded.

“Girl, you know I luh’ yo jealous ass.” He laughed as he started placing kisses all over her face. She put her stubbornness aside and giggles started leaving her mouth.

“I love you too Uncle Aug.” Chris said in a little girly voice causing both Amarie and August to mug him. Nobody laughed but Chris and I.

“Nigga, you gay.” August shook his head before laughing. As expected, Amarie laughed along with him.

“Hey Uncwle Ty and Titi Nae.” Amarie greeted Ty and Nae as they both looked confused before shrugging and waving back at her.

“Damn we was about to get freaky in the pool. What are y'all doing?” Ty huffed as he noticed all of us out here.

“Bout to make s'mores.” Chris answered while showing them all the products we were using like they didn’t know what s'mores were.

“Ok, we coming let us go change.” Nae said as she grabbed Ty’s hand to lead them back in the cabin. “We need music.” I heard August mumble. This is gonna be a long night with all of us out here. They better keep the conversations kid friendly too because Amarie’s out here.

So my drawing Buddy came over annnnnnd......
  • Buddy: Hey I'm finally done with this comic!
  • Me: *Looks up from my character designs* Huh? The one you just started? Or the one you been working on for three days?
  • Buddy: Yeah.....Take a look! I'm pretty proud of it......
  • Me: *Takes her note book and read the comic*
  • Buddy: *Plays with her thumbs* Do you like it?
  • Me: *Chuckles* Love it♥ You know thats my favorite ship! Why would I not like this! *Grins*
  • Buddy: Mines too.....*Blushes and smiles*
  • Me: *hands her back her book* When you gonna Ink, color, and post that bad boy? Alot of other shippers would love it!
  • Buddy: Post it......Like where?
  • Me: Tumblr, Twitter, Facebook. ....I don't know. Somewhere, where people will enjoy your art work.
  • Buddy: No!.....I mean....I'll ink and color it......But I'm not gonna post it.......
  • Me: And why not?
  • Buddy: .....Because.....Well you know I only have a tumblr account and.....Well.....If you look that tag up there is so much hate and harassment. You know I can't handle any type of harassment! *frowns*
  • Me: Oh.....Yeah i've seen it. *Shrugs and sighs* I say you shouldn't let that stop ya but I understand what you mean.
  • Buddy: You aren't.....phased by this?
  • Me: Nah.....
  • Buddy: Why Not...? You draw and write too......
  • Me: Here is how I see it: Those haters.....Well Bashers is a better term.....are very childish. And I ain't aint got no time to be fighting with a child or someone who acts as such. If you strongly dislike the ship, Turn around and get out the tag. Stop filling the tag with unneeded hate and drama. And if people don't tag a peice of art work and it bugs you that much, You can make a public post or ask that person to tag their stuff next time. As long as you do it nicely.
  • Buddy: I see.....
  • Me: People who like one ship have as much right to like that ship as people who don't like it to not like it.
  • Buddy: .....Wha.....
  • Me: What i mean is shippers have the right to ship whatever they like. And other shippers have the right to dislike whatever they don't.
  • Buddy: Oooooh
  • Me: Right. And If you and other people who don't deal with harassment well feel scared to post something as simple as a little fluffy comic. There is a problem. Everyone should welcome all the people in their fandom. No matter what they ship.
  • Buddy: I guess you're right.
  • Me: Tumblr and other websites/Mobile apps shouldn't be a war zone.
  • Buddy: Yeahh......
  • Me: But to get back to the topic: I think you should ink it, add that color, and post it. Let everyone see you're amazing work. But if you don't wanna, I won't make you.
  • Buddy: ......Yeeeeah I might! You really think people would like it.
  • Me: Yeah, FlutterShy!
  • Buddy: *Groans* For the last time.....I'm not a pink and yellow pony! *Whines*
  • Me: *Snorts* You sure as hell act like her.
  • Buddy: Imma tell my boyfriend on you. .....
  • Me: So? I'll kick his ass.....again!
  • Buddy: ........
  • Me: ........*Grins*
  • Boths: *Starts laughing*
Chapter 21 (Short)


*1 Month Later*

I woke up in cold sweat, and with the biggest hard on ever after yet another wet dream about Robin. After she told me she was pregnant we’ve been working on things and it isn’t the greatest, but we’re better then we were a few months ago. She’s been coming, and spending the nights here randomly which has been fun. The bad side is when she does I wake up like this. She won’t let me touch her intimately to a certain extent and it’s driving me crazy!!!

