how absolutely beautiful he is

3

a smiley joe. 

I had a dream last night that I was Megamind

and it was E X C E L L E N T.

It was pre-movie; I was in the middle of an evil plot that was outside the Evil Lair and Roxanne was there (!!!) and tied up, only it was really windy out and she said she hadn’t gotten her hair cut in a while, so it was a little long. 

And it kept blowing in her face, so she finally got annoyed enough with it that she told me to get a pair of bobby pins out of her purse and pin it back for her.

(!!!!!)

aaaaaaahhhhhhh and I brushed her hair back from her face and I ALMOST DIED OF HAPPINESS, LET ME TELL YOU.

Also, it is INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT to pin someone’s hair for them when you have never had hair of your own, so I was S T R U G G L I N G, but Roxanne thought it was funny and she laughed (!!!)

And I finally got her hair pinned out of her face, and she jokingly asked if she looked funny and I was already pretty flustered so I was like “no no; you look really pretty!”

and she raised her eyebrows at me and said I must rate my skills as a hairdresser pretty high and I started babbling about how she always looked pretty and it was EXCRUCIATINGLY EMBARRASSING OH MY EVIL GODS.

But Roxanne seemed to think that was funny, too, which (!!!! ??? !!!!)

And then Metro Man showed up, only I’d been so busy with Roxanne that I hadn’t actually even set up the evil plot, so I decided to pretend that there…wasn’t an evil plot. And we were still technically on the Evil Lair grounds, and Metro Man isn’t supposed to attack there unless there’s an evil plot happening.

But Metro Man was all suspicious, so I was like “no, really, nothing happening here” only he insisted that Roxanne was there, and barged past me to look for her and I was like ‘shit’, but when we got to where she had been tied up, she wasn’t there.

(she must have escaped while I was gone)

So Metro Man left and I was like “well, this day is a bust, might as well take a nap,” so I went to my bedroom and took off my shirt and lay down on the bed and okay, maybe I wasn’t exactly intending on napping, per se, but luckily I didn’t do much more than think about…that…because 

THE CLOSET DOOR OPENED AND

ROXANNE POPPED OUT

And I screamed and launched myself off the bed.

When Roxanne finally stopped laughing at that, she told me she’d gotten lost looking for the exit after she escaped, and had hidden in the closet. 

She also added “now you know how it feels when people break into your house and jump out at you, Megamind.”

I was like “I HAVE NEVER JUMPED OUT OF YOUR BEDROOM CLOSET AT YOU, MISS RITCHI; THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR.”

And she was leaning up against the doorframe of the closet and I was on the floor in front of her, trying to find my shirt so I could put it on, only it was all inside out and I was flustered because Roxanne (!!!) was in my bedroom (!!!) and she was looking at me with this–expression of amused fondness and it was really difficult to try to function with that happening–

She was teasing me about screaming, which she never does, when I woke up.

…and I just realized, typing this out, that she could have easily waited for me to fall asleep before sneaking out to find the exit, but she deliberately came out of the closet while I was still awake, so she must have wanted to–see me–talk to me–interact with me more–

DAMN IT, WHY DID THE DREAM HAVE TO END THERE?!?

Out of the Blue 02

Rated: M

Warnings: Explicit vulgar hybrid smut, knotting, dirty talk. 

Summary: Jungkook has only ever thought of his breeding clients as just that - clients, and he’s always quite indifferent to them since he only ever knows them for a short period of time. But then you come along, and he starts experiencing feelings that aren’t being manipulated by your heat. Real feelings, that he has never harbored before with anyone else.

Notes: in a world where shower sex is Effortless. LOLLL also plz enjoy the stereotypical dogs love peanut butter thing in this it brought me joy

Words: 5k

01 | 02


It was silent, save for the light clinking of the spoon Seokjin was using to stir his tea. Namjoon sat at the island in the middle of the large kitchen, staring down at his cup of tea which was untouched, worrying about one thing and one thing only.

“So what do you think they’re doing?”

Seokjin promptly stopped stirring his tea at the question and turned around away from the counter to look at Namjoon, his eyebrow raised and a small smile playing at his lips. “Do you really want me to answer that?” He sauntered over to the island where Namjoon was seated, taking a sip of his tea on the way over.

Sheepishly, Namjoon chuckled and ducked his head, cheeks turning red from the slight embarrassment and scratching the back of his neck. What a foolish question he had asked. “Oh- um, yeah, I guess not.”

