hotel arena

Sweetest Thing

Pairing: Finn Balor (Fergal Devitt) x Reader 

A/N; If Finn Balor told me he wanted to punch me in the face, I would ask if he wanted to hit my left cheek or right

Summary: Finn Balor thinks you are just the sweetest thing. So much so that all he wants to do is drag you through a crowded room with his arm around your waist and a shit eating grin that tells everyone that you are only his to stare at. 

***********************************************************

“Ouch! Seriously Y/N, I’m not a damn voodoo doll”. 

“Piss off Lexi, you wiggle too much. Not my fault”, you grumble out with a mouth full of pins and a roll of your eyes. 

Alexa lowers her eyes and frowns as she watches you kneel in front of her, trying your best to hem the shit out of the gown that was obviously too long for her tiny stature. Between the two of you, it was no secret that Alexa Bliss was the hardest to dress for formal WWE events, but at the end of the day, as the stylist to the superstars, you had always found a way to make her shine. With that in mind, she should have been more appreciative about your grueling attempt to make the gown for this particular charity event fit. 

Everyone was going to be there tonight. It was a gala for one of the many charities the WWE sponsored which meant the most notable stars from both NXT and WWE needed to make an appearance. Now, as the head of the clothing and costume department, that meant that you and your team were in charge of making everyone dress like royalty. Particularly for you, that meant fitting and styling the best of the best. 

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youtube

For those who want to watch Johnny Weir’s Yuri On Ice and more Q&A~

The part where they start talking about Yuri On Ice starts on 14:51.


Q:This is kind of a silly question but do you have gold blades because of Yuri On Ice?

J:I got the gold blades before I knew about Yuri On Ice, It’s so funny that Yuri On Ice; I loved it, I watched it before the show yesterday, and I think it’s awesome for skating. I never realized how many people watched anime, I never realized the wild world that it is and I’m happy that I’m part of that fandom but the gold blades were just something I wanted to do because I like gold. But it’s funny where people will say on Instagram like “Oh, that looks like Victor’s costume, oh that looks like Victor’s blades,” and I said, I am older than Victor, if anything, they’re mine.

I think Yuri On Ice is great in so many ways and getting into the gay aspect of the anime and it’s more relationship than just gay, some people that aren’t gay aren’t from that world who’ll definitely look and be oh, that’s a gay love story and gay gay gay gay gay, but for me it’s just a relationship and in figure skating there’s a lot of history of appropriate relationships between people that work together.

Yuri On Ice, is ground breaking because it’s about figure skating, I think they portrayed the world—

*Talks about what Yuri On Ice is*

Yuri On Ice, I think, has opened a lot of people from the anime world. They’ve opened them up to figure skating, and that’s a really cool thing because there is costume, pageantry, appreciation of music, movement and artistry and I think that goes hand in hand with anime in a lot of ways, and just as a skater, the way they depict hotels, different ice arenas that I’ve skated in, different things that happen backstage or with other skaters and it’s right on. I think that the creators of Yuri On Ice have brought in real skaters, very high level real skaters into the mix, it’s awesome and the fact that Kenji Miyamoto is the choreographer of the series is awesome. I’ve worked with him, and knew immediately before knowing he was associated with the project, the first time I sat down and watched it, I could tell he had some part in the thing.

Q:And you do think it’s done a pretty good job portraying figure skating realistically?

J: Oh yea, I mean, of course there’s nothing like watching a real figure skater, but they really took time to make sure that if the are commentating on an element, it’s that element in the picture.

The fact that somebodies actually depicted skating in a real way, despite being an anime, I think that’s why so many skaters themselves in the skating world embraced this.

Yuri on Ice is very respectful of skating and the skating world so I think that’s why it does well, with us.

Big Guy - oneshot

aka That Time I Drank A Bottle Of Champagne And Accidentally Wrote Smut

Where Finn and his (unnamed, vague OC) girlfriend have been together for a little bit and in the few months since they first were intimate, she’s yet to get him out of his pants and return the favor. Features one bad Machine Gun pun because I have some restraint, but not a lot.


