how did this happen i am crying

i am absolutely done with parents’ shit

do you wanna hear a short story?

today, at lunch, my little sister said she didn’t like the soup

then, she wanted to put salt in it but it accidentally slipped too much

my mother started yelling at her that she did that on purpose and i tried to say that it wasn’t her fault and she just said ‘it was, i know how she is’ and then my sister started crying and left the kitchen

then, when my father came and asked what happened, i said that mother accused sister for throwing a bunch of salt in the soup on purpose

my mother started laughing and said that she thought that she slipped the salt, that she didn’t yell, she just glared at her


really? really?

she didn’t even think about going to apologise, she sent my other sister to tell her to come eat because if she doesn’t now, she won’t eat later

now, let me tell you, if it was the other way around (which happened loads of times)

my sister would have been obliged to go apologise or else she’d be grounded

is this normal? is this fucking normal?

and right now, my sister has locked up in her room, probably crying, probably not.

and then they have the nerve to ask me or any of my other siblings why we don’t talk to them about important things.

- prompt list -

Prompt List #1 ♛ Imagines

  1. “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.”
  2. “Please don’t cry. I can’t stand to see you cry”
  3. “Stay with me”
  4. “Walk out that door and we’re through”
  5. “Well. Yell, scream, say something. Anything”
  6. “I can’t breathe”
  7. “I hate how much I love you”
  8. “Why are you so jealous?”
  9. “Where do you think you’re going”
  10. “Just leave me alone”
  11. “I need some time”
  12. “Despite what you think, I am completely capable of taking care of myself”
  13. “You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!”
  14. “Just please be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to.”
  15. “Stop pretending you’re okay, cause I know you’re not.”
  16. “Just talk to me”
  17. “Bite me”
  18. “If you insist”
  19. “I think I’m in love with you, and that scares the crap out of me”
  20. “I think you’re just afraid to be happy”
  21. “Why are you so nice to me”
  22. “Choose me”
  23. “We’ll get through this, I promise”
  24. “You’re so fucking hot when you’re mad”
  25. “You’re mine. I don’t share”
  26. “Just shut up and kiss me.”
  27. “If we get caught I’m blaming you”
  28. “Make me”
  29. “Do you want to kiss as bad as I do right now”
  30. “I think I forgot how to breath”
  31. “Stop biting that fucking lip!”
  32. “You’re blushing”
  33. “I missed something didn’t I?”
  34. “You come to my room and wake me up at 4am, to cuddle?”
  35. “Well this is awkward”
  36. “Is that my shirt?”
  37. “You look like you need a hug”
  38. “I can’t believe you don’t like Disney movies”
  39. “Please come home, I miss you”
  40. “You’re so fucking adorable”
  41. “How can you still look so attractive while crying.”
  42. “I’m pregnant”
  43. “You’re lucky you’re cute”
  44. “Cuddle me.”
  45. “Sometimes I really don’t like you”
  46. “What if I told you I’ve been in love with you since we were kids.”
  47. “You’re seriously like a man-child.”
  48. “You’re getting crumbs all over my bed”
  49. “Im too sober for this”
  50. “Oh god, I need a drink”
Angst/fluff Prompt List

Please don’t repost (stealing isn’t cool, but reblog if you wish) <3 <3

  1. “I love you, please don’t go.”
  2. “Stay here tonight.”
  3. “Please don’t walk out of that door.”
  4. “I thought things were going great.”
  5. “Don’t you love me?”
  6. “You make every day worth living.”
  7. “I’ll keep you warm.”
  8. “I’m never letting you go.”
  9. “You meant too much to me.”
  10. “I won’t let you.”
  11. “How could you ask me that?”
  12. “Don’t you trust me?”
  13. “I won’t let anyone hurt you, you’re safe with me.”
  14. “You look amazing tonight.”
  15. “Shouldn’t you be with him/her?”
  16. “I’ve got you.”
  17. “I can’t sleep, can I stay here?”
  18. “It’s late.  Shouldn’t you be asleep?”
  19. “How are you feeling today?”
  20. “You look amazing tonight.”
  21. “We’ll figure this out.”
  22. “This isn’t goodbye.”
  23. “What’s cookin’ good lookin’?”
  24. “Wanna go grab a drink?”
  25. “What the hell were you thinking?!”
  26. “Here, let me help you.”
  27. “Kiss me.”
  28. “I care about you.”
  29. “You could have warned me!”
  30. “That was unexpected.”
  31. “You haven’t lost me.”
  32. “Why are you doing this?”
  33. “Don’t cry.”
  34. “Please don’t do this.”
  35. “You make me feel safe.”
  36. “You’ve shown me what love can feel like.”
  37. “Thank you, for everything.”
  38. “All I wanted was for you to be happy.”
  39. “I can’t do this on my own.”
  40. “I wasn’t lying when I said that I loved you.”
  41. “Don’t be afraid.”
  42. “You’re always on my mind.”
  43. “You have no idea how much I want you right now.”
  44. “You’ve always felt like home.”
  45. “I can’t imagine this world without you.”
  46. “Dance with me.”
  47. “Trust me.”
  48. “Why are you crying?”
  49. “Who hurt you?”
  50. “Nothing is wrong with you.”
  51. “You make me feel alive.”
  52. “I wouldn’t change a thing about you.”
  53. “Who cares about what they think?”
  54. “Let’s go.”
  55. “I’m not going anywhere.”
  56. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
  57. “You’ve always got me.”
  58. “I’ve waited for this moment for a long time.”
  59. “Is this okay?”
  60. “You look like you could use a hug.”
  61. “Did you need something?”
  62. “Do you have a ride home?”
  63. “I am home.”
  64. “What happened back there?”
  65. “That’s not gonna happen.”
  66. “Why me?”
  67. “I’m right where I belong.”
  68. “Fine.”
  69. “What do you want me to say?”
  70. “After everything we’ve been through, you still don’t think that I love you?”
  71. “You’ve been drinking tonight, haven’t you?”
  72. “You need sleep.”
  73. “Excuse me?”
  74. “What are you doing?”
  75. “What did you expect?”
  76. “You’re not alone.”
  77. “We’re meant for each other.”
  78. “You’re worth it.”
  79. “I don’t care what anyone else thinks.”
  80. “I’ve always been honest with you.”
  81. “It’s cold, you should take my jacket.”
  82. “Just breathe, okay?”
  83. “When I’m with you, I’m happy.”
  84. “Going somewhere?”
  85. “Don’t lie to me.”
  86. “Don’t be scared, I’m right here.”
  87. “You’re so adorable.”
  88. “I’m better, now that you’re here.”
  89. “I could never forget you.”
  90. “Forget it.”
  91. “That’s in the past.”
  92. “You make me happy.”
  93. “You’re more than that.”
  94. “I won’t lose you too.”
  95. “Come cuddle.”
  96. “Can’t you stay a little longer?”
  97. “It’s not that easy.”
  98. “I’ve had enough.”
  99. “I fell in love with you, not them.”
  100. “You’re the only one I wanna wake up next to.”
My bullet points for the Steven Universe Wanted event:

- We needed more of the Diamonds

- I love Blue Pearl even more now she is such a good artist

- I love Blue Diamond even more now// she was willing to entertain the thought that PD Wasn’t shattered by Rose and wanted a proper trial and holy shit how cool was that tear force field thing???

- Are we gonna talk about that look the Pearls gave each other when PD’s Pearl was mentioned or what???

- Are we gonna talk about the face BD pulled when Blue Zircon accused a Diamond of shattering PD?

- I’m on board if the theory that WD shattered  PD is true BUT Yellow Diamond totally did it am I right??? She just got pissed, not surprised or shocked when Blue Zircon started accusing and the crying from What’s The Use of Feeling Blue was almost certainly from guilt

- I really wish we could’ve seen what happened if Steven and Lars hadn’t escaped because Blue was ready to stop YD’s shitttt

- I LOVE THE NEW GEMS (p.s. I have a Padparadscha Sapphire gemsona so seeing one in the show was super cool and she’s adorable)

- LARS FUCKING DIED

- LION FUCKING DIED

- WHERE THE FUCK WERE PERI AND LAPIS???