“Yeah, they’ll be doing that for awhile,” Seokjin explained in amusement, taking a seat at the island across from him. “But later on, they’ll take a break.. Come downstairs, eat and drink something - recharge, perhaps. Don’t get it twisted though, you won’t be able to…. touch her, if you know what I mean. Not even a rub on the arm. Jungkook will be attached at her hip. He’s very territorial and possessive of his clients, I’m afraid. Well, I’m sure you know that well enough.”

Keep reading

Bilingual Klance be like
  • (Lance and Hunk sitting down in the lounge room)
  • Lance: OK, but Hunk- mi amigo-
  • Hunk: Yes?
  • Lance: I just don't understand it! How can Keith be so-
  • Hunk: Lance!
  • Hunk (points to Keith walking into the room):
  • Keith:
  • Lance: Dios mío
  • *Oh my God*
  • Keith: Lance:¡Hunk, sólo míralo!... ¡Mira!¡Él es absolutamente hermoso! ¿Cómo puede ser tan caliente? Dios mío...
  • *Hunk, just look at him! Look! He is absolutely beautiful! How can someone be so hot? My God...*
  • Lance(puts face in his hands): Lo quiero tanto...
  • *I want him so much*
  • Hunk (didn't understand a single word, but got the jest and pats Lance's back): Y-yeah... sure thing buddy
  • Keith:
  • Keith (walks up behind Lance and kisses his neck): Te quiero, tambien... embeleso.
  • *I want you too... sweetheart.*
  • Keith (walking away): Hasta luego, mi amor.
  • *See you later, my love*
  • Lance (blushes furiously):
  • Hunk: What did he say?
  • Lance: N-nada... I mean...
  • Lance (immediately leaves the room): NoThINg!!
  • -I'm sorry if my Español is a little rusty lol... I only learned it through the school system for five years... if I said anything incorrectly please let me know-
{PART 9} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut

Summary; Jungkook takes you shopping and you inadvertently give him a lesson on just how cruel humans can be to each other.

{Part 1} // {Part 8} {Part 9} {Part 10}

I update this series every Tuesday evening, 9pm-10pm (UK Time)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Interviewer: "so you've already mentioned that one of your "best friends" was the first person to hear the song, right?" Harry: "yes it was a very close friend of mine" interviewer: "and if you don't mind me asking, what was their first reaction when they heard it?" (1)

Harry: “uhm, well, what happened was, we were both having lunch, and I was like "I’ve recorded the song” and my friend was like “oh really? Already done with everything”? And I was like “yeah, wanna hear it?” and he was like “of course I wanna hear it Harry don’t be silly”“ (2)

interviewer: "oh so it’s a he!” Harry: “yeah, so we went to o-the bedroom, my bedroom, and i gave him my laptop with some headphones so he could listen to it clearly you know? And I left the room, closed the door, and waited outside. I remember how anxious and worried I was, because well… I really care about his opinion, you know? Like, his opinion really does matter a lot to me. So I stayed outside, and I waited for 5 minutes, thinking that he will come out in a few seconds” (3)

“But he didn’t, not until 10 minutes passed, and I started getting worried, you know? And then he came out, and his eyes were so wet and red, and he just stared at me for a few seconds, and then he bursted into tears, and he told me how absolutely beautiful he thought the song was, and that was all what mattered to me, you know? For him to like the song, because his opinion means so much to me” (4)

interviewer: “seems like you two are quite close!” Harry: “well yeah, the song was written about him after all.” (5)

everything about this is so RUDE you are RUDE

2

i procrastinated again i’m so sorry mother

i absolutely love the garrison trio but i don’t draw them that often… but here they roll

also silly keith is my thing and he’s sleeping and i believe he can fall asleep anywhere

Dating Montgomery De La Cruz With Chubby!Reader

Request: Maybe could you please do a Monty x Chubby!Reader headcannons please?

A/N: I hope you like this :) Sorry for the delay.

Warnings: Self-consciousness.


Dating Montgomery De La Cruz With Chubby!Reader…

  • You were the new student in school, and your parents were making you go to every extra curricular activity for the first couple weeks to help you try and find friends
  • It was at a baseball game that you met Monty. You were just wandering around the side of the grandstand, not exactly wanting to sit somewhere by yourself where you could be a target to the other kids
  • Monty spotted you on his way into the field. Something about you sparked his interest, and he continued to check you out while you made small talk. Eventually he lead you on your way to sit with Sheri and Jessica, and he made sure you were all well on your way to being friends when he left

 

  • You grew closer to the jocks and cheerleaders as a whole, and Monty had certainly made no attempts to leave your side. You didn’t exactly understand why it was you he liked, and you were a little alarmed when he asked you out, but you said yes anyway, and words couldn’t describe how happy you were when you finally realised he was genuine
  • He made you feel beautiful
  • There were so many sweet kisses
  • He’s always kissing your cheeks

