i actually kind of want to watch it right now haha

Hey, it’s me again, subverting your favorite tropes,

So we all know Yuuri Katsuki would be the kind of person who wouldn’t tell you he didn’t like mushrooms and would let you feed him mushrooms three meals a day rather than actually let the words “I don’t like mushrooms” emerge from his mouth

Because Anxiety™ am I right folks

But here we can flip this on its head.

Yuuri loves mushrooms.

Mushrooms are Yuuri’s favorite part of any given dish, which is why he separates them out from the rest usually and eats them last. That’s some excellent fungus right there.

Along comes Viktor Nikiforov, he of the lust-inspiring good looks and astoundingly poor social intuition. He watches the Love of His Life pick the mushrooms meticulously out of his dish and says, “Are you going to eat those?”

Yuuri Katsuki is still in a state of complete and utter stupor at this point, because within the last week two discrete–not discreet, mind you, which they are the opposite of–Russians have arrived uninvited to his fucking house, ingratiated themselves to his family an are currently dismantling the very threads of his existence. One of these Russians is his longtime crush (who is currently occupying most of his time lounging around in a provocative manner all but holding a sign over his crotch that reads Reserved seat for Yuuri Katsuki but Yuuri is a little bit feelings-blind so he’s reading it as Look how beautiful and untouchable I am! If you stare at me too long I will literally scar you like the sun and also I CAN HEAR EVERY THOUGHT ABOUT ME YOU’VE HAD SINCE AGE TWELVE! I’M DISGUSTED!) and the other is the actual inspiration for the My Chemical Romance song Teenagers.

So Yuuri can’t quite be blamed for saying no when Viktor Nikiforov asks him if he’s going to eat his favorite part of the dish.

“I’ll take them, then,” Viktor says, and picks them off his plate.

HOW ROMANTIC, Viktor’s brain screams.

Thus begins Yuuri’s mushroomless existence. Viktor loves Yuuri and wants him to Be Happy Always, and so makes a point to ensure that a mushroom never even so much as winks at his fiance ever again. He doesn’t put them in food and always ensures that, if he’s ordering something for Yuuri, it’s without mushrooms. When a dish shows up with mushrooms in it, Viktor deftly picks them out.

“Excuse me, my husband does not like mushrooms,” Viktor says so often that it could be his catchphrase, or perhaps a nickname. Viktor “My Husband Does Not Like Mushrooms” Nikiforov.

This continues until they return to Hasetsu for a visit and Yuuri’s entire family watches as Viktor picks every mushroom off Yuuri’s plate.

It’s a dish with a lot of mushrooms in it.

“You must really like mushrooms,” Mari says to Viktor.

“Oh, not particularly,” Viktor says, picking away. “But Yuuri hates them, so.”

“Oh no,” Yuuri whispers.

“Um,” says Mari.

“That’s funny!” says Hiroko, smiling and leaning her head on her hand. “Yuuri used to love mushrooms! He stole them while I was chopping them.”

“Wow that’s weird,” Viktor says.

“Yeah,” Yuuri mumbles. “Haha, weird. Yeah, weird.”

Viktor slowly turns his head. His plate is now Mount Mushroom. “Kitten,” he says slowly.

“Ahhhh,” Yuuri whimpers.

“Do we need to have that conversation about communication again?” Viktor asks.

“AHHHHH.” Yuuri attempts to crawl under the table.

The answer, for the record, is yes. They’ve had this conversation fourteen times since Barcelona.

“Why am I like this,” Yuuri whispers to himself later that night. Viktor kisses his shoulder and, when they get back to Russia, makes him a pot of Stroganoff that is roughly 89% mushrooms.

Fueled By Desire (NSFW 18+)

A/N: So, today has been a crazy day but I started writing this last night and wanted to post it tonight ! So I wrote it in virtually 24 hours, so I hope it didn’t suck to bad. I planned on posting it earlier but I had a bit of writers block. This a Theo smut that you can thank @hardladyheart for. She’s filled my mind with dirty Theo thoughts. (Fun fact’ this gif is actually mine and my blog name used to be twfanfic-af)

Thanks to: @writing-obrien and @hardladyheart for editing and proof reading.

