"Why in the actual fuck am I dressed in a French maid outfit?"
Oh boy. Jeez. Uhm…. alright. Let’s do this.
“I know you’re mad.”
“You’re really mad.”
“And I know you probably have some questions.”
Yui let out a sigh and said, “Go ahead.”
Daichi propped his hands up on his hips and glared at her, “Why in the actual fuck am I dressed in a French maid outfit?”
“I know you’re mad,” Yui said again, lifting her hands defensively.
“I’m not mad,” he argued, swatting at the fabric of his much too short skirt. “I just want answers.”
“Okay, so you know how that street fair is going on right now?”
“Well, Boss wants us to have someone walk around, offering samples to the people out there and draw in a crowd to the cafe,” she said. “And so we decided that the person that does it should be the most eye catching out of all of the staff-”
“How the fuck did you come to the conclusion that I should be the one-”
“Honestly it’s the thighs,” Yukie admitted as she walked up and joined the conversation.
Daichi looked down at his thighs with a frown. The thigh high, lace socks they had given him barely fit over his legs and they squeezed his muscles uncomfortably.
“It’s not just the thighs,” Yui gave Yukie a pointed stare. “It’s also because you’re the only man working today.”
“And so of course, the only man should be in the dress,” Daichi said dully.
“Don’t be so bitchy about it, Dai-chan,” Yukie patted him on the chest, paused, and then squeezed his left pectoral.
Daichi slapped her hand away.
“Last time one of us went out advertising, we got groped,” Yui said, crossing her arms over her chest. “Do you want to send us helpless, weak, fragile lambs out there to the wolves?” She batted her eyelashes.
“If you’re a fragile lamb, then I’m Stevie Wonder.”
“It’s fine,” Yukie climbed onto a chair and slipped a frilly headband onto his hair, completing the look. “Just go out there and get attention. Then point them in our direction and we’ll do the rest.”
Daichi sighed and kicked his heel against the floor of the cafe.
“I hate you guys.”
Yukie wiggled, rubbing her fists against her cheeks as she pouted out her lips and whined in a high pitched, mocking voice, “Oooohh boo hoo, I’m Sawamura Daichi and I don’t want to wear a dress in public!”
“You act like I’m being unreasonable,” he snapped. “I think it’s within my rights to be annoyed about having to dress up like a fucking maid in public. I am a man. Damn it. I have self respect. I like sports and hard liquor and… and… cars. I’m a man!”
“Then man the fuck up, get out there, and shake your ass for the customers!” Yukie hopped down from the chair and slapped him on the rear end, sending him stumbling forward slightly.
“Don’t worry about it, Sawamura,” Yui took his arm and led him towards the door, Yukie trailing behind. “It’ll be over before you know it.”
“Yeah,” Yukie grabbed a tray full of cake samples from a table along the way. “All you gotta worry about is bringing in more business than those bastards across the street.”
“Which shouldn’t be hard,” Yui said encouragingly. “There’s no way anyone will be able to resist the appeal of a sexy man in a maid uniform.”
Daichi scrunched his nose.
They dragged him to the front door and then opened it, ushering him out onto the street.
“Here,” Yukie offered the tray and he took it reluctantly. “When you need more, just come back and I’ll fill you up again-”
“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” Yui exclaimed.
The others looked to her.
“What?” Daichi asked, balancing the tray on his hand.
“Look! They stole our idea!” Yui pointed across the street.
Daichi followed her point to the cafe that the girls had deemed their rivals the day it opened six months ago. Standing out front was a beautiful woman with black hair, a shorter woman with blonde hair, and a man.
A man dressed similarly to Daichi, in a mini skirt maid uniform, but with about double the frills of Daichi’s, and black lace thigh highs instead of white. In his pale grey hair was a large black bow, and he also held a tray, upon which were cake samples.
“Cheaters!” Yukie shouted across the street.
The women and man turned in their direction.
“Ugh, they got Sugawara-san to dress up?” Yui groaned. “Not fair!”
“Who?” Daichi stared at the man opposite him as a wide grin stretched across his face and he nudged the woman with the black hair.
“You don’t know Sugawara-san?” Yukie gaped at him. “Oh my god. He’s a total BABE. He’s super nice and cute and makes really good coffee.”
Daichi turned towards her, “You’ve had his coffee?”
Yukie pursed her lips and looked away, “What? I like to drink around…”
“Well we’re fucked,” Yui snapped. “Sugawara-san is WAY prettier than Sawamura.”
“But Sawamura has better thighs!” Yukie reached out and groped Daichi’s left thigh.
He swatted her hand away.
“It’s okay,” Yui inhaled deeply and let it out. “It’s fine. Girls will squeal over Sugawara-san’s cuteness, but women will fawn over Sawamura’s sex appeal.”
“And the men?” Daichi asked wearily, watching as the two other women across the street disappeared into their cafe, leaving Sugawara alone on the sidewalk.
“Sugawara-san will win the tachi and Sawamura will win the neko.” Yukie pinched his ass.
“What does that even mean?”
Yukie and Yui exchanged a look.
“Nothing,” they said simultaneously.
“Alright,” Yui patted him on the shoulder. “Go get ‘em, Tachi.”
Yukie giggled and they fled back into the cafe.
Daichi stared across the street at Sugawara, who continued to stare back. He searched for a hint in the man’s body language just what he thought about being forced to participate in such a circus act. He stood tall, one hip cocked to the side, hand propped up on it as he held the tray up on his other. He looked confident and comfortable, much more so than Daichi.
This is going to fuckin’ suck, he thought with a sigh. He lifted a hand in a respectful wave.
Sugawara’s mouth stretched wide in a grin and he shifted sideways, lifting one long, sleek leg up, bending at the knee delicately. He then grabbed the hem of his skirt and lifted it up, flashing a pair of black, lacy underwear and pale thighs.
Daichi’s eyes widened and his cheeks flamed. He steadied the tray with his empty hand when he almost dropped it to the sidewalk.
Sugawara lowered his skirt and dropped his leg once more. He turned and headed down the street, throwing his head back.
Light peals of laughter floated on the breeze and tickled Daichi’s ears.
Fuck, he cleared his throat and turned down the sidewalk in the direction of the street fair.
It was going to be a long day.