i actually really like this not gonna lie

anonymous asked:

Heyy it's the anon who asked you to tell us about the lucky guy....Not gonna lie the way you described him makes him sound like a dead ringer for Crylo Ren. Would you say that's the case?

He’s not really anything like Kylo hahahha, he’s really jokey and fun, and he always tends to say what he’s thinking. Like these are actual conversations I had with him:

(At MacDonald’s)
Me: Do you want me to get you anything?
Him: No, it’s okay
Me: Are you sure?
Him: Yeah, don’t get me anything
Him: ….
Him: Okay, a cheeseburger and two hamburgers, please

(driving past a sex toy shop)
Me: have you ever been in one of those?
Him: No, what’s it like?
Me: it’s run by old ladies
Him: oh, cool. I bought a sex toy online once
Me: yeah?
Him: yeah, it’s a fleshlight. I’ll show you next time you come over

Him: so what music do you listen to?
Me: *tells him what music I listen to*
Him: omg you’re awesome, did you hear that (his friend)? She listens to _____, omg you’re awesome. *pokes my cheeks* you’re an alt girl, aren’t you? you’re so cool. 

Him: you’re literally, like, the hottest girl I’ve seen this year

Me: *tells him anything about myself*
Him: omg did we just fall in love? I love you. Let’s get married

He’s pretty much the most entertaining person I’ve ever met, and like the circumstances under which we met were so … fateful? Like a lot of specific choices I made led me to the same club, at the same bar, right behind him so that his friend could mistake me for someone he knew and introduce us. I’m so fucking into him it’s crazy. send help

regional differences

“oh hey,” she said, “it’s a really touristy area, but since you’re gonna be passing through anyway, you might as well stop by pier 29, see the dragons. also, there’s a—”

“hold on,” i said. “i knew your city had mountains, but. dragons? uh, actual living dragons?”

“dude, it’s not a big deal. they’re there all the time. of course they’re majestic and everything, but they’re loud and cranky and mostly they lie around eating garbage. now and then the city council will talk about trying to make them roost somewhere else, but—”

“dragons,” i repeated. i knew it was making me sound like a rube, but it was a lot to take in. “you live in a city that has dragons.”

“no, it’s cool, we used to go see them when i was a little kid. it’s worth doing. but that whole area is mostly dragon-themed gift shops, and the commercialization is kind of a bummer. also, sometimes a dragon will melt somebody’s car and it’s a whole problem.”

"fairytale-style, giant scaly fire-breathing dragons.”

“honestly, i forget other cities don’t have them?” she said. "there’s a few other sites on the west coast where they gather. portland calls them wyverns, but that’s a portland thing.”

"chicago’s got, like, bunnies and songbirds,” i told her, “but otherwise it’s just your typical vermin. pigeons, rats, sphinxes—”

“sphinxes? what the hell.

“oh, yeah, they nest in the el tunnels. sometimes a fucking sphinx will flap down out of nowhere, bring the whole train to a halt until the front car answers a riddle.”

“that sounds exciting,” she said.

“it’s the worst. your train winds up being twenty minutes late, and you just have to hang out hoping somebody up there read their mythology. there’s supposed to be a program where the conductors get trained in riddling, but i don’t know. rahm emmanuel keeps saying it’s not a budget priority.”

“huh,” she said. “guess the grass is always greener and all that. but on some level, it’s nice to remember that even with all these big box stores, the country still has some variety left in it.”

“yeah, did you know that in rhode island they call water fountains ‘bubblers’?” i said.

“whoa, seriously?”

“i read it somewhere. crazy, right?”

“crazy.”

reasons why the princess diaries 2 is actually the best movie ever made

ok so i know that when we were all young fanchildren we all watched this movie and sighed dreamily. but i am here to tell u that this movie is even better than u remember

1. the main conflict in the movie is the arranged marriage. i’m gonna stop right here, because princesses in arranged marriages are a classic fanfiction trope that we are all trash for. don’t lie to yourself. but it gets BETTER. not only is there an arranged marriage… the guy she’s arranged to marry is actually a really chill dude. u like this dude. u know they would be good friends and partners. he would make a good king. but sHE DOESNT LOVE HIM!!! she doesn’t love him. and it would be so easy for the narrative to say ~oh look at this selfish girl she has a handsome titled good man ready to marry her she’s so SELFISH for wanting passion and true love, so naive~ (see fuckboys: i’m so nice and handsome why doesn’t she love me she’s horrible) instead the narrative presents her not marrying him as a perfectly valid choice and one the viewer sides with her on. the narrative supports her choice and makes it clear it was the right decision. ADDITIONALLY, the solution presented to fix the arranged marriage problem is to DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY. like???? don’t fuck with me this movie is perfect

2. literally the other main conflict is the love interest. he’s essentially a conman trying to convince mia to fall passionately in love with him so he can steal the throne. but along the way… he falls in love with her. THIS IS LITERALLY THE PLOT OF THREE THOUSAND FANFICTIONS PEOPLE

3. speaking of fanfiction…this movie is one. like, i’m not even joking. the first princess diaries movie essentially compiled the first 3 books into a movie, but the sequel wasn’t based on the books at all. disney just pulled something out of their asses and was like “this will make the fangirls happy”

4. at the beginning of the movie mia graduates from princeton’s woodrow wilson school of international affairs… literally one of the best international studies programs on the planet.. then she’s flown to a castle…where she’s a princess..and has hot men falling all over her…and wears ballgowns…like…mia is such a mary sue but somehow the movie manages to avoid making her one AT ALL

5. also holy shit??! mia doesn’t just stand around looking pretty as a princess.. she’s clearly really smart and genuinely cares about the people of genovia and does her best to serve them well even to it’s hard work… like damn mia is fucking committed to being a good queen she’s not just a princess because castles make good backdrops for romances

6. the queen/joe YAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS u fucking know u shipped that shit

7. THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS ABOUT FUCKING THE PATRIARCHY. MIA IS PORTRAYED AS KIND AND SENSITIVE BUT THAT ADDS TO HER APPEAL AS A RULER NOT DETRACTS FROM IT. AT THE END OF THE MOVIE SHE’S LIKE “fuck these rules written by old white men, i’m gonna make my own less sexist rules” AND THEN SHE FUCKING DOES?!? SHE FUCKING CALLS OUT THE SEXISM OF THE LAWS AND THEN CHANGES THEM. HELLO WOMEN IN PARLIAMENT! GOODBYE BOYS CLUBS! A WOMAN IS FULLY CAPABLE OF RULING ON HER OWN WITHOUT A MAN AND SHE FUCKING DRILLS THAT INTO THEIR GODDAMN HEADS

8. chris pine. what a hot piece of ass amiright

9. the number of times something fucking bizarre happens to mia and she theoretically looks into the camera like she’s on the office is comedic gold honestly. the maids?? flirting with her arranged husband?? climbing out a window?? the fAKE LEG!? mia is just trying to live her life but the universe keeps fucking it up. i feel u mia. 

in sum i have n o idea how the fuck this movie got made but goddamn is it not god’s gift to man

Fill-a-Page February day 03!

