how to use a condom

(Super-fast idea, because I found this picture and, after laughing at the Sheriff’s face for two minutes straight, the idea hit me straight in the face)

Several years in the future, Derek and the Sheriff are kind of buddies.

Derek is now a consultant for the Beacon Hills police for any kind of supernatural crime or when they need his super sniffer in critical emergencies (Derek found the lost little girl almost immediately, while the K9 unit from the next town was still lost in the woods. The Sheriff was so proud. They never talk about the fact that they had to circle the town in John’s police car, Derek’s head hanging out of the window like a poodle on a roadtrip).

So John and Derek sometimes hang out, watch football match together, they have a beer, talk about Stiles’ news from college. They enjoy each other’s company in a very quiet, simple way.

Then, Stiles comes back to Beacon Hills for Christmas, and immediately comes out as bisexual to his dad.

The Sheriff blinks, then hugs him.

And that should be the end of it. John is genuinely glad that Stiles told him, and happy that he seems to grow up happy in his own skin.

John honestly doesn’t mean to search stuffs online, but he’s bored, and one innocent question about LGBT rights in California turn into a quick google search and quickly devolve into a spiral of links. John falls deep. Too deep.

He manages to keeps his anxiety at bay all the way to Derek’s home, and his knocks on the door are barely frantic. But Derek opens the door as if he is expecting the Sheriff to be on fire, so John guesses that he didn’t control his panic-stricken heartbeat as well as he thought.

After a few minutes of assuring Derek that no, Stiles is fine, John is fine, everyone is fine, no Stiles isn’t hurt, nobody’s kid got missing again, Melissa is fine, there is no monster eating anyone, Stiles is totally ok, and getting a glass of perfectly good whisky from Derek (who apparently keeps it around just for John), John finally explains.

Because Derek? Derek is bisexual.

They have talked about it in passing several times. Talked about Derek’s ex, Jeff, who used to be a cop in New Jersey until he got shot on duty and became a teacher. Talked of the creep Derek had to call the police on one night while he was drinking at the Jungle and despairing over the shitty techno music. Talked about the association for LGBT kids Derek gives money to, and that he goes help from times to times.

To the Sheriff, it never seemed like a detail more important than knowing that Derek hates cheap beer or that he is a sore loser when his sport team gets slaughtered.

But now, now it is important. Because the Sheriff needs someone with answers, precise answers, about things that he can’t ask directly to his kid.

About giant sex toys and trips to the ER and drugs use and STDs and biphobia and bullying.

He kind of blurt it all. Derek’s eyes look gigantic and his eyebrows almost fly off his forehead.

So that’s how Derek becomes the Sheriff’s mentor in everything LGBT.

It’s not as weird as it could be.


Derek answers all the questions as best as he can, tries to reassure him. When he doesn’t know (and he wonders where the Sheriff got these informations), they look for answers together online, while staying far away from certain websites.  

(All the while, Derek tries to ignore really, really hard, that Stiles is bisexual and apparently single. He fails).

Then maybe the Sheriff brings Derek back home in the hope that Derek will talk to Stiles about all these stuffs (because he’s not sure he has mastered the details enough to give the bisexual version of the Talk. Also, the image of the humongous dildo is still haunting him).

So they end up all around the kitchen table, Stiles looking bewildered and a little bit lost, Derek resigned and awkward and the Sheriff looking at them with crazy eyes (again, gigantic dildo. And ER trips. Melissa works there, this can never happen to them) until they start talking.

Stiles knows all those things. Derek knows that Stiles knows. They talk about it anyway because, well, the Sheriff is starting to turn grey in worry.

After a little while, Stiles finally understands that Derek is talking from experience. That Derek is bisexual. And single.

And Derek knows that Stiles is bisexual. And single.

The awkwardness quickly turns to vague innuendos, then obvious flirting, then eyefucking over mugs of coffee.

The Sheriff gets his colors back progressively. He wonders for a second if he should protest this development (the whole, 7 years older and a werewolf thing could be a problem), but really, Derek is a great man.

And he apparently knows how to use lube, condoms, and would never be stupid enough to use a gigantic dildo then lose it somewhere in his son.


All in all, he’s ok with the direction this whole thing is taking.


(You can find my other headcanons/not fic here and my fics on AO3. Please come say hi on tumblr when you want people :D)

marino-kun  asked:

Do you take prompt? What about Stiles having a secret crush on Derek but when saw him, taking care Scott's son, he fell in love.

I’m not much of a kid fic person, so this took me a while, but I tried. Hopefully it’s kind of what you were angling for!

*

“Do you think I’m ready for fatherhood?” Stiles asks, trying to keep the panic out of his voice. He’s not freaking out about this. He’s not.

Boyd says flatly, “Stilinski, you’re twenty-one years old. You’re supposed to know how to use a condom by now.“

Stiles’ hand spasms and he accidentally squirts a huge glob of ketchup on his mound of curly fries. Fuck. He has the ideal ketchup-to-curly-fry ratio down to a science, and this is not it. “No, absolutely not what I meant. It’s just. Did you know Derek had a kid?”

Boyd meditatively takes a bite of his burger. “No. But the nice thing about Derek is that he doesn’t go in for personal talk.”

Stiles shoots him a weird look. Of course Boyd would think that was nice. Stiles, though, has been trying to break down Derek’s walls even just a little bit for months now—sitting with him in class, sharing his notes, studying with him in the library and getting late-night waffles together afterwards, little by little pulling Derek out of his shell. He’d thought he was getting somewhere, but obviously not, not if Derek failed to mention this kid even existed.

Which he does. Stiles knows, because he can see him right now, over by Prof. Martin’s pool. Apparently his name is Jamie.

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  • Oscar: Hey, your name is Ruby, right?
  • Ruby: Yep! You must be Oscar.
  • Oscar: I am. It's very nice to meet you
  • Ruby: Qrow said you were new here. I am too! Wanna go exploring with me? I mean, unless you have other plans...
  • Ozpin: Ask her to take her tits out!
  • Oscar: Wha-NO! Of course not!
  • Ruby: Awesome, where do you want to go? We could go to the market, down main street,
  • Ozpin: Take her to your place!
  • Oscar: My place?
  • Ruby: Your place?
  • Oscar: UM
  • Ruby: Don't you you're moving a bit fast?
  • Ozpin: IT'S ON! You're getting some tonight!
  • Oscar: No I'm not!
  • Ruby: Oh, well, I mean, I guess it can sometimes be normal to, well, I mean, I've never, uh-
  • Ozpin: Alright, you know how to use a condom, right?
  • Oscar: I don't even have a condom!
  • Ruby: ..........
  • Ruby, running away: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG!
Shit.

2,500 Followers Drabble

Prompt:  “Is it too soon to say that we’re fucked?”

Pairing: firefighter!Jensen x Reader

Requested: @atc74


You’re pacing frantically in front of the Austin Fire Station, doing your god damn best to not hyperventilate. The fact that you even made it here is a fucking miracle. You literally sat in your driveway for a good hour, stupidly turning the ignition on and off in your car.

Considering the predicament you’re in, you appear to be quite pulled together. You’re even donning clean clothes and light makeup, a vast improvement over the last few days.

So now here you are at your friend Jensen’s place of employment, meeting him to spill the news that has you in such a tizzy.

“Hey, hun.” Jensen somehow appears out of fucking nowhere, the sound of his simple greeting startling you.

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First Time || Peter Parker

this was inspired by JustKiddingFilm’s ‘your first time’ video. it was really interesting to watch and I just had to write something for Peter! I’ll get back to working on the requests that I’ve amassed so far a bit later, just let me indulge in this one quick story ♡♡♡♡♡

for this story, it’s set sometime in the future, where Peter and the reader are in college and are both around 21 years old. 

warnings: SMUT!!! There’s gonna be a lemon, and if you don’t like lemons then I don’t recommend that you read this !!

**don’t repost/plagiarize this plot! reblogs are fine!

——————————————-

When your best friend invited you and Peter to hang out with her and her boyfriend at Starbucks, you didn’t think that their conversation would go into such dangerous territory. 

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Velvet Box (Mafia AU)

Originally posted by theking-or-thekid

Summary: Hoseok is kind, charming and friendly, but there are some lies behind the blinding smile of this strip club owner. Jungkook is a mysterious, passionate musician- and don’t you know that you need to sacrifice in order to achieve your dreams… sometimes even your morals?

Genre: Ansgt, Smut, Fluff

Pairings: Reader x Jungkook, Reader x Hoseok

Word count: 5k

Trigger Warnings: Smut, swearing, strippers, criminal activity, thigh riding, oral

“You suspect that whenever he thinks like this, it means your question might have an answer he doesn’t think you’ll like.”

