how many have i made today

4

Yixing + plushies and kisses

Every Time We Touch
Cascada
Every Time We Touch

Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky
They wipe away tears that I cry
The good and the bad times,
we’ve been through them all
You make me rise when I fall

‘Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling
And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly
Can’t you feel my heart beat fast?
I want this to last
Need you by my side 

Someone’s YA Dystopian Future novel is going to feature one character being a natural leader and then revealing:

“I was at the Fyre Festival in 2017.”

The whole camp went quiet, with the exception of Daran, who swore softly. Chelsea looked like she was about to cry; Pete laughed softly with disbelief. “You were at the Fyre Festival?”

Craig nodded slowly, his gaze not leaving the flames in front of him. “One of the first ones in. One of the last ones out.”

Susan furrowed her brow, trying to piece the words together. Would it be inappropriate to ask him? Was it a religious thing? A massacre?

“What’s a Fire Festival?” The question slipped from her lips before she could help it, and suddenly all eyes were on her–all except Craig’s. The fire still flickered inside them.

“There was just one. The Fyre Festival, with a ‘y’. They thought it was clever.” He sighed, stroked his beard, and shifted a little before continuing. “It was supposed to be a simple weekend in the Bahamas. Me and a bunch of other rich kids packed our clothes, gathered our things, and took a plane down south. Everything was going smoothly…but when we hit the first landing strip, that’s when we started to realize that something had gone awry. Instead of seeing a private beach in front of us, we saw a crowded tourist trap. We were promised private jets, fancy boats, the full VIP experience…” His eyes flicked up to her, and though his mouth curved up in a smile, the eyes did not share in it. “But none of that was anywhere to be seen. We thought it would be fine, all we had to do was get our things, make sure they were together, and they’d lead us to the hotel, but…it was already growing dark, and that’s when the luggage arrived. Unloaded from one of those giant storage containers, the big ones, like you see on the docks. Just tossed out to the crowd, one after another. No conveyer belts, no lockers, no express deliveries to the rooms…and it was when I finally got my bag, with a dented crease along the side, like it had been resting under someone’s golf clubs, that I realized: everything had gone wrong.

“Anyway, I’m standing there with this bag, and it occurs to me how hungry I am, so I start looking for the restaurant. I was young, and foolish…fortunately, Gabe was young and foolish, too, so we both headed off to find the restaurant, thinking it would be there.”

His smile widened, showing those teeth again. “There was no restaurant. They fed us sandwiches–small, flat, flimsy sandwiches, with that bread you see on a gas station shelf, and some meat they said was ham. A single wilted piece of lettuce and a piece of rubbery cheese were the condiments, if you could call them that…Gabe said he saw someone with a ketchup packet. I didn’t believe him. Served in a white styrofoam box.

“Anyway, this would be regal fare to us today, but back then, to us, it might as well have been cow dung. I saw three people vomiting their food right back out; the girl next to me saw the same thing, and she became number four. I don’t know how many of us managed to actually choke our way through the meal, or how many of us actually made it back to go onto the plane, but I do know this: there were two thousand of us left in that village when the last boat left the island. Two thousand of us left to fend for ourselves. 

“When the sun rose the next day, we were one thousand nine hundred and ninety four. Four of us were missing; two were dead. It was then that I realized that this was going to be a live-or-die situation. I chose to live.”


I would continue with this but it is late and I needed sleep an hour ago.

OT3 Ideas
  •  So the two of us are having this lovely lunch date at a cafe when some asshole on rollerblades crashes into our table and we all tumble to the ground together in a sprawl of limbs and bodies
  • We all like to sleep in the same bed at night, but somehow one of us always ends up pushing the other two off the fucking bed
  • I’m having this epic paintball fight and I’m recruiting team mates randomly so here you two take these guns and try not to get shot don’t ask questions oH SHIT HERE THEY COME
  • I’m sitting on a toilet in a public restroom and I’ve been singing because I thought I was by myself but all of a sudden two other people join in from the stalls around me and now we have this epic three part harmony going on, so this has to be the best poop break I have ever taken
  • You’ve been studying for this really tough test that’s coming up and the two of us know you need a break so we started a pillow fight but holy shit do you take this seriously oH MY GOD NO
  • So we’re on this long ass 12 hour flight and we’re sitting in a three seat setup in coach, and the person in the middle has fallen asleep so now us two on the end have made a game of how many things we can put on the middle person’s sleeping body/face before they wake up
  • WE’VE BEEN STUCK IN THIS ELEVATOR FOR EIGHT GODDAM HOURS AND IT’S REALLY FUCKING HOT SO I’M STRIPPING AND IF YOU TWO HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT THEN TAKE IT UP WITH MY BARE ASS
  • Ok one of you two flatfoots stole my wallet and I’m going to pat both of you down and helloooo I failed to realize how hot you two were
  • We all wore the same shirt today, and I so wore it better you copycat bitches
  • How did all three of us decide to rob the same fucking house on the same fucking night oh my fucking god
Ancestors: What Types there are and How to work with them

Introduction:

What is Ancestral Veneration

Ancestral Veneration is one of the most ancient religious and spiritual practices.  The respect and belief in an afterlife as well as honoring ancestors can be traced back to paleolithic mankind.   It is believed that honoring our ancestors was the first religious and spiritual form of ritual work.  From ways the dead were buried to views of the afterlife ancestors and the dead were never far from the mind of our paleolithic ancestors, and for some this truth remains today.

Ancestral veneration is not worshiping our ancestors, at least not in the common sense of worship. Ancestral veneration is more like honoring the dead in a respectful way.  Its a belief that they are still with us in a spirit form.  That they can hear us and can effect our lives from the other side.  Its a belief that our ancestors like other spirits can help us become the best person we can be and to live the life that we really want and desire.

There are exchanges of offerings and gifts.  This isn’t worship.  In some ways I think of it like when I put a flower on my ancestors grave.  Its giving something to them to signify that you remember them and care for them.  These gifts can be basically anything.  Though some cultures do have rules against some items being given to different spirits.
In some cultures flowers are only for the dead and it’s ok to leave offerings to the dead till they rot as this signifies they have taken everything.  In other cultures and practices only water is offered to the dead.   Even Christianity has mention of the value of prayer for the dead.  Working with and honoring our ancestors is a powerful spiritual path and there are many ways to go about it.

The act of the gift and the offering is the important thing though.  Its through these exchanges that relationships with our ancestors can develop and grow.  Its believed that a gift will ensure a gift.  Its also believed that because the dead and our ancestors are beyond the veil they have access to energy and powers of the universe that we don’t so by asking them to help us in our work and our lives they can tap into those energies for us.  Granted they dont help us unless we help ourselves.  So the gifts symbolize our part to do our work.

Many religions and traditions have celebrations and days of the dead.  Halloween, All saints and All Souls day,  Samhain, Dia de los Muertos(Mexican Day of the dead), The Bon Festival (Japan), and Pitru Paksha (Fortnight of the Ancestors-Hindu) are different festivals in different cultures.  They have one thing in common.  They are all festivals to honor the dead and the ancestors.  These are only a handful of celebrations that exist to celebrate ancestors and the dead.  The point is that the concept of honoring the dead is still alive and well in this world today.

