human jenga

some forgotten adulting tips
  • if you’re running to the grocery store to just pick up one thing, grab a basket anyway. i can’t tell you how many times i’ve gone to pick up some milk and ended up grabbing dish soap and paper towels and deodorant and looked like a human jenga tower by the time i was at the checkout.
  • get yourself some dry shampoo! i don’t care how punctual you are, one day you’re gonna be DEAD tired and you’re gonna hit snooze one too many times and realize you’ve got 5 minutes to get out the door.
  • learn to cook at least a couple of big batch meals and eat it throughout the week. i’m a perpetually exhausted human being and if i need to live off of chili for 4 days, so be it.
5SOS (y/n) Imagine: Opening Act

“rt if you think they should date or fav if they’re just a hookup”

“They need a ship name!”

“(y/n)’s SOOOO talented I bet they sign her band to Hi or Hey”

An absurd fan edit of Ashton proposing ends your daily Twitter search. It’s only been 3 weeks since Ashton and Calum reached out towards your band on Youtube, and you’re now gaining 100′s of followers a day. They scheduled a “business” meeting (where you played human Jenga longer than you actually negotiated business) last weekend at their L.A. rental home.Somehow the fans took more pictures of you meeting Ashton in the driveway for 5 seconds than you’ve ever taken in your entire life. 

The lead singer of their previous opening act has a family wedding to attend in Europe, so they are unable to make the next 3 shows on 5sos’ tour. Your band is a mixture of pop music and rock- almost a female version of All Time Low without the secondhand embarrassment of their emo stage. You’re the lead vocalist, alongside your older twin cousins who play bass and lead guitar. Your drummer was an ex-boyfriend who ended up being a better percussionist than he was a boyfriend. Your band has played a handful of sold out local shows, along with a state-wide college campus tour (which has generated enough interest for a fan base). Ashton and Calum were made aware of your band’s undeniable stage presence after a bunch of your loyal fans repeatedly dm’d them your best tour video that has had over 6 million views so far.

“Venti or Grande?” 

“Venti!” you reply back to Ashton. He asked you to make a coffee run with him this morning before the afternoon concert rehearsal begins. The rest of the band was either sleeping off last night’s booze fest or grabbing some greasy chinese take-out (looking at you Michael Clifford). Ashton waits at the edge of the barista’s corner for your drink, while you grab a spot to sit outside.

“I didn’t know if you’d be hungry or not..so I grabbed you a muffin and a lemon cake slice, or a cake pop..I think it’s birthday cake flavored! Anyways, I can eat whatever you don’t want,” Ashton sets all of his purchases on the wooden table.

“I’m game for that lemon cake and let’s split that cake pop while we’re at it.”

“How does one split a cake pop?” 

“I’ll bite half, you bite half? Like on Lady and The Tramp when they share the spaghetti!”

You roll your eyes at Ashton as he licks part of the cake pop suggestively, you decide to take a bite out of it while he’s still holding it up to his mouth.

“No fair! That bite was totally more than half,” Ashton complains before eating the rest of it. 

The next hour and half slides by as you both scroll through your phones, showing each other places you want to visit thanks to tumblr. As per usual, a security van comes to pick you up just in time for rehearsal. On the way back to the arena you notice your name is trending alongside Ashton’s on Twitter. “Starbuck’s Lovers!” is the caption on an insanely zoomed in photo of you eating part of the cake pop. Another photo of Ashton taking a selfie of you and him has already been edited and angled to appear incredibly intimate. A bunch of your fans are already tweeting potential ship names for the relationship they think you and Ashton might be in. Ashton leans over the seat and reads a few of the tweets.

“You take a fellow musician out to coffee and suddenly you are getting married on stage tonight! They wouldn’t do this if I went to lunch with Pete Went..actuallly they still probably would have.. I love our fans, I really do, but sometimes they make things more dramatic than a soap opera.” Ashton comments on a few of the extreme tweets. 

“Some of them are sweet though- like this girl said she loves both of us because of our music and she hopes that we could make each other happier.”