Part 2

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BTS Reacts - Finding Out You’re Pregnant

request via dms : “a little react of BTS finding out that you’re pregnant?”


Min Yoongi: ‘I’ve never thought about raising a family,’ he casually says in passing, as he watches a happy family walk past, through the window. You’re a week into your pregnancy; you haven’t told anyone. You know Min Yoongi is focused on his career, and having kids wouldn’t really fit into his lifestyle. You don’t want to burden your boyfriend of several years, but you know you’re going to have to let him know about this sooner or later, no matter how hesitant you are. ‘I’m pregnant,’ you curtly confess. His turns around so swiftly; his jaw hangs open for awhile, processing this knowledge - he is going to be a dad. It scares him, and he is resisting every instinct in his body that makes him want to run out of the room yelling at the top of his lungs, but when he looks at you, all he sees is the person he loves, about to give him the gift of his life. The truth is that Min Yoongi has never thought about raising a family - until he met you.

“I … what? Are… are you serious?”
( You nod in reply. )
“… I guess I’m gonna have to get used to more than one person calling me ‘daddy’, now…” 

Park Jimin: You’re nervous as to how he is going to take the news of an unexpected pregnancy. When he emerges from the elevator, he explodes with enthusiasm - ‘jagi, did you watch us on television last night?’, ‘did you see us accept the award?’ - an endless stream of questions pour out of the singer. Hoseok asks if you’d like to go out for drinks with them, but you refuse. ‘Why, are you pregnant?’, joked Namjoon. You stare at your boyfriend while he’s on his victory-high, but the look you’re giving him causes his bouncing to slowly come to a stop. An awkward silence hangs in the air, and Hoseok constantly switches his attention between your still bodies. He mouths a visible ‘oh my god’, exchanging glances with Namjoon. You mutter a weak ‘yes’ - hearing you say that you’re about to give him a baby makes him queasy - but little does Jimin know, down the road, he would be a proud father of three sons, and he would wonder why he ever overreacted in the first place.

“J-Jagi, are you for real? I… can’t even… what!? How!? We… we used a condom, didn’t we!?”

Kim Seokjin: You’re having lunch together, when suddenly, your body convulses, and you make a break for the bathroom. He’s concerned for you, so he gets out of his seat and walks over to the door, calling for you from outside. You quickly retort for him to stay out, and you start retching between words. His brows knit - did you eat something that didn’t agree with you? He’s noticed you taking trips to the toilet a lot more, but he’s always thought it’s because of how much water you’ve been drinking lately. A pang of realization hits him when he thinks of the last possible reason for your sudden illness. The last time you’d slept together was a month ago. Seokjin definitely sees children in his future, and even though he has trouble stomaching all this right now, he’s unable to contain himself. He would want nothing more than the person he loves to bear his child. Having kids would mean the world to him, but he needs to ask you one thing before he accepts this turn of events.

Jagiya… I know you’re pregnant. I want you to know, that I’m ready as ever to embark on this journey with you. I want to be with you and our child forever, if you’ll have me.”
( What are you saying, Jin? )
“… Will you be my wife?” 

Jung Hoseok: You’re at the doctor’s office - you haven’t been feeling particularly well lately, so you decide to take your problem to the clinic by yourself. When the doctor informs you of your unplanned pregnancy, your heart stops. You’re not sure how to get this news to your boyfriend. You ring up Hobi to tell him that you’re dropping by Bighit. His ears are sharp - he is able to detect the anxiety in your shaky voice. He pesters you to tell him why you’re upset, and after at least five minutes of his persistence, you cave in, announcing your pregnancy. There is a long silence on the call, and you’re concerned that he hasn’t digested this news well. Hobi is a family man - the thought of spending the rest of his life with you and his new kids gets him amped to a maximum. Jung Hoseok runs at full speed into the practice room, yelling at the other six members of Bangtan as you hear him wail over the call:

“I’M GOING TO BE A DADDY, EVERYONE!”

Kim Namjoon: ‘I’m flipping out, what do I do?!’, Kim Namjoon eavesdrops on your phone call as he stands idly outside your bedroom. He’s noticed how tense you are all night, and he’s tried breaking the ice with both affectionate kisses and playful humour, but none of it unwinds you from discomfort. Hoseok finally returns your calls after hours of you dialing him. You had to tell someone, just not Namjoon yet. He urges you to relax, and to just talk to your long-time boyfriend. When you’re through with the call, you find the man himself seated down on the sofa, having been left to a state of uncertainty after hearing the word ‘pregnant’ escape your lips. Namjoon’s undecided about his opinions on having kids - it’s not that he’s unwilling to start a family with you - he just can’t believe it’s actually going to happen. Watching you freak out puts him on edge, so he tries to remain as calm as possible, making the first move, struggling to keep in his panic:

“… Is there something you want to tell me, babe? Like, I don’t know… BEING PREGNANT!?”

Jeon Jungkook: The answering machine on the desk beeps as Jungkook screens through the calls in the apartment. He’s decided to make himself comfortable at home before you return from work, so checking his calls is the first order of business. A medical clinic calls, ‘the results of your blood test for pregnancy are in, and it’s positive - please get back to us if have any more inquiries’. Jungkook has reached a whole new level of freaking the fuck out - he is so shook, that he simply goes about his regular routine around the house, making himself a bowl of cereal before sitting on the couch, waiting for you to return. His brain has short-circuited, and he just stares blankly ahead. Some part of him is wondering why he’s so scattered about you bearing his child - sure, he is young - but if there’s anyone in his life he wants more to have kids with, it’s you. This line of reasoning results in him being more accepting of the fact that he’s about to be a father.

“… I wonder what’s a good name that goes with Jeon…”

Kim Taehyung: He’s casually brushing his teeth in the bathroom, when his eyes catch something unusual in the dustbin. ‘Jagi, what is this?’ You hear Taehyung’s voice from your bedroom, and it clicks in your mind that you haven’t taken the trash out yet. Ohmygod, you think, starting to feel the dread set in. You fly off your bed, scuttling toward the bathroom in haste, panting hard from racing your way there. You find him examining your pregnancy test closely. You’ve been meaning to tell him, but you wanted to make sure through a doctor’s visit, first. You bite your lip, anticipating his reaction - however, when he turns to you, you see tears well up in his eyes. You’ve been afraid to bring this news to him, but you should have known that Taehyung loves kids like nothing else, and to him, discovering that the love of his life is going to bring him even more happiness than they already have, makes him realize: one by one, all of his dreams are coming true.

“Yah, pabo… I can’t believe you’re pregnant… do you know how much this means to me?”


This was hard to do, mostly because I kept juggling back and forth between them reacting as ready, future parents, or unexpected recipients of the news. Either way, I sincerely hope you liked how it turned out - thank you for requesting, please enjoy! <3

When We Collide (Part 7)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: NC-17

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

When We Collide on Wattpad

A shaky breath escaped from your lips so loudly and deep it echoed in the otherwise quiet bathroom. You had made sure you were the only one in here in fear of someone else showing up but now it was as if everything around you was blurred.

The stick in your hand was just as blurry as everything else. How could this be possible? How was it even possible? None of it made sense to your mind.

“I can’t be fucking pregnant.” You stated to yourself but when you looked into the mirror to see your devastated expression reality hit you hard.

Keep reading

Imagine being the Winchesters' little sister and telling them you're pregnant.

Originally posted by sam-and-dean-winchesters

“What do you mean you’re pregnant?” your older brother, Dean, hissed as you slowly held up the small white stick. Tears streamed down your cheeks and stained your loose t-shirt. Anything tight would have shown the weight gain and the small bump forming on your abdomen.

“I-I’m sorry…Guys, he used a condom…I don’t know how…”

“Oh, well, it’s a little too late to make sure that it didn’t break! I know exactly how it happened! If you wouldn’t have been whoring around you wouldn’t be in this situation!” The volume of Dean’s voice was enough to rattle the walls and wreck your nerves.

“Dean,” Sam started, “calm down! There is nothing we can do! Look at her! She’s scared, she’s worried, she’s crumbling down in front of us!” Green eyes shot your way, but fury covered the sweetness that was once there.

“Well at least tell me you know who the boy is,” Dean sighed but stopped when your face drained of color. “You son of a bitch! I thought you were smarter than this!” Even Sam Winchester, the master of staying calm, was beginning to grow irritated. His arms were crossed and his stance grew into one that mocked a deranged killer ready to attack. 

“When did this happen?” Sam demanded.

“W-When I went to watch a movie with a friend of mine…We didn’t go to the theater that night…”

The youngest Winchester brother sighed and pulled at his hair. “How long are you?”

