how many times am i going to have to clean that

Ridiculous yet effective ways to deal with Executive Dysfunction

Dealing with executive dysfunction and ADHD becomes so much easier when you stop trying to do things the way you feel like you should be able to do them (like everyone else) and start finding ways that actually work for you, no matter how “silly” or “unnecessary” they seem.

For years my floor was constantly covered in laundry. Clean laundry got mixed in with dirty and I had to wash things twice, just making more work for myself. Now I just have 3 laundry bins: dirty (wash it later), clean (put it away later), and mystery (figure it out later). Sure, theoretically I could sort my clothes into dirty or clean as soon as I take them off and put them away straight out of the dryer, but realistically that’s never going to be a sustainable strategy for me.

How many garbage bins do you need in a bedroom? One? WRONG! The correct answer is one within arms reach at all times. Which for me is three. Because am I really going to get up to blow my nose when I’m hyperfocusing? NO. In allergy season I even have an empty kleenex box for “used tissues I can use again.” Kinda gross? Yeah. But less gross than a snowy winter landscape of dusty germs on my desk.

I used to be late all the time because I couldn’t find my house key. But it costs $2.50 and 3 minutes to copy a key, so now there’s one in my backpack, my purse, my gym bag, my wallet, my desk, and hanging on my door. Problem solved.

I’m like a ninja for getting pout the door past reminder notes without noticing. If I really don’t want to forget something, I make a physical barrier in front of my door. A sticky note is a lot easier to walk past than a two foot high cardboard box with my wallet on top of it.

Executive dysfunction is always going to cause challenges, but often half the struggle is trying to cope by pretending not to have executive dysfunction, instead of finding actual solutions.

“hello,” the dark lord said, “i need a library card.”

“everyone needs a library card,” the librarian said brightly, sliding a form across the desk. “fill this out.”

the dark lord produced her own elaborately plumed quill from the depths of her robes and scrawled her name in handwriting that was completely illegible but seemed to whisper the secrets of the dark from the blinding white page. “yes, but i need mine in order to take over the tri-kingdom area.”

the librarian’s polite smile barely faltered. “funny, the last dark lord to try that didn’t bother with a card.”

“yes, and do you see that fool currently ruling our kingdom? no. of course not. utterly ridiculous, to attempt to take over any size country without a library card, much less an intermediate-sized one like this.” she accepted the thin plastic card with a gracious flourish of her gloved hand.

the librarian, adding the new card’s number to the database, privately agreed, but chose not to say anything.


the librarian balanced the pile of pulled books under one elbow and held the list of call numbers in their hand for easy consultation. “intermediate spell casting for grades three and four,” they murmured, running fingers along the peeling spines until they found it. “willing to bet that’s sorrel’s request.”

they fit the large, paperbound book under their elbow and moved on, checking the list again. “magical creatures encyclopedia, L through M. that’s jackaby trying to finish the entire set by midsummer.” they would get that one last to carry it around the shortest amount of time.

“next — the complete guide to raising the dead.” they paused in front of the row of shelves with the right call numbers. they could guess the requester of that one too, but knew better than to say it out loud.


the return slot thunked loudly as it swung open and closed, having swallowed the returned books with a wet gulp.

“good morning,” the dark lord said pleasantly as she looked up from sliding her books in — or as pleasantly as “good morning” could sound when it was uttered by a voice that sounded like gravel being chewed to pieces by the jaws of a large monster.

“it is, very,” the librarian said crisply, conjuring a clean handkerchief for the still-slobbering return slot.

the mouth just visible under the dark lord’s enormous cloak hood curved into a scythe’s blade smile, but she said nothing else.

“did you enjoy your books?” the librarian asked, since she wasn’t moving and there were no other people waiting (most likely because of the dark lord standing there).

the hood nodded up and down. “extremely. especially the taped lecture by doctor dramidius ardorius of the dark arts institute.”

“well, we have many more taped lectures. i especially recommend the one on the healing powers of tea.” they tilted their head in a now get out sign. the poor steam-powered self-checkout contraption would get overheated if people were too scared to check out at the front desk.

they didn’t really expect the dark lord to take the recommendation seriously, but the next day they noticed the cloaked, hooded specter glide out the door with the taped lecture on magic-infused herbal teas tucked between a CD of dark chants and a step-by-step art book on drawing occult symbols.


“you give good recommendations,” the dark lord said with a shrug when the librarian raised their eyes from the front desk’s computer to the shadows of her hood.

the librarian wasn’t sure what to say. “you seem to take up quite a lot of my time.”

“i’m only a simple library patron,” the dark lord replied in a saintly voice that resembled a dragon coughing up a partially digested house. “do you enjoy mermaid song?”

“yes. you can find the library’s collection in the CD section over there.” they looked pointedly back down at the computer.

“i hear there’s a concert on the shore tomorrow evening.”

“perhaps we’ll get a recording of it.”


the dark lord continued taking out books on various unsavory topics. the librarian continued suggesting books on healing, positive thinking, and community service. the dark lord seemed more amused with each visit. her smile was almost charming, once you got past the long, sharp teeth.


the librarian was trying to go about their usual morning ritual of pulling books that had been requested the night before, but the dark lord wouldn’t stop making faces at them from behind gaps in the shelves. she seemed to find it hilarious. the librarian hadn’t decided yet if they were amused or annoyed.

“ooh, look at this,” the dark lord said, pulling a sturdy but beaten up board book featuring a werewolf mid-transformation on the cover from the shelf. “this was my favorite when i was just a little menace.”

“somehow i’m not surprised.”

the dark lord tucked the book into the ridiculous basket made of a large skull that floated alongside her. “didn’t you have a favorite picture book when you were little?”

“Barker the Sentient Book End,” the librarian said promptly. “i screamed for it every night until someone read it to me, long after i’d already memorized each page.”

the dark lord cooed, sounding like a cross between an owl and something eating an owl. “adorable. i knew you had a little monster in you somewhere.”

the librarian crossly debated denying being a monster at all or pointing out they had actual kraken blood in them.


they should have guessed how close the dark lord was from how good her mood was, but it wasn’t until they arrived at work on monday that the librarian heard the news.

“the newest dark lord managed to overthrow the faeyrie monarchy last night. something about combining traditional herbal spells with a newfangled mental magic based on the power of willful thinking… or something. the news reporter mentioned the use of mermaid song in a mild kind of mind control, i think? i wasn’t listening. the good news is, our budget stays in place.”

the librarian contemplated hurling the can of bookmarks across the room, but concluded that it would be both unprofessional and unsatisfying. they settled for aggressively stamping returned, only slightly saliva-covered books with red ink.


the phone clicked loudly. “public library, how can i help you?”

“by taking my offer,” the dark lord said, slightly hesitant voice like a rock slide that wasn’t sure it was ready to slide. “the royal library in the capital needs a new head librarian.”

“why’s that?” the librarian spun in their new swivel chair, tangling the phone cord while they were at it, thinking they wouldn’t want to leave so soon after getting it.

there was a cough like the ocean spitting out a new island. “erm, hmm, last one got… eaten. tragic. these things happen when you’re very, very small, you know.”

“so i’ve heard.” the librarian stretched the phone cord and watched it bounce back. “well, i’m happy where i am.”

“well.” her voice was more disappointed than they’d expected. “it’s a very nice library, you know. large selection of mermaid song in the CD section.”

“the royal library is part of our system. i can request any materials from there that i want to be delivered here.”

a pause. the dark lord had not considered this. “well, maybe i’ll take the royal library out of the system.”

“you wouldn’t dare disrupt the workings of our very intricate library system set up at the dawn of time.”

“maybe i would!”

“no.”

“fine. i wouldn’t.”

the librarian swiveled some more, wrapping the cord around with them until it ran out of give and spun them in the other direction. “would you like to grab a coffee sometime?”

“yes,” the dark lord said, voice too surprised to resemble anything in particular. “i can travel down meet you tomorrow morning.”

“don’t you have things to do?”

they could sense the shrug from the other end of the line. “i’ll move the capital to your town. i can do that, you know. i’m the supreme ruler of the tri-kingdom area.”

“yes,” the librarian agreed, un-spinning to return the phone to its cradle. “just don’t forget who gave you the library card.”

ARMY 4th: BTS ROLLING PAPERS TO EACH OTHER:

Jungkook’s rolling paper by the members: 

Namjoon: You have no mental sharpness but you are good looking. You are like the main character of an anime. you have so much passion. your eyes and body are massive. You really love Muji Tea. Number 1 at making our team’s average age younger. Jeon Jungkook <3 the ‘guk’ (Broth/soup) that I love the most? Bean paste soup ~ <3

Jin: Jungkook turn on your speakers quieter at home. Come with me to the water park again. Let’s not forget (to go)

Yoongi: Jungkook you are trying to write music lately. If you have something you don’t know, use the internet. I am not a professor/genius. To be honest. I am too lazy to help you hahaha. I’m joking. I will help you a lot. So gain strength. Hwaiting!! (a cheering)

Hoseok: Jungkook-ah!!! Turn down the volume of the speakers in our dorm. I can hear it even in my room. -_- You pig!!

Jimin: Just continue growing up like you have until now. Just don’t grow up taller. Just grow up kind.

Taehyung: Jungkook-ah. It’s hyung … really I’m hyung (He is saying that he is older than him) … you became nicer and gentler lately. *acting cute* let’s have fun/play together.

Taehyung’s rolling paper by the members

Namjoon: You are so loud when you play (computer)  games. you bother me but I also snore so I understand you. You are the best looking these days. You are like a farmer. You were born as an idol. You are glued to Gucci. you are so innocent/pure. You have no mental sharpness (not able to catch into things quickly) but you are so cute. So lovable. Kim Taehyung <3 the 'hyung’ that I love the most? a-hyung <3

Jin: When you’re playing games please be a little bit quieter. But you have become brighter these days and that makes me very happy. I hope you make the world brighter with your brightness.

yoongi: It’s right that you do everything to the best of your abilities.try your hardest. It’s right that you play games very passionately. Since you do everything very passionately, let’s passionately enjoy music and games too. Hwaiting.

Hoseok: taehyung-ah hyung always loves you ~~ <3 <3  stop sleeping with the air conditioner on. You will get sick ~ <3 <3 stop playing games so much ~ <3 <3 study with hyung instead <3 <3

Jimin: I don’t know since when but you seem to have become more like an adult, but you are also always like a kid (satori). My friend, stop playing games so much before I go throw your computer away. Wake up when I wake you up my friend. I will shove my hands in your armpits. (drew V as the heart figure he always draws himself as). thank you my friend (In tiny letters).

Jungkook: V hyung! Hyung, stop biting me it hurts so much I am going to die. I always feel this way but you are so good looking.

Jimin’s rolling paper by the members

Namjoon; You are sometimes cunning but also sexy, short, attractive when you dance, you always work so hard, you like billiard, you changed the most, but you aren’t obvious Chimchim <3 THE 'Chim’ (acupuncture) that I like the most? Poison acupuncture. 

Jin: Jimin-ah you are an angel. I will do a three lettered acrostic poem using your name. park: In park’s family something good happened. Ji: You are a very cool friend. Min: Min Yoongi 

Yoongi: Jimin you are always doing things to the best of your abilities and that’s so charismatic. Let’s be together for a very long time. I applaud your hard work. thank you.

Hoseok: Jimin-ah our Jiminie who is the most attractive in the entire world ~~ <3 <3 when you go back to our dorm today, please clean the things on your desk ~~<3 <3 have strength!!

Taehyung: Jimin-ah~ even if you do aegyo (act cute) to my eyes you are not cute at all ~ do it to a certain amount ~ but when I see that cuteness thank you *acting cute* 

Jungkook: jimin hyung! be thankful that you are older than me. I am kidding, hyung you are always shining!!! Rice cake (jimin’s nickname) forever!!!

Namjoon’s rolling paper by the members:

Jin: Mon-ah I pick up a lot of things that you drop on the plane for you. I wonder how you have so many friends that are like moms around you. But you are cool.

Yoongi: Our eternal leader Rap Monster. Even though I don’t say it I respect you a lot. please always gain strength hwaithing. Thank you.

Hoseok: My center!! My supportive friend Rap Mon!! Namjoon~~~should we go for chicken and beer??

Jimin: A person that drops everything x 18. Stop dropping your phone hyung. You look so cool when you do solo stages. You are the number 1 coolest person when you are on stage. When you are off stage you are the number 1 dummy.  

Taehyung: Watching our leader who’s always cool, I learn something every day. Continue teaching me composing and producing and stop dropping things ~!! Kim Namjoon is the awesome and the best looking.

Jungkook: To RM. you are sleeping behind me right now and you look very very handsome. please continue showing us your cool side <3

Hoseok’s rolling paper by the members

Namjoon: You are often like a horse, but you pull us like a horse. You are like an angel 1004-9 (sounds like “you’re like an angel” in Korean). the most professional. When I see you my heart feels at ease. you dress nicely. Your shoulders got bigger. You’re very neat. You work hard to make songs lately. The point of our choreography. Jung Hoseok <3 the 'seok’ that I like the most is? Kim Jiseok hyung <3 (making a joke about liking another actor with 'seok’ in his name)

Jin: Hoba, your existence guides/leads my path. you teach me dancing and if I’m about to go down the wrong path you yell at me. You are scary :( I’m sorry I was wrong :(

Yoongi: Your bright energy always gives us hope. I hope you always stay bright and hopeful.

Jimin: You are a cool hyung whether it’s on stage or off stage. you’re such a perfect roommate that people who use their bedrooms alone don’t make me jealous. Sometimes you’re really like an adult and sometimes you are such a silly hyung. You are a hyung that always goes shopping with me. you are a hyung that’s brighter than anyone but also a hyung that gets tired faster than anyone. you are a hyung that loves seafood that I can’t eat. you are a hyung that’s always always loud. You are a hyung that always makes fun of me but also tells me that I’m cool. let’s not be sick.

Taehyung: Hoseok hyung you are someone that makes me laugh. You are someone that gives me joy. you are a hyung that takes care of me. I’m always thankful and I love you. Our hope.

Jungkook: Hope hyung. You are always a bright energy! Thank you for always making the environment happy. I’m catching up to your producing!

