hornet nests

Crustomers are always like “ohh pbbbt why cant u give me a discount for no reason, i forgot sales tax existed pbbBBbbt let me speak to ur manager this is UNFAIR” like listen…its not my fault ur a hornets nest full of human excrement only brought to life yesterday by Wingdings the Wizard. so just go get the 44 FUCKING cents out of ur brand spankin’ new mercedes-benz and pay up  


Timelapse view of hornets constructing a nest. At one point during a camping trip when I was young one of my fellow hikers stepped on one of these. It did not go well for the humans.

My dad told me a story recently about how he was in Boy Scouts or something and they went on a hike and were each given a rifle and one single bullet to practice shooting with (idk, it was the 70s or whatever). One of his friends, whom I’ll refer to as Steel Balls for reasons that will soon become clear, beckons my dad to a part of the woods and points to a giant hornets nest up in a tree. SB announces that he’s going to shoot it, waits for my dad to take cover (as one should in this situation), and fires off his only round into the nest. Sure enough, a swarm of pissed off hornets descend upon SB, who stands stoically and perfectly still at the base of the tree. Dad maintains that, despite their buzzing right around him, none of the hornets stung his friend, and they soon calmed down and returned to their newly renovated nest. SB turns back to face my dad and imparts this chunk of wisdom: “That’s the secret to dealing with hornets, Jim. They don’t know humans make rifle shots; they don’t know where the noise came from. You gotta stand still and don’t move, and they won’t chase you. If you run, they know you’re guilty.” Apparently dad was so awed he gave up his single bullet so SB could shoot the nest a second time, with the same results.

Long story short: hornets can sense guilt and there are people in the world who have tested this theory.

“Tell That Devil” Curse

A revenge spell for someone who hurt you to the point of breaking your soul and draining your light. Inspired by the song “Tell That Devil” by the Nashville Cast/Jill Andrews. This was designed with a specific person in mind, change it however you see fit.

Items needed:

  • 3 black candles
  • 1 lighter/matches
  • A pinch of pepper seeds (hot peppers preferably)
  • A piece of a fallen hornet’s nest (can usually be found on the ground in autumn)
  • 1 rusty nail
  • 1 piece of paper
  • 1 writing utensil
  • 1 small vial
  • Something to place burning paper safely
  • A spot of ground that the sunlight doesn’t touch


1. Write the victim’s name on the piece of paper. Place the seeds and hornet’s nest on the paper and fold it up as best you can. Light the three candles.

2. Begin reciting the incantation:

“You broke my soul, you poisoned my light, you blackened my heart. Now you will pay. [Victim’s name], I curse you and send you back to hell. I ask of the devil that he receive you. Feel the pain you have forced upon me tenfold. You will suffer for your evil-doings…”

3. Thrust the rusty nail into the folded paper as many times as you like, just make sure nothing falls out.

“… Feel the coffin nails pierce you…”

4. Light the folded paper on fire with the flames of the candles.

“… Feel the hellfire on your skin…”

5. Place the burning paper in the holder and wait until it is ash. Collect the ashes into the vial. Seal the vial and bury it in the spot of ground you’ve chosen that is never touched by sunlight.

“… And now I bury you in the ground, see you in hell.”

We blindfolded 15 homophobes and asked them to hit piñatas with a stick. The piñatas were actually deadly Asian giant hornet nests. What happens next will warm your heart.

Favourite Ereri fanfictions 2016


Scoring More Than Goals by LittleTinfoilDuck
Hey Lover by wasterella
Resistance by Dressed_In_Darkness
Your Warrant Need by mizzy_yolo
Cops and Feathers by toramonger
Hornet’s Nest by Monsoon
A Matter of Perspective by Kurokitty
Metamorphosis by Dressed_In_Darkness
Ma Reine by ShakespeareStoop
Overdose by Corporal_Levi_cleans_my_house
Demons and Darkness by sciencefictioness
Red Heat by sciencefictioness
Take a Bite by MyloveofChocolate
Come and Get Your Love by Gootbuttheichou
Weapon by XanderB
Foxfire Eyes by FlightlessEggsxo
The Anthropologist by The_Pirate_King
“Baby I’m howling for you.” by WishingSebastianStanwasmyman
Fire meet Gasoline by coffeesoul
The Wolf’s Bat by hidansbabe530
Sartorial Elegance by A26
Street Brat by Monsoon
To Kill With No Regrets by SinfulAvenue
Büsker Dü’s and Don’ts by shulkie