“Rob?” I said trying to shake her awake.

We’d go through this all the time. I’d wake her up in the wee hours of the morning. Try to get some, and as soon as I get her where I need her she falls back to sleep or tells me go take a cold shower. I haven’t had sex in over a month, and my dick feels so betrayed.

“Go to sleep Chris. I’m gonna stop coming here you know” she groaned in her sleep.

I chuckled “I love you.”

“Love your ass too, now go to sleep or hit the showers cause you not touching me. You knew you needed this pussy so bad then you shouldn’t of fell in another” she said before rolling over on her side.

I groaned in frustration as I looked at her. I couldn’t wait until she let me make love to her again. I promise I’m going to make her feel good. It’s been so long all I’m doing is having dreams of her riding me into utter bliss.

Aside from all that we have a baby on the way. She’s about 10 weeks into the pregnancy, and I don’t think she’s looked anymore beautiful. She hasn’t started showing at all yet, but I know it’ll start soon. You really couldn’t tell she was pregnant the last time until she was about 6 months, so I expect the same again.

I think this pregnancy came at the right time because, before I was so sure I was looking at our demise. It brought us closer together. As for Karrurche I haven’t talked to her since that day I told her she had to go. I hated treating her badly because as someone I once loved I wanted to show her some respect rather than treating her like she was some thot. I knew she understood why I had to do what I’m doing, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m hurting her. I hate hurting people man I don’t care who it is.

I quietly got out of bed, and introduced myself to the refrigerator. If I couldn’t make love to my wife then I was going to make love to some fruits. I pulled out the mixed fruit platter, and sat in the living room quietly eating. When I looked up Rob was coming out the room towards me messy hair out, and clad in my t-shirt.

“Your not going to come back to bed?” She asked taking a seat next to me grabbing some fruit.

“Robin I can’t be in the same bed with you, and not touch you. It’s driving me crazy, so no I’m not coming back to bed” I said popping a piece of mango in my mouth.

“But Chris, I can’t sleep if your not there. When I’m home, I toss and turn all night unless little Chris climbs in bed with me” she whined.

I chuckled and she looked at me all upset “what’s so funny?”

“We’re having a squabble about nothingness. This so wouldn’t of been us four weeks ago, we’re making progress here” I said making her laugh.

“You know, your right. Ugh my clothes are starting to get tight, and my bras are getting smaller. Why’d you do this to me again? Your evil” she said making me chuckle.

“Stop complaining about your appearance your sexy as fuck baby. And I didn’t do anything to you that you didn’t want, so cut it out” I said rubbing her tights.

“I’m sexy as fuck huh? So why’d you cheat on me?” She asked looking at me.

Man, ever since she told she was pregnant her hormones have been raging. She switches from she loves me to she hates me so fast.

“Robin Hood, I told you I’m sorry. I’m trying my hardest here to do better for you. I fucked up babe, but my fuck up doesn’t change the fact that I think your the most beautiful girl placed here just for me. And the fact that we’re going to have a baby girl that looks just like her mother excites me” I said making her blush.

“Who said it was a girl?” She asked curiously.

“I did, now stop upsetting my daughter with your mess, and gimme some love” I said pecking her lips.

“You know we still haven’t addressed the main issue at hand” she said.

I shrugged “what’s that?”

“Why we keep hurting each other the way we’ve been doing” she said tracing my arms tattoos.

“I guess we gotta find a better way to deal with our hurt and anger towards each other if this is going to work. I’m trying to be all I can be for you, and these kids. I just need to know you got me, and the rest we can handle along the way” I said reassuringly.

“Question though” I said immediately after.


“Did you not fight Kae because you were pregnant?” I asked curious.

“That, and I didn’t want to kill her. I really hate how much you care about her” she said irritated.

“Do you know that it’s always been you, and no one can ever he superior to you?” I asked her.

She nodded “I think I do, it’s the believing it’s true part that needs to come into play. I’m working on it though.”

“Good because the sooner you believe that, the better off you and I will be. Your the ultimate prize” I said grabbing her face kissing her deeply.

Everything I was saying was no lie. Robin meant everything to me. But, don’t think for one second that I wasn’t using how vulnerable she was to my advantage. I wanted some of my pussy and I was getting it tonight. I rubbed her thighs, and broke the kiss attacking her neck.

“Chris stop it” she gasped.

“You really want me to stop huh? You don’t miss me? It’s been 3 months baby. I know you want me” I said gripping the inner most parts of her thighs right next to her haven.

