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“Most....” Zodiac squads

Most Bossy: Aries, Leo

Most Romantic: Pisces, Libra, Cancer

Most Grumpy: Aries, Cancer, 

Most Spontaneous: LEO, Aquarius, Aries

Most Sassy: Sagittarius, Capricorn, Taurus, (Gemini maybe)

Most Naughty: Aries, Scorpio, Virgo (hehehe)

Most serious: Gemini, Pisces, Capricorn

Most Bitchy: Taurus, Leo, Virgo

Most Dreamy: Aquarius, Pisces, Sagittarius

Most aggressive: A R I E S 

Most sensitive: Virgo, Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces

Most dominant: Taurus, Aries, Scorpio, Capricorn

Most scary when angry: Leo, Pisces, Capricorn

Most moody: Cancer, Libra, Gemini

Most Creative: SAGITTARIUS, Aquarius, Pisces

Most royal: Leo 

Most pervert: Taurus, Libra, Cancer

Most stronghearted: All <3

Most like to be a millionair: Capricorn, Gemini, 

Most flirtatious: Libra, Pisces

The Signs as @wolfpupy tweets

@ TheSignsAs || IG

Aries - there are few things in life that can’t be achieved with occult dark magic

Taurus - my lights aren’t all on upstairs because i am saving energy, just doing my bit to help the planet, not that you’d know anything about that

Gemini - tired of trying to figure out how to solve problems? try simply ignoring them forever instead

Cancer - im 5 weeks old and i dont care about anything

Leo - yeah i looked both ways before crossing the street, i looked both ‘handsome’ and 'radiant’, too bad i got hit by that car

Virgo - in video games you can carry x99 of an item while in real life you can mostly carry not that many

Libra - life has never gone well for me but thats all about to change now that i have an idea for a new type of hair style

Scorpio - i am going to lay completely still on the forest floor until either things start going my way or i disintegrate into nothing

Sagittarius - once again i am not included in the list of the world’s most successful people because of my complete lack of success, bias at its finest.

Capricorn - thats cool. oh that wasn’t a response to what you said i was just noting that it’s cool that i wasn’t listening or caring

Aquarius - talking was invented when humans heard howling and decided to do that but with the beautiful and interesting qualities removed

Pisces - one of these days i will float up off into space and no one can stop me, not even gravity or nasa

Spooky Horoscopes 🎃 🍁 👻

(and other bad advice)

aries: light candles. burn bridges and pumpkin scented candles with the same match. burn all the rotten residue. enjoy life without the hecklers.

taurus:  when you trick-or-treat, they will say you are too old. you have always been too old. you are old as the earth and it creaks in your bones

gemini: bitter black brew. it is the deadliest poison. drink, drink until you’re sick, until your eyes are sunken in your skull. add sugar and cream first. 

cancer: you can’t keep yourself in the same closet as your skeletons. unless you are a skeleton. if so, sort the bones. find a better place to bury them. 

leo: jump in a pile of leaves. take a moment to sink under the pile, in peace. sink, sink deeper and darker. let the ground take you. make friends there. 

virgo: what’s better than an over-sized sweater? bury yourself in knit cable sweaters. keep knitting. build yourself a cave of comfort. don’t build a way out.

libra: double-cross the monster under your bed. buy bunk beds. tuck them in at night. everything’s a monster with bags under its eyes.

scorpio: bite your tongue. drink the blood. go see a doctor. tear the stitches out and redo them yourself. what, weren’t you going to do that anyway?

sagittarius: you can’t apologize for the beast the full moon made of you. but the one you became during the crescent moon did some fucked up shit bro.

capricorn: take down your hair, take off your glasses, shed your skin, go deep into the woods, lurk in the dark. it’s time there was a monster to fear.

aquarius: cold, cold hands. blue and veined. kiss mysterious girls and average men in doorways. what happens to them after is not of your concern.

pisces:  some flowers only bloom in the winter. wreath yourself in frost, breathe mist into the air. they never told you ghosts haunt themselves first.

Signs and their secrets

*Check their Moon and/or Rising*

Aries: Can’t handle fighting and losing people. They act like they’re happy to let people go, but in reality they regret fighting and want those people back, they hate loosing people that mean something to them.

Taurus: Is afraid that no one actually wants them around, and that they’re easily forgotten about to the people who mean the most to them, is constantly wondering if they mean anything to anyone.

Gemini: They try so hard to fit in and be friends with everyone they change who they are themselves, but would rather change than be alone, because being alone is extremely scary to them.

Cancer: Tries to act happy all the time. They feel like if they let others see them upset, they’re disappointing them. Needs to make sure everyone around them doesn’t worry about them, no matter what the cost.

Leo: Believes they are unlovable and thats everything that goes wrong is their fault. They try to act tough and like they don’t care, but deep inside they are probably the most sensitive person you will ever meet.

Virgo: Has trouble handling life. They may seem like they have everything under control and in order, but in reality they have trouble making it every hour of the day. It’s hard for them to stay positive.

Libra: Can’t be without a lover because they need to invest time in others so they don’t have to focus on themselves. hates having to deal with their own problems so they hide them and pretend everything is fine.

Scorpio: Is scared of close to people. They love being trusted by others but have a hard time trusting others. Are afraid one day this will push everyone away but they don’t know how to fix it.

Sagittarius: Want only love and to be loved. When they aren’t with someone, they start to feel hopeless and like they aren’t good enough for anyone.

Capricorn: Invests themselves in trying to get to the top, so they tend to not have deep connections with anyone. They’re afraid because of this that they’ll be alone forever.

