how-do-people-do-these-so-easily

anonymous asked:

How do you understand life and people and emotions so well? Is it all through mbti or do you also apply your own experiences? How do I become so emotionally intelligent myself?

No, it is not only MBTI, I have studied a wide range of subjects in depth, formally and informally. MBTI is just a convenient shorthand I use to explain concepts to people in a way that they can more easily understand. As for emotional intelligence, it is not an easy thing to improve to a high level because emotions are weaved into much of our cognitive system, making it extremely difficult to view them objectively, sort of like asking a person to look at their own retina. The psyche has many layers and just when you think you’ve discovered the truth about yourself, you’ll find that there is another layer underneath. Emotional intelligence involves: knowing what emotions are and their role within your psychology, being aware of emotions as they arise, understanding the source of emotions, understanding how emotions influence your judgments about the world and other people, and developing strategies for managing negative emotions.

Function-wise, you should develop your four functions to the point where you can reflexively disperse negative emotional energy in productive ways rather than allowing emotional “clots” to build up in the psyche. Those emotional blockages produce significant psychological barriers for you to overcome on top of whatever else is happening to you, thus, managing them better produces greater emotional resiliency, freeing up mental energy to do other things. Different types have different strengths if they are functioning normally, for instance, Ts are good technical problem solvers and Fs are good with handling people; however, reverse their roles and their respective coping limitations will become obvious. I’ve seen countless examples of people who are so confident that they have developed a function and then those delusions crack very easily once the right emotional button is pushed. Becoming aware of those buttons is the difficulty and that is what emotional intelligence is really about, building depth of self-awareness. A lot of people instinctively believe that avoiding or shielding the buttons is the right strategy but actually, the more you try to shield them from yourself or others, the more you attract situations that press on them. Each type travels a somewhat different path of development but, generally speaking, developing the lower functions requires a lot of time and effort because the rewards are not immediately obvious and complacency is often a more powerful force but, in the process of developing, your emotional intelligence will grow organically because the key to both processes is improving self-awareness.

“Self-realization cannot be attained by intellect or rationality alone.” - Abraham Maslow

“How is your spiritual life going?”  

I used to answer this question by looking at the state of my devotional activities: Did I pray and read the Bible enough today? The problem is that by this measure the Pharisees always win. People can be very disciplined, but remain proud and spiteful. How do we measure spiritual growth so that the Pharisees don’t win?  

I asked a wise man, “How do you assess the well-being of your soul?”  

He immediately said, “I ask myself two questions”:    

  • Am I growing more easily discouraged these days?   
  • Am I growing more easily irritated these days?  

At the core of a flourishing soul are the love of God and the peace of God. If peace is growing in me, I am less easily discouraged. If love is growing, I am less easily irritated. 

It was a brilliantly helpful diagnostic to assess the health of my soul.

- John Ortberg, The Me I Want to Be

I don’t trust easily because every time I attempt to, I’m shown that people aren’t trustworthy. Some people lie and casually do what they want to do - irregardless of how it will effect others. So, I just stick to having low expectations with new people in my life and continue to put my trust into my long term friendships, because they have never failed me or made me second guess ever. I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m completely content with my long term friendships, I don’t need any more. If new people continue to flow into my life, I will keep them at bay.

Until Dawn RP Ask Meme
  • Chris:Are you a good friend?
  • Josh:Do you forgive easily?
  • Sam:Do you like nature?
  • Emily:How would you hold up in survival situations?
  • Mike:Are you trustworthy?
  • Matt:Are you loyal?
  • Jess:Are you confident in yourself?
  • Ashley:How smart do you consider yourself?
  • Hannah:What was your most humiliating moment?
  • Beth:Would you risk your life for the people you love?
  • Melinda:How do you feel about children?
  • The Psycho:What would it take for you to snap?
  • The Stranger:Do you trust strangers?
  • Dr. Hill:What are you afraid of?
  • Billy Bates:What do you crave?
  • Makkapitew:What are your demons?
  • Wendigo!Josh:What happens when you lose yourself?
  • Tristan:What does family mean to you?
  • Jacob:Do you have any siblings? What's your relationship with them?