She hissed “no, we can’t not yet.”

“Come on, let me at least taste it, and put the tip in. I’m throbbing for you” I said placing her right hand on my hard on that was pulsing.

She moaned the minute she felt me, and I knew I had an open window. The minute I opened her legs her damn phone rang making me groan in frustration. Why’d she leave this damn thing on. Most importantly why is it in this living room?

She answered the phone, but I continued messing with her as I rubbed my fingers on the outer part of her juicy engorged lips “hello?” She said trying to sound normal.

“Robin! I need you to get over here!!! King and Violet are missing!!” Ashley screamed through the phone.

I halted everything, and looked at Robin “ok baby I’m on my way” she said before hanging up.

“Babe I gotta go, that can’t happen again! I don’t care how much I want you. Your going to be on a very long punishment” she said point at the couch and then at me.

“Alright, alright damn. You want me to go with you?” I asked worried about her stressing herself especially now she’s pregnant.

“You think they’ll let you leave?” she asked heading into the room to get dressed.

“It’s a fam emergency babe, I don’t see why not. Imma throw on these sweats and go let me know. You on the other hand don’t stress my baby girl out you hear me” I said sternly.

“Ok Chris, I’ll relax” she said as she combed her thick hair into a ponytail.

Shit man, I was so close to getting up in that. I hope King and Violet are alright though. I’ll get what I’m supposed to get another time.


“Man I keep calling Angie, but she isn’t answering” Ty groaned slamming his phone on the chair.

I raised an eyebrow “well where is she?”

“I don’t know, some club appearance.

I sighed and shook my head “ok walk me through what happened again.”

"Aight so, me and Trey put the kids on the carousel. We turned around for two seconds to sign autographs, and when we turned back around they were gone! Ashley I’m the worst father in the world! I lost my son, my only son!” He said putting his face in his hands.

“Ok baby calm down we called the cops, and truth be told I think those kids are closer than we think” I said having a hunch.

It’s no way that story adds up. Someone was following them. First off everyone in the damn park were fans of Mike. It was a planned event. It’s no way in hell one of his fans with paid for tickets ran off with them kids. When I find out who it was I’m really going to beat some ass too.

Mike has been in such a great place. Personally and professionally lately, and now this?! Something ain’t right.

The doorbell rang, and I rushed to the door. Robin was there with Chris behind her, and I couldn’t help but smile. He really was trying this time to get his act together. What he did to my girl was fucked up, but I’m glad to see they’re working through it. Especially with baby number two on the way.

“Baby are you alright?” Robin asked rushing into my arms.

“Not at all my son and niece are gone. Mikey is a damn mess. I tried all day not to call you, but I couldn’t wait anymore. I’m sorry if I ruined a moment guys” I said looking at Chris.

“It’s cool Ash, she not getting away next time though believe that” he said walking in slapping my ass and running off.

“I hate your husband Robin” I said rolling my eyes.

She laughed “me too girl. Where’s Trey and India?”

“They went home, he isn’t handling this well either. Something just isn’t right Rob I can’t feel it” I said sure of myself.

“We’ll figure it out, I’m not feeling the story you told me on the drive here either” she said taking my hand walking into the living room.

The sooner they get my babies home the better. I can’t deal with Michael like this at all.


“Kevin, this is a horrible idea. Why would you kidnap my damn son, and your own child? I’m not going down for this shit I’m calling Ty!” I said through the phone.

This time I’m purely innocent. I wasn’t even in LA, I’m in Vegas. Kevin called me not to long ago talking about he had the kids. Ty is going to kill him. I don’t even know why he’s trying to take it there!

“You call him, and I swear I’ll tell him the truth about your little miscarriage Chyna fuck with your boy!”


He chuckled “you over here getting real bold over the phone huh Chy? Think about what your doing boo, I promise either way your going to be miserable.”

I sighed as he hung up. Why I gotta be the one involved in this shit when I did nothing? I swear to God if I go down for this I’m going to jail!

#Get Carolina To Taylor

Hey there Taylor! @taylorswift If you noticed this then you have already made me insanely happy. However, there is something I’ve been willing to tell you. (Please don’t scroll I know it might be boring to read such long text post but please just read it I love you)

First things first, I think since you followed me I have never introduced myself properly, so here’s a little something about me.

