hot dog cake

Whoa...

I had a dream that I met @thatsthat24 and many shenanigans ensued–everything from goofing off at a parade to sharing a questionable selection of sushi after swimming in the pool at a Japanese restaurant–but the part that stands out the most was when he asked me to change the sheets on the guest bedroom bed before I left his family’s farm, because I’d had the audacity to eat carrot cake while sitting on the bed and there were crumbs now everywhere

I have never felt like I personally betrayed anyone more than I did by getting carrot cake crumbs on Thomas Sanders’ parents’ guest bedsheets.

I woke up an hour ago and I’m still feeling some residual guilt about it. 

Food (and class) in Harry Potter A (lengthy) guide for fans who aren’t British

After another user asked me some questions about British food as it appears in Harry Potter I decided to make a post about it, as no doubt other foreign readers have similar questions. I will talk about EVERYTHING so sorry if you have to scroll through loads of stuff you know to find what you want, but I have written it to be accessible to literally anyone and I don’t want to assume people know what something is just because I do.

Also, it was impossible to make the post without referencing class. The fact that it was impossible only goes to show how it’s probably impossible to understand the books in depth without an understanding of class in Britain. The whole texts are encoded with references to class which are so subtle (much like class itself) that even I, who grew up being encoded in the same way, had to analyse the texts to find them. At some point I’ll make a post about just class, but for now we’ll stick to the light-hearted topic of food!

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Boyfriend Bambam
  • Meme couple
  • Dabs and whips constantly
  • Never shuts up
  • Wants your attention 25/8
  • Gets all pouty when you don’t give him your attention
  • Once you do, he’ll give you a bunch of kisses and tight bear hugs
  • Carnival dates!
  • Would win you a huge stuffed bear
  • Is scared of all the rides that you guys go on
  • So you’d have to hold the baby’s hand throughout every ride
  • Grabbing some food together
  • Corn dogs, hot dogs, funnel cakes, popcorn, large drinks for you to share
  • Bambam would want to feed you everything
  • You can’t refuse or else he’ll show off his non-resisting puppy face
  • Matching heart necklaces
  • That would actually be Bambam’s Valentine’s Day gift to you
  • Because he’s cheesy, romantic, and adorable all wrapped into one
  • Loud and noisy af
  • Always begging for you to come snuggle with him
  • If you don’t, he’ll hunt you down and carry you to his room and tickle you
  • Because tickle fights are one of his favorite things to do with you
  • Besides embracing you in his arms and placing wet kisses all over your face
  • Especially your lips
  • He loves your lips
  • He could kiss them all day
  • Which he already does nonstop
  • Tries to act like a bad boy to impress you
  • Even though it never works
  • He’s a dweeb pfft
  • But you love that dweeb nonetheless
  • He would want to take you out on dates every single day
  • You want a break from all these dates but “Sleep” doesn’t seem to be in Bambam’s dictionary
  • He would drag you to every place that he wants to go to for dates
  • “Y/N, hurry up~ We’re almost to the place.”
  • “The place” actually turns out to be some fancy Thai restaurant
  • You would be shook at the place and how nice it is
  • Then you would ask how Bambam could even afford this place bc damn it was expensive as hell
  • He would just laugh and say that the price doesn’t matter, it’s worth spending a day with you, his one true love (how cheesy)
  • Always tells you jokes to make you laugh
  • He loves your laugh, he thinks it’s the most cutest thing he has ever heard in his entire life
  • He’s also a really cheesy babe
  • Would tell you cheesy pickup lines to be romantic
  • Even though it’s cringy af but you find it adorable that he’s trying so hard
  • Smug sometimes
  • Also a teasing shit
  • Girl group dances
  • He would dance to “Touch My Body” by Sistar for your entertainment
  • Comedy movie dates
  • Cuddling on the couch and eating candy while watching the movie
  • Laying your head on his chest while he drapes his arm over your shoulder
  • Clingy Bambam 75% of the time
  • Okay, more like 90% of the time
  • Gets jealous over every guy that talks to you
  • He would get all pouty and ask you if you think the other guy is better than you
  • You find it cute that he’s jealous but you tell him to stop being so insecure and that you love him and only him
  • Leading him to be flustered
  • He would jump onto you and place wet smooches all over your face and say “I Love You” x100
  • Overprotective Bambam
  • He would be like a father figure sort of
  • Okay well more like a big brother
  • Even though he’s your boyfriend so that would be weird if he was your brother/father
  • Would dedicate a Chris Brown song to you
  • A romantic song ofc
  • Even make up a choreography to the song and dance for you
  • Soft pecks on the lips
  • Which would soon turn heated
  • Lowkey kinky
  • Idk if I wanna head into nsfw things…???
  • Tbh let’s save that for next time ohohoho ;))
  • SnapChat spams
  • His Instagram page would mostly be just pictures of you or of you and him together
  • He loves you so much, you basically own all of his social media profiles
  • Would comment cute stuff on all of your IG updates
  • “Look at my baby, omo!~ You’re so beautiful, I’m so lucky to have you, princess”
  • Spams your PM’s with cute snaps of him and cheesy yet romantic texts
  • The kissy face emoji would be his favorite emoji
  • He sends it to you all the time
  • Showers you with kisses before bed
  • Spams you with good night texts
  • Would want to be the one to say “I Love You” last
  • You guys would get into a huge fight over the phone, constantly saying “I Love You”
  • Until you finally give in, letting Bambam be the one to say it last
  • Only because you love it when he tells you he loves you
  • Because it’s absolutely true <3