Your love is a menace by Unseeliesidh
Call My Name by himawarinee
Trust by Xenobia
A Voice From The Rubble by StarChaser93
Saving The Spade by CorporalKuudere

One shots

Come Home To Me by Corporal_Levi_cleans_my_house
Friday I’m In Love by sugarplumsenpai
Don’t Touch Me (Please, Don’t Let Go) by wordjunket
Stupid Cupid by Attack_On_Feelings

Honorable Mentions (2015)

Deal With It by Corporal_Levi_cleans_my_house
Acute Myocardial Infarction by missmichellebelle
Extra Pepperoni by hikarimutsuko
Is this really love? by kbug546
The Thug by Dressed_In_Darkness
Everything Happens For a Reason by FanaticA4Ev3r
Under The Bed by Corporal_Levi_cleans_my_house
Sweep Me Off My Feet by LaurelNymph
I Heard You Talking by screwtodayimsleeping
Beauty and The Beast by s_n_k_tt
3 AM by loveatfirstsight
A note about criticising SKAM

I’m beginning to feel a bit irritated from all the recent comments from especially international fans. Season 4 is being criticised for lacking focus, a negative representation of Islam (because Sana makes mistakes) and Isak’s speech last week is being bashed for challenging Sana’s world view.

Admitted, there has been a lot of subplots going on, and yes everything moved really slow the first couple of weeks. But it felt exactly the same way in some parts of season 3, we have just forgotten that by now. There were almost 3 weeks where we barely saw Even at all and some people thought that he wasn’t going to be reintroduced and play a part later on. And every time there was a clip which didn’t have Isak and Even in it, we complained about it.

But the many subplots and what on the surface seems like a loose focus probably just emphasises what Sana feels. And the confusion we feel also mirrors the confusion Sana feels about her life, who she is, and who she wants to be as a person.

And I love the fact that Julie Andem isn’t afraid of letting the Muslim be the one who makes the biggest mistake of them all. The Instagram account. When the season began a lot of people also voiced their concern about how Julie Andem shouldn’t let Sana become a lecturing saint. She hasn’t done that and now that is being criticised too. It’s incredibly difficult to be Julie Andem.

Yes, Sana is a Muslim but she is also a teenage girl with lots of feelings and a lot of emotional baggage from the time before Nissen which she has chosen to hide from the other girls for 2 years. The girls have never seen beyond the hijab nor her façade and neither have we, the viewers. We have seen a tough girl, who always have had the answer and we have rooted for her exactly because she is badass. But Isak is right when he says she is a bossy bitch who often has been quite coarse. We just haven’t acknowledged because we thought it was so nice to see a Muslim girl who didn’t have the stereotypical oppressed girl role.

As with the other seasons, there are viewers who are being schooled on the main topic. This time Islam. Let’s be happy about that. And in this season the Muslim girl just happens to have a lot of issues and might be a little bit less cool than we initially thought.

And now she has fucked up big time! We now know about how she was bullied before high school, but the girls on Nissen don’t know anything about that yet!
And when Julie Andem chooses to stir up a hornets’ nest and let Sana fail and make mistakes, then she emphasises the fact that Sana is a teenager – a human being – on par with the other characters as well as us, the viewers. She is neither more or less from being a Muslim, the fact that she is a Muslim has quite so nothing to do with her mistakes.

Like with the previous main characters, Sana has to learn that people need people. She has to learn that islands need bridges. She has to learn to use words to communicate with, and that you get far by being kind. And she is already on her way.