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Crash Holly
[2003]

While fans of the WWF were introduced to Crash Holly in 1999, the man born as Michael Lockwood would actually start wrestling 10 years earlier, making his pro wrestling debut in 1989. Lockwood wrestled in various companies throughout California, first as Johnny Pearson before finding a niche as “The Leprechaun" Erin O'Grady. Things worked out well for Lockwood as he would wrestle a few matches in ECW, including a dark match at November To Remember 1997. When Lockwood was signed to a WWF contract in 1998, he would wrestle in the developmental promotion PPW, and would wrestle in Mexico as The Green Ghost (a play on the word “gringo”) for the WWF show Los SuperAstros.

In August of 1999, Lockwood debuted on WWF Raw as the cousin of Hardcore Holly. Known as Crash Holly, Lockwood would begin teaming with Hardcore Holly in a tag team known as The Superheavyweights, with both alleging that they weighed over 400 pounds each. The team found success in October, defeating The Rock ‘n’ Sock Connection (The Rock & Mankind) for the WWF World Tag Team Championships. Imagine that: you go from being a leprechaun to an ECW dark match guy, to being a masked wrestler in Mexico, to defeating two future WWE Hall Of Famers for the Tag Team Championships!

Though the Holly Cousins (who would eventually add Molly Holly to the onscreen family) were a successful pairing, the team wouldn’t last forever and Crash Holly would find another niche: the Hardcore division. Inventing the 24/7 rule, Holly would defend the WWF Hardcore Championship from sunup to sundown, fighting in impromptu matches that took place at an arcade, an airport, his hotel room, and throughout arenas across the US. In one segment, Holly was even defeated by one of The Godfather’s ho’s for the title, but would soon win it back.

Holly was well-liked by his peers. He was a tough wrestler despite his size, and would refuse to phone it in, often having lengthy matches on house shows against top level wrestlers. At the Unforgiven pay per view, Holly met N’keigh Wheeler, who he would marry the following December. In June of 2003, Michael Lockwood was released from the WWE as he neared 4 years with the company. The following November, he was discovered at his friend and fellow wrestler Stevie Richards’ house, partially clothed and surrounded by a pool of vomit around his face, as well as an empty bottle of the prescription drug Carisoprodol. He had died from an overdose, an apparent suicide that perhaps stemmed from divorce papers he had received from his wife.

Losing Everything (Part 5 for I’m Sorry...)

Originally posted by stellarollins

A/N: Part five mofos! Thanks to the lovely Anon I’m now putting the link in for the last part as well as the first, for those who would like to read it from the beginning! The First Part! And The Fourth Part!   This part is more about Y/N and Roman, then Seth and Y/N. Just some everyone knows! But I figured you guys already knew that, you know with the last part and all, anyway I’ll shut it! 

Pairings: Seth X Reader X Roman. I guess…. *Shrugs shoulders* 

Warnings: Swearing.

Theme Song: Say Something By A Great Big World.


You and Roman walked into the airport and Roman thought the angry, annoyed look on your face was great, so much so he couldn’t stop laughing. 

You glared at him, although he couldn’t see it, since you had your sunglasses still on.

“Stop smiling! It’s not funny.” You said, angrily.

“Awww, don’t be angry, baby girl! Today is a wonderful day!” Roman said, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

“Says the man that didn’t drink a whole bottle of whisky last night.”

“No I didn’t. But come on, today is a good day and you know it.”

You looked at him, remembering this morning and parts of last night, you blushed and looked away. Roman smiled and mumbled “See”.

“Shut it!” You said.  Roman started laughing, and then kissed the side of your head.

____________________________________________________

You and Roman got everything you needed for the flight, and then got some coffee. Now your both sitting, waiting for your flight.

“Come on! Where are there! I know I have some fucking pills in here, damn it!”

You were digging through your backpack, looking for something to help this damn headache. 

“Here, Y/N.” Roman said. You looked up and seen he was holding a pill bottle in his hand.

“Thanks.” You said, quietly. Roman smiled and said. “No probable, sweetcheeks.”

You looked at him, rolling your eyes. “What’s with the nicknames?” You asked, tossing some pills in your mouth.

Roman shrugged his shoulders and smirked. “Well, you’ve always been my baby girl and last night you showed me you had some sweet cheeks!”

You choked on your coffee and looked over at him, shocked and blushing.

“Roman!” You said, hitting his arm. Roman started laughing. “It’s not funny, Roman! We’re in public!”  That only made Roman laugh harder.

“Fuck you!” You said. Roman stopped laughing, and looked at you with a full blown smile. 

