how about a real challenge

Seems to be a lot of hatred for “Rocknaldo” online immediately after its air date. Some people are just pissed that a CN promo made them think we’d be meeting a new Gem instead of watching Ronaldo choose a Gem nickname (I didn’t believe we’d be getting a new Gem for a second, given the style of the tease). But most of it’s just Ronaldo hate in general. Ronaldo’s a jerk, etc. Well yeah. He’s a jerk.

But here’s why I think this episode is important. Not Ronaldo’s redemption / apology / stating outright that he was wrong, though that’s good too. Not Steven giving chances to people for trying to understand, though again that’s good too. It’s important because in a simplified way, this brought to light how people who claim to want to understand us and help us can frequently engage in self-serving, counterproductive behavior.

I can’t even count the times in my life that someone “interested in” one of the several marginalized communities I’m part of has committed to a poorly organized, cursory study of my outsider group and then confronted me with claims that they understand what I should be doing better than I do. This is how I should handle my activism. This is the way I should prioritize my goals. This is a behavior or perspective of mine that’s alienating “normal” people like them. They accuse us of hypocrisy or misguidedness because they think it isn’t working if it’s not designed to serve and center them, and then they claim they have a better grasp of my mission than I do.

But this is my whole life. These are our whole lives.

Perspectives from outside are usually welcome, but not at the expense of ours. Not in place of and prioritized over lived experience. They should be learning from us, not striding in and telling us as an ally, they know better than we do what would forward our cause and what would bring us all together for good. Ronaldo in this episode is the worst kind of false ally. He came into Steven’s life with a so-called interest in what the Crystal Gems do, but applied his own ideas of what they’re like:

  • Expecting to be “issued” a Gem
  • Telling Steven he should be proud and show off his Gemstone even though he had misgivings about it
  • Focusing on how “cool” he sounded with his new label
  • Challenging more established members as to whether they really belonged there
  • Explicitly accusing established members of having false and invalid reasons for being included
  • Forcing himself to conform to imagined standards of the group even though they weren’t natural for him (not sleeping), then bragging about how Real Crystal Gem it made him
  • Responding to challenges by telling an established member that HE needed to go think about his validity to the group

These are all fake ally techniques most of us have seen with people who aren’t REALLY here about forwarding the cause. They give it a cursory study (if that), they slap a star on their shirt and use a new name, and they seek to climb the ranks of legitimacy by knocking down people “above” them who have done their time. Are you sure you really care about this mission? Don’t I seem to have a considered opinion because I’m being critical? Aren’t you really being the hypocrites by claiming you want to help and protect humanity but not accepting ME as I twist your mission statement to fit my agenda? The agenda, of course, just like with Ronaldo, is making THEM feel good. 

If they truly understood, they would apprentice themselves to those for whom THIS IS THEIR WHOLE LIFE, and they would listen FAR more than they would talk. This is not only a way to offer respect and deference to their expertise; it is EFFECTIVE. It is the best way to get an education about what actually helps in a cause. Your ideas may be valuable and your questions are worth asking, but as a person who is perhaps trying to enter a movement alongside those whose very lives are consumed by it, you must listen hard, and listen first. 

Ronaldo still doesn’t totally get it at the end. He thinks the real problem is he’s just too much of an outsider, even for outsiders. At least he’s closer to the truth now and isn’t actively spreading harmful lies, but well-meaning allies who don’t listen can still be more hurt than help. He seems happy emphasizing the imagined mystique that comes with being the “ultimate outsider,” but really, he’s a person who wants a cause more than he actually cares about any causes. 

The Ronaldos of this world want to have done but don’t want to do. They want to skip to the part where they’re the hero of the battle, but not have to be humbled by the long hours and days of injuries, practice, concentration, and dedication. They want glory, and they have the mainstream perspective that they must be aggressive, confident, and competitive against others on their same side before they’ll come out on top. If you are an outsider to a movement and you truly want to be an ally, you must know why. Ronaldo couldn’t have answered the first question about what the Crystal Gems fight for. He never demonstrated that he could be trusted with the answer, though Steven was tolerant enough to keep giving him the benefit of the doubt.