Not gonna lie, today was a struggle. Work has been kicking my arse this week and I’m shattered *lays down* but topless Iwa makes up for it. Topless Iwa makes up for so many things. I’m just gonna…not look at anything else…

hamilton characters as actual things said in my class

alexander: i’m not gonna do this… yes i am.

laurens: i slammed my head on my keyboard and hit enter and this came up

lafayette: not once, have i!

hercules: what about the kids out there who didn’t do their homework?

eliza: luckily mr. washington saved the day, god love his little soul.

angelica: wakey wakey eggs and math

peggy: i’m gonna go hang myself in the bathtub

washington: this is madness

thomas: i dont think its really your birthday you lie like a rug

madison: i almost said addition, james you dumb fool.

burr: *mumbling to self* tep tep tep tep tep tep

philip: i’m acute-y *dab*

maria: at school i don’t really care but when i go out on the town i get all dressed up

inspired by @dankdotham

Electric Touch [m]

Smut // Dom!baek, spanking, choking, daddy!kink // rewrite 

“I’ll take your jacket,” Baekhyun says the moment you too step into his apartment.

“Thanks,” You unravel your scarf then slip out of your leather jacket, “I still can’t believe we’re doing this.”

“If you’re not comfortable you can back out anytime,” He takes your jacket and drapes it on top of his coat hanger, “You don’t have to do this.”

Keep reading

{The time Jeongyeon broke her leg conveniently when Twice got a special stage}

{2 June 2016}

Jeongyeon: [Finds out TWICE are performing i’m gonna be a star on m countdown]

Jeongyeon: [Breaks leg purposely] CHAEYOUNG WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU

Chaeyoung: What do you want Jeongyeon?

Jeongyeon: You’re doing my lines next week on M Countdown.

Chaeyoung: JEONGYEON NO

Jeongyeon: [Gives death stare] JIHYOOOOOOOO

Chaeyoung: SHIT

Chaeyoung: [Runs away silently singing “all the oppadeuls and unnies”]

Jihyo: [Walking to Jeongyeon] what are you doing chaeyoung?

Chaeyoung: IM PRACTICING GO AWAY [Runs faster]

Jeongyeon: [Puts legs up] I never liked that song. FOOD PLEASE BITCH

You Really Got a Hold On Me

Originally posted by hardyness

Request: “ Can you do one where the reader is kylo’s girlfriend or wife or something is a teacher to the children on base but she has KYLIE wrapped around her finger and he does anything she says and stuff like that. Just fluff I guess”

Summary: Kylo, who is put into an arranged marriage by his consent to the princess of an overthrown planet, finds himself slowly having a change of heart. Though he is still the brooding and fear striking Commander of the First Order, he finds that over a span of time he has somehow grown a soft spot.

A/N: Ok, not gonna lie, fluff is actually really hard for me to write haha, it’s just not entirely my thing. That being said, in terms of Kylo Ren the true character, this is pretty floofy for him. It’s also kinda inspired by some floof @primma-dona sent me when I was feeling down, so thanks for that! Hope you enjoy!


With forceful and heavy thuds echoing through the air, Kylo marched his way through the various halls of the brand new First Order base. His broad shoulders were held stiff and high as they faintly shifted with every step he took, his fists clenched at his sides. The entirety of his appearance exuded his growing impatience with this day as well as his unquestioned physical strength. Though most days his robes concealed his physique, his brooding posture and walk did him justice.

Despite their growing recovery from the destruction of Starkiller, the First Order still had days as scrambled as this, still had to deal with the Resistance just as they had before. No matter how much territory they gained or alliances they formed, the Resistance never seemed to diminish in the slightest. 

The stress was high on this particular afternoon, given the renewed efforts of the Resistance to tamper with the Order’s newest location. Given just how advanced the base was in terms of innovation, it was more than a saught after target. Much like today, Kylo was pulled from his preferred tasks in order to deal with yet another prisoner, hoping something would be divulged to his advantage. 

Stopping before one of the many cell blast doors, Kylo huffed out a deep breath as he turned to the two troopers standing guard. Both troopers bow their heads faintly as they keep their hands on their blasters.

“Sir.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

More gay divorcee au pls bc I wanna see how it goes when Tony meets his Army neighbors (also I want someone, preferably Pepper/Tony, punching Ty)

Tony was trying very hard not to cry.

Last night he’d gotten a call from Ty—from Stone. He’d been too scared to pick it up, had let it go to voicemail. When he’d finally gotten the courage to listen to the message, it had been nothing but vitriol, telling him that he was nothing, that he’d regret leaving, he’d never make it alone and he’d ruin Peter just like Howard had ruined him. Tony had saved the message with shaking fingers and sent a text to Pepper about it to tell his lawyer for the restraining order, because she—she was being an amazing friend and handling that for him while his world fell down around his ears.

With the voicemail, he hadn’t been able to sleep well. He’d tossed and turned with nightmares of Stone getting custody of Peter, of Tony only being allowed to see him sparingly, of seeing bruises on Peter’s little body and Peter’s accusing eyes, as if to say ‘you could have prevented this.’ And then those nightmares were interspersed with memories of the gaslighting Stone had had made him suffer throughout their entire relationship, telling Tony he was being silly or overreacting and laughing about it, and memories of the times Stone had hit him and then apologized and made Tony feel like it was his fault, like he’d been asking for it.

Then Peter had woken up with an earache and Tony had had to give him medicine and Peter hated taking medicine. Peter would spit out pills if they were given to him, and any attempt at giving him liquid medicine ended up with more of the dose on Peter’s clothes than in his mouth. Tony had finally had to cave and mix it in with some chocolate milk, and Peter had eyed him suspiciously the entire time he drank it because he knew he wasn’t supposed to have chocolate milk except for as dessert.

Once he’d set Peter down to play in his playpen, Tony had realized that he hadn’t done any yard work the past two weeks and stressed about that until he could put Peter down for his nap. He didn’t like to leave Peter alone but he knew he’d never be able to get anything done if he had to watch Peter outside, that dread that someone was watching them and reporting back to Stone always leaving him short of breath and with a cold sweat.

