i admit this one is cheap

Here’s the full transcript of Mark talking Darkiplier in the livestream

(Time approx. 3 hours, 52 minutes to 4 hours, 4 minutes into the stream. And, yes, this took forever). Thought you’d like this, maybe.

I’ve bolded stuff I find especially interesting.

~~~~~~~

Mark: Long ago, a long time ago, I liked to do these scary edits because I just felt like doing scary edits and this is how Darkiplier got born. And then what happened was over time Darkiplier became less and less about the scary figure and more about this romantic figure, and it always rubbed me the wrong way. And I kind of shied away from Darkiplier for a while. And I really really really- if I was going to bring Darkiplier, and when we thought about this, we thought, okay there should be a Darkiplier route. And that was there from the beginning, and so when I wanted to do it I wanted to do it my way, and I wanted to do it right, and I wanted to have this unending level of creepiness. And at the same time, I didn’t want to step on the toes of Antisepticeye because I know there’s a big fan base of that, and I didn’t want to get in the way of that at all and I really don’t care that there’s more than one dark personalities of people. But when I saw the opportunity to have this character here, I spent like 8 hours editing this, like just meticulously every single RBG. This is a layer, we green screened this one, I color corrected it, I separated the RBG layers I added the shakes and glitchiness every frame. I worked on the voice, too. The voice took me the longest to figure out. Like the shakes! And my computer was dying this whole time cause I put my effects on here.

Tyler: The amount of time you had to spend rendering this.

Mark: And so, the audio’s actually three separate layers. It would have been two, but Kathryn helped me out on that one to make it more clear. It’s a normal pitched layer that’s edited, echoed, reverbed, mastered, and convoluted which means it’s just thrown off to the left and right, and then it’s a deep layer of that. But then to make it really come together- it didn’t live without this center channel that wasn’t convoluted but was centered. But getting that voice right was so pinnacle, so paramount to what I wanted to come out of this. And we did like thirty minutes of shooting various versions of me talking to the camera and I wanted to pick the exact dialogue that really kind of gave away my idea of what Dark is in not a terribly obvious way.

Tyler: The other thing, this was supposed to all be one video.

Mark: But YouTube annotations, this new version doesn’t allow you to link the same video multiple times, so these are literally the old videos that I first did when Darkiplier first came about, like, these are the ones, especially this one here, and then this is my cheap knockoff Darkiplier.

Amy: Canon Darkiplier.

Mark: Canon Darkiplier. And I’m going to readily admit something. I joked about Darkiplier because it didn’t seem like something people wanted to take seriously, and I’m okay with that on certain aspects but it had diverged into multiple different facets and multiple different personalities, and everyone had their own version of Darkiplier, and I thought it was hilarious that, “Hey, here’s my version of Darkiplier, and he’s an idiot.” Like, he’s just this weird emo kid. And then I stepped back from that, like, I stepped back. And you can even- in that time, when I was doing those videos, in this era, I was not very happy. I was kind of… I was pessimistic about a lot of things. And I felt like that bled through in a lot of things I did. And that’s why even October of last year I literally made Darkiplier an emo character. And then when we were getting to this, I thought about it like very carefully and I thought back to why I did it originally, and I did it originally because, well, Darkiplier wasn’t even a thing. Darkiplier was not a thing when I was making those videos. I just wanted to make some creepy stuff. And then I thought about that, and I was like if I want to make a statement about who this is, I need to own that and I need to put something out there that is not ambiguous, because I realize that’s where I went wrong. I didn’t have a solid character so obviously, people would come up with their own versions, they would fill in the gaps where they saw fit. So, when I made this I had to embrace it fully and fine-tune it down to exactly where I wanted. When you choose the “fake” choice carrying through to this one, I really wanted that to come through, except at the end to this video, where it gets silly, but that’s because the real me comes in and the real me’s an idiot. And I’ve actually watched this over and over again because I’m listening to the takes I put in here and I’m listening to my inflection and my tone, my demeanor and I’m imagining like how to refine it better next time when I bring him back, like how to do it better.

Tyler: I remember now, I set up the table.

Mark: Yeah, you did. You set up the table we had to change it out for clear glasses because the green screen was reflecting through. But yeah, even this, like the intersplices of anger, and this is me getting real deep in the meta of Darkiplier, like if that’s even a thing that can be- let me just pause it here. I don’t read too much into this but if there’s something that I want to take seriously, I want to actually do right. So, in my mind, Darkiplier is an entirely different person from me. But, much like Warfstache, doesn’t obey the laws of physics. He exists in another world entirely and bleeds through into this one. This is sounding really nerdy of me.

Tyler: I remember the Warfstache talk.

Mark: So Completely unironically, Darkiplier is a completely separate entity from who I am. But, he admires what I’ve accomplished, and he’s very much… people picked up on this, and people thought it was really creepy, because it’s what I wanted. He’s a social manipulator. He is literally, 100% manipulative. He leads you into this false sense of security, and he wants you to trust him because he wants to take advantage of you. That is literally what I wanted for Darkiplier. And how creepy and scary that actually is from the surface. Especially in this first bit, where he says, “If dinner is what you want, then I can provide.” And I wanted this to come across in a seductive way while also masking, like, this burning rage inside that breaks through the suave nature of it. That was my clue to reveal he’s not your friend. He’s not here to help you. He’s here to use you. And that also came across when I was thinking about, like, the effects. Like, his image shatters, he separates because he’s not entirely kept together, you know what I mean? So, I wanted like the drastic impacts of the rage pulling back suddenly to the calm nature and the demeanor and this last one, I was thinking was especially telling. It’s not me trying to break through, it’s his shell cracking.

Kathryn: I love that.

Mark: Yeah? It’s my favorite of all of them.

Kathryn: That’s one’s my favorite. I have legitimately just gone and watched that bit.

Mark: Yeah?

Kathryn: It’s really good.

Mark: Oh, thank you.

Kathryn: I really like that.

Mark: Yeah. And number 1 the visuals work hard on this one, but nailing the audio- that high-pitched ringing that a lot of people were like wow that really hurts my ears, that was by design. That was supposed to hurt because listening to him- a lot if inspiration for him comes from G-man from Half-life 2 and 1, like this weird interdimensional person that seems human but is obviously not and doesn’t obey the laws of physics, and is just like this shell of a person that’s in a suit. Not a suit, literally a human suit, and is trying to figure out how to puppet it right that you believe him, but he’s really good at it. And that’s where the scariness of Darkiplier, I think, really comes from, is because he seems like someone you can trust, and he will manipulate you, and take advantage of you, and literally use you, and to me that’s terrifying. Like that’s the antithesis of what I want to be and so if I’m going to make an opposite version of me, he’s gonna be the fucking worst. Like worse than any romantic story can ever bring about. He’s fucking awful.

Amy: It was convenient, though, I like the way it goes from Relax to this, like the video “Relax,” because then people were not expecting this. But it’s so nice to have it on Valentine’s Day. It works so well.

Mark: And then came the bullshit transition that we had to do. So, this is comical in a way.

Amy: It doesn’t drag it though.

Mark: Yeah it doesn’t drag. You get the scary. Tyler’s here-

Tyler: In Mark’s suit, which I have fit in, but not the pants.

Mark: He didn’t fit, we forgot to get a tie, like, we printed out a mask, and I looked at this and was like I could try to make this creepy, and then I went, I objectively can’t. Let me throw in some punch sound effects.

Tyler: I have to make sure, cause-

Mark: He couldn’t see shoot.

Tyler: No, I couldn’t, and I had to keep moving the mask cause there was one time we did this that the mask ended up completely on the side of my head and I was just like, hey Mark, you can’t touch my face.

Amy: The convenient thing about this, though, with all the glitches is that you can hide stuff with it.

Tyler: Yeah, and there’s a reason I never let go of Mark I have no clue where anything is.

Mark: Yeah, oh man. Oh, this, oh my god. Oh, and secret Easter egg- you know who Dark is because he doesn’t have a shadow. Totally intentional and by design.

Amy: His toes are missing too, but.

Mark: Shh he doesn’t have toes he’s so scary.

