hush that joke is still funny

deal | pt 3 (m)

Originally posted by sugamysavagebaby

summary: the years spent working hard had really paid off and was it so wrong to want to rub that in a few faces? The cliché mean girls that often teased you for not doing anything with your hair or clothing, wouldn’t it be great to show off someone like Jungkook? High school reunion au + ceo!jeon

word count: 3,292

warning: slight voyeurism, usual filth etc

part one | part two

Monday. A fresh start to the week, bringing a close to deadlines as new deals began. The office as always was bustling with life, colleagues sharing mundane details of their past weekend and plans for the next. However, an interesting topic or rather rumour was making it’s way around the office at a frightening speed. You’re preparing your first cup of coffee that morning when you hear it, feminine sniggers to the right of you.

Keep reading

So bad its good: Family edition.
  • <p> <b>Sakura:</b> Alright if I hear one more bad joke in this house--<p/><b>Kizashi:</b> Sakura I am simply your humble father but surely you appreciate the sharp wit of your devoted husband.<p/><b>Naruto:</b> *sighs* She's banned puns from the house. I love your daughter but she is a humor snob.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> It's not about snobbery! It's about my mental health.<p/><b>Kizashi:</b> *shakes head in shock* My daughter how could you ban puns? They're the backbone of tradionalist humor. The founder of our clan used puns to bring laughter and peace to warring states.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Dad, you know, that I know, that you've just made that up. I'm not eight anymore.<p/><b>Naruto:</b> Honorable father in law, allow me the opportunity to inherent your will.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Ok I can see that you two have joined forces in silliness. I'm taking Shinachiku to the park and we'll wait there untill you both get the comedy bug out of your systems.<p/><b>Shinachiku:</b> ......... Mama<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Yes sweetie.<p/><b>Shinachiku:</b> I have a joke<p/><b>Sakura:</b> *Glares at Naruto and Kizashi*<p/><b>Naruto:</b> Sakura it's the humor gene passed down from father to son, he cant help it. It's DNA, its science. You of all people should know that.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Neither genetics or science works like that! Go ahead Shinachiku.<p/><b>Shinachiku:</b> Knock knock.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Who is there?<p/><b>Shinachiku:</b> Needle<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Needle who?<p/><b>Shinachiku:</b> Needle little money to buy some candy *giggles*<p/><b>Sakura:</b> oh my god that was so adorable! Shinachiku when did you get so funny!<p/><b>Shinachiku:</b> *proudly* I dunno<p/><b>Kizashi:</b> I am not surprised, it's in the boy's blood. It's the will of comedy!<p/><b>Naruto:</b> *Sniffs happily* The new generation surpasses the last.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Of course, Shinachiku is cute and silly while you two are just silly. That's why your bad jokes are still banned.<p/><b>Naruto:</b> Her will to comedy is mean<p/><b>Kizashi:</b> She has chosen the path of darkness.<p/><b>Sakura:</b> Hush! Shina has another funny joke to tell his mommy. Go ahead sweetie.<p/></p>

Aldeberan, is a pale rose star marking the right eye of the Bull, “The eye of illumination.” It is the brightest star in the Taurus constellation. 


Do you ever look at someone and think “Holy fuck, they made the stars”?
Her hands touching the heavens,
They reached into the void and made light
And right now, they’re eating your pot noodle,
Laughing at your jokes that really aren’t funny.

When you get lost in darkness and you cry to her,
“I’m awful, I’m worthless, I’m a canister of poison vapours and acid.”
She reminds you that you’re not
And hangs her stars around your neck.
 Her nebula hands swallow yours in peaceful silence
And suddenly your path is lit and chill is hushed away.
You can see the veins of ore that run through your wrist
As you listen to her canary song as if a lullaby. 

Isn’t it amazing how her sky could look at your underground
And witness something worth rooting for?
More amazing still, she’s perched on her ladder
Affixing celestial bodies to the night and saying
 "Who, me?“ As if she’s blind to her own light.
 Here she is sat opposite you in a cafe, or on your sofa,
Shimmering without even realising it.

You’re so lucky to know her,
She who helps you navigate the night
And you repay it with smiles and more bad jokes.
 Hoping that your stability and rocky underground give her shelter.
 Hoping she feels the same safety she gives you.
 All you can do is thank whatever came before this universe,
For tossing you in her direction.
 Because you can’t think of any hands
That would have made a softer landing. 