And now the fucking lawnmower wouldn’t work and Tony should have been able to fix it but he just couldn’t figure out what was wrong and Peter would surely wake from his nap soon—Tony took a shuddering breath and lifted his arm to press the back of his wrist against one eye, fingers covered with oil and muck. He would not cry. It was just a fucking lawnmower. It was just fucking yard work. He had bigger problems, like his divorce and getting custody of Peter and designing the next big thing for green energy.

“…Why me,” Tony whispered to himself, deciding that he could feel sorry for himself just for a minute.

“Hey!” someone called, and Tony leapt to his feet, skittering backward. He took a moment to wish he had his handgun to protect himself with and nearly crumpled with despair at the thought, because he hadn’t—he hadn’t used to think of protecting himself first thing, especially not with deadly force.

The blond guy from across the street stared at him, wide-eyed. “Oh my God, I’m so—I’m so sorry, I thought you heard me coming up.”

“Oh.” Tony hunched his shoulders, embarrassed, wanting to scuttle back inside and hide. “No, I—I didn’t.”

“I can see that,” Blond Guy said, still looking very apologetic. “I just noticed you’d been out here a long time and—Oh, is this Colonel Rhodes’s lawnmower? It hasn’t worked in months.”

“O-oh?” Tony asked hopefully, because he’d worried he’d just—been too stupid to figure it out. Logically he’d known better, but after years of Ty telling him he was—well.

“Yeah, he’s been borrowing ours,” Blond Guy replied, shrugging.

Tony could probably fix it, if he had the time to worry about it instead of worrying about when Peter would wake up and if Ty had sent anyone to keep an eye on them. Hell, if he’d known about it before Rhodey left, he would have been able to fix it while Rhodey kept an eye on Peter. Tony sagged a little, feeling defeated. He didn’t have the mental stamina to deal with this now.

Blond Guy frowned at him for a long moment before thrusting his hand out. “I’m Steve, by the way. Steve Rogers.”

“Tony.” Tony held his hand out, saw the oil still smeared on it, and shame-facedly began to draw it back. “Oh, uh, sorry—”

Steve grabbed his hand anyway to shake it. “’s fine. I’ve had worse on my hands. It’s not like I wow that was a bad idea this is so much oil.”

“Yeah,” Tony said, reluctantly amused.

“My friends tell me I’m uselessly impulsive,” Steve offered. “Listen, I usually mow Colonel Rhodes’s lawn for him while he’s gone anyway. I’ll just keep doing that, okay?”

“Oh, um, okay,” Tony said, torn between the desire to insist he could do it himself and the relief that he didn’t have to worry about this particular responsibility. “I, um—Rhodey left me some money, I can pay you—”

“Nah,” Steve said immediately. “No, it’s fine. I was gonna do it anyway. Colonel Rhodes lets me sketch his hydrangeas sometimes so I figure it’s only fair.”

Tony stared at him for a moment. “Is. Is that a euphemism?”

“What,” Steve said blankly, and then turned as red as a blotchy tomato. “Oh my God, no! I mean, no. I’m an artist.”

“Oh,” Tony said, because he never would have guessed. Steve looked more like someone who punched Nazis in the face and then bench-pressed a wheelbarrow full of kittens with each arm when he was finished than a guy who liked to draw flowers. Tony found that… rather charming, actually. “I see. That’s nice.”

“Yup, I love working on florals,” Steve agreed proudly. “My boyfriend has some of my handiwork on his body, too!”

Oh, a boyfriend. Steve looked so happy. Tony felt a jealous pang, sick and bitter, at the bottom of his stomach. Tony wished he could be happy like that. Looking back, he’d never been as proud to say ‘my boyfriend’ or ‘my husband’ when he talked about Ty as Steve did talking about his boyfriend right now. Maybe he’d known, even then, that Stone wasn’t good to him. Maybe Howard had damaged him more than he’d thought.

“I—” Tony cleared his throat. “I have to go check on Peter. Maybe—maybe you’d like to do art together sometime?”

Tony wanted to throw up as soon as he’d suggested it. Steve was—Steve was probably busy. And he was an actual artist, not someone who finger-painted and drew stick figures. Steve was a young handsome guy with a boyfriend. Why would he want to spend time with a soon-to-be-divorcee and a toddler when he probably had an equally handsome boyfriend and an apparently lucrative art business? God, Tony didn’t even want to be friends with himself right now.

“Sure,” Steve said brightly. “I love doing art with kids. They’re so creative.”

Tony couldn’t help a smile. That was so nice. “Yeah, Petey-Bird’s the next da Vinci.”

Steve raised his eyebrows, impressed. “Really? Wow. Peter must be really smart.”

“Y-yes?” Tony fought the urge to shrink again. He thought Peter was smart, but he was his dad, it was probably—he was very biased.

Steve beamed at him. “I’d like to meet him sometime. Just let me know when a good time is and I’ll see what I can do!”

“Okay,” Tony agreed cautiously. “…Okay, yeah. Not—not this week, but, um, maybe next-?”

“Sure! Just go ahead and give us a knock when you decide on a time, okay? Bucky might answer and he’s got a bit of a resting bitch face but he’s actually—well, no, I’m not gonna lie, he’ll probably be a little gruff when he answers the door. He’s got a gooey caramel center in there somewhere.”

Tony did not say ‘that’s horrifying’ but only because he was literally too horrified to do so. “Okay.”

“Great!” Steve enthused. “I’ll talk to you later, then!”

Tony smiled awkwardly, nodding, before putting the lawnmower back together as best he could and shoving it back in the garage. He promised it that when this was all over and his life wasn’t in shambles anymore, he would spend some time fixing it.

Tony was giving Peter some peanut butter crackers when he heard the roar of a lawnmower. He smiled. “Steve’s mowing our lawn, Pumpkin Eater.”

“D’eve!” Peter garbled around the crackers, throwing his arms up cheerfully.

“Yup, Steve,” Tony repeated, walking over to the window so Peter could see him and put a name to a face.

He choked when he saw that Steve had foregone a shirt in the heat. Jesus Christ that was a lot of muscles.


Bucky sighed and flopped onto the couch face-first.

“Hi,” Steve said, looking up from his sketchbook. “Long day?”

“Fuck off.”

Steve frowned and set his sketchbook aside to walk over to him, beginning to rub his back. “What’s wrong?”

“Fucking Rumlow tried to hire me to keep an eye on his asshole client’s husband.”

“You don’t work with Rumlow anymore,” Steve pointed out calmly, still heated about how Rumlow’s checks for Bucky’s prior work kept conveniently getting lost in the mail. “Tell me you turned him down.”

Bucky jerked his head up. “I said he tried, not that he got me to do it.”

“Good,” Steve began, then frowned. “Oh.”