~~~~~~

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Lightsaber Battle - Pietro Maximoff x Reader

Words: 1358
Pairing: Pietro Maximoff x Reader
Featuring: Tony Stark
Warnings: swearing, maybe
Requested by anon
Pietro and the reader having a lightsaber battle in the middle of the toy section
Summary: What happens when you and Pietro are in the toy section and Pietro is pracitcally a toddler in a store? Chaos ensues.
Authors Note: this was so much fun omf

Pietro Maximoff / Full Masterlist

Ao3


“Target could be my second home,” You marveled as you walked into the doors of the large store.

Pietro laughed. “Well, you do come here a lot.”

“Because I love it!” You squealed and walked to where the one-dollar section was.

With a roll of the eyes, he put his hand on your shoulder. “That, and Tony kicks us out of the base a lot.”

Shrugging, you picked up random things in the one-dollar bins. Tony does kick you two out of the base a lot, mainly because when you don’t have anything to do, you annoy someone until you are entertained and come up with something to do. He’s usually the easiest to annoy, not to mention that he gets annoyed really easily, and his reactions are typically the funniest.

You walked up to the nearest employee, doing like you and Pietro always do. “Excuse me, miss, where are the toasters?” You linked onto Pietro’s arm. “My husband is really worried about the fact that we do not have a toaster and I’m afraid he’s going to break down if he doesn’t see a toaster soon,” You told the girl who seemed to be a bit older.

She quickly directed you to where the toasters would be, and once she was out of sight, the two of you broke into a fit of laughter. “That was a good one. I’m really passionate about toasters,” He laughed. It was almost a tradition after the many times you two have been to Target recently, asking the staff random and strange questions. Sometimes he was your son, sometimes you were a random stranger, and today he was your husband. Of course, you two were only friends, which made it only funnier.

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Analysis of the Ending of Okja

I have to admit, at first I felt a little disappointed by the ending of Okja. ALF doesn’t end up making a difference- food production continues, and we know from our own society that Nancy is right. If the food is cheap, the majority of people will eat it despite knowing the Food, Inc. story behind its production. I think the ending is meant for the majority of people, the bystanders who will be outraged by factory-farm conditions but still eat cheap meat (myself being one of them). Mija doesn’t free all the super pigs. She doesn’t join ALF. She goes home with Okja, her unchanged goal from the beginning of the movie. As movie watchers, I think we all to some degree wish she had done more- but is it her responsibility? Could she even make a difference? Mija’s and ALF’s inability to make a difference in the large scale of food production reminds us just how vast and inescapable the current system is. There’s too many people willing to buy cheap meat no matter the dark reality, and thus the system will continue to exist. Nancy understands that, while Lucy doesn’t. The film holds an audience that is complicit in this system accountable. It encourages viewers not to necessarily go vegan, but that ethical food production is possible (as seen with Mija, especially that moment when she puts the young fish back in the water, which is echoed in her saving the young super pig at the end). The enemy is a mass system of mass production that can’t be changed by individuals and groups like ALF. Fighting a mass system requires mass change- a change in an entire population. And maybe that’s what Okja hopes to produce.

Arguing the Case For Dennis Reynolds’ Return

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is not known for being a kind show to its characters. We’re supposed to derive enjoyment, or at least a sense of schadenfreude, from seeing how miserable the Gang’s lives are and how rarely they achieve happiness. That said, making Dennis leave now, after the events of this season, seems needlessly cruel to me–and not just to the characters, but to the show’s audience, as well.

Dennis Reynolds is a rarity among television characters. To see a mentally ill character depicted so boldly, his disorder named and his characterization consistently written to match that diagnosis, is a very unusual thing to see in television. And for that diagnosis to be borderline personality disorder, instead of the more commonly-seen depression and anxiety, makes it all the more meaningful, especially to mentally ill viewers who don’t often get to see themselves depicted so honestly on television.

It’s been so wonderfully gratifying to see the arc of Dennis’ mental health throughout the show, culminating in him going on meds this season and making real progress in dealing with his emotions. It sends a message of hope and recovery to other people suffering from mental illness and disorders. After all, if a person as “irredeemable” as Dennis Reynolds can seek medication and therapy to improve his mental health, surely the rest of us can as well.

On a narrative level, it seems a shame to ditch Dennis permanently now that he does have this more profound level of emotional depth. His outburst about his “big feelings” in The Gang Tends Bar was an incredibly touching thing, and very faithful to the experiences of real people who have BPD. With so much more depth and room for Dennis to grow now that he’s able to admit and talk about his feelings, sending him away the way he left tonight feels like a cheap ending to one of the most satisfying character arcs I’ve ever seen on television.

This isn’t the only reason I ask the writers to consider bringing Dennis back, however. There is another reason having him leave now is unnecessarily cruel to the audience, especially the (surprisingly large!) LGBTQ following that Sunny has attracted.

As early as season 3, subtext has been laid that, not only is Mac gay, but that he’s in love with Dennis. What started as a simple, joking “I love you” in The Gang Gets Held Hostage has become so much more.

We all thought it was doomed to staying in the realm of subtext forever, though; one of the main conceits of Sunny is that the characters will never develop and improve. Thus, it would be impossible for Mac to ever truly accept himself and come out of the closet as the series wore on, made evident by his false coming out in the season 11 finale.

But then, something incredible happened. We complained about how cruel it was to out a character and then force him back into the closet when that’s a narrative that’s all too common in real life. Sunny is cruel, but it shouldn’t be needlessly so, and in a year that went on to bring so much worry and strife into the lives of LGBTQ people, putting Mac back in the closet felt like salt in the wound.

The incredible part about our complaining is that the writers listened. Charlie Day recently said in an interview that bringing Mac back out of the closet in season 12–permanently, this time–was the right thing to do, considering the social climate we’re living in right now. Furthermore, he said that they did it partially because of the feedback they received after the season 11 finale. They defied the show’s main conceit to do right by the LGBTQ community.

As momentous as Mac’s staying out is on its own, it brought with it an exciting new possibility: the possibility to confront his feelings for Dennis head-on. His closeted status was the only thing ever really stopping the writers from really delving into it before. And, as we’ve seen from the second half of season 12, they’re not at all afraid to explore the topic in a more indepth way, as Mac’s PTSDee dream sequence and his heartfelt gift to Dennis in The Gang Tends Bar showed. More interesting than even that, though, was the possibility that Dennis might return those feelings.

More than once, we’ve seen that Dennis does care about Mac much more than he usually lets on. And we know that Dennis is probably bisexual, both from statements made by the showrunners at ComicCon and from Dennis’ behavior within the show itself. Since Mac came out in Hero or Hate Crime?, the possibility of Mac and Dennis’ relationship existing in a more romantic context has been explored, culminating in the two of them actually pretending to be together in tonight’s season finale, and all-but open confirmation that Mac is in love with Dennis.

