humans eat

anonymous asked:

!!!!! But imagine the fun that Steve and Bucky would have with inflatable pool toys. Imagine them helping Tony shop on Amazon for new ones when they break. -WA

Counter Imagine: Imagine that Tony lets them eat human food and then Steve sees the pizza pool float and thrashes so hard in excitement he almost throws Bucky out of the tank. “Pizza float! Pizza float!” Tony buys it, amused, and Steve’s too heavy for it, mostly, but it’s fine; he needs his tail in the water anyway, and Tony thinks it’s hilarious when Steve propels himself around the pool clinging to the pizza.

It’s even more hilarious when he does it in the ocean.

Bucky likes the swan float.

anonymous asked:

I must wonder on how this virus could effect on human souls. Monster took it real bad, I have a knack for wanting the answer for something. Also, A certain man who speaks in hands wishes to know. Please, don't tell Sans I ask. (really love the AU and the characters.)

Azul—The Hunger side effects will affect a Human soul the same way it does a Monster soul. The process is just much, much slower. 

If a Human eats monster flesh, or has a high LV, then they will be more easily affected.

anonymous asked:

m!a: you find a container filled with humans magically has popped up in front of you. normally this would be gross, but suddenly you find yourself craving them. desperately craving them. like youve been starved for years.

What? WHAT what what no no no no no I’m not going to eat humans! I’m not, I’m not–

… I’m- I’m not, I’m really not, I’m.

I’m a monster

8

So anyway here’s a doodle comic I started but just… can’t… finish…

I probably have like a year before this variation of Pink and White Diamond are shot to bits so lemme have some fun.

Humans are Weird: Spices

Alien: Today in my “Human Studies” book, I’m reading about human foods.

Human: Ooh, cool.

Alien: But I’m not sure this is accurate. It says here that humans purposely ingest a plant high in a pain-causing chemical, capsaicin.

Human: Oh, peppers? Yeah. Spicy.

Alien: But why would you want to eat something that causes you pain?

Human: Some people like the burn. I think it causes the same sort of reaction as drinking alcohol…?

Alien: That activity doesn’t make sense to me either. Can we discuss it after?

Human: Sure.

Alien: So, these “peppers.” Do you enjoy eating them?

Human: Me? Well, not by themselves. But I do like somewhat spicy foods. My brother, though, he likes them much hotter. He’s eaten some really spicy peppers, even ate a ghost pepper by itself.

Alien: Ghost pepper.

Human: Yeah, it’s the spiciest natural pepper. His face got pretty red, and he got the hiccups.

Alien: That… doesn’t sound like a healthy reaction.

Human: It just means that it’s a really spicy pepper. I mean, if I ate one of those, it might kill me, but he was fine.

Alien. Why would it kill you?

Human: Too spicy. You have to have a tolerance for capsaicin or it can literally kill you. And the ghost pepper is so hot that to handle it, you gotta wear gloves.

Alien: Your planet has plants that can KILL people, and which you can’t handle directly, and your brother ATE ONE, by ITSELF??

Human: Yeah.

Alien: …

Human: He says that when he gets desensitized to ghost pepper, he wants a Carolina Reaper.

Alien: I’m almost afraid to ask.

Human: …

Alien: What’s a Carolina Reaper?

Human: A pepper scientifically engineered for spiciness. It’s currently the world’s hottest pepper.

Alien: *stares at human in disbelief*

Alien: *stares at human studies book*

Alien: *stares at human again*

Alien: *whispers to self* How… how are humans real?

3

In @crankgameplays‘s Snakepass video he brought up a nightmare he had as a wee boi about a giant snake strangling him. And for some reason I decided to depict the snake back for revenge. I dunno, I’m tired. Noodle attempting to eat a blueberry or something. Always ask first.