“Don’t you say a fucking thing!” You said, pointing at him. “Roman I’m warning you!” 

“Why are you warning him?” You and Roman both looked up and seen Seth standing there, with Summer on his arm. She had a bruise on the side of her jaw. You gave yourself a pat on the back for that one.

“It doesn’t really concern you, so…” You said, shrugging your shoulders.

“Theres no need to be a bitch!” Summer said, rolling her eyes. You looked at her, you would have glared but you weren’t taking your sunglasses off.

“Why don’t you go fuck yourself and then maybe I won’t a bitch.” You said, cocking your head to the side with a fake smile.

“Come on, Y/N/N. Don’t stoop to their level.” Roman said, laying a hand on your shoulder and giving it a squeeze.

“Stoop to are level?! She would have to move up to be at are level, sweetie.” Summer said, smiling at you and Roman.

“Is that so? Because if I recall, I’m the one getting matches, and you’re…..not. So really you need to move up, in order to be at my level.” You said, smirking.

“Alright, knock it off!” Seth said, glaring at Summer.

You smirked. “Yeah, Summer, knock it off.” 

“Why don’t you knock it off too!” Seth said, now setting his glare on you.

“She doesn’t have to listen to you!” Roman said, suddenly stepping into the conversion.

“Why don’t you shut the fuck up, Roman! No one was talking to you!” Seth said.

“Well actually, I was talking to him, before you and her came over, for a reason that nobody knows….” You said.

“I came over here because I needed to talk to you about something.” Seth said.

“Then why is she here?” You asked, pointing to Summer.

“I have a name!” Summer said.

“I know. But it leaves a nasty taste in my mouth.”  Summer was about to say something, but Seth cut her off. 

“Summer, go get the coffee, please.” Seth said, through his teeth.

Summer sent a glare at you and then walked away. Seth then turned to. “Can we talk for a minute, in private?”

You sighed and then looked over at Roman, who just nodded his head, with a smile. But you could tell it was forced.

You stood and followed Seth over to a empty seating place. Seth turned and glared at you.

“I seen it!” Seth said, crossing his arms.

“Seen what?”

“You and Roman this morning!” You looked at him shocked for a minute, and then smirked. 

“Jealous?”

Seth looked at you, sadness suddenly coming over his face. “Yeah I am, actually.”

You looked at him, before looking away quickly. “I don’t know what to tell you, Seth. You can’t have the both of us. And to me, you seem to want Summer, more then you want me. I mean you made out with her yesterday and then come here with her.”

“I’m sorry…”

“It seems you’ve been saying that a lot lately.”

You looked at the time on your watch and seen it was almost time for flight. 

“I got to go….” You said, as you backed up a few steps, before turning and walking away.


Originally posted by make-happeen

You were walking around backstage, you didn’t have a match tonight and you would have stay at the hotel, but Roman forced you to go tonight, because he needed you for good luck. That’s such a fucking lie.

“Y/N! Wait!” You heard some yell your name, so you turned and see Summer jogging her way over to you.

You smiled and wave, but then flipped her off and mouthed “Fuck you” You turned back around and continued to walk to the vending place.

“Y/N! Please just wait!” 

You sighed and stopped. “What the fuck do you want?” 

Summer stopped and looked at you, then down at her feet. 

“I want to say that I’m sorry. Sorry about what happen in the airport and at the bar. He was yours, but I didn’t know. He told me that you broke up and today I found out that you two were still dating. So….I just wanted to say sorry.” 

“And I understand if you don’t want to accept that, that you don’t believe it. Because if I were you I wouldn’t forgive me.”

You stood there, looking at her. “He….he said we weren’t dating?”

“I’m sorry, Y/N! I didn’t know! If I knew I wouldn’t have done that! I wouldn’t steal another woman’s man!”

“When…..when did it start?” You asked, although you weren’t sure if you wanted to know.

Summer rubbed the side of her neck. “Almost right after you left on injury. He said you broke up with him right before you left and that he just wanted someone to cheer him up. I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“I can’t believe he said that. I…just….just forget it. I’m not mad at you anymore. You did the right thing by telling me.” You said, you turning and walking away from her.

This brought on a different kind of hurt. He wanted to cheat. Like of course he did, but he set out to cheat, like right after you left. It was stupid to think that he would actually love you. You should’ve just listened to the other girls.

