human pals

Dear Tumblr

Please stop recommending p-shifters/wing growing blogs to me

things sherlock holmes has canonically done:

  • scrapbooked the hell out of his newspapers
  • put on a hat that was too big for him 
  • giggled
  • cried because lestrade was nice to him
  • got all sappy and romantic by smelling a rose
  • let a puppy lead him on adventures
  • “impish mood”
  • lit his pipe with an ember from the fireplace because he thought it looked cool

feel free to add to this

Hello frindes, it me, Doctor Elly: Cat Docutor. Welcmom to my ofic, ples make yuself comfortbbable. 

Wow. It am discurouging time to be humn bein, huh?? Im sory human pal. Very scarey. Very strseful. Boy Im do Not Envy Yu!! Luckly I have brain sligtly slmaller than Shot Glass n don known anything or have any concpt of futur which is ver Nice. But like yu, I oftn find myself in situatin i don’t chuse, and, do not want neither. feel helpless 2 get out of situuantion. For expample, I am dont like Hugs. 

This not exact parallol to yu situatin watching apparnt rise of global fascism. But not NOT like! 

Here is what I think yu must rember. Many of yu, human bing, arm not used to constant low-level despair of feelin like yu liv in hostile worl, hostil society. but Many of yu brothers & sisters have been fleing this way longnn long lnngong and bad time. did not start in novemnmbr. will not go away if dondald Tormp not president. 

And those ppl are & have been fight. They use claws and teth and loud yelling to say LET ME OUT THIS HUG!!!!! even when it seem like nobdodyy listening.

They are not pretend it okay. They r not pretend not to be tired. they accpept this anger, sad, tired, and use for energy when they can. and when they cannt – in between claws and teth and yelling time – they also just liv. do dishes, make art, lauf at Nitflax show, eat a cheez treat. hug…….i gues. if yu like that kind of thing.

yu can fight best as person you ar. cannot fight as person pretend 2 be unscared all time, or as person who doesnt need break, or person who not tired. 

fact that yu can say “I am Tired now,” “I am hopeless now:” this is STRENGTH. does not feel like it, but is. let these things, sensntatins of hoplesns, have yu for a litle whyle. give them the time they want, & they will lose power to take ALL yu time.

also i give yu assignment if yu fel able, not if yu don’t. Assignment im suggest is go out tomorrow and engage with physiclal world. dont care how. bird watchin? dance clas? go to dog park or craft store? dont care. but take in information not thru Twit and Tumbll. Take in info not verblaly. Take in world with yu blurry eyes and ears & pointless nose & long creepy paws. And when yu get scare, remember me elly am alwyas here siting next to yu very warm and soft.

tiny purr. tiny tiny purr.

you know what’s really interesting to see in a sci-fi setting? Pop culture. What is the alien equivalent of Spongebob, something anyone can reference and everyone else will get the joke. What icons are there, real or fictional? Is there an alien equivalent of Harry Potter? do aliens have the equivalent of Comic-cons and/or anime cons?

Also humans and aliens sharing culture stuff. Humans and aliens celebrating their native holidays together so they feel less homesick. Aliens and humans showing their pals famous movies from their home planet.

anonymous asked:

Okay so you know how you have those friends that can speak another language and you ask them to teach you 'hello', and they teach you a swear instead? Which mtmte bots would do that to their poor human pal who just wants to learn cybertronian?

Who teaches you curse words and tells you it’s something else: Whirl, Rodimus, Swerve, Brainstorm, Rewind

Who teaches you curse words and tells you they’re curse words: Ratchet (you more-so just pick them up) Trailcutter, Tailgate, Chromedome, Riptide 

Who just straight up teaches you Cybertronian: Megatron, Drift, Ravage, Cyclonus, Perceptor, Rung, Nautica, Ultra Magnus

4

Overall it’s been a great day. I made myself a big fancy breakfast, sewed some zippered pouches, and bought a new mug for my collection :-)
Also got an adorable letter from eggplahnt !! I’ll cherish these treasures forever! 