The practice of honoring the dead is starting to become more common in Pagan practices today as well.  Part of that is that many of us are reclaiming this practice.  It was a part of ancient pagan traditions, so the practice was largely destroyed in the west.  For many reclaiming ancestral veneration as a part of our practice not only connects us to our more recent ancestors and keeps our passed loved ones in our lives, but it also allows us to reach the deepest ancestors we have which can be powerful guides for those starting down pagan paths.

Personal Development of Ancestor work

One of the reasons I am writing this post today is in honor of a new ancestor.  A loved one of mine has just crossed the veil.  It is this passing that has once again made me think about working with my ancestors and how is really always been a central part of my practice.  I haven’t always considered the contact with my ancestors and the shrines to my past loved ones ancestral veneration.  I thought it was simply remembering them and keeping them alive.

Ancestor veneration is a large part of my practice and spiritual work.  My ancestors have a lot to teach me.   I have an ancestor altar that I pray at everyday. While it is a strong part of my practice these days, ancestral veneration and honoring has not always been a large part of my path.  In fact it was at one point something I really only did on the festival of the dead (Samhain) as that was the focus.  I thought that was really all that was needed, and at the time maybe that was for my best.

When I started to practice witchcraft I had recently lost my Grandmother.  Many of the psychics and readings I had done at the time confirmed that she was staying close to me as a spirit guide (I was having dreams of her). So I started working with my ancestors through a single ancestor as a spirit guide.  That was 17 years ago.  Now I have an altar to all my ancestors as I have learned that any of our ancestors can be our guides and guardians.

Originally I didn’t offer any prayers, or much to my ancestors.  I would simply say hello to them when I needed to feel their presence.  I had a place of memory for them where I could see them and keep them in my life.  Then when I started to explore traditional witchcraft as a religious and spiritual practice I heard of the concept of giving them offerings and having shrines and altars to them.  So I created one and started an ancestral prayer working.

The practice with ancestral veneration got even deeper when I started to explore Germanic paganism and found I had Germanic ancestry.  When I read how they honored their ancestors and the powers of wyrd and Oorlog I decided that I had to develop my relationship even further.  So I started to work them into Germanic rites and rituals through the phrases “The Alfar and the Disir”

There was a time when I stopped practicing basically everything.  Then I started to explore Hoodoo.  My interest and desires to understand magic and witchcraft returned.  Through this I found more focus on ancestors and honoring your culture.  I found that ancestors will be powerful allies in spells as well as in meditations and trance work.  So through Hoodoo my work with my ancestors started to develop further and I learned new prayers to use for my ancestors.

Now today I have a prayer I say to them every morning and I have a prayer I say every evening to my ancestors.  I give them offerings when I perform rituals and I invite them into my ritual circles.  They have a part of my day to day life and my spiritual life. I couldn’t imagine my spiritual work without my ancestors at all.  They are always there for me and they always will be.  I may not be able to physically hold them and see them, but when I need them I can feel them and I know they are always there for me.

The types of ancestors:

Being adopted my ancestors actually come in different forms and types.  Not all of my ancestors are of the blood.  Some are of the spirit and some are of the heart.  I have legal blood ancestors and blood ancestors.  I have ancestors in all of my families that I don’t know but are my allies through the bonds of the heart and the spirit.  I even have ancestors that are not really in my family at all but are in my spiritual family. All of these ancestors have roles to play in my life and I honor them all.

I dont consider ancestors limited to just the blood and the heart though.This post is going to discuss the different ancestors I have through my adoption and my spiritual practices and how I can honor and work with each of them.  For the longest time I didn’t engage in ancestral veneration because of my adoption.  I wasn’t sure if I should honor my ancestors of my adoption, my foster family, or my biological family.  Thinking about this also was painful so while I wanted to honor my ancestors I didn’t go about it until I had answered my confusion.

How I came to see the types of Ancestors

That was how I came to see the different ancestral lines.  One year I went to the local Pagan Pride day.  I typically attend a few of the workshops that go on.  This year there was one about ancestral work and contacting your ancestors.  The key component of that workshop was a meditation on ancestral lines.  During this meditation I saw three lines of ancestral blood flowing from my body.  There was a fourth that was some what gray at the time and today its now clear.

It was then I knew that I was to honor all of my ancestors.  Those of my foster family, my blood or biological family, and my adoptive family.  It was through this work that I came to see that there are many different types of ancestors and that not everyone will have access to blood ancestors.  Through these meditations and concepts I came to see that there are
four primary types of ancestral allies: You have your ancestors of the Blood, your ancestors of the heart, and the ancestors of the spirit.  Adoptive ancestors are actually a mixture of two types which I will get into in the next sections as well as being their own type of ancestor.

Ancestors of The Blood

Every one is familiar with the concept of blood ancestors.  These are those of your family or blood line that goes back generations.  These are the strongest allies that one can have.  These are the ancestors that everyone thinks about when they think of ancestors.  Ancestors of the blood also include ancestors gained through marriage and long term committed relationships.  When I got engaged to my fiance his ancestors joined mine and mine his.  We are a family unit.  These ancestors go back generations on each side.  So the lines of blood ancestors are very long.

These are the strongest allies that you can have as a spirit.  They are the ones that have your best interest at heart.   Through the strands of Fate, and the workings of Wyrd we are always directly connected to our ancestors.  Our actions reflect them as much as their actions reflect on us.  So we need to honor them in our lives and we need to keep them close to us.  Before any other spirit is petitioned the ancestors will work stronger for you and faster for you. There is little that is stronger than the power of the blood.

Adoptive Ancestors

For me I also have my adoptive ancestors,  These are the ancestors of my adoptive family.  They are the family that raised me and that belongs to me.  In ancient cultures at times the roles of the blood ancestors would be replaced by the foster and or adoptive family.  In my case I never considered them to replace the blood ancestors at all.  I considered them additional ancestors that I was blessed to have.

We have no physical blood that ties us.  However to all of the world and all legal meanings they are my flesh and blood.  That is how I feel about them as well.  In all honesty at times they are more my family than my blood and biological family simply because I have minimal contact and my relationship with that family is in its infancy (until recently was non existent).  Which is why they are both ancestors of the blood and of the heart.  The time that they spent raising me and being involved in my life can not be undone.

They gave their blood, sweat, and tears to me.  They are for my my most powerful allies.  They have been there for me more than the blood ancestors.  They were the first ancestors I have contacted and they were the first ones to make themselves known to me.  This is the ancestral line that has been the strongest for me.  My blood ancestral work is focused on more ancient pagan ancestor while my adoptive ancestral work is more with Saint and angel work (Hoodoo influences as well).

