horn five

We played a game last night where we sorted Doctor Who clips onto what I like to call “The Castellan-Soldeed Scale of Melodrama.” The lowest mark on the scale represents the egregious under-acting of “What? No, not the Mind Probe!” while the highest mark is the ham-fisted melodrama of “mY DREeeEEeems of CON-quest!” Why did such cheesy acting exist in early Who? Well, film was expensive and budgets were small. Redoing a scene was prohibitively expensive and as a result these serials went out in a charmingly unrefined state. Results as follows:

0- The Castellan: “No, not the Mind Probe!” from The Five Doctors

1- Guy who is shot by Zaroff: [Does not react when a gun in pulled on him] [Makes no movement when shot and dies noiselessly] from The Underwater Menace

2- Crowd, upon hearing the announcement of a new age of prosperity: [a few lukewarm hurrays] from The Pirate Planet.

2.25- Fedorin: [Drinks poisoned wine, chokes, apparently attempts to wash it down with another sip of poison] [Falls over] from Enemy of the World

2.5- Guy from crowd who actually raises his arm in celebration. Props to you. From The Pirate Planet.

3- Group award to everyone in The Ambassadors of Death shootout who displayed Python-esque levels of under-acting.

4.3- The Doctor, holding the Master at swordpoint while dramatically eating the Master’s sandwich. From The Sea Devils.

5- True neutral, appropriate acting for the situation at hand. I nominate Solon’s surprisingly even-handed acting in The Brain of Morbius.

5.5- The Seventh Doctor’s famous “UNLIMITED RICE PUDDING” monologue mocking Davros in Remembrance of the Daleks.

6- The Sixth Doctor’s ‘evil mastermind’ monologue at the very beginning of The One Doctor.

6.75- Zaroff: NOTHING IN THE WORLD CAN STOP ME NOW! From The Underwater Menace.

7- the very end of The Dominators, where Two attempts to stop their companions from falling over in an earthquake and just kind of. Let’s Zoe fall into the gravel while they cling onto Jamie

7.5 The melodramatic fighters in the Ambassadors of Death shootout, notable mention to Action Hero Brigadier.

8- “Ramon Salamander” (really the Second Doctor in disguise) cowering away and falling onto the floor because​ they’re afraid Victoria might hit them

3.5-8: Croagnon in the body of the Chief Caretaker. Was nominated to both under-acting and over-acting and I can’t argue with either. Apparently the creative staff told the actor to tone it down and he wouldn’t listen. From Paradise Towers.

9: the end scenes of The Dominators, particularly Rago yelling “OBEY!!!” Made funnier by the fact that The Dominators is possibly one of the dullest serials in Who history.

9: The famous “No one in the colony believes in Macra! There is no such thing as Macra!” monologue from the mostly missing serial The Macra. If you haven’t heard it, please look it up. We were howling with laughter as we were watching this.

10: The one and only “My DReeeeAAAAMS of CON-quest! scene from The Horns of Nimon.

Dirty, Pretty Things Part Three

Hey guys! I hope that everyone had a fantastic week! I’ve been crazy busy with school, but I have a little downtime now, so I’m planning to write way more this week! Anyways, this is another installment of the Dirty, Pretty Things series! (There’s definitely going to be more to come!) I hope everyone likes it!

Dirty, Pretty Things

Tom couldn’t bare to look at her while he sped home from the library. Her silky hair was mussed up, her lips swollen from his touch, and her thighs shook from the effect of the time he’d spent in between them. Tom smelt of her perfume and she of his cologne. He wanted her so fucking badly that he felt like he was going to combust.

    She, on the other hand, was rolled onto her side in the passenger seat with her gaze firmly planted on Tom as he pushed past the speed limit in a rush to get them back home. She thought of warning him that he may get a ticket for erratic driving, but theorized against it.

    As her eyelids blearily fluttered against the skin of her cheeks, she thought about everything she and Tom had just done.

Her mind wandered to the soft brush of Tom’s curls in between her legs at the library, and then again in the car while he pinned her hips down and in place. When he finally allowed her to cum, he’d shoved a rough hand over her mouth so nobody would hear her gasping his name, and licked the mess away.