Warning: SMUTTTTT

Word Count: 2803

Originally posted by stilinski-jpeg

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guys but listen

  • so after the foxes win everyone starts paying attention to them
  • suddenly the press is all over their social media and wants them on talk shows and panels all the time
  • and they do it bc they could use some good publicity tbh and they rly need a bigger team
  • one day allison (her and neil are bffs now dont fight me on this i s2g) is watching tv w neil and he is rly into what’s happening and she pulls out her sc and starts taking a video
  • she holds the camera so both their faces show and goes “hey neil” and and when he starts to look over she kisses him on the cheek (allison reynolds does not give 2 shits about neil’s scars and she’s gonna show every1)
  • the video ends just as neil smiles
  • ppl on the internet lose their shit !! this video is everywhere
  • allison moved on from seth and NEIL JOSTEN is dating a teammate
  • so they go on a lowkey trashy talk show (and everyone warns neil to keep his mouth shut)
  • the lady is like “so neil i hear ur in a relationship with one of ur teammates”
  • all the foxes hold their breath he’s too unpredictable
  • wymack takes a drink
  • andreil arent hiding anything really they just dont do pda so neil is like “oh ya we like to keep our relationship private tho lets talk about exy”
  • and she is like “well it didnt look like you were keeping it private when allison posted this on her sc” and she plays the video
  • all the foxes start laughing except kevin, andrew, and aaron
  • allison is literally losing her shit and matt has trouble breathing for a few seconds
  • and the lady is like “…um did i miss something haha”
  • and nicky takes pity on her “we’re just laughing bc neil and allison are definitely not dating sry”
  • and she is like “???????????? but ur still dating a teammate”
  • kevin quickly redirects the conversation back to exy bc they do not have the time to sit here and talk about andreil’s love life jfc
  • she cant get anything else out of them
  • so ppl are just losing their minds for like a week trying to figure out who neil is dating when renee posts a pic on instagram of them w the caption “neil drove me to lunch and paid for my meal” ((they actually talk about andrew lol))
  • and now every1 is like omg !! this is it!!
  • so the foxes are doing a panel and they get through a decent amount of exy related questions and then
  • “i have a question for neil. would u like to comment on ur relationship w renee walker??”
  • “id like to comment that my relationship w renee is that we r good friends and that id like to talk about exy now”
  • they cant get anything else out of anyone
  • so now ppl rly confused bc neil is a Straight Man and only Dan is left but her and Matt are very publicly dating 
  • what kind of sexual deviancy is this ??????????? is neil josten engaging in some kind of polyamorous relationship with his teammates?????? no one can answer
  • ok so next talk show 
  • this woman barely gets the introductions out before she leaps right in
  • “neil are you currently in a relationship with dan wilds despite the fact that she is dating matt boyd?” 
  • neil has had enough
  • this boy just wants to play exy hes too old for this
  • he just stares at her
  • he cant even speak like who is this woman??
  • he didnt ask to dismantle heteronormativity in america but apparently he has to
  • “i dont have a gf”
  • she stares back
  • “are you no longer in a relationship with one of your teammates as you previously stated?????”
  • the foxes are getting worried neil might kill her
  • it’s getting very hard not to laugh
  • neil stares a little longer
  • “i dont have a gf
  • the host’s eyes widen
  • the audience goes silent
  • “am i to understand that neil josten, breakout exy player of the year, has just come out??”
  • ppl start clapping (some ppl boo and nicky starts to flip them off before kevin grabs his hand)
  • this woman has just gotten one of the best stories of her life on live television
  • she cant stop smiling
  • once again kevin steers the conversation back to exy (even when he isnt insulting ppl why does neil always have to cause problems ??) and doesnt let her go back
  • there’s wild speculation about which boy he’s dating bc it doesnt makes sense ?????/
  • aaron has been seen kissing katelyn after games
  • kevin and thea are now officially dating
  • nicky is v vocal about his bf (like 12 times a day on twitter)
  • matt and dan are definitely still dating
  • andrew is not capable of relationships ????? and him and neil hate each other ???/
  • the answer comes 3 weeks later
  • they are all in the girls’ room for a movie night
  • everyone but renee is slightly drunk
  • allison and renee take a cute pic
  • in the background u can kinda see neil asleep on andrew who in a rare display of affection actually has a hand in his hair
  • allison notices right before she posts it on instagram but andreil have already said that they arent rly trying to hide their relationship they just arent going to go out of their way just for crazy talk show hosts
  • and DAMN
  • the way they are leaning against each other is unmistakable (esp in light of recent news) 
  • neil josten and andrew minyard are in a relationship?????? have been in a relationship?????? the ppl need confirmation
  • neil’s twitter (that he uses to retweet exy players and occasionally start fights w them) is being blown up
  • finally he goes on twitter and makes his first original tweet 
  • “Andrew is my boyfriend.”
  • twitter literally explodes and “andreil” is trending for a week
just another coffee shop AU

So this was part of a not!fic challenge but it ended up as more of a fic than a not!fic, so I’m posting it here. The challenge was to put a trope in my inbox and I’d tell you about the story I’d write. (Honestly, I’m tempted to adapt this and try to do it as orig fic, haha) So enjoy.

It’s harder than you think to get a job in a little podunk town that’s mostly home to fishermen. Dex takes what he can get, and what he can get is a job dishing out lattes and scones at the little pretentious coffee house that vacationing yuppies love to frequent on their way to Maine’s outlet malls. It’s barely a living, but Dex doesn’t need much.

He serves coffee one day to the preppiest of the prep – a luxuriously coiffed writer who tells him that the coffee shop has the perfect atmosphere for inspiration. Dex snorts. This is a guy who wears his stubble purposely rough, to achieve some kind of effect. He probably wears “pre-distressed” clothing (although right now his outfit’s actually really sharp, with this vest over a fuzzy, tight-fitting sweater.)

The writer challenges him. “Come on, you have to have a little poetry in your soul?”

“I sold my soul for a three-dollar latte,” Dex replies.

The man laughs, and goddamn, even his teeth are perfect.

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anonymous asked:

“the woman who has his damndelion heart" Oh my god this was amazing! So cute . I loved it so much. Is there going to be a next part?

Aww hun my heart is bursting from your kind words, thank you so much! I don’t think I’m going to write a part III anytime soon since I had a bit of difficulty writing part II haha … maybe sometime in the future I will pick up the story but who knows. I will, however, leave you with this little blurb I had written as part of the series but never actually put it into the story. I’d imagine it fit right in between Braids and Excuses


Catnap

When he finds you on the couch, a few hours later, reading your anatomy textbook, he sighs from relief at the familiar sight (and the peace and quiet). Anne had graciously offered to shift the reunion to the backyard to give you a quiet place to study even though you had originally asked to go the library for a few hours. The clangs of glasses echoed slightly from outside, but you didn’t seem to mind, lost in your own world from the way you hadn’t noticed Harry plopping himself next to you, laying his head on your comfortable shoulder while crossing his arms in an exhausted sigh.

“Love?”  

You refused to indulge him, determined to finish this week’s chapter.

“Pet?” 

The feeling of his curls rubbed sweetly against your neck as he peered up to look at you (damn him).

Muppet?

“Harry!” you snapped stretching his name in annoyance. “Jus’ give me a sec.” You took a deep breath to calm yourself as you flipped a page of your book roughly, eyes still concentrating on your readings. 

“Hmm,” a familiar accusing tone surfaced in his groggy voice, “someone’s gettin’ snippy…”

His comment was ignored once again, but he didn’t mind. He felt quite smug at the moment. The ever so patient Y/N had crumbled slightly in the depths of his over-eager family (despite him triggering the hindrance).

“She lasted longer than anyone,” Harry thought to himself, eyes grazing over the complicated words of her book. His eyes dropped slightly, as a deep wave of exhaustion over took him. He gazed over to his family through the glassed doors, his sister was holding Jamie in her arms and he was grateful for the moment of peace without the little one. He loved her to bits of course, but she exhausted the wits out of him. He closed his eyes, finally, as a deep slumber over took his body.

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Lancelot Idea (+Lotor headcanons and Klance)

This is gonna be a very long post that features a lot of my ideas that I thought of, like, ten minutes ago. I’d like to make this into a comic/fanfic but if anyone else wants to as well, go ahead! Link it to me somehow cuz I’d love to read it and die cuz I’ll love you forever ahhh

It’s about 1,700 words, hehehe…I got really carried away. sorry about any mistakes too, I wrote this as fast as possible lol. I’ll put it under a cut.

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Teachers AU with flirty gym teacher!Marinette requested by @stirredbrew

Sorry in advance, this is longer than I imagined it would be and also she doesn’t get flirty for a little while rip (also i didn’t include a lot of flirting rlly so)

  • Marinette Dupain-Cheng loves fashion. And she loves working out, being active, anything that takes her breath away.
  • Because of her interest in both, her dream is to start her own brand of sportswear for women (some with pockets definitely), but in the meantime, she works at her old collège as a PE teacher and makes clothes on commission or for herself
  • She’s been working there for a couple of years, and she absolutely loves the kids that come through. Her students usually love her too, because she’s really understanding but also doesn’t take crap
  • There have been whispers, both among the students and staff, that a new maths teacher would be coming in. She brushes it off.
  • One day, when her students are supposed to be running laps, they’re instead in groups, chattering excitedly.
  • “What’s going on?” Mari asks, because she is a poor clueless babe.
  • They tell her that the new maths teacher’s finally here, and a few of them will be switching to his class. She’s a bit curious, because she hadn’t seen him yet. She lets her class talk a little more before telling them they can talk and walk at the same time.
  • While she’s watching them go, she hears the doors open behind her and turns to see if someone came late, but is surprised by the headmaster and a person she doesn’t recognize
  • He’s tall, has longer blond hair that’s pulled back into a short ponytail, and looks kind of lanky. She smirks as she thinks about how her parents would try to feed him their entire kitchen if they met him.
  • She calls out for her students to finish their warm-up laps before strutting over. The headmaster tells her she was just showing their new maths teacher around.
  • Said new guy smiles at her kindly and holds out his hand. She grabs it, and maybe squeezes a little too tight, but he doesn’t seem to notice.
  • “I’m Adrien,” he tells her. She finds it odd that he left off his last name, but introduces herself anyways.
  • “Marinette Dupain-Cheng,” she says, giving him a small smile. “You can address me by my last name.”

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Big Girl - Michael Clifford Smut

 i wrote this a while ago i literally have no idea how bad it sucks ass but it probably sucks hard

—————————————————

“Mom no! I don’t need a babysitter I’m 18 for god’s sake!”

“No Y/N! The last time i left you home alone you almost burned the house down! And it’s not like he’s a complete stranger. It’s just Michael.” Her parents were going out for a business dinner and they hired Michael Clifford to babysit her.

Michael was 19, he graduated last year and he took a gap year to travel with his mates. That meant he needed money badly. They were neighbours and her parents invited the Cliffords over for dinner quite often but Y/N never had a proper conversation with him however she knew how cocky he was. He had the biggest ego. Always bragging about himself and trying to show off. Never the less she always had a slight crush on him. There was something mesmerising about him.

“We’re leaving now and he’ll be arriving in 15 minutes. Be kind to him and don’t cause any trouble!”

After kissing her parents goodbye Y/N decided to prepare some snacks to watch some movies. Her parents weren’t going to come back until midnight and Michael probably wasn’t gonna pay her attention, she needed to entertain herself until then.

She was going through movies when she heard the knocking on the door.

“Come in the door isn’t locked.” she yelled. She knew it was Michael. Who else would knock on her door at 8:30pm?

“You know you really should lock the door when you’re home alone. Im kind enough to not kidnap you but someone else might.”

“Haha funny Michael.” she was being sarcastic but she knew Michael was kinda right. She wasn’t gonna admit that of course. Michael’s ego was already big enough.

Michael plopped himself next to Y/N on the couch and asked “So what are we watching?”

“We? So THE Michael Clifford wants to spend time with me i’m honored.”

“Don’t flatter yourself i kinda have to cause there’s nothing else to do.”

“Sure.” she snickered. She knew he was being sarcastic. That was how their friendship was. Sarcastic remarks and mean comments.

They settled on watching a random movie which turned out quite boring.

“Why do you need a babysitter anyways?” Michael asked.

“The last time i was home alone i almost burned the house down so my mom doesn’t think i should be left alone anymore. But im a big girl i know i can take care of myself.”

“Big girl huh?” Michael had a smirk when he said that.

“Yes i turned 18 two weeks ago.”

“Truth or dare?”

“What?” she honestly was surprised by his question she wasn’t expecting this. “Truth i guess..”

“Are you a virgin?” she was taken aback from the sudden question.

“N-no.” she shyly answered. She’d much rather her first time being with Michael. The guy who took her virginity was an asshole. “Truth or dare?” she was already thinking of a smart thing to ask him.

“No you choose one.”

“It’s your turn.”

“Im in charge right now don’t you think? Do as i say.”

“Truth.” she didn’t want to take chances and she was pissed with Michael reminding her that he was in charge. Although the thought of Michael being in charge turned her on.

“What’s your biggest turn on?”

“Dare. Can i change it?” she couldn’t tell him that the thought of him tying her down and fucking her mercilessly while she called him daddy made her panties soak.

“No princess. You chose truth and now you have to answer.”

“Umm i g-guess my partner being umm you know dominant would turn me on.”

“I dare you to suck my cock.”

“WHAT?!”

“C'mon babygirl i know you want to. I know how much i turn you on. I bet you’re wet right now.” He was right. Thinking about him fucking her did turn her on.

She got on her knees. It was the moment she was waiting for all her life wasn’t it?

“Michael i’ve only done this once. I don’t know how to do it.”

“It’s ok princess i’ll guide you.”

She unbuttoned his pants, Michael lifted his hips so Y/N could take off his pants and boxers faster.

When Y/N saw his cock she was amazed. He was bigger than the boy who took her virginity and thicker. She was nervous to touch it let alone put it in her mouth.

“What happened?” Michael needed her mouth. Or her hands. Anything. He just wanted to feel her touch.

“It’s just that you’re bigger than my ex.” she didn’t even care if she was flattering his ego even more.

“It’s ok Y/N it’s not gonna bite see.” He started stroking his cock. “Try it c'mon.” Michael replaced his hand with hers and she slowly started stroking him.

“Ugh Y/N it feels so good. Take it in your mouth please.” how could she say no to him when he ask like that? She took him in her mouth. She struggled to fit him in her mouth but managed to do it. She started stroking the parts she couldn’t fit in her mouth with her hands.

“Yes yes yes babygirl does daddy’s cock feels good in your mouth?” Daddy? She never thought Michael would have a daddy kink. She hoped but she never thought he actually had it.

She stopped sucking for a brief moment and said “Yes daddy.”

“Stop stop come here.” Michael pulled her up and sat her on her lap. They started making out passionately.  Michael tried to take off her shirt and  bra without stopping the kiss.

“Fuck babygirl your tits are amazing.” He massaged her boobs and flicked her nipples.

“Daddy please do something!” “What do you want daddy to do baby? You want daddy to fuck you?”

Y/N could only nod and Michael eagerly unbuttoned her pants and took them off.

“Baby there is a condom in the back pocket of my jeans can you bring it to daddy?” she got up from his lap and bend down to get the condom. Michael couldn’t resist it and spanked her ass. She moaned from the pleasure, turning Michael on.

“You like it when daddy spanks you baby?”

“Yes daddy please spank me again.”

“I will baby girl but all i want right now is your sweet pussy wrapped around my cock. Come here.” He grabbed the condom from her hand and quickly put it on.

“C'mon princess ride daddy’s cock. Show him how much of a big girl you are.” Y/N positioned herself on Michael’s cock and slowly slide down. They both moaned in bliss.

“Harder babygirl. Make daddy proud.” Michael couldn’t take it anymore. Hearing her moans and whimpers were driving him crazy. He needed to have his way with her. He needed to devour her. He spanked her and said “Lay down baby.”

Y/N got up from his lap and laid down on the couch. After teasing her folds for a bit, Michael positioned himself at her entrance and quickly thrusted in. She felt so good wrapped around his cock and without realising he started ramming into her. He was fucking her so good. Y/N could feel a knot forming in her stomach and the aching feeling around her pussy. She reached down to rub her clit but Michael held her hands over her head.

“I know you’re close me too baby. Cum for me, cum for daddy Y/N.”

Y/N let out a loud moan and came around Michael’s cock. Feeling her pussy clench around his cock drive Michael over the edge.

He reached for the blanket on the floor and put it over Y/N. He got up and walked towards kitchen to get rid of the condom when he suddenly turned around and said, “I knew you had a crush on me. I think you’re cute.”

Parchment // Slytherin Yoongi x Ravenclaw Reader

he-men-ah asked:
Hi~ hi~ Even though it’s almost 1 am and I should be sleeping 😅 I was scrolling along and saw the post you reblogged with the members in their hogwarts house and I got an scenario idea~ Can you write scenario with Slytherin Yoongi and the reader in Ravenclaw pleeease~??? //Totally not asking specifically because I’m a Ravenclaw psshhhh no way~ 😂😅 Lmao~ Thanks ♡♡♡♡♡

I got sooooo carried away with this one because I freaking LOVED writing it. Honestly, this mash-up was so funnnn ♡ It ended up super long haha so sorry about that. I JUST GOT A TAD EXCITED. It also gets a teensy bit smutty at one point but dw it’s not much. But this was so fun!! I hope you like it!!

Also, I’m gonna dedicate this one to not only you, but also my girl Madelyn of @jinssmile​ because it was her birthday last week and she’s a Yoongi fan too so YO HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADELYN. ENJOY.

Genre: Fluff, semi-smut, Harry Potter AU
Slytherin Yoongi x Ravenclaw Reader
Length: 8.1k

DISCLAIMER: I don’t own Harry Potter. None of the settings are mine and all belong to JK Rowling. Gotta say it.


You smoothed down your robes, watching the countryside zip past the small windows of the Hogwarts Express. You were only 11 years old, excited and feeling prepared for your first year at the amazing “school of witchcraft and wizardry”. It had been a dream come true when your letter had arrived. Your parents were just regular people, or “muggles” as all the other witches and wizards called them, so they had thought that the letter was a prank or something when you’d first received it. But as you’d pulled out the piece of parchment and read what was written in the curly green inked handwriting, you knew that it was no joke. It felt too right and explained too much.

Being Muggleborn, you knew absolutely no one on this train. It was the one thing you were worried about at this school. You knew that you would be fine with keeping your grades up, and you weren’t even scared of getting lost, but you’d only found out you were a witch less than two months ago. How were you going to fit in here? The others would’ve surely been raised to expect a life at this school since they were tiny, so would they really accept someone as clueless as you? You’d read up on as much as you could about the school and about magic before you came here so you hoped that you knew enough to at least appear like you were well-versed in all things magical.

Despite all of this you were determined to approach this new experience with zero concerns. You were confident it would turn out okay, so you decided to focus on how amazing all this was. You couldn’t wait to get there, but there was still a long way to go before you reached Hogwarts – you’d really only just left the station. You were fairly sure that you were allowed to have stayed in your normal clothing for a while longer but you were too excited to put on your new robes to wait. You eyed the logo on the front of your robes happily, a small smile appearing on your lips. You were really going. It wasn’t all some crazy dream.

The doors to your carriage opened suddenly and you jumped, looking up to see who it was. There was an Asian boy standing in the opening, a lazy smile on his face. From this distance both his hair and his eyes looked jet black, even darker than his robes. His skin looked white as sugar in stark contrast to the rest of these dark colours. He looked almost like some kind of demon, but you couldn’t recall ever reading about them in any of your textbooks. You made a mental note to look that up once you reached the school and had access to the library. You saw that under his robes his body was slim but at this young age there was still a little leftover baby fat in his cheeks, making him look far less intimidating than you’d originally thought. Those black eyes watched you from where he stood, one hand still resting on the door to the carriage.

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Patater Week - Day 2

Feb. 7- Proposal/Wedding Day/Wedding Night (1.5K)

“I’m nervous,” Kent says.

“Change your mind?” Alexei teases, only feeling a tiny bit worried. He doesn’t think Kent will actually bail on him, now that they’re both in their suits and the hall is surely packed with their families and teammates. Bittle would cry if anything happened, Alexei thinks. And then skin both of them alive.

But then again, Alexei did see Runaway Bride twice with Snowy, when he was first learning English and someone had the brilliant idea that the best way to learn is to watch all the classic romcoms. Snowy, it turns out, is a big fan of Richard Gere. Kent doesn’t look like he’s ready to bolt, but he did seem skittish, and in the movie, Julia Roberts had been very skittish.

“No, never,” Kent says, taking Alexei’s hands and rubbing his thumb over Alexei’s palms. His hair is already a little mussed, the untamable cowlick threatening to pop back up. “Not about you. I know I’m an ass about a lot of things, but you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“Good to know,” Alexei says, letting out a breath of relief. “You tell me now, then what you say for vows?”

“Oh, God,” Kent laughs nervously. “Oh man. That’s—that’s the thing. The vows. In front of a bunch of people. I could probably do it. Maybe. You wouldn’t happen to be carrying Xanax on you?” He chuckles and scratches the back of his neck, but his jaw drops when he sees Alexei rummage in his pockets. “Wait, I’m just joking. I don’t actually—what the hell is that?”

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Ten Years (Part 11)

Summary: AU. When a major account is on the line at work, reader is forced to revisit some old connections at her ten year high school reunion for a chance at success. Will she let the past consume her, or will she see the future in her grasp?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 2,876

Warnings: language, fluff, confrontation

A/N: Tags are closed. I originally had something completely different written, but it no longer felt like it fit with the narrative here, so I rewrote it. I accidentally increased the amount of parts needed for this story, too. I don’t really know how I feel about it, but I feel like it was necessary. Please don’t hate me, haha. BTW - Thank you so much for the sweet messages, they are simultaneously slaying me and getting me through the day.

Part: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13

Originally posted by theimpossibleg1rl

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Muchy’s Top Best Overwatch fics

I said I’d do it, so I’m doing it: Recs for the best Overwatch fics I’ve ever read, in no particular order of importance. 

[[In the Bones of Our Beast]]

Salazar101

Summary:

Junkrat slips into the Omnium and finds treasure, he doesn’t know what it is but other people seem to know, and they want it. Bad. Bad enough to hire famed enforcer Roadhog to drag him in, kicking and screaming.

Relationship/s: Junkrat/Roadhog

What I enjoyed about the fic: 

Amazingly written outback adventures with good relationship development with trash mouse and street pig, with an actual treasure that makes sense, as opposed to the mysterious but undefined treasure in canon and other fics. 

-

[[Koraha]]

debascas

Summary:

The feeling started when they reached the edge of civilization.

Junkrat wasn’t familiar with the twisting sensation in his stomach, the constriction of his chest, and the tingling of his fingers when he held onto the belt of the man driving the motor bike. He knew it wasn’t fear, or anxiety, as he often did experience. It wasn’t the thrill and delight he feels when he blows something or someone up.

This kind of feeling was… Nice. Warm. Nauseating. All at the same time. It grew more sure as the bike accelerated and he held on tighter, the barren landscape blurring passed them, the dust and wind blowing through his singed hair, the roar of the engine ringing in his ears. He tried to brush it off. He tried to forget about it.

Business, it’s only business, he reminded himself. Nothing more. Never will be.

Oh, how he tried.

Relationship/s: Junkrat/Roadhog

What I enjoyed about the fic:

Another well-written Outback adventure story, just fantastically written, engaging, with good character development between our favorite trash folk. 

[STILL INCOMPLETE]

-

[[Bad Sun]]

albion

Summary:

When Blackwatch agent Jesse McCree is sent to kill a mysterious assassin known only as DRAGONSTRIKE, there are a few things he expects to occur.

Falling in love isn’t one of them.

Relationships: Mccree and Reyes, Jesse Mccree/Hanzo Shimada

What I enjoyed about the fic: 

The comparison of Reyes to the chessboard black Queen, as opposed to King, with Jack as King and Mccree as Knight. The exciting encounters between Hanzo and Mccree are also appealing, but the chess scene stands out, as well as the relationship between Reyes and Mccree in Blackwatch days. 

[STILL INCOMPLETE]

[[Watching You Run Into the High Noon Sun]]

AsheRhyder

Summary:

Gabriel Reyes taught McCree everything he knows - not to shoot and kill, but how to survive by more than luck and aim.

McCree learns something else as Overwatch falls, fades, and then rises again: in this life, everyone leaves him behind.

He won’t watch it happen again.

Relationships: Mccree and Reyes, Jesse Mccree/Hanzo Shimada

What I enjoyed about the fic:

You will see a ton of AsheRhyder fic in here, just a heads up. They’re my favorite Overwatch fic writer of all time, and I will trust literally anything they come out with. And it began with this fic.

What I loved most about it was ridiculously, canonically competent Mccree. So many fics fail to think past the Cowboy and fail to maximize the potential of what it meant to be a Blackwatch, former gang member prime Black Ops agent, but this fic hit the mark with a Mccree that isn’t defined by his cowboy hat and boots, but not removed from the persona either. 

Also the relationship between Hanzo and Jesse here is very subdued compared to other fics, but beautifully done. For Mccree lovers who enjoy character studies, and anybody who loves good fic, this is the fic for you. Definitely in my top 5 best. 

-

[[Blue Roses and Salted Caramel]]

AsheRhyder

Summary:

Hanzo hated Valentine’s Day and everything that went with it. This got exceptionally awkward for a man whose courier service saw business triple in the lead up to February 14th.

A series of ‘special deliveries’ between Mr. Jack Morrison and Mr. Gabriel Reyes drew his attention. Initially, it was because he wasn’t sure if it was the world’s most polite form of hate mail or the world’s most awkward flirting…

But then there was something about Mr. Reyes’ son, Jesse, that kept him coming back…

Relationship/s: Jack Morrison/Gabriel Reyes, Jesse Mccree/Hanzo Shimada

What I enjoyed about the fic:

Look, it’s Asherhyder again, haha. Though I should note that while I’d decided Asherhyder was my favorite writer in OW, I had no idea this was written by them until after I finished it (because I do not pay attention and didn’t notice the author name lmao)

I just could NOT STOP SMILING AND GIGGLING throughout this entire fic. It’s so fluff it’ll rot your teeth off, it made my pores clear, my crops flourish, I cried tears of healing as I read this fic. 

-

[[Cast a Long, Dark Shadow]]

AsheRhyder

Summary:

Jack will never forgive himself for not noticing it the first time a prisoner dies while in the new Overwatch’s custody. He knows the signs better than anyone alive: Gabriel taught him how to see the invisible fingerprints Blackwatch left behind.

But someone is cutting off his access to the old Blackwatch records, and to manage that, there needs to be an active commander in the field…

Relationship/s: Jack Morrison/Gabriel Reyes

What I enjoyed about the fic:

Asherhyder again? Listen… you gotta read everything this person has written. Do it. Right now. 

This one may actually be my favorite of the lot, at least firmly in the Top 3. Short, but fantastic and poignant in less than 3000 words. Another amazing character study. Read it right now immediately, it won’t take you long. 

-

[[His Master]]

Balenae

Summary:

Master Genji teaches his student Zenyatta at Shambali Temple in Nepal.

And yet…

And yet.

Relationship/s: Genji Shimada/Tekhartha Zenyatta

What I enjoyed about the fic:

Just LOOK AT THAT SUMMARY AND TELL ME YOU’RE NOT INTRIGUED. A role reversal fic–or is it? One of the more heartrending fics on this list, and absolutely beautiful. In that space between sad and happy-poignant. You won’t regret reading it.



Side note: in case y’all think their name sounds familiar, yes, that is the same Asherhyder who created the Roommates webcomic on deviantart. A quality writer/artist who does quality work all around. Blessed is the Overwatch fandom for having them. 

Side note 2: there’s a fic series I forgot the name of, but I’m gonna add it to the list later. I’ll also be adding fics that I find striking as I go along. I tend to favor McHanzo, Reaper76, Genyatta and Roadrat, so if you think there’s a fic that should be on this list that isn’t, this is basically just a reflection of my fic reading preferences. 

Nct as Vampires

Request: Hi! Could you do an NCT Vampire au? Like how each of the members would be as a vampire? Thank you! :) I hope I requested correctly

A/N: i was actually thinking of writing a single post for each member but it’d be too many so here’s only a brief summary !! if you want me to emphasise on a specific member please do request again !

Assume that only you know about their identity and they promised not to hurt you as long as you don’t tell anyone else ,, and also you live together with them

Taeil:

  • really chill about his identity
  • like when you first told him you knew , all he did was get shocked and asked how you knew , then went back to being normal
  • acts more like a human than a vampire tbh
  • you don’t even know how he survives because you never actually saw him eat/suck ( is this even right it sounds wrong omg ) any other living things before for their blood
  • and when you ask him ,
  • he simply replies with a “ secrets ”
  • turns out he’s been drinking blood he stole from clueless vampire WinWin’s bottle/jar since they stay in the same room

Hansol:

  • he’s so quiet and mysterious it’s creepy
  • like you don’t know when he’d do something dangerous and sudden
  • so you lowkey stayed away from him even after he promised not to hurt you
  • but then you realised he’s an actual softie
  • because you saw him crying over an anime once
  • yes vampires need entertainment too
  • so you start opening up to him
  • and he shares with you about his family and ancestors
  • like how great of vampires they were
  • when he goes out to hunt at night though ,
  • he becomes really serious and you lowkey got scared once because he came back home with blood all around his mouth
  • then he smiles at you innocently and blankly
  • and you can’t help but return a fake smile like hansol you’re scaring me get away and wash up first

Johnny:

  • okay he likes teasing you A LOT
  • okay maybe more of threatening , not teasing
  • like one time you were too lazy to cook lunch for him ,
  • he got super close to you and whispered sarcastically like “ i can’t guarantee you’d still be able to stay up till dinner tonight though ”
  • and he shows his fangs too like stop johnny what are you doing
  • so you were left with no choice but to cook for him
  • he’s such a flirty vampire i cant even
  • like he got you a black dress and cap one day
  • and when you asked him why ,
  • he was like “ you should know we vampires can’t be exposed to sunlight ,, but your beauty and smile’s shining brighter than it so i gotta cover you up ”
  • go away johnny ew
  • kidding he’s so hot tbh

Taeyong:

  • really particular about how he looks and acts
  • like he’s really ‘elegant’ as a vampire (?) ( does this even make sense omg )
  • like his cape must be washed and ironed out properly every day before night falls
  • and he HAS to do it himself
  • one time you helped him wash and clean it ,
  • he got so pissed he didn’t come back for two nights
  • turns out he was living in some kind of abandoned house as a bat
  • and he couldn’t stand the dust so he had no choice but to come back
  • he sometimes forgets that you’re human so he shares with you on stories of all the people he’s eaten
  • and when you’re like “ taeyong that’s too much detail … ”
  • he gets all jumpy like , “ oh shit i forgot , i’m sorry ”
  • “ i forgot i got too caught up ”
  • but he doesn’t really seem different from a human being so you’re not that much bothered by him

Yuta:

  • okay here we have another flirty vampire
  • like really really flirty
  • like one moment you’d just be there watching television ,
  • then a pair of hands wraps tightly around your hips
  • “ want me to turn you into one too ? ”
  • “ no wth yuta what are you doing ”
  • “ couldn’t resist you ”
  • “ stop yuta , hands off ”
  • “ who are you to tell me what to do , i have the powers here ”
  • “ yeah sure if you don’t let go i’ll move out rn ”
  • then he lets go right away and pouts like a small kid
  • he’s really lazy and afraid to go out under the sun so he stays at home like 24/7
  • and he clings onto you like a leech
  • disturbing and annoying you as a form of entertainment

Kun:

  • he’s such an angel though
  • but you didn’t knew he was a vampire until like 1 month of staying together
  • because you always wondered why he went out and came home so late in the night
  • until you saw him drinking some red & thick liquid one day in his cape
  • you almost screamed and fainted
  • but kun was nice enough to help you out , and confessed about his identity after
  • and was like “ don’t worry , i won’t hurt you , you’re too beautiful ”
  • he didn’t even tell you not to spread it , as he trusts that you will keep it a secret
  • so sweet tbh
  • smh why were you born as a vampire not an angel kun

Doyoung:

  • always shookt and worried that his identity might get revealed
  • so everytime you come home , the first thing he asks you is
  • “ did you tell anyone ? ”
  • “ doyoung of course not they’d think im crazy ”
  • “ are you sure ? ”
  • “ yes , i promise ”
  • then he goes back to acting all confident and laidback like
  • “ haha what’s there to be afraid of ”
  • then he turns into a bat and follows you around the next day to spy on you
  • and he thought you wouldn’t notice but in fact he’s so obvious so you just let him be

Ten:

  • always curious about the ‘humans’ like ,
  • “ wow Y/N how does it feel to die ? ”
  • “ do i look like i’ve died before , ten ? ”
  • “ hehe idk , im just curious , i’ve been living for like 127 this is not intentional years now ”
  • “ you’re so old ”
  • “ but i’m still cute right ?? ”
  • and he gives you a cute and innocent smile
  • you wonder if he’s even a vampire
  • but when he gets ready to go out at night he always has this smirk on his face
  • and he’d have eye contact with you before he flies off
  • so rude but you gotta admit he looks good

Jaehyun:

  • like taeil he’s pretty chill about his identity
  • his naturally white and fair skin caught your attention first
  • then he was always hiding in the room first thing in the morning , saying that he had to take his ’ daily medicine ’
  • turns out it was small cups of blood when you went to check
  • so when you first asked him he was just like
  • “ since i trust you , yeah i’m one ”
  • then he flashed his sharp fangs infront of you
  • and when he saw your shocked expression he’d laugh to himself , his cute and smol dimples coming back
  • he actually takes care of you instead , and protects you from other vampires/creatures from attacking

WinWin:

  • he’s such a soft person you couldn’t believe it when he told you he was a vampire
  • and he casually mentioned it to you during a conversation
  • you were shookt for days
  • “ why are you always so tired in the day ”
  • “ i don’t sleep at night ”
  • “ why ? ”
  • “ we are more active in the dark ”
  • “ ‘we’ ? ”
  • “ vampires .. ”
  • he’s cute and innocent most of the time
  • but when night time falls he gets really serious and doesn’t come back quickly ,
  • because he has to find the perfect type and taste of blood which suits him

The minors are all half-vampires instead of ‘full’ ones

Mark:

  • he’s so clueless and adorable he often asks you vampire related questions that you cant even answer , like
  • “ why do we live forever ? will we never die ? wow that’s cool ”
  • “ mark i dont know .. ”
  • “ how am i supposed to take blood out of someone , won’t it hurt them ? ”
  • “ mark i’m not a vampire idk anything ”
  • “ oh … sorry ”
  • he’s so polite and nice he almost starved and fainted because he couldn’t bear to hurt anyone for blood
  • so you had no choice but to donate your own blood
  • which also refused to drink ,
  • but you forced it down his throat , so now active mark is back again

Renjun:

  • another literal angel why
  • he tries his best to sustain his hunger by only eating food
  • but part of him still feels drained because he’s half-vampire after all , he needs blood
  • so he tried drinking his own one ,
  • but it made him even sicker
  • so you had to ask for vampire taeyong’s help because he always had spare bottles of blood
  • just like that you lectured renjun on keeping his body healthy and fit
  • and he was like “ sure … but one person that i’d never ever eat is you , even if im dying ”
  • go reborn as an angel with kun please

Jeno:

  • he’s always smiling and cheerful , the thought of him being a vampire never once crossed your mind
  • but when he told you that he’s only half ,
  • you still got really shocked and speechless ,
  • and as soon as he noticed he promised not to hurt you
  • he likes showing you baby photos of himself , the growing process of his small fangs ,
  • and the way he’d always smile brightly
  • he likes going on walks with you but he always prepares a cap and a pair of jacket to cover himself , if he gets exposed to the sun too much

Haechan:

  • such a prankster i cant even
  • he’d offer to pour you a cup of water ,
  • then when he comes out with two cups filled with red liquid you’re like ,
  • “ this better not be blood haechan- ”
  • “ it is ”
  • “ what why ”
  • “ try it , it’s really good ”
  • “ no donghyuck i cant do this ”
  • “ shut up and drink it ”
  • and after a few minutes of arguing ,
  • “ it’s only some cranberry juice ”
  • and he also likes joking about turning you into a vampire too
  • and would use it as an advantage to call you to help him do things
  • “ help me wash my clothes … if not i might hurt you , idk ”

Jaemin:

  • a mixture of haechan + winwin
  • one moment he’d be all soft and positive ,
  • the other he’s scaring you with his fangs and blood
  • but he knows when to stop and not scare you too much
  • he’s also pretty flirty and smooth like
  • “ if you were a blood type you’d be my favourite ”
  • “ jaemin that’s not cool , stop ”
  • “ okay fine you’re my favourite human ”

Chenle:

  • he’s so happy and loud you didn’t think he was a vampire
  • and his looks did not help too , as he looked so cute and adorable to you
  • he slightly teases and joke with you
  • especially when he reminds you of the face you made when he first told you
  • your mouth and eyes were wide open and no words were said
  • he doesn’t really need that much blood so he acts just like a normal human being ,
  • only sometimes when you notice him getting a bit tired ,
  • you’d ask him to go eat/replenish on his blood intake and listens to you without fail

Jisung:

  • like chenle , this baby is still in the process of developing the vampire characteristics ,
  • so his fangs are still pretty short and he can perform perfectly well even without the intake of blood & under sunlight
  • so you had absolutely no idea he was one
  • until he accidentally told you while y'all were talking
  • and he got so flustered and worried after he realised his confession , he couldn’t sleep peacefully that night
  • but as soon as you told him you didn’t mind and would not spread it ,
  • he became to soften up and share more stories of his family to you
Recommended Reads of 2016

(in which I realize how horrible I am at describing books)

As 2016 draws to a close, I decided to make a list of ten of my favorite books I read this year (not necessarily books published in 2016 though).  I hope you all appreciate this, and I’d love to know what books you loved this year as well!

In no particular order:

1. The Start of Me and You by Emery Lord: This was one of the first books I read this year, and it was so adorable I just had to put it on this list.  It’s about a girl whose first and only boyfriend died, so she is now living her life with a lot more caution.  Basically, it just chronicles how she copes with this and lives her life (I’m so sorry that was a horrible synopsis haha).   By no means was the writing beautiful, and there were plenty of cringe-worthy moments, but it was just a nice and (mostly) fluffy read.  All the references to literature (specifically to Pride and Prejudice) made my nerdy heart happy.  Also, I am such a sucker for a cute nerdy guy (both in books and real life, haha–honestly, if you know of a good book with this kind of guy, let me know) so I understandably loved Max.

2. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen: The Start of Me and You was actually what convinced me to finally read this classic, and boy am I glad I did!!! Honestly, I’m so obsessed with this story (which I don’t think I need to summarize).  Like, this obsession is unhealthy.  I’ve only read the book once, but I’ve watched the miniseries like three times this year and the movie (from 2005, obviously) probably (and I am not even kidding) 20 or 30 times this year.  Keira Knightley and Matthew MacFadyen (if you’re as in love with him as I am, you HAVE to listen to him reading some of Pride and Prejudice – I want him to narrate my life omg) are literally my faves fajkldjgaoi I AM OBSESSED AAH.  But I digress, because this is about books.  Basically I love it.

