Season one of Dirk Gently except that, just beneath the surface, all of the psychic murder children are eldritch horrors.

They seem just a bit too interested when their gaze flickers over you, and there’s something almost predatory in their smile (even Dirk’s too-toothy grin). There’s something in Bart’s careless movements, and the Rowdy 3′s hive mind, and the way that bizarre and frightening states of disaster follow Dirk wherever he goes.

(Just before the breakout RIggins finds a book about cosmicism, finds a name for what he’s felt for years, the sense that ordinary life is a thin shell over a reality that is so alien and abstract in comparison that merely contemplating it would damage the sanity of the ordinary person.)

There’s a reason why Blackwing wants them all back so badly.

John Carpenter’s ‘The Thing’ by Dan Mumford

Rose Tint My World: A Protection Spell

The Rocky Horror Picture Show has been an integral part of my life as a queer person and I wanted to blend that in with my identity as a witch as well. And what better way to pay homage to the film’s subversive nature than to use roses for something other than a love spell? So here’s a protection spell built around a rose.

To get pumped up and energized, listen to “A Wild and an Untamed Thing” from the film before you cast this.


·         Whole red rose (fake is fine)

·         Red candle

·         Cayenne pepper

·         Paper

·         Yellow and black writing utensils

·         Red lipstick

·         White felt

·         Rubber band



1.      Create two sigils, one for the affirmation “I am protected” and one for “I’m a bee with a deadly sting”. Any way you typically make sigils is fine and there’s plenty of resources and tutorials on tumblr if you’re not sure how to make them.

2.      Light your red candle and imagine its heat washing over all of your gathered supplies

3.      Using the lipstick, draw your 2 sigils in the center of your piece of felt

4.      Sprinkle the cayenne pepper over the sigils

5.      Cut off three thorns from the rose and put them with the pepper, then one by one, drop the petals of the rose onto them as well.

6.      Draw a bee with a sharp, lethal looking stinger on your paper. Fold it up and place it on top of the rose petals

7.      Say: This bee, strong and sharp, is sustained by the nectar of this rose. This bee, strong and sharp, protects me. I am this bee, I am strong and sharp and protected

8.      Hold your hands over the little pile of things and chant: I’m a wild and an untamed thing; I’m a bee with a deadly sting

9.      Fold up the felt and twist it, then tie it closed with the rubber band OR if you’re more skilled then me, sew it shut into a pouch

10.  Hold the bundle in your hands and confidently declare: I am protected wherever I go

a.       (optionally, you can spray the bundle with rose-scented perfume at this point)

11.  Blow out your candle

12.  Carry this little charm on you until you feel the need to recharge it or make a new one