_____________________________________________________

You walked into Roman’s locker room and sat in one of the folding chairs.

“Hey, baby girl.” Roman said, sitting in the other chair.

“He said….that we broke up, just so he could get into Summer’s pants….”

“Oh, Y/N! I’m so sorry!” Roman said, reaching over and taking your hand in his.

“I just want to go back to the hotel. When’s your match?” 

“Go without me. I’ll get a ride back with Dean. alright, just go.” 

You nodded your head and stood, but before you left, Roman pulled you into a hug, wrapping his big arms around you.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” Roman mumbled, into your hair. You looked up at him, locking eyes with him. Roman looked from your eyes to your lips, and then leaned down, pressing his lips, to yours.

You wrapped your arms around his neck. Roman pulled away gently and reseted his forehead against yours, pecking your lips.

“I’ll be at the hotel later, okay? Lay down and relax, you need it.” Roman mumbled, against your lips.

“Mm, okay.” Roman pecked your lips one more time, before pulling away. 

You smiled at him and he smiled back before you walked out the door.


Originally posted by matildastenberg

You got yourself some ice cream and came back to the hotel after leaving the arena, you didn’t even chance into comfortable clothes, because you turned on the TV and saw your favorite movie. 

The movie was helping take your mind off, the whole new info you got about Seth. It hurt to know he lied and said you weren’t dating, like you thought he loved you, and he didn’t. He just wanted you, so what, no one else could? You needed to sit down and talk with him, no you wanted to sit and talk with him. 

Tell him how you really feel, how he made you feel. Both before this happen and after. You knew he probably didn’t care, but you still thought he should now how you felt.

You were about half way though the movie and ice cream tub, when you heard the hotel room door, open and close. You looked away from the TV just long enough to see that Roman was back.

“Hey.” Roman said, crawling in bed and flopping down next to you.

“Mm, hey.” You said, watching the TV.

“How ya doing?”

“I’m fine.” 

“Lier. You’re not fine. You’re never fine and then always come to me bitching.” Roman grunted, rolling out of bed.

“What the fuck is the supposed mean?” You asked, looking away from the TV.

“It means you always have problems and never deal with them yourself.” Roman said, with his back towards you.

You looked down at your ice cream. Why was he acting like an asshole out of the blue like this? He didn’t seem to have a probable at the arena.

“I mean, you always get into a fight with Seth, and then come to me crying and bitching and I never say a thing. But you know what, I’m sick of taking care of you, Y/N! What am I gonna get out of this! Uh?!” 

You didn’t say anything, because he was right. He wasn’t getting anything out of this. But what, last night and that kiss in the locker room. 

You were losing everything. You lost your boyfriend, and now you’re losing your best friend.

You got out of bed quickly and set your ice cream down. Roman was watching you with angry eyes. He wanted an answer, he wanted to know what he was getting out this. Dean told him in the car that, what was the point in hoping for something that wasn’t going to happen, that you were only going to go right back to Seth just like you always did.

It angered Roman and he started to think what was the point in even helping, you needed to fix this on your own, he didn’t want to take care of you anymore.

You pulled on your boots and grabbed your jacket, grabbing your keys. You made your way to the door, but stopped when you heard Roman talk.

“I don’t want to take care of you anymore. I’m not getting anything, so I’m not helping anymore!”

“You’re right, Roman. You’re not, but I thought you were my friend. I thought friends were supposed to help there friends! But I guess when they don’t get anything more then just helping someone, it’s not fucking worth it, right!?” With that you opened the door and left. 

You walked out of the hotel and over to your car. You just sat there, staring out into the night. Tears were slowly faring down your cheeks. 

You heard a few knocks on the window on the passenger side. You looked over and seen Dean standing there. 

You unlocked the doors and Dean got in. “What’s the matter, Y/N/N?” Dean asked, looking at you worried.

You wiped away the tears and said. “I’m falling apart. I’m losing everyone.”

Dean looked at you and reseted a hand on your knee giving it a squeezing, before moving his hands up to your face and wiping away the tears you missed.