It is because my adoptive Ancestors gave so much of their blood, sweat, and tears into my life and that they took me in they are also ancestors of the heart.  They are of the blood because of the family ties and concepts but of the heart because there is no physical blood.  Its a spiritual and memory based blood love.  The bond of the heart here shows how even just being in a family for a short while can create strong family bonds.

Ancestors of the Heart

Those of the heart are the family that has passed that are not connected through marriage or blood or even legal adoption.  In my case this is where my foster family lies.  They did not adopt me but are still my family.  I have lost several members of that family and they were all close to me.  They are now my ancestors and they watch over me.  Our bond is somewhat stronger than blood or law.

These ancestors are some of my more recent ancestors.  It was my Uncle Cleve’s passing which made me think about ancestors.  He was my foster uncle and is an ancestor of my heart.  His two brothers are also my ancestors here.  I have a Grandfather here as well.  To them and to me the fact that I did not live with them, and was not legally a part of the family after my adoption never mattered.  I never stopped being their family.  That is what the ancestors of the heart are all about.

The ancestors of the heart are those that have passed on we considered family even if there was no blood between you.  These can be friends you thought of as brothers and sisters, close friends and even those who you would consider “father"or "mother” figures.  If you feel that they were and are apart of your family in your heart than they are your family and are your ancestors.  Never let anyone else tell you any different.

Ancestors of the Spirit:

Finally there are ancestors of the spirit. For me I consider any Occultist, Witch, and Magician who worked hard to preserve the magical and spiritual arts are my spiritual ancestors.  Even though I dont agree with all of their teachings and philosophies people like Gerald Gardner, Aliester Crowley, Doreen Valiente, Scott Cunningham, and many others put a lot of work into making magical spirituality acceptable and part of our day to day lives again.  Those are a few of my spiritual ancestors as a witch based on the practices I have taken into my practice.

As I explore Hoodoo and other magical systems other spiritual ancestors will come into my practice.  For example Marie Laveau is a famous Hoodoo worker in New Orleans.  In some respects I could consider her a spiritual ancestor.  Other ancestors in the case of Hoodoo would in general be any one who struggled to keep African American spiritual heritage alive through Hoodoo and Rootwork.  When a teacher passes I would add them to the spiritual ancestors as well.

You can also have ancestors of the spirit when you are spiritually adopted into a tradition.  There are many religions and paths where they are only open to people of a specific culture.  Occasionally through the practice of spiritual adoption outsiders are initiated and welcome into that spiritual family.  The ancestors of your initiator in these situations become your ancestors and guides as well.  It is a spiritual family you have entered into and like all families they will help you and work with you if you honor them as taught.


Working with your ancestors

Now that we have covered the types of ancestors out there and I have mentioned the importance of working with your ancestors its time to actually start thinking about how we can work with them.  Why do we work with them, and what the best ways of working with them are.

There are two primary ways aside from meditation and spirit travel work that a person can work with their ancestors.  These two forms are the altar and prayers.  They work well together and serve as a starting point for building power with your ancestral allies.  Unless one is experienced in astral travel and spirit communication using those tools right away to work with your ancestors is not the best of ideas.  Prayers and altar work are all you really need.

The altar

Really when it comes to working with your ancestors the only real must do I have found is having an altar of some sort where you can offer prayers and other items to them as you get to know them.  These altars can evolve and change over time. The point of the altar is to serve as a focal point in your work.  The altar is a place for you to offer your prayers and your gifts to them.

Your altar doesn’t need to be fancy.  Many people start off not knowing any of their ancestors. In which case a candle, a cup for water, and a plate for offerings is all you would need to contact them.  If you know your passed on loved ones and you have photos of them you can and should add those photos to the altar.

The altar also serves as a place of remembrance of the dead.  So its a place to put items that make you think of your ancestors as well as their photos.  You want it to look nice and appealing.  This is going to be their home for you in your house and their place in your life.  So its also important to keep the altar neat looking.

There are no limits on your ancestral altar.  Let their spirits come through.  There are reasons for the symbols I have placed on my altars.  They grew as my focus and my relationships grew.  One thing has always been common though-the focus has been on remembering them and keeping their memories alive in my life.


Ancestral Prayers

The best way to work with your ancestors even before starting an altar is simply to pray to them.  Prayers to your ancestors aren’t really any different than prayers for gods and spirit guides.  You are simply having a conversation with your ancestors.  Prayers are how we can communicate with them directly and its our best way to communicate with them.  They can communicate with us in different ways (dreams, scents, meditations, sudden insights etc) but we can really only speak to them through prayers.

The easiest prayer is simply:
“Blessed Ancestors I welcome you into my life.  May you bless and guide me and may you teach me what you yourself can”

That’s all your prayers to your ancestors need to be.  You dont need to praise them.  You don’t need to have a fancy invocation.  You simply can address them as your ancestors and they will listen to you.  You dont even really need to ask for a blessing.  You could simply say something along the lines of:
“Good Morning Ancestors.  I welcome you this day”.

All you are doing with your prayers is acknowledging that they exist and that they are apart of your world.  By giving them a simple welcome everyday you will start to feel their presence build up.  You will begin to know them and feel them like you do can with other spirits and beings that you work with.  The more attention you give them the more you will notice them.

Prayers can be more complex and verbose.  My personal prayers evolved from a simple Hello and welcome to a full blessing and daily petition for them to be here.  There is a bit of praise and there is a bit of thanks.  These prayers are offered twice daily.  I feel that they flowed from me into the written form when I was channeling spirits and writing prayers for them.  My ancestors let me know what they wanted.

Offerings and Gifts

The final way that we can work with our ancestors is in offerings and gifts.  These gifts are ways that we say thank you and show our appreciation to them.  There are many ways types of gifts that can be given to our ancestors.   You can give your ancestor basically anything you would give yourself or a person.  They are still family and they are still people.

For myself I consider flowers on graves a gift to them.  I also place flowers on the altars every so often as remembrances of them.  I try and give them their favorite flowers.  I also try and give them their favorite things.  For my grandmother I will think of her when I go bowling and send her some of that energy as play and a memory of our times together.

On holidays I will set aside a portion of the food on my plate for my ancestors.  I will let it sit till the end and eat that last.  They eat the essence of that portion while I eat my meal.  When I have finished the portion for me they will have had their fill and I can take nourishment from the food.  Other cultures burn food offerings to ancestors and spirits.  Some burry the food in the yard.   Other throw it into the woods for animals to eat.

There are some taboos in various cultures about what can and can’t be given to ancestors and the dead.  If you belong to a specific culture, religion, and or tradition I suggest that you look into ways that they honor the dead.  By honoring the traditions of your culture, your religion and your tradition you are honoring your ancestors in that way as well.   These traditions after all were ancestral in many cases.

Conclusion:

This post has covered my own discovery into the importance of ancestral veneration.  It has covered the types of ancestors and a few of the ways that we can work with our ancestors.  Your ancestors are part of who you are.  They are powerful allies that can teach you things you wouldn’t imagine and who can be there for you in ways none else can.   Your ancestors are still here in this life and in this world just in a different form.