With a trembling lip, you lifted up your shirt to reveal a small but growing bump before hugging your arms around it protectively. “16 weeks…”

So here you were…16 weeks pregnant at only 16 with no idea who the father could have been. The party was supposed to be a great memory but now it was only a huge regret. Love, though, was already too strong to break your bond with your unborn child. No harm would ever come to this child…no matter how hard things got…

anonymous asked:

how do you think the rfa would react to an mc who was nervous about having sex with them because she'd never done it before? like she's nervous about not being good at it or making a mistake

Sure thing! (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧
Before I start this off, I do want you (all of you and the anon!) to know it’s perfectly okay to be nervous your first time, or your first time with a new person.
You can get better at sex! No one ever seems to talk about that, but guys and girls get very worried over having to be the very best on the first try. I can tell you my first time with a guy wasn’t very satisfying due to both of us being nervous as hell, and that’s completely normal, okay?
If you sleep with someone and they’re mean about the first time not being super duper amazing, kick em to the curb! Find someone who’s willing to help you be more comfortable, and you help them as well!
Okay, lecture over, headcannon time!


Zen

- When you first admitted it to him after an intense make out, he ended up blushing and pulling away a bit to look you in the eye.

- “Am I going too fast?”

- “No- I mean, well… I don’t know.” You wrung your fingers nervously, feeling your spine light up with anxiety. “I wouldn’t mind to keep going but… I just want you to know I’m going to be terrible at it.”

- “Babe, no.” He kissed your forehead, slipping his hands together with yours. “Don’t think like that, okay? You won’t be terrible.”

- “But I haven’t done ‘it’ before.”

- “So?”

- You clammed up, not really knowing what else to say. You kinda ruined the mood already…

- But Zen wasn’t letting the topic go so easily. He brushed your hair away from your face, kissing your cheek this time. “The only way you could make it bad for us is if I wake up the next morning, and you’ve left and broken up with me, okay, hun?”

- You scoffed a bit, rolling your eyes, but… That did kinda make you feel a bit better.

- The next time you two ended up getting a bit too handsy, he gave you a questioning look. After a brief pause, you nodded, and the two of you ended up moving to the bedroom.

- You were nervous- Shaking and almost even tearing up from worry- but Zen just calmly and carefully led you through it. Small kisses, going slow, asking if what he was doing felt good.

- When the pleasure was getting to you, you finally let your guard down a bit, and just flowed along with the motions- Doing what you felt was right.

- Zen gave you small praises as you acted on your own- Telling you how good you felt and how every brush of your lips was driving him wild

- Admittedly, it didn’t take too long for either of you to finish. I mean… It had been a while for him too.

- He shyly slipped an arm around you after the two of you cleaned up. “Princess, do you mind if we cuddle?”

- You ended up laughing quietly, pulling him closer to you and nuzzling his shoulder.

- Yeah… That wasn’t too bad.

- I mean, practice makes perfect too….

Yoosung

- He ended up confessing that to you at first. Shyly admitting it one day after a long cuddle session on his bed. 

- “Yoosung, I haven’t done anything like that either…”

- He was actually kinda glad. He didn’t feel so unmanly now if you hadn’t either!

- But…He still didn’t know what to do if the two of you ever went that far…

- Over the course of a week, he ended up privately talking to his guild mates and Zen (Seven would Not take him seriously, there was no way he was going to ask him for advice!!). Zen offered him pretty legit advice. How to properly use a condom, how to try and hold out, what he had personally discovered girls liked.

- And…Since a lot of his guild mates were girls, they were more than willing to give tips for your sake. I mean, girls gotta look out for each other!

- (It would take him ages to admit that he had to ask for advice from others)

- Your main research was the occasional smut fic or two, or the heavy romance scene in a game/novel.

- So, the two of you weren’t completely clueless about sex, but you both were nervous

- One night you came over to a dimly lit apartment with a few flowers in a vase, Yoosung looking completely red-faced. He was trying his best to be romantic but also letting you have a way out if you needed it.

- When it came time where you both were half undressed- Yoosung ended up shaking more than you. He didn’t want to hurt you at all, but he knew he was probably going to screw up.

- It ended up with the both of you slowly helping each other out- Settling each others nerves with sweet kisses and burning touches

- (He was so relieved when he managed to last long enough for you to cum first holy shit )

- Afterwards, the two of you shyly cuddled. Him asking you if any of it felt good, and you doing the same. Both of you blushing and giggling as you two realized you made each other feel pretty damn good.

Jumin

- He actually expected it when you first admitted it to him. Some previous conversations had hinted at you never going that far, and your blush when he teased at such things was another clue as well. Either that, or you were very shy.

- He hadn’t slept with anyone before either, but that didn’t mean he didn’t know what to do. Before he had met you, he did check out a few Expert Playboy books for research, in case he ever needed/wanted to sleep with a woman

- Also to figure out some terms he had overheard some of his business partners say in gross conversation

- Needless to say, it wouldn’t bother him in the least. “That’s alright, I believe I’ve done enough research for the both of us. Regardless, no matter your experience, when we do have sex, you won’t be getting much sleep that night.”

- (Jumin calm the fuck down jfc)

- Even though he sounds like he’s going to be rough (and some various hints that he may like it rough), he would plan to be very careful with you the first time. 

- He would set it up to be romantic, but also have strong hints about it during the say so you have plenty of time to tell him no if need be. He doesn’t ever want to force anything on you.

- When it finally comes to the night where the two of you have sex for the first time, he would initiate a lot of foreplay for your benefit only- Getting you relaxed and calmer about the situation.

- Fingering? Oral? Yes yes yes. Even a small break of just kissing in between the foreplay and the real deal.

- And even then, he asks to make sure you’re ready, that you can still stop him if you don’t want to do this.

- He’s gentle through the whole thing. A few hickies, very light nips, trying not to grasp your thighs so tightly. But by the end the both of you are worn out and he lazily pulls you to him to cuddle.

Jaehee

- She’s had sex before, but…Not with a woman. When you admit to her you’ve never done it with any gender, she’s very understanding and doesn’t mind it.

- But she’s nervous as well. Due to having to research things constantly, she also researches how to have sex with you. She mostly goes by what feels good for her, but who she slept with wasn’t really much for focusing on a woman’s pleasure, rather than his own, so…

- Regardless, when the time comes that the two of you do it, she’s very gentle with you. Makes sure her nails are clipped and short, nothing to hurt you, and focuses on the first time together to be mainly for your pleasure, and to lessen your nerves about sex in general.

- She focuses on kisses, on your neck, on your breast, as she circles the pad of her finger around your clit

- The first time between you doesn’t last that long- After fingering you for a while you do cum easily (WHICH ISN’T BAD IT’S NORMAL), and she refuses for you to try anything.

- “I just want to focus on you tonight, dear.”

- She does insist on cuddles, and for open discussion on anything you didn’t enjoy.

Seven

- Buddy.

- He is a huge virgin right next to Yoosung. Granted, if it wasn’t for his job, he would probably have had sex before, but that’s a different subject.

- When you shyly admit it to him, he just smiles. “Yeah, me either! It’s okay though!”

-( He has probably watched a lot of porn, though…)

- But, really, he doesn’t mind. And why would he? He hasn’t had sex either, he can’t really judge anyone, nor does he want to.

- He does want the two of you to have a slow pace, though. He doesn’t want to have sex unless the both of you are very ready for it, and after it’s been a bit into the relationship.

- He doesn’t want you to think he’s using you for sex. You’re the light of his life, he never wants you to even come close to thinking he’s using you for anything.

- When the time does finally roll around, he’s very nervous but tries covering it up with bad sex puns. Some so bad you’re even smacking his shoulder and telling him he’s killing the mood.

- But, when the two of you finally get to the point where he’s inside of you, he’s constantly muttering praises to you.

- Watching your features to make sure he’s not hurting you- Watching you as he gives you some of the best physical pleasure you’ve ever had.

- All during sex he’s peppering you with kisses- Anywhere he can touch. Shoulder, face, neck, chest. Just anywhere, because he wants to make sure you know he’s doing this out of love, and not just to seek pleasure.

- Afterwards, the man is all over you in cuddles. It’s probably the only time he’s not talking or joking- He’s so tired and happy.

- He does check and make sure he didn’t hurt you, though.

Saeran

- When you admitted it to him, he blushed rather harshly. You were slightly taken aback, because he didn’t blush too much unless it was due to PDA.

- He looked off to the side, trying to contemplate exactly what to say to you.

- “Are…You okay with someone like me being your first?”

- “I don’t mind, I’m just sorry in advance. I won’t be very good, at all actually.”

- He gripped your chin lightly, turning you towards him. “Hey, don’t talk about yourself like that.”

