how can a person be hot as an android and as a human

To Make a Soldier Blush

Pairing: Bucky Barnes X Reader

Summary: You’re a new avenger and you have your own mission to accomplish: making Bucky Barnes blush everytime you see him.

Warnings: I don’t know, forward reader maybe?, shy Bucky, violence. 

Words Count: 2.8k (ish)

A/N: This is my submission for Bee’s 2.1k challenge from @amarvelouswritings (thank you for also being the beta for this Bee, I love you to death). I got prompt 14- “Well, geez, if you don’t like what I’m wearing, I can go and change.” English is not my first language, so excuse any mistakes.

It was hard for you to focus on the projected figure of a giant rotten alien grape that apparently was the one of the possible newest threats to the universe. The reason of your disregarded distraction? How fuckable the group of super-heroes sitting with you around the table was.

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Yep, another picspam review. I mean, with this episode, how could I not? I was broken for a full two days, so of course it warrants me repeatedly smashing my face into the keyboard… which is pretty much what this entire post is. Face smashes and screencaps. (And boy howdy, do I mean screencaps. There’s a LOT. *rolls around in all of the caps*)

I actually did not have all that much time to get online yesterday, so this time around I don’t believe I’ll be unintentionally quoting any of you guys. \o/

First, I will share this… I get my legal digital copies from Google Play (I have Android everything, including a fucking television that’s running Android… of course I use Google Play and also ‘cuz fuck a whole lot iTunes). Someone at Google knows exactly what they’re doing because THIS is the picture they decided to use as the thumbnail of this episode. And I am DYING because this exact moment is when Cas says, “get out” and Sam is just staring like, “omg mental note do not fuck with Cas right now.”

Yah, that’s perfect. YOCKEY: I am Cas. Get the fuck out, you broke me. I am also Sam. I cannot believe you just did that jesus fuck.

(Side note: that picture is taken with my Android phone of my Android TV.)

That said.

Number of Obligatory Dean Wall Slams: TWOOOOO!!! Yockey, you speak to my heart.

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if you’re ready, ch 1 (a klance fic)

words: 2.2k
read it on AO3!

“Why was I wearing a wedding veil?” Lance asks, eyes narrowing in confusion.

“Oh wait..wait, shit! Shit! Did I marry a hot babe last night? Talk about a wild birthday!” Lance crows, waving his arms with glee.

“No,” says Keith. “You married me.”

In which the paladins visit Las Vegas for Lance’s 21st birthday, Keith and Lance get married, Allura goes missing, Pidge gets arrested, and Shiro goes to the spa.

a/n: I have no explanation for this other than the fact that I was listening to Marry You by Bruno Mars on the radio and this idea struck me like a bolt of lightning. And it’s going to be a wild ride, friends. Enjoy!

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Don’t You Try To Run Right Now

aka five times Mick Rory had to save Len Snart’s ass before he made a terrible decision about who to fuck, and one time he didn’t, in roughly chronological order.

aka what happens when @wacheypena and I agree that it looks like Len and Malcolm/Went and John are flirting in a gifset and everything spirals from there

1.    David Singh

They’ve made a habit of heading out to Saints and Sinners (the local dive bar) on Friday nights, in order that they can get drunk and find people to hook up with, in a rare show of humanity on Lenny’s part. Honestly, Mick’s begun to wonder whether Lenny’s just some kind of particularly pretty futuristic android. Usually Lenny sits and drinks until his hand gestures get more extravagant and he walks the block home with a wobble, and Mick watches Lenny until he’s inside the lobby of their crappy apartment building and leaves with some sweet little thing. Tonight, however, Lenny’s got his eye on some square-looking guy at the bar. Mick’s got to admit, Lenny has good taste – the man is certainly attractive – but there’s a major factor that makes him a no go.

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taekook rec: march 2017

if this is what you want, i’ll get closer to you by bambambams (phanjessmagoria)

“You’re almost exactly how you seemed, hyung.”

Taehyung laughed, slinging an arm over Jungkook’s shoulders and tugging him close. Perhaps it was too intimate a gesture for the two of them, since they weren’t actually friends, but they’d known each other for the months they’d been taking dance classes together, so Jungkook didn’t shrug it off. “Then, should we get to know each other a bit better, Jungkook-ah?”

feel it coming by aeterisks

When Taehyung phoned the plumber he wasn’t expecting to have the embodiment of hot sent to his home, but he’s not about to complain.

(Or, Jeongguk is a plumber and Taehyung gets much more than his shower fixed.)