A good lesson I took from this episode is this: If a Ronaldo is trying to infiltrate your inner circle and he’s already billing himself as an expert above people with more life experience, keep in mind that he is there to make everything about your movement conform to an ideology that serves HIM, and if necessary he will warp it and turn it against the people who are living it. And even if you’re part of a movement but have some similarities to Ronaldo—like Steven sharing Ronaldo’s experience of having an organic body and not being trusted on missions at first—don’t let a superficial similarity be misinterpreted as a substitute for authentic lived experience on the axis you’re examining here. 

Invite new allies slowly, with caution, the way Steven and later the other Gems began to welcome Connie into the fold after she demonstrated solidarity, respect, and patience. If they show up on your doorstep with a suitcase and they’re asking why THEY don’t get your mother’s sword within a day, that is a red flag. They will divide and damage your core team in search of personal glory, and if you can’t get them to curb this behavior and sit down, you may have to turn them away for your own safety. Don’t let them take the glory from you, and if you do that, they will find a “better” cause that serves their REAL agenda soon enough.

Support "The Real O'Neals."

This is the first prime time COMEDY I can think of in which the main character is a gay teenager.

I’m stressing the word “comedy” because most media combinations of “gay” and “teens” are depressing dramas about coming out. This, however, is not a sob story. It taps into the emotion of coming out and the want for familial acceptance through humor.

It’s definitely not the first comedy with a gay lead; we had “Will and Grace” and “Ellen.” Unlike those characters, however, the lead of “O'Neals” is not a fully grown adult, but a teenager in high school. Furthermore, unlike “Glee,” the gay character isn’t just a supporting role or a subplot, but the protagonist and the narrator.

I wish this show was around when I was coming out as a teenager. It would’ve given me someone to look up to, to identify with. Think of all the gay teenagers this show can inspire.

Better yet, the actor who plays the lead is gay in real life and–thankfully–not just some heterosexual actor in a homosexual role.

Is it a perfect show? No, it’s still trying to find its specific humor, but that’s normal for a new show.

Also, it’s an interesting form of ethnic and religious representation. They’re not the traditional WASP family featured in most sitcoms. The show is very much about their American Irish-Catholic culture and traditions, and how real world scenarios challenge their cultural and religious ideals, thus providing the show with an interesting and unique spin to work off of.

Honestly, give it a chance and support it. For a show primarily about a gay character to be on Disney owned ABC at prime time: that’s a big deal and definitely a triumph in its own respect.

OFF TO A NEW START (MINI SURPRISE FOR YOU)

This is going to be my last entry about college. Please allow me to be sentimental with the ups and downs that I’ve been through in those four years. 

I’m so grateful that despite the challenges, I still manage to graduate on time. It’s not easy to have additional subjects every semester and always being left behind from your batchmates. I keep on reminding myself that I need to focus on my goal while juggling extra-curricular opportunities. 

The hardships I experienced in college is not solely about academics but rather real life challenges. I love how college made me wise and strong. Ang saya na makita na nag-iimprove yung sarili mo sa pag-handle ng problema. (Minsan nga hindi mo na pinoproblema kasi sanay ka na hahaha) 

Keep reading

Day 25 - Inktober + DGM Challenge - Your favourite location

This mysterious place, only seen in dreams and minds of certain characters. To me, it is something that defines DGM’s imagery and overall athmosphere. It speaks of mystery, unconsciousness, time, history, and fate. If I have to think of a location that is truly unique to DGM, it’s definitely this scrabbled world.