- I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT THEY LEFT US ON THAT CLIFF HANGER I NEED MORE

- WE NEEDED MORE OF THE DIAMONDS

3

“[Steven] is one of my best friends. I was with him when he proposed to his wife. He’s been on this run with me since before I even started on the show. Losing him as a character and as a guy I get to hang out with every day is a bummer. It’s the last thing in the world I ever wanted to happen. You lose people on this show and you’re like, ‘That’s how the show works,’ but when you lose somebody that close to you, it just sucks. I’m a fan of the show as much as I am an actor on it, and I fall in love with these characters. You see these characters change, and I see people grow as actors, and I see them take chances, and I see them do things that blow my mind. I cry with them. I fight with them. We built this friendship since day one, just like Daryl and Glenn did. I fucking love Steven.” – Norman Reedus

Hwang Minhyun Mafia AU

warning: violence, drugs, guns, drinking, sexual harassment

  • you were a college student, working part-time at a restaurant downtown to earn some extra money
  • the pay was good, but there weren’t many waitresses so you would often get called in to cover extra shifts
  • the other waitress once explained to you that not many people wanted to work at that restaurant because the owner was involved in some “shady business”
  • you weren’t sure about shady business, but every once in a while, maybe once a month, the boss would clear out the restaurant except for a couple guests with large, heavy briefcases and crisp black suits
  • your boss would instruct you to serve the guests no food, just glasses of extremely expensive bourbon with ice
  • it was suspicious, but you were a college student and you needed money
  • one night, your boss pulled the team together to inform you of such events happening again
  • but for some reason, he warned you that if guns got pulled out, you were to head outside to the alley and escape
  • you traded worried glances with the rest of the serving team, heading to the back where you normally stayed during visits like these
  • “(y/n), you’re hostess for the night.” he called sharply, signalling for you to stay
  • normally you just got the guests their whiskey and left; being hostess meant checking on them and asking them how they were
  • “what? why?”
  • “i’ll pay you double”
  • “fine.”
  • the men arrive, clearly in two different groups
  • one of them is heavily tattooed, obviously carrying weapons on their bulky frames
  • the other group is much more crisp, neat, clean, with no visible tattoos or weapons
  • you ask them what they’d like to drink and a slender man smiles charmingly at you
  • “we’ll take whiskey, my dear”
  • you nod, hurrying back to the kitchen to get the drinks from the bartender, who tries to calm your shaky nerves
  • you bring the whiskeys back out, setting them down on the table in front of each man
  • you’re bending down to set the glass in front of the last tattooed man when the slender one who ordered snapped his fingers
  • “her eyes are up here, not on her ass” he said coolly, leaning back in his chair with an air of nonchalance
  • you did your best to keep your cool and not glare at the guy who had been apparently staring at your ass
  • you checked on them periodically, trying to smile through your teeth
  • every time, the charming man sent you a gentle smile, obviously aware of how nervous you were
  • just as you began to collect the glasses from the table, you heard a gun cock behind you
  • you felt like fainting right there and then when you saw, out of the corner of your eye, one of the burly tattooed men holding up a pistol
  • everything is still, even the air feels still
  • you hear someone shout for you to get down, and you collapse to the floor as gunshots begin and glass shatters loudly
  • you crawl towards the back kitchen as fast as you can, not taking care for the broken glass, all you can think about is the gunshots echoing in your ears
  • one of the burly men fell next to you with a thump, clearly passed out at least, if not dead
  • you screamed in surprise, trying to scramble away from him
  • in the chaos, you spotted another one of the tattooed men striding towards you
  • panicking, you grabbed the gun that the man who had passed out next to you had in his hand, lifting it up
  • the man coming towards you cursed, reaching into his belt, presumably to pull out his own gun
  • hoping to dear god that the magazine had bullets and that the movies were right, you pointed to the ground and squeezed the trigger
  • the backfire of the gun felt like a punch to the chest, knocking the wind out of you, but you managed to hit the guy in the foot?toe? and he collapsed to the ground with a shout
  • “very good” you heard someone chuckle into your ear
  • the charming guy was standing next to you, calmly shooting at the remaining men
  • once all the tattooed guys were down, either passed out or tied up with zipties produced by the manager, you looked down at your hands
  • they were shaking, your hand still tightly gripping the gun you’d taken
  • “hey, love, you’re okay now” the charming man said gently, reaching out to you and gently sliding the gun from your grasp
  • “let’s go sit down”
  • you let him lead you to one of the barstools, the shock of the whole situation hitting you
  • there’s a lot of commotion around you, the other men trying to clean up the broken glass, round up the tattooed men, but you can only focus on the man’s hands, holding your own
  • a small tattoo crept around his wrist from under his sleeve
  • “was that your first time firing a gun?” he asked gently, letting you wear his suit jacket
  • you nodded wordlessly, sipping a glass of water
  • he turned to the owner of the restaurant angrily
  • “i thought you said all your employees were aware?”
  • you didn’t even realize it, but hot tears started falling down your face, making you sniffle and blow your nose into the closest thing, which ended up being the guy’s jacket sleeve
  • whoops
  • “hey love, no need to cry” he said gently, patting you on the shoulder
  • “what just happened?” you whispered, eyes darting all over his sympathetic face “what happened? why am i involved?”
  • “we’re the 101, love,” he said slowly, “i’m minhyun, and you just witnessed what happens when another gang tries to get smart with the 101″
  • because you witnessed what you did, you’re required to at least have affiliation with the 101
  • you quit your job at the restaurant in favor of keeping minhyun’s office tidy and clean
  • he knew how shaken up you were about it, and he’s pretty much the only person in the 101 that you trust
  • he doesn’t really need someone to keep his office clean, but he feels bad that you got dragged into the 101, so he just makes up the job
  • you realize that you’ve started falling for his nice mannerisms and politeness, despite his rough exterior
  • sometimes when you’re cleaning while he’s in his office still, you’ll feel him staring at you intensely
  • you brush it off though
  • one night you were organizing some of his files when he stumbled into his office
  • he’d been gone on a raid outside of the city, and wasn’t supposed to be back until that morning
  • he was super beaten up and bloody, limping slightly
  • you gasp at the sight of him, rushing towards him 
  • “you need to get to a hospital, minhyun!”
  • he grabbed you by the hips, holding you close
  • “(y/n), i almost died tonight” he whispered, breath fanning across your lips
  • you felt your heart almost escape from your chest
  • “it made me realize how much i love you”
  • “m-minhyun, love is a strong word”
  • “i know” he stared at you deeply, eyes flickering from your lips back up to your eyes
  • you leaned in the rest of the way, kissing him deeply
  • your kiss was like the first time you met– violent, rough, passionate, and yet somehow sweet and charming
  • when you parted, lips swollen, he leaned against you, clutching his side
  • “minhyun, really, let’s get you to a hospital”
  • the whole way there, minhyun wouldn’t let go of your hand
  • when he got a quick operation, you had to pry his hand out of yours
  • let me tell you, you’re not escaping the 101 now
  • your relationship would be lazy mornings, random acts of love from minhyun, giving him massages after a particularly difficult night, him buying you a special, expensive pistol so that you can protect yourself, him going crazy when you press kisses into his tattoos, deep, lazy makeout sessions

narrating action scenes is hard for me since i tend to imagine things as though it were a movie with cinematographic shots and stuff, so describing what i see in my minds eye can be challenging and frustrating; i hope it all made sense nevertheless! 

Krasivaya-Chapter 5

Summary: You and Bucky Barnes have been friends for years. You are deeply, completely, in love with the super soldier, but he sees you as nothing more than a little sister. What happens when Bucky starts to date in earnest?

Pairings: Bucky x Reader, Bucky x OFC

Warnings: Smut, Angst, Self-Esteem issues, Depression?, Anxiety.

Song: Broken Seether ft Amy Lee

Bucky’s POV

 Oh, he had fucked up this time. His inability to describe how beautiful you truly were causing you deep pain. That made him disgusted with himself.

