Humans are Weird: Seasons

I was thinking about how Earth is probably one of the rare planets with seasonal climates, due to its wonky tilted axis. So Earth has a crazy variety of climates and weather patterns, and humans have just learned how to deal, much to the confusion of everybody else. 

This was turning into a headcanon about how humans are bizarrely prepared for anything, and then I had a thought- Space Cruises

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BOYS ONLY: How to Survive Anything! 
Table of Contents:
How to Survive a shark attack
How to Survive in a Forest
How to Survive Frostbite
How to Survive a Plane Crash
How to Survive in the Desert
How to Survive a Polar Bear Attack
How to Survive a Flash Flood
How to Survive a Broken Leg
How to Survive an Earthquake
How to Survive a Forest Fire
How to Survive in a Whiteout
How to Survive a Zombie Invasion
How to Survive a Snakebite
How to Survive if Your Parachute Fails
How to Survive a Croc Attack
How to Survive a Lightning Strike
How to Survive a T-Rex
How to Survive Whitewater Rapids
How to Survive a Sinking Ship
How to Survive a Vampire Attack
How to Survive an Avalanche
How to Survive a Tornado
How to Survive Quicksand
How to Survive a Fall
How to Survive a Swarm of Bees
How to Survive in Space


GIRLS ONLY: How to Survive Anything! 
Table of Contents:
How to survive a BFF Fight
How to Survive Soccer Tryouts
How to Survive a Breakout
How to Show You’re Sorry
(and chapter 3 is where we no longer care about “survival”)
How to Have the Best Sleepover Ever
How to Take the Perfect School Photo
How to Survive Brothers
Scary Survival Dos and Don'ts
(“don’t throw things or yell at your ghost. it may react badly.”)
How to Handle Becoming Rich
How to Keep Stuff Secret
How to Survive Tests
How to Survive Shyness
How to Handle Sudden Stardom
More Stardom Survival Tips
How to Survive a Camping Trip
(“fresh air is excellent for the skin”)
How to Survive a Fashion Disaster
How to Teach Your Cat to Sit
(are you #$&^%*@ kidding me?)
How to Turn a No Into a Yes
Top Tips for Speechmaking
How to Survive Embarrassment
How to Be a Mind Reader
How to Survive a Crush
Seaside Survival
(don’t wear heels. tie your hair back. sunglasses add glamour.)
How to Soothe Sunburn
How to Pick Perfect Sunglasses
Surviving a Zombie Attack
How to Spot a Frenemy
Brilliant Boredom Busters
How to Survive Truth or Dare
How to Beat Bullies
How to be an Amazing Babysitter

I came across these books myself and remarked on them to Jenn, but didn’t pick them up to open them.  Jackie did, and it’s her comments in italics there.  These books were published this year by Scholastic.  They are not, as you have have guessed by the insane sexism, published in the 1950s.  Scholastic: this is not your proudest moment?

Maybe - MAYBE - How To Pick Perfect Sunglasses is actually in the same class as Surviving When Your Parachute Fails.  And maybe the authors truly believed this but also truly believed these two identical classes of disasters (for some reason?) needed to be in separate books.  If you ever find yourself in this situation, please oh please don’t say “THIS ONE IS FOR BOYS AND THIS IS FOR GIRLS”.  Perhaps instead say “THIS ONE HAS A BUNCH OF INTERESTING REAL-LIFE DISASTER SURVIVAL AND THIS ONE HAS A LOT OF PERSONAL HYGIENE AND INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP STUFF IN IT, ALSO, TIPS ON GETTING YOUR CAT TO SIT DOWN, I DUNNO”.

The content of the book is what really makes it egregious, though I do recognize I react to “boys only” and “girls only” in most contexts really negatively (dating profiles and middle school sex ed classes being I suppose some exceptions).  I can’t help subbing in other groups that have had privilege:

How To Survive Anything!  STRAIGHT PEOPLE ONLY

How To Survive Anything!  WHITE PEOPLE ONLY

Wow those book titles seem really horrible, huh?  Weiiiiiiiiiiiird

Don’t Let Me Go Pt.2

Warnings; sad spencer, violence, mentions of blood and wounds, cursing, angst and sad fluff at the end


SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG!!! I had a messy day and I start school tomorrow again so I decided to get this out quick before I had to go back. Anyways, here is the much requested part two ! I hope you all enjoy it and it lives up to expectations :’) much love <33333 (sorry for any mistakes !!)

Tagged peep; @skeletoresinthebasement


Spencer walked into the sheriff’s department with JJ following closely behind. It was chaotic as everyone rushed around and phones rang within seconds of each other.

“What did we miss?” JJ asks as a frowning Hotch comes towards them. “Was there another murder?”

“Not yet,” Hotch sighs. “The unsub totaled Morgan and Y/N’s squad car. He took her.”

For the first time that day, the mention of Y/N’s name sparked full attention in Spencer. JJ looks over at him as tears begin to pool in his eyes.

“H-Have you guys found them?” Spencer asks worriedly.

“We’re working on it,” Hotch says sympathetically. “Fortunately, Y/N has her phone on her and we’re hoping Garcia can trace it.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Spencer begins wracking his brain with solutions and thoughts on how he could save the love of his life, but he kept coming up empty.

“I’m sorry, Reid,” Hotch shakes his head, “but there is nothing we can do right now except to wait on Garcia.”

JJ frowned as she put a hand on his shoulder in a small attempt to get him to calm down.

“She’s going to be okay, you know that right?” JJ says and Spencer shakes his head.

“I-I don’t know,” Spencer sputters out. “Before you called, we had gotten into an argument and I kind of left things unresolved. I know how she is and I know she gets really drained when I ignore her the way I do, and I don’t know why I do that to her when I know it hurts her. What if when she wakes up, she won’t have the energy to defend herself because of me.”

“Spencer, look at me,” JJ puts her hands on Spencer’s shaking arms and makes him face her way. “Y/N is a trained agent and an exceptional profiler, she knows what to do and how to survive. If anything were to slow her down, my guess is that it would be to any injuries she got in the crash.”

Spencer tries to blink away the tears, but they keep coming right back up.

“Excuse me,” he mutters as he tears himself away from JJ’s grip and hurries outside of the building.

His mind was racing with the endless possibilities of how you could be hurt or how long you have to live. On top of being kidnapped by a sadistic serial killer, you also had unattended injuries that were bleeding out and being exposed to bacterias.

As Spencer stood outside, kicking rocks on the ground, tears falling down his face, and a heavy weight on his chest, he noticed a police car pull up to the sheriff’s department. Morgan quickly jumped out of the passenger side of the car, his left arm in a sling and a bandage on his cheek bone that was adorned with smaller cuts around it.

Derek looked around the parking lot and frowned deeply when his eyes landed on the broken genius by the curb.

“Reid!” Morgan calls and scuffles towards him.

“How did it happen?” Spencer gulps as he looks at Morgan with a small disappointment, somewhat blaming this whole thing on him. Morgan sighs and gives him an ‘are you sure?’ look and Spencer nods.

“We were on our way to the coroner’s and at a stoplight, Y/N noticed a car that fit the one we had for the unsub. At first, I thought she was crazy because it was gone before I noticed it, but then it hit us.”

“Where did it hit?”

“Once in the back, twice on her side,” Morgan looks down in sadness. “I tried getting us out of there. When I woke up, I saw them. She put up a hell of a fight with all those wounds-”

“Shut up!” Spencer snaps as he presses his hands to his ears. Dismay fell over him at the details of Derek’s explanation.

“Kid, I promise you we will get this son of a bitch,” Morgan assures him. “I got his plate numbers and we’ll be at his house soon.”

As if it were on cue, Emily stepped out of the building with JJ, Rossi, and Hotch following behind.

“Guys, we’ve got an address,” Emily announces to the two men. “If we wanna save Y/N, we have to go now.”


Your eyes began to adjust in the dimly lit room,  and then your body followed. You tried to get up or move only to realize that you were strapped to a chair. The second you moved a limb, a sharp pain struck you in the stomach and thigh causing you to let out a scream.

Panic begin to set in as you remembered the events that led you here. Flashes of glass shattering, the world spinning, and a pair of black boots clouded your thoughts.

“Ah, you’re awake.”

Speaking of the devil.

A dirty looking, drug abusing man came out from the shadows. The closer he stepped towards you, the more you could smell the must and alcohol radiating off of him.

“Please don’t hurt me,” You yelp. “I guarantee you that when you’re caught, and you will be, you will not get special treatment. Especially when you’re charged with the murder of an agent.”

“I’m not going to get caught, darling,” he snickers as he reaches forward to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear. You moved your head away the second his skin came in contact with yours. Angry with your reaction, he wraps a hand behind your neck and pushes your head towards him. “I’ve been killing women like you for years. Dozens. Even if they were to catch me, they have no evidence. I’ve made sure of that. So what makes you think they’ll catch me? You’ll be dead before you could speak.”

