hypotheticaltextiles

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Alright, and I’m finally ready for Operation Lesbisnatch! You don’t know what that is? Well, then, go read all about it, I’ll wait. Done? Good. As you see, that right there is a good cause. I am donating psychotoys!

For every $20 towards you stealing the Dykleration of Independence, you can ask me to make you one of these little felt creatures in whatever colours you like (within reason. Like, glittery felt is hard to get) and I will send it your way!

But that’s not all! See that box of craft stuff and chocolate at the bottom? I have several boxes of various sizes. ALL the stuff in the second to last picture went into the closed-box picture, I am good at packing these things. You want one of these, then the amount you pay for it is negotiable because obviously, the more you donate, the bigger the box. Biggest container available is a glass 500ml coffee jar which is a gift in itself and holy moly, you would not BELIEVE how much goes in there.
Also, you get to pick a theme for your box. The one in the picture is a Karkat box, and to give you an idea of pricing, would set you back a measly $15. If I don’t know your fandom? Don’t worry, I’ll research it for you.

So paypal the cash to tattooedbum@gmail.com - we have a dyke in distress to rescue! 

This is what I’ve been working on since May. They have had complete control over all my productive capabilities, I actually did injure myself at least once in their production and I am glad to see the back of them, but by god, I’m proud of them. Especially considering I’d never done anything of the sort before and was mainly making it up as I went along.

Yes, they’re puppets, yes, they’re for The Little Mermaid, but not the Disney version. I saw the dress rehearsal and this is pretty much the Hans Christian Andersen version verbatim, only with more audience participation and amusing dogs.

Basic Sewing Tutorial: What You Need

OK, first of all, I haven’t posted anything this week because I’ve had a ‘orrible cold and I’ve been in bed, sick as a dog. I’m back now though, and here, as promised, is the first of those sewing tutorials - this one isn’t even Sewing 101. Think of it as Sewing 000, this post is the bit where we gather our materials. I promise I won’t make you buy anything expensive. Everybody taking notes? Good.

Ignore all those books telling you you need huge piles of fancy equipment and £50 gold-plated scissors and real emery pincushions. The core equipment list, skimping a little maybe, looks like this.

Keep reading

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Here is my current WIP! I’m going to make a whole bunch of these for next con season. The one at the top is just cut out and only a bit sewn together - when she’s done her salwar khameez will have tons of black and gold embroidery all over, and she’ll get a multi-strand necklace and a fashionable handbag to go with her.

The other one is the one I was working on for most of today - the white square with the flowers is going to become a tote, and in case you can’t read her shirt it says ‘I’m really a mermaid’. She will have a logo of some kind on the sides of her hi-tops but I can’t really put it on till after she’s stuffed, because it will go over the side seam.

I think the next one will be a goth, and obviously I have to do one of me in my yellow coat, and I want to do a Burton (and in fact half the Lost Souls cast) for a laugh, and then I want to do one in Mori style (it’s just so calming and nice) and obviously cyberpunk just must be done…

It’s a good thing felt is plentiful and cheap, is all I’m gonna say.

3

Here is my new Abbey, as promised, in her cozy new chunky cord dressing gown - no slippers just yet - waiting for some decent clothes.

The second picture is the sweater dress in progress, as you can see, I’m making it pretty much entirely in double crochet so it’s making a fairly neat rib pattern, which I’m pleased with. I may embroider a motif on the front, or just leave it be and give her some bright chunky beads to go with. I think she’ll get some lilac leggings to go under it, either way.

Pic three is the fabric for the floaty skirt - the pattern on this is tiny, those diamonds are fingertip-wide, but they’ll look normal-sized on Abbey and the fabric’s light enough to hang beautifully, I think.

PLANZ.

I made this as a present for jumpingjacktrash - or, more accurately, for his psycho vampire character, Jack Saturday, after one of those character Q&A thingies brought up the subject of exactly how Jack was gonna customise his new car.

This bat is smaller than the regulation Psychobat, and has feet, so therefore it is the prototype Minibat.

So be warned. If you get me liking your stuff there may be plushies in your future.

This was actually the prototype for the current Psychowl, and it was originally going to be purple and green - I amassed a considerable amount of funky green and purple quilting cotton and then got hold of this cute strawberry print stuff and used that instead. It has a jingle inside, and a handle for a baby to hang onto.
Yeah, that’s why it’s got felt eyes instead of buttons, it’s a baby’s toy. I do make those occasionally.

Christmas by Me! #4

Let’s get purple. No, seriously, these are just the Purple set.

I was not sure about the colours on this one but someone gave me some compliments on specifically that, so I guess there’s no accounting for taste. Mine, that is.

Red/purple/blue is a colour combo I’ve always liked, and if I had an extra hand I could hold this up a little more and the drop bead on the front would dangle like it should. Instead it is falling to the side and creating a space. But it doesn’t normally.

This is another one that I really wasn’t sure about until it was very nearly done. Cue lots of picking up different beads and holding them up and trying to visualise the finished design - I swear, half my working time is picking beads. The hearts on this are mother-of-pearl, I had a few of these, and also some stars which you have probably seen already.

This one sold pretty quickly - hearts seem to be very popular, I will have to make more of those next year. Green and purple is another favourite colour combination for me. But there are a lot of those in this project, obviously.

