hunger caterpillar

anonymous asked:

people often talk about how louis has opened up liam and "changed" liam for the best but no one ever talks about what they think liam has done for louis. how has their friendship has effected louis? any thoughts?

WHO ARE THESE ANONS WHO KNOW WHAT MY MOST CURRENT CONVOS WITH PPL HAVE BEEN? AM I IN THE MATRIX? ARE YOU NEO?

do i have thoughts. oH BUDDY. the short answer is yes, but you clearly want the long answer. 

here’s the thing about this: you’re very right, ppl do often talk about how louis opened liam up, and with good reason, but also bc it’s so prominent. it’s so THERE. you literally can see a visual evolution of it like an awkward cuddly hunger caterpillar for love turning into a butterfly of wild and open affection.

louis, is different. but the change, well, the EVOLUTION is there too. it’s quieter, it’s more subtly woven into louis’s fabric the affect that liam had on him through the course of their friendship. i think louis found someone who was willing to share the weight of all this, of all the pressure he put on himself as the oldest and kinda de facto leader, because liam was willing to take it all and i don’t think louis expected that. louis has spoken about how interesting it is for some with his character to be the oldest, be the responsible role model because of his sisters, and i think he was ready to transfer that over in the band. and there was liam, this ridiculously determined kid, who was so ready to do this on his own, ready to then take all the weight of what it meant being successful and keeping the band together and louis didn’t really know how to deal with this kid. who acted like he didn’t need help, which is hilarious bc louis was very similar. he’s was the older one, the one they are supposed to lean on, and he doesn’t need help either. which is why their friendship is such an interesting development in mutual trust and balance.

and i think that’s the key word almost. within liam’s friendship louis found a balance. and i’ll get back to this, but first, he also found some… patience, i guess would the rightest word. he had to shift his way of thinking and approach with liam. it was different for every boy they way they bonded, but i think with louis it required more thought— and by this i mean: being more thoughtful and mindful of how liam was. how liam approached and reacted to things like touch, being the big one. being the most visually present one. louis had to learn to show just the right amount of affection and teasing in the touch lest out donut liam think he wasn’t welcome in louis’s space. the biggest case in point: that interview were liam fiddles with louis’s hair and louis teases him and you can tell louis THINKS they’ve gotten to this point where he can tease with just that bit more of bite and liam will be okay, but. he’s wrong. and liam shirks back and louis literally has a little fit of “I WAS JOKING LIAM. FIDDLE WITH MY HAIR PLS.” and liam giggles bc oh louis was joking. but that’s what i mean. with niall, harry or zayn that moment would have played out v differently. that extra bit of bite would have had them rolling their eyes or poking him or w/e, but that extra bit of bite completely pushes liam back and louis had to learned that. had to learn how tease just the right way and be more mindful. 

and it’s not that louis is thoughtless, bc i think he can be very thoughtful. but he can be brash and quick and biting in the moment and liam works slower than him. so for liam louis slowed a bit down. not much, but he did. i mentioned to zaf, em and chloe the other day that the shift in lilo’s friendship is one that caused liam to be more external and louis more internal, and yeah. if you want one sentence for it to encompass their ridiculously layered relationship that’s a good one. i hope. 

and i think it balanced — see i told you i was getting back to this — something that i’m not sure louis thought to be unbalanced. if you know what i mean. louis tipping almost completely under the idea of being the oldest, the leader, the one taking care of his boys, was dealing with twitter loudly, was getting tired of all the same questions, all the annoying prodding and then comes liam and he’s tugging at half of those responsibilities louis has shoved on himself. he can take care of the boys too, he can be a leader for the band too, he answer some of those questions and take the lead in interviews sometimes when louis is #done. and louis is suddenly realising he’s got a partner in this, someone who’s just taking his hand and taking half the weight (and i completely believe all these boys share the weight of his band 5 ways, but i think within the band itself lllo as self proclaimed leaders also try to sneak some niall, harry or zayn’s stuff on themselves, the doofs.) and doesn’t asks for anything else but for louis to be there for him too. 

(i won’t attribute it all to liam, however, bc i think a lot if it was louis himself growing up. but maybe a little bit of this growing up was: i got to be as wild i wanted to be and liam was there with the water and aspirin in the morning. maybe it’s my turn. to put it in wild child terms. ironically you can even go as far to say: louis grew up to be a bit more like liam, and liam a bit more like louis.)

but yeah, getting back to The Point~ and louis can breathe a bit easier knowing liam is right at his side. louis can focus less on everything he’s not doing, or not doing well, and focus on doing stuff right. i think their friendship helped strengthen louis’s centre, tbh. settled more into himself. he can be as brash as he wants to be but there’s also this knowledge that liam is there, right at his side, someone to tumble around on stage together, someone to listen to his songs, to write with, to do all the dumb stuff with, TO BE THERE. if louis gave liam butterfly wings to cause hurricanes with then i think liam gave louis (be aware i avoided the compass metaphor here bc #treading dangerous waters) someone to pilot the jaeger they walk through that hurricane with. 

i could get soppier but i think that’s enough. i hope i answered at least part of your question to your liking.