And remember the enormous cultural gaps within the Skam fandom. Skam is incredibly Scandinavian in all of its aspects. Scandinavian sexual morality is for example very different from how you would portray things in the US. Same goes with discussions about racism. It has become a fact that Skam now is being watched all over the world. Skam is not politically correct. Skam was not made to please all nationalities, sexualities, religions etc. It was made for 16 years old Norwegian girls. The rest of us are just fellow viewers. When watching with unofficial subtitles things can get further lost in translation. Everything that is being addressed in Skam is not directly translatable to contexts from outside the Scandinavian countries. Or the themes are, but how they are being addressed and portrayed is very Scandinavian, please just remember that.

Okay so first a disclaimer in that I’m not a grumpy 40-something fed up with “those damn kids”, I’m 22, and so very much one of “those damn kids”.

Anyways, whenever I see a post by a millennial complaining “we’re fucked up because of our parents/society/leaders!” all I see is more evidence of this generation’s nasty habit of shunting the blame to *anything* but themselves, and avoiding having to properly confront an issue, since its always “society’s fault” or “my parents fault!”

Newsflash: Even if you do have crappy parents/school teachers/community leaders, and while that *can* have an effect on you psychologically, do you really know who is ultimately responsible for the actions and events you engage in?


Nobody else.

So get your own shit together, and take some fucking responsibility for your actions and life, instead of always blaming someone else for whenever a thing goes wrong. Because newsflash, your parents did the same bullshit when they were your age, and their parents before them.

But most of the time, your parents grew out of it, either of their own free will, or because reality gave them a slap in the face.

Now do the same and act like a fucking adult, and not a spoiled millennial brat who cries about “oppression” while sitting in a Starbucks, drinking $5 coffee, and wearing a “This is What a Feminist Looks Like” shirt that probably cost $50.

Grow the fuck up.


Tell us about the rescue attempts

Tell us about the rescue attempts, about the friends who noticed that one of their group was suddenly Not There. Tell us about the friends who stockpiled favors because the RAs were too busy and the end of the years wouldn’t come soon enough. Tell us about the friends,or lovers, or the all-but-kin, who dove into the maze trailing string because they couldn’t be without them. Tell us about those who kicked the hornets’ nest, but had a big enough bargaining chip that they were able to get out of it, for the most part. Tell us about the ones who went in, guns blazing, because they needed their friends back. Tell us about the best of friends, the strongest of bonds. Tell us about those who were desperate enough to storm the gates of the Kingdom itself, armed with iron, salt and favors.


Even when we post about the “No True Scotsman” fallacy saying we can’t simply cut out everyone we disagree with and say they aren’t Asatru the crazies still come out of the woodwork.

Appropriating ancient gods AND a punk rock movement to justify your bullshit insecurities? And THAT is the best insult you could come up with?? 

Go back to your echo chamber and sniffle about your white pride some more.

I feel like roommates make fun of Derek for the things we have come to love as canon. (3/?)

Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines

Y/N: Hey, Derek, I need help with my Spanish homework. Think you can get ole’ Miguel to come help me?

Derek: *gif*

Isaac: Why the hell would she do that?

Peter: Who cares? She riled up the hornets’ nest, and now we all will have to pay. He’s wearing his “oh you think you’re funny well I’m not amused” face.

Isaac: That’s what it is! I’ve been trying to name that face for months now, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

Peter: Yes, it’s very similar to his “I’m being sarcastic face”, the giveaway is in the eyebrows.

Y/N: Really? I always thought it was more in the nostril flare. The whole “big bad Alpha” thing.

Derek: I am literally right here, you guys.

Originally posted by comeforfriends

Y/N: All I did was get hamburger instead of pepperoni!

Derek: *gif* We don’t like you.

Y/N: You speaking for your backup dancers, now?

Isaac: Yes, we took a vote, and he speaks for all of us.

Peter: *arms crossed, grumbling* No one speaks for me but me! …..But yes. Yes, he speaks for me on this.

Y/N: You are all insane!

Originally posted by realteenwolf

Y/N: And another thing-

Derek: *gif*

Y/N: *pauses* *gif*

Derek: *gif* What the hell is wrong, Y/N?