Aquarius: Doesn’t feel emotions like they think they should. They get into relationships and don’t feel anything for awhile, and because of this they believe there’s something wrong with them and hate themselves for it.

Pisces: Actually has no idea what they’re doing in life and day dreams to make themselves feel better. Is lost and confused but acts like they have everything under control and hates asking for help.

The Signs When Flirting


Super sweet and flirting lots of touching and hugging.


Taurus is a pretty good At flirting since they’re ruled by venus, they’re sweet and cute and they always make you feel wanted.


They flirt with their words.  enough said.


They are likely to toy with your emotions, and flirt with their emotions too.


Body language says it all.


With their innocence 


They alway are complimenting you it’s great.


It’s all in the eyes with them.


These guys are the sweetie pies of the century.


They are smart asses in a flirty way.


Can you say lip biter? These cuties though


Welcome to the sarcasm zone… cause thats what your in for. In a sweet way of course. 

Wintery Horoscopes ❄🌲⛄

(and other things the cold and dark may whisper)

aries: breath through your mouth. let the cold air chip and chap your lips. kiss people and tear their mouths open. discard them before they do it to you.

taurus:  buy the red mittens. wear them outside, inside, everywhere. never take them off. never leave prints. were you really there? prove it.

gemini: know it is not the cold that permeates your skin, but the dry. when you become so dry your skin is like paper, take care not to cut pieces off like your paper snowflakes, tempting as it is. you were never meant to be as them

cancer: leave misleading tracks in the snow. walk backwards. dont make snow angels. they give birth to creatures beyond your control. 

leo: the holes in your heart are not as pressing as those in your socks. pack them with dead leaves and ice. it doesn’t matter what holes you fill as long as you get one of them squared away. 

virgo: don’t forget to have some seasonal cheer with hot cocoa! drink, drink, drink your cheers and sorrows alike away. Prepare.

libra: dance like no one is watching, sing like no one is listening! sing off key, scream into the void, invite people caroling. It’s all the same after the first ten years.

scorpio: notice how the snow makes even the darkest parts of the woods peaceful. everything seems safe. remind them that you’re still around.

sagittarius: knit yourself a nice sweater. shrug it off when it becomes something else. you should know by now sometimes the existing effort is enough, even if it resembles an eldritch horror in the end.

capricorn: do not eat the red berries that thrive in the winter. to do so is death. not for you, but likely for something else.

aquarius: haha, maybe you should hibernate during the winter. no, really, do it. most fearsome beasts take part of the year off, and we need some time to rebuild.

pisces:  when i told you some flowers only bloom in the winter, that was a metaphor for snowflakes. what you’ve done is an affront to nature. stop before you reverse the natural order.

The Signs in Group Projects

Organizes all the shit but doesn’t actually do anything themselves: Leo, Aquarius, Cancer, Gemini

Isn’t there: Taurus, Scorpio, Libra

Saves everybody’s ass the night before: PISCES, Virgo, Capricorn

Does literally fuck all: Sagittarius, Aries

The Signs as Optimists/Pessimists

Aries Optimist: So much goddam energy. Literally pesters you all of the time into doing things(in a good way).
Aries Pessimist: Very open and snarky. You can legit never tell when they’re joking.

Taurus Optimist: Spoils you. They’re so nice all of the time and if you ever just need time out, they’re there.
Taurus Pessimist: So stubborn. Refuses to do things just because you asked them to.

Gemini Optimist: Very social. They’re always trying out new things and persuading you to, too.
Gemini Pessimist: Manipulative. They’ve probably got you curled around they’re finger and you don’t know.

Cancer Optimist: Like your mother (in a good way). So sweet and caring literally the best person ever.
Cancer Pessimist: So closed off. Rejects all help and refuses to tell anyone why.

Leo Optimist: they love to spread the love. If you need advice, they’re the place to go.
Leo Pessimist: just influences everyone to be negative also. Their spirit seems to carry.

Virgo Optimist: Solves all of your problems for you. Very willing and comforting to be around.
Virgo Pessimist: Telling people what they don’t want to hear. Deliberately being ignorant.

Libra Optimist: Makes you feel really special. They can brighten your mood instantly.
Libra Pessimist: Turns into a mean girl. Makes you feel like a failure and like you’ve disappointed them.

Scorpio Optimist: They’ll tell you new things. Probably be the first to ask you to do new things. SO SMILEY!!
Scorpio Pessimist: Very distant. Super closed off, listens to music all the time. Lots of staring at walls.

Sagittarius Optimist: Such an influence on you. Probably get you to do things you’d never dream of.
Sagittarius Pessimist: Insults. Very self deprecating. So much frowning and ROLLING OF THE EYES.

Capricorn Optimist: Down for anything. Literally anything. Probably drops anything to do something.
Capricorn Pessimist: Glaring. So much glaring. Laughs to themselves a lot sarcastically.

Aquarius Optimist: Makes you feel really clever. Raises you up. Makes you feel like you can do anything.
Aquarius Pessimist: That person who’s laughing and its always at you. They literally can be so judgemental.

Pisces Optimist: just generally so cute. They’re so happy and always make you as well. People act like them.
Pisces Pessimist: Satan in a person. Sarcastic little bitches. They’ll make you doubt yourself just by looking.

The signs as characteristics

Aries: impulsive yet big hearted
Taurus: controlling yet nurturing
Gemini: indecisive yet sociable
Cancer: moody yet helpful
Leo: vain yet strong
Virgo: innocent yet soft hearted
Libra: lazy yet charming
Scorpio: misunderstood yet giving
Sagittarius: detached yet outgoing
Capricorn: serious yet responsible
Aquarius: possessive yet hilarious
Pisces: emotional yet generous