“It’s gonna be alright.” Dean whispered.


actually feel sick at what happened in Manchester. I was exactly where it happened a few months ago and trust me it’s a busy area (arena, hotel, city centre and train station all next to each other) It’s so scary

anonymous asked:

"It's been too long since you've really smiled" Pls do this with Luke if you don't mind (:

TRIGGER: Mentioning of depression


You laughed at something Ashton said, throwing your head back while leaning into Luke’s side on the dressing room couch, a much needed laugh exiting your mouth.

You’d been having a rough time lately, barely cracking a smile when Luke tried to help you, make you laugh, do anything he could to lighten his girl’s mood. The solemn look you wore around the bus, the arena, the hotel, it was crushing Luke’s heart. He couldn’t bare to see his love be disheartened like this, it was killing him inside.

But you were just feeling down. Everyone went through it occasionally, it was just human nature. Call it psychological, emotional, mental, whatever you want. Exhaustion is what you were feeling and it was tearing you down, piece by piece.

The sun was starting to lose it’s shine, the clouds were getting gloomier, the days longer, the nights unbearable. Everything was starting to lose its colour, fading to black and white, leaving you to view the world through your dull eyes as a blank slate. You didn’t know what was going on with you, but you were just plain tired.

But now you were on tour with your boyfriend of 3 years, and he was going to try his damn hardest to get you to feel better again, feel like the old you again that he fell for.

He tried everything, buying your favourite food, playing your favourite music and dancing around like a maniac, he even asked the boys to help him out.

And now, Ashton didn’t even try and you burst into laughter, surprising you and Luke at the sudden release of happiness.

He looked over at you, still giggling into his chest, making him let out a sigh of content as he lovingly stared down at the girl of his dreams.

“You know,” he whispered, grabbing your attention as you looked up at him, tears prickling your eyes, “it’s been too long since you’ve really smiled.”

You looked down, playing with his antler necklace as he rubbed your back soothingly. “I don’t know, it was just funny.”

He grinned at you, taking in your vulnerable appearance. “All Ash did was flick Michael in the head.”

You let out another laugh, making Luke and the rest of the boys smile at you, finally letting loose and genuinely having a good time. Luke pulled you closer towards him, wrapping his long arms around you as he kissed your forehead, heart warming at the uplift in your mood and the beautiful curve of your mouth finally turning upwards.

Read Between The Lines (7 pt.1)

Chapter 6

Chapter 7.1

ROMAN 

 Roman: How do you do it? 

Jen: Do what?

 Roman: Make me miss you even though I just saw you a couple of hours ago? I’m dying to see you already. 

Jen:  Lol not too long now, just woke up from my nap, about to get in the shower and then I’m making my way.

Roman:  Huuuuuurry!

Jen: You can’t rush perfection. 

Roman: You shouldn’t need that long then

Roman: Text or call me when you’re leaving.

 Jen: Sure thing, see you soon.

“I wanna see too,” Dean said standing behind me.

“See what?” I divided my attention between him and my phone screen. “Can you sit? You’re making me nervous standing there like that,”

“I wanna see whatever’s making you smile like that,” he said flicking me on the shoulder as he sat next to me. “It’s her ain’t it?”

“Who, Dean?” I started putting my phone away. 

Baby girl,”  he said mocking me. “She here yet?”

“Nah,  she wanted to catch up on sleep before she came out to the show.”

“Okay, shoot, so what’s the plan?”

“She’s coming here-”

“You said that already, once she gets here. What’s the plan?”

I hadn’t gone into depth in terms of that plan. I actually didn’t have one. I didn’t think I needed one. I had been too occupied with the excitement of having her watch my match, which also made me too nervous at the same time. She’d started watching wrestling again she said, so I felt the added pressure to put on a bad ass performance live. Just for her.

“I need a plan? I thought it’s all good as long as she’s here? Nah?”

“Shit, who knew our boy could get serious again?” he rested his hand on my shoulder. “I’m just asking because it’s a big step y'know? Milestone for her to meet your friends and take her to your home,”

“I know it is,” I said, the epiphany washing over me. 

I had lied. I hadn’t realised it until he said it. It was a big step and I wasn’t mistaken about how I felt towards Jen. Maybe letting her meet my friends would be too much and overwhelming, especially with the pressure of coming back home with me. Maybe I’d jumped the gun a little. When I invited her out, I hadn’t seen it as her coming to meet my friends but rather coming to spend time with me.