Hello Neira. ( blog link ) I see you liked my theme so much that you decided to rip off every aspect of it for yourself. Maybe you wouldn’t have gotten caught if my style wasn’t easily recognisable and immediately noticed by my friends and followers alike. But then you obviously didn’t care about being called out, seeing as how you ripped off the entire blog design so blatantly.

Well, let’s just do a quick overview of the obvious first. My blog is the one on the left. The thief’s blog is the one on the right. Notice anything? If your answer was everything, then you’d be correct! But it goes even deeper than this.

Not did you completely rip off the design of my blog theme, but you also went as far as to copy my css and style for the pages as well. And when I decided to approach you about it privately, you decided to respond to me in the following fashion:

First of all not only are you a thief, but you’re also a liar. You didn’t code anything by yourself. Wanna know why? Here is A LINK TO THE BASE CODE for the theme I’m using. And HERE IS WHAT THE BASE CODE LOOKS LIKE if you use it without any edits. It looks nothing like mine. This further proves that you stole the code and css modifications directly from my blog more than the obvious by the way it looks identical to mine in every way. You were not ‘inspired’ by my blog, you stole everything on it. And you excuse your behaviour by saying I’m not active enough? And I only roleplay with my ship partners? What kind of ludicrous excuse is that?

And your complete disregard for your despicable behaviour is the worst of all. You’re not remorseful in any sense of the word. You’re PROUD of what you’ve done and don’t care who it’s hurt or anything. And that’s just sad. Remove my work from your blog and leave me alone. This is ridiculous. This type of behaviour is not acceptable. Remove my stuff now.

ofalarger-infinity asked:

Do you have any tips or advice for finding covens?

I do! 

The first thing I have to say about finding a Coven (be it online or local) that you have to get involved with your community. While this post isn’t coven specific the first step to finding a working coven is finding like minded individuals with whom you easily mesh. 

Now that you’ve found them…what do you do? Well, start talking. Let people know you are interested in being in a coven. Don’t be upset or discouraged if no one immediately invites you to join theirs. Covens tend to happen really naturally and have a sort of balance that can be disrupted with new members. So, they’ll take time. 

Also, you can always make one of your own. Once you get some pagan friends together start asking them over for holidays, see how you guys work together on sabbats, then ask about getting together for a pagan study group once a month. A coven emerges easily from this. 

SO I guess my biggest advice is…don’t force it. A coven is a very fragile thing in the beginning and too much too fast can ruin it. 

Also: A warning. 

Let me tell you about a really uncomfortable thing that happened. When I was about 18 I moved in with the person I would eventually marry. My one day mother in law and sister in law found my religion fascinating and wanted to know more. We started going to classes together as a group and created a tiny three person coven together for holidays. 

It was pretty enjoyable. 

Then, and I’m not sure how. My future sister in law stumbled across a guy who said we could join his coven. It seemed like a fun idea at first, joining something larger than our little three person group. However, about a month of him coming over he started talking about how he had been practicing since birth as his mother was a fellow practitioner and that my sister in law had a very old spirit. He started paying a LOT of attention to her. Keep in mind that she is monogamously married and that her husband was based overseas at the time.

Red flags in retrospect. 

This guy then said that all of their rituals were skyclad (nude) and we expressed that we weren’t super comfortable with that. There is nothing wrong with nudity, we just didn’t feel any closer to the earth naked than in clothes. He persisted. He also said that there was the seven-fold-kiss. 

A thing I have heard of only once since. 

A seven-fold-kiss is where one person in a group kisses each of the places in a seven-fold prayer. There are several versions of a seven fold prayer, some are even biblical in origin but the one I know and use goes like this:  

Blessed be my feet that walk the sacred path
Blessed be my knees that kneel upon the sacred altar
Blessed be my groin (sometimes womb) that creates life
Blessed be my breast, and the heart beneath that beats true
Blessed be my throat, may it draw the breath of life
Blessed be my lips, that they speak only the truth
Blessed be my brow, my third eye,May I be worthy of its insight

There are many variations, this is the one I know. Now this dude, who we’d only known a little while was telling my monogamously married sister in law that preforming this was part of being in their coven. Yeah, we were not okay with this. 

Note: I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with a coven who utilizes being skyclad or practicing a seven-fold-kiss. But making it a prerequisite was not cool. Especially when he continued to bother her after she said she wasn’t interested. 