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Almost Human!AU

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 |

  • Leonard hates androids. All of them, in all their shapes, sizes and functions. Doesn’t trust them. But somehow, in the two years he’s been off-duty to deal with his wife and daughter disappearing, and an accident that left him with a synthetic leg, it has become mandatory for anyone in the police force to be accompanied by a robot. Spock is the main supplier of those, and he walks Leonard down further into the lab. “I have a J.I.M available for you,” Spock says, and Leonard raises his eyebrows. “Isn’t that the recalled sex ‘bot? What am I gonna do with that? They were insane.” “Their purpose was to use their bodies to gain intel on potential threats, yes,” Spock says. He pulls out one of the models, still deactivated, and carries it to a special chair. “But they were recalled because they went batshit crazy,” Leonard says, “you’re giving me one of the crazy ones.” “Crazy is a hurtful expression,” Spock says, wiring the android up to his computer, “they are fully equipped with a synthetic soul, and this one is reprogrammed to be an excellent police officer.” “Great,” Leonard says, though heavily sarcastic. Spock activates him, and Leonard stares down at unnatural blue eyes coming to life. “Jim,” Spock says, resting his hand on Jim’s shoulder, “meet detective McCoy. McCoy, this is Jim. Now, Jim’s previous… occupation shouldn’t be triggered, but there may be a few glitches.“ “Glitches?” Leonard asks, immediately alarmed. “what kind of glitches?”
  • Jim is continuously clacking his tongue during the drive back to the precinct. Leonard is getting increasingly more annoyed, and he tightens his fingers around the steering wheel. “Can you just…” Leonard says, gritting his teeth, before finally sighing and turning to look at Jim, “synthetic: off.” “Synthetic: off,” Jim repeats, rolling it over his tongue a couple of times, “is that your way of telling me to shut up?” “Yes,” Leonard says, and Jim raises his eyebrows. “Rude. I’m not a fan of that word.” “Synthetic?” “Yeah.” “You want me to call you something else than synthetic?” “Preferably,” Jim says, “you’ve said it two more times since I asked you not to.” “Synthetic?” Leonard asks, and Jim glances in his direction. “You’re doing this on purpose.“ Leonard throws him a small smirk. “Relax, it’s not like you should be feeling anything.” “Spock informed you of my synthetic soul, right? I am designed to feel and experience just as much as you,” Jim explains. “But how do you know if you feel as much? You’re a robot,” Leonard says, “all your feelings are artificial.” Jim’s eyes narrow, and Leonard watches him grit his teeth a little. “Human,” Jim starts, throwing Leonard an annoyed smile, “off.
  • Their first assigned task together ends in an artificial blood bath, because someone is hacking into Androids to turn them into weapons against humans. Most general police model Androids are compromised, but Jim enters the field anyway. He’s on Leonard’s side, providing him cover, and dragging him out of the line of fire when Leonard is knocked out by one of the other androids. Leonard feels quite disorientated when he wakes up, and Jim is hovering above him. Blue eyes piercing his own and Leonard feels like his privacy is being invaded just looking at Jim. “What are you doing?” Leonard groans. “I’m going to overwrite the androids,” Jim says, “I need you to cover me, because I will be temporarily immobilized when I do this. Can you do that?” “Of course I can do that,” Leonard says with a frown. He takes over Jim’s gun, and provides him cover for all the androids that are charging at them with full speed. When Jim successfully overwrites their program, they all crumple to the ground. The two of them catch the guy responsible not much later. “You did well,” Leonard says eventually, and Jim throws him a small smile. “Was that a compliment?” “Take it as you wish,” Leonard says, “it doesn’t mean we’re friends. But we’re gonna celebrate with a drink.” “I don’t drink,” Jim says, watching Leonard put his coat back on. “Perfect,” Leonard replies, “in that case: I’m paying.”
  • And everything goes well, Jim and Bones work surprisingly well together despite the fact that Jim’s an android, and Leonard is convinced he’s programmed to counter literally everything Leonard says. Spock assures him that’s part of his synthetic soul that shapes his “character”. But then they investigate a death in an upperclass brothel, and Jim gets distracted by the sex ‘bots. Not because he’s interested in them, as Leonard initially expects, but because he can relate to them and their work. Jim speaks to one of the girls for the longest time, and Leonard lets him - even though he doesn’t really like the way she touches his arm and smiles at the things he’s saying. “Are you coming?” Leonard asks, nudging Jim’s side. “Or are you gonna go stare into each other’s eyes exchanging data all day? Let me know if I should book a room.” Jim huffs at that, and turns around. “Let’s go,” he says, patting Leonard’s shoulder as they walk out. “I noticed you fancied her, though,” he adds, and Leonard raises an eyebrow. “Excuse me? I did not.” “I noticed an increase in your pulse,” Jim says. Leonard scoffs. “She ain’t my type.” “What is your type?” Jim asks curiously. Leonard doesn’t even have a proper answer for that. Blond, blue eyes, and confident. But he can’t really say that without boosting Jim’s ego too much, so instead he shrugs, and says: “Alive.” Jim slows his walking,  glancing at Leonard’s back as he walks away. “Rude. You’re such a dick.”