    When she looked at Tom now, his lips were still glossy, and  his hands gripped the steering wheel so tight, that his knuckles were white. He’d used his horn about five times and had proceed to tailgate the car in front of them so badly, that they’d slowed down to allow him to pass, and flipped him off while shouting curses.

    She knew that he was turned on, but she was surprised by the intensity of it. She perked up with an idea. Tom loved, loved, loved to tease her when she couldn’t do anything about it, most notably while she was trying to study or when she was on the phone with a family member.

    Her words would slur together as he pressed his fingers into her and she’d shake. Once she even dropped her phone, as he brought her closer and closer to orgasm. If Tom really felt like fucking with her, he would yank her panties down and start to lecherously lick her out until she hung up on however she was speaking with to cum.

Biting her lip, she reached to the floor to pick up the book they’d been taking turns reading back and forth to one another. “The very suggestion of your words, she said-”

“No, no, no.” Tom said, “Darling, please don’t. I can’t focus on driving if you start this right now.”

“Bind my wrists tighter than any rope.” She slipped the seatbelt off her chest and reached across to Tom’s side of the car. Settling a soft touch onto his thigh, she licked her lips and flicked to the next page.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Tom uttered, taking a quick sideways glance at her wrists.

If they were in bed right now, he would have her pressed into the mattress, completely breathless and blithe. One of his hands would be pinning her wrists to the bed, the other would be wrapped in her hair, pulling her into him once more. Tom thought about how good she would feel around him. He thought about the sounds she’d be making and he had to bite down on his lower lip to contain his groan.

“Normally I tend to choose my words carefully when it comes to such delicate matters. However, seeing you now, standing here in the moonlight, all I can think about is pulling your panties down and fucking you with your socks on.” She’d lost all sense of her shyness. She could tell Tom wanted her. His chest was bubbling with shallow breaths and his gaze kept flickering from her, and back to the road.

“Darling, if you don’t watch your mouth, you’re going to be in trouble when we get home.” Tom forced his eyes to stay focused on the street.

She batted her eyes at him and slipped her hand further up his leg to palm the aching tent in his jeans. “Are you gonna spank me?”

“Fucking hell, I’m going to crash the car if you don’t stop runnin your mouth right now.” Tom slammed his hand against the horn when the car in front of them took too long to make it’s turn.

Despite how saccharinely dulcet she looked, Tom knew that she wasn’t when they were in bed. She loved riling Tom up to the point where he’d drag her over his knee and spank her until her bottom was the exact same shade as the ring of lipstick she’d left around his cock.

Unbuttoning his jeans, she continued. “I’m the kind of girl who has a restless mind and impatient legs… I watched as her fingers nervously flicked the well worn elastic of her white cotton panties. I want you to ruin me.”

“You better fucking believe I’m going to ruin you as soon as we park this car.” Tom had a hard time thinking that he’d be able to walk up the stairs to their apartment while keeping his hands to himself.

They were almost there. They were getting so close to home. They’d be there within the minute, Tom’s mind raced. As soon as he stopped the car, Tom was prepared to fucking drown in her.

“I want to keep you on edge, torture you with pleasure, she purred, until you beg me to push you over the fucking cliff.” She leaned over the console to press her mouth to his neck. Her hands danced above the waistband of his boxers, slowly dipping in and out. Touching him softly, but not enough.

Her hands were so warm, Tom thought, but not as warm as her mouth. He jerked into her when she bit his neck, giggling slightly.

Spotting their building, she removed her touch from him completely and sat back in her  seat. She had worked him into a frenzy, just as he had done to her in the library, and now she was going to make him wait for it, just until they got upstairs.


Places of Note On/Around Campus

The Borders

The campus is enclosed by a river, a highway, and train tracks.

The river is called the Argent, at least by students and locals. It’s not terribly wide - four or five meters - but its very, very deep. The speed doesn’t appear to be constant, possibly a result of magical fallout from places where time flows strangely. Sometimes it floods in spring.