This is why, I believe, it’s so needlessly cruel to permanently remove Dennis from the equation now. I do not mean to imply that I want to see Mac and Dennis in a happy, committed relationship–that’s never been the Sunny way. But it seems unfair to me that Dee and Charlie got their moment of romance in The Gang Misses the Boat, when Mac and Dennis have it torn away from them just as it becomes possible for them to have it in the first place. At the risk of sounding like an impassioned young gay man, it hurts to see a romantic relationship between two men dangled in front of me and then torn away like this. More than painful, it’s practically queerbaiting, an incredibly harmful practice that’s sadly all too common in today’s television landscape.

On the off chance that anyone involved with the writing of Always Sunny reads this: firstly, thank you for getting this far. Secondly, I urge you to consider, again, the social implications of making Dennis leave forever just as he makes a huge breakthrough in his mental health and just as it becomes possible for his relationship with Mac to be explored in a more romantic context. Dangling Mac and Dennis in a relationship (literally) before viewers, only to yank that away, is incredibly painful to watch, especially for us young LGBTQ viewers who often struggle enough with staying positive just living our daily lives. And I personally know a great many people with BPD who have found themselves in Dennis– which isn’t something they can say about many other TV show characters.

I know that, as young LGBTQ people and as young mentally ill people (and oftentimes, both), we are not the core demographic for Sunny, and I know that we never will be. However, I also know that the showrunners do want to do right by us, and that they do have our best interests at heart as allies. It is with this knowledge that I ask, if any of you are reading this, to consider bringing Dennis back in season 13, whenever that may be.

I know that Sunny will not have a happy ending; it completely goes against the show’s thesis. But Mac coming out for good in season 12 has proven that the show’s thesis can be defied in special circumstances, especially when it’s for the greater societal good. I am not asking for Mac and Dennis to get married, but I am asking you to consider the cruelty of resolving more than a decade of Mac’s romantic feelings for Dennis in this way, just as it became possible for them to become something more. And more than that, I am asking you to consider the impact Dennis Reynolds has had on the lives of so many mentally ill people, who almost never get to see themselves represented on television as accurately as they have with Dennis.

I trust all of you as artists and writers, and as well-meaning and thoughtful people in general, to consider my words as you move forward with planning for season 13. Again, if you made it this far, thank you for listening, and I look forward to seeing what the future holds, whatever that may be.

anonymous asked:

hihihi i love ur neighbor au SO MUCH the shownu had me dyiNG it's so accurate, and the spicy changkyun one BOI i died anyways can i possibly ask for the last of the series, a cute hyungwon one?? Thank u and bless u :')

the other members can be found here:
wonho / shownu / kihyun / minhyuk /changkyun / jooheon 

  • owns a one room apartment because it’s cheap and he doesn’t really need a kitchen,,,,when kihyun was helping him look at apartments hyungwon was just like “i need there to be room for a king sized bed.” and kihyun was like “oh but this place even has an extra closet it just costs a bit mo-” “kihyun,,,,,,,all i need is a place to sleep.”
  • has a full length mirror in the hallway and openly admits that he checks himself out in it. doesn’t openly admit that he’ll sometimes dance in front of it when he’s getting ready too 
  • his brother begged him to not put up the photo of him when he first enlisted in the army but hyungwon,,,,being the person he is,,,,hung that photo right up next to his nightstand 
  • but it’s cute,,,he hung up photos of his family alongside it because no matter what he misses them a lot
  • has a copy of every magazine he was a model in and keeps them in a stack on his bookshelf alongside a bunch of books on fashion and traveling,,,,,
  • every time his friends come over they pull out a magazine and tease hyungwon over his modeling but hyungwon’s like yall just mad because you’re not this beautiful 
  • his coffeemaker is the most expensive thing in his apartment 
  • has a mug that says ‘until this mug is empty, im not technically awake’,,,,it was a gift from minhyuk 
  • fashionable hyungwon only exists in the streets. when he’s at home it’s big old t-shirt, froggy pajama pants, and froggy slippers,,,,,,,,i like to think he also owns a froggy pillow just because hyungwon + frogs is a meme or whatever but it’s also super cute,,,,,,,
  • wears glasses around the building and people don’t recognize who he is until he takes them off and they’re like OH it’s the model from floor eleven!!! and hyungwon is like slinking his way back to the elevator with very un-model like posture LOL
  • you’ve known ever since he moved in because when he was trying to get all his boxes up to his apartment 
  • he was going at the most painstakingly slow speed,,,like literally one box at a time,,,,,and you felt bad watching this dude with his noodle arms try to move all by himself
  • so you offered to help and hyungwon had tried to say it was ok but then you’d lifted like three boxes and he was like you know what please do help me lol
  • and after you two were done you pointed at your door across the hall and you were like “im your neighbor, neighbors should help each other!! since i helped you today,,,,”
  • and you had looked him and down and hyugwon had tilted his head in confusion and you were like 
  • “since i helped you today, promise me if i ever need your help idk,,,,since you’re so tall,,,,,fixing a lightbulb or something,,,you’ll help me? deal?”
  • and you’d stuck your hand out and hyungwon,,,,although usually unwilling to sign himself up to doing something aside from taking a nap,,,,had shook your hand back 
  • and since then you’ve just you know,,,, been good neighbors to each other 
  • you always see each other in the evening when you’re coming back from work and hyungwon will already have his glasses on and his hair a mess and you always giggle because he seems like the opposite of a model and he’ll just shrug because doesn’t he actually look better this way?
  • and it’s just very casual and friendly and you say goodbye to each other as you go into your apartments
  • but one night hyungwon notices that you’re not there when he’s waiting for the elevator but he shrugs it off because??? maybe you have overtime or you’re out with friends
  • but when he’s home, already laying down reading his favorite webtoon e looks at the time and it’s like,,,,close to midnight
  • and just to make sure you’re ok,,,he gets up and goes to knock on your door
  • deciding that he’d rather just make up some excuse how he ran out of toilet paper and isn’t just you know,,,,worried
  • but then??? you don’t answer
  • and hyungwon tells himself that he’s not worried and he’s not panicking over you,,,his neighbor,,,,,,who he obviOUSLY hasn’t been fond of since you helped him out,,,,,like haha what no,,,,
  • and that’s totally not the reason he goes outside of the building in his slippers at like 1am just to see if you’re coming home really late,,,,like noooo he’s going to the corner store to get himself a really super late night snack
  • and as he’s coming out of the store, untouched ice-cream in hand he sees you
  • and you’re just walking really slowly, yawning against your palm because your boss made you stay to finish up documents that aren’t even a part of your job and you just,,,, really want some sleep
  • and when you look over you see hyungwon,,,,in his froggy slippers with ice-cream and you’re like “hey,,,,why are you up this late?” and hyungwon just snorts because he’s like i could ask you the same thing
  • and you stick your tongue out but you’re like my devil of a boss made me do work that’s not even mine can you bELIEVE IT
  • and hyungwon is still holding that ice-cream,,,,his heartbeat finally settling down at the sight of your face 
  • and you notice how he’s quietly just staring at you and you look down at his hand and you’re like “the ice-creams gonna melt???” and he’s like i don’t really care 
  • and you’re like cool can i have it???? and you grab it and unwrap it and hyungwon can’t help but smile to himself and you’re like eating, the glum look on your face gone
  • and you and hyungwon get into the elevator and you’re like “so seriously, why are you up right now? you told me once you could sleep for like 29 hours!!!” and hyungwon is like i wanted a late night snack and you’re like dude,,,,,im eating your late night snack c’mon tell me the real reason
  • and hyungwon adjusts his glasses with his hand and looks away and you’re like ???????? and he’s like “sorry,,,i was worried,,,i guess,,,”
  • and you almost choke on your icecream because wait,,,,
  • worried??????
  • about?????????? you????
  • hyungwon who could sleep through a thunderstorm, who forgot your first name for the first three months you knew each other, who as never told you he’s been worried about /anything/,,,,,,,,
  • hyungwon was worried about you?
  • and you get to your floor and you’re both silent but you’re like,,,,,well!!!don’t worry because im fine,,,,,,im gonna go sleep though~~ ok bye!!
  • and hyungwon sees you disappear inside without another word and he doesn’t really know what to think of it so he goes inside too
  • but you’re,,,,,,,standing in your hallway,,,,cheeks pink and you’re like wait,,,,does he,,,,,does he like me,,,,,,,,did he just not want to admit it,,,??
  • and in the morning you and hyungwon bump into each other and hyungwon is obviously acting awkward and you’re like “give me your phone” and he’s like huh
  • and you’re like “you said you were worried about me right, well here’s my number. just text me the next time you’re worried. plus,,,,,,,,i can text you if i ever get worried.”
  • and hyungwon’s looking at you in shock and you’re like ,,,,, getting a bit red and you’re like,,,,,,,heY we made a promise before about helping each other we can make the same promise about worrying too,,,,,that or you know,,,,,
  • and the door opens to the lobby but hyungwon doesn’t get out and neither do you and he’s like “,,,you know,,,what?” and you’re like,,,,,,you know,,,,,,how couples just worry about each other without a promise because you like the person so you worry oh god im rambling
  • and before you know it hyungwon leans in and presses his lips to yours and you’re like !!!!!!!! i guess,,,he agrees on the couple thing!!!!!!!!
  • but the doors close before either of you can get out and the elevator is going back up and you pull back and you’re like hYUNGWON im goinG TO be LATE for the bUS now,,,
  • and he shrugs and pulls you around the waist closer to him and he’s like more time for us to kiss-
  • and you’re like no no no you don’t get to kiss me since you made me late ):< 
  • hyungwon: :’( ok ill kiss you after we both comeback from work 
Hoshidan Festival: Saizo and Kanna Parent-Child Convo