This one has one of the best beads in the entire project and I’m sorry you can’t see it better - that enamel cloisonne butterfly in the middle. It’s also got lapis lazuli chips and I was so pleased with it when it was done.

Yes, it sold.

Christmas by Me! #1

I have been making a bunch of embroidered Christmas baubles this year, to sell in the cafe where I hang out a lot of the time. Luckily I photographed most of them before they went and you can see all of them here! Not all at once, though. I wouldn’t do that to you, not as well as subjecting you to my dreadful photography.

Here, this is the first set.

They were loosely made in sets of five and this one was mashed up from two sets that were incomplete before the display deadline - that’s why there’s two missing shapes, which are circle and heart. They were going to be Primaries and Woodland, now this set is Brights.

The entire project basically started with the thought, ‘damn, I have got to use up some of these beads’. This one looked dodgy right up until it was nearly done, which just goes to show you never can tell.

One of the first ones to be finished. You can tell that in person, because it has two free-hanging ribbons instead of a loop.

This one is actually bright scarlet in person.

I really wish I’d had time to finish the forest set. Green and orange as a colour combo is just delightful.

The bells for this came off a skirt I used to own; keep an eye out, there’ll be more. The little round bells on all the other baubles in this set came from a cheap craft kit and as I recall I particularly wanted rid of those.

And tomorrow I will show you more!

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Pretty simple, these. Yes, I was a Kingdom Hearts II fangirl for a short time, and in that time I thought I’d see if I could fit Axel into a cross-stitched keyring. And it turned out I could. I still use this keyring.

This led to my first real commission, by child-of-aros over on DeviantArt, of her character Dagmar Cassidy. Whether c-o-a still uses it, I have no idea.

Today I bought myself something I’ve wanted for a while - a Monster High doll, specifically a VIP Abbey Bominable. I did want the basic Abbey, but apparently they’re virtually impossible to get hold of these days, at least from ordinary shops. Bleh.

The VIP Abbey doesn’t come with a doll stand, but luckily I already had one that I picked up at the flea market - in fact a rather better doll stand than the ones that come with the MH dolls. Mine’s made of metal and adjustable, and it doesn’t tip over under the doll’s weight, which was something I noticed about the Robecca Steam that I bought my niece for Christmas last year.

The main reason I wanted a MH doll (aside from the fact that they’re cool) is so that I can make clothes for it. Maybe one day I can sell MH clothes and accessories online, who knows.

Already made: One comfy dressing gown in chunky pink corduroy for Abbey to wear while she’s waiting for her new wardrobe

Pending: One chunky crochet jumper dress in white cotton yarn (so far one sleeve made)
One pair of pink slippers to match the dressing gown
One long floaty skirt in blue sari cloth with little gold dots and silver trim
One proper ‘ice’ crystal necklace
One beaded belt

I’ve also got a whole load of shower curtain samples so I may make her a raincoat, and some blue bookbinder’s leather which may become either shoes or a waistcoat or something else, we’ll see.

POSSIBILITIES.

There will be photos later, when I’m not so lazy and the light’s better.

Christmas by Me #7

Oh dear, I don’t know what happened with my photography skills on this set, I do apologise. I think maybe it was near closing time and I was being rushed? Possibly. Anyway, I like this set quite a lot.

The Starry Night set. Two of which have sold already.

If I had had two more hematite stars I would have done a different thing with the tassels on this one. It’s not bad as it is but I feel it could be more elegant.

This one has sold and I wish I had a better picture - comes of trusting a tiny screen, I guess.You can see the real silver leaves and the hematite rings - you can’t see that the seed beads at the tips of those pale blue bugles are striped pink and blue and it’s glorious.

This one also sold and I am almost crying that the picture is so bad. There are so many nice beads in this, Swarovski crystals, Czech glass, silver lined seed beads, the works, I was proud of this, and then the only record I have left is this shit. :(

I’m just going to say that the dangle for this is an earring without its finding and leave it at that.

This gets worse and worse. And you know the worst thing? This was one of my favourite sets of the whole lot.

As promised, here is the scarf I made my brother for his birthday! It crocheted up in like five hours, and he doesn’t look very impressed here but he smiled really big and put it on right away. He says it looks like a liquorice all-sort.

Also when I went to buy yarn to complete it I erred on the safe side so I started this project to use up some yarn that I had and now I have twice as much as I started with.

Also my DeviantArt now has a tutorial about how to make it, which is probably badly written, but really this is such an easy project it’s quite hard to get it wrong…

I am crocheting my brother a scarf in black, white and yellow Sirdar Big Softie, one hundred and fifty trebles by, oh, IDK, seven rows at most? on the biggest crochet hook I could find which I don’t know how big that is because it’s an enormous chunky thing from a Tunisian crochet kit I got in last year’s Secret Santa and I think the instructions called it an M or a K. It’s about as fat as my pinkie.

Anyway, I ran out of yarn so I need more, but that’s no biggie, I can get some tomorrow.

I can talk about this here because Boil barely even knows Tumblr exists.

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A design for Greebo and You, from the Discworld books, based on my basic Psychokitty design.

I am not making these anymore - they were popular, but eventually tedious - but You would have been the normal size, which is a bit bigger than a tennis ball. Greebo would have been football-sized, which would possibly mean I’d have had to use fleece, not felt, or he’d have come apart at the seams.