  • The ride back to the precinct is quieter, Jim keeps his thoughts to himself and Leonard is grateful for that. Until Jim turns to look at Leonard, and goes: “Your pulse is still faster than usual.” “So?” “Logically, that means you’re either angry- or you fancy me.” “I wonder which one of those two is the correct one,” Leonard says, sarcasm heavy in his voice, but Jim smiles. “Me, too.” “I obviously don’t fancy you.” Leonard says, and Jim laughs. “Sure.” “But I am curious,” Leonard starts, “do you have anything… down there? Or are you like a Ken doll?” “Of course I have something down there,” Jim says, “my design was originally aimed for the sex industry. A lot of thought went into designing my-” “Okay, I get it.” “Here, I’ll show you,” Jim says, and Leonard frowns because initially, he doesn’t understand. But then he looks over at Jim, and Jim has pushed his pants down, and Leonard clears his throat. “Jesus, Jim. Put that thing away! Is that all for one person?” “It was modeled after the ideal length, width…” “Yes, okay. I got it,” Leonard says, and Jim just grins. “Your pulse is racing again.” “Shut up.”
  • Jim lives with the MX model androids, and generally that is fine. They’re not programmed to show emotion or anything, but Jim doesn’t need it when he’s not in human presence. But a malfunction in the system leaves only a few charging stables online, and Jim gets the last priority to charge. Which also means that come morning, he’s running on half a charge. He’s grumpy enough to match Leonard’s mood when they run into each other in the office. “You ready to solve another murder?” Leonard asks, “spontaneous human combustion. I’m not even making that up.” “You’re way too happy that we’re taking on a murder case,” Jim counters, and Leonard raises an eyebrow. “You okay?” “No. I am running on 49% because your boss thinks MX’s are more important than me.” “What?” “There was a charging malfunctioning in our place. I wanna move out. I’m gonna move in with you, Bones.” “You’re not moving in with me,” Leonard huffs. “Come on, you have a trophy room you literally never enter. I could just install a charging there, you wouldn’t even know I was there.” “Listen, darling, you’re not moving in with me,” Leonard says firmly. 
  • “Do you want to keep those trophies?” Jim asks, carrying out a box of Leonard’s high school achievements. “You were quite an athlete, huh?” “Yeah,” Leonard says, grabbing that very box from Jim’s hands, “that was until I lost my leg.” “These are all high school and college trophies,” Jim says, “you didn’t lose your leg ‘til two years ago.” “Stop researching me all the time,” Leonard groans, running a hand through his hair, “how charged are you?” “28%,” Jim says, “my charging station should be finished in two hours.” “Can you last that long?” Leonard asks, and Jim shrugs. “So long as we don’t have to do anything in that time.” But they’re not that lucky, because just ten minutes later they get another emergency call.
  • Jim performs okay, as usual, but when his charge goes below 10%, he starts getting sluggish. Several of his functions shut down and Jim becomes even grumpier and aggressive, which is ridiculous considering they’re just researching a homicide case. “Can you stop,” Leonard says, “power down, or something. I can better do this alone. Synthetic: off.” “Shut the fuck up, Leonard,” Jim counters, “I can help.”
  • “Alright,” Leonard sighs, getting up from his seat, “I’m taking you to Spock. Surely he has a way for you to charge.” Jim gets up as well, grabbing Leonard’s arm and pulling him in closer. It’s so sudden Leonard doesn’t even know what’s happening until Jim presses his lips against his own. With surprising force, too, pressing Leonard against the wall and sliding his hands under his shirt. “Jesus–Jim,” Leonard breathes out, tilting his face away to feel Jim’s lips run over his jaw and his neck instead. “What are you-” “Is this human enough for you?” Jim asks, and Leonard shivers when he feels hot breath against his ear. “Jim-” “Your heart is racing,” Jim says, and Leonard closes his eyes, finally shoving Jim backwards. “What is wrong with you?" Jim looks a little lost at Leonard, and then just leans in again. "I’m only here to serve you. I can show you a good time.” He says, and Leonard sighs, rubbing his temples and taking a deep breath to focus. “You wanna serve me?” “Yes.” “Follow me,” Leonard says, grabbing Jim’s hand and ignoring that odd smile on the other’s lips as he follows Leonard. 
  • When they’re in Spock’s basement, Jim’s eyes narrow. “You tricked me.” “You said you wanted to serve me. I’m telling you what to do. Go lie down and charge,” Leonard says, handing Jim over to Spock. “I’ll see you in a few hours when your sex-bot program isn’t triggered.”
  • "I’m sorry,” Jim tells Leonard when he gets home. Leonard catches him staring as he’s walking around the house in a tank top and shorts, clearly revealing Leonards synthetic leg. “You’re not staring at me because that sex bot thing is still running, are you?” he asks, pointing the beer bottle in his hand in Jim’s direction as he sits down on his couch, rubbing his leg a little in annoyance. “No,” Jim says, “I promise. I’m sorry about what happened, okay? That’s not me. I’m not usually that desperate for human contact.” He sits down on the couch next to Leonard, and turns to him with the familiar smile Leonard has learned to love. “Thank you for still letting me live here with you.” “Well,” Leonard says, leaning back and turning on the TV, “we all make mistakes.” “I promise it won’t happen again.” “I’m talking about me. Letting you live here,” Leonard says, and he’s grinning at the TV as he speaks. Jim huffs, leaning back and relaxing a little, too. “Just for the record,” Leonard continues, finally turning to watch Jim instead of the screen, “you might not be human, and I know I said I liked my partners breathing, but you should know. You are… human enough.” It comes out of him almost unnaturally, because Leonard usually shows affection by insulting Jim. Jim gets it, though, and he throws Leonard a grin. “So you do fancy me,” he says, and Leonard shrugs. He leans in, and Jim shuts his eyes when lips brush over his jaw. And when Jim turns his head just enough so they can kiss, it feels so much better than a few hours before. Natural, and slow, like they’ve kissed a million times before. And Jim doesn’t breathe, but he still looks breathless when Leonard finally pulls away. He looks just as bad, through heavy eyes and a cocky little smirk. “Maybe I fancy you a little.”