- Right…He really hated it when you talked down on yourself. The first time you did it he held your hands so tight as he explained all your negativity about yourself was bullshit to him.

- He loosened his grip on you, slowly leaned over to give your lips a soft kiss.

- “I’m glad you’re willing to accept me as your first…”

- God, was he still blushing?

- He wasn’t very good at being romantic on purpose. Most of the time when he swooned you, it was on accident. He was just saying what he truly felt. Who knew that actually worked?

- But when the two of you were cuddling, and you felt him get hard, you turned around to face him- Purposely kissing him a bit deeper than usual.

- “Saeran….If you want to…”

- He didn’t need to be asked twice. 

- He was used to the rougher stuff- Just quick hookups in bars and the like- But he didn’t want it to be like that with you, not your first time.

- He carefully traced his fingers over your nude body, swirling his his pads over the spots he loved the most, carefully watching your face for any sign for him to stop instantly.

- He was happy that he at least knew the basics of sex. Sure, in the past when he had done it, it was mainly for his own pleasure, but…The girls said he was good? He hoped he was good to you, too…

- He left marks all over your neck and jaw- Hickies and nips that were a bit too harsh (”…Sorry, do you need me to stop?”)- His fingers dipped into you and hit your gspot on nearly every pump (”A-Are you okay?”)

-By the time the two of you were done, your legs were shaking from how he managed to rock you through two orgasms. 

- He slipped an arm around you, burying his face in the nook of your neck.

- “I told you, you were fine. Stop doubting yourself.”

♡ Ethan as Dad of Twins

A/N: I did this as if they are identical twins! I did a line to separate twin boys and twin girls

Originally posted by dolantwinsgifs

Constantly confusing the twins for one or the other

Always insisting that Gray can babysit

Having to meet Gray at the hospital because he accidentally gave one of the boys a PB&J forgetting one was allergic to peanuts

Having to prevent Ethan from being over an overprotective dad and attacking Gray for sending one of your kids to the hospital

Always being the only woman in the house

Him potty training your sons

Best Mothers Day gifts

E helping his boys in sports

Showing them his game that won you over

You telling your boys “don’t listen to you dad. Buy her flowers and ask her out”

Him helping your sons pick out their tuxedos for prom

Him buying them their first playboy magazine

Him showing them how to put on a condom using a banana

Fixing their hair and straightening their ties for their wedding


Twin girls/Daughter

Him letting your twin girls sleep on his chest

Him nicknaming your girls “buttons” because they are as cute as a button

Wanting them to wear matching outfits

Him carrying them on his shoulders

Insisting on hanging their macaroni art all over the house

Him clutching the steering wheel as they tell him about their boyfriend from their kindergarten class

Him calling the school insisting to switch your daughters out of the class to keep them away from boys

Him having a talk with you when he notices that his little girls have boobs

Him having another talk with you when he was doing laundry and found some blood stained underwear

Him asking “what are your intentions with my daughter” during a family dinner with her boyfriend

Him trying to convince you to switch them into an all girl school

Him wrapping his jacket around his daughters during prom pictures

Him wanting to chaperone your daughters on their dates, but you convince him “they have to grow up sometime” so instead he just looks at their baby photos and remembers his little girls

Him trying not to cry at their weddings

Him being the greatest grandpa ever

When We Collide (Part 8)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: NC-17

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

When We Collide on Wattpad

”What do you mean Holly is going to be my girlfriend?” Luke’s confusion was clear on his face, eyebrows furrowed and jaw falling slowly.

You were having the exact same expression on your face but kept quiet after your small outburst, you were just so shocked you didn’t know whether it was actually a real statement or just a simple lame joke.

Keep reading

“And Then She Ran” Daryl Dixon

Words: 2,023

Summary: After Daryl’s daughter dies, he finds her diary and learns more about her than he wanted.

Warnings: This is dark. Death, some swear words, angst

A/N lol I cried writing this

Link to part 2 here!

-

Daryl can still remember his daughter’s death like it was yesterday.

It was her on her eighteenth birthday. Daryl, not one to show his emotions, had gone out of his comfort zone that day to make sure it was a special one. He’d had Carol over to cook her favorite breakfast (at least, her favorite out of the few options they had), and while on a previous run, he found her a beautiful diamond necklace in a house that was still in good shape. He managed to find some paper to cover it with. He had everything ready to go. It was not often that she got to feel like she was special.

They had a fight that day. This was not just any normal fight, not like the ones that they usually had. And they had fights often. This fight was different.

Everyone had noticed that she had been acting differently lately. Nobody brought it up with her, but everyone knew something was wrong. Daryl was the last one to catch on, and when he finally convinced her to tell him what was going on… It turned into the worst fight they’d ever had.

She had run off after that fight, but Daryl didn’t pay any mind to that. She had a habit of “running away” for a few hours. The first few times she did that, Daryl freaked out. He looked for her up and down until the minute she came home. Usually she came home drunk, which would just piss Daryl off more, but at least she was ok. So after a few times of her pulling that act, Daryl stopped worrying.

“She’ll be back soon.” Daryl told himself that day, not bothering to run after her.

She didn’t come back. As a matter of fact, she never came back. A few days after her disappearance, Rick, Daryl, and Glenn went out looking for her. In her place, they saw something they wish they never saw.

She was dead. She was a walker.

Daryl broke down after that, crying harder than he had in his entire life. He just lost his little girl. When he got back to their house later that night, he grabbed the necklace and threw it out the window, sobbing.

It took Daryl a while to be okay after that. In reality, he knew he’d never be okay, but he was okay enough to move on. It took almost a year before he could even go into her room again. It smelled like her; he could almost feel her presence in there. That was comforting for the first few days, until he realized he was never getting her back. She was gone.

-

This was the first time he’d been in your room since that night. Daryl took in the surroundings- it was a mess in here.

‘She was definitely not a tidy person.” Daryl thought to himself, laughing softly. He sat on the bed, taking a deep breath.

“I shouldn’t be in here.” He said out loud to himself, getting up to leave. But something stopped him. He noticed a notebook nudged in between the mattress and the floor. Hesitating, he picked it up and opened it to the first page.

‘I’d been caught with Carl more times than you could imagine.

At first it wasn’t anyone important catching us, only people like Maggie or Glenn who I knew wouldn’t say anything. Then, Rick found out. Rick was pissed, and told Carl to stay away from me.   “She’s too much trouble, Carl. Don’t get involved with her.” Rick had told him. I know he doesn’t like me. He only tolerates me because I’m his best friend’s daughter. I know he’d kick me out of the group if he could. So when he promised me that he wouldn’t tell my dad if we stopped while we were ahead, I agreed. I cried, and told him I’d keep it friendly between the two of us.

Carl didn’t listen. I didn’t either. I just played it up so he wouldn’t tell my dad. We just found other places to sneak around to and have sex.

But, oh boy. The look on my dad’s face that day when he saw me on top of Carl, clothes scattered everywhere. I hadn’t seen him scream that loud at anyone in his life. Daryl Dixon is not a man to piss off. I don’t know how often I’ll be able to write in this but I’ll try to as much as possible. Don’t exactly get too much free time around here.’

Daryl knew he shouldn’t be reading his daughter’s diary, but he couldn’t stop himself. Despite the conditions of the world forcing them to be together all the time, he knew absolutely nothing about his daughter except that she and Carl were together and that she was good with a gun.

A part of him knew it didn’t matter anymore. She was dead.

He turned to the next entry.

My dad is keeping me on a leash now. He’s mad at me. I don’t care. Carl’s the only person that genuinely makes me happy. My dad doesn’t make me happy. He just wants to control me.

I know this put a damper in his friendship with Rick. Rick’s saying it’s all my fault because I’m a bad influence. My dad stood up for me, but I know deep down he agrees. I’m a “problem child.” I have attitude. I’m dramatic. I like to venture out on my own and go explore, sometimes bringing Carl with me so we can have alone time.

I know my dad wishes he had a better daughter. Sometimes I wish I was. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t born, and that my mom gave birth to a different kid. A kid that wasn’t me. I bet my dad would love that. He hates me.

My 18th birthday is in two weeks. I don’t know if legalities matter anymore in this world, but I’ll be an adult. I want to be treated like one. I want off this leash. I want to be allowed to be with Carl without being told no.

I won’t stop seeing him.’

The more Daryl read that, the more his heart broke. He never knew that she thought he didn’t care. Tears starting forming in his eyes, but he wiped them away quickly. He refuses to cry about anything anymore.

‘I’m sick. I can’t stop throwing up everywhere. It’s odd, because I feel fine other than when it just hits me out of nowhere, and no one else is sick beside me.

I refuse to even think about the other option. I’m sick, that’s all.