Yoongi’s rolling paper by the members: 

Namjoon: I wish you would gain some strength. when I look at you sometimes, you really are good looking. You are often very attractive lately. Your body is very weak, you are like a grandpa. I don’t know since when but you started wearing only black clothing. You got a bit more tanned so you are like brown sugar now. Your music is cool. MinSuga who is important to BTS <3 The 'ga’ that I like the most is? Shim Chunga (an old Korean folk tale)

Jin: Yoongi-ah you are my roommate, even when we marry let’s live together and be roommates how is that? 

Hoseok: Suga hyung!! I always have a thankful heart towards you ~~ <3 <3 I am also thankful for the gift you gave me recently <3 <3 <3 I anticipate you hyung ~~<3 I will give you a birthday gift this time ~ !! <3

Jimin: It makes me happy seeing you laugh often. Always stay this way. Don’t faint when you get older and do extraneous activities. you are very attractive when you perform these days.

Taehyung: A hyung that is pretty doing many things, and smiling. Don’t be sick, always be healthy, and make only good memories. The best smile angel of the universe Min Yoongi hwaiting (cheering)

Jungkook: suga hyung. let’s go eat lamb skewers one day. let’s lose weight first though!!!

Jin’s rolling paper by the members

Namjoon: Your mental age is like 2.6 years old, but you love eating. When you drive, when you play the guitar, when you are good at things at times, you are the most attractive. Your age worth is -99999999 won. You are often cute. You were a lot more attractive when we debuted, but you are still good looking. Kim Seok-jin <3 the 'jin’ that I love the most is? Crane wing formation (in Korean)

Yoongi: Jin hyung please act your age … I’m joking. It’s fun seeing you so bright lately! Thank you!!

Hoseok: Jin hyung that I love. I’m so glad that you are the oldest hyung in our team ~~~ !! please act your age though!!~<3<3

Jimin: I’m thankful that you are you. You’re the funniest out of all of us. I think this often lately, but you’re really good looking. You’re also like an old man though … also like a child … also like a fool … also like an angel … Thank you hyung.

Taehyung: Jin hyung please come back to the time when you were good looking~!! Now *sigh* .. never mind .. I like you. also, hyung you match short hair a lot. everything Jin does is good. have strength always!

jungkook: Jin hyung … It’s so tiring stooping to your level but when I see you it’s so fun and joyful … please remain that way. Aja! Aja! hwaiting (cheering).

Cr rosoidai 
That took me like forever to write. Hope you enjoy it ^^ @mimibtsghost

🌙 growing up with an eclectic witch mom 🌙

Originally posted by lucifers-queen

* getting flowers for every holiday. every.one.
* so. many. herbs. (honestly like a big ass cupboard)
* going crystal shopping together (and spending too much money and time there) (imagine my dad crying in the corner)
* flowers in every room in the house. every.
* so many rose quartz stones (because i’m born in may)
* our house is filled with candles
* drawing a protective sigil over our door every new years evening
* “i accidentally spent 300€ at the florists and im not even regretting it.” (actual quote)
* cutting my hair only at new moon
* going to medieval festivals because they are hella cool
* with like proper outfit and shit
* no idea for a present? herbs.
* or plants.
* or candles.
* bonus points if they are colour coordinated
* celebrating samhain, ostara etc
* living for the autumn season
* convincing my dad that “yes we need that cat. totally.”
* srsly how is he not going crazy
* explaining my friends it’s not weed, it’s sage.
* cleaning spells while cleaning the house
* discussing herbs for spells in shops and earning weird stares
* huge ass, gorgeous garden
* “go water the flowers.”
* “go mow the lawn.”
* “don’t discuss with the mother witch.”
* she sends me videos at 3am how to cut the cherry tree. why. i cry.
* water bottles out of glass with energising crystals on the ground
* her grimoire is so beautiful
* like srsly her handwriting has me crying.

but most important: knowing that whenever id wanted to stop being a part of all this, it would have been okay. my dad is not a witch, and that’s okay.
for me witchcraft is just a part of my life and i love it and am proud to have a witch mom ♥️

youtube

I first saw Woodstock running across a turnpike we were turning onto late one dark night in Peachtree Georgia Atlanta. Whilst we were shooting Lawless. He was a stray. 11 weeks old. Oh No we thought. Quickly Go get that dog not even sure it was a dog. Actually.  We stopped the car. It was pitch black literally. I used my phone to light the road in case a car came round the turnpike and couldn’t see me. And malletted me. And I tried to cover some ground but he was fast.  I watched this thing Running towards the highway in the pitch black making good speed towards the cars and lorries and I remember seeing what were its floppy ears bouncing towards the traffic. That dogs had it I thought. I couldn’t make out how big it was what breed it was? Nothing  just those two ears flapping away above a frantic bundle. Hurtling away from us towards impending doom that was for certain. Whatever it was had no road sense and was tearing away. I panicked a little because I couldn’t help it had no name to shout and now it was close to the freeway. I put my fingers to my mouth and I whistled. Loud as I could. The whistle pierced the black. And It stopped the dog dead in its tracks. Then it turned and set eyes on me in one swift movement the ears about faced and the dog decided to run straight at me in the darkness all flashes of teeth and snarling And shrieking. Fuck this I thought that’s not a fkn dog. What am I doing. It ran straight at me and hit me around the legs I couldn’t see but I could hear the distress and I reached down thinking I’m going to get bitten. It was so noisy shrieking. I snatched out expecting to feel teeth and grabbed a fist full of soft neck fur lifted what was actually an incredibly light weight up to my face and shone my phone at it. It was a very small bundle literally sagging from its neck fur with two big brown eyes staring straight into mine. Terrified and utterly quiet. When I got back to the car and sat in my seat he lay on my shoulder and fell asleep. And snored clearly he’d been through a lot. And now the ordeal was seemingly over enough for him to relax. Jessica asked me was he a girl or a boy. Its a boy I said. How do you know. Erm… I can feel his Woodstock. great !!! let’s call him Woodstock!!! And so it was. He was covered in dogshit. Now so was I. And we rode and We took him straight to the pet store to clean him up and buy him well things.., lots of things things dogs need and we walked the aisles the three of us letting him
Choose toys and his lead and his collar. I’ll
Never forget that night. It was wonderful. One minute he was almost dead next terrified. Then picked up by strangers then after He had a power nap in the car, the next he’s walking with his bandy leg John Wayne strut under the strip lighted aisles of this massive pet store happy and playful.
He wore a red bandana that night and from then on and drank religiously from the toilet throughout the night despite having a few bowls of water in the apartment he was every inch a survivor.  He wasnt house broken it didn’t matter we were outdoors mostly and He ate through trailer doors and made many friends and Pnut had him on the lead off set and He became our onset dog  I will always be eternally grateful to Georgia. It gave me the greatest of joys of being a dog owner  And the bestest of friends after Max had passed Woody arrived He was 11 weeks old approx. The first morning we had him. He ate a turd and we chased him to drop it but he gobbled it down because he must have thought we wanted to eat it. So he ate it as fast as he could. We just wanted him to eat some real food. He now had plenty. But there was a survivor in him. That was clear he had had to eat what he could and from then on it was clear he had food issues. But he would never go hungry again. His nickname was Yamaduki. Because he literally yammed down a duki. So Woodstock Yamaduki was his full name. Woody Thomas later Woody two shoes and Wu for short.

Woody came back to the Uk after Jess’s parents kindly looked after him to avoid quarantine they house trained him. He had my tshirt from Warrior. I picked him up from them in California when I shot Dark Knight and thanked them. He hadn’t forgotten me and despite the tireless efforts and hard work that Jessica’s Mum and husband had put into Woody he heard my whistle again and turned and ran at me and didn’t look back. I felt for them but secretly I was very happy that my friend and I were reconnected.  We all had a picnic we jumped into a lake Woody too and then it was clear Woody couldn’t swim and I hauled his ass out of the lake. Dragging him out the shit a second time cemented a pattern. I have hauled him out of rivers and ponds on many occasion since that day such was his love to chase ducks. Especially the Thames.
his rabies titer had cleared he spent a week in quarantine and he became a Londoner.

He was an Angel. And he was my best friend. We went through so much together.
Charlotte worked tirelessly with him to get him through a rough case of separation anxiety. He loved her like his Mum. And when she was pregnant he gaurded her fiercely.

He has been on many sets. Met many crews. Photo shoots premieres made many many friends he was #73 most influential animal in TIME magazine. He beat JAWS. Something we all thought was brilliant. He’s been in peaky blinders. Legend everyone who met him loved him. He didn’t have a bad bone in his body. All he knew was love.

I don’t normally speak out about family and friends but this is an unusual circumstance. Woody affected so many people in his own right so with great respect to his autonomy and as a familiar friendly face to many of you, it is with great great sadness a heavy heart that I inform you that after a very hard and short 6 month battle with an aggressive polymyostisis Woody passed away, two days ago. He was only Age 6. He was Far too young to leave us and We at home are devastated by his loss I am ultimately grateful for his loyal companionship and love and it is of some great comfort that he is no longer suffering. Above all I am completely gutted. the world for me was a better place with him in it and by my side.
To the bestest friend ever. To me and to a family who loved him beyond words and whom he loved without doubt more than I have ever known. Woody was the bestest of journey companions we ever could dream of having. Our souls intertwined forever.

A friend told me

He was special bro, a shining example of man’s best friend. He burnt very very bright and, those that burn very bright sometimes burn half as long.

Thankyou Woody for choosing to find us. We will love you and be with you and you with us forever. Never ever ever forgotten. Your Boy tom xxx I love you beyond words. To the moon and back again and again to
Infinity and beyond. Run with Max now and the Angels. I will see you when I get there.
With all of me I love you. Always Thankyou for
Your love beautiful boy.

look at me - i will never pass for a perfect bride

so i know i already made a retold mulan post but i just LOVE MULAN SO MUCH so here’s another

in the original myth mulan isn’t really a clumsy fish out of water. she’s strong and smart and the reason she goes to war is because she’s the most qualified person in her family to fight, regardless of gender.

so how about this: mulan’s a fighter. she knows exactly who she is, like in the original myth, she’s knows how to be the blossoming flower and the great stone dragon. she’s still mulan though, so she still doesn’t memorize the silly ways she’s supposed to be a good wife and has little patience for appearing graceful while pouring tea. she’s innovative and courageous and beautiful, but no one is under any illusions about what kind of wife she’ll be.

and the matchmaker is the matchmaker for the li family as well, for this great big part of china. and general li wants his son to be married before he goes off to war, wants his son to have a reason to fight to live, like a wife waiting for him. and the matchmaker reads the stars and the tea leaves and the astrology charts, and no matter what all the signs point to one thing: the honorable li shang is destined to marry the insolent, arrogant fa mulan.

the matchmaker isn’t going to let that happen, she refuses to be responsible for that disaster of a wedding. so she sends her most beautiful girls, the ones that are obedient and quiet and know their roles, the ones that are eager to marry into the li family.

and each of them are entertained and met and sent back. shang is many things, but smooth isn’t one of them, he has nothing to say to these quiet girls who smile at him, feels large and awkward around their polite smiles. so he and his father go to the matchmaker’s village, shang reluctantly and his father to demand she stops messing with them and provides a proper bride.

it’s on the day that mulan and the other girls are parading in the street. shang sees a girl - mulan - hurry into the end of the line, jumping over a bench and darting around a careening wagon to get there, and stifles a laugh.

then there’s no reason to laugh at all, because a group of huns have decided that this village is in their way, and attack.

everyone scatters, women hide, children hide, and most of the men do too. shang and his father join the fight with some of the other men who hadn’t hid, and these men are starved, clearly not with shan yu, so even though they’re outnumbered they’ll likely win.

shang sees a hun go to attack the girl he’d seen earlier, the girl for whatever reason hadn’t run and hid. the hun raises a sword above his head to strike her down, and shang is so sure he’s about to see this pretty girl lose her head.

but she doesn’t. instead she rolls out of the way, and pops up, headbutting him in the stomach. she takes his sword from his now-slack grip and plunges it into his chest. without hesitation or pause the girl joins the fight, swinging the sword expertly and cutting down every man who stands against her. soon they’re fighting back to back, and shang has never felt more in sync with another person. she cuts off the head of the last hun, and shang has never seen anyone more beautiful than this girl, dress ripped and make up smudged and covered in blood that isn’t hers.

“mulan,” one of the other girls says, peaking out of a store front, “is it over?”

the girl, mulan, looks out over the dozen dead men and says, grimly, “it’s barely begun.” she searches the crowd, finding and old man and yelling, “gather the bodies, we’ll burn that at dusk outside of the village. everyone else,” her eyes sweep across the gathered people, and shang is struck by the fact that this girl isn’t well liked. there’s anger and disapproval in many of the faces, but they’re listening. these people don’t like her. but they do trust her. “let’s clean this all up. these were bandits, not soldiers. there’s nothing more to fear.”

“what if there are more?” the other girl asks, arms wrapped around herself.

mulan raises her stolen sword and says, “then i will slice them to ribbons. this is our village, and this is our country. any who would try to take it from us - from me - will suffer the consequences.”

and it shouldn’t be comforting, hearing words of violence from this young girl, yet everyone around them relaxes, and gets moving, gather the bodies and tending the wounded.