anonymous asked:

I just saw the gif of Ignis and I couldn't help but imagine coming home from work and your Ig-NIS greeting you with that smirk...

gif in question!

“I’m home!” you announce to your dim apartment after a long day at the office. The silence that stretches while you take off your boots and shake the moisture off your umbrella worries you just a bit; what if he was out in this awful weather?

You were still not done with stitching the silicon on his left shoulder, if his silk dress shirt got wet under the rain, it will definitely leak into his inner workings!

Aaah… If only you texted him to skip getting the scheduled groceries today!

Thankfully, you don’t have long to simmer in your thoughts, your beloved android was in the kitchen leaning over the stove. The monotone tapping of his house slipper on the floor matches the ticking of your wristwatch exactly. The sound  stops with the sudden straightening of his spine; he turns the flame off and picks the frying pan off the hot stove.

The whole house was unlit, he must have forgot to turn on the lights and somehow managed to cook through the night vision filter. Your human eyes only see with the help of what little moonlight leaks through the window, the outline of your housemate looks like artwork.

And oh boy he was a work of art indeed.

“Hi Iggy.” You greet him with a shy smile, the unfamiliar nickname tastes sweet in your mouth.

“Oh how wonderful, you’re back safely.” He turns his head until he finds you with his good ocular orb and makes a strange face, like a cat that finally caught the mouse. It makes your whole face tingle. “Guess what I learned tonight?”

You pause to swallow around the sudden lurch of your heart, you were still not used to being the main focus of this gorgeous creature’s attention. “What?”

He sets whatever was in the pan onto a plate and turns to approach you. His hip clicks with every step, you make a mental note to get that oiled within the week.

The mysterious smirk on his face remains, his prominent cupid’s bow gleams under the wan lights filtering through the blinds. “But first, a riddle.”

“Okay.” You chuckle, bashful and overwhelmed by his proximity. Ignis had been in your life for a over a year now, but this was the first week he spends with functioning legs and he hasn’t yet installed any scripts to calculate personal space.  

He’s supposed to smell like engine oil and lubricant from this proximity, but this beautiful machine smells like your detergent and kettier ginger.

He takes another step closer, his hip clicks, the height difference cranes your head back to meet his eye but all you can see is the cut on his lower lip that needs gluing.

“What is ham but isn’t always pork, burgundy but not always red, changes shape and material yet still called the same name everywhere?”

Your face grows warm but you push forward, intrigued by whatever update brought on this sudden playful mode. “I dunno… What?”

“Hamburgers!” he chimes, the suggestive smirk blossoms into a satisfied smile. “Do you get it?”

Your laugh only makes the attractive pull on his lips stretch further, flashing brilliant white teeth. “Where did you learn that one?”

“Prompto relayed it to me fourteen hours ago, said his user was so pleased with the humor that she laughed herself to tears.” he searches your face for moisture, “I’m relieved you are not crying, at least.” 

The lights suddenly come on all at once, in the kitchen, the living room, reflecting off his protective visor. It blinds you into squinting your eyes shut and reaching out for balance, your searching hand finds his velvety fingers and hold tight.

Your lips curl around the word ‘what’ but before you could say anything, Ignis answers as if he’d read your very thoughts. “The electricity had been down for a few hours. The whole building is offline, did you not notice?”

“Oh… No, not really.” come to think of it, the stairwell was dimly lit -emergency lights, no doubt- and the hallway was badly illuminated as well… 

It dawns on you how excited you were to come back home for a change… Also, for the first time since you moved out of the countryside you call the little apartment ‘home’…

When you can see again, he is smiling lovingly at your scrunched up face; another kind of blinding brightness. “The homesteading website suggested I use up all the ground meat in the fridge to keep from expiring. So I made Crown-City style hamburgers!” he gestures to the sunny side up eggs sitting on top of thick juicy patties of mince meat, all in a nest of cabbage and sauce.

“Hamburgers…” Stunned, you look up at him again, all bright and proud and eager for validation. “How did you know they’re my favorite!?”

“They are?!” he opens the oven to pull out the other five hamburgers that’d been warming inside. “Enough to eat five servings, I hope?”

The True Love Survey

Warnings: Smut but I use page breakers to mark where it is so you can scroll past it. You’ll know which ones they are. There are also a lot of mentions of smut. The rest is just fluff :)

Summary: One night the whole team is bored in the tower with nothing to do and Vision decides to test out this survey he made and claims that it can make any two people fall in love. So he makes you and Pietro try it because you two barely know each other and the team anxiously awaits the results from outside your bedroom door while they discuss the ships that fangirls have for them on the internet. 

A/N: This is an idea I came up with while I was in Europe. I was thinking about this idea before when I saw an episode of the Big Bang Theory where they found this survey that apparently could make any two people fall in love. So I thought it would be cool to write that in a fic where Bruce comes up with the survey and tests it out on Pietro and you. I also threw in a lot of Pietro headcanons in there and some stuff about the other Avengers.

It was a boring summer night at the tower. You and the team had literally nothing to do and you refused to let Tony throw another party. There had been way too many of those and it had become too common of an occurrence and a form of entertainment that was becoming extremely overused. But you had all also had your fill of Netflix and there was nothing good on TV. There was literally nothing to do! Bruce came back from his lab tapping away on his iPad when he looked up and saw you all sitting around bored. “What are you guys doing?” He asks.

“Nothing.” Tony groans and tilts his head back on the couch.

“There’s nothing on TV?” Bruce asks. 

“We’ve flipped through every channel.” You groan and roll over on the couch so you’re facing him. “And is it just me or is it getting hot in here?” 