There are many ways to work with them.  Once you start working with them you will find that there are many more ways and reasons to work with them.  I’ve been working with my ancestors actively for several years and my relationships with them continue to grow and develop.  I am constantly learning new reasons to honor them and new ways of working with them.  The more I learn the more I realize there is to learn.

These allies seem to be the ones that develop the most as I develop spiritually.  The more I understand spiritual and magical practices the stronger they seem to become and the more things we seem to be able to so together.  Its my hope that any one who has read this will start to develop their own relationships with their ancestors and start to find the power and comfort in ancestral grace and guidance.

“I have lost many people; For far too many reasons; I have seen, I have lived, I have learned.

I have changed my way of being because I didn’t like it; Or just because…

I have hated pink; And dressed myself in black just because…

I have loved pink; And dressed myself in flower print, just because…

I talk to no one; But then I suddenly talk to everybody.

I hate being with too many people; But then I hate being by myself.

I hate the sky because of the many souls that might live above it;
But I find myself lost in it’s beauty.

I hate the Earth for having so many bad people on it. But then, I fall in love with every soul I get the chance to meet.

I, as many, believe that every soul has a story. Some have more than one.

I myself, have quite a one…

Don’t expect me talk about it all…
But I have scars that hold many secrets, each one has a reason, each one has a story to be told….

Sometimes I’d like to forget, but, how can I?

Those are stories that have made me the girl I am today…

Sometime I might tell. Maybe I wont…

But the saddest and most important part of my story; Most important part of it all….

I have fallen madly in love… 2 times!

And life has betrayed me…

One is up above in Heaven; And the other one, is walking somewhere on Earth…

I have loved both;
I have holded both.
But I have lost both..

I had it all.
But now I got non..

I got a reason to hate life;
But, how can I?….

Sadly….

Life is beautiful….

And I love my story, with all and it’s burned pages

—  Na.Ro.Ap

This morning, we were awoken by evacuation sirens going off in town, and emergency alerts on our phone at 6 in the morning informing us about the missile that North Korea had launched. At first I thought it was just another emergency alert about a flood or an earthquake so I didn’t read through it completely until half asleep me started to register that the message said “missile fired. I repeat. missile fired. Evacuate to an underground level” I began to receive a handful of messages from my friends in Tokyo and other parts of Japan as well.

Today we were very fortunate that the missile dissembled into three parts and landed into the ocean. For the first time I genuinely felt scared. I hope my fellow friends and those shaken up further North and in Hokkaido are doing okay.

The scariest part was knowing the missile was launched unwarned. And it only took a span of 12 minutes from the time it was launched to when it has landed. Pretty much in a blink of an eye and there was not much time to evacuate to be honest so I just stayed in bed hoping for the best.

Before I moved to Japan, or took this job in Japan, my mom was a bit wary about me wanting to move to Japan because of its political climate with North Korea. I didn’t really take the issue as seriously, and even after living here I hadn’t taken it to heart because the first time the missile also landed in the ocean and I didn’t get any warnings on my phone. But situations like today made everything feel so much more real…

I went to work as usual today, and the energy in the room just felt odd. Everyone was talking about how scary this morning was, and many of my coworkers were laughing about them waking up injured or dead, and it really put our situation in perspective. I don’t know what could have happened if the missile landed on our land, but I very much could have died today. Today reminded me that I should spend time reflecting on my life, my purpose for living on this earth, as well as dying because we never know when something like this could take our life. In general, we just don’t know how long or short our life will be. If anything stuck with me today it’s my mom’s words:

「人間は何のために生まれてきたのかを真剣に考えていく必要がある。」

I’m just so happy to be alive.

To whom it may concern:

(I know it looks long, but just read it okay?)
Today, I felt terrible. I felt like I wasn’t good enough. Like everyone who smiled at me was lying. lies, lies lies. Everywhere.
It was pretty hot out today, so instead of wearing a sweater, I wore 3 million bracelets to cover my self harm scars. Everybody. And I mean EVERYBODY I EVEN ran into made fun of them. Even my “friends.” My good friend Amanda:
“Haha what’s with all the bracelets?”
My friend Olivia:
“2012 called, they want their style back.”
My friend Nadyia:
“Why are you wearing all those bracelets ?”
I couldn’t tell you how many comments I got about my “2012 fashion”
It’s not my choice.
I HAVE to wear these.
All day I was tired. I was depressed again. I was yelled at by my “friends.” Yelled at by my teachers.
I got home and I was tired. I was achy and I wanted everything to just end.
I wanted the pain to stop.
Everyday this happens and I was tired of it.
But then, a notification.
“YuB uploaded a video: DON’T BEA MEAN! (Night in the woods playthrough.”
I had been waiting to watch some night in the woods.
So I watched it. I checked Dan and phil’s channel and watched some of their old videos. Next thing I new, another notification.
“StacyPlays uploaded a video: CAMOUFLAGE (Mystic Mesa)”
I watched that. By that time, about an hour had passed. A whole hour without thinking of hurting myself. I then finished watching Jackfilms’s hour long:
“Frame by frame review of the emoji movie trailer”
Of corse the video was a joke, so that was a whole ‘nother hour of laughing.
2 hours. 2 hours of not thinking about suicide. 2 hours of laughing.
Then, I watched a new game theory I’ve been meaning to watch.
Then, the “little nightmares” livestream from CrankGameplays.
Then, Markiplier TV bloopers
Then I re watched the “no more mama” musical from random encounters.
And, I didn’t feel depressed anymore. Basically, this is a PSA

YouTubers help depression
YouTube is a real job
And it’s an important one too.
YouTube saved me
From my wicked thoughts

Thank you….
@danielhowell @amazingphil @markiplier @therealjacksepticeye @crankgameplays @randomencounters7

"How Was Your Day?"

Today was ordinary. Nobody died on my watch. People underrate what a blessing ordinary can be. I’ll take it. I’ll take that any day.

Today I briefly held the hand of a patient who will never know my name. But I will forever remember theirs, and the moments leading up to their death.

Today I took care of a patient who gave birth this morning, went unresponsive during labor and is now on life support. She hasn’t even seen her baby yet.

Today I witnessed my first cardiac arrest of my own patient while I was turning him. They say you’ll never feel prepared, no matter how many you see during orientation, or help other nurses with - it’s accurate; nothing prepares you for that first moment of panic when you realize what’s happening. When you realize it’s happening to a patient you’re responsible for.

Today I made a stupid, stupid mistake. Today I made a mistake that could have harmed my patient. There isn’t any consolation for that.

Today I took care of a an elderly man who lived at home and had clear evidence of elder abuse. I don’t know what broke my heart more - the family’s response that he was a nuisance, or the thought of how long he had to endure this.

Today I read to my blind patient. She doesn’t have friends or family who visit, and she lives in a nursing home. Hospital administrators will say they’re not paying me to sit on my ass and read, but at the end of this monotonous and factory nurse-like day; it’s the one simple thing I don’t feel a failure at today.