So, I guess the other thing I’m saying is be careful and take it slow. 

Drabble Game

Drabble Game #8 “No I didn’t fall in love with you just to lose you” Peter Pan

  It will never not amaze me just how easily you can underestimate people. Take, for example, how easily myself and the rest of the lost boys underestimated the Story Brooke gang. We let ourselves get to comfortable and it cost us. It cost us big time. With out even trying they managed to get all our lost boys tied up, Peter was off doing god knows what leaving me to try and save the damn lost boys.

  “So all I need to do is get the one handed pirate and fairy out of the way, then I can free the lost boys and go find Peter.”

  “You know you might want to plan things out in your head.” A voice yelled out from behind. I let out a groan and turned around to face the one hand pirate himself.

 “Look just let have the lost boys and we can all go on our marry way.”

  “Your fighting for Pan. He wants to kill Henry.”

  “I am fully aware of what he wants to do. I also know that it is the only way to live forever with him.”

  “And your okay with killing a child?”

  “I have seen the way you look at her, at Emma. You love her. So let me ask you this. If the only way to spend the rest of your lives together was to kill a child you never met. Would you have done it.”

  “No. No I would never do that because I know that a single life time with her would be more than enough.” He replied. “Now come along, lets go see you little friends.” I rolled my eyes at him, but listened, walking over to where my my lost boys were tied up. As I entered the clearing, Felix let out a groan, all hope falling from his face.

  “Well boys we have truly lost.” He sighed, giving me a lop sided smile when I shook my head. To Tink and Hook it looked like my giving up, but Felix knew what it was. It was me letting him know that I had a plan.

  “Sit.” Hook ordered, waving to the spot beside Felix. I moved to act like I was in fact going to sit down beside Felix before I lunged. My plan was to through Hook to the ground, to give Felix a chance to free himself, but I forgot one tiny thing. The arm he raised to defend himself, didn’t have a hand at the end, but a hook. A hook that buried itself deeply into my chest.

  “You silly girl.” He moaned, his good arm wrapping around my waist to hold me tightly against him. Tink ran to his side, trying to figure out what to do to save me.

  “Felix!” I moaned out, gasping for breath but only coughing up blood.

  “Pan! PAN THE PIRATE KILLED Y/N!” He screamed out, knowing that I wanted to Peter, and that he would come the moment he heard out I was dying. He was right, Peter appeared by my side, his eyes racking over my body as I shook from the pain, blood spattering onto the pirates white shirt.

  “Give her to me. I can protect her, I can save her.” Peter demanded, his voice shaking from unshed tears. Killian waited only for a second before nodding, turning me so he could push me into Peter`s chest. He waited for only a second before pulling his hook from my chest, the movement causing me to cough up even more blood.

  “Take her away from here, away from me.” He sighed, cupping the side of my face. “I have never been more sorry. I promise this is not what I wanted.”

  “Peter.” I groaned, sagging against his grasp. Peter whispered something into my ear, holding me tighter as we disappeared in a puff of green smoke. Once we were at his thinking tree, he knelt to ground gathering me tightly into his arms.

  “No I didn’t fall in love with you just to lose you.” He sobbed, racking his hand down my cheek. “I`ll fix you my love. I promise.” He whispered, running his hand over my wound. Green magic washing from his palms and over me.

  “Pan?” Emma said from the other side, Peter screaming in annoyance.

  “Go away I need to save her.” He snapped, his eyes and hands never once leaving me.

  “You have my sons heart.” She sighed.

  “And I need to save the love of my life! I need to save her!” He screamed, his voice panicking as I started to cough up more and more blood.

  “Emma, I know he has Henry`s heart, but we need to let him save her.”

  Peter`s P.o.v

 “It`s to late. She`s already gone. No amount of magic can bring back the dead.” Regina said softly.

  “No.” I moaned, pulling Y/n against my chest.

 “Peter?” Emma said softly, walking forward to kneel in front of me.

  “Go away.” I moaned, hugging her body closer to me. Before she could respond I pulled up my green smoke, willing myself and my love to be anywhere but near the people who ended her life.