Everyone groans. “Curse this Midguardian summer heat and lack of reliable air conditioning!” Thor bellows. 

“Why can’t Tony fix it?” Bruce suggests. 

“Hey I told you guys air conditioners were the one thing I could never figure out! I don’t want to risk breaking the thing more!” Tony states. 

“Well you have to do something!” Nat groans and Tony sighs. 

“Okay fine I’ll go and give it a look but if it breaks even more I’m blaming all of you.” Tony says and leaves to go fix the unit. 

“Now what can the rest of us do?” Wanda asks. 

“Well I have a suggestion.” Vision answers. 

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Mondo Oowada Takes Delicate Electronics Into The Sauna, Because He's A Moron

I accidentally perhaps wrote a fanfiction. It seemed super important to do at the time. I can’t wait for the morning when i find out it’s not.

non-despair AU, amongst other things. But that would ruin the surprise.

[Part 1] (you are here!)
[Part 2]
[Part 3]
[Part 4]
[Part 5]
[Part 6]

starring Kiyotaka Ishimaru and Mondo Oowada
~2700 words

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anonymous asked:

You dug yourself a hole there nyahahaha(?) Since you like nearly every pairing — Jikook + Robot!AU

metal now (but i’ve always been) (insp)
jimin/jeongguk, 1.9k, android!jeongguk + scientist!jimin

jimin didn’t know why people always said robots were cold and unfeeling. sometimes, jeongguk became so flustered that jimin could hear the gears inside of him whir from across the room, and his synthetic skin heated up so much he became burning hot to the touch, the lights on his body beginning to flicker and glow.

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the-bitch-to-your-jerk’s top destiel fics

DISCLAIMER: I don’t read smut, so few of these have any. And if they do, I didn’t read it so be warned

Heartstrings and Hands by poison rain 

[this work has been deleted; link is to the podfic by Tenoko1]
Summary: In which formerly blind Dean meets deaf Cas, and they forge a language of their own…
Length: 21 minutes
Tags: High School AU; Dean Winchester/Castiel, Sign language

never regret thy fall by boykingdom

Summary: Dean Winchester doesn’t do poetry.
Length: 2,031 words
Tags: Canon verse; Fluff, Love Confessions, Mythology-Freeform

So Honey Now by youaresunlight

Summary: But Dean is also very much his opposite, in how he waves his arms and makes his presence known. Cas doesn’t takes up a lot of space, because he’d rather not stand out if he can help it. Then again, it might be impossible for people to not notice someone like Dean. Not with his smile that’s so, so bright and freckles like stars that shine during the day.
Length: 2,805 words
Tags: Alternate Universe- Summer Camp; Fluff, Light Angst, Kid!fic

Mission Fake Fiancé by lesser_evil

Summary: Dean Winchester is a struggling, dirt poor artist and Castiel Novak is a rich and famous author living in the apartment across from him. They hate each other, but when Cas offers Dean $1000 to pretend to be his fiance, Dean accepts, and they both find out that maybe they don’t quite hate each other after all.
Length: 19,619 words (est. 19.6k)
Tags: Alternate Universe; Hate to Love, Fake Relationships, Fluff

the earth says ‘hello’ by kaiifayce

Summary: Cas and Dean are roommates. When Cas signs up for a 9AM that he continuously sleeps through, Dean takes a job as his personal alarm clock.
Length: 1,112 words
Tags: Alternate Universe- College/University; Fluff, First Kiss

Shoulder to Shoulder, Hand to Hand by cornelius

Summary: After release of his memoir, the last thing former fighter pilot Castiel wanted was more time in the spotlight. But when a chance comes up to be on a celebrity ballroom dancing competition show, he knows that drawing attention to his cause is more important than his own comfort. Castiel and Dean both want to win for their own reasons, but they’ll have to figure out how to work together, and manage their mutual attraction, if they want to become the new Ballroom Superstars champions.
Length: 58,197 words (58k)
Tags: Alternate Universe- Modern Setting; Dancing, Professional Dancer!Dean, Fighter Pilot!Castiel, Reality TV, Competition, Mentions of homophobia

Life in Pink by youaresunlight

Summary: At just 33 years old, Dean Winchester is one of the most sought-after wedding planners in the city. He’s chased his dream ever since he was a kid and is now on the brink of making partner at his firm. But the wedding that’ll make or break his promotion? Is his best friend Dr. Castiel Novak’s. It’s going to be the event of the season - unlimited budget, no expense spared - and it’s the kind of task that Dean has been waiting for… except he’s hopelessly in love with Cas.
Length: 25,175 words (25k)
Tags: Alternate Universe: Modern Setting; Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Kid!fic, Mutual Pining, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, 
Note: I didn’t actually read the “Explicit Sexual Content” so I can’t speak for the quality of that writing, but the fic is really really super adorable and well developed, so go for it. 

Shakesqueer: A Comedy by ozonecologne

Summary: “I’ve never talked to you before but the teacher just used us as an example for a scenario where we are married” AU.
(Conveniently, a comedy usually ends in marriage.)