That meant he didn’t have a job then. Rumlow was doing his level best to make sure no one else hired Bucky as a private investigator. Bucky was the best at what he did but when he realized that Rumlow was using his information to hurt other people, he’d stopped working for him. Rumlow hadn’t taken that particularly well. Steve’s comic was selling pretty steadily but without Bucky’s paychecks their monthly budget was getting kind of tight. Bucky would probably be pissed that Steve had turned down Tony’s offer of money for the lawn—

“No, I got a job,” Bucky grumbled. “It’s from Natasha though. She’s the only one that hasn’t hopped on the ‘Barnes is a menace and a liar’ train.”

“Well,” Steve began, then stopped awkwardly. Sometimes Natasha and Bucky were the best of friends and sometimes they were at each others’ throats. He didn’t really understand most days, and he didn’t know what their relationship was right now. “Well,” he said again. “That’s something, right?”

“Protection detail,” Bucky whined. “I’m supposed to keep anyone her client’s husband might hire away from her client’s house.”

“Oh,” Steve said. Bucky hated protection details. He had been to jail for protection details and had sometimes failed to be bailed out by his clients. “Oh, well—you can, you can still say no—”

“No, I took it,” Bucky sighed, sitting up. “I need to do something. And Natasha said it’s for a personal friend of hers. If she thinks one of her friends needs protecting, then…” He tilted his head a little. “Well, she’s paying me good money for it. And she said she’ll owe me one for it on top of that.”

“Oh wow,” Steve said, because Natasha owing them one? That would be good for a rainy day, honestly. “Okay. Who are you protecting? How long is the detail? Will you be gone long?”

“Honestly after the shit day I had I was kinda avoiding looking at it,” Bucky admitted.

Steve got up to grab his satchel and pulled the thick case file from it. “Gotta love how thorough she is.”

“I guess. Can you read it to me, hon’? I’d really like to just lie here a little while longer,” Bucky sighed, flopping back onto the couch.

Steve nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

“You’re the best, babe,” he murmured, smiling a little. He waited a few minutes for Steve to start reading to him, then frowned when he didn’t, opening his eyes to look at him. “Steve? Doll? You okay?”

Steve stared at the file a little longer before dragging his eyes up to him, horrified. “This—this is Tony. The neighbor that Colonel Rhodes wanted us to keep an eye on? Because his husband’s a huge dick and might go after him because of his divorce?”

“Gimme!” Bucky barked, holding his hand out for the file, and didn’t bitch when Steve tucked his chin on his shoulder so he could read it too.

Tony Stark owned an electronics company that was branching out into green energy, a very lucrative business. He also had various stocks and bonds left to him by his parents’ estate, and an adorable two-year-old named Peter of whom they’d just finalized their adoption. Tiberius Stone had signed a prenup, and when Tony had served him with divorce papers, had decided to do his level best to drag it out and drain every inch of money he could from Tony, finding a judge either sympathetic enough or easily bribed enough to entertain it.

Natasha had been brought in by Pepper Potts, Tony’s assistant-slash-business-partner-slash-best-friend, the moment she caught wind of it. That was good, because Natasha already hated Rumlow, Stone’s lawyer, and loved going at it in the courts with him. Bucky felt his heart sink in his chest a little, because for all intents and purposes, the only thing Tony had ever done wrong was marry the wrong person, but Rumlow was going to hire someone to get information to make Tony look unfit and awful—Bucky knew that from experience.

“I’ll just hafta stay on my toes, ‘s all,” Bucky decided firmly.

Tony had enough cards stacked against him, but if Natasha thought he was worth protecting? If Colonel Rhodes thought he was worth protecting? He’d do it. Natasha was morally gray sometimes but she was freakishly protective of her friends, and Colonel Rhodes was a good man—if he thought Tony was worth protecting, Bucky believed him.

Besides, Steve had already told him how much Tony obviously loved his son. Bucky had always been pretty weak when it came to parents that loved their children anyway.

White-haired!Midori for your viewing pleasure ~

Hate To Love You || Part 2

Prompt: The readers hatred for Brett might be reconsidered

Warnings: Get the tissues ready, Angst, sad, plot twist at the end. 

Word Count: 2,904

Pairing: Brett Talbot x Werewolf! Reader

A/N: You all know how this ends… : ( Feedback is always welcomed. Put on some sad music to set the mood : (

Part 1

~Masterlist~


You were driving off in the direction of the Scott’s house because none of the boys seemed to want to pick up. It was killing you not knowing if Brett was okay or still alive. Everything had started clouding up in your mind that you almost didn’t notice a figure standing in the middle of the road. You barely hit the brakes in time to not hit the person. 

You ran a hand through your hair for not driving with caution. Something that you always did. You finally looked up and saw Lori with a worried expression and a stick in her hand. It smelled of blood, but not just any blood, it was Brett’s. You swiftly got out of the car.

“Lori what the hell?!” You exclaimed.

“You have Brett’s car? Where’s Brett?!” She squinted her eyes to try to see into the car for anybody else.

“Brett told me to run,” Your heart skipped a beat from the memory just previously, “Before he ran into the woods.” You explained to her. 

“Then you know he’s hurt,” She rose the stick in her hand.

“Yea…” You bowed your head down.

“We have to look for him, he could die if we don’t get to him!” She said.

“Well we’re wasting time and gas, so get in!” You motioned to the door with with thumb.

You arrived at Scott’s, parking up front getting out of the car. The two of you were heading towards the front door before hearing an engine go off. You both glanced at each other and started jogging up to the driveway. Scott was slightly reversing until he hit the brakes noticing Lori standing behind the jeep. He got out of the jeep. 

“I found this. It’s Brett’s, and he’s missing, and I heard gun shots,” Lori rambled quickly.

“How do you know this is his blood?” Scott questioned.

“Because he’s my brother, it’s mine too,” Lori stated.

Scott grabbed the stick from her hand and inspected the half bloody broken lacrosse stick. 

“Scott we have to go find him,” You muttered.

“Alright, but we’ll need everyone’s help,” Scott stood up tall and spoke with his true alpha tone. “Let’s go find your brother Lori,” Scott smiled at her.


Liam aligned his hand with the arrow plunged into the tree’s trunk and followed its end. He moved his arm hand down and noticed something in the dirt.

“Here!” He pointed to what appeared to be Brett’s phone. “I think he set a trap?”.

“He’s fighting back,” Scott said.

“And now we know he’s alive,” Malia pitched in.

“That’s good, that means there’s still time,” You tried to stay optimistic.

Lori pushed past Liam and took out the arrow. You caught a glance at the arrow she was holding. “But he’s still hurt, we need to find him, he needs to know were here,” Lori took a death breath getting ready to let out a roar, until Malia stopped her.