“who are you?” his father asks, and someone who doesn’t know him might think he was angry, but shang can tell he’s impressed.

mulan turns to them and bows, “my apologies. i am fa mulan, daughter of fa zhou. thank you for helping us.” she stands, and shang meets her eyes for the first time.

he swallows, and blurts out, “you - you fight good.”

his father coughs to hide his laughter, but mulan’s eyes crinkle at the corners. “thank you. you do as well.”

and they just keep standing there smiling at each other until his father claps his hands and is like okay - they’ll have to report this to the emperor, no time to dawdle, have to go now.

so they take their leave, and shang thinks this is the last time he’ll see fa mulan.

except there’s still the draft, and this time mulan doesn’t take no for an answer, won’t hear of it. her father is injured and old and she is young and fit to fight. she will go in his place.

so she arrives at the camp, prepared to pretend and lie - except she goes to meet her commanding officer and it’s him, that boy who had fought with her. shang’s eyes widen, but they’re in front of too many people. he can see it on her face, her fear, and she hadn’t shown any fear when she was facing down over a dozen huns, but she does now. so he makes his choice and says nothing, pretends he buys her story.

she tracks him down that night and demands an explanation. he says this war is too important to kill good warriors, whatever gender they are. he swears to keep her secret. mulan is his best soldier from the beginning, and means to treat her like anyone else, but it’s impossible. she isn’t like anyone else, is strong and smarter and braver than them. they argue tactics, and she’s the only one who can give him a workout in hand to hand, and he doesn’t have trouble finding his words with her. he finds himself falling in love with her, but doesn’t say anything. she’s not here for love, she’s here for a war. he vows to say something if they survive this, but it’s unlikely that will happen.

they head to the front earlier. they get there in time to provide back up for his father and his army, and it’s a loss but not a slaughter. his father is too distracted to notice ping is the girl from the village. all he knows is this soldier had led the second wave of attacks, and it was thanks to her any of them were alive at all. they prevent half of the huns from getting through the pass, but that’s still an army heading for the imperial city. the general is injured, so mulan and shang lead the army after him.

they find him at the mountain, and just like before mulan uses the cannon to destroy the army. she knew it would spell their death, but it was worth it, for her people, for her country, for her family. this time it’s shang that won’t accept her death, that tries to drag her unconscious body to safety. only he fails, and mulan becomes buried under the snow.

they return to the city, and shang is besides himself - the woman he loves is dead, she saved them all and she’s gone, and he’ll never recover from this. only he can’t tell his father this, their friends. they think he mourns a friend, not the woman he wanted to make his wife.

except mulan survives, and sees the other huns as well. only she kills them there before they can get to the city, and decides this is for the best. fa ping dies honorably in battle, and fa mulan is free to return home to her family.

so general li decides that it’s time to go to that matchmaker again, and demand she stop playing games. the matchmaker confesses that she thought the bride was unsuitable, and the general demands she send her anyway.

so mulan has barely had the chance to settle back home when the matchmaker shows up at her door saying she’s sending her to see a potential husband, but not who. so mulan shows up all made up to li household and shang drags himself into the room, already resigned to a loveless marriage, when they see each other. “mulan?” he demands, and his father is all pleased because it’s the fighting girl from the village.

but then his son starts crying and they run to each other. shang picks her up in his arms and she clings to him, and shang is babbling about how he thought she was dead, and mulan is so overjoyed that she’s with shang, and shang wants her, that she kisses him without explaining.

except now shang’s father demands an explanation. so they give it to him, the whole story comes tumbling out, and he stares hard at her, and remembers her as ping, the brave soldier that had saved them all. he’s not upset - he ecstatic. he goes to the emperor and tells him everything, and the emperor officially offers mulan an officer position in the army. she accepts, as long as shang is by her side. shang seconds this, and they set in motion the plans for the wedding.

fa mulan and li shang get married and lead armies and live happily ever after, just like the stars intended.


read more of my retold fairytales here

school starts for me in a little over a week so i thought i’d make a quick back to school masterpost! this is a compilation of tips that i found helpful from youtube study channels, as well as things that i’ve personally done to make school easier. 

  • do your best work as soon as school starts
    • usually the first week(s) of school have a relatively light homework load, but don’t slack off!
    • this is the time to put in the most effort
    • you’ll be able to see which subjects you want to spend more or less time on throughout the semester
    • also, if you turn in great work, participate in class, and go to office hours right from the start, you’re going to keep up those good habits as the school year continues
    • plus, you’ll leave a fantastic impression on your teachers :)
  • use! a! planner!
    • cliché? yes, but it works
    • planners are a great tool to organize so many different aspects of your life, not just school
    • write down your assignments as soon as you get them so that you won’t forget anything, and so that you can plan your day/week accordingly
    • try to space out your assignments if you can so that you don’t spend all of your time on just one subject
    • describe your tasks. instead of saying “study chemistry” (which will turn into binge-watching youtube), say “practice balancing chemical equations”
    • planners are also great for setting and keeping track of goals! 
    • BUT, if planners don’t work for you, use some other way to keep track of your tasks and your time - to do lists, schedules, checklists, bullet journals, etc. choose what works for you!
    • just make sure that you keep all of your tasks in one place. 
  • break down larger tasks, such as projects or papers, throughout the week
    • do a little every day instead of cramming all the work into one night
    • bonus: try to get your assignments reviewed by someone like a teacher or a classmate before turning them in - most teachers are happy to look at drafts and give suggestions that will improve your work and your grade!
    • also, for big projects, my procrastinating brain has found it helpful to ‘reset the deadlines’ - work so that you’ll finish your bigger assignments a few days before they’re actually due
  • a big part of breaking down tasks and planning is also knowing your own study habits
    • try to figure out how long you spend on certain types of assignments, and know how much time you should allocate to specific tasks
  • when you have a choice, go for meaningful
    • for some assignments, such as essays where you can choose your own prompt, it’s easy to choose the easy prompt
    • but whenever you can, try to go for the prompt that will help you to deepen your understanding of the material you’ve learned
    • teachers who reuse prompts will probably see a lot of the “same” essays every year, so this is a way to stand out in a positive way!
  • if you can, declutter
    • or at least try to clean up your study space for the school year
    • having a neat space to work can really go a long way
    • throw out those old pens that have run out of ink and are honestly just there to look pretty
    • also: invest in good lighting because you gotta take care of those beautiful eyes
  • find classmates who can be your study buddies
    • if you know who the “top students” in your class are, seek out their help! get contact info!
    • if you miss classes or have concepts that you’re having trouble with, you’ll always have someone to ask
    • i mean you should always feel comfortable with asking your teacher for help, but it’s nice to have someone to quickly proofread your paper or review for a test with
    • peer tutors are also a great resource!
  • take the time to establish new habits
    • maybe come up with a morning/afternoon/night routine so that you know you’ll spend some time every day being productive
    • and don’t let yourself off the hook here!!
    • some ideas for habits: hydrating properly every day, working out, getting enough sleep every night, avoiding procrastination, journaling, focusing on one thing at a time / not multitasking, going to office hours consistently, participating in class
    • be honest with yourself. what are some things you do every day that you might not need to do every day? and what are some things you hope you can add to your daily routine?
  • speaking of habits, fix that sleep schedule asap
    • if you want to pay attention in class and turn in good work, you’re going to need enough sleep
    • i would recommend sleeping early and waking up early over sleeping late - it just feels less awful throughout the day and it shouldn’t do as much damage to your sleep schedule as one all nighter will
  • get yo priorities straight
    • learn to say “no” to things that will take up your time but won’t really benefit you
    • recognize that not everything is important
  • that being said! take breaks!!
    • burnout is real my friends
    • a lot of people say that you should use your downtime to work, and you definitely can if you want to and feel able to
    • it’s so easy to feel like you have to be studying or working 24/7, and that’s not true
    • if you feel like you really need a break, take a break
    • spend time with your family and friends! treat yourself with some ice cream! go for a walk (without your phone)! call someone who lives far away from you to say you miss them!
    • being productive is great, and even if you’re the kind of person that can handle that much work without burning out, that stress will release itself elsewhere - some harsh words you didn’t mean, some small thing that annoyed you more than it should have

ok that was a lot crammed into one post, but i have one more important point: be excited for school!!! it may be stressful at times (most of the time) but school is a place where we learn things and better ourselves and open our minds to new perspectives! i am personally so psyched for 10th grade and i think having that attitude will make back to school a lot easier :)

i hope some of these tips help you, and as usual feel free to drop me an ask about anything! i’ll be writing more of these “quick tip”-type masterposts for back to school because they’re a looot less time consuming for me to make (being honest here). let me know what you think of this format! and if you have any requests for masterpost topics i’m always open to those. 

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Spinning, Ramadan and…

MUTASIM: Okay. What the fuck happened now?

[HEY BRISKEBY]

ELIAS: What’s up everyone! Welcome back, I hope you’re well. Like I always say, you look good no matter what. Today, like you can tell, we’re in a totally different place. We’re outside, for the first time in history.

ADAM: Yousef!

YOUSEF: Yes?

ADAM: Why are were here today and not at home?

MIKAEL: Why?

MUTASIM: It’s because one of the people here, doesn’t dare to go to another person’s place because..

ADAM: Explain!

MUTASIM: Something happened at someone’s else’s place with someone.

YOUSEF: Mutta is explaining. I thought we have to get tan and stuff because we’re..

MUTASIM: Because we’re sitting in the shade.

YOUSEF: Get some pigment.

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Mutually Assured Dating

‘You were singing really loudly in the shower when I broke into your apartment but then i heard you slip and crash and oh god i should probably check on you in case i get done for murder instead of just robbery’ AU


It took all of fourteen seconds for Derek to realize he was in the wrong apartment.

First, he noticed the very large and scuffed up sneakers and boots ditched haphazardly kind of near the door but half into the living room. Cora was meticulous about her shoes and kept them neatly arranged in a shoe rack right next to the door. The only time they touched the floor was when her feet were in them.

Second, the stuff. There was so much stuff everywhere; clothes thrown over the back of the couch, dishes across the coffee table and all over the kitchen counters, books on every surface, a gaming console dragging wires across the floor and surrounded by games, in cases and out of them. Cora was an unintentional minimalist, in that she threw out anything she didn’t need and lacked a single sentimental bone in her body. Derek and Laura regularly made trips to wherever she lived to save family keepsakes and memories from her ruthless cleaning sprees.

Then he noticed the manly warble coming from somewhere deeper in the apartment, and Cora’s favorite topic of rant floated lazily to the forefront of his mind.

—but my neighbor, oh my god this guy! I’m going to kill him if I ever see him in the hall! His bathroom shares a wall with my bedroom and he sings in the shower, every shower, at all hours. Literally all hours, like 4am, and he only sings Christmas carols at 4am. I’ve had Jingle Bells stuck in my head for a week! 

Shoes, stuff, singing.

This was not Cora’s apartment.

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Bojack Horseman and Rick and Morty: The Hardest Nihilistic Show to watch and the easiest Nihilistic Show to watch

Bojack Horseman is such a weird show for me.

It’s like I need to set a time weeks, or years in advance to sit down and watch it. I’ve only watched the show once but it is so philosophical and life changing and depressing and deep, it’s like I have to set out emotional time out of my day to pick a moment to watch it.

I’ve only watched it once and once was enough to change my entire outlook on life and look at my life from a new angle. 

Where as Rick and Morty is a Nihilistic show too, there are way more laugh out loud moments and tends to make fun of Nihilism. The characters can be deep, while being shallow at the same time. They can be very aware they are in a show. Saying things like: “Was he doing a bit?” things I don’t hear in modern english unless I’m hanging with the theater kids.

A thing that Rick and Morty achieves perfectly with it’s humor is the art of Schadenfreude. Or “Taking pleasure/enjoyment/humor from the suffering of others.” Every single deep moment in Rick and Morty is usually accompanied with a sad or intense song, that you can take in as Horribly deep and depressing, while being hilarious at the exact same time. 

I will take an example from Season One. 

Kind of a spoiler, but this happens very early in season one. It’s like the halfway point of season one, just to establish this show doesn’t fuck around.

The jist of it, is that Rick and Morty ruined the world so badly, that they went to a different universe. A different reality where they died around this time. Accompanied by sad music is Morty coming to grips that everything around him isn’t real and it’s an entirely new reality. Leaving behind a damaged and broken world. And he has to bury his own corpse. So every event in the previous episodes are reconnected or might of not happened in this reality. 

What makes this a very emotional intense scene and an extremely funny one is how juxtaposed Morty is to this compared to everyone else around him. Morty is having an existential crisis about everyone he left behind, meanwhile Reality doesn’t care. Rick grabs a drink, Summer Texts on her phone, his mom and dad argue on the cusp of divorce. Nothing changed. Life goes on. 

I remember the first time I saw this scene when it aired on TV, it blew my mind, while also making me laugh at the same time.

That’s because the show makes it clear Reality doesn’t care about Morty’s extensional crisis. You can take pleasure in his suffering while making it tragic and realistic but funny at the same time. 

And a majority of every emotional scene in Rick and Morty is like this.

There is a moment in season 2 where one character attempts suicide, and while it’s framed in a serious manner, it is also hilarious. It’s not that the show makes fun of suicidal people. (like a tasteless joke in some other adult shows) The inner turmoil is shown and portrayed very seriously. What makes the scene funny, is while the character lies still and alone all night after his failed suicide attempt, the Pathetic Father character Jerry, comes into the foreground, with his weed wacker. A trivial thing he was complaining about the whole episode. Without noticing the character’s pain. “Life goes on. Nobody cares.” Which is seriously sad and funny at the same time.

As I said  Schadenfreude. “Nobody cares. Might as well laugh about it” 

Bojack Horseman has it’s share of funny moments too, it’s writing style in similar format to the Simpsons and typical satire. 

But the comedic moments are usually far away from it’s serious moments.

They have their moments of  Schadenfreude as well. Such as small #relatable moments that make me laughing my ass off due to the delivery. Cause I’m sure many can relate to procrastinating and being lazy as hell on a project or having friends kick your pathetic ass to actually do something.

But when the show wants to get deep, the humor stays far away from the realism. 

There are also suicide attempts in this show as well. And while Rick and Morty can take a look in the mirror and laugh at itself. Like “Nobody cares, might as well laugh about it” This show seems to say: “Life is horrible, we are horrible people, if we don’t take power within ourselves to change. nobody cares. Deal with it.”

Which it a heartbreaking but raw realistic message.

Which is why I only watched the show once and am postpoing watching the newest season as long as I can.

The show is raw, it doesn’t hold back and every deep emotional moment has no comic relief moment to recover.

It lets you breathe in the heavy atmosphere and deal with every screw up the main character commits. 

It’s like if an adult cartoon character had real world negative consequences for his horrible behavior. Friends abandon him, forgiveness is optional, and people die because of a direct result of the main character.

A lot of the problems with myself and with my generation as a whole is that we tend to dissolve blame for things that we are directly at fault for. I know we tend to point fingers at the Baby Boomer generation or society a lot, but pointing fingers doesn’t really help things get better. If you just want to whine and not inspire change. You have to look deep inside yourself and find the will to change.

Something that both shows preach.

“The thing about repairing, maintaining and cleaning is, it’s not an adventure. There’s no way to do it so wrong you might die. It’s just…. work. And the truth of the matter is that, some of us are okay with going to work, and well, some of us rather die. Each of us gets to choose.” 