My name is Carolina Botana, I was born on March 13th  1999. I’m from Argentina, South America, big cat lover, Lion King fan and obsessed with a little something called music. Since I was 12 years old I’ve been a huge fan of your music, it has always been there for me. I know it’s a cliché phrase to say, but it literally has. HOWEVER, I’m not here to bore you about how much I admire you because you could easily tell that by just scrolling through my blog (not an order, just if you are curious you can)

The thing is, as I live in Argentina, I have never been able to attend to any of your concerts, I haven’t had the chance to meet you or see you in person, ever, because I can’t travel just to see you (my parents are not the biggest fans of concerts and music), and a I have participated on every possible contest to go to one of your concerts but I wasn’t lucky enough, and my biggest dream is to actually meet you. And this is what this post it’s all about. 

My family and I will be traveling to the US next month, January, and I’ll be in New York from the 13th to the 16th. So instead of continue making this huge cliché post about how much your talent amazes me and all of that. Why won’t we talk about all of that personally?! I KNOW YOU DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING TAYLAHH. For real, I could even bring my pegacorn costume we could have an amazing tea party all dressed up with Mer and Dibbles, we could bake some stuff (I LOVE baking) We could have a dance party all weird, go for a walk at central park, whatever you are up to, cause that’s what best friends do right (wink wink). So whatever, I hope if u read this and you got here we could actually hang out, I’m all for naps also or like riding a pony, I think seeing you on a pony will be the funniest thing ever (you know cause your legs are so long you would totally touch the floor while riding the ponyOHMYGOD) So yhea, this is a formal invitation/request to hang out with you, and I’ll wait for your answer! (Which could be bi*ch that aint never gonna happen and that’s okay you can totally say no we are in between friends)

I know you must receive and read this kind of post millions of times a day, but I was hoping you could consider meeting me, or just say hi to me or I don’t know throw a banana at me, I just really don’t care, but I’ll be glad to hang out with you. I’ll be at the US from the 28th of December to the 16th of January but I just put out the New York dates because I thought that would be where it’ll be easier for you and me to have a sleepover party? JK but for real I know you receive this kind of things every day, but it’s kind of my only shot at maybe getting  to meet you, so I don’t lose nothing by just trying

I know you go above and beyond for your fans, so here’s my shot at trying to be one of those lucky ones who get to hang out with you.

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to read this and for everything that you’ve done for me this past 5 years. I love you to the moon and back! See you soon (I hope so)

PS: If you are busy, or just don’t feel like it, I completely, totally understand, I’ll still lose all my chill whenever you do anything, like I lose my shit over stuff you do every day so whatever.

PS: I swear id love you to throw a banana to my face. I’ll bake you some brownies if you want to hang out with me. Thank you thank you thank you.


Signs As My Favorite FOB Lyrics
  • Aries: "In the end everything collides, My childhood, Spat back out the monster that you see" (My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark)
  • Taurus: "I'm just a notch in your bedpost, But you're just a line in a song" (Sugar We're Going Down)
  • Gemini: "I don't care what you think as long as it's about me, The best of us can find happiness in misery" (I Don't Care)
  • Cancer: "Head like a steel trap, I wish I didn't I didn't I didn't I didn't I didn't I didn't I didn't I don't just want to be a footnote in someone else's happiness" (Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet)
  • Leo: "Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean any of it, I just got too lonely, Lonely whoa, And in between being young and being right, You were my Versailles at night" (Fourth Of July)
  • Virgo: "I will sing to you every day, If it will take away the pain, Oh and I've heard you got it got it so bad, Cause I am the best you'll never have" (Miss Missing You)
  • Libra: "She's in a long black coat tonight, Waiting for me in the downpour outside, She's singing 'Baby Come Home' in a melody of tears while the rhythm of the rain keeps time" (Jet Pack Blues)
  • Scorpio: Stomp out this disaster town, You'll put your eyes to the sun and say I know, You're only blinding to keep back what the clouds are hiding" (The Carpal Tunnel Of Love)
  • Sagittarius: "But we are alive, Here in death valley, But don't take love off the table yet, Cause tonight it's just fire alarms and losing you" (Death Valley)
  • Capricorn: "I am an arms dealer, Fitting you with weapons in the form of words, And I don't really care which side wins, As long as the room keeps singing, That's just the business I'm in" (This Aint A Scene, It's An Arms Race)
  • Aquarius: "They say I only think in the form of crunching numbers, In hotel rooms collecting page six lovers" (Thnks Fr Th Mmrs)
  • Pisces: "You know time crawls on when you're waiting for the song to start, So dance alone to the beat of your heart" (The Phoenix)
boyfriend material: Michael