“You want the hunter to know were here too?” Malia asked.

“He’s new, we can take him,” Liam nodded.

“What if Brett howls back? He’ll lead the hunter right to him,” Malia protested. 

“No, we could find him first. There’s no human that can track sounds faster than we can,” Scott argued. “We got the advantage, we’ve done this before, we know what were doing guys.”

“How come I can’t catch his scent?” Malia questioned.

“He’s masking it,” Lori responded quickly

“Well can someone tell him not too!”

“H-he went this way!” Liam broke off into a sprint Lori running after him. You, Malia, and Scott all glanced at each other.

“So his traps didn’t work?” Malia stated.

“Maybe this hunter’s not such an amateur?” Scott stared at us.

“Or maybe he’s learning?”

“Either way we have to get to him before they do,” You informed them.

They agreed and started running after Liam and Lori. You following close behind them. Liam said he smelled blood and started following it, which made you feel uneasy. You just hoped you’d get to him in time.

“His trails gone,” Malia said after you five followed his blood, then ended up stopping, but it didn’t go on from anywhere else.

“Uh maybe he just stopped bleeding?” Scott said unsure.

Liam suggested that all of us split up, but Malia told him that if he wanted to decide to something stupid and die, then he should go right ahead. They broke into an argument before Malia got Scott’s attention. Although Scott was too busy at the moment to deal with them.

“Hunters? He’s covering his tracks,” Liam looked at the footsteps that Scott uncovered.

“There’s another,” Scott revealed the second set of tracks.

“Two of them?” Malia said with her arms crossed.

“Maybe more?” Scott shrugged.

“How many hunters have you seen out here before?” Lori asked us.

“A lot,” Scott nodded

“Still wanna split up?” Malia turned to Liam again.

“We can deal with it,” Liam assured us. “We just need to find Brett’s trail.”

“No we don’t, rock balancing. Satomi taught us. It’s him, and I know where he’s going,” Lori turned and faced us smiling.

Lori lead the way to the tunnels. It was long corridors of pipes and different sections. We all followed her and watched as she bent down to observe the black puddle in front of her.

“He’s been poisoned!”

“That’s why he’s not healing,” Scott said.

“What if he only has a few hours to live?” Lori eyes shown with worry.

“We are not going to let him die, we’ll find him Lori,” You placed a hand on her shoulder.

“If we howl we could find him,” Liam looked straight ahead of us.

“It’s too risky,” Malia shook her head.

“Who cares about the risk, he could be dying!” Lori retaliated.

Malia walked past her motioning to the black blood that kept going on. “He’s still moving.”

“We just need time to think.” Scott told everyone although that wasn’t what we needed to hear.

“I need him to know that I’m here, that I’m coming for him,” Lori said 

“Lori’s right,” Liam turned to Scott, “He has to know were here.”

“Liam wait!” But it was too late, Liam already let out a load roar that your pretty sure the whole town could have heard.

Not too far away from where we stood, Brett’s eyes widen as he heard the roar, while he was laying on some rail on the ceiling.

“Why didn’t he answer?” Lori asked as we kept moving down the tunnels.

“Maybe he didn’t hear us,” Liam responded.

“Maybe he can’t,” Malia stated.

We kept taking steps after steps until Scott yelled out, “Lori no!”

Lori had triggered a trip wire that was placed on the floor. An arrow flew out of the wall beside us and lodged into Scott’s stomach. You were shocked to say the least. 

All four of you started pulling and tugging trying to remove the arrow from his abdomen. You four grunted, but gave it another try and removed it. Scott immediately slid down to the floor. Liam wrapped an arm around him to steady him. Malia bent down and placed a rag on his wound to reduce the bleeding.

“They knew we were coming,” Scott grunted.

“Don’t talk, just heal…and let us figure this out,” Malia told him.

“They’ve been a step ahead of us the whole time…” Scott breathed shakily.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t wait around, we have to go,”

“We’re still three to two, were faster, and stronger,” Liam began.

“And smarter..” Scott finished.

“I don’t care who’s smarter or faster or whatever my brother’s going to die!”

“Something’s not right…?” Scott muttered, “That arrow, the trip wire, the poison. These aren’t amateurs.” Scott breathed in and out.

“But they’ve never fought us before?”

“And you’ve never fought hunters, Liam,” Scott reminded him, “We need to stick together.” 

“I need to go.” Lori said.

“No, you’re not going alone. I-I’ll go with you,” Liam stutters.

“Me too,” You nodded at her.

“Liam, you don’t know who they are or what they’re capable of.” Scott said.

“Look, I know who we are. We never give up, especially when it’s someone innocent, when it’s someone alone, when it’s one of our friends.” 

“Okay, go, go. All of you, I’ll catch up.” Scott muttered leaning his head against the pipe. 

“Go Malia, go with them. I just need need a minute, go.” Scott groaned.

“You just need to shut up.” 


“W-which way guys, there’s gotta be something?” Liam looked both left and right of the tunnels, “Did he leave anything for you to find, like, like a signal, or, more rocks?”

“I don’t hear anything…I don’t see anything,” Lori sighed.

“Well find something Lori,” You gave her a small smile.

“He’s gonna be okay.” Liam informed her.

“How do you know?”

“Cause, cause he’s strong,” Liam nodded while Lori sighed, “He’s really strong.”

“He’s knocked me down on the lacrosse field more than once,” Liam started saying.

“No lie there,” You scoffed. Liam gave you an annoyed look before continuing on.

“Now, when I see him coming, I do everything I can to get the hell out of the way.” 

“Brett actually started playing lacrosse for me,” Lori opened up as a tear fell from her eye. 

“For you?” Liam asked softly.

“I didn’t have any friends at my old school. Devenford Prep needed lacrosse players, and Brett practiced all summer. And, he got a scholarship and told them that they had to take me if they wanted him.” 

“Hey, we’re gonna find him.” Liam rubbed a hand slowly but reassuringly on her right arm.

The three of you then turned your heads different directions scrunching up your noses do to the smell.

“Do you smell that? It’s, it’s sour.” Liam faced the left of the tunnel.

“It smells like something’s rotting.” Lori said.

“I think it’s poison.” You stared at them.

“That’s how we’ll find him,” Lori let out a nervous chuckled.

You then took off in the direction the smell was coming from. Every turn you took felt the same to you, and your pretty sure Lori felt the same way as well.

“They all look the same, are you sure we’re going the right way?” Lori questioned.

“Yeah Liam I feel like we came down this way already.” You pitched in.

“I’m positive. I’ve gotten lost down her before, more than once. Just follow the scent.” Liam said while walking with quick steps.

“I hate that scent,” Lori complained.