“Because you were messy with my capture,” you chuckle slightly. “You rammed into a government vehicle, leaving the imprint of your truck all over it. My partner woke up before you took me meaning he probably wrote down your license plate. And honestly, if you were as smart as you made yourself out to be - you would have patted me down to remove any technology on me. I’m surprised you didn’t notice, but I’ve had my unit chief on the phone and I’ve been stalking my so-called death by distracting you with a conversation.”

“You bitch,” he sneers.

“A man’s ego will often get the best of him,” you tease. The sound of sirens coming from every direction of the house caused your heart to flutter with hope. You knew they would save you.

The unsub let out a growl as he turned your chair around to undo the ropes around your arms and legs.

“Good thing I injured you pretty bad,” he comments. “Or else you’d be fighting back by now.”

He pulled you up from the chair and a pain filled yelp left your throat as your muscles contracted under your wounds.

“FBI!” Hotch broke through the door, letting a ray of sunshine into the room followed by someone equivalent to that. A very scared Spencer entered the room, his eyes scanning over the situation and you.

“Daniel, we know why you’re doing this,” Spencer began.

“You don’t know anything,” the unsub, Daniel, spits. You feel a cool metal being pressed against your temple and you momentarily feel your heart speed up.

“Yes, I do,” Spencer begins to panic. “Someone who looks a lot like Y/N, broke your heart. Kate was the love of your life, and she just cheated on you like you meant nothing.”

“Shut up,” Daniel yells. The gun began to dig deeper into your skin as Daniel got angrier.

“Spencer,” you cry out as Daniel tightens the headlock you’re in.

“Oh I see what’s going on here,” Daniel laughs sinisterly. “She’s your girl?”

Spencer said nothing as he watched you with a pained expression as you struggle in the man’s grip.

“Daniel, we have the house surrounded,” Hotch warns. “If you do anything to harm her, you will be shot down.”

“Does this count as harming her?” He questions as he turns his head towards you and begins kissing your cheek.

“Stop!” You yell as you elbow him in the stomach. For a split second, your out of Daniel’s grip - and a second is all it takes for everything to go downhill. You watch as a rage overtakes his features, you messed up. You triggered him by rejecting him and that’s all that took him to turn him into a loose cannon. The gun in his hand was pointed towards you and as you heard Spencer’s yells, the room filled with the sound of three triggers being pulled and bullets being released. One came in contact with your chest, and the other two struck Daniel in the torso.

Everything sounded muffled and nothing looked clear as you let your head hit the ground. The black spots in your vision began appearing, but before everything went completely dark, you watched a broken Spencer fall to the ground beside you and gather you up in his arms. You couldn’t feel it, but you felt the flutter in your heart every time he was near - and then there’s nothing.


Spencer sat in the cold and uncomfortable chair right beside your bed. His leg was jumping in all sorts of directions and his head was buried in his hands.

A punctured lung, a burst appendix, and a deep wound in your thigh.

Spencer had tried convincing himself for the past two weeks that he sat in this hospital that you were going to be okay, but his mind kept telling him that you wouldn’t.

People came and go. Your room was filled with balloons, stuffed animals, and cards written in love. Spencer had been there since you arrived. Sitting by your bedside, praying to anything that would keep you alive.

A very sad JJ walked into the room with Derek following behind.

“Spencer, you know she wouldn’t want you killing yourself over here,” JJ suggests sadly, “why don’t you go home and rest.”

“No, I’m not leaving,” Spencer quickly interjects.

“You’ve been here every day, kid,” Morgan frowns. “You haven’t eaten, hell I don’t think you’ve slept.”

The two agents worried for their friend’s health. His eyes were rimmed with red, decorated with the dark purple bags sitting under his eyes. His cheek bones were much more prominent and his cheeks were hollowed and spiked with scruff.

“I don’t want to leave her,” Spencer cries.

“I know,” JJ wipes away a tear of her own before walking over to the hunched over man and placing a hand on his cheek in a comforting way. “She’s been like this for too long, Spence. I  know this sounds horrible, but she’s suffering and maybe if we find the strength to let her go, then maybe she can finally be in peace.”

“No, no,” Spencer lets his head fall onto the bed, his hand reaching over to interlock with yours. “I can’t.”

“We’ll leave you to it,” Morgan adds quietly.

When JJ and Morgan are fully out of the room, Spencer takes the time to try and compose himself for you. He looks up at your face, covered in bruises and small cuts.

“I’m sorry this happened to you,” he begins tearfully. “I’m sorry that you’re on life support. I’m sorry that I let the unsub get you. I’m sorry that I couldn’t save you in time. I’m sorry that I’m so selfish that I can’t let you go. But most of all, I’m sorry that I didn’t fix us before you ended up like this.”

Spencer looked down at the white bed sheets where your hand and his lied, entwined with each other. He brings the pair to his forehead and closes his eyes.

“But I have to do right by you,” he sniffles. “If you want me to let you go, I will. But please, of you’re somewhere in there and you can somehow hear me, give me a sign. Give me a sign, and I promise I will never ignore you the way I did, ever again. I promise you will spend every day, loved. Please, Y/N, give me something. I love you.”

Little did he know, that his words of courage spoke to the empty void you found yourself in. And somehow, with any strength and brain activity in you, you managed to give his hand a light squeeze.

A sharp intake of breath leaves Spencer’s lips as he looks at your hand in his. A second squeeze came from you to reassure him that he didn’t imagine it.

“Nurse!” Spencer desperately calls out. As nurses begin to rush in, Spencer leans in to kiss your cheek. “I won’t let you go.”

The nurse calls in the doctor to point out the sudden miracle of you breathing on your own. Spencer felt a twinkle in his heart that he hadn’t felt in the past two weeks, a twinkle of hope.

He knew you would be okay.

anonymous asked:

is Dark taking questions again? how'd you survive, man? has anything changed?

He will be taking questions again along with all the other Egos and Tiny Box Tim! However, this Dark will have no memories of June 19 because that Dark is very much dead and gone. New timeline, new Dark!

Begin again

The following post is based on a prompt by @cyrusbriar. The microfic you asked for shall require some more posts and will be completed in a few subsequent ones. Please comment and criticise.

This is not how human beings live. This is not how anything can survive. Hopes. Dreams. Nothing.
This was what 40 year old Melanie thought as she cleaned the diaper of her 2 year old daughter, Rose. She was in a hurry today. Her elder son, Cedric, was a special child. His teacher called her to discuss his future prospects and by that as Melanie knew very well, the principal was going to try to kick him out of school again. She was tired of all this.
She missed being young and beautiful. She missed being happy. She missed havimg hopes and dreams and the capability to live her life. She missed her youth.
But life has taken the wrong turn for Melanie at a very young age. The initiator of all her misfortunes being Hugo. Her beloved Hugo.
She met him in the Cafe. She worked there part time as a waitress and he was there for a coffee. With the perfect smile and shining blue eyes, Hugo was a sight to behold. It was not uncommon to fall in love with people like him. But what was different was that he was much more than good looks. He was one of the few people in the world who were not caught up with everything. He had his own speed. His own axis. His own world. He was not the one to conform.
And that was what caught Melanie’s eye. The first time they talked, Melanie couldn’t stop feeling better. And Melanie believed it was love and love alone, when you suddenly feel better when you talk with a person without ever being sick. It was his company that made her happy. At that time, she did not need anything if she had Hugo.
And that’s what she did.
She left everything- her father’s house and hence her right on his multi billion property, her friends, her emerging writing career, her college and basically everything she could fall back on if things went wrong. Because for Melanie, if Hugo was there, things will never go wrong.
Maybe that’s where she went wrong. What if Hugo was not around? Why didn’t she think of it?
Hugo died in a car crash three years ago. Rose was only one year old and how she cried “dada” when she saw them put him in the coffin broke Melanie’s heart into a thousand pieces. Even Cedric, who usually needed help with everything, cried. He understood. But then, things like this, Melanie wished, he couldn’t comprehend.
She cleaned the table Cedric was eating on and put her clothes in the drier. She didn’t want to be late to the meeting.

That’s it for the first installment. @cyrusbriar, how is it?

