When I was just beginning to use tumblr regularly I remember once I actually responded in earnest to one of those posts that was like “I don’t under monosexuals- how are they only attracted to one gender, what about if you’re attracted to a stranger and then find out they don’t identify as a woman?”
And like I went into all this detail about how orientation is based in gender perception and attraction can end abruptly once you perceive someone correctly- like how if you thought someone was attractive and then discovered they were related to you somehow, you’d stop being attracted as soon as you realized because your attraction was based in a false perception, & it’s not that complicated, everyone has groups of people they’re not attracted to, it’s not like bi and pan folks are attracted to everyone so just picture folks you know you’re not attracted to and you’ll get it, yadda yadda
Like genuinely I wrote this whole thing explaining being attracted to only one gender and how attraction functioned etc. I went into it in completely good faith.
And like nowadays I just have ‘monosexual’ blacklisted cause 99/100 times someone uses it they are really saying “lesbians are so regressive and closed minded, it doesn’t make sense at all as an identity, it’s outdated and has no place anymore” or “lesbians are inherently transphobic (because apparently believing trans women can’t be lesbians and believing only bi/pan people could be into trans folks *isnt* super transphobic??)”
I was so innocent and optimistic. It kind of makes me sad that so few questions on here *are* asked in good faith instead of asked as a rhetorical device to promote lateral aggression between folks. It’s a genuinely hostile space a lot of the time.
I love all my mutuals for all the good and thoughtful and positive discussions and learning experiences I’ve had, but damn I can see why Tumblr just is not a fun place for a lot of folks. It’s a crash course in being on guard for malicious subtext 24/7.