Originally posted by ohohobi

Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp sentence starters

92starters
feel free to change gender pronouns
‘read-more’ added for length

  • “Tell me a story!”
  • “Donuts! Hot dogs! Pie! Cakes! ARGH! Why can’t I stop thinking about food?!”
  • “Did you mistake me for a cuddly and adorable toy just now? Don’t worry. When you’re as cute as I am, you get used to that kind of thing happening all the time.”
  • “You sure know how to get someone’s attention!”
  • “You’d really give this to me? I must be the luckiest girl in the world!”
  • “The longer and more annoying your method of brewing coffee is, the better it tastes. It’s science!”
  • “Getting tired, _____? Just remember there’s no harm in taking a breather.”
  • “Oh, man… You’re making me feel feelings again. Haven’t felt those in years.”
  • “No complaints here! I’m just taking a load off, breathing in the fresh air, and watching the world go by…”
  • “Well, well, well… What can I do for you?”
  • “Should we invent something? Destroy something? Invent something that destroys things?”
  • “Wow, you take the cake when it comes to friendship. Mmm… cake.”
  • “Do you have some new gossip?”
  • “When you think of winter, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? For me it’s sitting in front of a big ol’ roaring fire, eating marshmallows. Don’t judge me!”
  • “Hmm… I just can’t decide what to do today…”
  • “I’ve got two words for you: you rule… a lot. Wait, was that more than two?”
  • “Ever had a song stuck in your head for so long you started to wonder if a tiny singer was living in there? I wouldn’t mind it so much if he coughed up some rent.”
  • “I’ve been lazing away around here for hours. What can I say? It’s my favorite way to spend the day!”
  • “Hey! You can cook, can’t you? Excellent! ‘Cause I can eat. We’re a match made in heaven.”
  • “I can only think of one thing that’d make it even better… MORE SNACKS!”
  • “I see you’re still out and about, _____. I like the way you think.”
  • “What are you doing up this late? Nevermind… People in glass houses shouldn’t call the kettle black and all that.”
  • “Hey, _____… What’s the most special place in the world to you?”
  • “Burning the midnight oil, eh, _____? Oh, come on. It used to be a common expression!”
  • “Bah, whatever. Don’t listen to your headphones too loud, kiddo, or you’ll end up like me!”
  • “You know, _____, I know being friends with me is a gift in itself… but here’s a little something to sweeten the deal!”
  • “We don’t always have to talk about training, you know. There’s plenty of other stuff goin’ on!  Like… um… You know… How ‘bout the weather? …Uhhhhh… Sorry! I’m out of my element!”
  • “Hey, what’s up? Something on your mind?”
  • “Listen, _____—I just want to warn you that I have a tendency to be a little… needy. It’s not that I’m super selfish or anything like that! I’m always happy to share with a friend. I’ve just found the best way to make friends is to ask them for stuff!”
  • “When I really think about it, I realize you always do so much for me. That’s why I prepared you this little thank-you gift! So… thank you!”
  • “Whoa, you’re giving this to me? That’s amazing!”
  • “Traveling is nothing if not entertaining, am I right? You never know what kinds of peeps you’re gonna run into out in the world.”
  • “Whenever I meet someone new, I can’t help but wonder, “What’s your story?”“
  • “You’ve been such a big help! Let me know when I can return the favor.”
  • “Hey, you! What are you standing around here for? Go have some fun already!”
  • “You did it! And it’s not easy to get your hands on stuff like this.”
  • “Wanna hear something funny? …Uh-oh. I totally forgot what I was gonna say. That’s too bad. Guess it wasn’t so funny after all!”
  • “Oh, man. The ocean is just so magnificent and powerful at night. Like a perfectly executed burpee…”
  • “You know what I’ve figured out? That traveling is a great way to make new friends.”
  • “It’s a beautiful day! Isn’t it, _____? Where I come from, they call this “favor weather”!”