HOOOOOLY SHIIIIIIIIT THIS WAS THE CUTEST FATHER-SON CONVO AS WELL AS THE MOST HILARIOUS SO FAR OMG. SAPPY HUSBANDO SAIZO IS PURE GOLD.

I deeply enjoyed translating this one. It’s hilarious to see that if Saizo is Kanna’s father, then Kanna takes after… his Uncle Kaze the most. His dear Uncle Kaze who is a bit of a manipulative tease and has his brother wrapped around his finger. Seems that it runs in the family, hmmm? Asugi also could probably wrap his father around his finger if he outright tried.

(It may be purely localization, but if you marry him, Saizo will confess that he’s ticklish in a lovers’ bonding quote… and then if you wake him up roughly, he’ll panic and then say “I was afraid that you were Kaze for a second.” Looks like Kaze was the mischievous little brother type, eh Saizo?)

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Time to Teach You a Lesson - Pt. 2

Genre; Hella smut 

Length; 2,100+ words

Kink(s); exhibitionism, Daddy! kink, Sir! kink, impact play, face fucking, cuckolding, sadism, etc.

Originally posted by 1wice

Previously; 

Taemin’s cheeks flushed a bright red as he sat there avoiding eye contact with him, staying completely silent.
His silence brought a smug smile to Kihyun’s face, “So babygirl..” He said as his darkened gaze loomed over your helpless form. “What do you think I should do?” He playfully asked as he tugged on the waistband of your skirt, leaning closer to you- allowing his plump lips to ghost over your clothed breasts causing you to shudder in response.

“Should I tease you, edging you every time you come close to cumming until those gorgeous tears of yours stain your face? or-” He snickered, peering up at you as he watched you hungrily lick your berry stained lips, “Should I pound into that pretty little cunt of yours until your near fucking unconscious?”


“I- I don't know..” You mousily replied, gulping anxiously as his intimidating gaze scanned over you. 
You had never once seen him like this; his aggression, his near animalistic possessiveness- just everything about him had your arousal on overdrive. 

“You don’t know?” Ki deeply growled, taking a deep breath as he neared the nape of your neck, “Well I suppose I can do both.” He added, wickedly grinning as he licked a broad strip along your jawline before sniffing the air around you once more.
“You’re so fucking horny for me, aren’t you little girl?” He rumbled, his large hands bruisingly gripping your hips. “I can smell you from here..” 

“Uh huh..” You whimpered, rapidly nodding. 
Suddenly, his palm connected with your cheek, forcing out a pained yelp, “Speak correctly, little one.” He added as he gently began massaging the reddening spot, “If not I’ll just have to punish you instead, do you want that little girl?” He icily purred, “Do you want Daddy you punish you?” 

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“Gotham was a dark and dangerous town, full of riddles. Riddles just waiting to be solved, solved by someone clever enough. Someone like me, Edward Nygma, private detective. Riddles are my meal ticket, my forte, and I must admit…my one deepest obsession. You can keep your alcoholic amusements, your drug-induced diversions, your dangerous dames, those cheap thrills waiting on every corner of this godforsaken city. Give me a good riddle, something for my brain to chew on, something to challenge the very depths of my staggering intellect and…well, what more does a man of my intimidating and well-renowned genius need? …Besides money, of course. Please keep paying me. [coughs awkwardly]”

Was watching The Maltese Falcon awhile ago and this came to mind– a couple of my favorite things: 1) film noir, 2) urban grunge, 3) Edward Nygma (bonus for running a private detective racket with noir-esque internal monologues). Don’t have much experience in painting urban backgrounds, so this was kind of an experiment…

naruto likes to visit sasuke and sakura whenever he gets the chance, telling kakashi he’s on a leave from his hokage training (“you can’t do that, naruto. we have a budget meeting next tuesday? which you set?”) and telling his wife he’ll be back soon (“ah, right, sasuke and sakura. again.”). sakura will let him know when they’re somewhere he might want to come see them and within the day, naruto is on his way to their location.

they go out for dinner and have a few drinks and when they’re all ready to settle in for the night, sakura signals their waiter for the bill. she pulls out her wallet when they get it and although naruto makes a grab for it, she smiles at him and tells him this is on her.

on her.

when sakura walks up to the counter to pay, naruto turns to sasuke and finds him casually finishing off the rest of his drink. which sakura paid for. which he didn’t even try to pay for.

now, many dates with ino taught naruto that while he didn’t need to necessarily pay for the full bill, he was at least supposed to offer. 

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Dust, Diamonds: Part I (Levi/Reader)

PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 3

Summary: Ever since your youths, the two of you have been quite the pair: the toddler son of a prostitute and the child-thief who protected him; a thug who could waltz and a whore who could kill; humanity’s strongest soldier and an officer’s mistress. And now, after years of separation: diamond and dust.

Word count: ~12.5K (sorry)

Notes: TONS of fluff, mentions (but no graphic descriptions of) sex work and grooming, non-graphic sex scene (again not of sex work)


8

You were the second person to find Miss Ackerman’s corpse. 