The party faced off against Shia Labeouf tonight. Giles got part of her cheek eaten, Dreya had a chunk of shoulder bitten off, and Umong had some arm ripped off then spat out in disgust. They’re all pretty mentally scarred, and Giles learned an important lesson that sometimes humans Eat People and sometimes orcs aren’t the bad guys. Next meeting, we venture into the Underdark. - DM

Source for the sheet

Alien/Human Interactions

-Aliens seeing how many times humans declare war on each other throughout history and thinking that humans enjoy war as some sort of sport or spectacle

-Aliens coming into possession of human sci-fi horror films and being worried that their human companions are afraid of them

-Aliens coming into possession of positive human representations of aliens and forming huge crushes on Mr. Spock and ET

-Aliens first discovering humans through stray TV broadcasts of the Brady Bunch, Grease, and other vintage tv shows. Intergalactic fashion suddenly shifts to favor clothing similar to 50s greaser jackets and sweaters

-Aliens falling in love with human fashion and parading around in poorly applied makeup (the said aliens watched dozens of tutorials on YouTube), bonus points if the alien is traditionally masculine looking. “I look like your human goddess Beyonce and you cannot convince me otherwise, human Steve.”

-Aliens falling in love with human languages and printing human words all over their clothing like Americans do with French words. However, they often mix up the languages by picking and choosing which words they like the best, so the phrases turn out like “C'est good, nyet?”

-Aliens relating more to neurodivergent people because of how their brains work, bonding with humans over different strengths and weaknesses

-Aliens seeing all the ways humans go thrill-seeking (rollercoasters, skydiving, bungee-jumping, water slides) and scolding their humans for putting themselves in danger oN PURPOSE

-Aliens tasting spicy foods for the first time and and scolding their humans for eating FIRE

-Aliens being worried that their human love interests find them unattractive and trying different things to look more human

-Aliens being confused by human daydreaming and infant “pretending”. Why would humans want to be anything else? They are already perfect.

-Aliens having the same weird fantasy of being “abducted” and “probed” by humans that we have of them

-Aliens having weird 70s style videos on “Human Etiquette”, with incredibly inaccurate info on how humans actually act

-Aliens first coming into contact with dogs and animals because we sent those into space first, assuming that humans are the same and attempting to placate them with tummy rubs and rubs behind the ears

anonymous asked:

The game already explained the bathroom thing. Monster food doesn't cause you to expel anything after you eat it, so there was no need for bathrooms.

It’s true that monster food absorbs converts perfectly into energy! This is why there is no need for a single toilet anywhere in Undertale. However, where would a human fit into all this? First, here’s what we know.

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S:
Hmmm… Isn’t human food different from monster food?
It does things like “spoil.”
And when you eat it, it passes all the way through your whole body.
Disgusting.
I’d love to try it sometime. 

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S:
And I’ve heard they have things called bathrooms.

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S (after Undyne battle):
 To a human, monster food would be very interesting.
As soon as you eat it, it converts perfectly into energy.
…that makes me wonder. How do humans do it?
Eat during battle…?
Ice cream in one hand, sword in the other.
That’s the way of the monster warrior…

MONSTER IN GRILLBY’S (after Asriel battle):
Soon, I’ll be able to try some human food…
And then I guess I’ll try a human bathroom, too.

Toby didn’t cover his bases very well though. Despite this monster never hearing of a “bathroom” before, bathrooms are mentioned a few times in Undertale.

NARRATION:
Jerry tells everyone it has to go to the bathroom.

PAPYRUS:
WHOOPSY DOOPSY! I JUST REMEMBERED!
I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!!

ALPHYS:
Now we’re officially friends! Ehehehe!
Heheh…
Heh…
I’m going to the bathroom.

ALPHYS:
I’m going to the bathroom, so I’ll be MIA for a bit.
I’m… I’m sure you can handle this puzzle yourself!

Considering that showers are mentioned by both Sans and Alphys, chances are these bathrooms are literally for bathing or showering (Alphys even has a tub in the True Lab). Toilets don’t seem to exist, especially considering Papyrus’ phone call:

PAPYRUS:
WHERE ARE YOU? I HEAR WATER.
ARE YOU IN THE TOILET?
ALSO, WHAT’S A TOILET?

However…

NARRATION (during Shyren battle):
Sans is selling tickets made of toilet paper.

Sans, why? Toilet paper could come from the dump, though that doesn’t seem hygienic. But this leads to the next question: how would Chara get by in a toilet free world, and what effect would a monster food diet have on them?