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When I was a kid, I used to fish a lot (warning:graphic descriptions of injury to animals)

My uncle showed me how, and whenever I went to stay with him and my aunty at their caravan, I’d spend the majority of the time sitting by the side of the course fishing lake with my float on the water, waiting for perch fish to take a bite.

Now I had a lot of bad incidents which sort of phased me over that period, I once used a hook that was too small, and it went all the way down the body of the fish, and since I was too scared to put my finger down the fish’ mouth and pull it out, my uncle had to just rip it out, killing the fish.

Another time I used a hook that was too big, it went into the fish’ mouth and came out of its eyeball, that fish we put back, and obviously it would have been blind on one side, and likely didn’t survive in its home environment because of that.

Now I feel ill thinking back to these occasions currently, and I felt slightly bad at the time, however there was one incident where even at the time, my blood boiled.

On this occasion, as usual, I sat and caught a fish, it was a fair size for perch (I forget the weight), but it was a regular catch, the hook went in the mouth and came out of the cheek, easy to remove and at the time I was proud of it.
Another kid who was fishing there with a group of his friends came over and asked to hold it whilst his friends crowded around me, I allowed it, but I told him it was only for a short time because obviously the fish couldn’t breath (in my head I was genuinely against animal cruelty somehow).
So the kid takes the fish, and immediately hurls it as far and as high as he could, it hit the lake with a force that must have killed it (or at least I honestly hope it did, I hope the fish didn’t have to survive that).

Now at the time, I was livid, I was angry beyond words, how could he be so unnecessarily cruel to an innocent animal? An animal he had only just seen and that had never done anything wrong to him, he must be a complete asshole, right?

Now here’s the part I missed at the time, I HAD LITERALLY BEEN STABBING FISH ALL DAY.

I had been stabbing small creatures like maggots and worms, leaving them underwater for hours, sat and watched a float until it began to go under, and at that point I would stab the fish, drag it out of it’s natural environment into a cold and bright area where it couldn’t breath, removed the hook, and released it back into the water with a brand new wound and what must have been a chronic phobia of eating.

And I did all of that in the name of a hobby, but that was fine! Because that part was normal in society! People fished all the time and so I couldn’t be doing anything wrong, but throwing the fish? That was cruel, inhumane, and something I could never do.

I simply did not see the ill logic of it all, what I was doing was unnecessary, yes it was normalised in society, but I could have quite happily chosen a different hobby? There are thousands of hobbies out there that I could have opted for, but because of the way society views fishing, I saw no wrong in it at all.

I no longer think that way.

And the same goes for food. You see videos of factory farm workers punching, kicking, and just generally abusing animals, and it boils your blood, that’s because as I have always been, you’re genuinely against animal cruelty.

But here’s the important part, you are still paying for them to be stabbed.

And that is the effect of society! They’ve normalised it to the point where you see no wrong in it at all, and people throw out the same arguments about canines, evolution, B12, the food chain, etc in order to justify this behaviour when confronted about it, but after all of these arguments have been refuted (easily, I promise you, spare yourself the time), it always boils down to ‘I don’t really know why I eat animals, but it tastes good’.

The answer is, that you eat animals because society tells you to, it tells you that you need meat to be healthy, despite a vegan diet containing every single nutrient your body needs, and despite a vegan diet vastly reducing your chances of contracting all the biggest medical killers (heart disease, cancer, strokes, diabetes, etc).
It tells you that vegans are weak and pathetic, despite the emergence of vegan, world class athletes now being a daily occurrence.
And mostly, it tells you that eating dead animals is necessary, despite the fact that as there were thousands of other hobbies for me to choose from, there are millions of other food sources for you to choose from.

And on top of that, you can still have everything you have now! You can have burgers, pizzas, hot dogs, barbecues, ice cream, cakes, brownies, fudge, I mean it when I say literally everything you have now.
And you’re likely sitting thinking ‘ew they’ll be vegan versions though’ but that is how society wants you to feel! The animal agricultural industries have paid big money into advertising and changing federal policy, specifically to make it seem like veganism is the unnecessary choice, that compassion and empathy are unnecessary and extreme, and that relentless killing and endless cruelty is perfectly normal.
Surely you can see the disconnect here, regarding society’s actions and society’s alleged beliefs.
Now I’m not asking you to go vegan (I am lol, but you don’t have to take my word for it), all I ask is that you take a step back, and evaluate. Look for the meat adverts, look how meat centric society actually is, and look for how society views vegans in general, and for what? Empathy? Compassion? Trying to make the world a better place?