“-Wait. I hear something,” Liam stopped abruptly. We all stopped and listened with our ears. “It sounds like-”

“-A heartbeat.” Lori finished.

We all looked at one another before taking off in a sprint. We made a sharp left entering another path of the tunnels. There was a big opening up ahead and we all stopped to look around until Lori spoke up.

“Brett!” Lori sighed falling on her knees next to him. You and Liam sighed in relief. You slowly approached him and sat on your heels on his right.

“You found the rocks.“ Brett muttered.

“Yeah, I found the rocks.” Lori chuckled.

Brett then noticed you, “Y/N? I thought I told you..to get out of here.” He muttered.

“You told me to get out of the parking out. You never told me I couldn’t save you. Besides you ran out on our kiss…” You stated smiling a little as your cheeks turned a shade of pink. Brett saw and smirked a little. He grabbed a hold of your hand and gripped it tightly. You glanced at your hands intertwined before pushing back his hair and caressing his cheek. He leaned into your palm. 

You pecked his cheek staining your lips with the black blood, but you didn’t care. You just wanted to get him out of here.

“I’m sorry did I miss something…?” Liam motioned between the two of you.

“Liam.” Brett looked up at Liam.

“Hey, we’re gonna get you out of here.” Liam grabbed Bretts hand pulling him up on his feet.

“You’re a dumbass…for doing this.”

“Oh, it that your way of thanking me?” Liam rose an eyebrow.

“No, that’s my way of calling you a dumbass, but thanks,” Brett breathed out. You and Lori both stood on his sides, trying to steady and keep him up right.

Liam turned around to the tunnel furrowing his eyebrows, until there was a flash off light and fog started filling up the tunnel.

“They’re coming!” Lori informed.

“Okay, go I’ll hold ‘em off.” Liam said.

“I’ll go with you!” You told him.

“No stay with Brett and Lori, just get him out of here.” Liam said.

A shrilling noise started going off hurting your hears, making you cover them. Brett and Liam covered their ears, before Liam yelled over the noise.

“Go, go!” Liam growled. 

You got on Brett’s right side again and you and Lori ran past Liam to get him out of there. You kept turning corners and struggled to keep Brett on his feet. 

“Lori which way?!” You shouted over the device that was going off.

“Just a little further, we’re almost out of here.” Lori said has Brett still had his ears covered. You turned another corner and continued walking straight. You then felt Lori stop. You followed to where her gaze was which was towards a ladder.

“Brett come on let’s get you out of here,” You and Lori made sure he was alright as he pulled himself up the ladder once he reached the top he removed the disk. 

“Okay, go Lori.” You watched as she climbed her way up and out to where Brett was. 

You followed shortly after her not even out the whole when you heard Liam shouting.

“Lori, no! Y/N, Lori, wait!” You could hear the fear in his voice. You saw him come around the corner.

“Liam?!” You stared at him wide eyed, until you glanced up at the hole. 

“It’s a trap, Y/N!” You immediately climbed all your up and out. Once you were out you noticed the front of a truck run into Brett and Lori. Their bodies hit the street with a thud.

“NO!” Your cried out as you ran to them. You dropped to your knees. 

Upon hearing your cry Liam eyes turned gold and he leaped out of the hole. His eyes and fangs and claws full on display. He slowly turned around and watched as you had placed his head in your lap and Lori gazing over her brother with tears in her eyes. She grasped his hand.

“Brett, come on!” You pleaded. “I don’t hate you. I never once hated you!” You grabbed his other hand trying to take as much of his pain as you could. You glanced at Lori and watched as the veins in her hands slowly started to vanish. 

“Close your eyes.” Lori spoke to him.

“No, noo,” You whispered not wanting this to happen. You shook your head as tears spilled from your eyes.

Lori rested her head on his shoulder. “I couldn’t take away his pain.” She looked up at Liam sobbing quietly, then she stopped. You listened to the sound of her heart give out its last beat.

Liam let out an anguished roar at the lost of his friends. Everyone around you watched with fear in their eyes. They were scared…

You couldn’t move. All you could do was stare at their lifeless bodies. Every inch of your body felt numb to the pain. This shouldn’t have happened, you thought. They didn’t deserve this. You choked up a sob and the tears started flowing down your cheeks. 

“NOOOOO!” You cried in agony. 

You didn’t care if everyone was giving you looks. You would never get the chance to express to Brett how you felt about him. He was gone, and he wasn’t coming back. You lost what could have been the start of happy relationship for once in your life, you lost a friend, a sister.

You didn’t bother moving from your place. You looked down at Brett’s motionless face and stroked his hair slowly. You leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss on his forehead. You felt a tear roll down your check and saw it fall on his cheek. You were never going to get the chance to tell him that you loved him. You wanted all the pain to go away, yet you felt so numb that you didn’t feel the only humanity you had left, turn off completely.


Permanent Tags:

@siennarossi @monsis-world @onceuponateenpanwolfian @maria96bvb @thequaksonclackson@hannahweeks @teen-river-wolf @totallyrandomfandomfangirl @arkhamasylumpatient-blog1@daringbanshee @decaffeinated-fangirl @love-feels-like-loneliness @clean-and-claire @fireismysaftey@smazztastic @raindancer2004 @therealsweetspawn @baskinrobinsalwaysfindsout@zuni21798 @fuckthatfeeling @delaney-e-carpenter @fightpain-with-morepain

Bound I

A/N: “Can you do one where you find out you can talk to someone through your head and it turns out to be Harry?“ THIS WAS SUPER FUN! let me know if you guys want me to continue. Enjoy!

 It’s not typical for Y/n to bring guys home after a night out…that’s not her style. She’s old-fashioned and prefers to exchange numbers with a lad, maybe go on an actual date before she gives him a taste. But that’s most nights.

   Tonight, she’s internally vowing to never drink again as she lets the hands of this stranger explore her figure, his lips leaving kisses on any area of exposed skin. Her hands leave his soft, blonde locks to reach down and find her keys. As fun as this is, she could definitely do without the feeling of her back being pressed up against her cold door. Her hearts racing at the excitement of it all but in the back of her mind lies a bit of guilt. He’s not even her type; she hopes he isn’t getting the wrong impression.

   Once inside, he pushes the door shut for her. They kick off their shoes and stumble their way into the cozy living room of her loft. They finally come up for air after what seemed like the world’s longest make out session. She uses this time to pull her tight dress down, kicking it out of the way. The fellow, whose name she can’t remember, finishes unbuttoning his shirt before he drops it behind him. 

Hey sits down on the couch and not too long after, Y/n straddles him, grinding down on his bulge. She can feel herself getting wetter with every rotation of her hips.