You noticed the stench before anything else. As soon as the ripe odour hit your nose, smelling of something between rotting meat, shit, and cheap perfume, you knew. The bread and canned soup that you had worked so hard to steal for her fell to the ground, your attention fully on the figure in the bed. You couldn’t recognise her anymore: impossibly still, emaciated, and pallid. The body looked like Kuchel Ackerman, you thought, but it also didn’t look human. She had always been lively even her in fragility, all gentle smiles and porcelain skin. Staring at her sunken eyes and soiled sheets, all you could think about was the lovely smile she had given you when she first took you in, and how this corpse did not resemble her in the least.

In the corner of your eye, a shadow moved. You glanced back, and your breath stilled momentarily.

Levi was the first to speak.

“I don’t know what to do.” He looked at you, brows drawn back, dried tear stains tracking through the dirt on his face. Even though he was alive, his eyes looked as sunken as his mother’s.

Helplessly, you glanced back at the body one last time. You wanted badly for this to be a nightmare, to find yourself waking up into a world where Miss Ackerman was recovering from her illness and she and Levi were waiting patiently for you to bring back some food.

But even at your young age, you knew that you could not pretend: fantasies got you nowhere in the Underground.

Smoothly, you picked up the bread and canned soup, and then you set the two down before Levi. His fingers were thin and cold in your hands, and as you rubbed your thumb along his bony knuckles, his small body trembled.

“We survive.” You swallowed. “Even if we are alone.”


15

You had never trusted Kenny the way that Levi did. Not quite. Even though you were barely in your teens, you were practiced in reading the faces of men: a talent, the brothel owner often remarked, that you must have inherited from your mother and Miss Ackerman. Consequently, you knew the whole range of men that resided in the Underground, and you could spot a coward from a mile away.

When Kenny disappeared, you were not at all surprised. 

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The Day I Met Paul

A/N: happy mclennon day! this is just a small tidbit that i wrote to celebrate. enjoy

The day I met Paul.

It didn’t seem like a big deal.

The most exciting thing for me on July 6th, 1957 was the fact that my skiffle group, The Quarrymen, were playing a small gig. But little did I realize, meeting the slightly chubby boy with a guitar slung across his back would change my life.

Forever.

I cherish that day more than anything else in the entire world.

He was quite cocky, yknow? I knew later on when I had finally gotten to know Paul, that his cockiness was his defence mechanism because he was nervous. I asked him if he was any good, and he replied,

“I’m alright,”

With a grin on his face that I would much sooner than later fall in love with.

It didn’t make sense, when two people such as Paul and I came together, but then again I disagree. We made sense. We fit together.

Chalkandcheese chalkandcheese chalkandcheese.

We fit together.

Chalkandcheese chalkandcheese chalkandcheese.

I must admit I laughed when I saw him. It wasn’t a Billy Shears type of love at first sight, though I am certain it happens all the time. He was rather chubby as I said, and his eyebrows. Lord help me, his eyebrows. So prim and proper, as though he had just finished plucking them.

“I’m Paul.”

“I’m John.”

Chalkandcheese chalkandcheese chalkandcheese.

If I could relive any day of my life, it wouldn’t be the day I met Paul, mind you. I like to look back on that day for what it was. A broken lonely boy whose Mummy and Daddy left him, meeting a smart young boy with a dead Mummy. That brought us closer, but it was more so the music.

Our music was our way of expressing our soft feelings that we couldn’t quite admit, realistically. Sitting on the floor of Forthlin Road, mirroring our hands on our cheap old guitars. The music that flowed out was the way our love sounded.

Then, we fell in love.

Hard.

The day I realized I was in love with him was one of the worst days I’ve ever had. It’s not everyday you realize something like that, let alone with your best mate.

But, the day he told me he was in love with me would be the day I relived, yknow, if I could relive one.

He was angry with me.

We played at the Cavern and I was drunk, hammered, right out of this world. I kept messing up. I kept telling Paul,

“It doesn’t matter Macca, they’re not listenin’ anyway!”

After the show we piled into our dressing room and he was silent, sitting, waiting, stirring until the other lads went for a pint. And then,

Well. That’s not the day I’m discussing with you now, is it?

The day I met Paul was the day my life really began. The day my life had meaning. The beginning of the end, really.

“We’ll get back to you.”

I tried to make sure Paul knew I was the leader. I was the leader of the group. He couldn’t come in and mess about. Which as we all now know, the beautiful little bugger did just that.

I felt a shift in my universe when I heard that boy sing. My knees nearly buckled and my heart stopped for several moments. I composed myself well, and convinced myself and Shotton, who noticed, it was just the pints catching up to me.

He was going to be my songwriting partner. It was written in the stars when we were born. Our paths were meant to cross, merge, become one long and winding road. To nowhere.

His voice was smooth and full, it was soothing but yet exciting and crazy all at the same time. I had been overwhelmed with countless emotions, yknow, not to be too soft.

I thought about him as soon as the door closed behind his nice little arse. I thought about him as the lads and I continued to drink. I thought about him on my drunken stumble home to Mendips, on my lazy excuse for sneaking up the stairs to my room. I thought about him while I lied in bed.

Hell, I thought about him every single day until the day I died.

Still think about him.

I hope he thinks of me, now and then.

I think of his cheeky smile, his soft dark hair, his perfect eyebrows and the laughter behind his eyes. I think about his voice, his stupid jokes that I hated to admit were, in fact, very funny. I think about the way his fingers made such a beautiful sound come out of any instrument he picked up.

I think of everyday we spent together. Every brief touch, every long touch, every quick glance, every long stare that could fade into the night. Just staring.

I think of July 6th, 1957 because that’s the bloody day I met Paul fucking McCartney, and I’ve never been more thankful for anything in my entire life.

If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true?
And help me understand?

He did. He helped me, he fell in love with me. I fell in love with him. We didn’t understand, but we could always sit down and sing. Snog. Anything. Paul saved my life, he brought me life. He brought me the sun, the stars, laughter, happiness and most importantly he brought me love.

Of course, I know what you’re thinking. Don’t worry, Johnny is getting to it.

We brought each other a lot of grief, misery and broken heartedness. But, why would I think about that now?

I don’t see him anymore. I have to remember the best parts of our relationship.

I miss him. I miss July 6th 1957.

The day I laid eyes on an innocent little school boy.

The day I laid eyes on a learning musician and singer.

The day I laid eyes on a fellow song writer.

The day I met Paul.

She Wears My RIng

Dedicated to @raptorlily​ because she really seemed to like this idea when I floated it past her earlier this week.  Ao3 link 


Betty Cooper is not the kind of girl who gets in a huff about jewelry. She has the little key necklace her mother gave her at 13. She has the little silver studs she always wears. There’s the occasional change in earrings and sometimes a bracelet or two. But she’s never concerned herself with expensive trinkets or shiny baubles.

Until she’s out shopping with Veronica Lodge one Saturday a few weeks before graduation.

They decided to have a best friend’s day. Blowouts at Chez Salon. High tea at Penelope’s. Vintage shopping at Riverdale’s (admittedly small) selection of good vintage and consignment shops.

Betty is feeling bright and bubbly. She doesn’t want to jinx it but everything feels pretty… Perfect.

After everything they’ve been through the last couple of years, they’re all so close to graduating and getting out of Riverdale. All of them are planning on being in New York in some way with Betty and Jughead both getting into Columbia. Betty couldn’t be more excited.