 The way you had shrunk in on yourself, reached for Steve for comfort, he was no longer your go to guy. No longer the man you sought out when you felt down. He had been replaced by his best friend. The best friend that got to touch you in ways he had only ever dreamt about. That got to kiss you and feel you and wake up to your smile.

He’d been so close to finally claiming you that day in the kitchen. So close to finally tasting you. But Steve just had to rip you away from him.

He was angry. Angry at you. Angry with Steve for not realizing how deeply in love with you he truly was.

“What the fuck was that, punk?” Steve spits out.

“That was me telling the truth. You wouldn’t ever go for a dame like her, and all of a sudden you can’t keep ya hands off of her?” He scoffs, watching as Steve sucks in a harsh breath.

“Jesus, Buck. What the hell is wrong with you?” Steve asks in disbelief.

He merely snorts, turning to Mel, “We’re going to bed,” he grits out. Yanking her from her seat, and ushering her down the hall. He’s slightly disgusted at the way she revels in his attention.

Shoving her hard against the door, he rips the top she’s wearing down the front, exposing her perfect body to the cool air. He wastes no time in sucking a nipple into his mouth.

Her moan sounds wrong to his ears. Her body doesn’t feeling right under his hands. Her hands tug at his hair. “James,” she moans.

He cringes at the tone of her voice, wishing with everything he has that it was you writhing underneath him.

He growls out, “On your knees.”

She complies immediately, sinking down to the ground, fumbling with his zipper.

All he needed was to forget.

Melissa was a means to an end.

Your POV:

You were curled up in a ball on your bed, listening to the moans filtering through the wall.

It had you sick to the stomach. Bile rises in your throat. You wanted nothing more than to run from this place. But you had a duty. A responsibility to the people of the world. You were never one to give up when the going got tough.

Steve enters the bedroom, his nose crinkling in disgust as he hears the moans of his best friend through the wall. He doesn’t bother asking your permission. He picks you up bridal style, carrying you to his bedroom, and depositing you on his bed. He crawls in behind you, nuzzling into your hair, the well of emotion finally bubbles over.

“Why can’t I be pretty like her, Stevie?” you sob as you shove your face into the pillow. “Why can’t he see me for what I am?”

Steve strokes your hair, listening as you cry out your pain.

“How did I end up here? How did I become this person?”

Steve sighs. “Oh, doll. Why can’t ya see how beautiful, how special you truly are?” he says, sadness bleeding into his tone.

You snort. “I’m not though, am I? He only sees a fat, useless lump! God knows I’ve tried, Steve. I’ve tried to make him see me as more, but he’ll only ever see the outside. He’ll never know how much I love him.” Words drown in the ugly crying which is currently happening.

“Shh, baby girl. It’s gonna be okay.” Steve tries to comfort you, hugging you tighter. “He’s a fool for not seein’ what’s right in front of him, and I’m always gonna be here for ya, darlin’.”

You turn to face him, hope plain on your face. “Do you mean it? You aren’t going to toss me to the side when you find someone to love?”

He chuckles dryly. “Oh, doll. I could never do that to ya, you’re my friend. And ya mean the world ta me. I promise I’ll always be there for ya.”

You believe him.

Steve Rogers isn’t one to lie. He’s too good, too pure.

Content with the knowledge that you aren’t completely alone in the world, you fall into a dreamless sleep, snuggled tightly in Captain America’s arms.

Tags: Let me know if Tumblr is still eating your tag. xx

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When your heart is a stranger

[A/N: Lucifer. Missing moments during 2x13. Deckerstar because of course. Title taken from the song of the same name by Friends in Paris aka the last song in the episode.]

She’s visibly shaking as she takes off her sweater.

“What on earth are you doing?” He asks, alarmed as he reaches out a hand to stop her.

“Lucifer, no one’s going to look twice at me if I’m wearing a blood soaked shirt.”

He looks down at her, standing in front of him clad only in black jeans and a plain black bra. It must say something about the progression of their relationship that she doesn’t even shy away from his gaze. It must say something more about how utterly rattled he is by the poison coursing through her veins that he doesn’t even think to stare.

Instead, he simply looks her in the eye and raises a brow. That it’s neither lecherous nor teasing comes as a surprise to them both.  

“Well, they’re certain to look at least three times at you if that’s what you’re planning on wearing.”

She tilts her head up at him, somehow manages to give the impression of rolling her eyes even as the corners of her mouth turn up.

“Though I’d say anyone would look at least twice at you even if you were wearing a paper bag,” he says, mostly to distract himself from the way the small upturn of lips tugs at the corners of his heart. He shrugs and tries for a teasing smile. “More so, I wager, depending on the size of the bag.”

She grins at him, though the movement is wan and lopsided.

“Have any of those lying around for me?”

He can tell she says it mostly for his benefit, which means he must be much worse at hiding his panic than he thought. He tries to school his face into something approaching nonchalant as he watches her shake out her jacket and sling it around her shoulders. The effect is immediately, absurdly attractive.

Except that his entire focus is stuck on how sallow her skin looks in the moonlight, how he can feel the heat emanating off of her despite the fact that she’s shivering. So instead of giving voice to the half dozen overtly affectionate phrases he can feel in back of his throat, he shrugs out of his jacket and moves behind her to help her into it.

“Lucifer - .”

“Detective,” he says, the word dangerously close to a plea, “as radiant as you are and as cool as your jacket looks, it seems to do very little in terms of warmth. No one is going to approach you if you continue to shiver like that.”

Truthfully, he assumes at least a half dozen men would approach her in any state of dress - or undress, as it were - shivering or no. Which she must know, too, the way that she’s looking at him. After a long moment, she sighs and removes the dark leather jacket from around her shoulders, thrusting it towards him and threading her arms into the sleeves of his jacket instead. Once she’s completely wrapped in it, she turns around and flings her arms out wide.

“How do I look?”

A shiver lances through her before he can reply.

He frowns and steps forward to button up the jacket, trying not to think about how close she is, how much he simply wants to wrap her in his arms.

For - what reason? No other he can discern other than the pleasure of being close to her.

The thought brings a furrow between his brows. Closeness for it’s own sake is a new desire for him. It’s disconcerting, having spent so long carefully cataloging every type of desire, to suddenly be confronted with a new one.

He finishes the last button and steps back, glancing at the full length of her. The sleeves fall past her hands, a testament to his long frame in comparison to her small one. She glares at the sleeves as though they’ve done something to personally offend her. The movement of her brows and crinkling of her nose filling him with an absurd sort of longing. He gives a slight shake of his head as he steps in closer to her once again, the elegant taper of his fingers folding up the ends of the sleeves, careful to touch her without really touching her.

He smooths down the sleeves and looks back up at her.  

“Well?” She asks, arching a brow at him.  

He forces himself to step away from her, his traitorous hands wanting to linger at the ends of his jacket sleeves.

If he were not so preoccupied with the glazed look that keeps creeping towards the irises of her eyes, if he were not so desperately trying to push down the feelings of panic and anger and betrayal, he might make some offhand joke about how good she looks in his clothes. The look on her face tells him that she certainly expects it.

But then a shadow passes over her face and he watches her swallow back her own fear and panic. Suddenly he is just too tired and defeated and utterly destroyed to be anything but honest.

So instead he smiles, the movement soft, its edges brittle.

“Radiant.”

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anonymous asked:

Can I request a headcannon where MC has a major crush on RFA+Saeran&V but had a past relationship which hurt them deeply, and feel like they would never be able to be happy, kinda like Seven. When they find out they love them back, MC panics, and doesn't want to believe it. They try so hard to not panic, but still have that tiny fear, which becomes huge that they dont love the MC. They probably need a lot of reassurance. I'm so sorry.. I had a rough month ;;

Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry to read that, I hope you’re feeling better and if you feel like it, my chat is always open. Talk to me if you want to, okay?