Meanwhile, a few miles away…

“Another shot!” Harry hears. He sighs but can’t hide the smirk that creeps on his face as he picks up his second shot of the night. He takes it fast “God, that never get easier” he coughs. His friends pat him on the back, being proper dicks about one measly shot.

“Atta boy, Styles!” 

  What they don’t know is, he slyly told the bartender to fill his glasses with club soda. Yes, he was lying to his friends but he didn’t feel like hearing their whines about him being “No fun!”. He’s having a good time, he really is but he’d just rather be at home right now. He doesn’t really like going out so often, he always seems to find himself mentally exhausted and annoyed with the atmosphere. 

“I’m gonna head out” He tells his friends, they try to convince him to stay and have just one more shot and as much as he would like to keep tricking them into thinking he was actually getting hammered, he just wants to get home. “Guys really I’m just-”

His thoughts are interrupted.

He hears what sounds to be a woman moaning which normally wouldn’t surprise him in this setting. People tend to do nasty shit in clubs like this but it sounded so close; almost like he had headphones on. He brushes it off until it happens again. He knows he probably looks insane, touching his ears and looking around like a crazy person.

“Ahh…I’m so wet” The voice whimpers. He can feel himself getting harder by the second. It’s times like these he wishes he wasn’t so easy to excite. He could literally just overhear someone talk about breasts and before he knows it, he’s stiff down there.

His eyebrows furrow and he quickly covers his erection, obviously not wanting anyone to see. He bids his friends goodbye before rushing out of the club and to his car which isn’t too far from the building. He’s thanking his lucky stars for the parking spot he chose. Harry gets in and rests his head on the steering wheel, trying to will this boner away. He’s still utterly confused but his main mission at the moment is to relax enough to drive home. He can deal with it there. 

Then, as clear as day, he hears the moans again. He whips his head around to the backseat of his car because it sounded that close. There’s nobody there. It doesn’t stop, and it certainly isn’t helping his raging hard-on, which he can now feel leaking in his trousers. “mmm” it continues “Fuck”


At Y/n’s

“Fuck” she moans, her nameless friend ruts his covered member up as she grinds down harder on him. She soaking now and just wants to feel him inside her already. She unbuckles his belt and slides off of him so that she’s lying her back upon the couch.

Back to Harry

He sits there, scared but also frustrated. He convinces himself that he’s hearing voices because he’s so horny…or maybe the bartender slipped him some actual alcohol. He fumbles with his belt, looking around the dark lot to make sure there aren’t any bystanders that could potentially witness him at his absolute worst. 

He finally frees his cock, it springs up and smudges a little pre-cum on his black button down. It’s real now…the fact that he actually just got hard for no reason. “Why the fuck is this happening” he groans. 

Y/N

“Why the fuck is this happening?” She hears. She pushes her hands against the man’s chest so she can look him in the eyes. “What do you mean?” She giggles. 

“What are you talking about?” He replies before lining his head up with her slit. “You just asked why this was happening”. The look on his face tells her that he has no idea what she’s talking about. She laughs it off, saying that she probably heard her neighbors or something. 

He pushes in, filling her up with one stroke. Her eyes close at the sensation and she forgets all about what she was just concerned about. Her nails rake his back and she arches into him, shifting the angle slightly.

“Yes! Right there”

In Harry’s Car

“Yes right there” 

Harry is going mad at this point, labored breathing and flushed skin. His eyes are shut tight, jaw locked, he’s as red as a tomato and he doesn’t know how much more of this he can take. He’s successfully fighting the urge to just scream out until he hears another purr.

“Deeper” She sighs. Its the last straw for him. Harry bangs his balled up fist against the wheel 

“STOP! SHUT UP!” He roars. Only then, does the silence win. He listens for it…nothing. Its gone. He clears his throat and finally looks up and out of his car window. Standing there is a group of friends who seem to be walking into the club. They’re staring at him like he has three heads and he may as well. To Harry, that would be more manageable than hearing voices in his fucking head.

Y/n

“STOP! SHUT UP!” She jumps and accidentally knocks her forehead into the one right above hers. “Ow fuck!” He sits up and rubs the afflicted area. 

“Well, that’s what you get! Why would you yell at me like that?!” She asks as she stands up and wraps herself in the small blanket that was folded over the arm of the couch. “What the fuck are you-…you’re crazy” He muttered. He pulls his clothes back on, not caring to button up his shirt. Y/n doesn’t respond, she just stands there and waits for him to collect his things. She knows she isn’t losing her mind, it couldn’t have been the neighbors. It was so close, she can literally still feel her ears ringing. Maybe its best if he does leave.

“All I wanted was a fuck and I got stuck with a fucking psycho” He chuckled. He slams the door behind himself.

Harry

He’s almost to his flat now; the car ride is silent, he doesn’t feel like hearing anything right now. Anything. He’s just glad that whatever that was, stopped and that his hard on is at a mild throb now. He can just tug one out in the shower tonight.

Then the unthinkable happens. He hears her again. This time, it sounds like she is…talking instead of moaning. He pulls into the nearest gas station to get a better listen. He might as well ease drop if its going to keep happening. 

Y/n’s Loft

Y/n decided to call her best friend, Elena and tell her about what the fuck just happened. She wants to get a second opinion and make sure she isn’t actually crazy.

“So…I swear, at first I heard him ask why it was happening and he acted like he didn’t say anything”

“Wow what the fuck? Did it sound like him?” her friend pressed. “I mean.. not really but it just sounded like it was right there.” Y/n started. “I’m not gonna lie, it sounded a little rougher than his voice. I think that’s part of the reason I freaked out, it kind of turned me off” She joked, Elena laughed along with her


Harry

Harry’s eyes had widened. He’s pretty sure that whoever he’s hearing is talking about him. So they could hear him too? He still doesn’t understand any of this but he feels slightly relieved knowing he isn’t completely alone.

“I think that’s part of the reason I freaked out, it kind of turned me off”

“Hey!” he whines before quickly covering his mouth. He hadn’t meant to say anything, it just came out. What she said kind of offended him, seeing as girls often tell him his voice is sexy and sensual.

Y/n

“Hey!” She heard. It was the voice again. She looked around her living room, her first thought being that someone had to be in her house. And of course she’s still standing in only a blanket, so if there is some robber in her home, he’ll probably try to take advantage of her. She told Elena she would have to call her back, she was too distracted to really hear what she was saying anyway. Maybe it was stupid to get off of the phone at a time like this but she just needed to think clearly and listen for the voice again.

“Hello?” she whispered

“….uhm…hello?” she heard. She screamed and ran for the door, still in only a blanket. She stopped when she heard the voice scream as well, sounding just as scared.

“Jesus! Fuck stop screaming you scared the shit out of me!” she heard. Only now does she realize that the voice is coming from within; she just ran across the loft and its still right in her ear.