But as I realised it now with Dean bringing it to my attention; this was one of those pivotal moments in a relationship where things took a turn. But could I even call it that with her? Was it a relationship - I mean, I felt like I was in one with her, but nothing was official. We were just two people interested in and seeing each other. 

“It’s not a bad thing,” he said, probably reading my perplexed expression. “I’m just saying I’m proud of you. The last few years haven’t been easy for you and to watch you go from that to this, makes me happy. So I love her already. If I don’t get to meet her tonight, tell her I said thanks. It’s good to have my boy back.”

-  - - - -

“Uce Uce!” Naomi chanted when she saw me passing through the corridors after the show run-through.

I was heading for the club room to relax. It was my ritual before shows to find a solitary space to call friends and family back home and catch up with my normal life. Most times, it was useful for getting into my fighting character.

“What’s up Uce?” she said following me into the room; throwing herself in the leather chair opposite the couch I sat on. 

“Nothing man, chillin’,”

She raised her brow and beamed at me. 

“How’s your boo thing? Where she at? Jimmy said she coming through tonight,”

“Jimmy and his big ass mouth, you had to marry him out of the two?” I said and rolled onto my back, relaxing on the couch. “Yeah, she ‘pose to be here soon,” 

“Don’t be evasive, talk, I wanna know more before I meet her,”

“Y'all need to chill, there’s nothing you need to know,” I sighed. 

“Alright, I see. Ain’t nobody business but yours and your baby?” she smirked, a teasing smirk. 

I knew what that meant too; I could read her like a book. She was the woman I went to with all my problems, we were cool like that, and we went way back. Way back before she and Jimmy became a thing. Despite that, nothing changed, she was still my shoulder and confidant. 

“Am I allowed to ask one question at least?” she probed. I didn’t answer, she didn’t need me to I guess. “Is it serious-serious? I mean I know you said she’s the real deal, but y'know, I’m just curious,”

“What do you wanna know?” I smiled, I knew that response would annoy her. I knew what she wanted to hear. 

“Tsk, stop it. Just answer me and I’ll leave you alone. Are you just having fun with this one or is she the real deal?” 

I closed my eyes, to blank her out. I didn’t want to answer the question; even though I felt I knew the answer. I’d said it before, I’d played around with women, and I knew it was far past time to grow up. I wanted something real, something serious, something with substance. I wanted to wake up to the same person that I went to bed with. Share everything with her. Give her everything. Love with everything. 

But I’d done that before and I knew what that entailed; making myself vulnerable like I did with Mya. So I knew what it felt like to love so much, so hard and get your heartbroken. 

So it’s all fine getting advice from people telling me  “that’s life, you get hurt and move on. Things happen for a reason…”  but if they’ve never been in my shoes, it’s useless to me. I’m the one that got hurt and had to pick up the pieces. Up to now, the emotional scar is there. 

But I couldn’t punish Jen for another woman’s mistake, though I needed to protect my heart too.  Because I also couldn’t stand the thought of her hurting me like Mya did. I feared to think the person I’d become. If I spiralled out of control then when Mya left, I could only imagine myself getting done over twice. I was stuck between the conundrums of wanting love, wanting her and being scared of it, being scared of being hurt again.

But maybe she was different and I hoped so because everyone deserves a chance. 

“You don’t wanna talk about it?” Naomi treaded carefully. 

“Mhhh-hmmm, not now, let me at least get through this week with her,” I argued. 

Maybe this way I could see how the week with her went and then I could decide whether she was worth taking the risk for. 

But for now, I realised; I had to keep her away from everyone. Especially with their probing questions. I didn’t need them imposing their optimism and relationship goals they had in mind for me, on her. The last thing I needed were outsiders chasing her away.
______________

 JEN 

Meeting new people was my forte and job. I did this for living but I couldn’t understand why I felt so anxious and nervous about meeting Roman at the arena. I knew it entailed meeting more than a couple of colleagues, and that scared me in ways I couldn’t imagine. 

I’d started following wrestling again and wasn’t a stranger to forums and interviews. It was all over the wrestlers’ interviews that they always felt like a “family” by always being on the road together. That worried me; the thought of meeting a large group of friends who were like family to him. I knew I’d have to impress more than a few to get their approval. And that I wanted to do because I really liked him. But being a naturally nervous, insecure and socially anxious person…it didn’t mix well together. 