I got to kill a lot of walkers today. I haven’t got to do that in a while. It felt nice to hold a gun again. Carl is sweet with me. He’s always making sure I’m okay, being protective and all. He loves me, he told me that today. I think I love him too.’

Daryl didn’t know Carl and her were that serious. He thought they were just hormonal teenagers, doing things that teenagers done. He didn’t know there was feelings there. That was an odd thing for Daryl to imagine, love. He hadn’t ever felt it for a girl that wasn’t family.

‘It’s confirmed. I’m pregnant. I did something to piss off my dad, so then it would start a fight, and I ran off without him trying to find me. If I ran off without a reason he’d be suspicious.

I found the tests in the town over. It wasn’t a long walk, but the coldness was getting to me. I ran home, and hid the box in my coat.

My dad didn’t even look at me as I walked past him.

I don’t know how I’m going to tell Carl. God, how am I going to tell anyone? My dad? Rick? I don’t understand how this happened. He pulled out every time. We didn’t use condoms, they’re not exactly easy for either of us to obtain, but I thought pulling out worked, too. I guess I was wrong.

I suppose I didn’t really have anyone to teach me this stuff.

I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. I’m sitting here writing in a diary like a little girl for God’s sake.’

Tears spilling, Daryl slammed the diary shut. He couldn’t read anymore. He stormed off the bed, and punches the wall near him.

“Daryl?” Rick appeared. Daryl turned his body to face him, ready to break at any moment.

“She thought I hated her.” Daryl says slowly, trying to keep his voice from cracking.

“I doubt she thought you hated her. She knew you loved her. You wouldn’t have gotten so protective of her if you didn’t love her.”

“Rick, I foun’ her diary… I shouldn’t have read it, but I did. She said she wished she wasn’t born because she thought she wasn’t a good enough daughter for me.”

Rick could see the man in front of him, broken to pieces. He felt for him.

“I’m going to finish reading it, I think.” Daryl said after a few moments of silence. Rick took that a que that he wanted to be left alone, and made his way out of the room.

Daryl’s hands shook as he reached for the small, brown notebook once more. Turning it to the last entry she made, he took a deep breath and continued reading.

‘I told Carl.

He took it okay. We were in the middle of eating breakfast that Carol had made for the group when I pulled him outside to talk. He was mostly freaked out. I don’t know if he was more freaked out at the fact that he was going to be a father, or the fact that he would have to tell HIS father. But in the end, he knew his father would be supporting regardless. He gave me a real big kiss and told me we would get through this together.  

I told him I didn’t want to tell anyone until I told my dad first. I’m telling him today. It’s my birthday. I figured it’s as good of a day as any to tell him.

I found the necklace he got me. The paper he had it all wrapped in was torn and it was falling out. It was beautiful. I’ve never seen anything to beautiful in my life. I don’t think my dad’s ever gotten me a gift. It makes me happy. Not because its material, but because it’s meaningful. I don’t get attention from him like this. It makes me want to cry.

Stupid pregnancy. Makes me emotional.

I can’t wait for him to give it to me. I feel like maybe it’s his idea of trying to open up to me. If he’s willing, I’m willing.

I have this idea that if my baby turns out to be a girl, I want to give the necklace to her when she gets older. I want to keep it in the family. If we live long enough for that.

I love this baby so much already. I’d do anything for him or her, I can already feel it.

I’m going to tell him whenever he gets back from doing whatever he’s doing. I know he’s going to kill me. I’m getting anxiety about telling him. I considered just not telling him at all, letting him figure out on his own that he’s going to be a grandfather. But I need to tell him. I’ll write in this later and-“

It stops mid-sentence, not continuing. Daryl notices stains on the side of the paper, a puke-ish color, like she got sick while writing that and forgot about it.

He slowly closes the journal, mind numb. He knew the rest of the story.

-

He had home early from checking out a possible un-scavenged pharmacy with Glenn when he saw her sitting outside, deep in thought.

“How did it go?” She had asked him, attempting to build up a conversation with him before dropping the bomb.

“Overrun by walkers, but mostly un-touched. Rick’s sending in a team tomorrow to clear the place out.”

“Awesome,” She had said blankly.

“Look, I know we’re not the perfect example of a father daughter relationship, but if somethings wrong I need you to tell me.” Daryl told her, taking a seat next to her.

“Dad, I’m pregnant.”

Daryl looked over at her in shock. Her eyes were rimmed with tears, and her stomach felt nauseous, although she wasn’t sure if that was from more morning sickness or the anticipation of waiting for his response.

“You’re jokin’, right?” He looked at her dead in the eye. All she could do was stare at him.

“Fuck.” He cursed, getting up from next to her. “How could you do that? What the hell is wrong with you?”

“It’s not like we wanted this, dad!” She was angry.

“I’m gonna kill him. I’m gonna rip his head off.” Daryl was fuming.

“Dad, please-“

“God, I don’ understand, why couldn’t you have just been a good kid? Why do you gotta run around causin’ problems for everyone. I shouldn’t even be surprised.”

He had hit a nerve. She looked at him, no response. He looked at her one last time before storming into the house, slamming the door shut.

“I’ll never let anything happen to you.” She talked to her baby, rubbing her stomach. She was so angry that she forgot to grab her gun.

And then she ran.

Used Pt. 2

Originally posted by nctinfo

You looked at the bright screen of your phone and smiled. You wanted nothing more than to be in front of him right now. Quickly, you sat up from your bed and put on the closest pair of shoes you could find.

You made your way down the staircase quietly and were careful not to wake your parents or brother. They could never find out you were sneaking out in the dead of night to meet a married man. What would they think of you?

As you trod to his house, you noticed a dark silhouette by the wooden door. Your heartbeat sped up and you felt a tingling sensation on your lips, remembering the kiss from earlier.

“Y/N,” Lee Taeyong greeted, a hint of mischief in his voice.

Before you could respond, he was dragging you inside the house.

“Don’t make any noise, Jaehyun’s sleeping upstairs,” he whispered, placing a thin finger over his lips.

Quickly, you nodded and he continued to take you in the direction of where you had been earlier, the dining room. I guess this was the room farthest from the bedroom.

When you two reached the intended destination, his grip on your wrist automatically loosened. He stood just in front of you, his tender eyes peering into yours.

“You wanted to find out how good I can make you feel, baby girl?” he smirked, his fingers gingerly pulling the waistline of your pants.

Although his touch distracted you, your eyes never left his; you were completely captivated by his demeanor. In this moment, you wanted nothing more than for him to take ownership of you. What was this sudden change of heart?

He took your unresponsiveness as a yes and proceeded to lower your pants, leaving you only in your light blue panties. He attached his lips to yours. The kiss deepened as he backed you up until you felt the sturdy edge of the table below your ass. Teasingly, he bit at your now swollen lips and dragged his fingers over your clothed heat. 

“Mr. Lee, please,” you whined against his mouth. 

“Kitten, call me Taeyong.” 

“Taeyong, please…” 

“Please what?” he breathed, the warmth tickling your neck. 

“Fuck me.”

His gaze turned dark. Within seconds he had you pinned on the Victorian table, your panties discarded on the tiled floor while his middle finger steadily pumped in and out of you. You whimpered, a weird and foreign feeling in your stomach beginning to form. When he added a second finger, a loud gasp escaped your mouth. Instinctively, he cupped his hand over your mouth. 

“Sweetheart, if you can’t keep quiet, I won’t be able to give you what you want,” he groaned.

You felt him press his hard member against your inner thigh which in turn made your stomach churn. All you wanted was to feel him inside of you; therefore, you willingly cupped your hands over your mouth and nodded. He smirked and continued to pump his fingers in and out of you while his other hand squeezed your right breast and his tongue made circles on your neck. 

“You’re dripping, kitten. I think you’re ready for me.” 

He sat up on the table and hastily stuffed his hand into his pocket, bringing out a small, square-shaped wrapper. 

“I’ve actually never used one. Can you help me put it on?” he confessed smiling shyly at you. 

You returned the smile and seized the small package from his hands. Although you hadn’t used a condom either, you had learned how to put one on a banana in sex ed. Carefully, you obtained the condom from its wrapper as he lowered his pants, his hard cock springing out. Usually, you would’ve been shy and hesitant on sliding a condom over one’s private but right now, you needed him to fuck your brains out. You slid the condom over his erect member as your lustful and needy eyes swallowed each other. Hesitantly, he moved in between your legs as you remained seated on the dining table. 

He held his throbbing member and slid every inch of it into your dripping pussy. His warm, wet tongue played with yours as his hips grinded onto you. Never had you been granted this much pain and pleasure in your life. 