The highway is as mundane as highways can get. Two lanes, flat as paper, slightly worn. Don’t pick up hitchhikers anywhere near the college. Always put something in the passenger seat if you’re in the car alone.

The train tracks are abandoned. You think. Sometimes you hear trains at night. Sometimes you hear the scream of steel. Sometimes there’s the light blazing out of the fog, visible through the trees and making the shadows move. But the train tracks are abandoned. The train tracks are abandoned. The train tracks are abandoned. You do not ask why.

Outside the Borders

The town. You don’t know the name. It might be Fairfield? Something-ville? Or maybe….? In any case, it’s small. There’s a total of five named streets. Maybe that’s why you can’t ever quite remember the name. It’s entirely generic. The townies are quiet but agreeable enough. They don’t have much patience for damn students and the noise they make up there on the hill.

The only thing of note in town is the quintessential student cafe, Kenning’s. Packed with big armchairs and serving strong coffee till late at night, it’s one of the safest places to discuss the forbidden major, as it sits beyond the reach of the Gentry. It’s run by one Mrs. Margaret Kenning, who’s reportedly the seventh such Kenning to own the cafe, and certainly has the disaffected demeanor of someone with six inherited generations of customer service. There are poetry slams on Thursdays.

Within the borders - Non-EU buildings

The EU buildings cluster largely in the center of the several square miles of school land. Around the edges are:

The Walmart. It squats right by the highway turnoff onto Elsewhere land. It doesn’t look big, for a Walmart, but inside it is virtually endless. They employ a lot of students. You have probably found yourself working there two or three times over the years, although you can’t remember applying, or arriving at all, for that matter. No one lasts longer than three days. This is not because of any particular danger. Rather, you quit because roughly half the cash you accept turns to dead leaves in the morning, and it’s taken out of your pay every time. On particularly busy nights you end up owing the Walmart money. In every sense of the phrase, you aren’t being paid enough for this. But at least it’s safe to visit as a customer.

(More often than not the person on the next register has horns/five arms/hands that are more or less just suction cups, and they seem as confused about wearing the official uniform as you are. The Walmart is a liminal space for all entities on campus, without discrimination. This is also the only known situation in which one of the Gentry can be seen using a computer without something awful happening, but then the computers seem weirdly…organic? So who knows what’s up with that.)

The Denny’s: It’s in the same Walmart parking lot. It’s a perfectly normal Denny’s by night, and it’s possible to get a perfectly average job there provided you only work the night shift. When the sun rises it turns transparent and then vanishes entirely with everyone inside, leaving only ruined foundations. It reappears at sunset, fully formed and empty. Do not be inside when the sun rises.

A particularly beloved EU tradition is to gather on the Denny’s curb twenty minutes before sunrise the morning following a school dance, and throw things at the building until it’s gone entirely. It’s generally agreed that seeing what happens to a syrup cup as it passes through a wall that isn’t entirely there is A. highly entertaining B. literally indescribable and C. a hell of a warning. The Denny’s parking lot segment is true neutral ground, ideal for deals and duels.

The Forest. The heavily forested area in the south, which borders the highway and a good portion of the river, is sometimes called Morganwode. That’s the name that shows up on old maps, at least - the ones that date back to when the University itself had a real name. These days it’s more commonly just called the Forest. It looks very small on Google Earth, which shows a small clearing in the center of a sparse group of trees. In the center, you can see the round roof of something that might be a gazebo. No one has ever found this clearing. On foot, the forest appears dense, enormous, and virtually lightless. Optimistic outdoorsfolk have set up an intricate system of color-coded hiking trails over the years, which are generally safe provided you don’t stray at all. Sometimes people say that the deeper you go, the older the forest gets, until you’re walking in true wild forest, ancient and untouched and uncaring, thousands of years old - creaking oaks and cedar and birch, taller than you can see, wider than you thought possible… But the trails do not go that deep, and so you don’t know if this is true.

The Wishing Well: it sits on the edge of the woods, and cannot be reasoned with.

The Swamp: a boggy area in the east, the area that’s usually flooded by the river in the spring. Home of the swamp hag.

