how to succeed in love

Advice of the day

Know yourself.

Know when to push yourself, know when it’s too much too fast. Know what you want and what you don’t want in your life. Know how to say no. Know what you look like when you are losing yourself, know how to bring yourself back.

You just can’t rely on anyone else to love you and know you the way you can love and know yourself.

Ways to un-stick a stuck story
  • Do an outline, whatever way works best. Get yourself out of the word soup and know where the story is headed.
  • Conflicts and obstacles. Hurt the protagonist, put things in their way, this keeps the story interesting. An easy journey makes the story boring and boring is hard to write.
  • Change the POV. Sometimes all it takes to untangle a knotted story is to look at it through different eyes, be it through the sidekick, the antagonist, a minor character, whatever.
  • Know the characters. You can’t write a story if the characters are strangers to you. Know their likes, dislikes, fears, and most importantly, their motivation. This makes the path clearer.
  • Fill in holes. Writing doesn’t have to be linear; you can always go back and fill in plotholes, and add content and context.
  • Have flashbacks, hallucinations, dream sequences or foreshadowing events. These stir the story up, deviations from the expected course add a feeling of urgency and uncertainty to the narrative.
  • Introduce a new mystery. If there’s something that just doesn’t add up, a big question mark, the story becomes more compelling. Beware: this can also cause you to sink further into the mire.
  • Take something from your protagonist. A weapon, asset, ally or loved one. Force him to operate without it, it can reinvigorate a stale story.
  • Twists and betrayal. Maybe someone isn’t who they say they are or the protagonist is betrayed by someone he thought he could trust. This can shake the story up and get it rolling again.
  • Secrets. If someone has a deep, dark secret that they’re forced to lie about, it’s a good way to stir up some fresh conflict. New lies to cover up the old ones, the secret being revealed, and all the resulting chaos.
  • Kill someone. Make a character death that is productive to the plot, but not “just because”. If done well, it affects all the characters, stirs up the story and gets it moving.
  • Ill-advised character actions. Tension is created when a character we love does something we hate. Identify the thing the readers don’t want to happen, then engineer it so it happens worse than they imagined.
  • Create cliff-hangers. Keep the readers’ attention by putting the characters into new problems and make them wait for you to write your way out of it. This challenge can really bring out your creativity.
  • Raise the stakes. Make the consequences of failure worse, make the journey harder. Suddenly the protagonist’s goal is more than he expected, or he has to make an important choice.
  • Make the hero active. You can’t always wait for external influences on the characters, sometimes you have to make the hero take actions himself. Not necessarily to be successful, but active and complicit in the narrative.
  • Different threat levels. Make the conflicts on a physical level (“I’m about to be killed by a demon”), an emotional level (“But that demon was my true love”) and a philosophical level (“If I’m forced to kill my true love before they kill me, how can love ever succeed in the face of evil?”).
  • Figure out an ending. If you know where the story is going to end, it helps get the ball rolling towards that end, even if it’s not the same ending that you actually end up writing.
  • What if? What if the hero kills the antagonist now, gets captured, or goes insane? When you write down different questions like these, the answer to how to continue the story will present itself.
  • Start fresh or skip ahead. Delete the last five thousand words and try again. It’s terrifying at first, but frees you up for a fresh start to find a proper path. Or you can skip the part that’s putting you on edge – forget about that fidgety crap, you can do it later – and write the next scene. Whatever was in-between will come with time.
There’s no such thing as what you ‘should’ be doing with your life. If you’re not holding yourself back from something you really want to try, and you enjoy the way you spend your day, then you’re a smashing success.
—  Lori Deschene

Why I love Zelo.

  • Junhong’s always so eager to learn, He’s ambitious, inspired and hard working. He’s completely open to try new things, practices his English so much for us, and has truly delevoped into an all rounded individual.
  • Unlike most people his age, Our boy went through immense ordeals. He matured fast, but he still holds on to that child in him. Leave him around B.A.P to be babied and how much ever he may fight it, he loves it.
  • Not only can this boy rap and dance and sing and write, there’s uniqueness and individuality in everything he does. He puts so much character into his music and artistic expression.
  • He has all these little performance nuances that just enhance everything he does. A personal favourite of mine is the habit of putting his free hand behind his back while rapping.
  • Oh god, he’s kind. His heart is overflowing with love. He loves his hyungs, he loves his fans, he loves his adorable dog. He’s always softspoken, but doesn’t shy away from getting mischievous too.
  • Nobody can speak against his stage presence and his general aura. This tall boy’s got it all and he knows how to use it. He’s trying to be proud of his imperfections too and I love that.
  • Great, I’m emotional, I’m just going to end this by saying I love Junhong, I love everything he is and everything he stands for. I love his eyes, his blinking, his dimples, his cute lil teeth, his (jacked) arms, his mile long legs. I love his kindness, his creativity, his urge to succeed and how much he loves us.
  • HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUNHONG.