Fools Fall in Love (4/8) (Trixya 50s AU) - Vixen

So I know its been so fucking long since I updated this, and I apologise so much! But hopefully this makes up for it, the relationship is FINALLY going somewhere, and let me know if you guys like it, because I swear, everytime I write this, it goes off in a totally different direction and this chapter is a little shorter, but I didnt want to unnecessarily pad it out. -Vixen

Trixie’s Dress Katya’s Dress Trixie’s Song Katya’s Song

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The Pajama Fic: Part 7

*Okay so here is the next installment. Its a little different from the rest of the fic because it is about the friendship more than anything. however I am about to write a short smut bit that fits onto the end. I hope you like it, I’m sorry if it’s not what you wanted but I thought you might like some light relief before some more soppy stuff later on.*

And today was a good day. Up until now Sony had asked everyone to vlog their experiences around the area and in the house with everyone that would eventually be used for promotions on our own personal channels. They had also given everyone these super cool tiny cameras so we could take candid videos of each other which had resulted in mass hilarity around the house - especially with the constant stream of pranks that seemed to occur every ten minutes. But today the activities began. Sont had planned a week and a half of trips and activities for everyone to get involved in to show how their new cameras could survive anything. First up was an assault course.

When you and the rest of the youtubers had heard about this none of you had realise how serious this assault course might be. There had been mixed reactions when the special letter had arrived through the door announcing the day’s activity but everyone had put on their best outdoor exploring clothes and were generally drumming up excitement. Some people had actually got their shit together, like Alfie and Jack, and were wearing hiking boots and sturdy looking trousers. Yourself and Dan however, were in the bunch of people who rarely ever saw daylight, never mind took part in outdoor activities, so were stuck with normal skinny jeans or tracksuit trousers. You and Dan smirked at each other as you waited for the coach to arrive as you were both wearing black trackies which were the closest either of you could find to outdoors clothes, originally you actually brought along with the intention to laze around in them. Tyler however looked the funniest. He had managed to borrow some running leggings off one of the girls which were a bit too short for him and showed his ankles. He also had bought matching camouflage bandanas with Zoe and they had tied them around their foreheads in an attempt to look ‘more like Rambo’ as Tyler had explained enthusiastically.

When you got to the activity however it was a little more extreme than you imagined. First off the journey was about 2 hours long and you had already set off late afternoon meaning the whole activity was going to take place in the dark. Also the small space meant  everyone went crazy confined into one coach. Secondly when you arrived at the facility it was actually a huge, intimidating open area full of every type of obstacle you can imagine; rope bridges, mud pits, sheer ways and a large netted area. The whole thing also attached onto the side of a large warehouse that you were first lead into.

“Hello there!” Said a rather muscled lady in a vest and camo trousers. A couple of cameras pointed at the group of you and scanned the arena as she talked. “This facility you see infront of you is state of the art and is most commonly used for movie shoots based on army camps and involving high level combat training. But for the day it’s going to be used by all of you!” There were a few shared looks of utter terror which you joined in on. “You’ll be working in twos or threes and each team is going to be kitted out with these babies.” She hold out a think back vest with a small red light blinking from an LED in the shoulder strap. “You see this recognises every time you get hit by one of the lasers from our cute little zaper over there.” She point behind the group and you all swivel round to see a bunch of surly men carrying large sci-fi like guns. There’s a few mutters of appreciation from a couple of the guys and a loud “Oh goodness me.” From Tyler who looks both terrified at the prospect of holding a gun but appreciative of the view of all these men that had snuck in behind the group. You feel a camera train in at you and Dan as you share a terrified look. “As well as completing the course outside you will also take part in a realistic tactical training exercise that take place in a maze of corridors at the other end of this warehouse in which you will have to shoot targets with the zappers we provide and avoid the security defenses put in place.” There is another chorus of appreciative words from the group before the lady finishes off. “Okay now guys lets get you changed, we have a full set of uniforms to wear and then we’ll get started.” You all head off to the side room where full camo jumpsuits are provided and you all change and discuss your general terror at what is to come, except Tyler who just seems delighted his headband matches his jumpsuit. Next you are fitted with some of Sony’s small body camera that are going to be used to record the event and split into teams.

“Hey Phil” You call over to him as he stands alone and fiddles with his jumpsuit pockets. “Do you wanna join our dream team.” You say nodding at Dan who is stood next to you. He comes to in you and soon after you’re all filming a pre-assault course interview where you talk about the camera and any tactics you might use to get through.

“I think we’re just hoping to survive the course really.” Says Dan jokingly.

“Yeah I sometimes struggle getting to the top of the stairs in our flat I doubt I’d be able to climb a sheer wall!” Adds Phil in a desperate tone. “Save me!” he whispers directly into the camera causing us all to laugh. Before you know it we were all waiting at the start line, our ‘zappers’ had been placed half way through the course so we couldn’t start shooting each other until the game actually got going. However first we had to get through some of the trickiest parts of the assault course. The aim was to get your whole team through in the fastest amount of time and with the least amount of points deducted from people hitting your vest-thingy. It was simple enough. Flood lamps flood the arena and you start giggling with nervousness.

“5, 4, 3 ,2, 1, go, go, go!” Shouts someone over a megaphone and the whole bunch of you, screaming and laughing, begin the course by climbing up and over a rope pyramid. Alfie was the first one over, screaming “Suck it!” as he jumped the last few feet onto the ground. However this was his downfall because what he thought was earth was actually thick, deep mud that he sunk into up to his knee.

“Oh My God Alfie!!” Screamed Zoe who was on his team as she reached his side and attempted to pull him out. You reached the end of the net and looks across the mud pit in front of you.

“Dan, Ohil!” You shouted to the boys who were still a little bit behind you. “You have to step on it lightly so you won’t sink in far!”.

“Go ahead. We’ll catch up.” Shouts Dan waving you on. “You step lightly onto the mud that everyone was beginning to sink into and attempt to take the lightest steps possible. You find you don’t sink in anywhere near as far as Alfie and he swears at you as you reach the other side quickly. You turn to see Dan and Phil are level with the pit and Tyler is stuck up to his knees like Alfie. “Step in, don’t jump!” You shout at them and they nod and try. Considering they are quite big they get across it relatively quickly and you run on, high fiving each other as you do.

Next you have to crawl under some low hanging netting. You reach it to find Connor and Troye are already attempting it, having done pretty well. You look to Dan momentarily.

“Ladies first.” He says in mock courtesy and you grimace at him before getting on your stomach and starting to crawl.

“Oh my Gerd it’s horrible.” You scream as the mud presses against you. You can hear Dan and Phil laughing behind you. You crawl out the other side and turn back to them. “Your turn now you dorks.” You shout enthusiastically and they grimace and start. They had no right to laugh at you because the amount of complaining they shouted about messing up their hair had you in stitches of laughter by the time they reached your side.

“Oh holy mother of jesus I hate mud.” You hear Tyler say as he reaches the netting. Somehow since you last saw him he has managed to cover literally his whole body in a coat of wet mud except for the perfect oval of his face which is screwed up in disgust. You double over laughing at the sight of him as he swears at you before beginning to attempt the net too.

Your group runs on a bit and watches as Connor makes it to the top of a tall sloping bit of wood before swinging his leg over the top and with one last swear at you, slides down the other side.

“We’ll get you Connor!” Shouts Phil before attempting to run up the sheer slope, slipping on the smooth surface and immediately falling over onto his face. You and Dan stand there cry laughing as he groans on the floor until you hear a triumphant “Yeeaaah”  From behind you as you see Alfie running at full tilt towards you, him Zoe and Tyler all completely coated in mud.

“Come on Philly” Shout Dan pulling Phil off the floor and attempting to climb the wall slowly this time, slipping on nearly every step. he reaches the top and in turn help you and Phil up and you all slide down the other side together, Phil not being able to stop himself from going “Weeee!” on the way down.

You run onto the next obstacle, now beginning to feel competitive with the other group so close behind you. One by one you step onto the thick rope and hold onto the guiding rope above your head and gradually make you way across. This is when you discover that as a team you have the worst balance of anyone evr and being to swing from side to side. However this work in your favour when Alfie, charging ahead of his group again, climbs onto the rope and immediately gets thrown off into another mud pit beneath you.

“No Alf. Why? Not Again.” Cries Zoe who saw him fall and no doubt had already had enough of pulling him out of mud pits.

“Go! Go! Go!” You shout, and you all turn away from the struggling Zoe and keep shuffling along the rope. Once you get to the other side however you were faced with the worst thing yet; a 6ft high wall. Dan and Phil immediately start fake crying at it and you roll your eyes. You can just about reach the top of the wall but climbing over it is not going to happen. Deafeated and winded you step back for a moment and Dan grabs the top of the wall as if to attempt to climb it.

“Oh, wait a sec.” He says, easily able to reach over the wall because of his height. He grabs something on the other side and pull over a rope ladder that is secured to the overside of the wall.

“Oh that makes it easier.” You concede, shrugging your shoulders and taking it in turns to climb over. As you get to the other side you hear Tyler panting and approach behind you.

“Reel it in!” Phil shouts at Dan and he pulls the ladder back over in time to hear Tyler swear again.