7

embarrassingly, i cried while drawing this ~ 30 day otp challenge

What your least favorite HQ!! Captain says about you:
  • Daichi: I BET YOU SKIP LEG DAY. never skip leg day. it's important. you hate dad jokes. Hate rules.
  • Oikawa: Kageyama is probably your favorite character? That middle school scene probably still bugs the shit out of you. Very critical of others. But like you can back your shit up real well. Stubborn af. You probably have more in common with Oikawa than you think. Ironically enough, there's a good chance you read Iwaoi fics. You love Iwaizumi.
  • Kuroo: You hate cats. Dog person? You take real good care of your hair. You want to give Kuroo a brush. You have a height insecurities. 178 cm?? Recent break-up?? Daishou, you're Daishou??
  • Bokuto: how dare you, you should be ashamed of yourself now go sit in a corner.
  • Moniwa: Bad memory. Very forgetful. It's okay.
  • Futakachi: Still bitter about Karasuno third year's loss to Datekou. How dare they block Asahi. Protects gentle giant with a glass heart at all costs. Will fight others.
  • Terushima: There's like a 76% chance you refer to him as a fuckboy? Very defensive of others. You remember all that wronged you and others very well. List maker.
  • Ushijima: You really love sunshine child--Hinata. Probably not caught up with HQ!! Manga yet. Big Oikawa fan. Very emotional.Passionate. Not a good gardener?
  • Michimiya: Hardcore DaiSuga shipper? Daiyui as NOTP/BROTP.
  • Daishou: I can betcha this is 97.8% of the fandom right now, if you are a manga reader at least. How about trying to pick a second least favorite captain as a real challenge, eh? Hard as hell, huh? Yeah, I'm with you on that one. It's okay. Let's think about Haikyuu!! Season 3 instead.

Sorry for the inactivity around here! The last week or so has gotten away from me. I’m going to open up the askbox for questions and try answer @sleepyzenpanda‘s very interesting question about the role of the color purple as it relates to Tomoe (and many other characters in animanga.)

I’m going to post a few meme templates. Everyone and anyone is free to adapt them for their own purposes, but I hope you’ll send a few submissions my way. I’m hoping to get some submissions other than Kenshin: he’s the easy choice. How about a real challenge like Iwanbo? 

Okay, that’s probably a REALLY hard one. But there are many other interesting members of the cast nobody has asked me about! I’m also going to take this opportunity to pester @mysteriouslysaltytragedy to send me an invite to @rkdiscussions, assuming the blog is still alive and kicking.

In other news, I’ve stumbled upon some gorgeous Inuyasha fanart I’d like to share in addition to the RuroKen stuff I’ve found on pixiv. I tend to shy away from Inuyasha discourse because of the constant ship wars, but I know several of my followers here also enjoy the show, so I would like to share it if/when I get permission.

Please oh please, no ship wars here!

Anyway, I figures I should drop you guys a line and reassure you that I haven’t abandoned this blog or value you any less than the followers on my main. I love Ruroken as much as I always have: I’m just being a little overprotective of “my baby” after someone started flagging RuroKen content and only RuroKen content in a way that potentially jeopardize my main blog.

In any case, I’m going to post a little fanart in the meantime. Original written content is on it’s way soon. ^_~

Eight Ball - Dally

It was a Friday night and you’d decided last minute to hit the bar instead of sit at home bored. People overflowed from the front door making it hard to enter, the smell of smoke and alcohol hit you as you passed the threshold. A Johnny Cash song playing in the background. Elbowing people out of your way the crowd finally spit you out at the empty pool tables. There were a few guys hanging around it, though no one seemed interested in playing. Your friends, Darla and Sara, immediately sidestepped to the bar already flagging down the bartender. Never having been much of a drinker you head over to the tables. You were a novice player, but it was something to do. Pulling the sunk pool balls from their pockets and ranking them up, you pick a good enough looking stick. Pausing momentarily to chalk the pool stick’s end, you take aim and let the cue ball fly. A few balls separate from the mass, but for the most part it was a pretty weak shot. Trying not to get frustrated you continue to knock balls around, only able to sink a few. Your pool stick planted firmly on the ground, you throw your hip out and stare at the table in concentration.

“You know,” you look up from the table to see a dark haired guy lean against the opposite side of the table, “I could give you a few lessons.”