I sat in the back of the ride he’d sent to pick me up from the hotel to the arena, wondering if I had any valid last minute excuses for a no-show. I wasn’t home so I couldn’t fake an illness successfully without him checking on me. Besides, I was gonna be sharing a bed with him tonight, so that’s out of the question. 

More so, it was too late now. I’d flown too many miles to chicken out. So I did the inevitable and texted him as we approached the arena, my stomach turning. 

 Jen: I’m here. 

I waited nervously, impatiently for a reply. I just had to suck it up and make the most of this. I had to treat it like an experience; take whatever from it. That had been my mantra for this whole thing with Roman from the start. Whatever happens happens.

I was yet to figure out whether that was a positive or negative outlook on life.

Breaking my train of thoughts, my phone started vibrating on my lap. It was him calling.

“Hey,” he said excitedly. 

All those nerves that had me tense and rigid, dissipated at the sound of his voice. I felt myself relax, looking forward to seeing him again. I’d only spent a couple of hours with him this morning, mostly so because he picked me from the airport. He dropped me at the hotel he was staying in and kissed me bye as he had to shoot off for the run-through. It worked out well, because my body was shutting down from the lack of sleep. I needed a few hours of sleep to get into the zone. 

“Sorry, just got your message now,” he said. “I’m coming to get you,”

“Okay, see you in a minute,” I said before we cut off the line.

I imagined I’d be waiting a long time for Roman, but within minutes, I saw his unmistakable tall and burly figure heading towards me. He was dressed in all black, his fighting armour pants, boots and a hoody. How a simple combo looked so good, was beyond me. 

I wasn’t patient enough to wait it out, I wanted to be in his arms already. I didn’t have enough of it earlier, it’d all been a blur from the moment I stepped off the plane.

I grabbed my small cross-body purse and opened the door, sprinting towards him as fast as I could, jumping into his arms when we met. 

He laughed as he caught me, swinging me around, not caring about the curious passer-bys. 

“Hi again,” he said as he set me down. 

“Hi,” I smiled, my arms around his neck. 

He ducked his head, leaning in and mushing our lips together, it was like we were replaying this morning properly, with no rush or worry. Our arms wrapped around each other, clinging tightly onto another as we spoke to each other through our actions and touches. 

“How do you make even a hoodie look good?” I pulled back for a second and asked him. 

“Well, what can I say?” he joked, before I pushing him away playful. “I’m kidding. I had to grab something quick, otherwise I’d have turned up to get you shirtless,”

“I wouldn’t have complained,” 

“Is that so?” he asked before leaning down to kiss me again. “I have nothing on underneath it if that helps,”

“Mhhh, you’re not supposed to tell,” I smiled against his lips before we fell into another medley of kisses. “Unless you want something to be done about it,”

I managed to sneak my hand underneath the hoodie to see if he’s telling the truth. He was. (Damn you mother nature.) I raked my fingers down his abs as he deepened the kiss, little did I know, that was one of his weaknesses. He groaned in my mouth and pulled back; removing my hands from inside his hoodie. 

“Damn…don’t be starting nothing girl. I can’t be rolling into my match with that on my mind. It’s a family show damnit,”

“Am I gonna distract you?” I asked, an alluring voice in action and I don’t know why I was punishing the man like that knowing that sex was off the agenda for a few days. 

“You know you are,” 

I wondered if he liked to have sex before or after his matches to let off steam. I made a mental note to ask him later. 

“I won’t look at you,” 

“Come on, I gotta get dressed, I’m on in fifteen,” he said taking my hand into his and leading the way. “Yeah, but I’m gonna look, that’s the problem,”

“Well sir, that is a problem,” 

“Indeed, plus, you look extra cute today. That beauty nap did you good. You should take more of those,”

“Shut up,” I pushed him away from me again. 

“I’m plaaaaying, damn, why you gotta be so rough?” 

“You liked it,”

“Yeah,” he cheesed and walked back next to me; this time, his arm resting around my waist. “But you know, don’t pull that stunt again around these parts, could get you in a lot of trouble,”

“Mhhh, I like trouble, maybe that’s what I’m going for,”

“You wanna get in trouble?” he asked, I nodded. “So you wanna get punished?”