“You god damn tall pieces of shit!” He shouts and you laugh and high five. Only when you turn round to face your next obstacle you hear a definite ‘pew’ noise. You’ve reached the doorway to the warehouse where Connor has just collected his ‘zapper’ and is running into the entrance and firing back at you. Dan and Phil scream but you’ve seen enough action movies and decide instead to duck and forward roll away from the firing line towards the rack the guns stand on. You pick on up and check its on before looking back at your team.

“What the hell that was so cool!” Phil say in suprise and Dan nods appreciatively. You laugh as you realised you’re croach next to the table, no doubt smeared in mud and holding a gun and they are stood somehow still managing to maintain their fringes and standing awkwardly.

“Come on guys it was just a forward roll.” You say defensively but you shouldn’t have bothered because as you stood up you tripped over your own boot and fell on your face. They laugh again but now you can hear Alfie, Zoe and Tyler arguing on the other side of the wall and you decide to keep moving. Dan and Phil grab their guns and you enter the dark warehouse. Connor and Troye have long gone and you enter the building searching the dark for any movement.

“Oooh this is just like COD” says Dan aiming his gun about the room. You shhh him and he raises an eyebrow.

“They could be anywhere.” You whisper far too seriously. “Lets keep our cover by sticking to the sides of the room.” You say, your competitive streak starting to come out. Dan and Phil giggling behind, you walk into the room and round the corner, sweeping your room with the gun to try and spot anybody that was ahead of you. You make your way through the rooms and targets pop out at you. Here you all discover that Dan is a surprisingly good shot and your confidence picks up. You hear a group of people enter the warehouse, chattering loudly and gesture for Dan and Phil to stop. You crouch down and whisper quietly.

“Okay guys, they don’t know where we are so I think we should ambush the and try to knock off a few points!”. Dan and Phil agree and you take your positions, working surprisingly well as an undercover team. Joey is actually the first to round the corner and you guess he must have overtaken Tyler and the others. He is easily distinguishable because he is humming the mission impossible theme tune. Giving a quick nod to the boys in their hiding places you charge out half screaming, half laughing scaring Joey so much he slips over backwards screaming. You shoot at him for a couple of seconds and the run off, unable to stop yourselves from laughing hysterically from the sight of him on the floor.

Eventually you reach a door that reads ‘Exit’ in glowing writing and triumphantly you swing it open to find yourself in the part of the warehouse that you had your talk in earlier. The camera crew guys and the host lady clapped you as you came out as well as Connor and Troye who were sat on some seats drinking from water bottles and looking worn out. You turned triumphantly to your team and highfived Phil and Dan and then drew them in for a muddy team hug.

“Well done team!” Said the lady. “Great timing we’ll go over the winners in a minute.”. One by one the teams arrived in varying states of disrepair, mainly covered in mud, or in Joey’s case covered in green slime.

Once you were all stood around or sat on the floor the host stood up again.

“Well I would like to say I’m impressed but mainly that was just hilarious to watch.” She started to a round of cheering from some of the last teams. “I would also like to say that Connor and Troye were the winners because they got here first however they failed to arrive with all their team members!”

“Yeah!” Taunted the slime covered Joey in reply, who had obviously been a part of the team who they left behind early on. Jokingly they received a round of boos.

The team that did won notonly managed to work well together, but also managed to shoot one person 43 times before running away”. Joey booed again at that. “So I am pleased to announce that our winners today and masters of outdoor pursuit are Dan, Phil and Y/N!” you receive a cheer and stand to collect a little gold figurine of a army man running.  

“This is not something I thought I would ever win.” Says Dan to the camera man that was now filming you.

2 hours later everyone arrives back at the house, muddy, exhausted but in high spirits. It had been a good day.

i just want to turn the lights on in these volatile times

Bellamy Blake becomes a revolutionary in the Kingdom of Ark because he has no other choice. He thought the worst thing that could happen to him was getting married to Clarke Griffin, the princess of Ark, but revolutions are never fair and you can never rely on allies like Diana Sydney.

Modern royalty/arranged marriage/revolution AU.

Also on AO3.

Part 1

Bellamy Blake doesn’t become a revolutionary because he wants to see his people bleed and die on the streets they call their own.

He becomes a revolutionary because there is no other option.

It is too late for his mother, only a matter of months before she passes away, but Bellamy doesn’t want to see his sister, his neighbors, his people sharing the same fate because no one dares to stand up to the regime.

If he had been a child infatuated with ideas of revolution and rebellion, he would have stopped being one as he watched a man die in front of his eyes for the very first time and he was unable to stop it.

He knows that they are using him. He is young, barely twenty-three and he is the perfect face for the posters they plaster across the kingdom.

“You look like revolution, baby,” his mother tells him, brushing away the curls falling into his eyes. “But it is no place for you.”

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Tranquility - Part 12

When Isii and Solas are captured by Templars, the Inquisitor can do little more than watch as the Rite of Tranquility is performed on her lover. But the Rite was never intended for a god. The Templars’ failure will change everything for both the Inquisitor and the man she once called Solas…
Read Part 1 here.

The heat inside the Venatori’s tent was oppressive, the heavy Tevinter drapery making it feel as though she were walking into an oven. The shade it provided from the harsh sun of the Wastes did little to stop trickles of sweat from trailing down the back of her neck. Isii wiped at her brow, pressing past the entrance as Bull followed, their latest “catch” struggling uselessly in his grip. Fen’Harel glanced up from the stack of missives he was sifting through, his face drawn with passive disinterest while Dorian lingered by the open tent flap.

“Last one,” Iron Bull muttered. “Hopefully he’s more helpful than the others. I’m happy to go take out another camp of these assholes, but it’s a hell of a lot easier to kill ‘em than to take them captive.”

Bull tossed the bound Venatori gracelessly into the sand. He sputtered, spitting grit from his lips as he pushed himself awkwardly to his knees. His hands were tied in front of him, balled into fists as he glared at his captors. “Your efforts here are useless,” he snapped defensively. “You may have taken our encampment by surprise, but you won’t find whatever it is you seek. Use whatever barbaric torture you Southerners like, we will never betray the Elder One.”

Isii’s hands moved onto her hips, her lips drawn tightly as she glanced to Bull and Dorian. “Tell the soldiers to start getting the others ready to transfer to base camp. Any one of them tries anything, you have my full permission to kill them.” She met the Venatori’s eyes as the two men retreated. “Personally, I don’t care if your comrades make it back to our cells at Skyhold. Sounds like more work than they’re worth.”

The mage’s eyes narrowed, his lips drawing back in a sneer. “When the Elder One ascends, he will return us to our glory. You and your people will be rattus once more. Knife-eared filth; little more than blood for our blades and offerings for our altars.”

Isii gave him a disinterested look, her brows lifting. “Charming,” she muttered. She glanced to Fen’Harel. “I assume you don’t mind if I gag him?” The Dread Wolf shook his head. She picked up a thick strip of cloth from the nearby table as the man looked at her, perplexed.

“What sort of fool interrogates someone who cannot speak?” he asked, scoffing.

“Who said anything about an interrogation?” Fen’Harel asked. He drew Dirthamen’s artifact from the table as Isii fixed the gag into place, being less-than-gentle in her application. She could see the man’s eyes grow wary, his uncertainty tinged with fear as he eyed the unfamiliar object. Fen’Harel knelt in front of him, taking hold of his wrist.

“This may take some time,” he said quietly, glancing over his shoulder.

“Find me when you’re done.” He gave a short nod and returned to his work, forcing the man’s hand onto the stone, the object humming into life as his eyes grew wide.

Isii didn’t linger any longer than she had to.

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7x06 Review (Just my thoughts)

1. I knew that Caroline and Alaric would be the ones together before watching the episode because my friend came on to fb chat to freak the fuck out about it to me and I was like, “Oh yeah not surprising. Tumblr came up with every possible theory like honestly GET ON TUMBLR.” Alaric and Caroline is just awkward no matter what plot device reason they’re using to put them together.

2. Stefan as a father is actually kind of the most adorable thing in the world and Paul really seemed to be into the scene, which just made it all the sweeter. Although I really don’t think he’d be saying “dad”, was it really that difficult for them to make him say “father”? LIKE COME ON. And I felt Stefan’s panic when he was looking for “Jacob” so that was actually quite well-done barring the “dad” issue.

3. I actually think when Stefan wakes up from his dream is a perfect example of TVD’s problem because Caroline is there and says, “Who’s Jacob? You were yelling his name…” except you don’t actually see/hear a dreaming Stefan call out Jacob’s name in his sleep and it’s like, even THAT, writers? Even that you can’t show and must tell??? 

4. Valerie interrupting Stefan and Caroline in a towel is pretty much exactly like when Elena came to visit Stefan in season 1 and ran into Lexi into a towel. Like I can’t even with that parallel. Although when Valerie says, “I should put some clothes on” and Caroline says, “Yeah. You do that.” I had to laugh because Candice delivered that line so well.  