I am SO FUCKING TIRED of reading posts that say “real self care is getting yourself out of bed, eating properly, cleaning yourself, making yourself go to work, and getting enough sleep” and shit like that.

I don’t understand how people can think this is something we’re not aware of?? Do you really think that mentally ill people are unaware that eating and sleeping are important? Do you really think that we’re floating through life blissfully unaware, with no idea about what it means to take care of our basic needs?

We know. We fucking know. You’re not some enlightened genius spreading some incredible knowledge to us. The point is that when you’re struggling with mental illness, it’s fucking hard

We only have so much energy. A lot of us get drained/overstimulated/overwhelmed very easily, because we’re struggling with a bunch of other issues on top of our basic needs. When I reach that point of critical mass when I no longer have the spoons to do things, saying “HEY ASSHOLE, DO MORE THINGS!” is not going to fucking help me.

And that is the POINT of “cutesy self care” or “tumblr self care” or whatever you want to call it. They’re things to help us recharge, destress, and get some spoons back. “Cutesy” self care is what makes it possible for us to take care of “real” self care.

Seriously, what the fuck is this idea that if you’re mentally ill, the only things you’re allowed to consider important are your basic needs?

And why are these posts always written in such an aggressive tone, I wonder? Why are they always like “Self care is about getting off your LAZY FUCKING ASS AND ACTUALY DOING SOMETHING FOR ONCE, YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT?”

You aren’t fooling anyone.

incredits asked:

How do you feel about Root/Shaw? And Shaw in general?

This whole sequence of events with Shaw’s cover being blown and Root doing everything in her power to protect her. So great.

Root confronting Shaw’s flippant attitude about not being scared when she should be and that there are people who care about her and to remember that, was amazing because Root doesn’t scare easily. But she was so worried and it’s one of the few times that she’s spoken to Shaw without that added layer of sweetness on top. Since when is Root the serious one of the two? That’s just how much Sameen’s safety means to her because it is not a fucking joke. AND SHAW’S REACTION. So telling, the guilt written all over her face for not realising that she’s no longer that lone wolf soldier she was for so many years, and that people are absolutely counting on her to come home. AHHHH.

I loved that Root played Shaw in order to keep her safe, and not really caring about the consequences because it really doesn’t matter to her whether or not Shaw will still like her when she wakes up as long as she’s still breathing.

Root will always choose Shaw being angry at her than Shaw being dead. SORRY SAMEEN. You can end her all you want. <– which by the way, how does Amy Acker still manage to turn that into an overt come on.

SHAW IN GENERAL?

“Soy milk? I can’t stand the stuff. Go cow, or go home.”

Such a fucking Ron Swanson.

Go cow, or go home.

My freezer cooking post

So, when I decided I wanted to do a big freezer cooking day to have meals for post partum, I did a lot of research. I wanted meals that I didn’t have to do any pre cooking for and that I could just thaw and put in the crock pot and walk away. I also wanted to be able to store them easily.

In my research, I found loads of Pinterest posts about this very thing. And I read thorough them and found that most of them had the reasons why the poster was doing it, and how they did it, but the links to the recipes and grocery lists were links to peoples books or pdf filed you had to pay for. I am extremely cheap and didn’t want to do that, so my husband and I set out to find our own no pre cooking crock pot meals. We did that, made our own grocery list and set forth. So, if anyone else is wanting to do this and doesn’t want to pay for other peoples grocery lists, this post is for you. All the recipes used here came from AllRecipes.com. @pregnantinplaid, I know you don’t eat red meat, but a lot of these can be modified to replace with chicken. So, here we go.

Keep reading

Writing scenarios on tumblr is supposed to be for fun. We do it because we have free time and want to share our content with people who enjoy the same thing we do. If you come across blogs attempting to make you buy them something from Amazon just so they’ll write you some shitty 3,000 word scenario when you could easily get better quality content for FREE from other bloggers who don’t do this for money, do not buy them anything. I don’t care if they have some shitty sob story, bribery is not okay. Please do not endorse those kinds of blogs. They’re an embarrassment to our community.

8bitcat asked:

do you normally leave your friend tickets attached to your pritickets? or do you prefer to snap off the friend ticket immediately after you get it?

Snap it immediately haha. They wouldn’t fit in my PriTicket file bag otherwise..!