So, I hope this brings you some comfort:

RFA + Saeran and V with a MC who’s afraid of love


Zen

  •  Come on, everybody in Korea must have a crush on Zen, you are not different
  • That’s what you’ve been telling yourself in order to convince that these feelings aren’t a big deal
  • Everytime he hugs you and tells you how cute you are, you feel like melting!
  •  Yes, it’s a very familiar sensation, as you already heard this from another rising star in the show business.
  • That fling with that singer ended as fast as it started, but he has fame, money and lots of people who idolize him, what do you have now?
  • So yeah, forget that heat growing all over your body when Zen confessed his love for you. You heard this before, you couldn’t handle being hurt again, no, not by him.
  • Zen didn’t expect that reaction from you. When he told you, he was waiting for a “Oh my God! I love you back!” and the most romantic kiss ever. Instead, he won a “I see…” and you walking away from his apartment.
  • He went after you, meeting you sitting in the emergency stairs and crying. “MC! What happened? Why are you crying?”
  • “Why did you do this to me, Zen? Couldn’t you keep this as a fan-idol relationship? Why did you have to tell me this?”
  • “Because I… couldn’t keep it to myself anymore. I love you, I… have been in love with you for a while now. And… I understand you don’t feel the same way, but…” you stared at him.
  • “Zen, I feel the same way! That’s the problem! Don’t you see?” he couldn’t see the problem, no. You sighed: “How am I not sure you won’t leave me as soon as you get really famous? Or worst, you’ll try to hide me from everybody? I can’t be a guilty pleasure, Zen! I wouldn’t be able to endure this again!”
  • Oh, now he knows what’s going on. Yeah, when he met you, he knew you were familiar, you dated that guy from the labor record he’s about to be hired. And he felt… angry and sad for you, like that guy broke his heart by breaking yours.
  • So he hugged you and hummed lullabies to you to calm you down. You knew you shouldn’t let him that close, but… could you resist him?
  •  You were scared and worried, and your love for him was flooding your heart. You wanted his love, but right now, what you really needed was his patience.
  • And he would be patient.

 

Yoosung

  • How could you not fall for him? He was caring, smart, sweet…
  • He’s so different from all the guys you’ve been dating so far. All of them so rude and selfish.
  • But maybe you deserved it? Well, so what have you done differently to deserve Yoosung? Nothing, right?
  • So you don’t deserve him. And worse: you’ve got so used to being hurt, what if you ended up hurting him? No…
  • That was the first thing you thought when he confessed his feelings for you.
  • He was a sweating nervous mess, yet he said it. And though he still had hop, he was pretty much waiting for a rejection.
  • But you didn’t really reject him, you just told him you needed to go and… ignored him for the rest of the week, which was even worse than a direct rejection.
  • He didn’t want to piss you off, but he needed an answer, even if was a “no” so he could at least try to move on… emphasis on try.
  • When you saw him waiting for you at your place’s door, you wanted to turn around and run, but your legs felt weaker. Something about his curious eyes staring at you pulled you towards him.
  • “I’m sorry, MC.” What? But you’ve been ignoring him, you should be the one to say this. See what I’m saying? You would definitely hurt him eventually.
  • “Don’t be sorry. You did nothing wrong. Well, except for falling for me.” “MC… why would you say something like this?”
  • “Because I’m so scared of hurting you, Yoosung. You don’t deserve being hurt like I did, you have no idea how awful it is, and I don’t want you to ever feel like this, especially because of me!”
  • “I’m pretty sure you didn’t deserve either, MC. I… I don’t know exactly what you’ve been through, but… I know you didn’t deserve it. And… if you know how it feels, then you won’t do to other people, right? To me… if you… you know, if you really like me…”
  • He hugged you timidly, but you could feel all his love and care for you. You two were so insecure, would it worth chasing this relationship?
  • Yes, it would. And he will definitely chase it.

Jaehee

  • Falling for her was a big surprise for you.
  •  You crushed and hid all the feelings you ever had for women before ever since that girl from school not only rejected you, as also dragged you out of the closet for everybody to know.
  • So you swore you would never fall for a woman before and… well, that didn’t work out, did it?
  • But when Jaehee told you she was in love with you, you… didn’t know how to respond.
  • Because it was new for you. You know, having reciprocated feelings for a woman?
  • And that was the problem! It was new! You didn’t know what to do, what if your inexperience made you really mess things up?
  • So, as much as you wanted to yell “I LOVE YOU BACK!” you kept serious and told her you two were better as friends.
  • And there was that part of her that agreed with you. It was better, she couldn’t risk losing you forever if a romantic relationship didn’t work out.
  • So she settled for this. You both settled.
  • But it was so uncomfortable, it wasn’t the same thing as before now that you knew you two felt the same way, and the only thing getting on the way of happiness was you and your fears.
  • She noticed you were distant, and when she couldn’t stand your cold treatment anymore, she confronted you: “You told nothing would change after I confessed, MC. But it did! Why? You think I’m going to attack you? Are you scared of me?” she didn’t want to come off angry, but she was desperate.
  • “Never, Jaehee! I’m scared of myself…” “What… what do you mean?” “I’m scared of not knowing how to deal with my feelings for you, they are so overwhelming, but… I’m scared because it’s all new to me, Jaehee.”
  • Now she’s the one feeling overwhelmed, you… feel the same as she does? All this time?
  • “I’m scared too. This is very new to me as well.” She says, hugging you.
  • Well, so maybe you could guide each other in this new journey?

Jumin

  • It took you a while to notice your admiration and needing to take care of him wasn’t a friendship thing.
  • You desired him with every inch of your body and soul. But he seemed so out of your league.
  • Yes, how somebody like him could ever look at you and see something other than a silly, innocent and cully person?
  • So when he confessed to you, showing an eloquence he never showed before, you legitimately thought this was a joke.
  • He had an odd sense of humor, but honestly, this was cruel. Playing with people’s feelings like this was beyond unacceptable, even for someone who struggled so much with feelings like him.
  • You were offended, you never expected something so cruel coming from him. Wasn’t he a gentleman? Wasn’t he trying to be more aware of people’s feelings?
  • So you told him to go away and only look for you when he has a proper apology. And he left, confused and… hurt?
  • He got a headache from how much he wondered about what he could possibly have done wrong. He was new to this, but… the magazines he read and the soap operas he watched gave him the feeling he was on the right track with this.
  • Maybe it was because you didn’t feel the same way as he did? But still, he knew you, you were gentle, sweet, you would reject him politely.
  • So disobeying you, he looked for you without a proper apology, he needed to know what he did wrong and how could he make it right in the future. Maybe not with you, but with someone who could make him feel a little like you do, if this was even possible.
  • “I’m sorry to bother you but I need an answer, MC.” “Oh, you need an answer? How pretentious of you, Jumin, seriously! I never expected you to disappoint me like this!”
  • “So tell me why. Why am I a disappointment? What have I done wrong to you?” “You really want to make me say it? Oh my God…” you were only getting madder, you two weren’t going nowhere with this.
  • “MC, I love you. Period. And although I don’t know what I did, I understand you don’t feel the same way and I apologize if I made you feel uncomfortable. I only wish good things to you, I would never hurt you on purpose.” Yes, that was right… he would never do this. So… this meant…
  • “I… feel the same way, Jumin. I… am the one who should apologize. I got so defensive thinking you were joking.” “Why would I ever joke about my love for you?” “Because… I never thought someone like you could seriously love someone like me.”
  • But he did, and looking for professional help for the love of his life was his first top priority now.