5. Stefan telling Caroline to “just trust him” is ridiculous and a terrible way of appeasing her insecurity and actually just sounds like a brush off. He doesn’t even appear conflicted about whether or not he should tell her about Valerie’s secret, you don’t see him hesitate or search her expression and then sigh and decide to keep Valerie’s secret and he couldn’t even be like, “There are just some things I can’t tell you and I know that sucks but please, trust me” which would be a VERY Stefan thing to say. They aren’t meshing, it just isn’t working and from Candice’s interview, I can tell that the writers are doing this on purpose but WHY? They’re basically stripping away everything that makes Stefan a good boyfriend.

6. That makeout scene was awkward, I’m sorry. The way Stefan puts his hand on the couch, I think what should’ve happened is he should’ve put his arm around Caroline and pulled her closer to him so as to show some sort of security and THEN Caroline should’ve put her arms around his neck because the way it played out, it just looked like Caroline being way more into it than Stefan. And even when Stefan says, “I really like this form of manipulation…” I mean you could SHOW that. You could show Stefan getting really into it and whispering, “Don’t think I don’t know you’re manipulating me.” They just seem so stiff.

7. Bo AKA Mute Black Man Servant is just so blatantly offensive to me and I have no words.

8. Julian honestly just reminds me of a “older” Klaus and it’s wigging me out.

9. That Bonlaric phone call. How the hell is Alaric snappy at Bonnie because the soul they put into Jo isn’t actually Jo’s soul? That isn’t Bonnie’s fault. She didn’t want to do the damn spell in the first place so take care of your responsibilities, Alaric. And Bonnie’s whole “I can’t watch her because I have to go to Mystic Falls” or, writers, you could just allow her to say something like, “I have an exam that  I need to study for and I don’t want to get kicked out of school” and actually make her LIVE HER LIFE. And we STILL don’t know what Bonnie is studying. What year is she in? What does she want to do after college? For fuck’s sake.

10. I need to take a moment to appreciate how sexy Paul Wesley looks in a white collared shirt … … …. OK, moving on.

11. I don’t really know how I felt about the Valerie/Caroline scene wherein Valerie lets Caroline know that Stefan is withholding something from her because I thought it was a very pointed scene but at the same time I could buy the idea that Valerie assumed that Stefan would tell Caroline since she is his girlfriend. Eh, skipping over that.

12. I have to admit I;m enjoying the Defan dynamic this episode; Paul and Ian played well off of each other and it reminded me of season 3, of Stefan having a plan and being determined to execute it and Damon being like tralalalala Elena tralalalala why do you have a plan? tralalalala but what about my man pain over Elena? Although when they do that whole “furniture” bit, Stefan completely fucked that up by calling the furniture “psychotic”, it’s no longer a working metaphor now, guys.

13. Matt, you are officially irrelevant, which sucks because I would’ve utilized the hell out of you if I were a writer on this show.

14. All of you already know how I feel about the Bonenzo moment as they arrive to Lily’s house. Bonnie pretty much ignored Enzo’s existence and vice versa for two seasons and you expect me to believe that they’ll just be bantering at the door and Enzo would randomly say, “in case anyone asks, you’re my date”? The only way this would work is if the show established that Enzo is how Caroline was in season 1 or Rebekah in season 3 where he just clings to different women to get different things, like he was first obsessed with Caroline and when that didn’t work out, he moved on to Lily and that’s not working out so he’s moving on to Bonnie because she’s there but it turns out that he actually *feels* something for Bonnie and Bonnie calls him out on it (of course) otherwise, you’re just being like HERE. PUT THESE TWO TOGETHER. Of course, my way isn’t ideal either but there isn’t any character on the show right now that wanted Bonnie first because JP HAD to kill Kai.

15. Is there a reason why they can’t kill Bonnie and resurrect her five minutes later and Elena would just be NOT SLEEPING anymore?

16. Even the dynamic between Stefan and Damon and Julian is like the dynamic they had with Klaus. Am I the only one noticing this?

17. I have to address it, between Mute Man Servant Bo and the black maid we see when Stefan first enters the party and the black student who only received a C in Jo’s class to the black singer at Lily’s party, the subtle yet blatant and systemic misogynoir and anti-blackness of TVD is making my blood boil.

18. Last episode, Lily has this entire speech about how Julian made her better, how she could survive anything as long as she was with him (basically drawing parallels between herself and Julian and Damon and Elena) and LIKE Damon and Elena, I DON’T SEE IT. This episode should be a follow up on that, we should see what she sees/feels and THEN see the reality of the situation because all I’m seeing is Julian kissing Lily’s neck and her saying her family is complete. I don’t get what you SEE in him and part of what makes a villain horrifying is seeing how they can be with one person and how they are with others.

19. LOL at Bonnie glancing at Enzo who is glancing at Lily. IN. WHAT. WORLD.
And then she fixes his tie so she can help Enzo make Lily jealous? WHAT? OK, I won’t lie, when they stare at each other as she’s fixing his tie, it’s hot, it’s a sexy stare but it’s one of those things for me where the detail is one I enjoy but in the larger scheme of things it’s ridiculous because it’s SO transparent and manufactured and forced, it’s not a relationship or a dynamic that’s building naturally because the show didn’t give it enough time to evolve despite apparently knowing they wanted to do it since 6x21.And they make Bonnie clown Enzo for trying to make Lily jealous in the first place by having her say “It’s called dignity. You should have some, it’s free” and yet, Bonnie, you’re here with a nondate trying to make the woman he actually wants jealous because as a “date” it’s your job to do so? WHERE IS THE DIGNITY IN THAT? And then she smiles to herself as he says “have a nice night” and walks away? WHAT WAS THERE TO SMILE AT? It’s not like HE was the one adjusting something on you or moving your hair out of your face or zipping up your dress or something, you’re the one doing his tie, HE should be the one grinning. My GOD, these writers. This is why we need BonKai. Bonnie had all the emotional power in that relationship, Kai was determined to prove himself to her and they challenged each other.

20. At least they kill someone who isn’t black this episode. Jfc.

21. Guys, GUYS, it’s an actual scene in which Stefan and Damon discover that Lily “took over” Damon’s bedroom and because Bo and Julian were fencing earlier on in the episode, there are fencing swords in Damon/Lily’s bedroom and then Damon dangles Lily’s, his mother’s, panties from the edge of the sword and waves it in Stefan’s face who has to grab them and throw them to the side. WHY IS THIS A SCENE? WHY ARE WE MAKING THIS AS OEDIPAL AS POSSIBLE? It’s not enough that they both want to kill the father figure???? LIKE I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THAT WAS NECESSARY.

22. Another moment to appreciate Paul Wesley in an open-collared suit. … … … OK I’m done.

23. I also like how Stefan used the SAME trick to vervain Damon like he did in season 1. Like … you’re predictable, Damon.

24. Stefan, you had Julian where you wanted him, on fire, and then you WATCH as Lily runs forward and puts a blanket on him, like why couldn’t you have restrained her? I thought you had no love loss for your mother. Lord.

25. “What did I do to make you hate me so much?” Lily, you did abandon him as a child and then repeatedly chose your heretic family over him. Like I don’t think you’re as cold and badass as everyone on the show makes it seem but I think that warrants a reason why Stefan wouldn’t particularly like you.

26. Julian rambles on and on about how the Phoenix Stone is hell and how he’s going crazy. I WANT TO SEE IT. Him beating the shit out of Stefan and Damon isn’t proof of how he’d gone crazy considering that Stefan had just tried to kill him and he was already a violent man when he wasn’t trapped in the Phoenix Stone, that’s why Valerie lost her baby, so I’m bored.

27. I’m just gonna say it, when Julian throws that bloody stake at Stefan and he catches it just as it’s about to hit his face, that was hot. Stefan is just really hot this episode!

28. Dude, both of you got your asses kicked by one vampire. That is embarrassing. Oh, am I now supposed to believe that because he’s older, he’s stronger? Even though the show broke that rule repeatedly so Elena could always win her fights? Pfft.

29. LOL TO THE WRITERS WHO MADE DAMON SAY, “I’m surprised, Stefan. I thought Caroline was the one. Yet again we all thought Elena was the one…” because Elena WAS the one and IS the one but you just HAD to push DE down our throats even though they. don’t. work. I also wish there was more of a payoff when Stefan charges at Damon. He tells Damon not to start with him, I would like to see Stefan unravel and I would like to see him unravel on Damon because Damon kept pushing and pushing and pushing, especially since throughout the series, we’ve seen Damon unravel on Stefan.

30. Stefan lamenting how he could’ve been a father is a nice scene and I feel Stefan’s inner turmoil and his pain but its interesting he couldn’t tell this to Caroline, shes the person he’s meant to be able to tell everything and anything to. There’s a real disconnect there.