Betty and Veronica have gone through two shops already without buying anything, but Betty’s fine with that. The experience of it, spending time with her best friend is more important to her. Plus, she’s trying to save up her money for when she has to pay New York rent on her apartment. The apartment she and Jughead will be living in together.

Veronica is combing through the small collection of retro dresses when something catches Betty’s eye. It’s a dull silver ring with little crown arches around one half. Underneath the arches are a band of notches with three white stones set in a smooth finish at the bottom.

Betty’s enchanted.

She reaches out a finger and traces the glass covering the ring.

“Girl.”

Betty’s head snaps up and a blush steals its way across her cheeks when she sees Veronica’s cocked eyebrow.

“Sorry. Did you say something V?”

“I asked what had your attention but I see now. Does everything with crowns remind you of your boy?”

“Not everything.”

Betty knocks shoulders with Veronica who knocks her back. Veronica looks back to the ring inside of the case.

“It’s a cute ring.” She admits.

“Yeah. I think it’s really pretty.”

“So get it! It’s only-”

Veronica twists her head, craning her neck to try and see the price tag.

“It’s only $50!”

Betty grimaces. It’s not too bad, but it’s not as cheap as she would like.

“V. I can’t. I hardly wear rings and-”

“Oh come one Betty. Imagine the look on Jughead’s face when he sees a ring on your finger. A silver crown ring on your finger. He’ll flip. And I mean in a good way. You two are practically engaged anyway.”

“Ron. No. It’s ok. It’s pretty but it’s not like I need it. And besides, I’m trying to save up remember? I don’t need to be impulse buying a ring I probably won’t even wear that much. And don’t say that around him. We’ve… We’ve talked about marriage. Maybe. In the future. The far future. I don’t want to freak him out or anything by buying myself a ring. ”

Veronica rolls her eyes but lets the matter drop. For now.

“By the way, V. Did you see anything you like?”

Veronica’s eyes light up.

“Ohmygosh. Betty. I found the cutest little flapper dress. It’s all crystal and sparkly and even if it’s Cherylred I can pull it off. I’m definitely getting it and we need to find you one too. We must have a Gatsby themed party before graduation. I demand it.”

Veronica moves back to the rack of dresses. Betty throws one last look at the ring in the glass case before following Veronica reluctantly.


That night, Veronica and Betty are joined by their boyfriends at Pop’s. Veronica regales them all with the details she already has planned for her Gatsby themed party. Having heard all of them already that afternoon, Betty excuses herself to the washroom.

Veronica seizes the opportunity.

“Jughead,” Veronica purrs coquettishly “I have some information I think you’d might like.”

Veronica balances her chin on her hands, a Cheshire smile in place. Archie turns a startled head to his girlfriend, alarmed at her stance and tone. Jughead stuffs an onion ring in his mouth, arching an eyebrow wordlessly.

“I think the one thing we can agree on is that we want Betty to be happy right?”

Jughead remains silent, rolling his eyes, refusing to answer what he must consider a dumb question.

“And we can all agree that Betty deserves the absolute best, right? She deserves to be spoiled like a princess and given anything her heart desires.”

“You going somewhere with this, Ronnie?”

The redhead hasn’t lost the look of confusion and he nudges Veronica slightly. Veronica pays him no mind, her whole attention on Jughead.

“Get to the point, Veronica.”

Jughead seems to be done with the games.

“I’m just saying that if Betty wanted something, within reason, you’d want to get it for her right?”

“…Yes.”

“If you don’t have $50 to spare I am willing to lend it to you. Just saying.”

Jughead rears back a little bit.

“$50? For what?”

Veronica glances at the restroom door. Their window of time is slowly disappearing.

“Betty found something super cute at one of the stores today but she refused to buy it and I think you should buy it for her because it would make her really happy. I am not telling you this because Betty’s playing some bullshit passive aggressive game about it and told me to tell you or whatever. It’s because I saw the way she looked at it and she rationalized herself out of buying it, but I think that even if she doesn’t need it she should have it.”

Jughead’s eyes narrow in calculation.

Betty walks out of the restrooms and settles herself back into Jughead’s side, stealing a fry from his plate.

“What did I miss?”

Jughead twists his head, pressing a soft kiss to Betty’s hair.

“Nothing much. Veronica was just telling us about some other things that you guys saw at the antique shops today.”

“Yeah. Like that ridiculously overpriced tea set. And the hideous ceramic dolls.”

Betty’s eyes light up and she bounces a little in her seat. She turns to Jughead

“Those dolls! Juggie, they’re gonna give me nightmares. There was this disjointed clown one I swear was haunted. It had the creepiest smile that was like, half worn away and these beady eyes that followed us around the store. I’m staying with you tonight and you have to hold me really tight ok? Also we are never watching It ever again.”

And just like that, Betty is distracted, going on a tangent about how much she doesn’t like Pennywise. Jughead catches Veronica’s eye for a split second and when they exchange nods, Veronica’s smile widens.


Two weeks later, Betty is sitting on the couch in Jughead’s trailer when he breezes in, throwing his jacket and keys on the opposite end.

“I have a surprise for you.”

Betty looks up from her laptop. She’s been going through apartment listings in New York that she and Jughead can possibly afford, making a binder filled with possibilities and the pros and cons of each.

“A surprise? What is it?”

Jughead drops himself on the couch next to her, a large box in his hands. Betty cocks an eyebrow at him skeptically.

“Why the gift? It’s not a birthday, an anniversary, or a major holiday. Not that I think we can only give each other gifts on those occasions but you know, society.”

Jughead snorts.

“So. Why did you decide to get me something?”

“Because I love you.”

The simple statement sends butterflies through her stomach, just as strong as the first time.

“I love you, Betty Cooper. So I bought you a gift. Am I not allowed to do that?”

His eyes are so earnest that Betty curses him. How is it possible that he can make her blush and fluster so easily? Is he supposed to be able to still have this effect on her? She’s irritated that he knows exactly what she’s thinking, judging by the smirk on his face.

To distract herself from kissing away his stupid smile, Betty opens the box and finds another box inside.

“You did not do this.”

Jughead’s smile gets wider when Betty tilts her head and gives him a baleful look. Sighing heavily, Betty pulls out the box and opens it up to find a smaller box. She opens up the third box to find a fourth box. And then a fifth. The sixth box is small and wooden and Betty has no idea what could be in it. She opens up the catch to find that it’s a ring box.

A ring box holding the ring from the antique store.

The little tines of the crown stare back at her and the stones sparkle in their setting . It’s been cleaned and polished very nicely since she saw it last. Betty swivels her head between the ring and Jughead, unable to form words.

“Veronica told me you liked it. And when I saw it, I couldn’t resist getting it for you. It might seem kind of egotistical to get you a ring with my symbol on it. At least what I sort of consider my symbol. But I’d really like for you to wear it, Betty.”

Betty nods rapidly, a smile on her face. Jughead scoots closer, putting an arm around her. His voice is low and serious and Betty wants to stay in this little bubble of happiness for forever.

“I… I’m not proposing. Not yet anyway. But. This is for you. And someday. Someday there’ll be another ring. If you want it, that is.”

“Oh. Juggie.”

Betty’s voice is breathy and amazed.

“Of course. Of course I want it. I love it. I love you so much.”

Betty throws herself into Jughead’s arms. She kisses, kisses, kisses him and he kisses her back just as fiercely. He scoots back just a touch and hauls Betty into his lap so she’s straddling him.