Length: 5462 words
Tags: Alternate Universe- High School, Othello- Freeform, Macbeth- Freeform, Henry IV- Freeform, First Kiss, Fluff, Jock!Cas, Rebel!Dean

Start Quoting Shakespeare and We’re Done by pyrebi

Summary: In which Dean has the hots for a librarian named Cas, Cas may or may not have the hots for a mechanic named Dean, and Gabriel joins Sam in the peanut gallery in the hopes that he might just get to do a horizontal tango of his own.
Length: 15,579 words (15.5k)
Tags: Alternate Universe- Human; Romantic Comedy, Misunderstanding, Libraries, Gabriel/Sam Winchester

courage of stars by casfallsinlove

Summary: Wherein Dean (who owns a bookstore) and Cas (an astrophysicist grad student) have been best friends since they were kids, NASA nearly screws things up, and tea is mentioned far too often.
Length: 3683 words
Tags: Alternate Universe- College/University; Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Cas is a grad student, Dean owns a bookstore

Flying by wendyindahouse

Summary: They’re 8 years old when they meet for the first time. Dean is all freckles and introductions and boisterous energy, immediately intrigued by the quiet, sombre boy with the big blue eyes who just moved in next door. When the boy shyly murmurs his name, Dean tests the syllables in his head before shrugging and announcing “Yeah… I’m just gonna go ahead and call you Cas.” Castiel blinks slowly and whispers “Okay.”
The story of two childhood friends and the playground they grew up in.

Length: 1091 words
Tags: Alternate Universe- High School; Childhood Friends, Best Friends, Fluff, Angst, First Kiss

Firsts by Bloodism

Summary: ‘It’s platonic. Okay then. Dean closes his eyes, pictures Scarlett Johansson and closes the space between them.’ Or: Castiel asks Dean to take his first kiss.
Length: 1,635 words
Tags: Canon-verse; First Kiss, Sam walks in on them

The Honey Bee Theories by queentangerine

Summary: In which Dean works for Ellen’s catering company, and over the years continuously runs into Cas at all of his many (many) siblings’ wedding receptions. But Cas, that stupidly cute kid with the blue eyes and honey bee cuff links, just won’t let Dean get away with sneaking food from the buffet. Unless, of course, he shares.
Length: 16,321
Tags: Alternate Universe; Alternate Universe- High School, Alternate Universe- College/University, Fluff, Cute, Slow Build, Pining Dean, Meddlesome Gabriel, Weddings

Twist and Shout by gabriel, standbyme

Summary: What begins as a transforming love between Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak in the summer of 1965 quickly derails into something far more tumultuous when Dean is drafted in the Vietnam War. Though the two both voice their relationship is one where saying goodbye is never a real truth, their story becomes fraught with the tragedy of circumstance.
Length: 97997
Tags: Major Character Death, Alternate Universe- Past, Vietnam War, Angst, Terminal Illness,

the inexhaustible silence of houses by Askance

Summary: Almost two years after the world doesn’t end, Castiel falls from grace—and loses his voice in the process. Before long, he is settling into a loving relationship with Dean. Dean and Castiel fall in love with the strange little house on the end of Swallowtail Drive, and for a little while life is as it should be—sweet, affectionate, and beginning afresh. But more and more Castiel sees and hears things in the house that beg the question of whether or not a place itself can be alive. The walls and rooms seem to shift and grow and breathe, and one night, Dean comes home from a hunt changed in a way that Castiel cannot explain. In the months that follow, their domestic bliss takes turns for the dark and sour, and the confusion of their circumstances will ultimately test everything Castiel knows about the man he loves, and everything he believes to be true.
Length: 31,820
Tags: Canon-verse; Horror, Psychological Trauma, Domestic Abuse; Angst

C-S-T-L by komodobits

Summary: It’s been nineteen years since the beginning of the Last War, and the Alliance Army is losing land faster than it can supply good men to defend it. Their hope is the synthesis of Android Angeles, a series of humanoid machines designed without the capacity to feel, and thus enabling them to be the perfect super soldiers. In order to check their battle suitability, the first prototypes are sent down with a landing party of the men they will later replace, and Sergeant Dean Winchester is paired with Unit 5284-C-S-T-L for the assignment. Cas, as Dean nicknames him, is easy enough to work with - once you get past the emotional vacancy and blatant disregard for human life, that is - but as the squad’s tour goes on, Dean gets to wondering whether the Android Angeles are really as unfeeling as he’s been told.
Length: 90,377 (90.3k)
Tags: Alternate Universe: Post-Nuclear War, Minor Gore, Angst, Situations similar to terminal illness, Androids

Feel free to request more fic recs/give fic recs here or check out my (and @my-aristos-achaion‘s) ao3 here

anonymous asked:

what are your favorite iwaoi fics that you would recommend?

[cracks knuckles] ah yes i was wondering when i’d get this ask. i really need to browse the iwaoi tag for new things, but (at least for me) it’s hard reading work for a ship while i’m writing it. part of the reason is that subconsciously stealing elements of another story is a real concern. anyway, i’m going to list those that i’ve read so far and really enjoyed

to be first, to be best | long oneshot | complete: Hajime is apparently something of a masochist, and as he stares down at the tie-dyed AREA51 T-shirt in his hands, he thinks “I’m totally in love with this asshole, aren’t I?” | note: this is easily my favorite iwaoi fic, at least as of yet. i highly highly recommend it

we can do better than that | long oneshot | complete:  Oikawa and Iwaizumi go on a road trip during the summer after their high school graduation. It doesn’t go as expected, but maybe that’s not such a bad thing after all. | note: first iwaoi fic i ever read! it has a special place in my heart