31. I don’t care about Damon moping about how he and Elena could’ve had a family because a) shut up b) that was never DE, that was SE c) Damon would make a TERRIBLE father.

32. LOL at the Gemini twins being transferred to Caroline. How exactly would babies grow in a body that is technically dead? Fine, writer,s fine. Fine. Moving away from that, I think it could be interesting to explore Steroline through the lens that Stefan is lamenting not having a family while Caroline is thrust with one that she didn’t ask for and the tensions that could arise from that. I just don’t think the show will do a good job in exploring it.


because tradition :)

anonymous asked:

Hi Ash! I am still fawning over the Richonne kiss. It was so Michonne to kiss Rick exactly like that. She knows what he needs. Her elegant hold of his face, and his reacharound to find his favorite place. We are being set up for a great love scene. These two warriors are so tender with each other. The best part was the forehead touch. Rick's mouth was open and he started to breath heavy. His ears were red! Lol. Michonne was calm as could be, breathing him in. She knows she will see him soon.

If you don’t preach this word! I’m trying to prepare myself for the inevitable sex scene, but if I’m still stuck like this on a 20-second kiss, I’m just not sure how I’m going to survive anything more. This show miraculously managed to craft a near-perfect romance between these two, with a slow burn that’s made every moment they share worth the wait. And it is going to kill me one day.

Guys did you hear?!  Scholastic apologized for their horribly sexist books

Many of you have expressed concerns about our How to Survive Anything titles, and we want to thank you for your passionate responses.

Publishing books is never easy, and even the best of us make mistakes.  In this case, our mistake was to take advice that could apply to anyone – of any gender – and suggest that only boys or girls should take it.  We recognize that society is at its best when everyone is able to live up to their full potential, regardless of what sex they were born into.

Boys can do anything.  They can make speeches, have crushes, deal with zits, babysit, and handle bullying.  Girls can do anything.  They can go whitewater rafting, mountain climbing, parachute diving, hiking in the woods, and explore space.  Children - regardless of gender - are full of potential.

Many of you noted that two books in our “How To Survive Anything!” series (“HOW TO SURVIVE ANYTHING! BOYS ONLY” and “HOW TO SURVIVE ANYTHING! GIRLS ONLY”) implied otherwise.  

For this, we are sincerely sorry.

These two titles have had very limited distribution to date, and no further copies will be made available.  We’ve asked Amazon to remove their product pages for these two books (one, two) and we’ll be asking our retailers to do the same, so that we don’t continue to profit from sexism.

In the future we may be reintroducing the books, but this time with more marketplace-appropriate titles (non-gendered, along the lines of “HOW TO SURVIVE: DISASTERS” and “HOW TO SURVIVE: SOCIETY”) - and don’t worry, zombie attacks will remain in both books!  We can never be too prepared, after all!

Again, we thank you for your feedback, and we will do better in the future.  We promise.

Oh wait, wait, no, I’m sorry.  That’s just what they should’ve said.  REALITY, COME ON DOWN, AND LET’S NOT USE PHRASES LIKE “WE WERE WRONG”, “WE APOLOGIZE”, “WE REGRET”, OR “WE’RE SORRY”:

Many readers have expressed concerns about our How to Survive Anything titles, and we want to thank you for your passionate responses. The two titles have had very limited distribution to date, and no further copies will be made available.

Please check out the many other titles kids can discover this summer on our summer reading booklists, available on our Summer Challenge page and our Pinterest boards.

Again, we thank you for your feedback. 

So yeah, turns out it’s not really sexism if you don’t sell that many copies?

I think it is good that they did eventually respond to the concerns (way better than their initial response, which was to simply retweet praise for some of the other books they publish) and it’s good that, even if they can’t see that anything was necessarily WRONG with a book called “HOW TO SURVIVE ANYTHING: GIRLS ONLY” with chapter headings like “How To Say You’re Sorry” that the boys don’t get, they can at least recognize market pressures when they see them.

But I really do think it’s too bad they couldn’t just publish these books without the stupid sexist theming and titles.  Edit them into one book and you’ve got a bunch of fun, largely fantasy survival themes mixed in with some real-life advice that lots of kids face on a day-to-day basis.

Unfortunately, that’s not the sort of book Scholastic seems interested in publishing. 

Story Element: Child Surviving Alone During Post-Apocalypse

Anonymous asked: Hi! I just wanted to start off by saying that your blog has helped me SO MUCH! :) Thank you! I just have a question about one of my characters and the credibility of his situation. My story is set in a post-apocalyptic world after a virus outbreak (zombies that are slowly re-developing lost skills such as climbing and swimming etc) My character Ben is 9 and has asperges syndrome, and I had planned for him to have been surviving on his own since the outbreak (it’s been about 3 months). Ben’s Asperges means he has a lot of trouble understanding social cues and he lacks empathy, however he is extremely smart and rational for his age. Do you think it is credible that he could have survived on his own for that long? He is not my MC but he is a character my MCs meet up with later, and I would like for him to have an interesting yet plausible back story :) Thank you so much!

  It’s possible, definitely, but I think the believability factor depends less on Ben’s Asperger’s and more on his situation. Surviving for three months in a post-apocalyptic situation is harder than it sounds. Here are some things you’ll need to consider:

1) Food and Water - the average 9 year old boy would need to consume about 2,000 calories of food and 8 cups of water per day to survive. For long-term survival (past a few weeks) he will need a balanced diet of protein, grain, fruits, and vegetables. To put that into perspective, that’s roughly this:

and this:

Every single day. In total, that’s 180,000 calories worth of food and 45 gallons of water over a three month period. That is a lot of food and water, and it will all have to be relatively fresh and free of contamination of any kind.

2) Food and Water Access - before Ben can consume all of that food and water, he’s going to need a source (or several) and access to that source (or sources). That source is going to have to be safe for him to access either repeatedly or in a place where he can safely stay long-term. Potential risks will be zombies, animals, and other survivors competing for what’s there. 

3) Kids are Terrible Eaters - unfortunately, even if you give Ben access to a whole convenience store worth of food, the average 9 year old is probably going to eat all the sugar and carbs long before he eats anything of even the vaguest nutritional value. After eating nothing but low-nutrition junk food loaded with sugar and salt for three months, Ben would probably not be doing too well by the time your MC finds him. At the very least he’ll be sluggish, both mentally and physically, and it’s possible a diet like that could have a negative impact on his Asperger’s, too.

So, how do you make it believable? For one thing, it would be helpful if you can put Ben in a rural convenience store or possibly a home where someone was prepping for whatever was to come, and for whatever reason never made it home after the apocalypse. It would be best if he found a safe hiding spot in that place (a root cellar, an attic, an old fallout shelter) where he could stash himself and a lot of food and water. This way, if anyone discovered his source, they wouldn’t necessarily find him or wipe out his whole supply.

Ideally, however, I think it would be best if you worked his hiding spot into his back story. Perhaps his parents were preppers and they instructed him on how to survive alone should anything happen to them. That would explain how he knows what to do, how he has safe access to food and water, and how he eats what he should and not just junk food. If his parents had built some sort of doomsday shelter, that could also explain how he could hide for so long without being discovered by others. There is a ton of information about “prepping” and survivalism available online to help you if you take that route.

As for his Apserger’s, that doesn’t have to factor in much if at all. Asperger’s is an Autism Spectrum Disorder, and being on the spectrum means that it’s different for everyone. Children with Asperger’s can lead totally normal lives, so make sure you read up on the disorder so that you can develop Ben accordingly.

I’m glad the site has been helpful. I hope this post will help you further. :)
Preference {1} How You Met (Part 2)

So…it was requested that I do a second part to my first preference ever, and I had fun with it, even though I’m not too happy with the writing…I hope you enjoy it, though, Lovelies! And requests are ALWAYS open, no matter how many I have left to do…Lol.

- Chrissy

Master List

Part 1

Harry: At a Signing.

                It had been two whole days since the signing, where Harry had given you his number. The ink had long since faded on your hand, but you had already put the contact into your phone.

                Now…you just had to call him.

                But all of your fears and doubts kept you from doing the thing most fans would have already done.

                For some reason, Harry had taken an interest in you, and you really didn’t want to mess this up.

                However, if you never called him…you wouldn’t take the opportunity that had presented itself to you. At least, if you called him, there was only a fifty percent chance that you would ruin it.

                You were about to take the plunge when you realized…you had no idea what to talk about.

                Sure, the beginning of any conversation was easy. All of the participants greeted each other and asked about their general well-being, but what comes after that?

                Small talk and getting to know the person.

                You didn’t know what questions to ask or topics to bring up.

                This was your celebrity crush that you were calling!

                They don’t write “How To” books on that!