Betty links her hands behind his head while he anchors one hand at the small of her back. It’s a searing heat through her thin t-shirt. Jughead’s other hand roams up and down her spine, sending sparks skipping up and down her spine and raising goosebumps.

“Love you. Love you. Love you so much. Juggie I love you so much.”

Betty can’t stop telling Jughead how much she loves him in between kisses. Jughead pulls away just slightly and heaves a small breathy laugh against her lips.

“Betty. I love you.”

His blue eyes are warm and dark and Betty leans down to give him one more small peck. Jughead plucks the little ring box she’s been loosely holding out of her hand. He pulls the ring out and grasps her right hand gently. He takes the time to kiss the scars on her palm gently before turning it over and sliding the ring on her fourth finger.

Or… Trying to slide it on.

“It… doesn’t fit.”

Betty bursts out laughing. She buries her head into the crook of his neck as Jughead starts fighting with the ring and her finger. Jughead’s forehead creases and he growls a little at how it gets ¾ of the way down before getting stuck. After some struggles, he eventually gets it on but it’s a little too tight for Betty’s comfort.

“Betty. Stop laughing. This wasn’t supposed to happen.”

It’s Jughead’s turn to blush and Betty can’t help but kiss the pout away.

“Here, Jug.”

Betty moves the ring from her right hand to her left ring finger, where it fits snugly, but comfortably.

“I know you said you weren’t proposing yet, but I think that ring was meant for this finger.”

Jughead brings her hand back up to his mouth, placing more small kisses to her fingers.

“Why does it fit one hand and not the other?”

“I’m right handed. It happens. It’s ok. I like it better on this hand.”

“Everyone’s going to think it’s an engagement ring won’t they?”

Betty hums in agreement before responding.

“Probably. But whatever they say doesn’t matter. Whether or not we call it a promise ring or an engagement ring doesn’t matter. It’s just a piece of jewelry. What matters is us.”

“Does that mean you’re going to be the one to explain to your mother why you’re wearing it on that finger?

Betty laughs and nods in agreement. She lifts her leg and folds it underneath her so that she’s sitting in Jughead’s lap instead of straddling him. Jughead wraps both arms around her and cuddles close, settling his head in the tuck of her neck and shoulder. Betty holds her hand up so that it catches the low light shining in the trailer. Jughead presses a kiss to the curve of her neck.

“It’s so pretty.” Betty murmurs.

“Not as pretty as you.”

Betty elbows him gently.

“Cheeseball. Who knew, when we first started dating that you would be such a sap?”

“Only for you.”

Betty giggles and elbows him gently again. He tickles her in retaliation and she squeals before he swoops in to steal another kiss. They spend long minutes like that before Betty breaks away again to admire the ring. She uses the index finger of her right hand to softly stroke the little dips and grooves in the ring.

“Thank you, Jughead.”

“Well if I get thanked like that, I should get you jewelry more often.”

Missed Connection

This month I met a guy on my work travels that made me think about fame and loneliness. As a result I decided to return to the world of the Tres Spades and write this short story. 

There’s no real romance or sex, but I hope you’ll enjoy.


It’s not like I ever wanted to be a maid, but my mom got sick and additional money was more helpful than a pending college degree.

When I first made the decision to drop out of college, I never could have imagined that I’d still be working at this hotel five years later, yet here I was at another one of the hotel’s stuffy parties - serving miniature versions of hot dogs and hamburgers to wealthy guests who made more eye contact with the food on my tray than the person holding it.

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mnemehoshiko  asked:

in a universe where like NO ONE DIED IN ROGUE ONE, 1) WHO REALIZED THEY WERE EMOTIONALLY COMPROMISED FIRST JYN, CASSIAN, OR OTHER? 2) WHO LOCKED THEM IN THE SUPPLY CLOSET TO GET OVER THE #TENSION AND 3) IF THIS WAS AN ACADEMIA AU, WHO WOULD BE WHICH FIELD FOR THE ROGUE ONE CREW?....i don't know why I'm abusing caps again

1) Absolutely Cassian. By the three-quarter mark of the movie he’s already giving her gifts (“I got you a strike force, hope you like it”) and suggesting couple activities (“hey, wanna infiltrate a high-security Imperial facility together?”)

2) Unknown because it was done with extreme stealth and no-one will admit to it; who’d want to face Jyn & Cassian’s wrath?

According to Rebel gossip, the leading contenders are Chirrut (who’s offended by the suggestion that he’d resort to such cheap tricks), Leia (in order to divert attention from whatever this thing she has going with Solo is); and Solo (for kicks).

Surprise twist, it was K-2SO. Given the odds that the two of them were eventually going to engage in sexual activity, he grew tired of their irritating recalcitrance. He still gives a running commentary on their odds of breaking up (also high, according to him).

3) Mneme, WHAT HAVE YOU DOOOOOONE?!? /o\ You know I can’t resist an academic AU…

Cassian:

  • hmm, I see 2 possibilities…
    • Political Science, specializing in popular revolutions (of course) and consent theory/civil justice. Gives his students extra credit for participating in political demonstrations.
    • Computer Science, encryption and AI theory. Rumours abound that he secretly consults with the NSA and/or is a white hat hacker (he was totally the one behind [latest huge whistleblowing leak])

Jyn:

  • 20C Military History
  • tries to be apolitical, does not succeed
  • all her student evaluations are either zero stars or five, no middle ground
  • legendary for making flag-waving wannabe Pattons storm out of her class

Bodhi:

  • Languages/Linguistics
  • incredibly busy, teaches 3 languages of the Indian sub-continent plus an abstruse course in cognitive linguistics
  • his language classes are full of thirsty undergrads who flock to his office hours, asking him to correct their Punjabi pronunciation
  • (yes, this is a totally shallow choice because Riz Ahmed has a lovely voice & I just want to listen to him talk in any language/accent whatsoever)

Chirrut:

  • Head of the Office of Student Life, or whatever its equivalent at this institution is called
  • has talked hundreds of overstressed students down off metaphorical (and probably literal) ledges
  • loves fighting with the Financial Aid office over denied applications; they hide under their desks when they see him coming

Baze:

  • a glass-blowing instructor in the Fine Arts department
  • hates academia & complains about it constantly
  • they keep trying to hire him as a full professor and he refuses because then he’d have to teach art history/theory as well
  • but if you get 3 pints in him he will go off on an hour-long rant about Dale Chihuly

Kay:

  • Statistics, of course
  • all those humanities students forced to take Intro to Stats so they can understand the concept of margin of error are the bane of his existence
Remember Me

Summary: You knew Sam when you were eighteen years old, and now you run into him again.

Word Count: 2300ish

Warning: Smut, angst

A/N: Not gonna lie. Taylor Swift’s Wildest Dreams came on in my car and this is what happened. Oops. Hope you enjoy!


“Sam? Sam Winchester?”

The man turns around, lips breaking into a nervous smile as his eyes focus on you instead of the boxes lining the shelves of the cereal aisle. “Y/N? What are you…I mean, hi.”

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curse words;

member- jungkook

genre- fluff, au (warning- a bit more cussing than usual)

words- 1,455

summary- “the first words you’ll ever say to your soulmate is tattooed on the inside of your left ring finger” soulmate!au

a/n- hello cuties! i wasn’t planning on posting another soulmate!au scenario, but a lovely follower (it wont let me tag their name for some reason, but it is @ smelllikeleatherandbooks ) gave me this idea when they commented on my yoongi scenario, thanks to you, i will be doing a soulmate series! a different au for each member :’) everybody, PLEASE give me some feedback on this scenario (and the whole idea). im quite nervous about it! 