“Oh, really?” You raise an eyebrow at him, trying to place his face, “I’m not sure why you’re offering. I’m obviously a world class pool player.”

He gives a hint of a smile, “Obviously.” He runs a hand along the wood frame as he moves around the table to your side. “You need to see how the ball you’re aiming for lines up with the pocket,” he holds out a hand asking for the stick. You hand it over amused at his intrusion on your game. He leans over real slick, steadies the pool stick in his fingers, and hits the cue ball square. It whips across the table to hit a solid at an angle, causing it to dart to the left and straight into the middle left pocket.

You scoff a little, playing as if you’re unimpressed, “Is that all you’ve got?” The guy stands to his full height towering several inches above you, his face fully in the light now. That’s when you finally place him, /Dallas Winston/. A little embarrassed by the closeness of him, you take a small step away.

Dally recovers the space and unceremoniously shoves the pool stick into your hands, “Is that so, doll face?” His enthused smirk only seems to enhance his features, making you blush a bit. “If you’re so good, by don’t you show me?”

You gulp. You’ve never been good under pressure, but you toss your hair over your shoulder and get ready to aim. The shot’s terrible, of course. So terrible it sets Dally off laughing.

“A real champ, I see.”

Glaring at him, you can’t help but smile at your awful skills. “Hush, you,” you try to demand.

Dally places a hand on your lower back and moves behind you, “Let me show you how to shot.” Your face burns as you feel his body press against your back. He runs his hands down your elbows and lands at your own hands, getting you in position to shot again. “You need to hold the stick a little firmer,” he adjusts your grip on the middle of the pool stick, “but keep it loose in between your fingers to aim.” With his guidance you pull the stick back, ready let loose on the cue ball. Dally presses his lips to your ear, you can feel the heat of his breath on your neck that sends tingles shooting through the ends of your fingertips all the way down to your tippy toes. “Now,” all other sounds are null, it’s only Dally’s hushed voice in your ear, only the heat of his breath on your neck, “just take aim,” he removes a hand from your arm, placing it to your waist, “keep your body firm,” his other hand finds your hip, “and shoot.” Shivers run down your spine at his touch, at his voice, shivers like springs that contract and release your pent up energy. You hit the cue ball with considerable force which slams into a stripe, sending it spinning into the top right pocket. Ecstatic, you raise your pool stick in triumph.

“Excellent,” Dally, still holding you, gives your neck a kiss.

You’re downright giddy as you try to shield your ticklish neck, giggling.

Dally gets in a few more quick kisses before you’re able to escape to the other side of the table. His mischievous smile challenges you, “How about a real game, sweetheart?”

You slap your hands down on the table, a determined glint in your eye, “You’re on.” You’ll be ready for him this time.

Interested in more? Message me!

louis being the one to splash nick with the water and then laughing when nick barely gets hit and still shivers

and deciding to show how it’s really done by asking their abundant friends on their trip to dump two whole buckets on him

and then jumping straight in the water

COFFEE SHIP-

anonymous asked:

How about a real challenge - "you don't want me" - from Laurent to Damen, lol.

Oh, anon, if you think my faves being deathly afraid that they don’t deserve love and that no one could ever want them isn’t one of my favorite angsty tropes of all time then you are wrong, my friend

Laurent hadn’t been expecting the kiss, that was the problem. If he’d expected, even for a moment, that that was where the night might be headed he would have planned for it. He would have stopped Damen before he ever got the chance to even entertain the thought.

When Damen had cupped the back of his head, slowly, silently asking permission, Laurent had been surprised enough to allow it. If he’d been expecting it, he would have been thinking clearly enough to know to refuse.

When Damen had kissed him - a kiss that had been everything Laurent had allowed himself to imagine it might be and so much more besides - Laurent had been surprised enough to not stop himself from kissing back. If he’d been better prepared, he would have stood there, unresponsive, until Damen realized his feelings weren’t reciprocated and backed off.