                This was a special case; you had gotten lucky.

                So you owed it to the rest of the One Direction fan population to do this.


                You swallowed back the nerves and managed to utter, “Hi, Harry. Um…this is the girl from the signing the other day…the one you gave your number to?”

                There was a brief silence on the line, and you were worried that he had forgotten about you, that he didn’t know who the Hell was calling him on his personal cell.

                “Oh, yeah! I remember you,” his cheerful voice brought a smile to your once worried face. “I never got your name, though.”

                “I’m Y/N,” you replied, leaning back into the pile of pillows on your bed.

                “Well, it’s nice to finally hear from you, Y/N! How are you?”

                “I’m doing well, thanks for asking. How are you doing?” you bit your bottom lip.

                He sighed, “Just a bit tired. We had a long day today, and there weren’t any pretty girls coming up to me and offering coffee, you know?”

                You blushed and let out a giggle at his compliment, “Well, I’m sorry. I can’t always be there to bring you Starbucks.”

                Harry laughed, “I suppose you’re right. Too bad, though. Seeing you would’ve brightened my day a bit.”

                It took everything you had not to roll around on your bed and squeal. Harry was flirting with you, and to think you almost didn’t call him!

                “Speaking of which, why don’t you and I meet up again? I’m free tomorrow evening, if that’s an okay time for you.”

                Part of you was dying to scream, “Yes!”

                And another part reminded you that you could barely bring yourself to start a conversation with the British hottie. How were you supposed to survive anything longer?

                “Y/N? You still there?” Harry’s voice broke you from your thoughts. “If you can’t make tomorrow, we could always go the following day…”

                “No!” you shouted a little too loudly. “I mean…uh…I’m free tomorrow night.”

                “Great!” his voice was almost as deafening as yours. “We can meet up in the mall at about sixteen o'clock, if that’s okay with you?”

                “That’s fine, but isn’t the mall pretty crowded?” you pointed out, frowning at the idea of girls chasing you through the stores.

                “I’ll be in disguise,” he whispered with a chuckle. “Just give me a call when you arrive, and I’ll come find you.”

                “Sounds good,” you agreed, a smile making its way onto your face.

                “Well, until then, Love. Have a good night.”

                “You, too, Harry, and thank you.”

                “For what?”

                “For inviting me out,” you laughed, sitting up on your knees.

                “Oh…well, thanks for agreeing to go with me!”

                “No problem. Bye, Harry.”

                You hung up the phone, practically glowing from the conversation you had just had.

                Maybe tomorrow wouldn’t be so hard after all…

Liam: At the Supermarket.

                “Well, now that I’m done shopping, where would you like to go?” you asked, giving Liam a warm smile. “There are a few restaurants down the street, if you don’t mind walking a little bit.”

                “I don’t mind,” he chuckled, strolling beside you as you made your way out of the market’s parking lot. “Besides, I’m treating you, remember?”

                You nodded, “I do remember, but if you’re paying, I’d feel better if we chose a place you liked.”

                “That’s going to be hard,” he grinned at you. “This is my first time in this town, so I’ve never eaten at any of the places here.”

                “Well,” you turned around, walking backwards in front of him, “I have been to most of these restaurants a handful of times, so all you have to do is tell me what you feel like eating.”

                He smirked at you, “So you’re a restaurant expert?”

                “I guess you could say that,” you grinned. “So what will it be? Italian? Mexican? Lebanese?”

                “How about a pub?” he suggested, grabbing your arm and stopping you from hitting a lamp post. “Careful, Love.”

                You turned pink but still managed mumble a “Sorry.”

                “It’s okay,” his lips stretched into a crooked grin. “I just didn’t want to see someone so pretty get hurt.”

                Now, you were nearly red from his flattery.

                “So…” you tucked a strand hair behind your ear as you walked beside him, “you want Irish food?”

                “Closest thing to home,” he glanced at you. “Are there any good ones around here?”

                “Yes. A few blocks down. It’s called The Grasshopper. It’s a great place,” you began to ramble on. “They decorated it like an old, stone pub you’d see in the Irish countryside, and the food is to die for. I used to go there all the time when I was–” you cut yourself off once you met his brown-eyed gaze. There was laughter in those eyes, and you wondered if you had managed to make a fool of yourself again. “I’m so sorry…I got carried away…”

                You looked away after you had said that, hoping to hide your mortification.

                “You didn’t get carried away,” Liam whispered, taking your hand in his for a split second to bring your stare back to him. “I thought it was cute the way you went on about the place. Seeing you get all excited kind of made me look forward to this even more than I already was.”

                You felt your cheeks warm at his words, “Really?”

                He grinned, “But the way you look right now is even cuter.”


                “That was some of the best Irish cuisine I’ve had in a long time, and I’ve traveled the world,” Liam chuckled as you two exited the dimly-lit pub.

                “I told you their food was to die for.”

                “Well, now I know I can trust you with choosing restaurants.”

                You looked up at him, arching a brow, “Just restaurants?”

                He laughed, shaking his head, “I guess I could trust you with choosing your company. I mean, I am quite an awesome guy.”

                You rolled your eyes at him, but his goofy smile was contagious, “Well, I can’t really argue with that.”

                He stopped laughing when you had said that, making you rethink your words.

                “Really?” he asked, pausing in the middle of the sidewalk.

                Still a bit uncomfortable by the sudden change of mood, you had trouble meeting his gaze, “Well…yeah. You helped me out at the store…and paid for my dinner. You’re really nice, Liam, and you’re funny. I can’t stop smiling when I’m with you, and you’re really smart…”

                “Okay, Y/N. That’s enough,” he chuckled. “You’re making me blush, but I have to admit that I had a great time with you too.”

                It was your turn to blush, “Oh…well…”

                Your stammering stopped when you felt a feathery soft touch on your cheek and something being pushed into your hand.

                Liam drew back from your face, beaming, “Call me. I’d love to do this again.”

Louis: In a Bar.

You didn’t know why it bothered you so much.

                It felt like the first time a guy had asked for your number and never called you. The rejection was painful, especially after it took you a week to realize you were never going to get that call.

                With Louis, it only took you four days, but your heart still ached. You were a One Direction fan from the beginning, and he was always your favorite. It was nice to finally meet him, but he was still a stranger. You had only talked to him for a few minutes, and he was just dumped by his girlfriend. Honestly, what did you expect?

                You kept telling yourself these negative words until you parked your car in front of Gilligan’s.

                Why did you come here?

                You had your hopes up, even though you knew you shouldn’t, but the idea was too beautiful to pass up.

                You’d walk into the bar and see him at the counter, whiskey in hand, but this time, he wouldn’t be trying to drink away his sorrows.

                It sounded so good, and it turned out to be too good to be true because…

                Louis wasn’t there.

                “Hey, Y/N,” Jacob welcomed you with a large grin. “You’re a little earlier than usual.”

                You shrugged, leaning on the bar, “I didn’t really have much to do today.”

                “No?” Jacob furrowed his ginger brows. “That’s not like you, Y/N.”

                You scoffed, your lips curving into a sarcastic smile, “I haven’t exactly been myself lately.”

                “Boy trouble?”

                You rolled your eyes at him and hit his arm playfully, “Shut up.”

                “Ah!” he pointed at you, chuckling. “There it is. There’s the genuine grin.”

                You tried to hide it, but it was no use. Jacob just had a way about him that could make anyone smile.

                “So, what boy is bugging you?” he asked, picking up a glass from underneath the bar. “Your dad and I will go beat him up for you.”

                “No. No,” you shook your head. “It’s not his fault…”

                “Y/N, if there is one thing I know about boys,” he began, scooping some of your favorite ice cream in the glass, “it’s that it’s always their fault.”

                “Yeah?” you chuckled, watching him move to the large mixer behind him. “Then you don’t know much about boys.”

                He threw his head back in laughter and pressed the button on the machine, “Always have to have the last word, don’t you? Even when I’m making your favorite drink?”

                “I never said you had to serve milkshakes at your bar,” you sat up on one of the stools.

                “But you visit your boring, old godfather,” he said, putting the shake in front of you, “so I should have something to keep you coming around.”

                You smiled at him before taking a sip, “Thanks, Jacob.”

                “No problem.”

                While you consumed your drink, the door opened and closed behind you with a bang.

                “Back again?” Jacob’s voice sounded.


                “Well, you’re lucky this time,” Jacob snorted, gesturing to you. “She just got in.”

                You looked over your shoulder at the man who entered the bar. He looked different this time around. He was cleanly shaven and wearing some tidier clothes, but his teal eyes revealed that he was still tired and hurting.

                “Hello, Louis,” you smiled, turning around in your chair to face him fully.

                “I’m sorry I didn’t call,” Louis frowned, unable to meet your gaze. “I lost your number…I was drunk, and I guess I misplaced it…”

                You laughed at his mistake, feeling the relief wash down on you as cold and refreshing as the ice cream in your glass.