Today I wrapped my first patient in a shroud.

Today I wrapped what is likely my hundredth patient in a shroud. It never gets easier, and we just stop telling people about it who assume it does.

Today I had a terrible argument with a doctor. He humiliated my practice in front of a patient. He humiliated the practice of what nurses do. In front of a patient who was already frightened and mistrustful of being in a hospital.

Today I listened as a patient got devastating news about a diagnosis they didn’t see coming. I did see it coming; nevertheless, I am just as devastated.

Today I looked a bully in the eye and told them simply…I am learning. It wasn’t a large victory on the outside, and one I can’t share for it sounds weak to the always strong.

Today I was behind on my meds, chasing labs, paging doctors incessantly, and realized I didn’t have a sip of water all day.

Today I feel as though I am simply doing the best I can. And that’s enough.

Today I raced a marathon of care - and at the end I asked myself did I make a difference at all?

Today I feel my heart burning out. Tomorrow I will try again.


“How was your day?”
“…My day was fine.”

When my roommate was Taken and Replaced, there were a lot of things I was prepared for (things like sleeping with iron on, keeping salt under my pillow, constantly being on guard, and never taking food from her), but explaining memes to her was not one.

I was in our room studying, just trying to cram for one of the classes we have an excess of tests in, when Not Vex looked right at me and asked, “Why are so many people talking about the friends we made along the way? It doesn’t even make any sense. Today at lunch, Binks said ‘maybe the real final exam was the friends we made along the way’ while we were studying. It just-it makes no sense.”

It took me longer than was probably polite to answer, because how the hell are you supposed to answer when one of Them asks why a meme exists? I did have to answer eventually, though.

“It’s called a meme. It’s things that start on the internet that people find funny, and they usually don’t make sense, and they start getting used in different ways. The one you were talking about started to make fun of something that’s in a lot of movies, where they search for treasure or a prize or something and don’t find it, and someone says something about the real prize being the friends they made along the way. People love making fun of overdone tropes, so it got really big and now people use it in a lot of ways and some of them make no sense, like the one Binks used,” I told Not Vex, hoping my explanation was enough and I could get back to my studying.

She seemed satisfied, and I thought that was the end of it.

If only I could be so lucky.

Now, anytime there’s a new one, she’ll make it a point to tap me on the shoulder and ask “Is that one of those meme things you told me about?”

Vex was never very quiet, and Not Vex isn’t either. Now everyone knows I am on good enough terms with Them to talk to my Gentry roommate about memes and I have no idea what to do with that kind of power.

[x]

❝ I love you too, Jungkook. ❞

Plot: You’re an idol and you’re dating Jungkook. You show up at one of his fan sign and he says to everyone that you two are dating. 

Pairing: JungkookxReader 

Words count: 1,8k+

Genre: Fluff 

For anon, I hope you like it cutie! - M. 

Gif isn’t mine, credits to the owner! ♥

Deciding to go meet your boyfriend during a fan sign didn’t seem to be any more a great idea as at the beginning. The black mask covered your face and fortunately your eyes didn’t reveal much of who you were. Yet the feeling of being perpetually observed didn’t seem to disappear and so the anxiety increased to every minute that passed.  

But you haven’t seen Jungkook for weeks, and if that was the only way to change the situation, you’d be well-born to be discovered.  

“Next time I’ll close you in our room.” Your best friend muttered, as well as the leader of your group and the worst advocate in the world; making you smile amused from underneath the mask.  

“I didn’t ask you to come.. Then we repeated several times that we’re their fans, even if they discovered there I know hey couldn’t see anything strange… ”  

“YOU KNOW? I swear that if I read another article where they ship me and Taehyung I shoot myself. ”  

“What a bad thing Unnie…. In short, Taehyung is an incredible guy. ” You whispered in response, not understanding all that boredom towards that sweet and a little crazy boy. “Then he is also extremely beaut–”  

“But think of your boy!”  

“You Like him! That’s why you’re bored by the articles…. because you’re ashamed to talk to him. ”  

The slap that came soon after on your shoulder only made you entertain more, while patiently expected your turn to go to get the album signed.  

He was as beautiful as always but he seemed particularly cheerful that day, he could even not to bully his hyung and his smile could make you completely melt. It’s been seven months since you started to date and you’ve already figured out you were falling in love with him, but you were too intimidated and scared to confess your feelings. It was your first serious “relationship”, although not yet effective because he didn’t really ask you to be his girlfriend and you were both so young that you were afraid that he could run away in front of your confession.  

“Jungkook-oppa!” “Jungkook, you are beautiful!” “Jungkook I love you!”  

Keep reading

Liam Dunbar Imagine- Nervous

Anon- Hello love! Don’t know if you’re taking requests but I really loved your last Liam imagine so I was wondering if you could please write a Liam imagine where he once saved the reader who is a werewolf too, so she starts being protective with him and then he’s starts to act weird in front of her because he likes her. like, she wonders why his heart raises when she’s around, thanks! 

Author’s Note- Hope you enjoy. You can find some of my other imagines here x

One Week Ago

“Y/n move!” Liam shouted, after noticing Tracy was coming up from behind you. You didn’t hear in time. You turned around and felt sharp claws penetrate your side, making your eyes glow bright gold. You fell to the ground paralysed after the Kanima venom worked its way into your bloodstream. You couldn't do anything but stare above you, seeing Tracy’s face as she towered above you, her hand stretched ready to make her final move. You then saw as a figure pushed her to the ground with an animalistic growl, after hearing more cuts, punches and tables being broken, you felt someone lift you up to carry you bridal style. He tilted your head up so you could see him. You smiled weakly and let out a sigh of relief, with the limited movement in your neck you put your head into his chest and slowly let your eyes close, knowing you’d soon be fine. Thank god for Liam Dunbar.

Currently

Liam picked up a tray and examined the food options in the dinner queue. “Move Dunbar” one of his team mates said playfully, pushing in front of him. “Come on dude, that’s the third time this week” Liam complained like a kid. “Fuck you” you said picking up a tray and positing yourself next to Liam. “It’s only a joke, tell your girl to chill” his team mate brushed off, shaking his head. “She’s not my-” Liam began to explain awkwardly, before you interrupted. “Apologise and go to the back of the queue before I shove this tray so far up your arse that you start seeing-” you began to threaten, until Liam covered your mouth with his hand. “Okay man chill, I’m sorry and I’ll see you at practice” he said as he backed away, slightly scared. You simply turned away and began to look at the food, as if nothing had happened. “What was that?” he asked, with a grin on his face. “He was treating you as inferior, to which I disagree” you stated, pouting at the sight of the dreadful food your school was serving. “Y/n” he said, trying not to laugh. “Huh?” your cheeks began to flush, at the thought of you having something on your face or something in your hair to make him laugh at you. “You do realise, you just also pushed in the queue” he said, looking at all the students that were complaining to one another. “Oh right” you realised, looking a bit hypocritical. “I’m just going to go” you began to back away before he quickly grabbed your wrist before you could. You both couldn’t help but listen as both of your heart beats slowed down to the same rate and beat loudly for a split second. He assumed that yours was purely because he shocked you, you on the other hand was confused as to why his did too. You looked as him quizzically, before he quickly let go with a really anxious look on his face. “Oh erm sorry, I was just going to say you may as well stay now, we’re almost at the front” he mumbled. “Oh okay, I guess so” you shrugged. Neither of you spoke another word while In the queue together and you barely talked while at the lunch table, which caused a few quizzical looks among the pack. I guess both of you were too busy over analysing what had just happened.

