Hot Rod (2007) Sentence Starter Meme:

The people spoke and I listened… :)

“My name is _____ , and I like to party!” 
“Oh, my God, shut up! Okay? I’m just gonna do it for you.“
“I said you look shitty, GOODNIGHT _____!”
“Um, I was gonna ask you who you think would win in a fight between… a grilled cheese sandwich and a taco.“
“Well, I think the grilled cheese sandwich - in a fair fight. But if it was prison rules, I’d put my money on the taco.“
“I’m freakin pumped! I’ve been drinking green tea all goddamn day!“
“I used to be legit. I was too legit. I was too legit to quit. but now I’m not legit. I’m unlegit. And for that reason, I must quit.“
“I’m kinda grumpy today, dude. I didn’t get a lot of sleep last night. I was having those dreams again. “
“I’d rather die than live in a world where I can’t kick your ass.“
“Well he won’t be smiling… WHEN I MURDER HIM!!” 
“God I go to church every goddamn Sunday! You gonna bring the demons out of me!“
“Have fun being married to SATAN!”
“Have I ever shown you a picture of my dead dad?” 
“Haha, I’m just kidding. I could hear you. It was just really mean!” 
“Cool beans.” 
“You look like a giant eagle with fire all around you, and you’ve got a mountain for a face.“
“I’m guessing that’s the drugs.” 
“Balls, man! We just ran over a small bus. This really small bus, we just ran over it.“
“I’m going in for a Vitamin Water, should I make that dos?”
“Well, maybe I’ll pick up a box of dong bags so we can knock boots later.“
“Yoo-hoo, shit heads, I found this bag of fireworks in the men’s restroom. Would you guys like to light them off?“
“You know, pools are perfect for holding water…“
“I’m not a kid, I’m a man. I am gonna get you better, and then I’m gonna beat you to death!“
“I needed to think about last night. So I galloped into a wooded glen, and after punch-dancing out my rage and suffering an extremely long and very painful fall, I realized what has to be done.“
“You have only to believe if you wish to achieve. That rhymed. Unintentional.“
“I, one time, manned a flamethrower.“
“Of course it’s cool. It’s awesome as shit.“
“Ancestors protect me.“
“Who cares what anyone thinks?“
“Hey _______, you chode! I owe you a shot in the nuts…!”
“You know I have a hormone disorder!“
“Life is pain - we’ve got to scrape the joy from it every chance we get.“
“Ohhh when you’re going on a date, and you put on a shirt! And you ride your bike to the daaaaate!”
“You guys, the bathroom here is nuts!“
“He choked on some pie. He really wanted to win that contest…” 
“Whatever happened to “Live as a team. Die as a team”?“
“Who am I supposed to build ramps for? Who am I supposed to build ramps for now?“
“The dog walked itself home, ate a pizza and took a nap.“
“Never sneak up on a man who’s been in a chemical fire.“
“That shatters my entire universe.“
“Now I don’t want to say that kiss was hot, but if the boner police are here, I want a lawyer!“
“Please believe, I do my laundry with no pants on!“
“I’m going to get you better, you old sack of shit, and then I’m going to uncork the ass beating of a lifetime on you! And you will respect me!“
“Is there a Tai Chi move that would make a grown man crap his pants and not know why?“
“Oh, man, he hit his ass with a parking cone! Nice.“
“Point is, if you don’t sit down with someone and really talk and get to know them you’ll never find those things out. So what do you say? Wanna make this thing official?“
“What’s going on? Is this some sort of interactive theatre art piece?“
“It’s bouncing around the Web like a beachball at a Nickelback concert.“
“_____? Have you seen my hip pads?”
“I’m officially kicking off Phase Two: Operation Fiscal Jackhammer.“
“Who wants to see me do a big-ass stunt?“