                “It’s okay, Louis,” you managed in between laughs, “I forgive you.”

                He let out a sigh, letting his shoulders relax as he walked over to you, “I’ve been back here every night since I met you, but Jacob doesn’t know your new number and…”

                You smiled at him, “Well, I’m here now, and this time, you can give me your number.”

Niall: In Your Hometown.

“I’m really sorry, Y/N,” Niall sighed as he brought you backstage. “I tried getting you the best seats, but all our tickets have been sold out for a while…”

                “It’s okay, Niall,” you assured him with a smile. “I’m lucky I’m even here!”

                Niall frowned, “But I should’ve been able to get you a good seat…Unfortunately,” he pulled back the curtain, revealing a crowded stadium and empty stage, “this is the best view I can give you.”

                You honestly couldn’t believe this was happening. You were at a One Direction concert, backstage with your celebrity crush, and you hadn’t paid a cent.

                You had to be dreaming.

                “Believe me, you aren’t dreaming,” Niall laughed, making you realize that you had said your last thought out loud.

                “But…this is so…” you shook your head, staring out at the blinding lights and screaming fans.

                “I know,” Niall followed your gaze, a wide smile lighting up his whole face. “That’s how I feel every time I get out on stage.”

                You looked at him, trying to keep his expression, right now, in this moment, carved into your memory.

                He caught you, though, causing a blush to bloom on your cheeks.

                “Come on,” he said with a lop-sided grin, “I should let the boys know you’re here.”

                You nodded, following him away from the curtains and towards the dressing rooms. He knocked on the first door and put his hands into his pockets, waiting for an answer.

                “Who is it?” Louis’ voice came from the other side.

                “It’s me. Open up.”

                “Patience, young one,” the door opened to reveal a shirtless, smirking Louis, but when he saw you, his whole face converted to utter shock. However, as quickly as the surprise came, it faded, and into an expression that could only be described as devious. “Boys! Niall’s brought us a little guest.”

                “Louis…” Niall narrowed his eyes at him, “what are you up to…?”

                “Oh, nothing,” he grinned, grabbing your wrist and pulling you into the room.

                The first thing you noticed when you gained you footing was that the three other members of your favorite boy band were half naked.

                “Y/N!” they all shouted except for Harry, who happened to be chowing down on some Chinese Takeout.

                “Hi, Y/N,” Harry said with a full mouth.

                “You remember me…” you whispered without thinking, causing Louis to throw his head back in laughter.

                “How could we forget you?” Louis asked, putting an arm around your shoulders. “Niall’s been talking about you non-stop.”

                “Shut the fuck up, Louis!” Niall’s hiss came from behind you. You turned to see him glaring at everyone in the room, including Lou, who was silently doing Harry’s hair. “Why are you guys naked?”

                “For the record, Niall,” Liam put a finger in the air while trying to slip on his pants with one hand, “you didn’t tell us you had a girl with you…much less Y/N. So we had no idea that our state of undress would be a problem.”

                “Lou! Say something to these arses!” Niall shouted.

                She shrugged her shoulders, “Honestly, Niall, they wouldn’t listen to me anyway.”

                He let out a groan before grabbing your wrist and pulling you out of the room.

                “I’m really sorry about that,” he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he led you back towards the stage. “I didn’t know…”

                “Niall,” you chuckled, putting your hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay. I’m not bothered by it.”

                “You aren’t?” he asked, his blue eyes widening.

                “Niall, I just saw my idols half naked. Do you think I’m angry?” you asked with a straight face.

                Niall laughed, “I guess not…I kind of forgot you were a fan for a second…but you didn’t see all your idols naked,” he smirked at you.

                “Sorry, Niall, but when it comes to seeing my celebrity crush naked, there needs to be a few dates first,” you joked, winking at him.

                “Alright. We’ll have our second tomorrow, fifteen o'clock,” he smiled. “I’ll pick you up then.”

Zayn: At a Hotel.

                Minutes later, you were in the pool area.

                Seeing as it was nearly midnight, the place was deserted, leaving you and Zayn to do whatever you pleased.

                “This is great!” you shouted, looking up at the night sky through the glass ceiling.

                Zayn laughed at your excitement, causing you to turn around to face him. He was currently taking off his shirt, pulling the thin, white t-shirt over his head while flexing his muscular arms.

                “What?” he asked, bringing you out of your daze.

                “Huh…? Oh…” you quickly turned away, trying to hide your blushing cheeks.

                Zayn walked passed you, stepping onto the first stair that led into the pool. He twisted around and stared at you, “Aren’t you coming?”

                You suddenly were very aware of the fact that you were wearing a bikini underneath your black cover up. You were insecure about your body sometimes, and when your idol was looking at you, waiting for you to join him in the pool, you kind of felt a little bit on the spot.


                Zayn gave you a warm smile, “If you want, I’ll look away.”

                Were you that obvious?

                Zayn went onto the second step, turning his back to you, “I’m not looking…”

                You shrugged off your cover up and looked down at your white bikini that, now that you were going to be swimming with Zayn Malik, seemed a bit too revealing. You weren’t always this skinny, and your body had little marks to remind you.

                You hugged yourself and entered the water behind Zayn.

                “Finally decided to join me…?” he trailed off, his eyes growing wide as they checked you out.

                You shuffled your feet uncomfortably, not used to being under a gaze as intense as Zayn’s.

                “You’re beautiful,” he said, moving his eyes from your skin to your face. “I mean it.”

                You couldn’t keep your mouth from curving upward into a small grin, “Than–”

                “Cannon ball!”

                “Louis! They were having a moment!” Harry shouted once Louis had resurfaced, whipping his wet hair across his forehead.

                “Hey, guys!” he gasped as he swam over to you.

                “Hi…” Zayn murmured, frowning at the interruption.

                “I tried to stop him, Zayn,” Harry said, shrugging off his shirt. “I really did.”

                Zayn just shrugged before turning back to you, “Do you want to swim…or would you mind joining me in the hot tub?”

                “Um…actually…” you leaned forward, whispering into his ear, “I’d rather get revenge.”

                Zayn’s face brightened as he nodded in agreement, “Sounds good to me.”

                “Would you two lovebirds like to share with the rest pool?” Louis asked, popping up beside you.

                “Yes, actually,” Zayn smirked, putting his hands on Louis’ shoulders. “Drown, Louis!”

                “Wha–” Louis was cut off by the water entering his mouth as Zayn dunked him under.

                The room filled with laughter, and when Louis came up, spitting out the highly chlorinated water, you swear you couldn’t breathe.

                “That wasn’t nice at all!” Louis exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair.

                “You deserved it,” Zayn said, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Come on, let’s go enjoy the hot tub.”

                “Sounds like fun!” Louis said, climbing the stairs behind you.

                “Too bad you aren’t invited,” Zayn said over your shoulder.

                “Sorry, Louis!” you said as Zayn led you away.


                “Well, I think that was the most fun I’ve had all day,” Zayn remarked as he settled down in the burning water. “Thanks for the idea, Y/N.”

                “No problem,” you sighed, leaning your head back against the blue tile.

                You both sat there in a comfortable silence, just enjoying the tub and each other’s quiet company.

                “Y/N?” Zayn whispered your name, bringing you back from the brink of sleep.

                “Hmm?” you opened your eyes.

                “Do you think…we could meet up for breakfast tomorrow?” he avoided your gaze, finding the broken tile next to him fascinating.

                You smiled, “I’d love to, but…I’m warning you. I’m not much of a morning person.”

                Zayn laughed, “Don’t worry about that, Love. I’m not either.”

lysapadin replied to your post:*ROLLS AROUND*

Sam, his pet assholes, and the kitten. (what kitten? I don’t know, you tell me.)



anyway so sam is like, wow you really like the cat don’t you and Bucky is like “I am literally terrified I will like do something terrible to it accidentally” and sam is like, no, no, this is good, we can cat sit, this will be therapy and shit

steve, by the way, does not particularly care for cats, like they’re there or whatever but tbh his cat meter is completely filled by being around tony stark

so sam arranges to be cat foster parents to  see how it goes and bucky one hundred thousand million billion trillion quintillion percent loses his shit and also the plot and spends three weeks waking up every two hours to syringe milk into this tiny kitten’s gullet and steve is like “im honestly kind of having creepy flashbacks to the winter of 1934″ and sam is like “jesus fucking christ I’m terrified to ask how you ever survived anything ever” and steve is like, “hint: you see that sad runt kitten buck is cleaning the ass of? Yup.”

and then bucky raises ALL the kitten successfully and then he’s like “I should let it go to good home :<<<<<” and natasha is like “you fuckin idiot” and that’s how natasha gets a cat named Cat