Luka Rix (jaded-confessions)

warwinterwolf  asked:

Sup :)! I saw your stuckony work (and it's oh so fuckin fab i loved it) Anyway me and my friend @fallenangelcastiel where super pumped up by stuckony avengers academy edition. You if we may suggest a prompt... "Bucky is still strugglin' with his memories even with Steve's and everyone help in the Academy, and sometimes he needs to be left alone so Bucky tends to sneak around at the back of Stark Tower writting songs and singing, cue on Tony loving every minute of it because it helps him (...) concentrate on his work. Iron man doesn’t really want to interrupt Bucky but one day there’s mild explosion and TWS comes up to see what is happening. He and Tony bond over tech and their mutual “Oh god Steve shut up, but also don’t because you have a nice voice I mean what”. Steve starts seeing them hanging around, but he has no idea why he feels like a hydra’s henchman kicked him in the guts, he later determines he is jealous but he isn’t sure of whom? Meanwhile Tony and Bucky enjoy singing Twenty One pilot songs and tinkerin’ with tech and after TWS determines that Steve is acting weird (more weird than usual) and findin out what Cap’s feelings are about. He sets up a surprise DATE! For the three of them. It goes to shit when Red Skull appears to fuck shit up (fuck that angry skeleton btw) and tries to get both Cap and Buck to Hydra (also Iron man gets really beated up by him) but slightly hurt Tony saves the day with science and an epic line like like Surprise bitch, you though you have seen the last of me” rad momentum and gets them back to finish their date. All of them bloody and covered in scratches end up eating giant burgers on the corner store and decide that this seems to be like a great idea on the good run (cue Bucky and Steve kissin’ all that sweet geeky Tony finally)” Sorry if its hella long, Hope this is okay, and long live stuckony and your amazing writting skills in every universe! <3

Oh wow you are so sweet thank you so much. Thanks for the prompt! I have been looking for some AVAC Stuckony to no avail, may as well write it!


James Barnes. That was the guy who had been on the Hydra platform for weeks now, rolling his eyes and shaking his head when he thought no one was watching. As soon as Sharon had figured out who it was, Tony was among the first to find out and the first to help James get back to being Bucky again. Once he actually joined the academy, Tony stepped back a little. Steve was the guy’s best friend, he should be the one helping him, not some random guy who knew how to break a bit of hyper-weak-ass brainwashing. Steve had made his peace with Tony but still wasn’t talking to him as much, avoiding really was the term. So when Tony learned he was helping Bucky with his memories, he guessed the new guy wouldnt be talking to Tony too much either. 

Tony shook his head and tried to focus on his work. His Iron Defenders needed upgrades, so did Rhodey’s suit, hell so did his own suit considering he spent so much time on the joke-suit of the Capbuster. He smiled, still funny though. He was nowhere near in the zone, the zone was a distant memory to him, how the hell was he supposed to focus? He was tempted just to head up to the hot tub when a low, gravely voice and a hushed guitar broke his train of though. 


Steve was great. No really, Steve was amazing at the moment with Bucky. He was helping his with old memories, encouraging him in anyway he could, but even his ‘best friend’ (was he? was this just a ploy from Hydra to ensure compliance?) had little time for his music. He wanted to play sports like the used to, or reminisce about old times, or live in that damn club. So, every now and then, when he could Bucky would sneak behind Stark Tower. Steve hated the building so tended to avoid it on his walks, especially since Tony planted a statue of himself there ( “Cap has a statue! Fair is fair!” He had argued) so he knew he wouldnt be bothered.  He could just sit and play his music, take his mind back into his own hands- not Hydras, not The Red Skulls, and not Steve trying to get his best friend back. He didn’t have to be Bucky or a Soldier, he could just be James.

Keep reading

whatever happens here, kurt/adam, 1100words: Kurt and Adam attend the wedding of a co-worker on Christmas Eve. 

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, KADAM FANS. You guys are all amazing and I love you lots.


“It’s a ’cool toned, pastel themed ceremony’,” Kurt mutters under his breath as they slide into an empty pew. “She’s so pretentious- it’s a winter wedding.”

Keep reading