Saeyoung

  • How would you not fall for him? You loved all his sides.
  • The funny 707 and the deep Saeyoung, you loved in all of his facets, would they be bad or good.
  •  And knowing all his insecurities and depressive thoughts, you knew you couldn’t be an extra problem for him.
  • So when he told you how much he loved you, you knew he couldn’t be thinking straight, this was his fears getting the best of him.
  • So now it was your turn on pushing him away. You told him you were flattered, but you two were better as friends.
  • He was waiting exactly for this, but he didn’t regret getting this off his chest. At least now he could live in peace with this knowing he tried, he wouldn’t be wondering what could have happened if he never told you anything.
  • But he missed you… he missed you so much!
  • He missed your conversations over the phone, your laugh, your honesty… he needed to talk to you gain.
  • He hesitated a lot, you already said no, why was he insisting? Call it crazy, but it was almost like God was telling him this wasn’t over.
  • And there he was, standing at your door with the RoboCat. “Meow~ God Seven is with the person he likes!” the cat said.
  • “That’s right, RoboCat.” “Saeyoung, I…” “~God Seven already knows your answer, but he misses you, meow. Can’t you two be friends?”
  • “I’m afraid not, RoboCat, I… regardless of what I feel, I can’t be another problem on Go… Saeyoung’s life.”
  • “What do you mean with ‘regardless of what you feel’?” he asked, not RoboCat. “Do you… like me back, MC?”
  •  “~Meow, I sense love from both ways here.” “Yes, but…” there was no but, not for him, so he went to hug you.
  • Although you didn’t say much, he knew exactly what you were feeling and why you were holding back. He would show you that there was no need to.

 

Saeran

  • Oh my god, how did that happen?
  • He was relying on you to help him with therapy and you were having these romantic fantasies about him? How stupid of you!
  • And selfish! He counted on you, and you daydreaming about something he would probably never be able to correspond?
  • But then… he confessed. And nothing made sense anymore.
  • No, he was confused, he was projecting in you, right? He couldn’t actually be in love with you or with anyone else, for that matter.
  • So, painfully you backed away. It was for his own good.
  • Saeran wasn’t angry, but he was sad. Was he really reading the signs that wrong? He knew he wasn’t the best at this, but… weren’t you being very clear how much you cherished him?
  • He thought he was allowed to feel the same, but… he wasn’t? Why? And even if that was the case, why would you back away like this? This wasn’t like you!
  • No, you were sweet and even if you didn’t love him, you cared for him, you wouldn’t abandon him like this, never!
  • He needed to know exactly what was going on, so he convinced his brother to look for you.
  • But he didn’t ask his brother to call you and tell you Saeran was missing you. No, he didn’t want you to feel pity or obligated to come and see him.
  • But as soon as you did, he realized how much he was missing you. And you definitely missed him too…
  • “What happened to you?” he asked, he didn’t want to sound hurt, but maybe he was and that’s how it came off. “I’m… I’m sorry for being weird, MC. I didn’t want to scare you and I really thought I was doing the right thing…”
  • “Saeran, there’s nothing wrong with you, I… I think I’m the problem here. Because I love you so much and that’s a problem because that’s not what you need from me!” “Let me the judge on that.” He said, pulling you for a hug.
  • Yes, you definitely needed each other’s love.

V

  • He was everything you could want in a person.
  • He was intelligent, sweet, caring, he was… perfect!
  • Your therapist talked about this tendency of yours. Falling for men who seem out of reach so you could be rejected and sink in your low self esteem all over again.
  • Were you doing this again? Because it felt a little different… well, it felt different the other times too…
  • So when he confessed to you, you weren’t sure how to react. You were being corresponded for the first time.
  • This amazing guy loves you back, yes, that’s the problem, he’s too amazing for you, he would notice pretty fast that there was nothing fascinating about you…
  • So why even bother trying to start something that is destined to end up bad. With you hurt for not being able to match him?
  • You told him you needed some time to think, and of course he didn’t oppose, he would give you all the time you needed!
  •  But it’s been a while, actually, really long, he didn’t hear from you. He felt a weird vibe coming from you, but he thought you were just shy.
  • He didn’t want to pressure you, but… he wanted to know if he could have hope or if he should try to let you go.
  • So he asked to talk to you alone when you two meet at a RFA gathering.  You didn’t want to, but you had, you let him hanging on for too much time.
  • “MC, I don’t mean to pressure you or anything, but it’s been a while since I opened up my heart to you, and I…” “V, I like you so much! You have no idea!, but…”
  • “But?” “I’m so afraid of how much it will hurt when you realize I’m not good enough for you…”
  • “MC, This will never happen. I can guarantee you with all my love for you.” He hugged you and kept saying sweet things to you until the RFA realized you two wouldn’t be coming out and they should leave.
  • You would definitely have to go back to therapy, and he would always be there to support you.
i woke up, and you were gone
i did not cry
this was a kind of pain
that no tears would soothe
my mind knew that my body had already been through so much
and i did not cry

i woke up, and you were gone
sheets stained with red and a searing ache ripping through me
i never thought i would lose you like this
i imagined it would happen years down the road
with a graduation cap on your head, a new home in a new city waiting for you
with tears in my eyes as i tell you how proud i am of you
it wasn’t supposed to happen like this
not like this, not this painful, not this soon

i woke up, and you were gone
i never even got to say goodbye
i wonder if you did.
—  Anonymous said: could you write about the aftermath of having a miscarriage. feeling nothing but everything at the same time
(cc, 2017)
Stitches

When I stay at my parents’ house I sleep in the room of a girl I’ve never met. I am called by her name. I see her clothes in the closet and her things in the drawers. They don’t fit me anymore. I hold up the dresses, the T-shirts—did they ever fit me? And if they did, what was that girl like? I run my hands over the smooth surface of her life in my mind. Every thread is in place, but my rough fingernails snag and ruin it.

I can play pretend at being her if I try hard enough. She has my nose, shares my favorite color, cross stitches the rhythm of her thoughts like me. During the period where she blurred into me, we learned to sew. X’s in neat lines, rows of prayers.

Embroidery starts with intricacies, stitches I squint to see. They are never the same color as I expect at the beginning, numbered skeins of embroidery floss organized before use. Three stitches like my mother taught me. Secure the thread on the fabric. One for an anchor, two for luck, three for insurance. Always leave a tail of thread. The stitches must be small and perfect.

My mother taught me to sew, her mother taught her, it’s the earliest form of female self-expression. Women teaching girls teaching their daughters to create in careful, useful ways. Whip stitches, back stitches, cross stitches, the secret ways that women learned to survive.

I am not a woman; still the craft has been passed to me.

People on the street call me miss and ma’am and remind me of my needle and thread beginnings, how the tail dangles from the piece I’m working on and gets tangled. My heritage is cross stitched and hanging on the wall in my childhood bedroom, sewn by my pregnant mother twenty years ago.

           I hear my mother cry through the thin walls of her house, she asks God why did I have to be like this. What happened to her daughter. I ask God to take the damage out on me instead, spare her from what my existence does to her. In her eyes, I am burning; in her eyes, I am not enough.

When I was thirteen a distant ER doctor sewed my tear-stained chin up. Fell off a bike that I was too small to be riding, growing up too fast, trying to fly away. Saw my bone for the first time, jarringly white, like I was free of sin. The doctor numbed it, I sobbed. I can still feel the pull of the thread, the butterfly needle, the this won’t hurt a bit. Couldn’t sleep on my side for a week, my chin dripped mucous and antibacterial ointment. The stitches tickled for three days. I still have the scar.

My mother sat me down in the kitchen two weeks later and cut them out carefully, sewing scissors, healing flesh. A different kind of pull, like a bad spirit leaving my body. I trusted her; twenty years of embroidery made her hands sure.

Two years later I came out to my parents, sitting on the same kitchen chair. I played it off as casual—there are worse things to be—and didn’t meet their eyes.          

When I stumble across my dad’s search history, I see articles with titles like “Trans-Trending” and “Why So Many Millennials Are Bisexual” and “Just A Phase?” and it’s been five, almost six years. I know he’s still trying to make sense of it. I wonder why he can’t just ask me. I wonder why I can’t ask him either, why I whip-stitch my lips together when I go home to him. He talks about his daughter with pride in his eyes. I bite my tongue at the she and silently replace it with they.

I’ve never said anything, and I don’t know if I ever will. I’m afraid of the response I’ll get, ashamed to be stripped down to bone.

I wake up in a cold sweat. I dream about my grandmother’s delicate hands quilting scraps of fabric while her husband went on strike and her family ate mostly love. I watched her hands shrivel and falter, caught the needle as it dropped. It pricked my fingers crimson; she was buried with her thimble. The fabric she stitched lays over me during the night. There are too many holes to keep me warm; the wind sings it to shreds. I shiver and she places her hands over mine, the last of her warmth.  