Your breathing soon became shallow; the unceasing thrusts granting you an overwhelming amount of pleasure. Unable to suppress your moans any longer, you tightly cupped your mouth with one hand and grasped at the table with the other. Taeyong sped up his pace and cocked his head back, on the verge of release. 

Within seconds, you felt the knot in your stomach snap but Taeyong didn’t stop. His rough hands squeezed your breasts mercilessly as his thrusting became erratic. As you lay there, you felt your body being pushed up harshly against the cold table.

“Taeyong, I can’t,” you begged, your heat beginning to ache from the over-sensitivity.

“Shut up,” he demanded, his eyes shut as he pounded into you continuously.

After a minute of senseless thrusting and you not trying to think of the discomfort, he orgasmed. He pulled out of you and disposed of the seed-filled condom. 

You dressed yourselves in silence. The libido, which was present seconds ago, had vanished and left only a pair of embarrassed individuals. As he walked you to the front door, you realized you were the only one who was left feeling disconcerted and vulnerable. The look in his eyes said it all. This hadn’t been the first time.


“Can I taste you next time?” Taeyong teased, biting his lips.

You smiled as your cheeks glowed red under the dim light just outside his house; you couldn’t muster up a single reply. 

“Goodnight, Taeyong,” you said timidly. 

“Goodnight, Y/N.” 

In the cold winter night, you trudged to your safe haven. You weren’t exactly sure how you felt after the careless act. It had brought you more pain than pleasure. Would it feel better next time? Why were you even thinking of a next time? You expelled the thoughts from your head and drifted into a deep sleep. 

 Once again, you found yourself in class on a snowy Monday morning. The weekend had allowed for much contemplation and newfound regret. 

You found yourself asking infinitely many questions, one which rose above all. What made you think sleeping with a married man would be a good thing?


During your Mathematics lecture, your eyes never met with Taeyong’s. He called on you once to solve a problem on the board. You went up to the board, solved the problem, and were able to avoid his icy stare. 

Four days had passed without any contact. It was Friday morning and you were anticipating the weekend. Your family had planned an out of town trip and you hoped it would clear your head of all things Taeyong. 

Mr. Lee began the lecture as per usual and you jotted down the examples he was writing on the board. Somewhere in between derivatives and integrals, you stopped listening to the lecture. The events of Friday night held your thoughts captive. How could you act in such a horrid manner? Had your morality completely vanished?

A faint voice off in the distance released you from your thoughts. You hadn’t realized the frustration and annoyance in the voice until your full focus was on the tall figure in front of you. 

“Y/N, this is no place for daydreams.”

“Be prepared for an hour of detention after school,” Mr. Lee announced, his tone irritated yet his eyes told a different story. 

You sighed and rolled your eyes. You knew you not paying attention to the lecture was not enough for detention on a Friday. 

You went along with your day and at four o'clock, you headed to Mr. Lee’s classroom. You were going to explain to him how your family was planning to leave before evening. 

As you walked into the classroom, you observed Mr. Lee leaning against the desk, a stack of papers in his hands. You had to admit the view was nice. 

His platinum-colored hair was messily combed to the side, as if he had used his fingers to comb it, and he wore a black button down with matching slacks. 

You knocked lightly on the door which had been left ajar. 

“Come in,” Mr. Lee said, his eyes never leaving the papers in front of him. 

“Actually, I- ” 

“Don’t say anything.” 

He set the papers aside and ambled to where you were. His hand reached for your wrist and you were tugged into the classroom. He slammed the door shut behind you and turned to you. Now, his gaze was solely on you. 

Again, you were left speechless. 

“Why have you been avoiding me, Y/N?” he questioned, gently placing a wintry hand on your cheek.

You flinched due to the coldness. He swiftly retracted his hand and his once clement demeanor changed to one of predation. 

“You know what I think?” 

He didn’t let you answer. 

“I think you’ve been a very bad girl, Y/N. You come to me in the dead of night and give yourself to me. Did you expect for it to end there?” he questioned, tilting his head to the side.

“If you did, you were mistaken–Baby girl, I think you need to be punished,” Taeyong stated, and this last was in a different voice. It was playfully taunting yet sinister. 

In his eyes, lust was evident. However, why was there no sign of affection? Of love?

Because it was sheer lust.

me and @jackmcknightley were talking and came up with this headcanon

  • Imagine Otabek sending Yuri dirty pics while he’s sitting next to Viktor. 
  • And Viktor is shocked and all Yuri says is “calm down old man" 
  • And later Viktor is crying/talking to Yuuri because he thinks Yuri is still to young for these kind of things even though Yuri is already over 20 
  • Viktor decides they need to have “the talk” with Yuri
  • He insist they should teach Yuri how to use condoms by practicing on bananas
  • Otabek has to come too
  • So both of them sit on the couch while Viktor shows them and tells them all they need to know and Yuuri is like "I’m going on a walk with Makkachin”
  • And then Yurio - bored expression on his face- says “you know we did it multiple times, right?”
  • Viktor’s expression is scandalized and terrified at the same time
  • He looks at Otabek and he only shruggs his shoulders
  • Then Yuuri would get back and absolutely scandalized Viktor would tell him all this and Yuuri would pat his shoulder and say “they are dating for four years. What were you thinking they do?”
  • VIKTOR IS OVERPROTECTIVE DAD AND YUURI IS COOL DAD.

anonymous asked:

Ur descrip says ur open to headcanons but can u imagine being aomine or kagami's or murasakibara's friend? It would be Pure.

AN: YAAAAAS the holy trinity of really awkward friendships if you’re a female tbh


aomine

  1. At first, he’s the friend that you aren’t sure if he considers you a friend. You’re around each other almost all of the time, but you didn’t start getting to know each other until a bit later. So it kinda looked like he just tolerated your presence at first.
  2. The more you got comfortable around him, the more he did the same. He teases you a lot and ruffles your hair because you’re shorter than he is.
  3. The friend that would casually watch porn in front of you.
  4. The friend that would put porn on your laptop’s browser so that the minute you open it, the website is in full view.
  5. He gets very protective of you. He doesn’t appreciate others flirting with you without his approval or referral first. If you’re talking with someone in the hallway, he’ll stare them down until they leave.
  6. Likes to use your shampoo.
  7. Makes you cook him dinner whenever he’s over.
  8. Will flirt with you once in a while because he likes to see the disgusted look on your face.
  9. Is never prepared for anything ever so your backpack is his backpack and he uses all of your things.
  10. You’re the only person he turns to when he’s upset. You were very surprised at first because you thought Momoi would be his go-to, but he never did that in the beginning of their friendship and didn’t want to bother starting. So he’ll call you, show up at your house randomly, or just straight up use your spare key that you hide in the bushes to sulk on your couch as you feed and comfort him.

kagami

  1. Kagami always takes his friendships very seriously, so he treats you with the upmost respect while at the same time showing you how much your friendship matters to him.
  2. He wears a friendship bracelet you made for him every single day. He only takes it off when he’s showering.
  3. Whenever he’s preparing his lunch for the next day, he’ll always bring you a little something in a separate container.
  4. You’re his guinea pig when he’s trying new recipes.
  5. Shoves food down your throat if you’re over at his place and refuses to let you leave on an empty stomach.
  6. Always asks you to help him with basketball; not with his technique, but more like he wants you there to support him and carry a bunch of water bottles and towels.
  7. Refuses to eat or cook anything penis-shaped in front of you because he gets embarrassed.
  8. Had to ask you how to put on a condom using a banana.
  9. Always sets time for you two on Fridays to go to Maji Burger. He lowkey looks forward to it every week.
  10. Will give you a complete care package when you’re sick; packs you a large thermos of homemade soup, various medicines, and rental movies that you both can watch.
  11. He gets nervous talking to anyone cute, so you have to be his wingperson while he’s a blushing mess behind you.
  12. Refuses to let Alex meet you because he’s afraid she’ll make out with you and he’s protective of your virginity in a weird, brotherly way….

murasakibara

  1. You call him over to your house to clear out your fridge because some of the food is reaching it’s expiration date and you can always rely on him to eat it all.
  2. Likes to sleep in your bed while you study at your desk.
  3. He is very comfortable around you and gets kind of clingy. He doesn’t like being away from you for too long, so if you stayed home from school one day, he’ll use bringing you our homework as an excuse to see you. He would definitely never admit that he missed you.
  4. He eats everything in your pantry and it annoys you every week because you spend so much money on groceries. Sometimes he feels bad, so he’ll make you lunch and an apology cupcake.
  5. Really looks forward to your birthday because it gives him an excuse to bake you a cake. On any normal day, he’d be too lazy to bake.
  6. When he’s upset, he becomes a big cuddle bug. He’ll barge into your home and will sit with you on your couch with a blanket wrapped around the both of you. He’ll become a big baby and lay his head on your shoulder and pout. He doesn’t mind if you both sit in silence watching tv - in fact, he prefers it that way most of the times - but if he’s so upset that he’s crying, he’ll want you to play with his hair and tell him everything will be ok.
  7. You’re the only one he allows to touch and play with his hair.
  8. He thinks it’s cute when you have to ask him to get something on the top shelf.
  9. He is also very protective of you and gets jealous easily when he sees you talking so casually with other people you don’t know. He doesn’t like the idea of people stealing his friends.
  10. He thinks it’s funny when you gag when he jokes about being hung like a horse.
  11. If you can’t make it to every single one of his home games, he pouts the entire day.
  12. His favorite pass time is annoying you in class by poking your cheeks, playing with your hair, flicking your ears, basically being a big child around you.