Later on, you all met up at Scott’s house for your weekly pack meeting. Liam had made an excuse not to walk with you like you usually did, he instead had already arranged for Stiles to come and pick you up. “Hey” Stiles beamed as you got into the front seat of his jeep. “Heyy” you retuned the energy. “Let’s roll out” he said, putting it into reverse. “How many coffees have you had?” you asked with wide eyes, looking down to see all the empty Starbucks cups scattered around. “Today? Only like three” he shrugged, speaking a little too quick. “I better not die in this piece of scrap metal” you whined. “Never insult Roscoe like that!” he said pointing at you, while still looking at the road. “And you’ve named it” you laughed. “Don’t listen to her, I love you just the way you are” he claimed, kissing his steering wheel as you pulled up at Scott’s. When you arrived, everyone else was already there and waiting for the pair of you. You sat next to Liam, once again hearing his heart beat out of his chest. You turned to look at him with furrowed brows but he stared straight ahead of him and Scott began to speak before you could say anything about his shady behaviour. There wasn’t long left of the meeting thankfully, it was one of the most awkward things you’d experienced when there was no need for it to be. Liam’s heart would randomly race whenever yours and his shoulders brushed or every time he felt you look at him. Normally he would make groans when he got bored but he sat there like a statue the whole time. With about ten minutes left Stiles got a call from his dad and he had to leave early, so unfortunately for Liam, that meant walking home with you, considering you lived literally a few houses away from one another it seemed only rational.

“Liam will you slow down?” you whined, walking ten steps behind him. “You’re a werewolf now Y/n, you cant use the ‘I’m not into sport’ excuse anymore” he called back to you, referring to how lazy you used to be before you received the bite. He stopped suddenly, after he could no longer hear the noise of you walking and sighing loudly. He turned around to see you were no longer there and feeling scared was an understatement, he swiftly turned back around to look for you and practically screamed when he saw you in front of him. “Wow Liam, who knew you had lungs like that” you teased jokingly. “It’s not funny, I thought you were kidnapped” he breathed half in relief, half in annoyance. “I’m a werewolf, remember?” you said, your eyes then widened at the sight of a flashing neon sign. You skipped merely and opened the doors into the diner. That was a thing you loved about small towns, the old school diners with good and cheap food. Liam groaned but hesitantly followed behind you. You sat in your usual booth and he sat opposite you with a grumpy expression. “What are we doing here?” he asked, crossing his arms. “I’m hungry” you said innocently. He looked relieved for a second, until you continued. “And also to find out why you’re avoiding me” you also crossed your arms. “Usual?” the waitress asked, while Liam sunk into his chair. “Yes please” you smiled. She then looked over at him. “Just a coke please” he mumbled. She looked surprised, normally Liam ordered half of the menu but she simply nod and walked off to the kitchen. “You’re being weird, tell me what’s up” you said straight forwardly after a few minutes of watching him pretend to read the menu he was holding, that was upside down. “I’m not being weird” he scoffed, looking anywhere but at you. “I know when you’re lying” you claimed, leaning forward. His eyes flickered for a minute, while he raised his hand to bite his fingernails. “Why are you doing that?” you asked with a slight look of disgust. “Nervous” he replied simply. “There’s no reason for you to be nervous” you said, focusing on the food that the waitress placed in front of you. “There is when you’re trying to tell your best friend you’re in love with her” he accidently blurted out. Your eyes widened in shock as you quickly looked from your plate to him. The waitress awkwardly backed away after hearing that, trying to supress the smile on her face. “Oh god” he suddenly said in horror, realising what he just said. You sat there with your mouth parted open looking at him. “It just slipped out” he added, rubbing the back of his neck. “Please say something” he squeaked, after you didn’t reply. “You love me” you simply repeated. “As a friend-” he tried to lie, “As more than a friend” he admitted straight after. “I-I-” you began to stutter. Liam waited in anticipation for your response, not sure if he had just made the biggest mistake of his life. “I cant do this right now” you said, picking up your bag and exiting the diner in a matter of seconds. He sat there, his head in his hands in the booth that was once his safe place. Your safe place.

“Y/n you fucking idiot” you said out loud to yourself in your bedroom. You had been pacing back and forth for like half an hour. “Why didn’t you tell him that you feel the same” you complained. “Oh god” you sighed in frustration, running your hands through your hair. You heard your phone buzz from on your bed, you picked it up to see a message from Liam; ‘I’m sorry, just forget I said anything. I didn’t want to ruin us’. You exhaled and gave a brief thought. “Fuck this” you said, locking your phone, shoving it into your jean pocket and grabbing your coat from the back of your door. You didn’t slowly approach the situation like any normal human being would, in fact you stormed from your house back to the diner impulsively. You knew he would still be there, you saw him through the window, clouded with condensation. His head was on the table and it was practically empty in there. You burst into the doors and walked over to your booth, it didn’t take long for him to recognise the smell of your perfume or the sound of your heartbeat. He lifted himself up, but before either of you could say anything, you scooted to sit beside him and pressed your lips to his harshly but longingly. He was surprised at first, to say the least but he soon opened up and deepened the kiss. The only reason you pulled away from one another was to catch your breath. You stared at each other, examining every detail. “I owe you ten bucks” the chef whispered to the waitress. Both of your werewolf hearings picked up on that from across the room. “I told you, they were meant to be together from the first time they came here” the waitress smiled reminiscently. You and Liam smiled upon hearing that. “I guess this means you like me back?” he asked. “I don’t like you- I love you” you corrected, putting your head on your shoulder as he wrapped his arm around you. He stroked your hair and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. “I’m hungry” you claimed. “Yeah me too” he agreed. You both glanced over to the waitress and chef. “Its on the house” they spoke at the same time, accidently giving away that they were listening to your conversation. Y/F/N and Liam Dunbar, who’d have thought you’d ever be more than best friends? Well everyone apart from the pair of you, but regardless the feelings you had for him were mutual. That was the day you realised you’d already found your soulmate and everything else stemmed from there.

Requests are closed ATM sorry, I have too many and so I wont be doing any that are sent as I have too many that I’m currently working on. I’ll let you know when they’re open x

5

Fifteen years ago today, I saw Spirited Away for the first time. It made an indescribably huge impact on me and has been an important part of my life ever since - I have lost count of how many times I’ve watched it, or how many hours I’ve spent thinking about it.