Besides, how else am I supposed to have them ready to trade with people. I keep my friend tickets in a separate pouch so that if someone asks to trade I can easily hand it to them and let them pick. (The anime way isn’t really practical unless you’ve both finished a game at the same time and you’re trading those specific tickets? Haha.)

Also, it may be a gatcha item like an accessory at the top, and it wouldn’t make sense to keep a random accessory attached to a coorde it doesn’t match with.

(People who got still attached tickets in my giveaway, that was because I purposely saved some with gatcha items I didn’t want because I figured you would appreciate it hehe.)

anonymous asked:

People aren't mad at the Fines for "being more corporate than expected" or "trying to make a profit". What's really shady about this ordeal, is them trying to trademark an idea so generic as "reaction videos". They consistently try to conflate their (unoriginal) "show concept" with the basic idea of reacting to stuff, which is massively arrogant and exploitative. I think CGP Grey explained it well in his latest spoof videos, in which he claims he's gonna "franchise stick figures".

I don’t think that’s what they are doing, and I think people who say that’s what they doing are either being dishonest or unfair. (Actually you can’t even “trademark reaction videos”, that’s not how trademark works). The Fine Bros have an easily recognizable and clearly unique format for their reaction videos, and everybody knows this. No one does “reaction videos” the way they do (and if someone did, it doesn’t matter, this is how business works), and they feel they need to protect this intellectual property, which is what literally anyone who runs a business and wants that business to succeed would do. The React World announcement was not even to say “we are trademarking reaction videos”, it was them announcing that they are licensing their brand to other creators. If someone made video in the same style of CGP Grey using stick figures drinking coffee, he would be well within his rights to sue or get YouTube to take the video down. This is how business and intellectual property works. (Also I’ve not seen the CGP spoof, but if that’s what he said, count him among the people who either don’t know how trademark works [which I doubt] or who are being unfair to the Fines).

I think they did a poor job of explaining their intentions, but any person who looks at this honestly and has paid attention to their follow up explanations, can see that they’re not trying to “trademark reaction videos.” With all due respect, this is a ridiculous and silly accusation with no merit. Like many things on the internet, people have run with the bandwagon of emotional non-nuance and failed to do any research or try to figure out whats going on. In actuality, the underlying issue here is that people think this is against the “ethos” of YouTube or online creation. And this is due in large part to the inept way React World was announced. And like I said before, we’re at a point where we have to realize that for many people YouTube is a business, and they’re not going to play soft ball just because people think they are or should be their friends.

Why the rules?

I know I harp on about following the rules to get your submission posted but it’s only because I want to keep this blog ordered and easy to search. Also, I still delete about every 5th submission I get because people just can’t be bothered to spend 30 seconds reading the rules right above the submission box.

Leave your url or other contact info in the ‘caption’:
When I didn’t enforce this, I was FOREVER getting messages from people asking how they could contact someone. It also means that you are more likely to have someone contact you (because it is easily for them to do so). AND if you are not logged into tumblr, it will NOT automatically leave your url, even though it asks for an email address - it simply says ‘anonymous submitted’ and there is NO way for people to contact you.

Do not select more than 1 age group tag
I have 3 age groups available in the tags. I can only provide 30 tags all up so I have tried to make it broad but still relevant. When someone tries searching for a girl who is 18-24, she is expecting to see only girls aged 18-24. Otherwise, it is a complete waste of time to even have the tags there. Most other blogs like this do not enforce this rule, which means a search for a girl aged 18-24 just brings up pretty much everyone who has submitted. 

Do not select more than 1 location tag
People have been getting better with this one. I don’t get so many people selecting every single tag compared to a few years ago. Again, it is so people can search for someone from that area. The main problem with this is people simply not taking the time to read the tags properly, so they will select UK and USSouthWest (which is the tag for people who live in southwest USA) so something similar to this.

I have no problem in deleting submissions that don’t follow the rules. I spend a lot of time making sure that this blog is simple and easy for people to use - all I ask is that you spend 30 seconds reading what I have written. 

merryfortune asked:

EnAtsu w/ 1 to 9

  • How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any daily rituals?