Ashton nods before sinking back into the seat in front of you, he gazes out the window and you can’t help but notice his smile reflected onto the window. 

Once you start practicing your set with your less-than energized band, you notice that a few of 5sos’ crew members are hanging around backstage along with Michael and Ashton discussing tonight’s setlist.Once you finish your final song, you head backstage to chat with them. Michael is messing around with Ashton’s drum kit and it’s driving Ashton crazy.

“MICHAEL GORDON CLIFFORD! This is not Step-Brothers, I swear to god if you defile my set I will not play tonight.”

“Chill out Ash! I’m just hitting the drums with your stick things not putting my ball sack on them.” Michael’s smart ass comment causes Ashton to get off his chair.

You can’t help but laugh as Michael hits the drum one final time before running towards the stage exit. 

“He is such an ass- Let’s draw a dick on his concert outfit for tonight,” you laugh as Ashton grabs the costume box and finds Michael’s favorite ripped skinnies. You hand him a silver sharpie you have from editing your own setlist. He draws a rather large spaceship on Michael’s pants and you add a few meteors for good measure.

“That totally looks like a dick..”

“We have 6 year old fans, so shut up (y/n) it’s a spaceship.”

Ashton hands you the marker back, but he grabs your hand first.

“Hey!” you start to smack him away as closes his palms around you.

“Uhmm..see you tonight.” Ashton walks off as you start to wonder why he held your sweaty hand for so long.

(Fast forward to the concert)

You were nervous to perform to such a huge crowd, but the energy of your bandmates and the funny signs helped you power through the setlist. Just as you were about to sit down and perform your final, slow ballad the lights switched off. The lights were supposed to dim, but not turn completely off, unsure of what to do you decide to sit on your stool and hope that the crew fixes the mistake soon. An orange spotlight comes on and you start to realize that the crew didn’t mention this new addition to the lighting. Just as you start to begin your ballad, Ashton drags his own stool onto the stage and along with his personal guitar he showed you last week.

“What is going on?” you whisper as you start to strum the beginning of the song.

“Just go with it! And give me a few verses,” he winks as he joins in on his guitar.

“Traveling doesn’t mean I’ve left my heart. I’ve just began finding it, help me find myself by finding you.”

“I’ll find you..I’ll find you if you find me,” Ashton sings the response.

“Miles are what I want, sunsets are what I collect, and I can see the journey in your eyes, so let’s adventure…”

“I’ll find you when you find me..I’ll find you” Ashton drags the notes out longer than his last part.

“The road is only scary when I’m alone,” your voice starts to waver a little as you notice Ashton paying full attention to you. It dawns on you that he must have planned this awhile ago, because everyone is watching your performance backstage- Michael even gives Ashton a thumbs up.You finish the rest of the song and struggle not to laugh as Ashton makes up his own verses about your favorite song to sing in the shower (something that you’d shared with him earlier during a game of 20 questions). As the song ends it’s obvious that Ashton has something to say before your band comes back on for the final bow. 

“(y/n), I know we haven’t known each other long..so this is kinda a long shot- I want to to ask you something in front of all of our loving, wonderful fans so you can’t turn me down,” he laughs as most of the fans scream and clap, finally realizing what he is doing.

“Will you grab another coffee with me sometime and maybe a little dinner or a movie.. we could save the world, go swimming, or whatever you want? It doesn’t have to be Starbucks, I just want to take you out on a real date sometime,” his boyish smile is directed towards the ground and you can tell that he’s actually nervous that you’ll turn him down.

Much to all the fans’ dismay, you lower your microphone headset down and whisper a coy “yes” into Ashton’s ear so that they can’t hear what you’re saying. Ashton however gives away your answer when his faces lights up like a suburban house in December.

Amazing Day.

I had such a great day today!

I went to Woodhall Residential Centre, and tried archery! I sucked at it, and kept flinching because when the bow whipped back it kept hitting against my arm. Which stung like hell. So then the guy gave me an arm protector, but it was leather, so I felt guilty because, y'know, dead cow! I got a bit better though, and I might not of scored any bulls eyes, but I managed to get it within the target after a few shots.