Isaac: *gif*

Peter: *walking by, not included in the conversation* *gif*

Derek: *gif* *realizes what he’s doing* *gif* Oh, you can all go to hell!

Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines

Y/N: Gah! Oh my God! How long have you been following me?

Derek: *gif* All day.

Y/N: Of course. Creepiest yet most innocent answer ever. Why did I expect anything less?

Derek: How is that creepy? I’m just trying to keep you safe!

Isaac: I’m with her all day at school, dude. It’s called shifts. We need to schedule them.

Peter: *arms crossed as he stands behind Derek* And you had me with you the whole time, I don’t see why I had to follow you around like I’m a little duckling or something.

Derek: That’s just because I don’t trust you.

Peter: *looks offended, holds hand to chest* Moi?

Y/N: Peter, stop being dramatic.

Peter: *sighs* Fine.

Isaac: Yeah, you’re getting a little Derek-y.

Peter: Well there’s no need to be rude.

Originally posted by camilafrade

Y/N: So, if we attack here *points at map* we should be good, but-

Derek: *gif*

Y/N: *rolls eyes and huffs* What, Derek?

Derek: I didn’t say anything!

Y/N: Your eyebrows have their own tone.

Peter: It’s quite annoying, really.

Derek: Well then, how about I just stare at you like this for the next hour then? *gif*

Peter: Try me.

Derek: *gif intensifies*

Isaac: *after a beat* Wanna go grab some pizza, Y/N?

Y/N: May as well. It’s already started. There’s no breaking a Hale stare off once they’ve begun.

Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines

Y/N: Derek, it’ll be okay, we’ll get ‘em next time.

Derek: *gif*

Isaac: Or we can go get them now.

Peter: Yeah, don’t give them a chance at “next time”.

Y/N: We’ll give ‘em hell.

Derek: *smiles but tries to hide it by turning away*

Originally posted by teenwolf--imagines

Y/N: I swear to God, the mood lighting has to stop!

Isaac: I agree, there is a line, Derek.

Peter: A line? There is a gigantic wall and he just freaking climbed over it like it was nothing and continued his epic lighting ways on the other side.

Derek: *gif* I have no idea what you guys are talking about.

Y/N, Isaac, Peter: *unanimous groan*

Imagine Jared Leto is Your Best Friend’s Dad - Chapter 10

Chapter 10 - Spell

This chapter was inspired by the song “I Put a Spell On You” by Annie Lennox. I highly suggest you listen as you read. Enjoy!

We turned in part one of our project and now we had the weekend to finish it. Allegra thought it’d be best to wait until then, so we could really focus. Not sure how much focusing I can handle, memories of Mr. Leto from Monday night were still swarming in my mind like hornets in a nest. Nevertheless, she’s decided to spend the night at my house this time because her dad has to go on his routine real estate convention once every other month. Like that’s what I need, a break from Mr. Leto.

Saturday couldn’t come any sooner. The week absolutely dragged. It felt like an eternity since I’d seen Mr. Leto, not to mention, it’s getting harder to look Allegra in the eye at times.

But this Saturday was particularly special; it was our Fall Festival. Every year, our neighborhood throws this big bash in the evening to celebrate fall with a parade, hayrides, magic acts, singers, candy apples, you name it! My mom, my brother, Allegra and I plan to go once her dad drops her off.

I looked at my outfit in the mirror; I had on a cream-colored mid-drift, some earth green slouch pants and a green checkered-pattern shirt.

*Ding Dong*

“Coming!” I yelled. I put my last finishing touches on my messy bun and skipped to the door.

Mr. Leto greeted me holding Allegra’s overnight bag. Forget my outfit, he emulated rugged hot: his faded blue jeans hung from his waste with a fitted white t-shirt was snug around his abs and an open an unbuttoned plaid shirt hung from shoulders, interlaced with brown, red and tan stripes. He looked at me through obscure aviator shades.

“Hey, Kerri. Wow, look at you…” he said huskily as he gave me the elevator eyes, taking me in. The grit in his voice roused my senses.