When You Criticize The Instruments
  • flutes: *nod stoically and then go alternately cry from embarrassment and plot revenge the the bathroom*
  • clarinets: it's my reed
  • saxes: *don't realize the director is talking to them; continue conversation about nothing to do with band*
  • trumpets: yoU WANNA GO BITCH IM THE BEST
  • horns: i play like five measures in this whole piece the fuck do you want from me
  • trombones: haha I know man *fistbump each other*
  • tubas: excuse you we are the foundation of this band so we are never wrong
  • percussionists: *mutter mutiny under their breath and don't fix it because they weren't doing it wrong in the first place*

anonymous asked:

CAMPUS GROUNDS WALMART

YOU KNOW IT

I’m actually literally in the middle of that ~canon campus page and here’s what i’ve got about the walmart so far -

There is a Walmart right by the highway turnoff onto Elsewhere land. It doesn’t look big, for a Walmart. Inside it is virtually endless. They employ a lot of students. You have probably found yourself working there two or three times over the years, although you can’t remember applying, or arriving at all, for that matter. No one lasts longer than three days. This is not because of any particular danger. Rather, you quit because roughly half the cash you accept turns to dead leaves in the morning, and it’s taken out of your pay every time. On particularly busy nights you end up owing the Walmart money. In every sense of the phrase, you aren’t being paid enough for this. But at least it’s safe to visit as a customer.

(More often than not the person on the next register has horns/five arms/hands that are more or less just suction cups, and they seem as confused about wearing the official uniform as you are. The Walmart is a liminal space for all entities on campus, without discrimination. This is also the only known situation in which one of the Gentry can be seen using a computer without something awful happening, but then the computers seem weirdly…organic? So who knows what’s up with that.)

anonymous asked:

lala is a terrible movie and you have terrible taste. it is so stereotypical and boring and i am honestly shocked someone who claims to know about film isnt insulted by it

[First Girl:]
Ba-ba-da-ba da-ba-da-ba
Ba-ba-ba ba-da-ba-da-ba
Ba-ba-ba ba

[First Girl:]
I think about that day
I left him at a Greyhound station
West of Santa Fe

We were seventeen, but he was sweet and it was true
Still I did what I had to do
‘Cause I just knew

Summer Sunday nights
We’d sink into our seats
Right as they dimmed out all the lights
A Technicolor world made out of music and machine
It called me to be on that screen
And live inside each scene

[First Girl & First Man:]
Without a nickel to my name
Hopped a bus, here I came
Could be brave or just insane

[First Girl, First Man & Second Man:]
We’ll have to see

[First Girl:]
‘Cause maybe in that sleepy town
He’ll sit one day, the lights are down
He’ll see my face and think of how he…

[First Girl, First Man, Second Man & Dancers:]
…used to know me

[All:]
Climb these hills
I’m reaching for the heights
And chasing all the lights that shine
And when they let you down
You’ll get up off the ground
'Cause morning rolls around
And it’s another day of sun

[Young Man:]
I hear 'em every day
The rhythms in the canyons
That’ll never fade away
The ballads in the barrooms
Left by those who came before
They say “you gotta want it more”
So I bang on every door

[Second Girl:]
And even when the answer’s “no”
Or when my money’s running low
The dusty mic and neon glow
Are all I need

[Young Man:]
And someday as I sing my song
A small-town kid’ll come along

[Second Girl & Young Man:]
That’ll be the thing to push him on and go go

[All:]
Climb these hills
I’m reaching for the heights
And chasing all the lights that shine
And when they let you down
You’ll get up off the ground
'Cause morning rolls around
And it’s another day of sun

[Instrumental Break]

[First Girl:]
And when they let you down
The morning rolls around

[All:]
It’s another day of sun
It’s another day of sun
It’s another day of sun
It’s another day of sun
Just another day of sun
It’s another day of sun
Another day has just begun
It’s another day of sun

[Five car horn honks]

It’s another day of sun!