I love Bojack Horseman and I love Rick and Morty. But one is way more easier to watch then the other. I know a lot of people on tumblr are comparing both shows, but to me, they are equal in greatness, just take a very different approach to the same subject mater. 

I will get to watching Season 4 of Bojack Horseman some day. But not where I’m at right now. 

I am glad I read a few therapy books before watching bojack horseman and rick and morty so I wasn’t too mindblown by the messages portrayed.

You Look Like You Need a Drink (M)

Originally posted by hidden--demons

Summary: After a bad week with the worst luck imaginable, you happen upon a local dive bar run by an attractive young bartender who livens up your evening.

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Smut

Word Count: 7,221

Warning: Bartender!Yoongi, tattooed!Yoongi, sexual harassment, sexual themes, power play, manners kink, alcohol use, profanity

A/N: I wrote this last year for my dear friend’s birthday and swore this fic would never see the light of day. I have since “remastered” it, so to speak, so I’m sharing it here. SURPRISE!

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The Boys Dormitory
  • In first year, the first time the five boys ever walked into their new home for the next seven years, could have been mayhem. But they had all eaten muchhhh too much food and so the fighting and mucking around was, thankfully kept to a minimum.
  • Sirius immediately dived onto the bed furthest from the door, not even bothering to unpack or undress before falling into a wriggly sleep. James bagged the bed next to him, mostly because it was also next to the window with the best view of the Quidditch pitch. Peter managed to sneak the bed next to James. Remus just lay down and quietly closed the curtains on another bed, far away from any window views that may show a certain grey orb. 
  • The next morning, however, everyone in the room was woken at 5 in the morning by James jumping up and down on his bed and running around the dorm in a nervous/ over-excited state.
  • Sirius tries to keep his bed as messy as possible, it was a strange way he used to piss his mother off at home, but his aristocratic nature glitters through sometimes and some of the boys can catch him plumping his pillows or straightening the sheets occasionally. He also leaves his pyjamas under his pillow each morning but mention it and you’ll get hexed. He is usually pretty good at cleaning up after himself and he always has his clothes in the right places, oh, except for his underwear, for some reason that just ends up everywhere?? under the bed, on the floor, in the shower, in James’ bed??? But other than that and the fact that he keeps trying to do homework in his bed and spills ink everywhere every time, he’s pretty good.
  • You would be proud of James if you saw his area, all nice and clean, nothing lying around… and then you would look a little closer. Every. single. item. he owns is jammed either under the bed, in his trunk, in the bedside table. I mean stuffed, it’s dirty and disgusting and packed full the brim and there is a funny smell coming from one part??? But somehow he just knows where everything is. Quidditch robes? Sticks his hand into the pile at the top of the bed and out they come. Borrow a quill? Sticks his hand into a jar rolled under a mound of unfolded clothes and out comes three. He does it in that way mums do with their purses, because you know.. he’s mum friend™. You don’t need to hide anything when it’s such a jumble only you can understand it.
  • Peter tried to copy James with his piles of shit, but it really stressed him out so he had to go and fold everything after like half an hour. He is the only cleaner in the room, going around picking dirty towels and clothes up off the floor for people. All his stuff organised and well kept and very aesthetically pleasing for some reason? He also always seems to have food somewhere, usually bedside table draw that he will pull out whenever it is needed, which is a lot.
  • Overall our boys do pretty well, nothing too unhygienic, pretty clean considering they are teenage boys.. oh wait I forgot Remus.
  • Remus is a fucking disaster. Like actually helpless/useless. His crap is e.v.e.r.y.w.h.e.r.e… except his bed. Ties on top of beds, shirts all over the floor every time, trousers hanging on the shower, hairbrush where his toothbrush should be, jumper on the outside of the window??? I mean he just can’t even get it together enough to find his own set of clothes because god knows where he threw his shit last night so mostly he just wears James’ school uniform until he is too embarrassingly tall for it and then every morning James has to dive into the shit and pull out Remus’ stuff from under the carpet or tangled in the drapes while Remus lies face down on the pillow and refuses to get up. He keeps his bag nicely packed but that is it. Also used to keep a massive stash of chocolate under his bed but he forgot it was there one day and it all melted and was fucking gross so now Peter looks after it for him.
  • Shower routine is James at like 4am because dis boy does not sleep and goes running when you shouldn’t. Peter is usually next, he gets up in time to have a nice shower. Remus usually doesn’t bother in the morning because he can barely make it to breakfast. Sirius takes a year in the shower every morning but may start crying if you leave without him so you just have to pound on the door and hope he can hear you over his singing. it’s dreadful btw.
  • The boys usually convene on James’ bed but once they are too big to lay on top of each other on it, they make a cute little circle in the middle to sit up and plan pranks/eat snacks with one of Remus’ mini, not flammable fires in the centre of them.
  • James once tried to fly his broom in the dorm on a dare and broke Peter’s bed.
  • Remus once fell asleep on the steps in front of the dorm because.. he is Remus and it was almost a full moon, so the boys just draped him in blankets and left him there.
  • There about fifty stains in places you can’t even imagine all over the room and they were all Sirius.
  • Peter sticks sticky notes and pictures and sheets of parchment all over the walls all the time.
  • There are numerous scorch marks in the ceiling. Enough said.
  • From fourth year they have an ‘if the curtains are drawn don’t open them’ rule because James tried to get into Sirius’ bed to chat about three times without noticing that Sirius was in bed with Remus and was deeply offended that they were scheming without him until he realised they weren’t doing much talking…..
  • there were also many other instances of each of them walking in on each other in very private situations with other people because all four boys were much too comfortable with each other.
  • they then had to instigate a no walking around the dorm naked rule because Sirius kept doing it when there were girls in there.
  • They all carved their initials into their bedposts in 6th year and then went back and added ‘i solemnly swear that I am up to no good.’ on James headboard and ‘mischief managed.’ on Sirius’ in 7th year. it was that lucky guess that let fred and george guess the marauder’s map passwords
  • the window sill is semi-permanently covered in cigarette and joint butts.
  • Sirius left about a thousand lipstick stains on the mirror.
  • Lily kept leaving her shampoo in the shower in the seventh year and Peter liked it so much he wouldn’t give it back.
  • They all share one spray on deodorant for some reason?
  • They had a routine of not going to sleep until every one of them was back. They also said ‘goodnight’ to each other every night with out fail, no matter how bad the argument or problem.
  • They were basically so comfortable, so in-sync with each other that you would have walked into the Gryffindor boys room and thought it was a family.
  • And in a way.. it was.


Click here for my post about the Girls Dormitory!

A Moment (Richie/Eddie)

Summary: In which Richie and Eddie are both flustered by a moment that was rudely interrupted.

Prompt 86: “Have you seen- oh

Prompt 42: “I’d like to talk to you when you have your pants on, okay?”

A/N: Thankyou to who requested this!! This is so hard not to make sexual as the request specifically asked for them to be in the middle of a ‘moment’ like a make out and they’re walked in on. Please don’t think I’m trying to sexualise the kiddos in any way shape or form because that is not my intention. ALSO, they’re 15 in this fic!! I’m this age and people at my age are doing MUCH worse than making out so please keep your argument about me sexualising them to yourselves bC TEENAGERS MAKE OUT, TEENAGERS DO A LOT OF BA D THINGS

“Eds, hey- Eds.”

Eddie grumbled, pulling the sheets over his head to block out the voice of Richie Tozier.

“Eds, c’mon. Get up.”

“Fuck off Richie. Don’t call me that.” Eddie hissed, staying under the sheets and attempting to fall back into a peaceful slumber.

Richie frowned, his head tilted with his glasses falling down his nose. He lifted a single finger up and pushed them up, leaving yet again another fingerprint against his dirtied lenses. His imprint smudges the sight in once light, but Richie barely notices.

“No one is fucking here, I think Bill and Stan left.” Richie pestered on, grabbing Eddie’s shoulder and shaking it heavily.

Eddie frowned, eyes slowly sliding open and a groan of frustration leaves Eddie’s lips and he sits up, glaring daggers at Richie with fresh tears of waking up abruptly on his waterline.

“Richie, you fucking asshole. That is what you wake me up for?”

“Well, I woke up alone and I didn’t want to be alone. Why is that a problem?”

“I barely sleep as it is, Richie! You just fucking broke me from an actual good sleep!” Eddie cried, anger pulsing through his veins before he quickly calms down, grabbing his hair strands as he places his head in his hands.

Richie couldn’t help but feel guilt for his own selfish actions, sighing quietly and awkwardly patting at his bare thigh as he only wore underwear and a random band tee, as always, to sleep.

“Eds, I’m sorry.” Richie sat down, climbing onto the mattress next to Eddie.

Eddie was silent for a moment before speaking up, “It’s fine. I didn’t mean to totally freak out.” Eddie too let the nickname slide, as he played with the edged trim of the blanket that covered his own bare legs. 

Silence pierced the thin air of Bill’s room, as the two sat in silence next to each other with their elbows grazing one another. Richie sucked in his bottom lip, and shuddered as he wasn’t covered by Eddie’s bedding and was exposed to the late September air.

“Why don’t you sleep good, Eds?” Richie questioned, with his head tilted and looking towards Eddie.

Eddie nibbled at the skin that peeled from his lower lip, rubbing his hands together and he shrugged.

“I..I guess it’s just nightmares? They’re weird. Like, fuck.” Lies. Total fucking lies.

“What are they like?” Richie watched the way his hands moved and jittered, which was a sign he was lying as well as the lip biting.

“Well,” Eddie started, before trying to find his words as if thinking through everything he was about to say and how he would say it, “Um, just stuff like me getting sick. Shit like that.”

Richie thought about how long he had to think about his supposed ‘nightmares’ and his response to his question. Richie nodded, not pressuring the boy any further.

Eddie gulped as he thought of the real reason, one of his slight fears that often triggered his anxiety late at night. His sexuality. See, Eddie was still curious and testing the waters with himself; not knowing if he was into girls or into guys or both. That wasn’t the problem though, his problem was his Mother. His mother would possibly think that Eddie would be screwed up mentally and have many mental illnesses if he told his Mother that he liked guys in any way shape or form. He’d never get a break and he’d never be allowed to have sleepovers like this or even be allowed to talk another male ever again.

Eddie cringed as the thoughts came back to him, quickly trying to shake them away by focusing upon Richie. 

“So, how was your night? Sleeping, I mean.”

“Oh, I sleep like a fucking rock.” Richie chuckles, his shoulders moving as he chuckles. 

“How is sleeping like a rock a good thing?” Eddie tilts his head, looking to Richie, “Rocks are hard, it must be hard to sleep.”

Richie smirks, “Maybe that’s because I am hard most of the time.”

Eddie is confused for a moment before realisation hits him forcefully and he groans with a blush spreading over his cheeks, “Fuck off, Richie. You know what I meant.”

“Especially morning wood, oh boy, let me tell you-”

Eddie clamps a hand over Richie’s mouth before he gets more flustered than he already is. Eddie’s eyes are wide, staring into Richie’s without blinking. Richie can’t help but notice how the two boys were as close as ever, with Eddie obviously blushing like a tomato. Richie felt his smirk grow even more under Eddie’s palm and he wiggled his eyebrows at the crimson boy.

Eddie felt the movements under his palm, staring into Richie’s large eyes due to his spectacles, before sighing in annoyance.

“Seriously, Richie? Your lenses are jacked up.” Eddie removes his hand before taking Richie’s glasses off slowly and carefully.

Richie was too slow to protest, feeling his own face heat up as his whole face was no longer hidden by his coke bottle glasses which covered a lot of his insecurities up.  Richie felt exposed in a weird way, not being able to see Eddie properly but Eddie being able to see every pore and flaw that laid upon Richie’s face. 

Eddie breathed hot air onto both lenses, using his own shirt to wipe away each of the finger prints and splashes from substances that had stained the lenses.

Richie watched with blind eyes, barely being able to tell what he was doing for him. His eyes were squinted and his head tilted forward and staring directly at the hazed actions.

Finally, Eddie was done and he lifted them up delicately, placing them back on Richie’s face with a small and soft grin. 

“Be more clean, asshole. Isn’t that much better?” Eddie folded his arms over smugly.

Richie blinked and pushed them up higher on his nose, this time with the small space between the lenses and not smudging them like he usually does. He could see much clear, being able to see the soft sun rays peak through the curtains and shining on Eddie’s baby face. He admired everything in that moment, how one eye of his was squinting due to the orange-y hue that blinded one of his eyes from seeing Richie properly and the other remaining soft and bambi like. How Eddie’s right corner of his lips was arched higher than the other and how his usually neatened chocolate strands were in fact out of place and going in every direction.

Richie couldn’t help himself, he really couldn’t. The moment before him couldn’t be more flawless.

Really? You’re gonna do this now? Now-

Richie’s thoughts were cut off by his actions as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Eddie’s.

Eddie’s smug look was wiped away in a split second, his eyes widening as he stared at Richie’s closed pair of eyes with shock and in awe. Eddie had both of his hands raised at the side of Richie’s face in shock which soon, he melted. He melted perfectly against Richie and his hands fell onto his cheeks, feeling Richie’s heated skin beneath his clammy palms. 

Richie felt his hands snake around Eddie’s waist, pulling him onto his lap for a better position in the kiss. Richie, being much more confident than Eddie in the whole ‘first kiss’ scenario as Eddie was of course, oblivious on how to kiss.

The two newly found 15 year old boys, had their arms all over each other with their lips smearing against the other pair that battled for dominance in the kiss. Richie ran his tongue across Eddie’s bottom lip for a silent ask for permission, knowing his boundaries due to Eddie’s phobia of anything to do with germs or sickness’. Eddie hesitated, before opening his lips to allow Richie swirl his tongue inside in perfect sync with Eddie’s. Richie was soft, comfortable and caring for Eddie, making sure to not cross any lines that would make Eddie be disgusted or revolted in any way.

Eddie then pushes Richie forward. At first, this caused Richie to think that he did somehow cross the line but instead- he was pushed on his back and Eddie was sitting on his lower stomach.

Richie stared up at Eddie with soft eyes as well as a smirk. “I always thought you’d be a bottom, Eds.” 

Eddie’s chest burned bright as his blush had spread all over. “Shut up, asshole. I don’t like it when you call me that.”

But oh, how they both knew that what Eddie had said was a lie.