Hey guys! I’ve gotten a lot of new followers lately, so I thought I’d do a little summary of what’s been going on my blog so far this year to update you all.

I’ve been unusually prolific, so I’ve got a lot of new Sterek fics up, including some old WIPs I updated this year.

So, without further ado, here’s the masterpost, as of early May 2017. Happy reading!! And let me know if you think a post like this for my older fics would be helpful as well.

Keep reading

|| Yours To Love || [[smut]]

{summary: will he still love you if he knows about the new life growing inside of you?}

this is a day late and i’m sorry ;w; work was so crazy yesterday that i really couldn’t write for this au as much as i wanted to.

this short series is almost done with, with the next update being the EPILOGUE. I may do the first and second parts of this story in bucky’s POV, but we’ll just have to wait and see, because i’m not TOO confident when it comes to taking on a male’s POV.

ps i am so sorry for sinning on easter.

[ {I’m Yours} series tagging list ]: @iamwarrenspeace , @topkay , @imagine-thingsandstuff , @acunningstargazer , @sea-kale , @marvel-fanfiction , @sebatianstanisbae , @boom-boombang

warnings: brief usage of bondage (namely handcuffs), oral (female receiving), thigh riding/fucking (idk what it’s called but if you readers are brave enough to read this poorly written smut, then you’ll know what i’m talking about)

**please don’t repost/plagiarize this story. reblogs are fine**

——

Keep reading

yay for cool banners

sup nerds i decided to collide all of the masterposts and masterposts of masterposts into one giant ass masterpost because why the fuck not
here we goooo
(EDIT: Some of the links didn’t work, so i had to link them to the post on my blog!!)

other masterpost

  • fruitcroc’s makeup/beauty masterpost
  • br0k3n-dreamland’s movie/tv masterpost
  • asbakes’s hugs ass masterpost of cool stuff
  • starrify-everything’s writing masterpost
  • diamondhero’s movie masterpost
  • ahoyjay’s movie masterpost
  • theworldwillbedreaming’s 2014 resource masterpost
  • perchancetodance’s masterpost of masterposts
  • southerngothic’s ‘greatest cinematography masterpost’
  • lovegud’s book rec list/masterpost
  • bizarreismm’s creepy videos and horror movies masterpost
  • swagcola’s movie masterpost
  • hellyeahmasterpost’s steampunk movie masterpost
  • herhmione’s writing masterpost
  • resource post for trans women
  • bakrua’s 'literally everything; masterpost
  • vodkadean’s 'eveything you didn’t know you needed’ masterpost
  • masterpost of creepy wikipedia articles
  • diminishes’s ultimate teen movie masterpost (80’s to present)
  • icanttellyoubutiknowitsmine’s 2014 masterpost
  • rosydrops’s become an adult masterpost
  • ussromanov’s resource masterpost
  • another movie masterpost
  • nicois’s masterpost
  • remoslupin’s “the really useful bits’ masterpost
  • music masterpost for different moods
  • those animated Japanese emoticons masterpost
  • classic doctor who masterpost
  • not-so-scary halloween movies
  • halloween movie masterpost
  • broadway musicals masterpost
  • homestuck generators masterpost

tumblr stuff

  • how to do cool effects in text posts
  • more text tricks for posts
  • themes, icons, backgrounds, favicons, etc. masterpost
  • you can look at posts on a certain day
  • places to get rlly simple themes
  • the new photoset pixel sizes

cool gadgets and gizmos aplenty

  • things and stuff
  • phone charger that wont tear
  • cute winged scarfs!!!
  • fandom-based nail polish collections
  • fandom-based eyeshadow
  • funny desk-must-haves
  • hairbrush flask??
  • cute zodiac necklaces
  • rad labeling dog collars
  • best deodorant you’ll ever use
  • cute book clasp purse
  • make a ticket stub into a pillow!!
  • wallet ninja
  • apps
  • apps every productive student needs
  • The Rape Defender app!!!!
  • SafeTrek app!!
  • TalkTo app (social anxiety helper)
  • aggressive dude wont leave you alone?? feminist quote line!
  • websites and extensions
  • affordable dorm room furniture website
  • finding out art sources
  • cheap student travel flights
  • CreepFace
  • BeeLine reader
  • archieveposter!!!
  • post limit checker
  • WolframAlpha
  • Elf ears store
  • Amazon college kid’s prime
  • places to buy cheaper textbooks
  • how to find things you want for cheaper
  • GamePhobias
  • Duolingo
  • livefeed of porn searches??
  • unisex makeup company!!
  • reference manager for term papers
  • games
  • new cool MMO game you should totes play
  • drinking games??
  • alter-ego game
  • 90s games!!!
  • rad multi-fandom game
  • game that tells you what kind of thinker you are!!
  • become the god of the internet and remove trolls game
  • 100 running songs??
  • more running songs
  • studying playlist

thinks you can do to help others!!!

  • help puppies and kitties in need with 1 click
  • tiGERS IN DANGER
  • help people for different reasons
  • don’t bathe rabbits 
  • cat 'head pressing’ against walls?
  • dog CPR
  • cute undies that send pads to girls in need!!!

calm down friend

  • cute pixel games
  • feeling overwhelmed?
  • cute websites to remember
  • better ways to calm down others
  • for anxiety attacks
  • what to do if friend has panic attack
  • Making a "happy folder”
  • how to not talk to kids???
  • easing depression symptoms
  • more things to do
  • funny websites to use
  • lots of alternatives
  • international help lines
  • tumblr helps with suicide
  • more websites
  • cool game
  • dealing with depression
  • facts about anti-depressants
  • beating anxiety without medicine
  • helpful links masterpost!!
  • what  you feel affects your body temp
  • make sand art to help calm down
  • about panic/anxiety attacks
  • hobbies to reduce anxiety
  • helping someone with an anxiety attack
  • having a bad night?
  • what you SHOULD say to people dealing with disorders
  • think no one cares?
  • how to deal with a broken heart

life hacks and facts

  • life hacks post
  • life hacks post 2
  • life hacks post 3
  • life hacks post 4
  • life hacks post 5
  • life hacks post 6
  • life hacks post 7
  • life hacks post 8
  • psychology facts post
  • psychology facts post 2
  • psych2go post 3
  • ultrafacts post
  • ultrafacts post 2
  • studying ultrafacts post 3
  • pool life hacks??
  • clothing life hacks
  • clothing life hacks 2
  • bra lifehacks!!
  • packing hack
  • dog owners life hacks
  • winged eyeliner hack
  • Target shopper’s hacks
  • Chinese take out box life hack
  • math functions hack
  • makeup with spoon hack
  • losing weight tips
  • self defense tips!!!
  • self defense tips 2
  • cool parenting tips
  • period tips
  • tips and facts you never knew
  • useful websites
  • we have more than 5 senses???
  • 3 theories of time travel
  • 12 foods not to feed to a dog
  • dog’s sight vs humans
  • we’ve been eating fruit wrong lmao
  • 6 abs workouts that work better than crunches
  • 25 ways to show affection
  • 2014 full moon dates
  • stuff nobody tells you about getting an apartment
  • if we lost oxygen for 5 seconds
  • how long would it take to finish a tv show
  • list of band’s fanmail addresses

food-y things

  • apple pie inside of an apple
  • twisted pizza breadsticks
  • the cookie cup
  • giant fluffy pancake
  • cookie in a mug recipe
  • brownie in a mug recipe
  • pizza burger
  • buncha yummy food things
  • The Kim Possible 'Naco"
  • The Tea Wheel
  • Make ramen taste better
  • 36 homemade popiscle recipes
  • 18 recipes you can make in the microwave
  • s'mores stuffed pizza cookie
  • pinata cookies
  • strawberries and cream mug cake
  • starbucks drinks recipes
  • cinnamon pull aparts
  • Funfetti Stuffed Chocolate MM Cookie Cake
  • deep dish chocolate chip microwave cookie
  • 34 two-ingredient recipies
  • TARDIS cake
  • toffee apples
  • Kingdom Hearts II ice cream