I am sewing her skin to mine; she is living through my young and trembling hands. Intricacies, keeping us stitched together. My mother did the same thing, I think. She has a bookshelf of patterns, some she’ll never sew. I silently leave a space in my home for the patterns to become mine. The empty spot gathers dust, yawning at me. There are pieces to be rearranged on my walls, beautiful, finished works of needlecraft.

I try to become the front of the embroidery, carefully created without a stray thread. The back is not supposed to show once it’s finished, covered with felt or a frame. I try to become the front; I am and will always be the wayward ends and the furled knots with their blurry shape and messy colors.

I’m not what a woman should be. I’m not even what a woman is. I stitch the confusion into my work, try to make some sense of it by organizing patterns. My thoughts grind against each other like transverse faults. Healing comes slowly, if at all. I let the fading light stream through the blinds of my apartment window and warm my face.

I make do—intricacies, French knots, squares in circular feminine boxes.

 My mother looks as me like my queer body is dirty sometimes, trying but falling short of understanding. I try to see nobility in my queerness where my mother sees sin.

anonymous asked:

Any mccree/hanzo/76/reaper hc's for depressed!s/o who who has suicidal tendencies; endangering herself without thinking twice, volunteering first for dangerous missions, basically wouldn't mind dying or getting hurt because she's got no self worth?

McCree

- Doesn’t really notice at first because he’s the same way. Between Deadlock, Blackwatch, and being a wanted vigilante, he’s used to jumping into dangerous situations without a second thought

- It isn’t until you get hurt on a mission that Mercy tells him she’s not surprised you got hurt, only that it took so long

- He asks her what she means, and she tells him that you jump into as many dangerous situations as he does, but you don’t have as much skill or training. Even with those, Jesse lost an arm, it was only a matter of time until something happened to you

- He asks you why you do that and when you break down crying and telling him how worthless you are, he puts his arms around you pulls you close. “Well Darlin’, I’d miss ya a whole lot,” he tells you. “So maybe you could tone it down a little, for me?”

Hanzo

- It doesn’t take him long to recognize your behavior

- It’s what he does, it’s what he did for years after ‘killing’ Genji, but he’s trying to change and forgive himself, and he hates that you’re hurting that much

- “[Name], I am worried about you. You keep throwing yourself into deadly situations and one day, you’re actually going to get killed.”

-You just smile sadly at him, “Hanzo, I’m just one person, I don’t matter in the grand scheme of things.”

- He uses one hand to grab yours as uses the other to make you look at him, “You matter to me, and I would miss you terribly.”

Soldier 76

- Doesn’t realize how bad it is until you do something that should have gotten you killed (how you survived is a miracle)

- He puts all the little pieces together and realizes how little self-preservation instinct you have

- But the thing is, he’s doing the exact same stuff, so he can’t really tell you to stop. That’d be hypocritical and he’s done  doing that

- He sticks to telling you to be careful and how sad he’d be if something happened to you

- Tries to accompany this with a hug, kiss, you’re just looking into you’re eyes everytime

- He’s trying to convey how much you mean to him, but he’s not sure how

Reaper

- Recognizes it immediately

- “What do you think you’re doing?”

- You try to pretend you don’t know what he’s talking about but he’s having none of that

- You’re not worthless and he’s not going to let you get yourself killed

- Might lock you in your room to keep you from going on a particularly dangerous mission

- He’s just trying to keep you alive  

Be Okay- Harry Styles Imagine

Warnings: Language and self deprecation

A/N: Hope you guys enjoy this story I put together! Sorry that the ending isn’t the best, I just really wanted to post it before going to sleep so I rushed it. Thanks lovelies<3

Ever since the boys split up, fans have been looking for someone or something to point their fingers at. Of course, there were some fans that understood that the boys of One Direction just needed to go their separate ways. But others wanted to blame one person in particular, you.

Your relationship with Harry started a couple months before Zayn left and has been going strong since. However, due to the timing of you starting to date Harry, a few fans like to blame you for the destruction of One Direction. Lately, however, the hate has gotten worse. You had prayed that with Harry releasing new music, the birth of Liam’s baby, and the other guys being successful with their dreams, that the hurtful comments and hate would stop. Unfortunately, you have never been more wrong.

Scrolling through twitter, Instagram, and other social media sites often left you in tears as you saw comment after comment about how you’re a “bitch”, “whore”, and much worse. Harry of course, knew about the hate, and he tried his best to help you get through it. But you felt as though he just didn’t completely understand. Here he was getting constant love form all his fans, meanwhile they are trying to tear you apart and break you.

Today was the worst experience with hate that you have seen so far. Although seeing the hurtful comments was hard, this one was nearly unbearable. As you walked out of the store with your friend, you could almost sense that something was off. However, you weren’t sure what it was until you were standing next to your car.

At first you could barely even tell it was your car. It was almost unrecognizable with the spray paint across its blue hood. The words read “die bitch” in white letters. The driver’s side windows were completely smashed, leaving traces of glass all over the seats and the ground.

“We should call someone” your friend says quietly. No words could come out of your mouth, only small sobs, and tears strolling down your cheeks. “Do you want me to call your parents or Harry?”

“No” you choked out. “I’ll be fine. Let’s just call a cab. I’ll take care of this when I get home.”

The ride home with your friend was silent. The entire time you just kept staring at the pictures you took of your car. Disbelief filled your head as you never thought anyone would do this to you. Once your friend was dropped off, you decided to call Harry to see if he has already heard about what happened. As the phone rang, you felt your heart skip a few beats, unsure of how to go about this conversation.

“Hey love” he answers.

“Hi babe, I was just calling to see what you were doing.”

“I’m just finishing up in the studio, but I should be home in about an hour. Why what’s up?”

“Oh nothing” you lie. “I just wanted to see when you’d be home so we can just talk then.”

“(Y/n) is everything all right” he asks. Of course Harry could always tell when something was off with you. Whenever you had the chance to talk to him you would talk for what felt like hours, so he was concerned when you said you wanted to wait until he was home.

“Yeah everything is fine. I love you and I’ll see you later.”

“Alright baby, I love you too.” There was a hint of sadness to his voice, but you ignored it and hung up.

As the cab pulled up to your house, you thanked the driver and paid your fare. Once you set your bags in your room, you sat down in your living room letting out a sigh. While waiting for Harry to get home you scrolled through your twitter to see that the story of your car has already hit media. Worry filled your mind, as you didn’t want Harry to see any of the articles posted, or any of the other additional comments left by some fans.

To your surprise there was a mix of positive and negative responses to the article. Some fans shared their pity and shock for what happened. But others wished someone had done something sooner, or worse, wished it would have been you that was bashed, instead of your car windows. Loud, audible sobs left your lips as you read hurtful comments, one right after the other.

“Babe I’m home” Harry yelled as he walked in.

“Shit” you muttered while you tried to clear your face so that he couldn’t tell you had been crying. “Hi Harry.”

“So what did you do today?”

“Oh I just went shopping, nothing special. How was it at the studio?”

“It was amazing. Words cannot describe how excited I am to start touring again. I just feel like everything is falling into place” he says with a soft smile. “I was wondering though, where’s your car? I didn’t see it in the drive way so at first I thought you wouldn’t be home.”

“It’s at the shop” you say a bit too quickly. “One of my tires popped so I just had it towed there and I’ll pick it up tomorrow.”

“How did you get home then” he questions giving you a look of concern.

“I just took a cab” you answer, avoiding eye contact with him.

“Awe, babe, next time just call me and I’ll come and pick you up.” Harry approaches you, holding out his hands and placing them on your hips. The moment his hands touch your body, an uncontrolled sniffle comes out. He gives you a look of confusion, unsure as to why you were upset.  

“Harry, we need to break up.” You spoke so softly, but Harry still heard every word. His green eyes turned glossy, as if he was ready to cry.

“What are you talking about” he asked through shaky breaths.

“I can’t do this anymore. I’m just not happy.”

“Was it something I’ve done? If it’s because of me spending so much time on the album or the tour, then baby I’m so sorry. I’ll put it all on hold if it means that I won’t have to lose you. Just tell me what I can do to save us.” His voice had a begging tone to it.

