He’d come home from a long day of practice, opens the door, and immediately the smell of your cooking hit him. He almost threw his bags down and made his way to the kitchen. You felt his hands snake around your waist and he kissed your neck. ‘’Welcome home!’’ You giggled and put the spoon you were holding down. ‘’Sit down,’’ you said and pointed to a chair, while you walked over to the fridge to grab some milk. When you turned around to the food on the plate, you were surprised when all you could see was an empty plate. You sighed and looked at Jaebum, who quickly finished what he was eating to look at you.
‘‘This will make me feel better,’’
Since Mark was sick, you decided to take care of him and make him his favorite meal. It was easy to make and light on the stomach so he wouldn’t throw your hard work up. As you walked to the bedroom, Mark already smelled what you made and told you to hurry up. When you entered the room, Mark was already sitting up straight, ready for his meal. You thought that since he was sick, he wouldn’t be that hungry, but boy, you were wrong. After he finished his first plate, he asked if you could make more. With his puppy eyes, you couldn’t say no to the poor guy, so you ended up standing in the kitchen to make him food for another three times that day.
‘‘I’m still mad at you,’’
After a fight you and Jackson had, you realized you were actually in the wrong, so you decided to make him dinner to try and make it up to him. He was silently sitting on the couch, playing a game on his phone. As you approached him with the plate of food, he coldly looked at you and called you cute, before he grabbed the plate out of your hands and started stuffing his face with whatever you made for him. Eventually, after having eaten everything you had made for him, he couldn’t help but forgive you for the delicious meal you prepared for him. Even though he kept saying he was still angry, he knew damn well he was lying to himself.
‘‘You tried your best,’’
You knew Jinyoung was working hard on their upcoming comeback, so you wanted to spoil the boy a little. Before he came home from another long day of practice, you were in the kitchen for hours, having to redo many things, eventually thinking that it’d be good enough. Jinyoung came home and immediately saw the trash that was in your kitchen. He walked over to what you said was his plate, making him burst out in laughter. As you tried to figure out why he was laughing so hard, you saw that the chicken that was on his plate was completely burnt and then it hit you. You put the wrong chicken on his plate. Jinyoung, however, still appreciated your cooking, but he did advise to take some classes.
‘‘(Y/N)’s the best, I know,’’
When Youngjae messaged you all the guys were starving in the dorm, you told them to stay put and that you would take care of them. You decided to cook them a quick meal and deliver it to them. As you entered the JYP building, 3 guys basically tackled you. BamBam took the bags out of your hands and ran into their practice room with Jackson running after him, screaming in joy that their food had finally arrived. It left you alone with Youngjae, who started yelling that you’re the best person ever, covering your face with kisses, picking you up and rushing to the practice room to taste some of your amazing cooking, also feeding you and bragging to the guys about just how perfect you are.
‘‘Why didn’t you make more?’’
When you walked into the dorm with a lot of bags, filled with delicious homemade food, BamBam could barely keep himself from ripping the bags out of your hands to quickly devour everything you made. This boy was hungry and he wasn’t going to hide that. Before you could even properly put everything down, this man was already feasting on the amazing dinner you had made for him. You thought everything would be enough since you made a 4 people portion size, but before you could even sit down, he was already asking if you had more, pouting when you told him no. The next time you’d cook for him, you were going to make a lot more.
‘‘Can I try again next time?’’
You came home after a long day of school/work, and you were surprised to see Yugyeom cooking… Or something along those lines. You were surprised the kitchen wasn’t set ablaze yet, because Yugyeom was doing everything wrong. When he saw you, he immediately asked for help and you decided it’d be best to start over and just let him cut the vegetables. However, this pouty baby boy didn’t agree with you and ordered you to let him do something more ‘chef-like’ as he said. You had to give in when he started his aegyo, but you soon regretted that decision, because he burned the food yet again.
You never thought you would become friends with a celebrity, you just gave your c/v as a receptionist, thinking that the front desk had nothing really to do with the rappers. You spoke a lot of languages and you had a degree so you were the chosen one to become the front desk for AOMG. You were so happy that they hired you, the salary was good and even though you were not a singer or a rapper you felt happy you were in the company, they were all so chill and helpfull.
You were very shy and nervous when you got there you, you would bow so low that you could touch your toes.Hyuk woo took a liking to your cute personality, but as you slowly got comfortable he realised how you could really be. You got close to them, so now it was normal for you to roast everyone, even Simon who could be very tricky.
You and Hyuk Woo became friends right from the start, but Hyuk woo didn’t see you as a friend and he hated it when you would talk about guys in front of. So he tried to make it more obvious about his feelings and to him it seemed like you were responding. You loved how adorable and positive he was, you were never the one to fall for the ‘bad boy’ you prefered the nerdy funny ones.
“Hey Hyuk woo”
He said without looking at you, his eyes glued to the phone. You frowned at his greeting but you just brushed it off and put your bag on the desk
“How are you?”
You expected him to ask you how you were, like he always did. Instead he just stayed silent and ignored you.
~Maybe he is having a bad day~
you thought to yourself, trying to calm yourself down.
“So… any news?”
“No, anyway I have to go. See ya”
He said and walked off to one of the rooms. You were pissed off now, Hyuk woo was always a gentleman, now he was being a complete asshole and you didn’t like it at all.
“Hey do you know what’s wrong with Hyuk woo?”
You asked Hyun Jung, your other close friend in AOMG. She just shrugged her shoulders and pushed out her bottom lip
"No, not really. Did anything happen?”
“Yeah, he is being very…. distant let’s say”
“Really? That’s strange. Maybe he will snap out of it in a bit”
“I can’t do it”
“Yes you can, I promise it will work”
Jay said to Hyuk woo. He hated this, he didn’t want to play this game, but he had no other choice.He asked help from Jay, Simon and Gray and they all said the same
“Just be a little cold and then go and swip her off her feet but in a sexy way. Girls love that”
“She didn’t seem happy about this”
“Yeah cause she likes you, but then when you go and flirt with her she will melt into your arms”
Seonghwa instructed. Hyuk woo let out a heavy breath and nodded. Maybe it could really work… if he prayed to God a lot then maybe
“Hey baby girl”
You turned around with one of your eyebrows raised. There he was, standing right in front of the front desk with a smirk on his lips.
“You heard me. You look gorgeous”
After of a full day of him IGNORING you, he thought that if he say some sweet and flirty shit he would get away with it? This got you even more mad.
~who the hell does he think he is?~
You thought making your hands into a ball fist.
“Are you drunk?”
“No, but if you want to we can go out for a drink, I might have time today since you look so sexy”
His voice was low and he winked. You were disgusted, he was acting like… Jay and it was extremely strange. It’s not that you hated Jay, he was a great guy, but his way of flirting was not appealing to you.
“What’s wrong baby?”
“You know what’s wrong, your attitude. Lose my number and never talk to me again, get the fuck out of my face bitch”
You said, completely fed up with his way of flirting. It was time to leave anyway so you just took you bag and coat and walked out of the office, leaving him stunned
“I told you!”
Hyuk woo barged in Jay’s office, finding all three “geniuses” there. They all looked at him with a questioning look
“She got mad. She cussed me out and told me to lose her number and never talk to her again”
“What did you do?”
Hyun Jung butted in. Hyuk woo turned to her and realised that Hyun Jung could be his last chance of making this right.
“I wanted to impress (y/n) and I got some dumb tips from Jay, Kiseok and Seonghwa”
“Hey, they’re not dumb. You probably did something wrong”
Kiseok defended his methods. Hyun Jung made a squeaky sound as her mouth went wide open
“You idiots! (y/n) hates that hot and cold thing, she was gushing to me about how sweet you were, you were perfect! why did you even do that?”
“How can I make it right?”
You opened the door without thinking. As soon as you saw him you regretted your actions
“Was I not clear enough?”
“I am sorry, please let me explain”
You took a deep breath in. You looked in his puppy eyes and how sad he looked, you looked down and nodded your head.
“I… like you. I thought I wasn’t good at flirting and I took advice from the others. I guess they were wrong”
You knew exactly who he meant. The unholy trinity and the most dumb people when it came to your taste in men. You chuckled at him
“Why did you ever do that?”
“I was desperate”
You hugged him while you still alughed at his stupid move. He hugged you back, thanking God and Hyun Jung
“I like you just the way you are, you should have known that those ways don’t work to me”
“apology accepted, now get in her you will catch a cold”
watch out before you fall in love with him
don’t make him your world
because once you make him your sun you will just be another one of his planets that circulates around him
and does whatever he asks you to do
and don’t fall for his trap that when he tells you to lose weight or to untie your hair because he loves you and wants you to look your best for him
please don’t believe that for a second, you were beautiful before you met him and you will be even more beautiful once he leaves.
before you put him on some pedestal, see him when he’s mad at you
wether its a “ill hurt him if he ever tries to talk to my girl again” or if its a “its your fault anyways cover up next time”.
see if he takes your side on things or if he always finds a way to blame you
pick up on the small stuff because trust me if he grabs you and leaves your arm aching for the next 3 days just for looking at his phone because he’s texting some girl claiming “we are just friends” but you aren't stupid enough to believe that he can spit down you are beautiful and i love you down some girls throat and just expect you to believe “we are just friends"
maybe you can because maybe i was never beautiful to you or maybe you never loved me, i was good to use, push around and order around.
i swore id never let anyone ever get the best of me but you started showing up in improbable places and your touch was taking over my body, sometimes it felt like you were trying to make sure to hurt me even when you were not around.
your hands were still choking me but you weren't there,
just in my mind
if he doesn't motivate you to love yourself and to do good for yourself he doesn’t love you, he loves the idea of you and what you do for him.
he needs your money to buy him stuff, he needs your heart to take care of him and he needs you because there is no one else willing to do what you do for him.
that’s not love thats bored
that’s him being bored and worried about being alone
that’s him stringing you along but you are running out of place to hold on to him you can see him slipping away.
you never forget your first, any kind of first
it could be the first test you failed
the first boy or girl you loved
the first person who made you hate yourself
your first true best friend
or the first time you lost your virginity
you never forget your first time something new happens
but trust me you will find a better man than the first one who tore you apart and left scars in places no one can see
fuck sometimes i wish people could see the scars you left on my heart and on my ribs and in my brain, how were you able to in carve your name into my heart and tattoo yourself into my brain and in my memory, i swear to god you broke my ribs when you left i was bed ridden for weeks because my world turned into a big dark grey cloud and the numbest you left me with instead of that goodbye still resonates in me.
i’m still waiting for an answer
don’t ask for closure, don’t even expect it
we are not all that lucky to get it
i had to make my own closure.
i wish i would have met you later maybe i would have handled it better. i wouldn't have push people away or killed my sadness by destroying myself.
i became a regular at the hospital with my panic attacks and i tried to tare off the wristbands but they were almost as resistant as i was to your name calling.
it went from i love yous to i hate yous
to forever to i wanna fucking leave you
i tried so hard for one guy who never even told me i was beautiful unless i asked him.
you never knew if today would be a good or bad day, because it was always walking on a very narrow rope when being with him
you wanted to be his world but in reality he dragged you around like all you were good for was for his own benefits.
and i hope you fucking listen to me when i say that
he will never change
and he will never stay
and he will never come back.
he left you because he knows what he did wasn't right
but that doesn't mean you are any less human for the ways you tried to numb your pain.
you can cry your eyes out a day later or 5 years later
just don’t think his voice is the only one you will love to listen to and don’t think his touch is the only one you will ever feel and please don’t think he is the only person that will ever want to be with you.
you have more beauty and love inside you and he hated how perfect you were and that’s why he had to tear you down, because he hated himself.
i guess i understand it now he never loved me, he loved the love i gave him and my love turned into his self love
and that’s when the tables turned
and i became the one who hated myself, the only difference is he wasn't there to ever help me and love me back.
S.Coups: He would think your being insecure about yourself and would just boost up your self confidence about your skills because he knows how perfect you are. “Jagiya, why are you so cute? You know you’re great at everything.”
Jeonghan: he’s flawless yet he’ll still think that you’re much better and that’s why he loves you. He believe in you, he’s your angel who’s always there looking after you. He’ll even teach you how to rap, sing, dance etc. because he will always support your decision and will always support you.
Joshua: Holy Jisoo, this boy can do nothing wrong especially to his girl. He’d be such a gentleman and sweet honest guy. He’d support you in becoming an idol all the way, 100%. He’d love that you’d one to be an idol and wouldn’t mind hearing your honest thought about your skills cause he’ll be there to teach you how to sing and probably even play the guitar and sing to you as well just to make you feel better about yourself and make you feel better about your skills so that you’re confident in becoming an idol
Jun: Even though he doesn’t seem like a very talkative type of guy, he’d still sit down and talk with you, try to make you feel better about your singing, rapping, dancing skills. HIs smile and just happiness of you becoming an idol would make you feel better.
Hoshi: This guy would be jumping up and down, way too excited on the thought of you wanting to be an idol. He wouldn’t calm down at all and his happiness would just spread everywhere lol. He’d be more focused on just the thought instead of your skills because in his mind your amazing even though you don’t really think so. When you constantly tell him that you’re worried about your skills he finally calms down a bit but would still be happy to dance with you. The two of you would have a fun time while he teaches you who to dance just a great as he does.
Wonwoo: A huge warm smile would creep on his face right when you tell him about wanting to be an idol. He’d be so happy in the inside and would show that to you but hugging you and probably even kiss you on the forehead or something. Thought you’re worried about your skills, he’ll comfort you with kind, soft words that only you’ll hear from him and no one else.
Woozi: Being a producer himself, he’d love to help you with your skills in singing and you be a bit professional in it more than romantic but the aura around you guys would still be great and loving since he does still love you and while you sang he’d just smile because he knows you’re a beautiful person inside and out to him and he knows great things will come your way in the future when you become an idol.