Yoongi I

Originally posted by baebsaes

As you grow up, you’re taught which words are “appropriate” to use, like ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. On the other hand, also learn which ones you definitely shouldn’t say during a church service, which range from ‘ass’ to the f word.

Well, things were a bit different for you.

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omgkatsudonplease  asked:

prompt: "my brain is a carefully curated pinterest board"

set in the sherlock au verse!!! :D (unofficially)

“I just don’t understand how you remember so many inane things when you can’t even remember which order the months go in,” Yuuri complained, though his eyes were soft and fond as he shot an exasperated glance at Victor over the rim of his coffee cup.

Victor leaned back in his seat, the ambient noise of Charlotte’s Corner swirling around them. Victor paid no attention to it; Yuuri was much more interesting. He offered an indulgent smile. They’d been living with each other for a few months now, the distance between them growing smaller and smaller as they got to know each other better.

Still, they each had their mysteries—and the mysteries they shared were the most interesting of all.

“My mind is a carefully curated Pinterest board, Yuuri,” Victor said with a dainty, haughty sniff.

Yuuri snorted into his triple espresso. “Did you sneak onto Yuuko’s desktop again?”

Victor pouted into his travel mug of Earl Gray. “No.” He didn’t like to think that these few moments he could steal with Yuuri before his classes and clinic shifts would be taken up by allusions that he was anything less than impressive.

…but really, he just wanted to impress Yuuri. He always wanted to impress Yuuri.

Yuuri arched a brow. The stark white collar of his med coat was peeking out from under his puffy winter jacket. “No? Really? Would you perjure yourself if we were in court right now?”

“…I didn’t sneak anywhere. Yuuko gave me permission to use her desktop,” Victor admitted, but Yuuri’s bark of laughter was worth the gloom of confessing to anything less than extraordinary. “It’s an interesting website, Yuuri. And an adequate analogy! You know how my brain works.”

“Enough to know you won’t remember Pinterest next week now that you’ve made your reference. How long have you been sitting on that line?” Yuuri’s grin was bright; his eyes shone behind his glasses, and it was almost worth the implication that Victor lived his life from cheap trick to cheap trick, from witty quip to another one-liner… no matter how true that may be.

Victor scuffed his feet under the café table. The toe of his oxford shoe caught Yuuri’s winter boot. “You wound me, Yuuri. Pretty soon I’ll be forced to think you don’t hold me in high regard at all.”

Yuuri shook his head, a fond little gesture that spoke familiarity and affection more than agreement to Victor’s complaint. “There’s no one I think more highly of. You know that.”

Victor blinked. He stared. His lips parted and he exhaled, even as the rapt attention drew a pink stain to Yuuri’s cheeks. “Really?”

“Come on. I can make fun of you and still admit you’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met, can’t I?”

Yuuri’s eyes were downcast now; he worried his lip between his teeth. And then Victor felt Yuuri’s foot under the table—a flicker of warmth, even at the shiver of cold as the icy boot hooked around the back of his ankle.

Victor let out a long, low, silent breath. He smiled against the plastic lid of his cup. “Sometimes you forget to mention that second part.”

“It’s true.” Yuuri drummed his fingers against his to-go cup, then turned a wry smirk back on Victor. “Even if I don’t say it often.”

Contentment. Victor’s eyes lingered on Yuuri—the beautiful shapes of him, a miracle of physics and biology all wrapped up in that truly terrible winter coat. “I’ll remember that,” Victor vowed.

Yuuri tilted his head and crossed his arms over his chest, and his voice was private and only for Victor when he replied, “Yes, I’m sure you will.”

Things I learnt in first year, before second year starts up

Last year was my first year studying BA English at Leicester. It was great and stressful and exciting and I’ll admit for all my research I wasn’t quite prepared. So in the hopes of helping someone out, here are things I learnt last year and my advice for anyone about to start uni 


-  no one cares what you’re wearing so it’s totally okay to wear trackies - but if you’re having a bad day dress nicely, it’ll make you feel better or at least slightly more put together

- always carry a phone charger

- bookstores are over-priced, even uni ones, Waterstones marketplace and amazon new + used are usually as cheap as you’ll get 

- always take notes in lectures, don’t just listen and rely on recordings later – use the recordings to expand on your original notes later on

- always go to class – again, don’t rely on recordings

- try everything, take every opportunity – even if nothing comes out of it, you’ll probably have some fun… and usually get some free food

- wait until you get your official reading lists before you buy your books - advertised/example ones can often be out of date and or wrong

- don’t worry if you don’t make amazingly close friends in the first few weeks, true friendship takes time

- don’t be afraid to contact an RA/campus security if people are being rowdy/antisocial, you’ll remain anonymous and the noise will stop preeeetty soon

- create a schedule at the beginning of the year and stick to it, this will help you in the long run when exam time comes around

- make your bed and pick up your clothes in the morning, it’s nicer to come home to a tidy room after a long day

- join a society, and actually take part – once freshers has quietened down things can become quite stressful while you get used to the workload, having somewhere to go and make friends and have some fun can be a good way to de-stress


hopefully this helps at least one of you out, good luck with the coming school year!! remember I track the tag ‘studybum’, let me know if this helps you out

Why do I wear makeup?

So, I worked with little kids for many years, and they often asked me variations on ‘Why are your lips different colors on different days?’ ‘Why do you put stuff on your eyes?’ I always told them the same thing: “I like to put colors on my face for fun, to go with my clothes!”

Other people my age sometimes ask, “Why do you wear so much makeup?” I tell them, “It just makes me feel more awake when I look more awake, and besides, I did theatre for so many years that I just got used to seeing myself with makeup on.”

A few weeks ago, a friend said something to me along the lines of, “I know you enjoy using makeup and that’s a form of self-expression for you.” It was such a positive way to say it that it startled me, and weirdly, made me feel like I didn’t need to defend why I like to use makeup. Instead, for the first time, I told the truth.

“Actually,” I said, “I sort of feel like makeup is my apology to society for not being conventionally attractive. Like, ‘look guys, I’m trying.’” I’d never actually admitted it before, but for me, I don’t think of makeup as something I do for fun or to express myself, it’s a way to try to make myself look like I’m at least putting in an effort to fit the standards of femininity. It doesn’t bring me joy, but it makes me feel more secure, like I have a small amount of control over the way I look.

As someone who has a LOT of physical flaws and a weird body type, I sometimes secretly feel like I have to ‘perform’ femininity in a more elaborate and over-the-top way than someone who is more naturally attractive. I’m not fishing for compliments or asking to be reassured otherwise, I just feel this way deep down despite knowing it’s not rational– like I don’t really “count” as a woman because that word, at least to me, implies a certain degree of ‘prettiness.’ When some girls wear an oversized t-shirt and no makeup, they look cute and natural. I look like a mugshot on the news of someone who ran over her boyfriend with a ride-on lawnmower while high on bath salts. 

It is kind of freeing to admit that I actually do use makeup to hide my insecurities instead of pretending it’s a purely artistic choice. (Also, I’m not especially great at makeup. And I use really cheap brands. So if it was an artistic hobby, it would be a pretty sad one.) That said, I do love to do special effects- zombie makeup, animal characters, things like that.

So I guess my question is, for other people who like to use makeup, am I the only one out there who feels this way? Is there a distinction for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts.