i actually have a lot of jason feelings

Follow your Heart

Characters: Dean Winchester, Mary Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Y/N (Reader), John Winchester (mentioned), Bobby Singer (mentioned), Amara (briefly mentioned), Lisa Braeden (briefly mentioned), Ben Braeden (briefly mentioned), Cassie (briefly mentioned)

Pairing: Dean x reader

Warnings: Hunting injury (brief), Dean’s self-loathing, mention of character deaths (John and Bobby- as in canon), SPN feels (lots of canon used, with a small divergence to fit in my reader)

Wordcount: 6100ish (I swear I have no idea how this happened!!)

A/N: This is written for @i-like-your-assbutt’s Jason Manns “Covers with Friends” writing challenge. My prompt song was Simple Man - I drew inspiration from the lyrics more than I actually used them in the fic, but a line or two got stolen and squeezed in there.

Thanks to my sweet sassy sis Rach aka @mysupernaturalfics for helping me flush out the plot and to my Erin aka @blackthite7 for being the amazing beta that she is. Love you girls.

“CAAAAAAS!” Mary’s heart clenched as she heard the desperation and grief in her oldest son’s voice. She dropped the book she had been holding and rushed through the library to the war room, with Cas close behind her as he appeared from the hall.

She hated herself for being relieved that her son’s looked relatively unharmed. Dean had some cuts and bruises while  Sam had clearly taken a blow to the head, but they were fine. Y/N, on the other hand, didn’t seem fine.

Mary watched her son’s lower Y/N to the floor. Sam stepped away to give Cas room, but Dean didn’t move from her side. Even from a few feet away, Mary could see the tears in his eyes. Never in the short time she had known him had she seen her oldest like this. Like a small broken boy, and she wanted nothing more than to hold him. Sam placed a calming hand on her arm and gently shook his head when she looked up at him.

The distance between her and her first born in that moment were killing her, but Sam knew him better. Mary trusted her youngest to know what was best.

Dean didn’t take his eyes off of her. His hand gently pushed her hair out of her face, and he let it rest on her neck.

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okay let me tell you about chris chow’s dads okay

jason chow lived in california his whole life and knew from age seven when he wanted to kiss his best friend james on the mouth that he was gay. he left home at seventeen and travelled all the way across the fucking country to go to Samwell university, the most inclusive school he could find, and it also had a great hockey program. jason was so excited… until he actually got to the locker room at faber and it suddenly felt like every other locker room he’d ever been in.

everyone seemed to sense that he was different (he was the only one who was chinese, he was the only one from the west coast, and he thought that everyone sensed that he was gay which riled him up more than he wanted to admit) so he didn’t come out. he stayed in the closet and tried to make friends and succeeded, for the most part.

his best friend was his defensive partner, shane miles- known as smiles. smiles was jason’s best friend and he was just so happy, so upbeat and grinning all the time. he made jason feel good and, soon, jason found himself falling in love. because of which, he freaked the fuck out and went and avoided smiles for the next two weeks. smiles, understandably, was not happy that his best friend just up and left him.

so he showed up at jason’s dorm banging on the door and yelling “come on sunny let me in!” (sunny and smiles, a match made in heaven tbh) and finally finally sunny let him in and they sat together on jason’s bed, both of them confused and sad and messy.

then, very quietly, jason said, “i’m gay” hoping beyond hope that smiles wouldn’t care. jason didn’t think he would, but he could never be sure. his grandfather on his dad’s side wouldn’t even talk to him anymore after he came out (fortunately, the rest of his family was very supportive)

smiles smiled and turned to jason and said, “what a coincidence. me too.”

smiles was the first other-gay person jason had ever met. he didn’t know how to react. so he suggested that they go get some coffee to cool down from the emotional wishy-washiness of it all (it seemed nonchalant, but jason’s heart was racing) and they went over to Annie’s, that new coffee place in town, and talked it all out.

sunny told smiles all about his family back home, how supportive they are and how lucky he is. smiles didn’t have the same news; his mom down in kentucky had found him kissing a boy and his whole family had disowned him. he had already been accepted to samwell, so he just followed through with his original plan, sans-family. it made jason’s heart clench and, even though smiles tried to be casual about it, jason could see that it hurt him. they spent the rest of the day talking, right up until annie’s closed.

it eventually all becomes news of the past and jason and shane spend the next year and a half closer than anyone else on the team. shane comes back to cali with jason every break and jason’s family adopts shane as easy as that. it’s so easy, being friends, best friends, and though jason wants more, he never says anything for fear of ruining what they have.

then, new year’s eve their sophomore year, smiles kisses sunny on the top of sunny’s building, three hours too early because “east coast time is the real time” and jason’s never been happier

(they adopt chowder their senior year, living in an apartment off campus, and they take him to all the practices- the rest of the team basically becomes chowder’s uncles- and chowder learns how to skate at faber. also, chowder’s dads were the original hockey defensive-partner gays- they’re role models for holster and ransom and, when dex and nursey meet Mr. and Mr. Chow (shane didn’t want his family’s name anymore after they got married) the husbands wink significantly at dexnursey as if this means something and dex and nursey spend the whole visit blushing)

sometimes I think about the fact that jason never actually got to mature mentally. I mean,, he died at 15 and then was practically brain dead until he was like 17 or 18 so he couldn’t possibly have actually had the mentality of a 17 year old at that point. it makes me wonder what mentality he has right now i mean does he actually feel 21? or do those missing years have an impact causing him to feel younger?

[ open to: females ] 

“You know, that actually wasn’t half bad I have to say I learned a lot.” Jason had been sceptical about studying with someone else but coming close to final exams he really needed to start doing something. She had offered to help and considering she would be studying too it made sense, he didn’t feel half as stupid that way at least. “I thought I would end up getting distracted or eat my weight in chips”, chuckling he closed his book and leaned back a little, rolling his shoulders and hearing them pop from being hunched for so long. But it was a good feeling, knowing more than he had before he started this whole thing. “Thanks for having patience with me, I know I’m a little…slow on taking in some things”, he admitted sheepishly. 

9

I like to blame most of this issue on leftover pit-inspired craziness on Jason’s part. This is the first time he and Tim meet.  He shows up at Titans Tower when he knows Tim will be mostly alone, so he’s clearly been staking this moment out for a while.  We know from the miniseries Red Hood: The Lost Days that he’s known about Tim for a while, so this isn’t really a surprise.  

Jason is really brutal when it comes to Tim.  He actually says a lot of the things that I think readers feel about Tim; there’s no way he could have possibly figure out Batman’s identity without Bruce knowing about it.  He wants to test Tim’s skill level.

Jason is brutal throughout this confrontation.  He’s violent, obviously, and says some really hurtful things.  Tim, by contrast, actually presents himself well.  He mostly defends against attack, and he doesn’t take any pot shots at Jason. He’s confident in his own abilities, and he’s not afraid to fight back, but he doesn’t feel the need to prove himself the way Jason does.

Also, Jason, you look ridiculous in that Robin costume.  Where the heck did that even come from?

Teen Titans 29

Mona’s Twin.

I know that in 5x25 we saw that Charles was apparently the twin of Jason, however I am stuck between believing and not believing.

I feel that if Charles is the twin, it solves a lot of questions we have had and that means, no more mystery. I feel like PLL is trying to make it look like Charles is a twin, but with no actual conformation of that, we can’t know if he is or not. If you read certain theories, they tell us that one ‘brother’ looked taller than the other. (A reference to ‘Irish Twins’)

We were told there would be twins, but we weren’t told how many twins there could be or the gender.

Is it possible that Mona’s twin killed the real Mona? There was something so off about Blonde Mona that made me wonder. Then I thought back. The person who killed Mona had blonde hair, much like CeCe’s in length and color. In 5x25 we see Blonde Mona, sporting luscious locks that look much the same length and color of CeCe’s/Ali’s. We also saw Mona’s dead body so I don’t understand how she could have been alive in that scene.

I think Mona was planning her death, but Blonde Mona killed her.