Imagine PTA Sans always making sure he’s as nice as possible to Frisk’s human friends at school at the PTA meetings.  All kids sitting on the gym bleachers, absolutely bored to tears.  Sans can’t blame them.  Every time Helen’s monotone voice speaks up, he instantly falls asleep!  Linda shakes him and lectures ‘Sans, if you’re not going to participate, than go on the bleachers!’ 

Frisk overhears Linda and gets excited when Sans (after quietly mocking Linda under his breath) comes to sit with them and their friends.  Frisk hopping around and introducing each student to her awesome uncle Sans. “So you’re all Frisk’s friends huh?  Aw, kid that kinda hurts… after we got to the surface, ya replaced me and your other pals with humans!’ Sans smirks and ruffles their hair.  Sans turns over to a curly red haired little boy, who couldn’t be an older than Frisk.   The kids are quite confused and apprehensive at first.  But after shaking… oh, let’s call this kid… Mickey or something, and hearing a loud *PHBBBBBBT* from his hand!  Mickey draws back, absolutely confused until Sans shows a whoopee cushion hidden inside a glove.  

All kids are pretty much frozen in shock, until Frisk is absolutely hollering from laughter.  Soon after, all kids start laughing!  So whenever Sans got sent to the bench, he’d always entertain the kids and give them his best tips for pranks and setting people up to bad puns.  Soon, all the children after they outsmart there own parents are repeating ‘Get dunked on!’

Linda does not approve of these children’s behavior.  And begins telling the other parents that Sans is a bad influence as a guardian for Frisk and as attending the PTA meetings.  Sans pretty much ignores her and keeps enjoying his time to grow closer with Frisk and their friends… until Linda says something like ‘Ugh, just like a monster to teach their rude behavior and influence on our children… I bet that poor child is going to grow up in mental institution since it seems like she enjoys being around insane monsters so much!’ 

Yep.  That did it.  Sans could always brush off Linda’s comments with a quick joke since they were always directed at him.  But people he cares about?  And on a child no less?  Frisk, overhearing Linda’s cruel remark, tried to fight back tears in front of their best friends and pulls on Sans’ coat with as they looked up ‘S-sans?  What’s a institution?   Is it bad?  Am I really going there?’  Sans tried his best to hold in his anger for now, just long enough to comfort Frisk and give them a hug and tell them in the calmest voice he could attempts right now ‘Listen kiddo, nothing bad is gonna happen to ya… but I can’t guarantee something won’t happen to these humans in a few seconds.  Now go outside and play, make a sand sculpture of Linda’s face and spit on it for your uncle Sans, cause things are gonna get pretty ugly in here… in other words Frisk. Linda and her goons are in for a VERY b a d  t i m e’ Frisk knew that Sans’ full black eyed icy stare meant Sans was being completely serious. 

Frisk looked to their friends as they shouted out ‘Hey!  I call our own recess break!’ all the kids cheering as they rushed out the door.  Blue magic closing the squeaky gym door with a sudden slam.  The gym light’s flickered almost completely in sync with Sans steps towards Linda.  ‘So lemme get this straight Linda… I’m the monster here?’  Frisk felt the icy tingle of fear going down their own spine.  Frisk could only hope Sans would at least spare them.  

ID #29887

Name: Paula
Age: 19
Country: Canada

I’ve always wanted to have pen pals but didn’t really know how to find them so I got so excited when i found this tumblr. I was born and raised in El Salvador but I study by undergraduate degree in Canada. I can speak english, spanish and a little bit of french. My major is political science and I love talking about human rights issues or current political events. I also have an obsession with conspiracy theories and i love reading books fiction books and poetry. Lately I have been trying to become more positive and practice more self care on my life so I would appreciate to have someone to share that with. I also really enjoy music, my favorite song this month is female energy by Willow Smith.

Preferences: I would prefer 18-25 yrs of any gender. Please only contact to me if you have an open mind as i wouldn’t feel comfortable talking with racist or sexist people.

okay but what if america and japan are playing brawl and america loses so he lets out this scream of anguish and buried his face in his hands, pretending to cry hoping that japan will comfort him

and then japan leans in next to him and america thinks that the moment has come but then japan just whispers

no more mercy, white boy”

and america just looks at him and starts crying for real