Eddie then leaned down, his lips colliding with Richie’s again, tasting the same blackberry bubblegum that lingered on Richie’s set of lips from the previous night whilst his own tasted of mint. His legs begun shaking lightly from the intense makeout session that was happening currently, only for Richie to place his hand on the back of Eddie’s thigh to soothe him.

Hey have you seen- oh.”

Eddie flung himself away from Richie and Richie fell off the mattress head first with a grunt of pain leaving past his pink and swollen lips. Eddie pressed his back against the wall, tidying his messy hair and trying to cover his own flustered blush that had been permanently tattooed onto his cheeks.

Both saw Stan, stood there, with a water gun in his hands and his own face heating up in embarrassment from walking in on a situation which could’ve went anywhere if he had not walked in. Stan gulped audibly and looked elsewhere.

I’d like to talk to you when you have your pants on, okay?

The two boys looked at each other in horror and realised how the situation must look to someone like Stan who just walked in on the two boys pantless and in their underwear with Eddie sitting on top of Richie in a heated makeout.

“No Stan it’s not-”

Stan had already walked off, without letting Richie finish his sentence.

Eddie quickly reached for his inhaler which was kept under his pillow, taking a few quick puffs from anxiety racing under his skin. Richie looked over worryingly before sighing.

“Look, don’t worry. Lets just get dressed and go talk to him, kay’?”

Despite Richie’s comforting words, Eddie couldn’t help but feel his fear of his sexuality raise higher and higher. He pushed it back as both him and Richie dressed themselves in their usual attire for the day.

Both boys, once done changing, looked at eachother with soft eyes and Richie then offered his hand out to Eddie and tilting his head as if he was mentally asking, ‘Are you okay?’

Eddie nodded, reaching his own out and grabbing Richie’s for comfort. Richie then walked forward and guided his soon to be boyfriend out of Bill’s empty bedroom.

|4 september 2017|

it’s finally back to school time for most of us and, at least for me, it’s also time to start good habits, crack down on the bad ones, and just begin to prepare for the year ahead. i’ve been in school for a couple of weeks now and, so far, i’m doing pretty good. below, i’ve compiled some simple tips that help me in day to day life that i would love to share. so let’s get cracking:

  1. prepare outfits and pack your backpack on sunday instead of in the morning. i know for a fact you have more time on sunday to prepare your outfits and pack your backpack than on monday morning so planning in advance will most definitely benefit you. instead of running around in circles trying to find that shirt, hang them up in the front of your closet or place them in the top of a drawer on sunday. and instead of throwing random pens in a bag, pack your backpack and put it in front of your door. it’ll save you time to do other things such as eating and washing your face.
  2. prepare and eat a breakfast. whether it’s some cherrios in a bag on the way to class or eggs and bacon cooked that morning, eating will definitely benefit you. you’ll have more focus in class and it’ll get your metabolism going. if it’s easier for you, think about preparing your food the night before and packing it in bags or tupperware.
  3. have a tray by the door to put small things in. oh, how many times have i forgotten my earbuds or keys. keep yourself organized and not calling your roommate to get an extra set of keys by just having a tray on which you can put smaller things you don’t put in your backpack. then, just grab them before you leave and voilà! you aren’t locked out.
  4. on sunday, do your meal preps, weekly spread, and clean your room and workspace. i am such a procrastinator during the weekends and there have been so many days that because of that, i am trudging through knee high messes in my room because i just won’t pick up. i also commonly forget to plan the week and prep my meals and then boom, it’s monday and i’m a mess. so don’t be a mess like me, do it all on sunday.
  5. have a letter tray to put class handouts and old assessments so you can put them in binders later. using a letter tray to collect handouts and assessments can be so beneficial to keeping your desk clean. and without it, i tend to throw out old graded assessments i could study instead of putting them in binders. keeping all those papers in one binder is super helpful, so put them in a binder and finals won’t be your doom.
  6. have a bedtime routine. having a bedtime routine can increase your productivity and sleep time because, one, it can help you stay organized and, two, it helps put you to sleep. the more your brain associates doing certain tasks with sleep, the faster you’ll be able to drift off. so be smart and enjoy an extra hour of sleep.
  7. have one journal for in class notes and one to retake and organize your notes at home. in class you do not have time to keep your thoughts organized. with tangents from your teachers and questionable notes, its best to just use a pencil, pen, and highlighter to make scratch notes in class and then come home and organize it into something that you can study from. this idea has kept me afloat time and time again.
  8. talk to your teachers. do yourself a favor, ask and answer questions in class and go to your teachers’ office hours if they have them. if you do this, your teachers are more likely to recognize you and will be more lenient with your grade (since it shows you’re engaged and involved). you don’t necessarily need to like the teacher, just pretend you care. smile and nod along as you ask about their lives, questions about the content, and for advice that you are never going to take. this is a pretty slytherin thing i’ve been doing for years and it has got me so many half points back, especially in math and science.
  9. use quizzes and tests to study for finals. as i stated earlier, it’s important to save your assessments to study, and that is especially true during finals. teachers commonly use similar questions on the final as unit tests and quizzes. think of how many more points you can score on that final if you just study your tests.
  10. make a study group. find friends and people in your classes that you would like to study with and meet up! they’ll definitely be able to help you understand topics and it’ll be more fun than holing yourself up in your room. also, explaining concepts to others will help you better understand them and answer those questions on your tests.
  11. make a weekly to-do list. some of you may already do this in your weekly spreads, but it’s important to make to-do lists of goals and tasks you need to complete. this isn’t necessarily studying and notes but things such as cleaning your room, watering your plants, or going grocery shopping. make lists, organize yourself, don’t be a mess like me.
  12. reward yourself for doing well. whether it’s talking to your teacher or scoring straight a’s, we all work hard. so why not treat yourself to a nice dinner or relaxing bath? have fun, relax, and don’t let yourself get too stressed. remember to unwind.
  13. sit up front in class. i know, i know, you don’t really want to, but think about it. if you’re up front, you are going to be 100% more engaged and paying more attention. and this will make your teacher remember you, which you now know the benefits of. you will also be able to see the board easier, get your questions answered, and hear what is going on.
  14. talk to the people around you in your classes. jeremy from physics sneezes on you and suddenly, you’ve got the flu and can’t make it to your lit lecture. what are you going to do? text that new friend you made from lit that sits next to in the lecture hall of course. simply talking to people on your first day can help you stay on top of class in case you miss or can help you study before the test. never doubt the benefits of knowing people.
  15. if there’s an opportunity for extra credit, take it. i don’t care how good you are in that class or how perfect your grades are, take the extra credit. those few extra points could be the ones that take you from a b to an a. just do it and don’t question it, you may need them. 
  16. outline all papers and presentations. you have a draft due for your class in a few hours and you open you computer and prepare to type. but where to begin? what are you writing? how do you want to phrase it? well, you could already know that if you had outlined it. take the time to research, write a thesis, and fully understand your prompt before you write. especially if this is a persuasive essay. do this as well for presentations and visual assignments so you say every fact and point you want to.
  17. keep your test dates by you at all times. no matter who you are, you need to know when tests are coming up. and, as someone who tends to leave things at home sometimes, i may not have my planner with those tests dates next to me when i need them. but what do i have? my phone. i use the app My Study Life to keep track of those dates. i explain that beautiful app in this post.
  18. have a ‘school survival kit.’ by now i think you’ve caught on to the fact i can be a bit forgetful. so i like to have a little bag with me that has things i may need that i could have forgotten. this includes a pen, pencil, highlighter, a few pads, some mints, pain medicine, allergy medicine, tissues, band-aids, hand sanitizer, tide-to-go (stain remover), and other such items. i may make a list of these items at another time.
  19. if you have a question, ask. i’ve already gone over the benefits of talking in class but it’s also extremely important to understand your content. it’s better to ask than not know, even if you think the question is dumb. there’s a good chance someone else has that exact question. it’s also better to look stupid than have that count against you during assessments.
  20. if your university, college, or high school has a writing center, use it. i work in a writing center and we are here to help. we do nothing so much of the time and you coming in makes our day. contrary to the popular opinion, we aren’t going to judge your writing or insult you (unless you ask for it). but we also aren’t going to correct your entire paper, we want to help you learn how to edit your papers and make sure you’re fitting the requirements. and this goes for all tutoring centers; if they’re an option, use them. 
Petname Babygirl II pt.1

yoongi x reader

genre: smut, dom!yoongi, sugardaddy!yoongi

word count: 7.3k


Sleeping with some random guy was one thing. But realizing that he is your boss was a disaster until he offers you something tempting you cannot reject.

Originally posted by sugamysavagebaby

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PSA about women walking alone at night

Hey, everyone! I was walking home late last night and I just felt like I needed to say some stuff. Yes, it is inspired by true events.

Dudes, let me give you some advice on how to interact with women walking alone late at night. This advice is intended to help you make them feel comfortable and safe from…yeah, you. And also for you to avoid getting your dick kicked into your chest cavity. My females, I’m putting out some tips that I learned from my daddy (who was a cop) that have helped make me feel safer while walking home. (Obviously subject to editing if people have some reliable source they’d like to share that contradicts what I’ve said. It’s about being safe, after all).

My dudes…

If you see a woman walking alone late at night, don’t walk behind her. If you’re going the same way as her, try crossing to the other side of the street, or making it really clear you are not paying any attention to her. If she looks back at you, politely say that you are keeping your distance and wish her a good night. If she stops to let you walk by her, it’s not an insult. It’s for her safety, because she has been trained not to trust men late at night. She is protecting her six, and if you’re a decent guy, you will let her. Don’t ask a woman you see walking late at night for a cigarette, a dollar, or to use her phone. Don’t say shit to her unless it’s to tell her to have a good night and be safe. If you see a woman being harassed, loudly offer to call the police, or just go ahead and do so. Don’t offer to walk her home, because that’s a familiar line and will put her instantly on the defensive. Instead, ask her if you can call her a taxi or contact a friend. If a woman gives you a dirty look when she’s walking home at 2 AM, please don’t call her a bitch. She’s protecting herself, and if you think she has that right, then just take it with an understanding nod, instead of acting like a fucking baby. If you’re a professional driver, don’t follow beside her slowly, like you’re casing her. If she needs a cab, she will make that obvious. If you’re a bouncer, and she is leaving your protection, give her advice on the safest ways to walk. If a woman asks for your help, and you consent to giving it to her, please be respectful of boundaries and make it clear you are not helping her for any reason other than to make sure she is safe.

Women…

Firstly, I know how fucking obnoxious it is to have to tailor your entire life to the sexual urges of predators. I know you just want to say “Screw this” sometimes and go out for a walk because why should you have to stay cooped up? I also know that sometimes, you can’t help it. Sometimes your ride ditches you and you don’t have cab fare. i am not going to lecture you, because you know what you’re doing.

So maybe instead I can give you some things you maybe haven’t thought of before.

1) Take off your high heels. If that grosses you out and you don’t want to carry spare shoes, carry a pair of socks in your purse (or your bra. Come on, they make great hoists) and wear them over your bare feet. I’ve seen those little rubber shoe things too, that look like flats…those are dope.

2) Avoid dark places. Even if it means you have to walk a little out of the way. You need to be able to see everything around your for at least a hundred feet, because a man can clear 100 feet at a dead run, very quickly.

3) Always look around, constantly. Predators want an easy mark, and if you’re paying attention, you cannot be an easy mark.

4) Pass by as many ATM’s as possible and look directly at them. They have continual activity on their cameras, so if you are snatched, the police can document your movements.

5) Only carry cards. If the place you’re going only takes cash, then have a specific amount and no more than that. The idea is to minimize incentives to rob you. If a man approaches you to rob you, and you have nothing to give him, he will likely leave at once, because he is usually nervous and doesn’t want to be identified, so be prepared to empty that bag out on the road and show him you have no valuables.

6) Should you have a weapon? Only if you know how to use them and are willing to do so, otherwise they end up being taken from you and used on you. Long range weapons like pepper spray are better.

7) Don’t talk on your cellphone in the standard way. I know you think that it’s a good idea, but the fact is, it distracts you and holding it can block your line of sight. A man can grab you and smash it and no one can track you. Instead, put it on speaker, tuck it in a pocket, and give constant location updates, if you feel threatened. Or prearrange a text appointment with someone who can call authorities if you don’t reply.

8) No music. Do not be that girl, walking in the dark, with her phone on a loud song to take her mind off the scariness of it. Music draws attention to you and distracts you. It can also mask noises of a confrontation.

9) If a man walks behind you, you have two options. You can put your back to a wall and allow him to pass by you, or you can cross the street. If he follows, find a public place immediately. If this isn’t possible, the fact is, he’s a threat. If it were me, I’d look him right in the eye and make sure he can see that I’m willing to kill. Don’t ignore a threat, and ladies, walking alone at 2 am means every man is a potential threat. Run, if you feel threatened. Who the fuck cares if he isn’t “actually a bad guy” or thinks it’s weird? Just ask yourself, “What if he is a bad guy?”

10) Be willing to drop everything in your hands. If there’s something you don’t want to leave in the street, shove it in your bra or your pocket.

11) There’s a lot of debate about how to deal with an attacker if it does happen. Some say to do what you’re told, and some say to fight like hell. I can’t make that decision for you, but you have to be aware, and try and understand the attacker. Ask questions. If you think they aren’t listening…it’s up to you. Personally, a guy better not try to put his dick in my mouth, because I will bite it the fuck off and see what happens, but thats me. Don’t go with him. If he has a weapon, then he is willing to kill you. So make the choice. If you go with him, you stand a much higher risk of never coming back, because in solitude, with no threat of discovery, he can do whatever he wants. If he wants you to leave where you are, it means that place is safer, so stay in that place.

12) Do learn self defense. If a man can hit you once, he can win. Learn how not to get hit. Learn how to get out of suppression holds. Learn what to do if grabbed from behind.

13) Minimize physical risk. Take off all jewelry, Ponytails are just convenient handles. (I had a friend get grabbed from behind by her ponytail and lifted off the ground, with a knife to her throat. She couldn’t get free because he had all her hair in one hand. Hair is VERY strong. So take your hair down, because if he can only get a handful, you can usually tear free, but if he has all of it, you can’t go anywhere.) Same with loose clothing or clothes with strings. Keys are weapons, rings are weapons. High heeled shoes can kill a man.