Build A Temple In Me | long oneshot | complete:  But intertwining of destinies can be ugly business, Hajime finds, when their first meeting begins with blood and the too-human eyes of a beast. | note: ryan is an incredible writer!! i recommend anything by setter-kun​ and this one is exceptionally beautiful 

no room for pretend | long oneshot | complete:  “Iwa-chan,” Oikawa says again, quieter. When Iwaizumi turns his head back around, Oikawa isn’t even looking at him anymore, fixated on the frayed threads of their cushion. He looks up after a moment and smiles faintly. “Please be my fake boyfriend.” | note: i’m a sucker for this trope, and this writer handled it so well

I Choose You | oneshot | complete: There’s a tiny clock on his wrist, bright red numbers. It’s supposed to tick, supposed to move, supposed to tell him when he’ll meet his soulmate. The time will run to zero when they’ve met, moving numbers will become stationary—the ticking that signified uncertainty transforming to the silent stability of forever.Iwaizumi Hajime’s clock hasn’t ticked for as long as he can remember.| note: gotta love the soulmate au’s

Kotov Syndrome | multichap | complete: Corruption is brewing in Seijou’s police force. Oikawa Tooru, the captain of Special Investigations, is put onto a case where he cannot afford to fail.But despite his best efforts, not everything goes according to plan.A standalone fic in the buddycop AU series; reading the other two isn’t necessary if you’d just like to read this one! | note: ren is also fantastic!! aetherdrive​‘s buddycop au’s are phenomenal so check them all out if you get the chance

on lightning, on luster | multichap | ongoing: Maybe it’s because Oikawa is more than something gilded. When Hajime thinks of those seventy-two kilograms of wonder and weight, his one-hundred and eighty-four centimeters, arms outstretched, he knows his best friend’s still learning to tower. Oikawa Tooru. That name of his races through his head like it’s making a rallying tour, a victory tour, honestly, because there’s no doubt about it by now—Hajime wants Oikawa, likes him even, but not because he’s made of myth. Oikawa’s first death might have come by lightning, but Hajime doesn’t seek such flash.Because for all the love Oikawa gets as Miyagi’s golden boy, Hajime will love everything under the luster.Or, a tale in which Iwaizumi Hajime is born into the world with twenty-five lives. His best friend, Oikawa, isn’t quite as lucky. | note: justine is a fabulous writer, too. companions​ has written several other fics that i definitely encourage you to look into 

Hot Pink | multichap | ongoing: Mankind is dying out, thanks to a virus that instantly weakens the immune system. The only way to survive after catching the virus is for ones entire identity to be compressed into data and transferred into an artificial host, an android if you will, but everyone knows these people as Synthetics.Iwaizumi Hajime is a borderline-celebrity in the field in which he is finishing his Masters, Synthetic Humanoid Ethics, when he finally proposes to long-time Synthetic boyfriend Oikawa Tooru. Known nearly worldwide for his stance on Organic and Synthetic human relationships, somehow, he’s upset the wrong person and everything is crashing down on him. He doesn’t know how or why this is happening, but in a world where humans are slowly dying and being replaced by the artificial, Iwaizumi may have an android uprising on his hands. And it may or may not have been something he said. | note: if you enjoy sci-fi like i do, this fic is for you. also, alphie (semi-eita) is an awesome writer!!

It’s Tradition | oneshot | complete:  Every year, without fail, on Oikawa’s birthday, Oikawa has somehow gotten a kiss out of Iwaizumi. | note: super cute and a quick gratifying read

Like One of Your French Girls | oneshot | complete | nsfw:  “I, Oikawa Tooru, captain of the Aobajousai volleyball team and all-around specimen of charm and talent, am completely and 100% a virgin.” | note: really good if you’re looking for iwaoi smut

like i said, i’m sure there are other great fics out there that have been posted  recently. once i finish “it’s lonely on jupiter,” i plan on reading more! i hope this helps and, if you asked this because you’re currently reading my own iwaoi, i hope you continue to enjoy that, too!

Why Gendered Pronouns Are Dumb And Stupid And We Should Kill Them

Okay, a bit more on why I’m so down on gendered pronouns!  


(Source is this weird make-your-own-bingo site.  I don’t know how you would play this game.)

Pronouns are words like heshethemit, etc.  They’re words that take the place of people, so we can say “Ryan sauntered into the beachhouse.  His pecs were so interesting!  He always suspected as much” instead of “Ryan sauntered into the beachhouse.  Ryan’s pecs were so interesting!  Ryan always suspected as much”.  

They are useful when you don’t want to sound like a robot.


A pronoun that tells you what the gender of the person is!  He and she are two of them.  They is genderless, while it suggests (to many people) a lack of humanity, and with it a lack of gender (as distinct from just not having it specified).  One person might get mad if you call them “it”.  Another person might get mad if you call their pets “it”.


Aha, caught me there, didn’t you?  I said “One person might get mad if you call them ‘it’”, and them there is a genderless plural pronoun being used on individual, can’t we use them and they and other versions as gender-free pronouns?  Couldn't their pecs be interesting, even if there’s just one person there?  Because they probably are.  

Interesting, I mean.

(Hugh Jackman’s pecs, found while searching for “cool pecs”) (okay it was a Google Alert for “cool pecs”) (okay it was a Google Alert for “cool pecs +wolverine hopefully??”)