But he hadn’t been prepared, and so he’d kissed back until his brain had caught up with the rest of him and he’d jerked away from Damen so violently that Damen’s first response had been to ask Laurent if he was hurt.

And now they were standing under a streetlight at eleven o’clock at night, breathing hard, their breaths leaving vapor trails in the winter air, while Damen tried to understand what had just happened and Laurent tried to explain it.

“You don’t - You don’t want me,” Laurent said at last, unable to think of any other way to say it. Perhaps if he’d been better prepared, he would have known how to have this conversation without showing so much vulnerability. But he hadn’t been prepared. He’d never considered that Damen might think, even for a moment, that he wanted Laurent, of all people.

Damen frowned, his forehead wrinkled with confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“You could have anyone,” Laurent said, and it was true. Anyone would be happy to have Damen. He had the personality, the looks, everything anyone had ever imagined their perfect partner to have. “You don’t want me.”

Damen was still frowning. “I do, actually,” he said. “That’s why I kissed you.”

Laurent shook his head. “You don’t. Maybe you think you do. I’m nice to look at, I know that. But you don’t want everything that comes along with that. You don’t want me.”

Damen was staring at him, and once or twice opened his mouth like he was going to say something, then closed it again as though the words had failed to form.

Laurent backed away from him. He didn’t want to hear what Damen had to say. It would be more platitudes, more assurances, more arguments. They would serve no purpose but to make it hurt Laurent all the more when Damen eventually, inevitably, realized that Laurent was right.

“Goodnight, Damen,” he said, firmly, in the tone he used at the office when he wasn’t giving people even the opportunity to argue with him. “Thank you for dinner.” Then he walked away, and didn’t look back at Damen, who was still standing in the pool of light from the streetlamp, trying to find the words to make Laurent stay.

anonymous asked:

4/4 on how he likes your big boobs (by big I mean like 34 D)

 

PREFERENCE #172: YOU HAVE BIG BOOBS

Luke:

Luke wouldn’t admit it, but he loved your boobs. He’d always try and be cute and act like it didn’t matter what size they were, but you could tell he loved them from the way he’d stare at them. He was always quite vocal in front of the other guys about how he didn’t mind your boobs, but the other guys knew full well they definitely had an effect on him

Calum:

Cal would make it known as often as possible that he fucking loved your tits.He’d always be ‘innocently’ copping a feel and giving you a wink, and he loved to play with them. You obviously didn’t mind because you loved to have them played with, and Cal loved to touch them at any opportunity he got. He found them great

Michael:

Michael always seemed to be fascinated about how everyone can have different size boobs, so it’d be a real challenge for him to keep it together when he saw how ‘big’ yours were. They would certainly turn him on whenever he saw just a bit of your cleavage, and he always make sure you kept them covered around other guys because they were ‘just for him’

Ashton:

He would be in love with you anyway, but your boobs were a huge plus. He’d not admit it, but he was really proud that he’d landed you, and not just for your boobs. He’d always be bragging about it to the other boys, telling them how he loves them. And he’d definitely not keep his hands away from them when you’re in the bedroom. He fucking loved them so much omg

- sarah x

Okay so here’s my basic analysis:

The two women running the panel (and the panelist’s husband) were actually VERY COOL and were basically trying to explain social cues and how you need to respect girls space and right to say no. They talked about how to NOT challenge a girl on her “real nerd status” and instead share your love of a fandom and treat her as an equal. The first thing she said was “if you came here to learn how to get laid, leave. Women are not a conquest.” Their advice was very respectful and I didn’t find it problematic.

THE AUDIENCE AND THEIR QUESTIONS HOWEVER made me want to crawl into a hole, vomit and die. All around fedora madness. I’ve never been so annoyed in my life.

I spoke about “the friendzone” and respecting a girls right to say no and how no girl owes you anything for your kindness.

I went up to the woman running the panel at the end and said “I came here as a raging feminist to criticize this panel, but you really impressed me.”
And she said “I know…I’m a raging feminist too.”

SISTERHOOD WINS AGAIN.