 

  • Wrapping you up in his arms when you kiss
  • Always kissing you in the school halls
  • Being super overprotective of you
  • Threatening anyone who so much as looks at you wrong

  • Everyone is too scared to say anything bad about you
  • Always reassuring you of how beautiful you are
  • And he absolutely expects you to wear his jacket no matter how much you argue that it won’t be flattering
  • He’ll buy himself bigger clothes if it means you’ll finally start taking them and wearing them

  • His hands are all over your curves all the time
  • Tucking yourself into his chest when you feel self-conscious
  • And he runs his fingers through your hair and whispers reassuring things to you
  • Monty always smiling like an idiot at you when you’re completely carefree

  • Cuddling together all the time
  • He snuggles up in your chest, or he’ll spoon with you and give you soft kisses
  • He loves to see you in lingerie
  • And when he does he’ll kiss every part of your perfect body

  • He crushes every insecurity you have the second you mention it, because he swears you’re just perfect
  • Monty just adoring you and never letting you think badly of yourself

Request | Requests Queue | Masterlist

Songs about Geri on El Dorado:
  • Me Enamore: Song narrating when Shakira first met Gerard and how she quickly felt physical attraction to him and fell in love. 
  • Amarillo (Yellow): This is the song that Geri talked about that includes a Catalan word in it (T'Estimo=I love you). 
  • Coconut Tree: This song talks about a trip Shak & Geri first took as a couple, where they went searching for a lost island to find peace. She describes the feeling of falling in love “under a coconut tree where we created a universe”.
  • Toneladas: A ballad that talks about the “tons” of love Shakira receives from Geri and how happy he makes her.
Sally and Poseidon Headcanons

Requested by this anon, and most of these were inspired by this post by Lili

  • Just imagine Poseidon seeing Sally on the beach and being reeled in like an absolute sucker because how is he meant to resist a beauty like that??
  • He lays on the charm and she’s not really feeling it, tbh, but then he stuffs up and says something dumb and goes a bit pink in the face, and Sally smiles and says, “Okay. You can take me on a date.”
  • Poseidon knows exactly how this is going to end but he lets himself fall for Sally anyway
  • (He loved her don’t you dare try to tell me otherwise how could anyone not love Sally Jackson)
  • So he tries to ignore that the fact that is definitely going to end bad, because they’re so happy and Sally is just so good. She’s a good person, she’s good for him, she’s good at life
  • She smiles a lot and has this effortless charm to her that he is just smitten with
  • One of his favourite things in the world is to make her laugh. He loves the way the corners of her eyes crinkle up and how she completely loses herself in it
  • Things move fast and the first night they spend together Sally falls asleep in Poseidon’s arms, lulled by the sound of the waves hitting the shore, and he doesn’t get a lot of sleep because he just wants to soak in as much of her as possible
  • The next morning she slips on his button down to wear while she gets ready, and when he tells her she looks absolutely incredible she decides to keep it on for the rest of the day. She wears it with a pair of denim shorts that drive him crazy
  • He peels it off her that night, kissing every inch of skin he reveals as he pushes it off her shoulders and down her arms
  • He cries when she tells him she’s pregnant
  • She cries when he tells her he’s a god: at first because she’s scared, then because she’s angry he didn’t tell her sooner, and then because she understands he’ll have to leave
  • And he knows she’s going to be okay when he leaves; he knows she’ll get along okay without him and that she’ll protect their child with her life. But it hurts to think about, and the inevitability of it makes him mad
  • Poseidon doesn’t want to waste their time together being mad, though, so he continues to throw himself into the relationship wholeheartedly, and Sally does the same
  • But of course that just makes it worse when they do have to part. He can’t bring himself to look her in the eye and tell her he’s leaving for good, so he waits until she’s in a deep, deep sleep, and then he disappears, leaving behind his shirt, a handwritten note and a faint ocean breeze
  • The sea isn’t calm, varying between choppy and stormy, for the next month
  • There’s a reason Percy doesn’t have any younger demigod siblings (because it takes a long time to get over a girl like Sally)
  • After Poseidon meets Percy for the first time he decides to check in on Sally. He can’t bring himself to talk to her (that’s too much for one day, even for a god), but he checks in on her and he sees her standing there holding the button down he left behind all those years ago
  • He hears her praying to him to keep Percy safe, and he watches her slip the shirt on over her shoulders. And in that moment he sees the woman he fell in love with all those years ago
  • But now it’s raw and fresh and feels as though it were brand new and happening right now all over again 
  • And Poseidon promises Sally that he will keep their child safe, just like she has for the last 12 years
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Given straight to Paul Scholes - what about that! What about that!