How to get through a breakup

Dedicated to my beautiful friend, who has more love in her than fish in the sea.

  1. Take time to process it. Before making any irrational desions. Acknowledge it’s over, try figure out what went wrong and accept it. Sometimes brushing it off immediately, leads to a breakdown of emotions later.
  2. Distract yourself. Only do this after you’ve accepted it’s over. It’s over and you are sad sad sad! Fill your days with projects and goals. Use all the energy you used to put into the relationship into yourself. Start working out how you always wish you had, use the emotions you feel to make something. Paint, draw- write a fucking book.
  3. Spend time with the people who love you unconditionally. Make more platonic friends. Find new people and appreciate the people who have stuck by you. You still have love to give and love to receive- love even harder don’t let this break you.
  4. Don’t forget to take care of yourself. Remember who you were before the relationship, what do you miss about that? How have you grown since the relationship. You don’t need anyone to complete you. As cliche as it is: date yourself. Go to the cinema alone, out to coffee, dress up and go out for dinner.
  5. Remember that even if everything seems like it’s over- it’s not. You still have so much to do. There’s people out there you don’t expect to meet and don’t expect to be so important to you but you’ll meet them and they will be.

Romantic love isn’t the only kind of love. It’s not always the best kind of love.

I wish I could put into words how much I adore joji and how proud I am of him for bein out here and makin an even bigger name for himself and creating such dope content and music while still being a genuinely lovely person but I don’t kno how to properly convey any emotion ever so i’ll just lay here and listen to the entirety of pink season for the millionth time while staring at my ceiling in awe

anonymous asked:

Now that is canon that lance is keith's stability (though that was Shiro), what will happen if something happened to Lance? ~Mist

I wasn’t at the con but I’m pretty sure that Lance being Keith’s stability is a new thing. As in, a thing that specifically started in s3 - because before that Shiro was Keith’s stability!! I mean, Keith literally got kicked out of the Garrison after the failure of the Kerberos mission. When he found out about his Galra heritage it was Shiro he wanted to see, when he departed for the Weblum mission it was Shiro’s hug that cheered him up, when Shiro disappeared after s2 it was his loss that made him put Voltron at risk.

However, all of that changed in s3. And it was a huge difference to before. Because, see, Lance has always balanced Keith out (remember the mission on the Balmera) but he has never tried to be Keith’s support. But once he realized that Keith is under a lot more emotional pressure than he expected, he just-

“Hey man, listen. We all miss Shiro. I remember what a thrill it was just to meet him for the first time when the two of us carried him out of that Garrison hospital.” […] “You’re not the only one hurting, man. We’re all right there with you. But you know that he would be the first one to tell us that we have to move on.” […] “I know you’re right. It’s time to figure out how to reform Voltron.”

“I can’t replace Shiro! You guys were right, I’m the loner. I’m not the leader Shiro thought I was.” “Keith, no one can replace Shiro. But the Black Lion wouldn’t choose anybody it didn’t feel was worthy to lead Voltron. I respect its choice and you should too.” “…but who’s gonna fly the red lion?”

“I’m okay but we can’t fight this guy alone.” “And you won’t have to.”

“Keith, we have to go back for Allura.” “Keith, you are splitting up the team!” “Keith, don’t do this!!” [and Keith actually listens, if only for a moment]

“This is all my fault. I followed him right into this trap. Everyone warned me but I didn’t listen. I put the entire team in jeopardy.” “Yeah, you kinda did. …but now we gotta fix it.” “You’re right. Let’s go.”