“I’m sorry Harry, trust me it’s not you-“

“Don’t give me the ‘it’s not you it’s me’ stuff, because I don’t believe it one bit. Something must have happened to make you feel this way. So just tell me what it is and we can work through it. Please (y/n) just tell me.”

Taking a few steps away from Harry, you take a few deep breaths, debating on how to handle this. Yes, you loved Harry, he was your everything. But you also knew he could do so much better, and have any girl he wanted. If you stay in this relationship with Harry, are you being selfish? Is it wrong to stay with the person you love, even though you don’t deserve them?

“Everyone hates me” you say in a hushed voice.

“Wha-What?” He looks at you confused, having no idea where you plan on going with this.

“You’ve seen the hate I get. Constant messages of how I destroyed One Direction, and am ruining your life. I just can’t take it anymore. I’m sorry.”

“Fuck those guys. Those people who say they love my music but talk shit about you, are not my real fans. They are just jealous of how insanely beautiful and talented you are. I know hearing those things hurt, but don’t care about what they say, just listen to me, and believe me when I say I love you.” His voice sounded panicky and urgent as if any moment he will lose you.

“It’s not just their words anymore Harry. It’s now their actions as well. Do you want to know the real reason why my car isn’t here? It’s because someone smashed in my windows and wrote ‘die bitch’ on the hood. So I’m sorry if I just can forget about it.” You voice cracked every other word and you spoke so quickly you weren’t even sure if Harry understood a single word that you said.

A silence fell in the room as you two stood apart from one another. Slow tears fell down Harry’s face as he watched you shake and sob. Taking slow steps, Harry approached you, and placed his large hands to your cheeks. Your eyes locked with his for a moment, until he moved to lightly place his lips to your temple.

“I’m so sorry baby, I had no idea. We can figure this out. In fact, I’m going to find out who did this to your car. I won’t let anyone hurt you anymore.”

“Harry there’s only so much you can do. I just don’t think we will work-“

“(Y/N) please. I love you so much. I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. We can figure this out, please baby.” He locked his eyes with yours, and kept a hand on your chin so that you couldn’t look away. “Tell me that you’re not happy and you don’t love me, and I will leave right now. I won’t bother you about this again.”

“Harry… you’ve made me the happiest I’ve ever been and I’ve never felt this way about someone before. I don’t want to lose what we have, but I also don’t want to hold you back. You can have anyone you want, so why me?”

“Don’t you see that you are the girl I want, the one that I need. I don’t care about anyone else but you. I promise I will do whatever it takes to make you happy every day. I promise to keep you safe from all the people who try to hurt you. And most of all, I promise I will love you unconditionally, with all my heart.”

Your body was still shaking from being unable to contain your emotions. Within one smooth motion, Harry met his lips with yours. The kiss was soft and passionate, and exactly what the both of you needed. It just helped reassure that Harry was the person you were supposed to be with. Sure the hate is hard, but with Harry by your side, you could overcome anything.

haikyuu characters as celebrities
  • oikawa: *typing frantically* oh,, oh my god,,, how on earth did this happen,,,, oh my,,,,,,, *tear falls* they discovered i run my own fan page
  • hinata: HELLO I AM HINATA AND YOU ARE A FAN AND I LOVE YOU
  • kageyama: (at a sold out concert) why are you here i'm not a celebrity go home
  • kuroo: (dancing to single ladies with oikawa; fans crying)
  • kenma: i started as a background part why do i have tabloids
  • noya: i don't hide from the paparazzi. the paparazzi hides from me.

Warmth
also on ao3

-

It’s like a fire spreading from his chest, painful and unbearable. It consumes his lungs and he can feel his breath coming out in short, stutter-y gasps. He clutches his chest with one hand while the other grips his throat. A choked sound escapes him as the tears start flowing.

It’s all overwhelming — he can’t think clearly and he just — he needs to calm down.

But he can’t.

Because when the fiery hand of fear had placed its hold on him before, he wasn’t alone in those times. While his hands would shake, Jeremy would grip them with his own and lessen the trembles. He’d wipe away his tears and tell him that it would soon pass. He would say that he would be okay, and that he would be here for him, always.

Except in this moment, he isn’t. Michael is alone and sobbing into his sweatshirt as the chill from the porcelain bathtub seeps into him.

It’s quiet and somewhere in the back of his panic-stricken mind he finds this odd. He’s at a party with loud music and equally loud people, which he should be able to hear from the other side of the door. He can make out one sound, though, and as he focuses on it, he realizes that it’s his name he hears.

Michael? Michael!

It sounds like -

“Jeremy!” he gasps, sitting up from the bed he’s in.

Bed. He’s in a bed, not in a bathroom sobbing. After rubbing a hand over his face, he quickly realizes he actually is crying.

He jumps when a hand lands on his shoulder.

“Are you okay? You were crying in your sleep…” Jeremy says.

Michael glances at him and sees the concern written all over his face. He looks away and responds, “Yeah, it was just a bad dream, which you could probably tell. It’s no big deal.”

He doesn’t say anything else and goes to lay back down when Jeremy’s response stops him.

“What was it about?”

He sits up fully and debates for a second. Should he tell him? He doesn’t want to keep anything from Jeremy, but he doesn’t want to make him feel guilty.

He can’t meet Jeremy’s eyes as he says, “It was about that night…”

“That night?”

“Yeah, at the party. In the bathroom. After you — I was panicking; you were gone and — yeah. That night.”

There’s a beat of silence, no one moving, until he suddenly feels arms around him and Jeremy’s face pressed against his back.

“I’m here now,” he hears Jeremy say, muffled slightly.

Michael feels a spark of anger or worry or something, and he puts his head in his hands, causing his voice to come out muffled too.

“But for how long? What if something happens and you leave me again? I don’t — I don’t know what I would do.” he admits.

Jeremy holds him tighter and stays quiet. It isn’t until Michael hears a sniffle that he realizes that Jeremy is crying.

“Jeremy, are you…are you crying? Why are you crying? What did I do?”

“That’s just it, Michael. You didn’t do anything.” Jeremy’s voice becomes more frantic. “I did. I messed up. I called you a loser and left you there. Who does that to the person they care about? I love you and yet here I am, the reason you’re having nightmares and crying in your sleep. I don’t know if I can ever forgive my-”

“Jeremy, Jeremy. I love you, too.”

Jeremy only holds on tighter and sobs.

_______

Sunlight streams through the slit of Jeremy’s bedroom window curtains, warming Michael as he wakes up.

The first thing he sees is Jeremy, eyes closed and lying curled up close to him. His breathing is even and his face looks impossibly peaceful. Michael can’t help but trace a finger along the edge of his face lightly, taking in the sight.

It’s not long before Jeremy begins stirring, eyes slowly opening and looking at Michael.

“So…what’s, uh, up?”

Michael laughs softly at Jeremy’s usual awkward nature, but quickly turns serious when he looks Jeremy in the eyes and says, “I meant it, what I said. I love you, too.”

“Even after I ignored you?”

“I love you.”

“Even after I called you a loser?”

“I love you.”

“Even after I -”

Michael doesn’t let him finish as he cuts him off with a quick, soft kiss.

“It might still hurt when I think of it all, but I know you aren’t the same person then, and that it wasn’t even really you. I know you’re sorry. And I forgive you because I love you.”

Jeremy looks like he’s about to start crying, but he’s smiling and grabbing Michael’s hand, threading their fingers together.

“I love you, too.”

They’re both smiling at each other now, teary eyed and sleepy in the late morning sun. Michael feels a warmth spreading throughout his body, and everything feels okay. He knows Jeremy isn’t going to leave him again. He’s not alone.

2

Word count: 959


 You were very careful. You and your husband always used protection before you start with the pills. Those stupid pills. Eric didn’t want any kids. Maybe in four or five years, you could convince him, but right now? No way.

 You move slowly, getting up from the bed without waking him up. Grabbing a coat, you leave the apartment in tears. He’ll probably be mad, or even divorce you. Right? But Eric loves you. He does, you’re sure. But there’s no way to guess his reaction.