drawing and writing things

  • paper to digital art
  • firealpaca art program!!
  • practice drawing poses
  • boot anatomy tutorial
  • coloring hair tutorial
  • glowy art tutorial
  • some art tutorial
  • arm tutorial 
  • girls and guys pose tutorial
  • another pose tutorial
  • more poses tutorials wow
  • drawing hands tutorial
  • pixel art tutorial
  • bunch of tutorials
  • drawing people tutorial
  • drawing heads tutorial
  • drawing Homestuck character’s hair
  • drawing Ariel
  • drawing eyes
  • drawing eyes 2
  • drawing boobs
  • drawing boobs lel
  • drawing rooms
  • drawin dat ass like
  • overlay tutorial
  • gif tutorials
  • coloring gifs
  • pulsing light effect
  • brush masterpost
  • hair colors
  • natural skin tone colors
  • folds in clothing and windblown things
  • simple tips to make your art look better
  • paint tools sai tips
  • tips for tablets
  • more art references
  • how to love your art
  • random drawing generator
  • writing
  • character development sheet
  • incontrovertible insult formula?
  • insult generator
  • character trait generator
  • homestuck troll generator
  • fictional world creator
  • using correct forms for french?
  • typing edit rules?
  • 'thy’ 'thou’ 'thee’ and 'thine’
  • royalty titles
  • cant find the right word?
  • family relations chart
  • writing body language
  • writing outlines
  • inflating and deflating word length
  • england vs us slang
  • eye color chart
  • more eye color names
  • 99 ways to beat writer’s block

how to’s and what to do’s

  • how to recognize artists by their paintings
  • how to track anons
  • how to tie a bowtie
  • how to tie a bowtie 2
  • turn off flashy gifs on tumblr
  • how to remove permanent marker from everything
  • how to help pay off your student loans with volunteer time
  • remove your information from this site now!!
  • how to break out of zipties
  • how to get rid of lint pills
  • how to delete tourists from your pictures
  • how to make a secret computer monitor
  • how to make a otp pendant
  • how to identify body language 
  • how to cut tomatoes effectively
  • how to color eggs with onion shells
  • how to do special effect stage makeup
  • how to disappear online
  • how to buy a good wig off of ebay
  • how to make a mini matchstick pistol
  • how to warped tour
  • how to make an 8-bit valentines day card
  • how to make a presentable art portfolio 
  • how to cover up tattoos
  • how to make your Mind Palace visible
  • how to balance a checkbook
  • how to make a tiny bow and arrow
  • how to make moss graffiti 
  • how to tie scarfs cutely
  • how to effectively pull an all nighter and do well on your exam
  • how to reblog long posts as text rather than links
  • how to pick locks
  • how to multiply large numbers in your head
  • how to make gradient and striped nails
  • how to build the perfect resume
  • how to cast and mold armor for cosplay
  • how to make invisible shoes for cosplay
  • cosplay makeup for guy characters
  • what to watch on netflix
  • learn Japanese cheat sheets c:
  • learn Korean in 15 minutes
  • learn Elvish
  • things to do with notebooks
  • be cremated into a vinyl record
  • 15 kid friendly scientific experiments
  • cool hair do’s
  • acne chart!!
  • college advice
  • binder help for trans guys

sex ed

  • contraceptive help
  • how to use a condom
  • 'ap sex ed’
  • sex positions???
  • Yvis’s facts about the va-jay-jay
Jared x Reader Pregnancy Head Cannons!!

Some Head cannons

Requested by: @averyto

Enjoy!


- You don’t plan on getting pregnant, you and Jared were married but still living in your small apartment. Your period was late this month, too late, way too late.

- You left for work early telling a still sleepy Jared you had a big project you were working on. He smiled pulling you into him in a half hug, he did this every morning. He’d stand in your small kitchen, wearing only his underwear riding low on his hips, and wait for the coffee to finish brewing. And when you’d inevitably show up next to him he’d pull you into a soft hug and kiss the top of your head.

- You smiled kissing his lips, you were in love with him and you knew he loved you, but you just hoped he could love the little human that may or may not be growing inside you.

- On your way to work you stopped at the store and bought three pregnancy test, you texted your friends who worked with you, in need of desperate help. (Y/Best/Friend) told you to buy three in case you need a tie breaker.

- Once you arrived at work your friends ushered you to the bathroom and made you take the first one. They consoled you while you waited, telling you that everything would be okay and that Jared would still love you. They also made you chug two water bottles

- At the end of the five minutes you check the first test, positive. You weren’t surprised but you were worried. How would you tell Jared? Your friends told you that maybe it’s a fluke and they others would be negative.

- They were wrong. It became hard to focus at work, being that there were three positive pregnancy tests in a ziplock bag in your purse. You wanted to be able to show them to Jared, just to make sure he’d believe you.

- Your drive home was tense, when the traffic was slow you yelled at it to move faster. Once it sped up you yelled at it to slow down. Your fingers tapped the wheel quickly, your free leg bounced rapidly, you were practically shaking.

- When you got home Jared was in the kitchen making dinner, you quietly walked up behind him and hugged him from behind.

- “Oh Jesus. You scared me baby,” he said putting down his ladle and pulling you into a hug. “How was work doll?”

- “Oh um it was fine, slow,”

- “Are you alright you look stressed, what’s eating you?” He asked laying his hand on your cheek

- You laughed dryly. Yeah. He could say you were stressed. His eyes widened at your empty laughter, you’d only worried him further. You walked to the bedroom you shared and took of your uncomfortable work clothes switching them out for one of Jared’s large shirts and a pair of fleece pants.

- while you were gone Jared prepared the table for an impromptu date night. Needless you say, you were overwhelmed with love. You instantly broke down into tears, the day finally snapping you.

- in between all of your tears and sniffles you confessed.

- “Jared. Jared please stop fussing. I have to tell you something. No no no I’m not asking for a divorce, Squish. I’m. Im. Please don’t be mad. No no no I didn’t cheat on you. I would never. JARED. I’m pregnant. And before you ask it’s definitely yours.”

- “IM GONNA BE A DAD. IM GOING TO BE A FATHER. IM GOing to be a father. (y/n) i dont think im ready for this kind of responsibility. NO NO NO IM NOT LEAVING YOU THIS KID WILL BE OURS EVEN IF IT IS MAINLY RAISED ON MEMES, baby I love you so much, nothing has mad me happier than this news!”

-ON TO SOME HEADCANNONY SHIT!

- Jared instantly becomes 103838282782x more worried about you
• didn’t make it home on time? Worried texts

• you were driving and couldn’t answer the texts? A worried phone call

- At first you found this endearing but after awhile you were tired of it, especially as you got late into your pregnancy and were VERY V E R Y testy.

- He tried to act like the baby inside you didn’t effect him emotionally but the moment you start showing he squeals and leave a kiss on the bump.

- On his way home from work everyday he texts you asking what you’re hungry for, at first is normal stuff ice cream, chips, candies. But than it gets weird. You were seven months along when you asked for dragon fruit, Necco Wafer candies, and a shit load of hamburgers from Wendy’s

- You start calling the baby squosh after Jared’s nickname Squish. When he finds out he starts calling it that too.

- He loves to gently rub and leave kisses on your bump, and one day you woke up from your nap to find him talking to it “you know Squosh I’ll love you no matter what you are a girl, a boy, a Apache attack helicopter? Doesn’t matter to me, as long as you’re not a fan of the Despicable Me franchise,”

- You both decided not to figure out the gender until birth, wanting to keep it a surprise.

- On the day you were due Jared packed a bag of things for you in the hospital. And he packed it so early in the morning, he waited impatiently for you to tell him you were in labor, but you didn’t until three days later while he was in the shower.

- your contractions were fucking horrible, Jared actually started crying because you were in so much pain and he hated that he couldn’t do anything about it.

- During delivery Jared held your hand and told you to power through and you’ll be okay, you did not want him to keep talking “FUCK YOU JARED THIS IS YOUR FAULT, LEARN HOW TO USE A CONDOM KLEINMAN!” You screamed pushing again

- somewhere along the line he definitely made a “now there are gonna be two people in this house calling me daddy” joke

- you brought the baby home the next afternoon, Evan, the god father, watched them while Jared helped you take your first post pregnancy shower.

- He takes care of the baby ever night until they can be moved into the nursery, than it’s a “I went last time it’s your turn now” situation.

- He loved the baby as much as he love you and he actually started crying one day watching you breast feed them, he was overwhelmed with the realization that your so strong and will be such an amazing mother.

- god he loves you so much and would literally die to save you and your child.

- be good to him he needs you.


REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!