This is my tribute to a story that that gave eight-year old me courage to grow and a deep sense of wonder towards the world that’s still with me to this day.

While getting ready for work today, I have been thinking about people that made an impact on my life. There really isn’t a way to explain or verbalize the feelings. How grateful I am for them. Especially my cousin who passed many years ago. He was a perfect example of love and friendship.

Seasons of Love

https://youtu.be/Nth4oHhSFew

i know im not alone when i say i was brought to tears today seeing how Liam is treated by the fandom at large. The mockery, disrespect and downright nasty comments being made and the actions of a few people have ruined what should have been a happy occasion for us liam stans. i know many people will read this and roll their eyes and say its not that deep, but seeing Liam shit on by every corner of the fandom is hard to endure. I’m not saying you have to like Liam I’m not saying you have to like the song all I’m asking is that you treat Liam with the respect he deserves.  

Of Chibis and Usas

Summary: Leave it to Adrien to discover a little lost Chibi Usa at a convention- especially whilst dressed as Tuxedo Mask. 

~

If he hadn’t gotten lost, he might never have heard it.

As Adrien, fully clad in his Tuxedo Mask cosplay, rounded what must have been the eighteenth corner of the labyrinth masquerading as a convention centre, his ear pricked. At first the sound was so faint that he almost dismissed it, but he chose to follow his gut instead.

He was glad he did as, when he followed the sound, his instincts were proven correct.

In a tiny, obviously forgotten corner, far away from the crowds, was a girl so tiny that Adrien’s heart instantly shattered at the look of her. She was curled up into ball. Tucked as tight as she could, her wide eyes searching and frantic, her cheeks red and stained with tears and her pink wig askew, it was only when he took a better look that he realised who she was cosplaying.

Glancing around, Adrien felt at a loss when he realised he was the only person in the nearby vicinity, having strayed out of the main convention hall in order to find a bathroom and gotten lost on the way back.

“H-hi,” he tried, keeping his voice gentle. Making sure to keep his distance, in case he scared her, Adrien crouched down and faced the crying girl, who whimpered and buried her face into her lap as he approached. Adrien froze, not moving any further. “It’s alright. I won’t hurt you. Did you lose your mum or dad?”

The girl cried harder, but tilted her head back up to face him, and nodded.

Frowning, Adrien pulled out his phone. He was alone, in a quiet corner of a convention hall, with a little girl in distress. He needed help as much as he needed to help the girl find who she was with.

“You’re Chibi Usa aren’t you?” he asked, smiling as kindly as he could. The girl nodded again, her bright blue eyes reminding her so much of Marinette’s that it caught him off guard for a moment. “Hello Chibi Usa, I’m Tuxedo Mask! I’m going to try and help you!”

As if it would help him further, he pulled a fabric rose out from his pocket and offered it to the girl, who was now a lot calmer. He’d been given them periodically to Marinette throughout the convention, but he doubted she’d miss one, especially for a good cause.

“I know who you are,” the girl replied in a wobbly voice, sniffing as she took the rose from Adrien’s gloved hand. “You’re my Papa.”

Adrien froze for a moment, his face draining, before the girl giggled. “I didn’t mean it real life you know, I meant in the anime! Tuxedo Mask is Chibi Usa’s papa! Everyone knows that… but… my papa,” she trailed off here, her sudden calm crumbling away as her face scrunched up. “My papa… I don’t know- he’s- where he is- I don’t-”

“Hey, hey, hey!” Adrien shushed, waving his hands, his top hat almost falling off at the vigorous gestures he was making. “It’s ok. You know I know the real Sailor Moon. I’m going to text her right now to ask her to help you. But can you tell me your name, and your papa’s name? It’ll help Sailor Moon save the day!”

Once Adrien had her name he typed two quick texts to Marinette, and hoped he had enough of a signal on his phone for them to deliver.

Adrien: Hey Sailor Moon! Tuxedo Mask is lost with Chibi Usa somewhere outside the main hall. We’re in a corner and we need you to come and get us. Love mew! XxXxXx

Adrien: Ok but furr-realsies, there’s a little girl here dressed as Chibi Usa who’s lost her Papa. Can you grab a security guard or something? I promised her we’d help and I don’t want to leave her alone <3

“Oh! Good! The messages sent!” Adrien chirped, grinning at Carolane and settling against the wall beside her. “All we have to do now is wait.”

“Will Sailor Moon really find my papa?” she asked, tilting her head up at him as she fixed her wig, nervously fiddling with the pigtails and generally looking nervous. At least she wasn’t as distraught as before.

As if the universe was smiling down on them both, Adrien’s phone pinged a split second after she asked. Looking at his phone, he grinned, quickly changing Marinette’s contact name before showing Carolane the screen. With widened eyes, the small girl leaned close, her face lighting up in awe when she saw the text Adrien showed her.

Sailor Moon: Tell her to leave it to me! In the name of the moon I shall find her father! XxXxXx <3

“OH MY GOSH! OH MY GOSH! I’m going to meet Sailor Moon! Sailor Moon is going to find my papa!!!!” she squealed, all traces of despair gone, and Adrien forced down a laugh. Really, it was entirely too cute.

Fifteen minutes later, what looked like half of Paris’ security guards, along with a frantic looking man whom Adrien assumed was Carolone’s father, appeared around the corner. Carolane shrieked. Leaping to her feet, she ran towards her father at full speed and threw herself into his open arms. Adrien’s heart warmed at the sight of the reunited pair, but he frowned when he realised Marinette was nowhere in sight.

“Miss me?”

The yelp he made was very un-Tuxedo-Mask-like but, when he spun around, Marinette was standing there- a picture of perfection in her Sailor Moon cosplay. Recovering quickly, he smirked, bowing low. “I always miss you when you’re gone, my love.”

With that he gave her another fabric rose, and she arched an eyebrow at him. “That’s the eighth rose you’ve given me today. How many more do you have hidden in that cape? Or are you hiding them in your top hat?”

“As many as you want, my lady,” he replied, kissing her hand. “And I’d never reveal where I’m hiding them! That’s a surprise.”

“He’d hiding them in the inside bits of his jacket!”

Adrien’s face froze, the smirk wiped clean, and Marinette giggled. Taking the hand he’d been kissing, she covered her face with it instead and Adrien’s heart leapt at the sound. Before he realised who’d given away his secret, Marinette crouched down beside him to face Carolane (that traitor). “So, you’re the lost Chibi Usa huh? Your costume is really cute!” Marinette cooed, giving Carolane a friendly wave.

“I can’t thank you enough for helping me find her young lady,” Carolane’s father said, shaking her hand with fervour. He was a young man, no older the thirty, and had the tense countenance of someone who’d recently gone through something traumatic. He turned to Adrien, shaking his hand too. “And thank you for finding her- when I think what could have happened…”

Adrien shook his head. “Don’t mention it. We were happy to help.”

Carolone was busy staring at Marinette with stars in her eyes. The girls face slowly turned beetroot red as she stammered a response. “Th- thank you Sailor Moon! You’re so cool in the show! Especially when you beat the bad guys!”