A quick check-in on space cowboys Lance and Keith, the Two McClains

Lance ducks beneath a barrage of gunfire, and Keith jumps the fence into the corral, ready to defend him from the swiftly approaching goons that Hesfer employs. The animals in the corral are not best pleased by the fighting, making low, threatening hums that Keith would probably call “moos” if they were Earth cows.

Lance definitely calls them the cows with far too much delight, and Keith, dreading the horrific jokes, has consistently cut him off by stating, “They’re called munssen, Lance. No one here knows what a cow is other than me.”

Keith stabs towards a thug who’s trying to get at Lance, and he parries a blow from another as Lance attempts to take the boss down with his pistols. Hesfer fires at the giant munssen that Lance is using for cover, and said peaceful grazing herbivore decides that it has had enough of this crap and proceeds to lower its head and charge at the mercenary boss, skewering her on three of its five horns.

The battle ends abruptly.

Lance and Keith and Hesfer’s thugs all look at each other. The alien woman who had been Hesfer’s righthand takes a moment to evaluate the bloody, unmoving body of her employer and says, “Well, McClains, I think we’ve had enough for today.”

“Right,” Lance says, sounding strangled, tipping his cowboy hat at her. “But considering the hole in my favourite jacket, maybe it’s a moot point.”

Keith groans and buries his face in hands that are still clutching his twin blades.

Lance just grins wildly, high on adrenaline. And stupidity. But the latter was his default state. “C’mon, we just about wrangled ourselves a win here.” He twirls his pistols back into their holsters and shoots Keith with finger guns.

“No. Stop,” Keith says, pointing at him with one of his swords. “Lance, I’m dead serious.”

“Oh Keith, that’s just bull,” Lance crows.

Keith can feel himself dying inside. “You can’t even pun properly half the time, let alone make good ones when you do,” he insists, trying to end his suffering while sheathing his blades.

“Right, we’ll be taking our boss’s body now,” the woman says, looking like she sincerely doubts their sanity and wishes to be far away. Keith does not blame her. He ignores the retreating mercenaries as Lance holds a hand to his heart.

“Yeah, she was such a prize that heifer, I mean Hesfer.”

“Lance, if you don’t stop, you are sleeping on the damn floor, see if I won’t kick your ass straight out of bed tonight.”

“Sorry, buddy, I don’t think I herd you right?” And then he runs away, weaving between the munssen (all right, damn it, they definitely looked like cows, albeit green with five horns), as Keith gives chase.

Keith tackles him into the dust, to the background chorus of more space cows mooing and going about their business.

Lance grins up at him, shameless. “Howdy are you today, McClain?”

Keith drops his head to Lance’s chest, breathing heavily, and says, “Even though I’ve been stuck with you for months, half the time I still don’t know what in starnation you’re on about.”

The silence that follows is charged. When Keith lifts his head up, he sees that Lance’s blue eyes are wider — and darker. 

“Keith, did you just break out your Texas for me? Did you just make a space cowboy pun for me?”

“No. You’re hearing things, maybe being a cowboy has limited your range.” Apparently, Keith could not pun properly either, nor did he have any dignity left, thanks to Lance.

“Keith. Keith,” Lance says, breathless and writhing beneath him, and Keith would be answering that call to nudity if they weren’t currently in a corral full of space cows, and if Lance wasn’t about to say the exact thing he said next.

“We should probably catch a ride home, right?” Lance asks, teasing Keith with a swift roll of his hips. “Or …” And then he leans up and whispers in his ear. “Say it, Keith, c’mon. Please? Pretty please?”

“No. Also, the fact that bad jokes turn you on explains so much.”

“Keith, we should save the horse, and —”

Keith covers Lance’s mouth with his hand. “You’ve said it once, and that was more times than it should ever have been said. Now, let’s get the hell out of here before we get stampeded over.”

Lance sighs heavily, allowing Keith to pull him up to a standing position. Just as they’ve left the corral, walking over to the ikuril they rode in on, Lance pounces onto Keith’s back. Keith is forced to tightly grip the lanky legs that have wrapped around his waist, stumbling to keep his balance and prevent them both from crashing to the ground. 