i need to get this off my chest. i can’t get over my ideas of what a good boyfriend michael would be

his idea of a romantic dinner would be going to a pizza parlor and he would make you laugh by tucking his napkin into his shirt but still end up somehow getting pizza sauce on his shirt and cheese stuck to his stubbly chin

and one day you’d come home early and find him taking a bubble bath and he’d just look at you and be like “what? i’m punk rock i swear” and you’d just say “do you want me to join you or should i give you some alone time” and maybe he’d throw bubbles at you and your clothes would be soaked so oops now you have to get in the tub with him but then he’d just hold out his arms to make sure you don’t slip when you get in and then cradle you or make bubble beards with the soap

and after living with him for a while you get a pet together (preferably a dog, i imagine him with a terrier or a puppy lab) and you’d be picking a name and he’d suggest things like Sausage or Daniel or Raphael. But then some days you’d walk into your bedroom and find him asleep with the dog on your bed

and if you ever fight, he’d run his fingers through his hair (whatever color it is at the time) and pace in your living room and you’d yell at him to leave if he didn’t want to stay, pointing at the door and sometimes even you’d throw his clothes at him. but mostly he’d look angry but then look half frustrated, half confused and lower his voice and tell you that that’s not what he wants, that he doesn’t want to leave. and he’d kiss you sometimes and have makeup sex with you on the couch, but other times he’d just pull you back to the bedroom and cuddle and talk so you both know where you stand or he’d sit you down at the table and pull out that pint of cookie dough ice cream that you’ve been saving for a special occasion. but no matter how the fight started, michael would always end it by saying “i don’t like fighting with you. i like it better when we love each other” and you’d say “we always love each other, mikey”

ill wrap this up bc it’s causing me extreme pleasure and pain and i dunno if i like it just yet

but yeah so then you’d go grocery shopping with michael and he’s the kind of inner kid that has to touch everything and try to put things in your cart. like you’d be bagging up some oranges or some shit and he’d come up to you and ask “can we get these?” and you’d be like “no we don’t need that” but then he’d bring back stuff and try to sneak it in the cart without you seeing it. then you’d be like “no, michael we already have pop tarts at home” or “no michael i’m not buying you a pack of pokemon cards” or “why do i need to buy a magazine with your face on it when i have the real thing to look at at home?” and when you’d finally make it out of the store after what feels like a lifetime of mikey asking for gummy worms, he’d try to take all your grocery bags in one trip or ride the shopping cart through the parking lot like it’s space mountain at disney world

last but not least i promise. i just really had to finish with this point.

sEX WITH MICHAEL GORDON CLIFFORD. i can just imagine how profusely the word “baby” would roll off his tongue. and how carefully his hands would skim up your sides, enjoying every bit of skin and curve and possibly play with your boobs a bit like level them in his hands and shit and you’d just be like “get on with it michael”. i also imagine he’s a fast undresser when it comes to sex. like if you were in the living room kissing and started to go to the bedroom he’d strip on the way down the hall. or teasingly give you a strip tease to a beat he makes but do it really silly so you laugh and tell him to come here and so he does and just kinda falls on top of you, smiling still when he starts to kiss you again. i also feel like he will always try to reassure you with his words like either saying how beautiful you look or asking how you’re doing and if you like it. and if you reached up to hold his face in your hands he’d just grin super wide bc he’s so happy to be yours and to be loved by you and make love to you. but then he’d also be into some kinky shit i think like def using handcuffs but he’d still make sure you like it and shit or he’d be into watching you pleasure yourself. and man if mikey aint good at eating da pussy then i’m the queen of england bc his lips would look damn good down there let me tell you. he’d give you kisses on your lady bits and all over your thighs and just savor tasting you. He’d surely take his sweet ass time and push your hands away if you try to touch him or yourself. and if i even think of the sight of your legs tossed over his shoulders with his mouth of your pink panther, i think i might just pass out right here. wow this part is long. lemme also address that motherfucker’s O face bc holy shit he’d look like a heavenly angel: eyes closed so tight that his face wrinkles around them and his mouth would hang open and his hands would grip tighter onto wherever he’s holding just to make sure you’re not going anywhere and when his breathing returns and he finally opens his eyes, he’d give you the laziest, appreciative smile and just say one word, either like “amazing” or your name

that’s it motherfucker i’m out.

also if you’re interested in me continuing this with more senarios or doing one for another one of the boys i’d love to. i like sharing my opinion