 “(Y/N)?” Someone screams from behind you, the voice echoing through the empty corridor. But you keep walking, trying not to cry too loud.

 “(Y/N), wait! What happened? ” You recognize Four’s voice and stop. You wait for him to come closer and just hug him tightly. “Hey, don’t cry. Tell me what happened. Did Eric hurt you?”

 “No, no. Four, I… Shit! How am I gonna tell him? He doesn’t want kids!”

 “(Y/N), are you pregnant?” He seems happy for you, and for that, you almost kick him in the balls.

 “Yes, I am!” You push him violently, waving your hands in the air. “Isn’t this obvious? Why are you so idiot?”

 “Calm down. Come, let’s get you some water.” Four takes your hand, but you step away from him again.

 “I don’t want water!”

 “(Y/N), please. You have a baby inside you now. Try not to freak out yet.”

“My baby! Eric won’t help me with him! Oh my God! What am I gonna do? Raise a kid on my own?” You lose control, crying and pushing Four away when he tries to calm you down. Again. Trying to hold back more tears, you sit on the cold floor. No way you could handle with a baby alone, you have no idea how to do it. “I’m gonna be a single mother! I can’t even take care of myself! You know it, I…”

 “(Y/N), stop talking. Right now.” He kneels before you. “We’re friends, aren’t we? I’ll help you tell Eric. You’ve been married for a year now, I’m sure everything will be fine”

 “Oh my God, Four, aren’t you listening? He. Doesn’t. Want. Kids.” You get up suddenly and Four does the same.

 “Can you please stop talking?” Four caress your cheek. He has always been a good friend, your best friend actually. As usual, he makes you feel like it’s not the end of the world. “I need you to calm down and listen, okay?”

 “Okay.” You murmur.

 “I will help you talk to him. And if he leaves you or something I’ll help take care of the child.”

 “No, I can’t ask you that. It’s not your child.” Breathing deeply, you start to walk down the hall, God knows where.

 “You didn’t ask me. You’re like a sister to me and my nephew or niece can’t grow up without a father.” Four touches your belly, making you stop. “We’ll talk to him tomorrow. I’ll go to your apartment before breakfast. ”

 “Okay.” You sigh, taking the best chance you have now. “See ya tomorrow.”

 “I’ll walk with you, just in case you feel sick.”

 “Thanks again, Four.”



 “(Y/N), tell my why the hell Four is in my living room, would you?” Eric screams, and you run out the bathroom, still brushing your hair.

 “Eric, uhm, we need to talk to you.”

 “Let me see if I get this.” Eric sits on the couch, his eyes locked on Four. This hate between them pisses you off more than almost anything. Staying right in the middle while your best friend and your husband try to kill each other isn’t the funniest thing in the world. “You, my wife, and Four, a pain in the ass, need to talk to me.”

 “Yes. It’s something really important. ”

 “Fine. Why aren’t you speaking about it then?”

 You stare at Four, trying to make him understand that you want him to talk. The words are stuck in your throat, and tears start to roll down your cheeks again. Plus, Eric is getting really worried about this weird situation.

 “Eric, (Y/N) is pregnant.”

 Four speaks in a low voice. Within seconds, Eric is standing before your friend, anger, and disappointment in his eyes. You don’t have any idea of what is going on right now.

 “My woman is pregnant. How dare you touch her?”

 “NO! ERIC!” Your heart skips a beat. The ex-Erudite just got it all wrong. “Slow down! Are you mad? The baby is yours, you idiot!” You yell, watching his expression change from fury to… genuine happiness. He walks up to you, kneeling to softly kiss your belly. “Eric, what are you doing?”

 “What do you think? I’m talking to my child.” His voice is so kind that you can’t help but smile.

 “But I thought you didn’t want kids.”

 “It’s my baby. Our baby. I already love him and I love you.” He stands up, kissing your lips.

 “Now that everything is perfect again, I’ll go have my breakfast.” Four waves at you, and you whisper a ‘thank you’. “And the baby will be my nephew. Or niece.”

 “What? No!”

 “C'mom, Eric. Pleeeease.” You make puppy eyes at him. “Four just helped me to tell you and if he didn’t find me yesterday night I don’t even know where I’d be now! He’s a very good friend.”

 “Fine, fine. Just don’t expect me to say thank you.” He makes a pause, staring at you before turning to face Four. “Even though I am thankful that you were there for her.”

 “No need. See you later, (Y/N).” Four leaves you alone with a very happy Eric.

 “So…”

 “I love you, Eric.” You say, jumping into his arms.

 “I love you more, beautiful.”

Ok, nobody likes Melody and we are glad the whole “Hide your Nathaniel route from her” is over.

But I felt so bad for her in this episode because while it’s true that she has a talent for denying evidence, Nat was never 100% honest with her. She said it herself: “He always told me he was not ready for a relationship”.

He was not ready for a relationship.

Clearly she is a overreacting person, but I don’t think I would have been much different if a guy I had had a crush on for a long time told me he didn’t want to get serious and then got totally serious with one of my best friends.

Truth to be told, I am sure I would have reacted the same because this actually happened to me. And it’s honestly heartbreaking and mindblowing. You feel betrayed and just cannot believe they did this to you. You cannot believe it, even if you try.

I don’t like Melody all that much, but her crying face made me sad. I don’t understand how people could find it enjoyable to watch…

2

Gina Torres Spinoff to be Introduced in SUITS Season 7 Finale!!!!
It’s official: USA Network is moving ahead with a potential Suits spinoff starring Gina Torres.

The NBCUniversal-owned cable network Wednesday confirmed that the backdoor pilot will air as the Aaron Korsh-created procedural’s season seven finale and is slated to air in the first quarter of 2018.

The episode will reunite Harvey Specter (Gabriel Macht), Mike Ross (Patrick J. Adams), Louis Litt (Rick Hoffman), Donna Paulsen (Sarah Rafferty) and Rachel Zane (Meghan Markle) with their old friend Jessica Pearson (Torres) as she adjusts to her new life in the Windy City. When she is forced to enter the dirty world of Chicago politics, Pearson must rely on her legal wits and valiant relationships from Pearson Specter Litt to navigate this unknown territory.

Suits creator Korsh will pen the script alongside longtime exec producer Daniel Arkin. Anton Cropper (Suits, House of Lies, Black-ish) will direct the pilot, which like the flagship is exec produced by Universal Cable Productions and Hypnotic’s Doug Liman, David Bartis and Gene Klein.

“The powerhouse character of Jessica Pearson, expertly brought to life by the incomparable Gina Torres, has won the hearts of television fans everywhere,” said Chris McCumber, president of entertainment networks at NBCUniversal Cable Entertainment. "USA Network is beyond thrilled to work with Gina, Aaron Korsh, the entire Suits producing team and our partners at UCP to explore the exciting next phase of Jessica’s story.”

Torres, who left Suits midway through season six, returned in the season six finale. In the time since she was a regular on USA Network’s longest-running original, she booked a recurring role on ABC’s since-canceled Shondaland drama The Catch and she was set to star in The Death of Eva Sofia Valdez, an ABC drama pilot that did not move forward.

“Gina Torres is a terrific actress and a valued member of our family,” said Jeff Wachtel, chief content officer at NBCUniversal Cable Entertainment and UCP president. “Gina and Aaron have created a truly memorable character in Jessica Pearson, and we felt we owed it to the audience — and ourselves! — to follow her journey beyond the original show.”

The official confirmation of the untitled spinoff pilot pickup comes six months after news first leaked that UCP was exploring a potential spinoff with Torres, though at the time USA Network had not yet heard the pitch despite being the natural home for the drama.

Torres is repped by Domain, Framework Entertainment and Shreck Rose.

“[Torres] had an idea and went to the studio and sort of discussed with them … It wasn’t a vague idea but it was a broader idea. They came to me, asked me what I thought. Obviously I love Jessica, I’m interested in seeing what’s happening with her in the future, and we decided to pursue it,” Korsh told THR in March after the season six finale.