DK: He’d be so smiley about the whole situation. He’d just love the idea of you becoming an idol and that would mean he’d get more time with you if you do become an idol. Through everything, he’ll act very positive about the idea of you as an idol and also making you feel better about your singing skills especially since he’s a singer himself. He wants you to be happy and confident so he’d boost your confidence a lot. “Jagi, I know you’ll do great!! Now give me a big hug.”
Mingyu: The big dork would love to have you as an idol. He would love to teach you how to rap better and although there would be a few funny times while he teaches and gets you better at rapping, it’s ask fun for the both of you and he’d be glad to have more time with you.
Minghao: This kind, innocent boy can do no wrong. Although he wouldn’t react as ecstatic as some of the other members, he’d still feel very happy and warm about the idea of you becoming an idol. It would mean That you’d get to probably spend more time with him which he’d love and he’d very sweet, wanting to help you with your skills although he already thinks your amazing and perfect.
Seungkwan: He’d be way too excited even though you haven’t become an idol yet, he would already start imagining the collars and things you could do with him once you do become an idol. He would be your #1 fan and would have so much confidence in you. He would be confused and surprised that you thguot that you were bad at singing but he’d still support you and with his great vocals, he’d help you to become just as good as him. He would also talk way too much about you becoming an idol to his members too lol.
Vernon: He wouldn’t really know how to say anything to boost your confidence about your skills but in his head he already knows you’re great. He’d be really smiley about the thought of you becoming an idol and would greatly support you and help you out. Since he writes his own lyrics, he’d love to work on things with you and help you with your rapping a lot which would make him happy to spend more time with his girl and rap.
Dino: Gawd, this little maknae would be the cutest and happiest little maknae there ever was. HIs great big smile and his eyes you brighten up once you tell him you want to be an idol like him. He’d be excite to show off his dance moves for you just so you can be as great as he is at dancing.
A/N - To who requesed this…I HOPE YOU’RE OK! YOU ARE SO AMAZING AND DON’T LISTEN TO WHAT OTHER PEOPLE SAY ABOUT YOU.
You could feel the familiar sting of unshed tears filling your eyes and you immediately looked up, trying to blink them away.
‘@hater: why is dan even with @Y/T/N? She’s such a slut.’
‘@hater: @Y/T/N is the definition of a hoe lol srsly’
‘@hater: no offense to @Y/T/N but…@danisnotonfire can do waaay better lol’
Those were just a few mentions that you’d received in the past five minutes and it was honestly getting completely out of hand. There were days when you could handle all the hate you received but today was not one of them. Everyone seemed to be especially hateful today and even the sprinkles of compliments you received weren’t making you feel any better.
You knew better than to let it get to you and actually read any of them but after getting the same repeating messages over and over again, you began to start believing it yourself.
You didn’t know how long exactly you had been sitting there all you knew was that Dan had been gone for about an hour and he would be back soon. So you quickly wiped away your tears and touched-up your make-up, determined to have him see you happy, as usual. You were still in the bathroom when you heard him come through the door, “I’m home!”
In your haste, you completely overlooked the fact that the laptop was still open; displaying the cause of your tears.
It didn’t take very long for Dan to glance at the screen and see all the comments made to you. About your hair. Body. Face. Calling you all kinds of names.
He knew this was upsetting you. Whether or not you looked like it was, he knew that the fact that you were even looking through all these hateful comments that it hurt you.
“Y/N? Can you come here for a sec?” He called, hearing your footsteps coming up the stairs a few seconds later.
“This had better be good, I was watching-” You were immediately cut short when you saw what Dan was looking at.
“Damn it,” you cursed under you breath and you quickly turned around preparing to go back down the stairs.
“Y/N.” The sound of Dan’s voice made you stop dead in your tracks, turning around to face him, you slowly began to make your way to sit next to him. You knew there was no way he was going to let you of the hook.
“Why were you…? Looking at this.”
“I-” Your voice cracked and you began to feel like you had felt a few hours ago, “I was just-” You took a shaky breath and shut your eyes.
“Y/N, please tell me you don’t believe any of this crap.” You could feel his gaze hitting you and at that moment you became undone. You opened your eyes and a tear slid down, you began telling him how you’ve been feeling for the past few days.
It seemed like you just weren’t good enough. You had so many things to do and everyone expected so much of you. You began telling him how you felt like you were drowning and no one was helping; your appearance was dragging you down and you dreaded looking into the mirror some days in fear of breaking down.
You tried slowing your breathing down but with how fast you were speaking you couldn’t catch your breath.
You didn’t even feel him wrap an arm around you, all you heard was slight whispers of him telling you that you were amazing and you didn’t have to prove anything to anyone. How what everyone says about you isn’t true because he knows who you are and your family and friends know who you are. You were someone who always put others before your own self. Someone who was incredibly driven to be a good person, even to the people who were so rude to you. How you weren’t perfect but that’s why everyone who matters loves you so much. Including him.