Then, I played human Jenga! This was..an experience. Three of us were strung up on harnesses and had to climb higher and higher up a tower of milk crates as it was steadily built higher. Then when it toppled we hung suspended awkwardly until we were lowered down. Yeah, so that was fun, even if my team [all being the oldest and tallest, and thus most unstable] got the worst score [nine crates high]. But hey, it’s the taking part, not the winning.

Then we had to do like a wooden climbing obstacle course thing. This consisted of climbing a ladder, running across a wooden plank, jumping a gap onto another wooden plank, scaling your way up a tree trunk/telephone post - like structure, then scrambling onto logs suspended by chains and walking across them. I made it up the pole, flung myself up onto the logs and got stuck in an awkward, half upside down, sloth like position. Unable to pull myself up, I went to lower myself down only to find I couldn’t reach the footholds. And thus, I had to drop from a height of about two stories, trusting only a skinny looking teenage boy to lower me down. I thought he’d drop me. He promised he wouldn’t. He didn’t. Bully for him.

Afterwards, I was brave foolish enough to scramble up another ladder and pole like structure and onto a narrow ledge. At an awkward angle from the footholds, I had to fling myself onto my stomach on said ledge and drag myself forward onto it. All the while thinking don’t look down, but in that position, you either have to look down or not look at all. I’ve never had a problem with heights before. Looking straight down a two story drop, knowing you’re about to drop and have only a flimsy looking harness and an old man to save you changed this a bit. I felt quite faint as I dragged myself to my feet. The idea was to jump towards and try to hit a suspended, red ball. This idea is relatively simple until you take into consideration the height and the two things your are bestowing your trust into. Well, I thought to myself as the cold numbness of anxiety began to spread through my body, gazing at the ball and trying to ignore the drop. It’s now or never. My muscles locked up as I leapt, but I managed to hit the stupid ball and suddenly the ground was rushing to meet me very quickly. Apparently the old guy hadn’t been expecting me to jump so soon. He was so unprepared I even lifted him up a little before he managed to stop me half way into the fall. Heart stopping moment right there. Needless to say, my feet were very pleased to be back on solid ground.

There was a barbeque. The only vegetarian choice was apples. Oh discrimination. Regardless, my sister bought me a salad sandwich from the shop and thus I was content with it. After lunch we got dolled up in helmets and life jackets, the new trend, clearly, and headed down to the River Bann. This was where the fun really began!

I tried banana boating, something I have never done before and would love to do again! I also had a go in a kayak, and spent a lot of time swimming around. Pretty sure I accidentally downed about seven glasses worth of dirty river water. I finished up with a final go on the banana boat. The man driving tipped us off, in the middle of the river, then let us all climb in and ride in his speed boat. Afterwards we jumped out and swam back to the shore. Soaking and freezing we made the bus journey back and got changed into dry clothes.

So yeah.

My day was awesome.


still thinking about the fluff from last night and here i am, procrastinating reverb by writing senseless cute. not rreally nsfw, but there is nudity. i didn’t edit this soooooo it is what it is. (wiggles fingers)

-

His damn legs are too long and it’s an inconvenience.

Pre-growth spurt, he would’ve had no difficulty whatsoever fitting in their damn bathtub with her. He’d been just shorter than her, and she’s always been so slim – it would have been much easier to play human jenga with her when he was fourteen and not so lanky. Then again, at fourteen, brushing his meister’s damp hair over her pale shoulder to kiss her damp skin had been barely a thought in his mind, only a fever dream, so maybe it’s just not meant to be. Maybe he’s just never meant to hold his tiny wife, in a bath full of blushing bubbles, while settling back and wondering how life could ever be this good.

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Zaina + Imaad

I am in love with this wedding. The bride looked so so beautiful mashAllah, her white and copper dress was amazing. The wedding itself looked chill and so much fun to be at. The photobooth, the human size jenga, and even the ice bucket challenge (i’m guessing) it all looks like so much fun. In shaa Allah this couple is blessed by Allah swt Ameen.