14) The cops will not be angry with you if you call them because you feel threatened, and it turns out nothing is wrong. They just won’t. In fact, I can think of at least ten famous cases where a woman called the cops because she was being followed and it turned out the guy was like some horrible rapist or murderer they finally caught.

15) You have the right to defend yourself. Better to be alive and dealing with assault charges than dead in a gutter.

One time I flipped a jogger upside down because he came up behind me really fast while I was walking home from work at midnight. He laid on his back looking up at me like “WTF DID I DO” and I just said to him, “Hey man, I am really sorry, but you scared the shit outta me.” And helped him up. 

And you know what? He was totally cool about it. Said he completely understood and asked me what martial art that was. I told him it was Aikido and then offered to pay his cleaning or medical later if he needed it. He shook his head and goes, “No, ma’am, we’re good.” and jogged on. 

I’m not telling you that so that you kick every man you see at night in the balls. Men have to walk home at night sometimes, same as us. I’m telling you that because women have been taught they have no right to be fierce. And they absolutely do. It’s better to defend yourself first and ask questions later, to run first and feel silly later, to strip down or button up first and let loose later.

Be safe. Women, be smart. And dudes…don’t take this personally. If you agree that women should be equals, then treat them with respect.

they call her maid maleen

for the first few trembling years of her life, she is a princess. she is the daughter to the king, born of his beloved wife and of her visage. her dark eyes have the appearance of a smoky quarts and her mother carefully twists her mass of black hair into a hundred small braids down her back. she is a beautiful, quiet child, and for a while all is well. they call her princess maleen.

then her mother dies. it seems as if the king is determined to bury his love for his daughter along with his queen. he moves her to a different wing of the castle, and refuses to see her. her tutors are let go, and the nobles’ children are no longer allowed to play with her. only the maids look after her now.

the king remarries. the new queen gives birth to a son, and maleen is forgotten completely, banished from a home she still resides in and a life she can now only watch unfold.

the maids take care of her, braid her hair and kiss the blisters on her fingers, teach her to scrub at porcelain and polish silver, to clean a fireplace and mop polished marble floors.

they call her maid maleen.

~

the king has a son by his new wife, and then a daughter. they are pale and fair-haired like their mother, with only their dark eyes to show they are the king’s children. but they inherit none of their parents’ beauty, have faces that don’t look quite right and bodies that get stuck between gangly and chubby and never settle into one or the other. princess gisella and prince jan are privately regarded as unfortunate products of a lovely union.

maid maleen spends long hours working, and has neither the time nor funds for creams to soften her skin or oils to care for her hair, has never used face powder or lip color.

maid maleen is twenty three years old, and the most beautiful woman in the kingdom.

her braids are wrapped carefully atop her head, but when she lets them loose they hang past her hips. her dark skin is made even darker thanks to long hours working in the palace garden, and her eyes have never lost that same curious light. she walks straight and strong, years of hard labor giving her muscles and definition to her body that she never would have had as a princess. boys and girls give her long, considering looks and flirtatious smiles, and nobles have to double-take when she passes them by.

no one speaks of it anymore. but maid maleen looks ever more like her beautiful late mother, has the same eyes as her father, and dressing in ill-fitting cast offs and running her ragged can’t hide the truth.

maid maleen is the king’s daughter.

she has accepted her life as a maid in the palace she was one day set to inherit, and tries to see it as a gift. she sleeps with who she likes, may marry whichever of the charming boys from the city who’s smile she likes best. in the maids who raised her she has more mothers than she has fingers, and perhaps she longs for the days when she was a small princess, when she was the apple of her parents’ eye, when the whole of their nation was to be hers to inherit.

but then the blacksmith’s daughter lets her hands linger a little too long on her wrists, and maleen knows that she won’t be sleeping alone tonight. there are some things that worth more to her than a throne she was born to. she doesn’t miss the little girl she used to be.

until.

tensions have always run high between their kingdom and the neighboring one – too many squabbles over borders, over trade agreements, over patrols, over anything and everything the kings can find a reason to be upset about, it seems like. so when prince wolfgang is sent over, the whole palace is abuzz. the prince seems determined to inherit a peaceful land, and is coming over to talk with the king to do it.

maleen does not care for princes. nor for nobles of any rank, in fact. she remembers how they turned on her, she sees the small acts of pettiness and cruelty they thoughtlessly inflict on their servants, and she wants nothing to do with it. commoners may not be as educated as nobles, may not have as many objects to call their own, but maleen finds she prefers their company to that of lords. she’s uninterested in this prince, which is perhaps why she’s the one that gets sent to his rooms. her moms can trust that she at least won’t fawn over him.

“sir wolfgang,” she murmurs, pushing open his door and giving a low curtsy, keeping her eyes trained on his mud covered boots. “is there anything you require?”

silence. she can only stay bent in a curtsey so long before she loses patience. she’s almost given up on him, is about to cut her losses and call it a night when he says, hesitant, “queen sabine?”

her mother’s name is punch to her gut, and her head snaps up at the sound of it, the rolling fire of her temper bubbling just below her skin. “i am maid maleen,” she snaps, then tacks on “your highness,” after a moment’s consideration.

his cloak is half unbuttoned as he stares at her with a slack mouth. she supposes he would not look unhandsome if he were not currently doing his best to imitate a frog. he appears to be only a handful of years older than she is, and if she were not furious she would be impressed that he remembers her mother well enough to see sabine in her.

“maleen,” he repeats, and for a moment she wonders if he will recognize her as well, but he only says, “my apologies. if you would help me with my cloak, i would be much obliged.”

she’s instantly suspicious. she’s met nice nobles before, ones that were considerate and remembered her name and thanked her when she brought them wine. but she’s never met a nice prince before – they’re always of the worst sort. “yes, your highness,” she says, and the cloak is soaked through and clinging, it’s no wonder he’s struggling with it. once she’s gotten it off she hangs it to dry, then goes back to him. she slaps away his numb, struggling fingers and undoes the rest of the buckles and loops of his overly complicated clothing. she’s gotten down him down to an undershirt and pants when his hands grab hers. she blinks and looks up. he has freckles dusting across his nose.

“this is inappropriate,” he says, but honestly she’s stripped a lot of nobles, it wasn’t weird until he took her hands and looked at her like no one’s ever looked at her before.

“yes, your highness,” she agrees, and takes a step back. she places his clothes in front of a fire, curtsies, and leaves. she can feel the weight of his gaze on her all the way back to her room.

wolfgang continues his diplomatic agenda, having long meetings with the royal family. after, maleen goes and tends to him, setting out his food and taking care of his clothes, straightening up any mess that he’s made. at first he’s quiet, and he just watches her, but he quickly discovers that maleen has opinions and thoughts and isn’t afraid to share them. soon they’re debating the finer points of trade routes and arguing the effectiveness of a sliding tax scale, and maleen comes to cherish the evenings she spends with the prince, likes the way he speaks to her and looks at her, likes the shape of his smile.

weeks in she enters his room, dinner steaming in her hands and eager to continue their conversation about state funded orphanages versus a state funded foster system. he’s pacing and tense, shoulder stiff. “wolfgang,” she sets down the food and wipes her hands on her apron, “is something wrong?”

“is it true?” he asks, and he’s not looking at her. he’s always looked at her before.

“is what true?” she flinches away from his coldness, is already preparing to retreat and hide and beg someone else to watch over him.

he turns to her, and she’s baffled by the mixture of hope and anger on his face. “are you the king’s daughter? are you princess maleen?”

she takes a step back, “i am maid maleen.”

“please,” he follows her as she steps away from him, and her back hits the wall. he stops when he’s almost close enough to touch. “my father sent me here with the goal to seal our new treaty with a marriage. he expects me to marry princess gisella. but if you are the daughter of the king – then he will allow me to marry you instead!”

“who says i want to marry you?” she retorts, but he gets on bended knee and she freezes.

he holds a hand for her own, and against every bit of logic, she gives it to him. “maleen, i’ve never felt this way about anyone. i was willing enough to enter a loveless marriage before i knew what true love is, but now i do, and i can’t go back. marry me.”

she wants to. she thinks she loves him. she hadn’t been planning to fall in love with anyone. “i am the king’s daughter,” she tells him, “but i am no princess. i haven’t been a princess in a long time.”

he brings her hand to his mouth so he can kiss each one of her knuckles, “then we’ll have to change that.”

~

wolfgang goes to the king to make his case, to return maleen to her birthright and allow her to marry him.

it goes even worse than maleen had feared.

her father is furious. he’s so angry at the audacity of this request that prince wolfgang is thrown from the kingdom. so incensed is he, that guards drag maleen from her bed in the middle of the night and throw her into a tower. the door closes shut behind them, and she bangs on it and screams but no one comes for her.

there are no windows, and only one door with a sliding metal grate in the bottom. she’s high in the tower, she thinks, from the number of steps she’d been forced to climb, but she stands on a dirt floor. the room contains only the bare minimum needed for survival, and nothing more.

once a week food is slid through the slot in the door. she has to be careful, because if she eats it too fast they will not provide more, she will just starve. days turn to weeks turn to months, and she despairs of ever being let out of this tower. months turn to years, and she gives up hope entirely of leaving this tower. she considers refusing to eat, killing herself slowly through starvation, because death is preferable to life locked in this tower.

one night there’s a scuffle, and shouting, and for the first time since she was shoved inside the door opens. there’s a guard standing there, and princess gisella tentatively steps inside. “maid ma – i mean, maleen?”

maleen stares. this is the first time she’s seen another person in years, and suddenly for all the screaming she’d done she can’t find her voice. gisella takes another cautious step forward, “maleen, please – we don’t have much time.” she holds out her hand, “come with me.”

gisella is sixteen now. although she’ll never be a great beauty, she’s grown into many of the features that she was once mocked for. “where?” she asks, but takes gisella’s hand and lets her lead them down the twisting staircase. anyplace is better than the tower.

“i’m to be married in a week’s time to prince wolfgang.” maleen feels a sharp pain go through her chest. had wolfgang forgotten her? their farce of a romance was such a quick, shallow thing. she was a fool to fall for it in the first place. “i’m not going to show up. you are.”

she stares, “what?”

“wolfgang started a war over father locking you in the tower,” she explains, “but eventually it got to a point where neither could justify it, so our father and wolfgang’s decided our union would mean peace between our countries, as intended. but i don’t want to marry prince wolfgang, and he does not want to marry me.”

“i don’t understand,” she hadn’t paid much attention to the girl when they were in the palace together, and she’s regretting that now.

they finally reach the end of the tower. it’s the first time she’s breathed fresh air in years. she tries not to get distracted by it, and instead focuses on the carriage to her left, and the pure black mare laden like a pack mule on her right. “i’m leaving,” gisella says, “i don’t want to be wolfgang’s bride because i want to be klaus’s,” the guard smiles, and he must be klaus, the princess is rejecting a prince to run away with a commoner. “there’s a map and everything you need in the saddlebags. the wedding dress is waiting for you at the castle. no one will know you’re not me until wolfgang unveils you, and by then it will be too late. he will marry you, and i will be gone.”

“why are you doing this?” she asks.

gisella shrugs, “you’re my sister, and father is an idiot. i want you to be happy, and i want wolfgang to be happy, and i want to be happy too. this way we all get what we want. our brother will be waiting for you in wolfgang’s castle. he’ll help you.”

maleen is speechless. gisella grabs her in a quick hug – the only one they’ve ever shared – and then goes to the carriage with klaus trailing behind her. “i’ll see you again, princess maleen!”

she doesn’t have time for tears. she gets on the mare, and rides for the palace of the neighboring land.

~

she makes it just in time. she sneaks into the castle the night before the wedding, ducking around servants until she find her way to jan’s door. she knocks, tentative, wondering if this was a mistake and all one elaborate trap. but the door opens and his face slackens in relief, “finally!” he pulls her inside, and sits her down. there’s lukewarm water waiting for her so she can clean herself, and jan stands with his back to her the whole time, outlining the wedding and how it will go so she knows what to expect the next day. “father isn’t here,” he assures her, “he didn’t want to leave the kingdom, so i’m here in his stead.”

“won’t you miss your sister?” maleen finishes washing and wraps herself in a soft blanket.

“when i am king, gisella will return,” he says confidently, “she will come home and bring klaus, and you will rule here with wolfgang, and all will be well. our countries shall be great allies when it is me and wolfgang on the throne.”

he’s only a year older than gisella, just seventeen, and maleen feels oddly old next to them, feels old next to these children who know what they want and take it and don’t let anything stand in their way.

“we need to get your hair rebraided,” he says, “you should look perfect tomorrow. it’s your wedding day.”

she stares, aghast. “that will take all night!”

“i’ve brought help,” he says, and sends a servant down the hall. the servant returns with a half dozen of the maids who raised her, and who crowd forward and hug her and kiss her cheeks and say how much they’ve missed her. princess or not, bride or not, to them she will always be their little maid maleen.

~

it’s clear gisella picked her wedding dress with maleen in mind. it fits her for one thing, and is clinging and heavy, and it must have looked awful on gisella, but on her it’s perfect. her dress is accompanied by white silk gloves and a thick veil so that no one can see her, so that no one will know she’s not the daughter of the king they’re expecting to be there.

wolfgang is at the end of the aisle, looking like he’s going to an execution, and it takes more self control than maleen was anticipating not to go running to him. she turns to him, and he lifts her veil. he sees her and freezes, mouth sliding open. she winks at him, because they just need to keep it together until they’re married, he just has to keep his cool for a few minutes and they’ll have won it all. wolfgang closes his mouth and says nothing about how this is clearly not the bride he was supposed to marry. they turn so none of the guests can see them, and the priest gives maleen a confused look, but with a glare from wolfgang he continues on with the ceremony as if nothing is out of place.

“you may now kiss the bride,” the priest says, after what seems like an eternity.

wolfgang grabs her about the waist, dips her, and kisses her soundly on the mouth. her veil falls off and she can hear the horrified and shocked gasps of the guests, and under that jan’s laughter. when they break apart, foreheads still pressed together, she whispers, “hello, prince wolfgang.”

he kisses her again, quick and sweet, and does nothing at all to disguise the joy in his face. “hello, princess maleen.”

and they all lived happily ever after.


read more retold fairytales here

Doomed — Min Yoongi

Words: 5390

Warnings: demon!Yoongi + angst + filthy smut + fluff

Description: Arent people supposed to be scared when they find out that a demon has been stalking them?