And then simply do some research! YouTube has tons of educational videos, there are thousands of educational posts on tumblr if you follow vegan blogs. All I ask is that you do some research, and see which side of the story makes more sense to you.

I’m here to help if you need it! ✌️🌱

I don’t really want to throw my own two cents on the recent Splatfest out here, but guess I will anyway.

People keep talking about how “it was always ketchup vs ketchup so the team never fought mayo to contribute to the win percentage”. Like? Who do you think mayo was fighting? I only ever fought other mayos maybe a few times, mostly I was fighting ketchups. Just because you specifically weren’t fighting mayos, doesn’t mean other ketchups weren’t. And, to be fair, the percentages were really close. I do still feel like the scoring system needs to be reworked, but that’s another problem. Unfortunately, with such a big popularity discrepancy, you’re going to end up fighting your own team a lot. That doesn’t always mean you’re going to lose (marshmallows vs hot dogs, cake vs ice cream, etc.).

Also, no one on ice cream was complaining about all the ice cream vs ice cream matches when they won, and it was close to the same popularity percentage.

Yesterday was Norway’s National Day! :D We had a good time with hot dogs, cake, strawberries and cream, ice cream, a good movie and good company! I hope all of my Norwegian followers had a lovely celebration, too! 

Simon Says

[Word Count: 5708]

I can’t really blame my brother for being the way he is. Simon has had events conspire against him to shape what he has become.

Simon has always been a queer child since birth. I was six when he was born and even I knew something was different about him. He was quiet and not just in the normal sense. My parents could never tell if he was hungry or needed a new diaper because he never screamed or cried about it. He seemed to internalize everything at an early age.

One event in particular stands glaringly in my mind as the catalyst for his condition.

There was a birthday party in the summer I turned ten. I don’t think I’ll ever forget it and I’m sure Simon thinks about it every day. It was for a neighborhood girl who was closer in age to Simon than me but my attendance was made mandatory by my loving parents.

It took place in the backyard of the birthday girl, a snotty little pig of a girl with pink overalls and new sketchers. There were dozens of kids and for each kid there were approximately two parents. Lots of kids, even more adults. I still wonder to this day how no one saw it happen.

My brother was sitting at the swing, looking at the ground. He was always looking at things and thinking about stuff. He never really talked unless he had a question he couldn’t answer himself. He was drinking a soda from a can with a little straw and dripping it purposefully on the anthill underneath his feet. Feeding the insect soldiers on a hot day seemed like a normal thing for a him to do.

I watched as the birthday girl and her friend, a mousy girl with long blonde hair and glasses, stopped next to him to talk. I didn’t think anything of it really until I saw the girls walking away, the brunette laughing, the blonde guiltily looking back over her narrow shoulders. Simon’s soda was poured onto the anthill, drowning some of the creatures and destroying their home. He looked devastated.

Feeling bad for my brother, I brought him a plate of cake with a cheap plastic fork. It was a piece that was more cake than frosting, the way he liked it. He took if from my hands gently and ate it slowly.

“Thank you Tyler,” he said quietly.

“She’s just being a brat because it’s her birthday,” I told him. “Don’t let it bother you.”

He nodded his head but I could see that he was still upset. He liked insects and bugs. He liked taking care of them and keeping them in jars with plenty of sustenance. He liked keeping them safe. I patted his shoulder and left him alone awhile. After all, he wasn’t a big talker on the best of days.

It wasn’t long before I saw the little blonde girl come back to Simon as he ate. She looked contrite. It seemed to me she was apologizing to Simon and I even saw a smile on his face as they talked for a while. They were getting along. Anyone could see that as they whispered back and forth, little smiles and laughter shared between them.

An hour passed by and I stopped thinking about my brother. After all, I was still a kid myself and I cared more about me than anyone else. I ate hot dogs and cake and ice cream. I would have played in the pool if it were something more than a foot deep inflatable monstrosity for babies and infants. Eventually, I found myself a corner to play my Gameboy in for a few minutes before I heard a noise. A noise I’ve never heard before and hoped I’d never hear again.

The heart-wrenching scream of a distraught mother.

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