“What was that dad?” Allegra asked as she ran up to the house as she swung her book bag over her shoulder.

“I was just saying that I didn’t know a rock star lived here!” his voice boomed as he recovered quickly and stepped into the house. The whiff of his cologne tickled my nose as he passed me. He was absolutely intoxicating.

“Yeah, Kerri, you look so hot. Any special reason?” curiosity rang in her voice. I knew she was alluding to Derek. I tried my best not to make eye contact with Mr. Leto.

“It’s the fall festival. I gotta look good!” I paced my hand behind my head and fashioned a pose.

We burst into laughter instantly.

My mom came around the waved Mr. Leto in the kitchen. Their conversation became murmurs as I got Allegra’s bags settled in the living room.

“You know, I was thinking, Raquel…” Mr. Leto began as he entered the living room. “I’ll take the girls and Nico to the festival. Take them off your hands a bit. Before this convention I could clear my mind a bit with some…festivities” He spoke that last word with a resounding firmness before shooting a seductive glance in my direction. His too familiar smile slowly crept on his face.

I could feel my body temperature rise at the speed of light. My face felt flushed. I quickly turned my attention to Allegra’s bags to try and distract myself.

“Oh… well, sure, Jared. Thanks!” She finished tucking in Nico’s shirt and kissed him on the forehead. “And Kerri, I’ll bake start on the first couple batches of cookies you made while you’re out. You all have fun!” She hugged me and vanished into her favorite room of the house, the kitchen.

There were people gathered all throughout the street. The festival stretched five blocks down, but everyone was gathered at the main attraction was the parade.

“Hey Nico, look! It’s Spongebob.” Allegra went ahead of us to get a better view for Nico. I trailed behind them with Mr. Leto behind me.

There was a tug at my shirt. I shrugged it off it because there were so many people crowding around, it was hard for all of our bodies and bags not to graze each other every now and then.

I felt it again and looked to see it was Mr. Leto’s hand sliding against my opened buttoned up shirt. My head made a sudden turn in his direction but that didn’t stop him. His hand found my right side and stoke it gently. His hands were so soft and cool against my bare skin. I looked around, worried someone would see, but everyone’s eyes were fixated on the show before them.

Keep reading

not to poke the hornet’s nest again but I finally found better words to describe what pisses me off about the design of female characters in smite and why “it’s lore-accurate” or “i know people irl who look like that” isn’t a legitimate defence.

First of all, take Aphrodite for an example. Aphrodite is a character who is deeply associated with and representative of sex and love, and was often represented scantily clad or completely nude in Greek and Roman art (though obviously she would have been called Venus in Rome). If you’re just looking at it on a surface level, or if you’re a fucking idiot like that game theory dude, you can be like “well she’s naked normally so her design in Smite is obviously fine since it’s accurate” but that’s wrong.

Nudity in ancient Greek art is not inherently sexualized, and when it is meant to be sexual it’s done so BECAUSE IT’S THE GODDESS OF SEX AND LOVE. The design of Aphrodite in Smite is literally straight up commercial sexualization. It’s why she and Neith are in all the browser ads you’d see for the game all over the place. The same goes for virtually every girl in Smite apart from a few notable exceptions like Bellona (who still has the “titty plate” trope in her armour design) and Amaterasu.

Lore doesn’t factor into the design of most of the female characters in Smite. They look like they do because Hi-Rez’s goal is to make what their demographic finds to be appealing, sexually, and capitalize off of it. As long as the characters’ glorified lingerie LOOKS Greek, looks Chinese, looks Egyptian, etc etc, they’ll consider that a job well done and finish the visual design portion of the character.

It DOESN’T MATTER whether the character is meant to be a seductress like Da Ji, or a goddess of war and death like the Morrigan, or a personification of the Night itself. The reason Hi-Rez sexualizes all of its characters is not remotely to do with lore, it’s to capitalize off of horny 15-year-olds.

If you’re defending these goddesses’ designs you’re just buying into it, plain and simple