This amazing moodboard was created by @candys-and-moons so everyone go follow them right now!!! They’re amazing :)

[01] [02] [03] [04] [05] [06]

Let me know if I should make a part two to this :)

~

Everyone gets that feeling when they feel that someone is watching them. Monitoring everything they do. Stalking them.

That’s how you felt almost everyday. It was as if someone was actually watching you. Or spying on you.

You began to think like this since you were little. About 10 years old. Whenever you were somewhere, you felt a presence, even when you were alone. It was like someone was always there with you. It started off simple, but got worse and creepier as you grew older.

When you were 13, you couldn’t stand being home alone, because you always felt that someone was going to come for you. You would hear strange noises such as people talking when you were home alone, cabinets closing on their own, footsteps when no one else was home.

By age 15, you watched a lot of horror movies, and deemed your experiences as “being haunted.” You were sure that you were being haunted by a ghost, or something like a ghost. There were no other explanations for the things that’s been happening to you.

You told your friends and your parents, but no one believed you. Everyone thought you were either joking, or just crazy.

When you were 16, you asked your parents to get paranormal experts to come to your house and see what was going on. Your parents were reluctant at first, telling you that maybe a therapist should come to the house instead. But you kept asking them, telling them that you were so scared that something might happen to you. And then they finally called the experts.

When they came, the concluded that there was nothing paranormal going on inside of your house, giving your parents another reason not believe anything you said.

Even though the “experts” said that there was nothing, you knew there was something. You always knew that there was something going on. You weren’t crazy, no matter how much people tell you that you are.

You will never forget about when you were 18. You were almost finished with school. You remember sitting in an empty classroom one day during your free period. You studied for a huge test that you had to take.

The room was quiet at first, but then you heard a quiet tap on the window. You didn’t think much of it, thinking that it was probably just a tree branch or something.

Then it happened again. And again. And again. This continued for about two minutes before it started upsetting you. You groaned and tried to concentrate on studying. Once you groaned, the sound stopped. It was probably just a coincidence.

It didn’t stop there. You heard something fall down. It was a light sound, but you still heard it. You looked around the room to see what it was. There was a piece of chalk rolling towards you.

You raised and eyebrow. How did the chalk fall if nothing was touching it?

You stood up, picking up the piece of chalk that had fallen. You walked to the chalk board and placed the piece of chalk onto the teacher’s desk.

You turned around, dusted your hands off and started walking back to your seat.

And that’s when you heard it. The sound of the chalk falling again. You thought nothing of it. The teachers desk was probably just slanted, which is why the chalk keeps falling off. But why didn’t anything else on the desk fall off?

You turned around, bending down to pick up the chalk once again. You stood up, holding the piece of white chalk and as you looked up, you saw something strange.

The chalkboard had something written on it.

“Specto tu. Protinus te videre, XXI.”

Those words were not on the board before. How did it get there? Who wrote it? What the hell did it even say?

You thanked god for modern technology as you took out your cellphone and took a picture of the words written on the chalkboard. You put the picture into a translator website and waited for it to do its magic.

As the page loaded, you read what the words had translated to.

“I’m watching you. See you soon, 21.”

If you weren’t already creeped out before, you were ten times more creeped out now.

Without even thinking about it, you packed up your books and left the room, not looking back.

Who wrote that? Who’s watching you?

The answers to you questions went unanswered for years after that. You were always so curious.

You were 20 years old when you moved out of your parents house and into your own apartment.

The strange things never stopped. On multiple occasions when you would walk into your apartment, you would see lights that were turned on (and you were sure that you had turned them off), cabinets were open, loose papers were scattered all over your desk. You were a very clean and organized person, so you knew that it couldn’t have been you.

Getting a surveillance camera installed in your house didn’t help, as much as you really wanted it to. It just gave you more reason to believe your 15 year old self when you said that something paranormal was going on.

When you got home from work, you would check your camera, seeing if anything happened.

Of course something happened.

The cabinets opened—by themselves. The drawers in your desk opened and papers flew out of them, creating a big mess. The light switched flicked on, on their own.

You were terrified. Something was haunting you and you wanted to know why.

Today was your 21st birthday.

You spent the day shopping with your friends. You weren’t really a party girl, so you decided to do something less wild and more fun. Shopping is always fun.

“This would look really nice on you, y/n!” One of your friends smiled, giving you a cute pink dress that she had picked up.

It was cute, but it wasn’t really your style, so you put it back as you friend walked to go look at other clothes. After returning the dress to the rack that it had previously been on, you turned around, only to bump into someone.

“I’m so sorry.” You apologized. It was a man. He had jet black hair and dark brown eyes. He was quite handsome.

“Don’t be sorry. It was my fault.” He says, patting his clothes as he stood in front of you.

You two stood there, just looking at each other for a couple of seconds. He stared into your eyes. It was like he could see right through your soul. You couldn’t look away. It was like you were dazed.

“Y/n, come on. Let’s go to another shop.” Your friend calls. You blinked a few times, snapping out of your daze.

You walked away from the man, following as your friends walked out of the shop.

He seemed so familiar, but you were sure you hadn’t seen him before. You’d never seen him in real life, or even pictures, so why did he seem familiar?


You closed the door of your apartment and took your shoes off, placing them beside the door.

You and your friends had a good time out, shopping, eating and gossiping. It was like you were in high school all over again. You missed hanging out with them all the time.

You plopped down on the couch, grabbing the tv remote and pressing the button to turn it on.

You pressed the button, but nothing happened. You pressed it over and over again, but nothing. Maybe the batteries were out?

Just then, you felt something brush past your leg. Without thinking, you yelped and placed your feet on the couch, looking down at what had touched you.

It was a cat.

What was a cat doing in your apartment?

The cat looked up at you. It had black fur and brown eyes.

“What are you doing in here?” You asked the cat, as if it would talk back. You stood up, still looking down at the cat.

“I should get you out of here. Your owner is probably looking for you.” You say, putting your arms out, but then retracting them, not knowing if you should touch the cat.

Suddenly, something happened. You weren’t sure what it was exactly, but all you saw was a flash of white and then something stood in front of you. It wasn’t the cat.

It was a man.

You screamed and ran into your bedroom, scared for your life. You didn’t bother to look at the man, you were too terrified.

You closed your bedroom door as you entered, locking it.

What the hell just happened?

“Y/n.” You heard a voice say. The voice was kind of deep. You were too scared to reply. How did he even know your name?

“Y/n, I hope you know that locking the door isn’t going to stop me from coming in.” The man says.

You stayed silent. You didn’t know what to say. What were you supposed to say?

You heard no more noise on the other side of the door, but you were still scared.

Then, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You didn’t want to turn around, but your feet had it’s own plans.

You turned around, coming face to face with—

The man from earlier. The one from the shop. The one that you bumped into.

Your eyes widened.

You backed up, hoping that you could run away, but for every step you took back, he took a step towards you.

“Why are you here? Why were you a cat? How were you a cat? Who are you? What are you?” You asked. You had so many questions and they all came out at the same time.

“I’d rather not show you my actual form, for your sake. And do you know how much strength it takes to shift into a cat? You should be praising me. I’m so tired right now.” The man complained.

What was his “actual form”?

“What are you?” You repeated your question.

“A demon.” He said. “Yeah, right.” You say, not believing him. The man chuckled before closing his eyes. What was he doing?

As he opened his eyes, his dark brown eye color was no longer there. Now his pupils were a fiery red color.

You yelled and tried to run away, but he held your arms, not letting you move.

“Let go of me!” You yelled.

“Y/n, calm down.” He says, his eyes going back to their original color. “How am I supposed to calm down? You—you just—I can't—” you stuttered, not knowing what to say.

He stared into your eyes and you felt yourself calming down. It was like he casted a spell on you or something.

“Did you just cast a spell on me? Are you a witch too?” You ask, not able to take your eyes off of his.

He chuckled. “I’m not a witch. I’m a demon. A handsome one.”

You wish you could roll your eyes at his comment. “Who are you?” You ask. “And why do you seem so familiar? I’m almost one-hundred percent sure that we’ve never met.”

“Y/n, I’ve been with you since you were young. Don’t you remember me? Haven’t you got my little notes and messages?” He asks you.

“What messages?”

“Specto tu. Protinus te videre, XXI.” He spoke.

Your eyes widened. That’s what was written on the chalkboard that day you were in school! “You wrote that? How? Why? Why couldn’t I see you?”

“Being a demon surprisingly has its many perks. One of them being invisibility. And it was a reminder. Didn’t you translate it?” He asked you.

“It said I’m watching you. And see you soon. Then it said twenty one.” You say.

“I was watching you. I’ve always been watching you. And it was a reminder because I’d see you on your twenty-first birthday, which is today.” He explains, letting go of your hands. “Happy Birthday, by the way.”

It was him. He was the thing that was always with you. The thing that creeped you out. The thing that you always knew was watching you.

You brought your hand up to his face and slapped him, anger filling you.

His eyes widened and he held his cheek in pain. “What was that for?” He asks.

“You! You’re the reason that I spent almost eleven years of my life scared to death! I was always so scared, and it was because of you! You messed me up, man.” You explained.

“I’m sorry?” He said, but it sounded more like a question.

You slapped him again.

“What was that one for?” He asks.

“That’s for messing up my house when I’m not home. You always leave my lights on. And you leave my cabinets open. And all of my papers are always all over my desk.” You say.

“I’m sorry. I get bored sometimes when you’re not home.” He admits.

“Who are you?” You ask.

“I’m Yoongi. Min Yoongi. You’re y/n y/l/n.” He finally introduces himself.

“Well, Min Yoongi. You’ve been stalking me for eleven years, why?” You question.

People supposed to be scared when they find out that a demon has been stalking them for so long, so, why didn’t you feel scared?

“You’re interesting.” He says, simply.

You rolled your eyes, finally out of his spell, or whatever it was.

After a moment of silence, Yoongi spoke up. “I’m not here to hurt you, so if you’re scared of me, you don’t have to be. Although, I’m not getting any scared vibes from you. You’re not scared of me?”

You shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I am. I just think that I was more scared when I didn’t know who or what you were.” You admit.

“Really? Then maybe I should erase your memory.” He smirked.

“No. No way.” You say. “I was joking.” He chuckled. “Or was I?”

“Min Yoongi I swear to—” you started. “Don’t say it.” He warns you, eyes turning red.

“Sorry. Sorry.” You apologized, looking down at the floor so you wouldn’t have to look into his eyes.

Yoongi took a deep breath before speaking again. “You should go to bed. It’s late.”

“It’s 6 pm.” You tell him.

“So? It’s never too early to go to sleep.”

You shook your head before opening your bedroom door and walking out into your living room.

“What are you still doing here? Leave!” You hear Yoongi say. He wasn’t talking to you, so who was he talking to?

You turned around to look at him, but he was facing the kitchen. In the kitchen stood another man. He looked the same age as Yoongi, maybe younger. He had orangish/reddish hair. You noticed something. In front of him, on the counter was a cake. That wasn’t there before.

“Who is this?” You asked.

“I’m Hoseok.” The boy with the orange hair smiled at you, walking over to where you and Yoongi were standing. “I’m Yoongi’s friend.”

“Hi.” You said before looking at Yoongi. “So what? Is my house like a demon magnet now?”

“Hoseok, get out.” Yoongi said, not answering your question.

Hoseok sighed and looked at you. “It was nice to meet you. Bye.” He smiled before you saw a flash of white. He was gone.

You looked over to where the cake was. Yoongi saw where you were looking and spoke. “It’s yours.” He says.

“Is it?” You asked, walking over to the cake.

“I told Hoseok to bring it for you. It looks good, right?” He asks.

You saw what was written on the cake and smiled.

“Happy Birthday, y/n.”

“As long as you share it with me, I promise I won’t trash your house anymore.” He smiled.

Despite being a demon, Yoongi was a nice guy. Maybe you wouldn’t mind having him around.


“We need to have another girl’s day out.” Your friend says. She was sitting beside you on the couch in your apartment.

“Yeah. I want to hang out with you and the rest of the girls more.” You tell her.

“We should go to a club or something.” She suggested.

A club? “I don’t think so.” You say. You weren’t really a fan of going to the club. The club is just a place where random guys try to hit on you all night, and you didn’t want to go through that.

“Oh, come on, y/n. Don’t be such a party pooper. We could go out to the club and have fun. You could meet a guy there!” She persisted.

“Why would I want to meet a guy there?” You asked.

“Y/n, you haven’t gotten laid in like a year. You need to meet a guy so you two can hook up! You really need some d—” Your friend explained, but was cut off by someone else talking over her.

“What’s this talk about y/n needing to meet a guy?” The person asked. You recognized the voice and turned around to see Yoongi.

“Y/n, who is this?” Your friend asks.

“This is—” You started. “I’m Yoongi. Y/n’s boyfriend.” Yoongi finished for you.

Your boyfriend? Since when?

“Y/n! How could you not tell me that you have a boyfriend?” Your friend questions.

“I’m sorry, y/f/n.” You looked at your friend. “I wasn’t planned on letting you meet him. He promised me that he would stay in my bedroom while you came over.” You looked back at Yoongi.

“Sorry. I got bored in there.” He shrugs. “Y/f/n, would you mind coming back another time? I need to speak to y/n about something.”

“No problem. I’ll be on my way.” Y/f/n says, before getting up and walking to the door. She winked at you before leaving and closing the door behind her.

You turned around, only to see that Yoongi was closer to you than he was before. “You’re my boyfriend?” You asked. “Since when?”

“Since now.” He states. “Is it true?” He asked, not giving you time to respond to his statement.

“Is what true?”

“She said you haven’t been laid in a year. Is that true?”

“Does that matter to you?” You ask, raising your eyebrow. Why did he want to know?

“Just tell me.”

“What if it is true? Why do you need to know?”

Yoongi took two slow steps towards you so he was now standing on front of you with barely any space between you.

Would it be wrong to say he looked really hot right now?

While living with Yoongi, you can’t help but look at him sometimes. Like the times you two are just talking to each other and he smiles. You like his smile. A lot.

And the times he would come out of the bathroom only wearing boxers. His hair would be wet and he looks so good. You didn’t know if it was okay for you to think about him this way.