“The trick is to always be brave and never, ever give up hope!” Marinette replied with a flourish. Watching the conversation from afar, Adrien was sure he was about to die from cuteness overload. It was too much for him to handle.

“I promise I’ll never, ever, EVER give up hope!” Carolane said, clenching her fists and nodding, even as her stomach growled.

Her father laughed ruffling her wig. “We should probably get you something to eat. Would you two like something? On me?”

“Oh thank you Monsieur, but we have places to go, other people to save you know?” Adrien replied, winking at Carolane, who giggled.

“What he means,” Marinette interjected with a roll of her eyes, “is we’re entering the cosplay competition so we have to get there soon. But thank you anyway. It was a pleasure to help.”

After they’d all said their goodbyes, with Carolane promising to come and watch them in the cosplay competition (“How can you not win?! You’re the REAL DEAL!”) Adrien wrapped his arms around Marinette’s waist and puller her so that her back was against his chest. Resting his chin on her shoulder, he nuzzled in close, kissing her neck. “I want one of those. They’re so cute!”

“Are you planning on making one now?” Marinette scoffed as he continued kissing her neck. “Because I think they’d disqualify us from the cosplay contest… and we’d probably be banned from all future conventions.”

“Fate is so cruel,” Adrien sighed, spinning her around at bopping her on the nose. “But seriously, what do you think of having our own Chibi Usa one day?”

Marinette thought for a moment, scrunching her nose in an adorable way that made him unable to resist the urge to kiss it, and a few of her freckles, until she was laughing and lightly pushing him away.

“A Chibi Usa sounds nice,” she said, lacing her fingers with his, “but for now, I suggest we stick to Luna.”

“I HEARD THAT!” Plagg yelled, floating out of Adrien’s pocket with a grumble, a crescent moon sticker on his head. “And get this stupid thing off me!”

Adrien burst out laughing.

“You’re right,” he replied, ignoring Plagg cursing beside him. “Luna is more than enough for the time being.”

This is a spiritual successor to @sarahcada​‘s Of Tuxedos and Masks- a totally amazing two-part story which you should go check out immediately! This was written as a gift for a summer exchange we were both part of ^O^

anonymous asked:

We've had a ton of fake stories over the years, why have we made this such a big deal? I mean it's awful and disgusting but...ok?! We've talked about this way more than we should have.

i mean…..how many fake stories have pushed gross ideas such as harry hooking up with someone who was underage, harry including someone’s rare name in a song without bothering to warn them so the 1d fanbase can track her down within hours, the girl’s dad hearing a song about her on the today show unexpectedly when most people interpret the line “she feels so good” sexually, and so on and so forth. like ????? people bitched for ages about the harry and caroline flack thing (we STILL bitch about it) because while it was fake, it was uniquely nasty, so of course people are also gonna bitch about the ridiculous story behind carolina because 1) it started off being gross and 2) it’s changed like five times. sorry, but i’m not gonna normalize the underage bullshit that this story started with or any of the other gross stuff associated with it by being like ‘ohhhh whatever, they lie, let’s all move on.” nope. sorry, not happening.

jjonghugs  asked:

Heyyy I know you may have blocked requests but when they're open again, can you do one with Shinee as drunks?! Thank you!! No I'm not drunk, you are!

hohohoho you got it babe ;)

onew:

  • casually pounding shots
  • keeps pouring his members shots and if they refuse, pulls out the hyung card 
  • taemin dared him (with a shit-eating grin) to one-shot the soju bottle
  • stares dead at the members as he downs it allllllllll
  • shakes the bottle over his head for effect (onew: ONE SHOT / shinee: omg we need to carry him home) 
  • tbh he’s fine and will probably be carrying someone else home (taemin hundo p) 
  • goes on eating the dried squid on the table 
  • and also all of the crackers 
  • finding it very difficult to peel this clementine 

jonghyun:

  • suggests drinking games even though he’s so bad at them 
  • tbh he just wants to sing the drinking song in the beginning 
  • “마셔라, 마셔라, 마셔라, 술이 들어간다 쭉~ 쭉~ 쭉~” (drink, drink, drink, alcohol goes down well, well, well) 
  • also a terrible drinker and avoid shots 
  • once he didn’t want to a shot and just dumped it while everyone else drank (minho saw and they never stopped giving him shit for it) 
  • keeps talking about space (”it’s just so BIG and like the moon is just *there* in the sky isn’t that so amazing” / ot4: mhmmm) 
  • when they are in the vicinity of their dorm, he immediately struggles out of his clothes (”i hate clothes” / key: omg jonghyun pls you are an idol and we are in the elevator you canNOT be doing this rn there is a cctv in here YOU’RE GOING TO CAUSE A SCANDAL) 
  • pantless jonghyun running down the hall!!!!!!!!!!!!!

key:

  • his daegu satoori (accent) is OUT
  • if people are talking over him: “yah. yah. YAH LISTEN TO ME”
  • pressing his glass of ice water to his face bc he is heating up and needs to cool tf down 
  • keeps making i’m so hot jokes tho 
  • what’s in his shot glass is not actually soju  
  • surreptitiously poured water in it beforehand 
  • made eye contact with jonghyun when he did it (*mouths* i will murder you / jong: *nods* wait but me too) 
  • aigoo he wasn’t even going to drink today and now he’s mildly wasted 
  • LET’S GO TO THE CLUB 
  • at the dorm: is still able to brush his teeth, do his entire skincare routine, take out his contacts, put in his retainer 
  • @ himself when he wakes up: incredible 

minho:

  • not drunk
  • key: yes you are / minho: i will fight you and your WHOLE family / key: and my point is made for me
  • want to see how many shots he can do in a minute (ot3: absolutely not / taemin: yeah) 
  • giggling a lot 
  • asked the bar owner v cutely to turn on dream girl for them (shinee: you have no shame / minho: SHINEE’S BACK) 
  • two seconds later, standing on their chairs: drEEEAAM GIRL~~~~~~
  • refusing to drink water bc he will win. he will win against alcohol (onew: minho, i’m talking to sober you rn. sober you wants you to drink water. / minho: sober me is a wet blanket) 
  • in the morning: fUCK / onew: *chucks a water bottle at him* i fking told you

taemin: 

  • concentrating really hard on the table to make it stop moving
  • needs to close one eye to see his texts (taemin: im ginbe / kai: what) 
  • things are fine
  • he just needs to drink a lil bit of water
  • spills it all over his shirt while he tries to drink out of the water bottle
  • looks like he’s a participant in a wet t-shirt contest tbh
  • 2 mins later: why is he wet 
  • looks down like aw man 
  • it sobers him up a bit tho 
  • wakes to to multiple messages from his squad group chat like “did you live” 
  • brightens up considerably when he realizes that he has his phone!!!!
  • drunk tae is arguably more responsible than sober tae (key: you mean you have good friends you lil shit you threw your phone across the room last night and i picked it up)