I admit that when it comes to Caretaker AU, I have given this more thought than is probably necessary. I’m not a doctor, but I do have a basic understanding of physiology so please bear with me and my reasoning.

Humans have very complex systems for absorbing food (digestive system) and for keeping the blood clean (urinary system). Chara would not be able to survive long without water, and even magical water wouldn’t cut it: kidneys create urine in order to get rid of waste built up in the blood. And while a lot of this is metabolic (food) waste, the kidneys also clear out other waste such as dead blood cells. Urine plays an important role in staying healthy, which goes beyond just food.

As for the digestive system, food with perfect absorption into pure energy might actually cause terrible long term effects. While I don’t have any data on what happens if the lower intestine stops being used completely, I can say that an organ that stops being used has a tendency develop problems and/or fail. With how dependent humans are on regular eating cycles, I would be concerned that instantly converted food in the stomach would end up causing the the unused lower digestive tract to stagnate and even fail.

Therefore, while the monster in Grillby’s assumes that humans would experience the same perfect conversion from food into energy that monsters do, I theorize the experience would not quite be identical. Monster food would be immediately energizing and healing with a very efficient absorption rate, but some waste would still pass through the body, due to a non-magical human body being unable to convert all of it. Small amounts of monster food would still pass through the entire digestive tract, ensuring all organs are still functioning regularly.

And that’s why in this AU some buildings had to be outfitted with toilets in the Underground for Chara.

A PLAY ABOUT MAN'S SEARCH FOR MEANING IN TWO ACTS

ACT I

Cat, a lifeform specialized in detecting small prey animals and catching them: *sees a mouse, chases it, catches, eats it*
Human: “Wow evolution has made such a great hunter, look at it! Amazing!”

Cat: *sees a laser pointer dot, frantically tries to catch it but cannot, as it is just light*
Human: “lol too optimised for wanting to catch things am I right”

***

ACT II

Human, a lifeform specialized in using and making tools and seeing if tools are good for different tasks: *sees a knife* “Aha! Someone made this sharp tool to cut things. I see, it’s really good for that!”

Human: *looks at his own body* “Who made this?? What were they thinking? There’s some bigger hidden meaning behind this right? What am I made for… What is the purpose of my mortal life? Am I good? Am I bad? Is there a God? I keep looking for my destiny but alas, I can’t figure it out….”

Been wanting to draw Momo and Todoroki’s daemons for awhile! 

Momo with her house mouse, and Todo with his osprey~

They make a good team, no? X’D

WHY ARE THEY MAKING MORE MOVIES TO MAKE PEOPLE SCARED OF SHARKS??? WHY!!

More people a year die from DROWNING than shark bites.

So go on and make a movie about that.

Also, shark diving cages have buoys on them so they DON’T sink.

AND ALSO, those girls would have died on the way down 156 ft (47 meters) to the “bottom” cause they weren’t descending properly, controlling their buoyancy or equalize their ears. Human bodies cannot take that pressure so quickly.

UGGGH STOP MAKING SHARK MOVIES Unless its nice shark movies showing how cute they are. They’re not evil things looking to eat humans. There are 375 (to date) know species of sharks and only about a dozen are considered particularly dangerous. The 3 breeds responsible for most reports are tiger, bull and great whites. Bull sharks and tiger sharks are aggressive breeds. Great whites aren’t but they’re just so massive, a bite from them is not the same it would be from a smaller shark. With that, shark bites are usually never fatal. Most shark bites are just them checking out the scene cause they don’t have hands and when they realize you’re not food, they leave! Never blame the shark for biting you, you are in the water, their home. It’s the risk you’re willingly taking getting in. If you’re scared of getting bitten by a shark, don’t get in the water! Just like if you were scared of any other animal! You don’t get in a place that says there are snakes when you’re scared of snakes! Snakes live there, you don’t. So don’t go in if you don’t want to risk seeing or being bitten by a snake. Same with sharks and the ocean.

Sure, they’re maybe a hundred or so shark bite incidences a year but humans, with commercial fishing alone, kill hundreds of millions of sharks a year and that’s just commercial fishing!!! 

Sharks vital to ecosystem! Stop making people fear them and want them dead! We need them.