household: swain

Noxians Playing D&D

Darius: You approach a door in the hallway.  How do you proceed?

Draven: I roll to seduce the door.

Darius: You can’t sedu–

Draven:  Natural 20!  Everybody loves Draven~

Darius: You can’t seduce a do–

Sion:  I smash the door off it’s puny hinges with my axe!

Darius:  …Okay roll a strength check.

Sion: *Roars and Rolls dice - Rolls a 1*

Darius: You attempt to smash the door, but the door stands unbending in–

Sion:  I WILL CRUSH YOU ALL!!

Swain: I will roll an Intelligence check to determine the most strategic option for bypassing the door, after which I put that plan into action in the most efficient means possible.

Darius: Very well, Grand General.  Please, roll your dice.

Katarina:  I open the door.

Swain:  Hrm…  A bold move…

Darius:  You failed to check for traps but, you open the door and–

Kled:  Where’s the women folk at!?  This is boring!  It’s makin’ me itch in all my unscratchable places!

Draven: Who invited the squirrel?

Kled:  Squirrel?  Where!?  They’s good eatin!  Skaarl!  Where are my snacks!

Katarina:  My trap-sense gives me bonuses to avoid traps.  I open the door.

Urgot: Sorry I’m late…  I didn’t know we were playing tonight.

LeBlanc:  That’s because no one invited you.

Kled:  Skaarl!  SKAARL!  Where’s my mushroom juice!

Draven: The door falters before Draven’s Charisma.

Darius: You know what?  Rocks fall, everyone dies.

Swain: Just as planned…

—————–[ Meanwhile ]—————–

Riven:  I win again…  That’s 30 straight victories.  …Yay for solitaire.

The Black Rose blooms in the darkest of cities. Green is not the color of growth but of venom. Red is not the color of love but of blood. Citizens die but Noxus endures, growing strong on the shed blood of her people and her enemies.