And yeah, we could.  But we don’t.   A lot of style guides recommend “him/her” (and, to make it more equal, making every second one “her/him” to mix it up).  But that’s messy, ugly, hard to say and impossible to say often (“Ryan sauntered into the beachhouse.  His or her pecs were so interesting!  She or he always suspected as much”) and puts us right back to sounding like robots.  Not to mention how it completely breaks down when someone who ISN’T situated in the gender binary has pecs we want to talk about.

I have a book on dog training that randomly chooses “his” or “her” every time a dog pronoun is needed.  I get the idea, but the final result is a quantum dog that changes genders during a single trick.  It’s distracting.  It’s messy.  It’s a crude hack using tools (good ol’ gendered pronouns) that were broken in the first place.  And so pointless!  Nobody cares about these dog’s genders.  The book ITSELF doesn’t even care.  It just wants to teach me how to make my dog lie down and sit pretty but it can’t do that without getting mired down in imaginary dog gender identities.

We can do better.   

And here’s where I get HARDLINE RADICAL: using them a gender-free pronoun is fine and dandy, and inventing new pronouns is great, but I don’t believe we can stop there.  

We need to kill the gendered pronouns.


(A stock photo of a body outline.  I say, could this stock photo be purchased on some manner of online stock photo website?  If only this could be clarified somehow??)

Here’s a sentence:

She had no more choices left.  Except one.  Grinning wildly, she initiated the Omega Device.

Here’s what English says about that sentence:

The most important thing to know about anyone in the world is their gender, and I need to know it the second you tell me about someone.

“She initiated the Omega Device” tells you what I wanted it to (the Omega device has been initiated by someone, and Shit is about to Go Down, Omega-Wise) but it also tells you a woman is doing it.  But no big deal, right?  Who cares if we have to talk about gender when talking about Omega Devices and The People Who Initiate Them?  It adds colour to the scene!  Now everyone can imagine a smokin-hot babe with that Omega Device, instead of a smokin-hot hunk, and rest easy knowing their imagination is correct.  What’s the problem, right?  We’re getting extra information about the scene for free!  

But it’s not!  There’s an opportunity cost.  We could be bake in literally any other fact we can imagine into our languages.  We could have pronouns where, instead of someone’s gender, they told you their mood.  Their bone density.  Heck, we could have pronouns that tell you their HOPES AND DREAMS.  We could live in a world of pronouns that indicate a speaker’s certainty that the person being referred to is ACTUALLY that person, and not a robot duplicate, and we could have a different pronoun to suggest that while the person may not be a robot duplicate, we haven’t entirely ruled out illegal clone.  These are crazy suggestions, but that’s the point: anything is possible in language!  We invented it!  And we can reinvent whatever we want!

He’s me, Ryan.  Man!  Don’t you wish “he” there told you something even marginally more useful than gender identity, like at least my Facebook relationship status?  OH WELL, GUESS YOU’LL NEVER KNOW

And yet we’ve settled on gender.  

And it is settling.  It’s settling for irrelevant, for boring, for pointless.  Is gender really so important to us English speakers that it is, quite literally, all we can talk about?  Kill it.  Kill it, and build a language with pronouns that do better. 

And while we’re at it, let’s not forget to build in a full set of neutral pronouns, pronouns that say “this person or animal or object’s gender/age/android status is irrelevant here, so WHO FRIGGIN’ CARES”.  Because there will be times, I promise, when we won’t want to talk about androids, the same way there are times now where we don’t want to talk about gender, but we’re forced to because that’s the language we’ve settled on.  Settled for.  

And then, finally and at last, we could all stop obsessing about what genders real and imaginary people are like it’s the most important thing in the world.   Because it's really not.

Especially when there could be illegal cloning going on, and the Omega Device has just been initiated.

Song Drabbles - Smut Edition [Various Pairings; Part 1]

Heyyyy so I decided to challenge myself and do a smutty version of the song drabbles I’ve been doing lately. I’m not sure if I’ll do more but they are fun. It’s much much harder to do smut though, because of pacing. Some of these ended too soon for my liking but ah well. c: There are actually *thirteen* drabbles here, not ten.

Pairings included: OnTae, JongYu, OnHo, OnKey, JongKey, MinKey, JongTae, JongHo, OnKai (Yes, Onew/Kai!!)

iPod Shuffle Challenge Rules:
1. Pick a character, pairing, or fandom you like.
2. Turn on your music player and put it on random/shuffle.
3. Write a fic related to each song that plays. You only have the time frame of the song to finish the drabble; you start when the song starts, and stop when it’s over. No lingering afterwards!
4. Do ten of these, and then post them.

1. Phoenix - Bankrupt! [OnTae]

They realize sometime around week two that bathing is hard in a house with no running water.

There’s a well out back, but the water’s brown, and Jinki insists they boil it and use it only for drinking and cooking. They spend hours trekking to the stream a few miles out, through brush and woods, over fox dens and muddy leaves. Taemin turns his back when Jinki undresses as a courtesy, but sometimes he swears he can feel eyes on his own when he pulls his shirt over his head.

The plague left them without family, without much of anything but the squirrels and rabbits, the bullfrogs peeping choruses of nonsense late at night. Taemin thinks maybe this is the reason he kisses Jinki first. He hasn’t seen a girl in eight months. Maybe it wouldn’t have mattered, though – he remembers in school how he’d liked Jinki’s eyes just as much as he does now. It’s just that in school he hadn’t thought about the other parts so much.

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