En easily falls asleep so that’s not a problem to him, for some reason I headcanon Atsushi with a big insomnia. So I think he falls asleep depending on the day. Atsushi wakes up first but he hides the fact he has insomnia. 

  • How’s their team work? Do they share well?

They do, mostly because they are best friends. I feel like their relationship would be strong because of this.

  • Are they open about their relationship? How do they feel about public displays of affection?

Honestly I think they would act the same. People couldn’t tell if they are in a relationship or not because they would be the same as always, nothing changes.

  • First impression of each other? Was it love at first sight?

No. Like I said they are best friends. At least from my point of view I think if something happened between them it would after many years, as adults when they realize they are not kids anymore and something between could work. As teenagers could be something like innuendos and full of confusion, but it wasn’t love at first sight.

  • Nicknames? Pet names? Any in-jokes?

It’s canon they have in-jokes. The milk joke for example. They wouldn’t have special nicknames. I don’t know this ship is kinda monotone, nothing would change just the same relationship but changing the status to dating.

  • Any tasks that are always left to one person?

Atsushi is a freaking housewife leave me alone.

  • What annoys them the most about their partner? Would they change it if they could?

No, not really. They are used to each other, as the time passes it’s nothing to them. Maybe Atsushi could have some grudges inside but he probably doesn’t notice.

  • What do the like best about their partner?

They are themselves, and that’s all tht matters.

  • Do they discuss big issues? Religion? Marriage? Children? Death?

Discussing with En would be like discussing with a wall, and Atsushi wouldn’t waste his time. I honestly don’t think they would like to have kids. I know Atsushi is the grandma friend but I can’t see him as a parent. En would want but if Atsushi says no it’s no. 

santa3495 asked:

I've heard stories about fay teaching people how to work with metal, do you know if there is any truth to it and if so is there any more you can tell me?

I do know there are fairies that teach various forms of crafts and arts. 

  • Habitrot, who teaches young women how to sew. 
  • Gruagach, a fairy queen that protects cows, could be called to teach how to raise and care for livestock
  • Fliethas, a fairy queen, could be called to teach you the art of healing

Now, in regards to metal craft? Now, I do /view/ the Tuatha to be of the fair folk, so you could easily call on one of them like Lugh (of the many skills) or even Brigid. 

So I decided to try and fancast the actors and actresses for the Throne of Glass series. I am aware that these people don’t all look like how the characters were described in the book but I do love how they both look and act and I can see them as perfect people for the parts.

Keep reading

I just talked to myself and ended up in tesrs

I started to talk to myself saying
“I really don’t understand how people can insult others and be proud of it, and than feel good about who they are. There are even friends that laugh at the insults, and than I sit there holding the tears in. I have been insulted and made fun of so many times, it seems to get to me so easily. My friends never stand up for me when someone’s made fun of me. It even happened to me today. My friend laughed at everything the person was saying and I litterally was about to cry. I know how people always say ‘Don’t care about what other people think about you, or say about you’. But how am I suppose to do that when once I hear what they say, it locks into my brain. How do people get away with it. Why!!? I just don’t understand how they have such a nerve to enjoy putting others down, and make them hate their selves! I was given a life that won’t last forever, all I ask for is to enjoy it and hear good things, and be proud of who I am. But than I hear things said about me like “That is a hippo I see” or “That ugly asf”. They don’t actually see what a couple of negative words can do to a person. There are actually people out there that self harm badly or even do suicide because of people out there saying such horrible things that no one deserves to hear! No one! If people enjoy to spend their life causing harm to others lives, I really don’t see why those people even deserve a life. I should be able to be my self, wear what I like, do my make up how I like, and be completely proud of being exactly who I am. So those people that seem to love hurting people so much, need to knock it off! Now! And finally realize what idiots they are to feel so cool for making someone feel bad about there selves. Every word, every insult causes a dent to someone’s life, and sometimes even causes another scar to someone’s own body……

I’m also positive no body is even gonna read this, but I had to let it out some how, and I’m tired of crying…

i know it’s still a ways away, but i have this idea for my dissertation and i’m really excited to run it by different people. it’s kind of a departure from what i thought my dissertation was going to look like, but i feel like it’s a better representation of my interests than my original idea. it might be somewhat less attractive on the job market, but i’d rather a department hire me knowing where my true interests lie anyway.