“Hurt me and I’ll scream,”

He laughed, pulling me tighter into him, “Well I wanna hear you scream my name all night honey,” 

Oh

He paused too, “Not like that, I meant watching my match because you my cheerleader tonight,” he said, not even flustered, not one bit. That’s confidence right there. “But either interpretations of that comment are welcome by the way,”

“Mhhh, that depends if I’m in the mood, for both,” I teased him. 

“Oh after my match, you’ll be doing one of those. So…you ready for this?”

“Seeing you all sweaty and rough handling other guys? Hell yeah I’m ready,”


Chapter 7.2

I’m trying to find the words to describe what I feel about this tour but.. I can’t. There’s just so much.
I remember that May 5th, I was going to bed and checking tumblr to see if there had been any news yet, but it was too early. So I woke up the next day and I remember having breakfast looking for pictures or videos. I remember being on the car on my way to school and seeing the light-up bracelets thing. I watched two videos that morning, one of them was of the whole stadium lit up, and I think the other one was of I Knew You Were Trouble. I remember I had my mouth wide open, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. I also remember looping a video that had mashed up the MUCH COOLER THAN MINE and the AND WE RUUUUN every day for like two weeks lmao. And being sad “knowing” that I wouldn’t get to go to this tour just like it happened with all of the other tours.
I remember my mom saying “Caro.. I’m considering taking you to the US to see Taylor” and how much I smiled when she said those words but at the same time not getting my hopes up because I still thought it was impossible. I remember looking at the ticket prices of almost every show and trying to buy Pit tickets but not being able to. And then finding good tickets for the Miami show. I recall buying them on June 13th. Having them in my hands. I would see Taylor. I finally could say that.
I remember counting down the days. I remember checking the countdown thing I had in my phone and seeing “280 days” and suddenly it was 20 days. I remember getting on a plane knowing that I was getting closer and closer to my idol, and to my dreams coming true. I remember getting to the hotel and seeing the arena from the window, all lit up. I remember when the trucks arrived -oh my, I was dying of excitement that day. I remember the day coming closer and closer until it was the day. I was finally going to see the woman who had been my idol for more than three years. I remember going to the venue in the morning and seeing some groups of people already and my stomach felt like a rock because I was so nervous and excited. And telling my mother to wear her keds instead of the high heels she wanted to put on because it would be a long long day and we would have to run. And being at the queue of the merch shop trying to find a picture of Emma aka @taylorslistofexlovers aka my internet best friend so my mom could help me find her and suddenly hearing a loud “CARO!!” and feeling someone’s arms around me (side note: I have tears in my eyes as I’m writing this). I remember meeting @miserablemagics and her squad. And finally getting into the venue and realizing it was so huge and I was in the same place as Taylor was which had never happened to me before. And going to the Taylor Nation booth and meeting Tania ( @tanialovestaylor ) and her being so nice to me. And Vance Joy playing and me starting to realize that it was about to start. I remember listening to the songs waiting for Feel so Close to come up at any minute. And talking (even more) to Emma and hugging her every two seconds because I couldn’t believe I was physically with her. I remember when Feel so Close came up -WHAT A MOMENT. I started to dance and I remember screaming to my mother things like “TAYLORS COMING OKAY” and the happiness on my mother’s face because she had always wanted me to see me happy just like in that moment (side note two: in 2013 for my birthday she posted on my facebook wall and she wrote she hoped that all my dreams came true and she specially mentioned going to Taylor’s concert someday). When Taylor came out I didn’t record it. I wanted to fully live the moment. And I did. I danced until the very end of the concert. I had fun, screamed, jumped, danced, sang. I remember her looking at me and smiling during Shake it Off. And I remember forgetting (pretty ironic, huh?) about loft all night and really enjoying the show. I seriously can’t thank Taylor enough for all of these memories I’ll always keep in my heart.
I remember sitting outside the venue and my mother wanting to get me into loft ilegally lol, and me saying “It seems like it just wasn’t meant to be mom, it’s okay. I still had the best night of my life”. And feeling kinda sad but also not being able to stop smiling because it had happened.
I recall being at the airport, with my light-up bracelet on, thinking about what had happened the night before.
Taylor, thanks for inspiring me, for giving me something so special to share with my mother, for being so nice to everyone, for always being there for me even if it’s through music, for following me on here, for making me so happy. I love you so much.
PS if any of you actually took the time to read this I love you and thank you!