Harry

“I scared you?! Who ar- what is this?!” She spits out. Harry runs a hand through his hair, putting his cell phone up to his ear to hide the fact that he’s talking to himself just in case anyone decides to look at him.

“I don’t know. I really don’t but I’m just glad I’m not the only one” he sighed. “Or maybe I am and this is just a delusion” He chuckles, everything is so fucked up but he’s always been the type to find the humor in serious situations.

“Ok” Y/n starts. “Let’s just…let’s figure this out together”

anonymous asked:

You're either a trans man in denial or a terf. Your opinions and pussy obsession are borderlibe terfy lmao

This is so funny because I love that just not transitioning and being a vagina obsessed freak (errrrrr I mean problematic cis gay who is totally not a monster but whose sexuality is just uhhhh broken, unfortunately) is TERF stuff to you because you’ve circled back around to classically homiphobic idea that being a woman and gay is bad but found a new reason to justify it, regardless of actual politics around transness.

Not gonna lie, if you’d caught me at 19 when I was just coming to understand my sexuality and beginning to reidentify you’d have succeeded in upsetting me a little. Now that I’m a grownup and not even slightly capable of being fooled into thinking that liking pussy is a sin, I’m just publishing this for other people to laugh at you. Lighten up though, really- there’s nothing wrong with a wet chin.

anonymous asked:

I'm really glad that you put the ace flag behind Christine and Jenna! As a panromantic, I'm really happy that you gave lots of representation other than bi and gay! Although I'm not gonna lie, I have this fear that people mistake aces for being aro as wellI. I really hope you know that ace is just when you're not sexually attracted to people, but are capable of romantic attraction. Sorry if this seems like I'm accusing you, I just get really worried about it because people say it all the time.

ofc i know!! i actually wasn’t sure whether to add different versions to christine and jenna’s but thanks for coming into my inbox!! and its ok i understand that :O!

Riverdale Chapter 5 Recap:

OBVIOUSLY THIS HAS SPOILERS BELOW*****

This episode….. I can’t even BEGIN. Omg I’m so fucked. This show….

• Jughead Jealous ASF when Betty said she had “a date” I don’t even ship Bughead but this episode has me leaning into their lane.

• Jughead all bashful when he smiled shyly and looked to the side OMG I KID YOU NOT I WAS SCREAMING. Another Bughead scene, writers are really pushing it.

• Veronica was soooooooo jealous when Archie said she was hanging with Val. It was cute not gonna lie even though I’m Beronica and Jarchie >>>>>> Bughead and Varchie.

• Archie shirtless and sweaty…. nothing more to add here.

• Miss Grundy is finally gone.

• Cheryl going on about her brother again… but this time it was really endearing. I have to say though, they do seem a little incestuous but maybe I just can’t relate to having a sibling I actually like.

• Anyone sorta shipping Archie and Val??? To be honest Archie looks like he’s in love with every character on the fucking show 😂😂

• We finally find out more about Polly Engagement, possibly self harm but more likely suicide attempt. Nothing is adding up yet with her storyline but I think we get to meet her soon. Everyone confuses Betty for Polly though, do they really look that much alike.

• MY FAV KEVIN ONLY HAD TWO LINES IN THE WHOLE EPISODE BUT HE MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD WITH THE LOOK ON HIS FACE WHEN MRS. BLOSSOM WAS CARESSING ARCHIES FACE OMGGGGGGGGGGG

• Blossoms vs. Coopers, it all started with a bottle of syrup and a murder… We find out that Betty’s Dad isn’t so innocent at all, but would he really go far enough to kill Jason?

• I personally believe Jason’s parents killed Jason…

• I wasn’t a Cheryl Stan before…. but now I’m in love with her. This smol fiery red head does not deserve the words she gets from her mother, and I’m gonna be so upset if the writers actually send her away to boarding school.

• I would’ve liked more Jarchie 😕

• Also, Jughead’s home situation wasn’t brought up again 🤔

• Veronica’s Mom is going through some deep shit lmfaooo and possibly something good happened for Veronica’s Dad? An inference from Mrs. Blossoms comment about “have you come here to gloat?”

• Archie finally picked music over football, although he still going to be on the team.

I think that’s it wow, all in all this episode was 15/10. My crops are thriving, my skin is clearer, I just ran into some money, life is great and so is this show tbhhhhhhhhhh.

This is for my people who don’t have a g-spot up their ass.

Porn is definitely not a role model. The same way that movies make life and romance seem way more magical than it really is, porn makes sex seem waaayyyyy different than it actually is. One of the prime examples of this for me is getting fucked in the ass. Like I know y'all know what I’m talking about. In porn women cum like crazy over being fucked in the ass, they make it seem like it’s a glorious feeling and those not doing it are missing out. Lemme tell y'all it is definitely not like they make it seem.
Now I’m not gonna lie, I like getting dick up my ass but at first I hated it, mostly because it was hard for me to to make the distinction between porn and reality. Your ass needs training before it’s ready to take on some major dick-age.

Take MAJOR precautions. This goes for everyone getting fucked in the ass. Unlike vaginas, our assholes do not lubricate themselves, and if it’s dry and getting severely pounded it could have some big health repercussion. Be careful ya’ll. My partner and I carry a travel-sized lube with us in the car just in case. Also, face down-ass up is not just a sexy position, it’s honestly one of the best and easiest positions for a dick to easily slide right in. Again, always make sure ya’ll clean before AND after, especially the dick-partner.

I also strongly recommend to NOT have vaginal sex after anal sex, unless the dick has been thoroughly cleansed because that shit is not hygienic.

Take care of yourself my loves, and have fun getting your ass dicked if that’s what ya’ll want ;)

2

“Yeah, dude, I guess. But, like, this is a fuckin’ liberal arts college, brah. Isn’t everyone in a band?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never met anyone in a band before. I’m not in a band. Well, I’m in some school bands, but that’s not really… um. What kind of music do you play?”
“…Well.”

in which instead of actually playing hockey, the guys play shitty (pun intended) DIY punk in a band called Soft Hands. classically-trained pianist eric bittle doesn’t quite know what’s hit him.

posters for @heyfightme ‘s fic Baking is Punk As Fuck . So I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been obsessed with this fic forever? And I’m so happy yet sad that it’s done now?? I’ve already reread the earlier chapters like soooo many times. The lines are great, Bitty’s narrative is so realistic in this new setting. Punk Jack Zimmermann is the love of my life and I’m also VERY obsessed with him (like seriously, way to get me to love Jack). And I think I can speak for a lot of people when I say this fic reignited my love of punk. So yea, this fic is amazeballs