hot. damn. mess

The Library - ethiobird ( @hedarey)

(Words: 55,190) (Chapters: 5/5)

You certainly come across intriguing personalities every so often when you tend bar. None quite so intriguing as the lone girl with cascading chestnut hair sitting at the end of the bar, drinking a whiskey neat and reading a book, however.

Except, wait, that’s your new co-worker.

or

The College Bar AU in which Clarke is the Mom Friend bartender, Lexa is the new hire, and everyone is really just a hot damn mess. Shot of Jameson, anyone?

Let's call a spade a spade. Greys was a hot damn mess this season.

This season was just plot holes and dropped story lines galore. Owen still doesn’t know the real reason Amelia is scared to have a baby. Meredith and Nathan had like no interaction for legit 10 episodes then all of a sudden they’re together and now they’re done? (Telling you now Shonda will have them back together by the end of next season). Jackson and April had that random hook up in that random standalone episode and now they’ve had zero interactions since then? Jackson and Maggie are suddenly a thing? And don’t even get me started on Jolex cause of all the couples on this show Shonda has screwed them the most and dropped the ball on them so many times I’ve lost count. They were supposed to get actual storylines for the last 3 seasons but Shonda keeps dropping the ball. Like they’ve barely interacted all season and look I get that Camilla was pregnant and had to go on maternity leave but do better Shonda. How many women have been pregnant on this show and still managed to have storylines? Hell Arizona was pregnant 3 damn times! And why even bother introducing this stupid storyline with Jo’s husband if it’s not gonna go anywhere? Either end them for good next season or put them back together. Enough of this back and forth limbo nonsense. DeLucca was useless we all know Jo doesn’t want to be with him why is he even still here? Ughhhhhh so many plot holes. This season was literally useless. At least Minnick is gone. Bless the lord for that Arizona who has been ooc since Callie skipped town deserves better. DO BETTER NEXT TIME SHONDA

Originally posted by trapstrblog

Me: I’m not really a fan of Loki but I’ll see Thor: Ragnarok because I love Thor!

Me:*watches teaser trailer; sees Loki do the flippy thing and melts*

Originally posted by eilizabeth-olsen

Me: *after trailer* okay… I’m going for Thor AND Loki because hot damn Loki has messed me up! I’m gonna write some more Loki x reader stuff, what a fucking babe!

Imagine a boy with a quickly growing belly. Inside him are many tiny eggs growing bigger and bigger until his belly is painfully stretched out to the max and there’s no more room inside of him so the sheer pressure forces out a few of the eggs, all connected by a strong umbilical cord that cannot be cut and now dangling out of him. It’s a temporary relief until the eggs inside of him grow bigger again thanks to the freed space until the pressure is too great again. Repeat for hours as the eggs grow bigger and bigger and more painful to birth. At one point, they get so big that to push one out, the next one is pulled into crowning so his hole is always stretched out, tearing and bleeding as he is going insane with pain. Then, with just a handful of eggs left in his belly, they grow too big for him to push out, one stuck in crowning position, the other stretching his belly. And yet, the eggs are not done growing…

THANKS TO WHOEVER SENT THIS IN HOT DAMN

Kdrama Review: Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo

Master Kdrama rec list.

Series: Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo
Episodes: 20 (~1hr each)
Genres: Romance, Tragedy, Drama, Historical/Sageuk, Political, Fantasy, Comedy
Spoilers in the Review: For the first episode

If You Like, You’ll Like: Scarlet Hearts (parent story/cdrama), Prince Zuko at peak angst in ATLA, Grisha Trilogy, Fushigi Yuugi, whoever wanted to watch a Shakespearean tragedy with hot princes that wear color-coded robes, Moonlight Drawn by Clouds, The Moon That Embraces the Sun, time travel, Political Intrigue, reverse harem trope, Empress Ki

Rank: 9/10

“In your next life, will you remember me?”

Keep reading

4

i can’t believe god is a woman

sassamyblake  asked:

syd tell us the story of u and pizza girl again

alright children gather round.

one day, long ago, my awkward ass went to dominos - with my fucking grandfather might i add - looking a hot damn mess in a giant cat sweatshirt. and i was told to order for everyone so I’m chilling out at the counter when an adorable goddess of a woman comes to the register. and i honest to god could not tell you a single word i said for the next ten minutes because my brain fried itself and i when ton awkward autopilot.

but they were short staffed so it took forever to get the food, but i stayed up there talking to her, and she was so sweet and i guess she found my social ineptitude charming or something because she wrote her number on one of the napkins and put it on top of the pizza boxes as we went to leave.

anyway, we texted like barely over the next week and a half, just a little here and there because it was the first week of classes and we were both busy af. and since I’m but more charming over text message, she asked me out to GET FUCKING PIZZA. are you seeing why we call her pizza girl??

anyway, we went to this place where you like make your own pizza and you pick all the toppings and stuff and it was really cute and my clumsy self got fucking pizza sauce on my shirt and the conversation was awkward because we’re both sucky at being humans and honestly it was a typical awkward first date i guess but we still had fun. 

and then she was walking me to the bus stop because i live off campus and I’m a loser without a car and on the way there she grabbed my hand and i think my heart deadass exploded because i don’t know if you guys fully grasp how awkward i am and how horrible i am at dates and human interaction, but even this sad awkward first date of embarrassment was the best id ever suffered through and i for real was just shook. but i was also very happy because a cute girl was holding my hand.

and she sat at the bus stop with me for a few minutes and when the bus pulled up we got all flustered again, but then she kissed me and YALL LET ME TELL YOU. THIS ADORABLE LITTLE ANGEL OF A PERSON TASTED LIKE FUCKING PIZZA SAUCE AND MUSHROOMS AND IT WASNT LIKE WE MADE OUT IN FRONT OF THE BUS BUT HOT DAMN IT WAS GREAT.

anyway, i got home and let her know i made it and then she asked me out or ice cream in october - and we live in fucking oregon so october is like 24/7 cold rain. but i went anyway because a.) ya girl rarely gets a date so its not like i was gonna say no and b.) she’s really cute and i liked  her a lot.

so i guess from then on we ate pizza and hung out at coffee shops. and one day i was having a particularly shitty time (which i believe, can you imagine, was because of antis sending me hate or some tumblr related shit) so this muffin girl got me voodoo doughnuts and brought them to me on campus before class because she is a blessing.

and we watched the x-files together and she’s the scully to my crazy ass mulder and we laugh about my ex’s small dick together and my dog loves her more than me and she puts up with my mood swings and my crazy 4am texts about aliens but most importantly she gets me discount dominos pizza <3