“You seriously went that long without getting laid? You went that long without letting someone touch you? Pleasure you?” He asks. As he spoke, you felt his warm breath on your lips. “It’s been about three months since I revealed myself to you. We spend like all day together, so why haven’t you told me?”

“Can we not talk about this? It’s embarrassing.” You say, turning around so you could walk away. When you turned around, Yoongi grabbed one of your arms and turned you back to face him.

“Yoongi, I—” You started, but Yoongi looked into your eyes and suddenly you couldn’t say anything. He was controlling you.

For about thirty seconds, he just stared into your eyes, and you were unable to say or do anything else.

Yoongi put his fingers on your chin and lifted your head up. He almost instantly lowered his head and attached his lips to your neck.

His actions made your eyes widen. “Y-Yoongi.” You stuttered, finally able to speak again.

He hummed in response and started kissing and sucking on your neck. It felt unbelievably good.

“Yoongi. Yoongi, wait.” You spoke, putting your hands on his shoulders and pushing him away. He looked at you and raised an eyebrow. “Why are you doing this?” You asked him.

“You don’t want me to do it?” He asks. “I-I didn’t say that. I just—” You started. “Then shut up and let me do what I need to do.” He speaks over you, pressing his lips against yours after he finished talking.

His lips felt so good against yours. You didn’t realize how much you liked his lips until this moment.

Yoongi held your waist with one hand, pulling you against him. You used one hand to run fingers through his hair and the other hand was still rested on his shoulder.

His tongue entered your mouth, exploring it and even meeting with your tongue.

You lightly tugged on his hair, causing him to groan into your mouth. Hearing him groan sent waves of pleasure down your body. You wanted more.

Yoongi pulled away from you, removing your shirt and his shirt before placing his lips back on yours.

You placed one of your hands on his neck, slowly trailing down to his chest, and then to the bulge that was evident in his pants.

You palmed him through the black sweatpants he wore and once again, he groaned into your mouth.

Yoongi placed his hand at the hem of your pants and pushed them down. You stopped out of them, now only left in your bra and underwear.

You pushed Yoongi’s sweatpants and boxers down and he stepped out of them before breaking away from you and sitting down on the couch.

“On your knees, baby girl.” He says to you. You did as told and got on your knees, coming face to face with his length. Yoongi leaned forward and removed your bra before speaking. “Be a good girl and suck.”

You nodded before putting one of your hands on his length, stroking it a couple of times before putting your lips around the tip. You decide to tease him by licking and sucking the tip, and only the tip.

“If you keep teasing me like that, you’re gonna be in big trouble, y/n.” Yoongi speaks in a stern voice. Trying to push his buttons, you continued to do what you were doing.

Yoongi got fed up and placed his hand on the back of your head. “It seems like you want trouble.” He says before pushing your head down onto his length. You took more of him in your mouth. He began thrusting his hips into your mouth, making you take in all of it.

The back of you throat stung, but you loved every second of it. “You love it when I do this, don’t you, y/n?” Yoongi asked, as if you could answer.

Suddenly, he pulled you off of him, standing up and picking you up. You wrapped your legs around his waist so you wouldn’t fall.

He walked to your bedroom, and while he walked, you felt his length brush against your core, which was still covered by your underwear. You sucked in a breath at the contact, causing Yoongi to laugh.

When he got you your room, Yoongi rested you on the bed, wasting no time before getting on top of you and attacking your lips with his.

Yoongi used this position as an advantage to grind down onto your clothed core, causing you to moan inside of his mouth. He chuckled before removing his lips from yours and putting them on one of your breasts. He used one of his hands to touch the breast that his lips weren’t on. He alternated between both breasts. You loved the feeling he was giving you.

Yoongi looked up at you, pressing his lips to yours as he slid your underwear off, both of you were both completely naked now.

“I’ve wanted to do this to you for so long, baby.” Yoongi admits before running his fingers up and down your folds. “You’re so wet for me. I love it, babe.”

You moaned as he stuck two fingers into you, not giving you time to adjust to them. Since you were so wet, his fingers glided in and out easily. He curled his fingers inside of you, touching the special spot that make you gasp.

“Yoongi.” You moaned. “What is it, baby girl?” He asks.

You just wanted him inside of you already.

You moaned again and since you didn’t answer his question, Yoongi spoke again. “Use your words, baby. Unless you’re not going to get what you want.” He smirked.

“You’re such a tease.” You say as his fingers kept going in and out of you. “I’m just getting started.” He says, pressing his fingers against your spot.

“Yoongi! Fuck!” You yelled, shutting your eyes tightly. “What do you want, baby girl?” He asks.

“I want you, inside of me.” You said. “I am inside of you.” He said.

“No. I want your cock inside of me. Right now, Yoongi.” You finally say. “You want my cock? Beg for it, baby.” He responds.

“Please, Yoongi.  I can’t wait anymore. I need to fuck me right now. I’m so wet for you. Please.” You begged. “Well, since you asked so nicely.” He smiled, taking his fingers out of you.

He kissed your lips before aligning his length with your entrance. He gave you no time to prepare, or get used to it as he slid inside of you and began to thrust in and out of you at a fast pace.

He used one hand to prop himself up and placed the other hand on your thigh, gripping it as he easily pushed and pulled himself in and out of you.

He angled his hips a certain way and his length repeatedly pressed against your special spot as he went inside of you. “Oh my—yoongi!” You yelled, enjoying the pleasure that was being given to you.

“You like that? You like when I fuck you like this, y/n?” He asks before placing his lips on your neck.

He continued to thrust in and out of you at a fast pace. You were basically shaking from pleasure underneath him.

“Yoongi, I’m so close.” You informed him, feeling your orgasm reach closer and closer.

“I’m not letting you cum that easily. Beg me if you want to cum.” He tells you, looking at you.

You shook your head, teasing him.

Yoongi raised an eyebrow, shocked that you refused to obey him in a situation like this.

“Beg me.” He repeats himself.

You closed your eyes and bit your lip, holding back any sounds that would come from your mouth.

Yoongi suddenly pulled himself out of you completely before turning you so that you were laying with your stomach against the bed.

“On your hands and knees.” He instructs. You listened and did as told, having your ass on full display for him.

“I can’t believe you were being such a bad girl just then.” Yoongi says, rubbing both of your ass cheeks with his hands. “Do you know what bad girls get?” He asks.

You shook your head. “Bad girls get punished.” He tells you, just as you felt a sharp pain on your butt cheek.

“Never.” *spank* “Disobey.” *spank* “Me.” *spank* “Again.” *spank*

He spanked you a couple more times and surprisingly, the pain felt good to you. You loved it.

You laid there, taking the hits. A few tears escaped your eyes, but it didn’t matter to you. You loved everything that was happening.

When Yoongi was finished, he caressed your cheeks, running his hands over all the spots he hit.

He flipped you back around without warning, almost immediately slamming his length back into you, causing you to scream out his name.

“I know you want to cum, so you better beg me.” He said into your ear. It sounded more like a growl, which turned you on even more. Your orgasm was so close.

“Please let me cum, Yoongi. It’s so close. You make me feel so good, baby. I need you to let me cum.” You begged, tired of waiting.

Yoongi smirked pressed a quick kiss against your lips before looking at you.

“You can cum, princess. Cum all over me, baby.” He spoke while thrusting in and out of you, again at a fast pace. “Just make sure you look at me while you cum, okay? Keep your eyes open for me, baby.”

You moaned, feeling your orgasm come closer and closer until you felt the tight knot in your stomach finally unravel. Your orgasm washed over you, taking you into a state of pure bliss.

You looked into Yoongi’s eyes as you came, obeying what he said before. You had the urge to close your eyes, but Yoongi stared into yours, not letting you close them.

“Fuck, Yoongi.” You breathed. “I’m close, y/n.” Yoongi tells you as he continued thrusting.

You began to tremble from overstimulation, but you loved every second of it.

Yoongi let out a string of curse words as you finally felt him release inside of you. His warm liquid filled you up.

He thrusted slowly, a few more times before pulling out of you and laying down beside you.

The room was filled with nothing more than the sound of the two of you trying to catch your breaths.

“That was amazing.” You admit, turning your head to look at the man beside you. As you looked at him, you saw that he was already looking at you.

“You can say that again.” He smiles at you.

“That was amaz—” You started again. “Don’t actually say it again.” Yoongi says, playfully rolling his eyes.

You giggled as he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer to him. You rested your head on his chest.

“Yoongi,” you started, looking up at him. “Yes, baby girl?” He asked.

“I know you’re a demon and everything, but can demons have relationships? Or is that like, against the demon code or something?” You asked him.

“You want a relationship?” He asked you. “Do you?” You ask.

Yoongi nodded and you smiled. “Then yes.” You spoke, biting your lip.

“Y/n, do you want to be my girlfriend?” He asks.

“Yes.” You nodded and Yoongi smiled at you.

Without telling you what he was doing, Yoongi brought one of his wrists up to his mouth and bit down, hard.

You raised an eyebrow, confused, but deciding not to ask any questions yet.

When he pulled away from his wrist, you saw the blood leaking from his arm.

He placed his bleeding wrist in front of your mouth. “Drink.” He instructs.

“Okay, you’ve asked me to do a lot of stuff today. This is the weirdest one.” You admit.

“Just do it. If you don’t hurry up, blood is going to get all over your sheets and I’m not washing them.” He tells you.

You rolled your eyes before opening your mouth. Yoongi pushed his wrist to your mouth and you licked the blood off of it, swallowing it.

When he pulled his wrist away, it wasn’t bleeding anymore. He smiled and looked at you, putting his index finger and thumb on your chin. He brought your mouth up to his and kissed you.

“So what am I now?” You asked as you pulled away from his lips. “Am I demon now? Or am I a vampire or something? I think I saw something like this on the Vampire Diaries one time.” You tell him.

“You’re still human.” Yoongi chuckled.

“What?” You ask. “So I drank your blood for no reason?” You pouted.

“It was for a reason. Your mine now, and if anything or anyone who’s supernatural gets close to you, they’ll know that you’re mine.” He explains.

“So you marked me?” You asked and he nodded.

“This is cool. Who would’ve thought that the thing that was haunting me for eleven years was actually a really cute demon who I like very much.” You say.

Yoongi playfully rolled his eyes.

“Go to sleep, loser.”

Whiskey

A Bucky Barnes One-Shot

Character Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Word Count: 5,717 (yup…)

Warnings: NSFW 18+ Smut! Sexual penetration, oral (male and female receiving), face sitting, dirty talk, language, drinking, Bucky being everyone’s wet dream…

A/N: I’m so sorry this took so long, but I worked HARD on this one and I’m totally proud of it! (and before anyone asks, Howl at the Moon is a real bar in Indiana!) Enjoy. :) 



You stood in the street and looked up at the new sign that was being hung up in front of the building.

Howl at the Moon

Your pride and joy. You smiled with a shake of your head. This bar had just started out a little hole in wall. Nobody knew about it, and you were barely making ends meet with only 2 people on staff.

Now, it was a world-renowned biker bar. People from all over the globe have stopped in. You have worked hard to make it what it is. The many roaring engines from motorcycles and loud laughter rule this spot.

It kept your life interesting.

The alcohol stays flowing all night long and the grill stays hot. Your most popular item on the menu? Beer served in buckets. You would be surprised at how many buckets these burly bikers can put away.

Sing-a-longs, dance-offs and dirty humor keep your patrons coming back for more. Your lady bartenders have been known to jump on the bar to dance to some old rock n’ roll. Yourself included.

Ashley, your best friend, came up beside you and looked at the sign as well. “It looks fantastic.”

You poked her with your elbow, “Well I would hope you think so, you drew up the concept.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and tipped her head, “I’m a genius.”

You looked up at the black wolf, nose pointed up at a blue moon with a howl. It was really going to stand out at night when it was all lit up.

Keep reading

Working with Earth

Originally posted by pizsimokus

Our Earth is beautiful and majestic. There are many ways that you can connect to our beloved world because it is one of the two elements that you can actually touch. I love our Earth, feeling the vibrations going through my body is one hell of an experience. 

Here is a list of different ways to connect to our Earth. 

  • Go outside. Whether you have a special place in your neighborhood, your backyard, or a park; go to that place and sit there. Place your hands on the Earth and feel the heartbeat vibrate through you. 
  • Do yoga outside, with a mat or not (your choice). Let the Earth steady and form you. 
  • Plant a garden. Fill your space and let it flourish. NOTE: Be mindful, plant things that won’t harm your health or others or pets. Do your research. Gardening takes time, patience, and all of your love. You must dedicate yourself. 
  • Take a walk and collect what comes to you. NOTE: Be mindful. Do not collect anything harmful to your health, do your research and keep a notebook or a book on you that can help you identify plants. Only collect items that happen to fall upon your path. Do not pluck, pull, rip, cut. Not only is it disrespecting, it will hurt the plants and not let them grow properly afterwards.
  • Make a special Earth altar, preferably facing North. Fill it with colors of greens and browns, special items you have collected, crystals, rocks, coins, Mother Earth symbols, statues of trees, etc. Anything that is related to Earth. 
  • Make a sigil that means “I connect to my bountiful Earth and protected by her arms.” or something along the lines. (Again, I am not a sigil maker but something I would like to include for others who are) Wear the sigil on you as you go on walk or take hikes.
  • Be respectful to animals. (I feel) they are messengers of the Earth, (I feel) they watch us for a reason. 
  • Talk to the trees. Learn from the wisdom they have to offer. 
  • Research Gnomes, they are protectors of our Earth. NOTE: Like working with any spirit, do your research and be respectful. I don’t have any resources to give with working with Gnomes but here are a couple ways I have personally used. 
    • Leave offerings (like flowers or rocks you have collected in the past or food like bread) inside a tree or under a rock. NOTE: Be careful, make sure you are not disturbing an animals home.  
    • Leave currency (coins) to offer respect for all they have done to keep our Earth stable. NOTE: Make sure you do this somewhere that others won’t steal your offering. Make sure it is hidden where only Gnomes can get to it. EX. under a rock or if you have a backyard have a special place in the corner of your yard for this kind of offering.
    • Be kind to the Earth. Don’t liter, recycle, and show them you are one with the Earth. They care and respect seeing how we can be caring to our Earth.
    • Join a volunteer group that helps to clean up our Earth or make your own group. Check local listing online for your town.

Elements: 

Air
Water 
Fire