The thing about Lance is that he always seems to know what to say to Keith. If you look at his lines, you’ll realize that he keeps emphasizing that Keith isn’t alone. I doubt that Lance has figured out Keith’s abandonment issues but he’s unconsciously helping him through them. That emotional support is important to Keith. Lance finally offers Keith the friendship that he has always wanted and he is very quick to accept it. 

But Lance is more than just emotional support. He also never sugarcoats things, something that Keith undoubtedly appreciates. We know that Keith dislikes his temper a lot, he tries not to rely on it when he can help it (he even gets happy when people offer him an alternative like in the Balmera mission in s1). There’s that and he values honesty - he has never put any kind of effort into learning how to lie and usually takes things the team tells him at face value. That makes Lance telling him that they miss Shiro alongside Keith but they still have their mission to complete exactly the right thing to say. 

So yeah. Lance appeals to both Keith’s emotional and his rational side. And that shows - Keith voluntarily opened up to him in the third episode when he messed up. That’s a huuuge step for Mr. ‘I Guess I Have Some Walls Up’ :P Lance became Keith’s stability and did a great job on it, so great in fact that Shiro/Kuron can’t really take that role back:

When he tried to reassure Keith that he makes a good leader Keith wouldn’t listen. There isn’t a prolonged eye contact that ends with his eyes closing and a deep breath in, there isn’t a hopeful glance upwards, there is no change to how he was before. Shiro left him completely unaffected and it’s disturbing tbh.

So yeah. From what it looks like, Lance will continue being Keith’s stability for a while - at least if he tries. He might feel inadequate or try to give that role back to Shiro/Kuron, just as he was ready to give up his lion(s). I PRAY THAT THAT WON’T HAPPEN BUT VLD LIKES BREAKING OUR HEARTS SO ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ cries

If anything happened to Lance, Keith wouldn’t take it well. I’m not sure if Keith is aware of how important Lance became to him, I’m not even sure if Lance himself is aware of it, but I can’t imagine Keith taking Lance’s loss well. He wouldn’t have taken it well before the bonding and he certainly won’t take it well now. I can imagine that Shiro/Kuron would (as mentioned above) try to take the “stability” role back but I can’t tell how successful he’d be with that. 


[The next in line for Keith’s stability role seems to be Allura btw - wait no hear me out! :’D Voltron’s legs in general are “the stable ones”, the ones that are meant to ground the others. Allura tried cheering Keith up before his first mission in Black and Keith tried to comfort Allura after they got back from the other dimension, so between her and Hunk I think it’d be her!! Hunk didn’t have many moments with Keith in s3.] 

Find the courage to keep on pursuing what you believe in, no matter how many people fail to want you to succeed. You are worthy of happiness, love and peace, do whatever it takes for that to be achieved. There will be days where your patience runs thin but do not give up on what keeps you alive. Keep chasing the things that call for you and never give up on your dreams.
— 

When dreams seem tough by Amy Kennedy

23/03/17

Like this? Check out my book!

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If you think that I’m here to get in your way, while you bookahs fighting the dragon… well, you are absolutely correct. Keep that giant icicle busy, will you? I have some work to do here. Chop-chop, the clock is ticking.

Listen

SEVENTEEN Seungkwan supporting NU’EST ‘Where You At” on V-live Radio!

“Where You At is really good! By our NU’EST W Hyungs~“  

NU’TEEN supporting each other is the best! And because I know how long these guys have known each other, and how genuinely they want each other to succeed truly warms my heart as I love both groups and have known them for a real long time <3

youtube

Whoever gets offended by this I know you’re one of the people that got upset he liked that models photo and commented horrible stuff on her account. The fact that he unfollowed people just because his fans were saying that he’s theirs. NO.UH UH. He isn’t yours. Do you not see how embarrassing that could have been for him? That’s putting a bad facade on the fandom.
Your true fans love you @tomholland2013 , we support you and want you to know that you can be a free person and not let those fake fans control you. We love you for who you are and how far you’re going to succeed as Spider-Man. We love you for you Tom xx
I’m grabbing a new bottle of wine to open up because I’m going to drink to how great you are ❤️🕷💙🍷🍾

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they’ve faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you’re 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

—Mary Schmich, “Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young”

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.

The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.

Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they’ve faded.

But trust me, in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, The kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old.

And when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you’re 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it.  Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me: I’m the sunscreen.

—  Mary Schmich, “Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young”