3. First & Then by Emma Mills: Okay so this is a modern retelling of Pride and Prejudice (are you noticing a theme?? – I could literally read/watch nothing but P&P adaptations for the rest of my life and be perfectly content).  As the blurb on Goodreads said, it’s like Pride and Prejudice meets Friday Night Lights.  Basically, it follows this girl named Devon and the football star, Ezra.  I’m so obsessed that I completely ignored my complete and utter abomination for all sports in order to enjoy the P&P aspect and it was so cute I finished it in less than a day.  

4. Winter by Marissa Meyer: I loved the entire Lunar Chronicles series, but this one was my favorite.  Basically, the series is a sort of sci-fi/dystopian fairy tale retelling with cyborgs and space travel and I really enjoyed it .  Also, the cover??? Amazing.

5. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury: This is a well-known classic, so I’ll spare you the details, but it was just so good (and it’s nice and short if that’s something that interests you) and so scarily accurate for a dystopian novel.

6. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee: Again, a well-known classic about racism and basic human morality in a southern town during the Great Depression.  I have nothing to say that you haven’t heard before, so I’ll just say: it was absolutely wonderful.

7. Paperweight by Meg Haston: I want to preface this by saying it heavily discusses eating disorders, so that is something to be mindful of. It was such a raw and captivating story and I felt it handled the topic well.  I really felt for the characters.  The story was sad and disheartening (an intrinsic quality when it comes to mental illness) but I just felt Haston did a really amazing job with it.

8. Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon: This book is about a girl with an illness so severe she can’t leave her own home.  It follows her life as she becomes interested in her new neighbor (I am blowing myself away with my horrible synopses hahaha - if you really want to know, click the book titles to go to their respective Goodreads pages).  It was a really interesting story that I flew right through.

9. The Sun is Also a Star by Nicola Yoon: I know I’ve mentioned this one before, but I’ll do it again.  It’s about a Jamaican girl whose family is about to be deported and a Korean boy who doesn’t want to follow the plan his parents have set out for them.  They spend a day together in New York City and it’s pretty great.  I loved the little in-between perspectives we got and the blend of science and romance/fate/destiny kind of stuff.  I loved it!!

10. The Memory of Light by Francisco X. Stork: This is another book about mental illness – specifically depression, suicidal thoughts, and schizophrenia.  It’s about a girl who, after attempting suicide, gets to know three other kids with problems like hers.  It didn’t romanticize mental illness or sugarcoat anything, and it made me cry (and I don’t cry often at books) but it was a really captivating story.  

There you have it, folks! My top ten from 2016.  I sincerely wish you all a wonderful 2017 filled with happiness, love, and new memories!!! I love you all! 

The Sleepy Scholar

Pairing: Lafayette x Reader

Words: 2.1k+

Prompt: College AU + Library AU

A/N: This is my AU day imagine for the @hamwriters Write-A-Thon! I’m excited to get this out because I had this finished for like 2 weeks or so now haha. Special thanks to @helplesslylins and @secretschuylersister for proofreading and pushing me to do this! I love you both immensely <3 Enjoy!

P.S. Y/F/I means your first initial!

Originally posted by jamiiton


This all started a week ago. You were doing your typical 11-3AM shift at the campus library. Many people would shy away from the graveyard shift but it was your favorite because it was quiet and no one was typically at the 24/7 library past 2 am so you would binge TV shows or read one of the many books that surrounded you. Plus, your classes were in the afternoon so it was most convenient for you. However this week, there was one lone student that would stay at the same table, nose in his book as he mumbled words until he fell asleep at the desk every night without fail. It was only the 3rd week of school and already some poor soul was in the library until ungodly hours. You couldn’t help but feel bad for the mysterious man with the bun, every time you went to clock out he was face down on the desk, using his arms as a makeshift pillow. By the eighth consecutive night of the stranger’s appearance, you couldn’t keep watching as he wasted his life away. So, that night when you clocked out you brought a water bottle, the PB&J sandwich you never opened, and a blanket you kept in the break room with you on your way out. You delicately placed the blanket over his sleeping form and set the sandwich and water bottle in front of him, along with a short message on a Post-it note.

“Take a break! -Y/F/I”

You took a closer glance at him, mystery man was actually really cute when he was asleep. Before he could catch you staring, you left the library; giving a quick wave to Claudia as she clocked in to take over the information desk. You were leaving Pre-Calculus the next morning when you got a text from Claudia.

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Word for Word (M)

Originally posted by jeonbase

“Less talking. More fucking. Yeah?”

Part 1 | Part 2

3.4k, smut, jungkook/reader, friends with benefits au (+ college + fuckboy)


Jeon Jungkook is a fuckboy through and through. If you look at all his social media photos, all you see are countless images of him sandwiched between two girls, his muscular arms wrapped around their shoulders. Two different girls in each picture, never the same. Most of the photos are dark, dimly lit party scenes with the flash in their eyes, but sometimes there are filter-saturated beach pictures in which Jungkook’s shirtless and hugging girls in bikinis.

(Quite frankly, at times you weren’t really sure who to be jealous of: Jungkook or the girls. Both looked really fucking good. But it’s not like you were really Instagram stalking him and actually cared about his pictures or anything. Totally not.)

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anonymous asked:

I'm so glad Kirishima is getting so much spotlight, he really deserves it!!!! And it looks like hes gonna get more, since hes in the main group along with Deku, Uraraka and Tsuyu. I;m so hyped!!!

Honestly!!!!!!!!!!! That’s one interesting group tbh, Kirishima and Tsuyu’s interactions are always incredibly adorable to watch and seeing Kirishima interact for so long with pure and good people is gonna be hard on my heart (I mean, you know I’m 100% a bakusquad fan but they’re all at least in part assholes and Kiri fits with them just right, he can be just like Sero and Kaminari and I love it, but then his interactions with Amajiki have been so pure can you imagine an arc filled with that I’m already crying)

I just hope my other faves won’t completely disappear through this arc haha sigh

Anon said: So which Kacchan quote do you like best “Die your bacteria fucks, dieee!” or “BRING YOUR DAMN TRASH TO ME”?

LMAO SORRY ANON BUT MY FAVE GOTTA BE

WHAT A GODDAMN DISASTER THIS BOY IS

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