With all joy and ridiculousness, Lance announces, “Okay, Keith, I won’t say it since you’re the hoss.”

See, @thidwicktails see what you made me do? ;D (For everyone else’s reference, that “starnation” pun was brought to my attention in this post. I am not nearly that clever. I might have googled a bit to get ideas for the other ones. I cannot pun naturally!)

This is a little too cheerful to fit in my mercenary space cowboy world. But even so, let’s pretend it takes place a few months after they’ve established themselves as The Two McClains. *nods*

Edit: Edited and posted this one-shot over on AO3 under the title Save a Horse (But Also Spare the Cowboy), just ‘cause I wanted to keep most of my writings in one spot :)

The Dragon Lore of Lady Trent

To close out the month I decided to make a post documenting the lore surrounding the dragons in this series, going book by book. I will be cataloguing both the biology of the dragons as well as how they fit into the cultures of humans.

Note: I am treating every illustration in these books as canonically accurate to the dragons they represent. This will be used to add to the information found within the text.

A NATURAL HISTORY OF DRAGONS

BIOLOGY

Overview

  • Dragons seem to be classified in two different ways. There are True Dragons, which are accepted as dragons by everyone, and there are Lesser Dragonkind, creatures either related to dragons or which resemble them enough to make one think of a dragon.
  • Dragons seem to be reptilian creatures in appearance, possessing scales. How exactly they are classified isn’t stated.
  • At least three species of True Dragons are capable of having runt individuals, that is, individuals who mature partially to adulthood, gaining adult characteristics such as their crest or ruff but remaining small in size. Whether this applies to all species of True Dragons and Lesser Dragonkind is unknown.
  • All True Dragons breathe something in addition to their breath.
  • Wings are not like those of a bat; judging by the cover art and what it said inside the text, dragon wings have fingers positioned on the wing bone.
  • True Dragon bones decay after decay rapidly.
  • Dragon bones seem hollow and oddly light.

Lesser Dragonkind

Sparklings

  • Originally thought to be insects
  • According to illustration, they posses six legs
  • Multiple species and colors
  • Spit out sparks, hence the name
  • Can be preserved in vinegar
  • Fall to ash when they die, unless preserved

Wolf-Drake

  • Vestigial wings
  • Brown in color, crimson eyes
  • Prefers female prey

Wyverns

  • Exist

True Dragons

Akhian Desert Drake

  • Gold in color

Moulish Swamp-Wyrm

  • Muddy green in color
  • Extraordinary Breath: Noxious Fumes

Vyrstrani Rock-Wyrm

  • Grey in color; albinos do exist
  • Extraordinary Breath: Ice Crystals
  • Does not become male or female until maturity, Runt is a neuter
  • Carry their dead to a cave; Dragon’s Graveyard
  • Sulfuric Acid can preserve the bones
  • Wing is full of holes covered by scales; holes open on the upstroke and the scales close them on the down stroke (found in other species as well)
  • Measurements: Roughly 5m in length

CULTURE

Draconean

  • Worshiped Dragon-headed Gods
  • Firestone was important, found in many of their temples
  • Zhagrit Mat: Draconean King who was transformed into a dragon monster according to legend.

Other

  • Preserved dragon bone could be used to build
  • Balaur is the Vystrani word for dragon.
  • Locals see dragons as pest; eat livestock
  • Dragons can be kept in Menageries
  • A Natural History of Dragons by Sir Richard Edgeworth is an important texts

THE TROPIC OF SERPENTS

BIOLOGY

Overview

  • The method for preserving dragon bone works on Savannah Snakes, but needs to be modified slightly.
  • Preserved dragon bones can be used to create a sturdy and light glider.
  • Dragon flesh is foul, including the flesh of the Swamp Wyrm.

Lesser Dragonkind

Sea-snake

  • Large

Drakefly

  • Four wings, two legs
  • Feathered, almost birdlike
  • Dragon jaws
  • Bifurcated tail
  • Eats insects and eggs

Wyvern

  • Still exists

True Dragons

Six Characteristics

  1. Quadrupedalism
  2. Wings capable of flight
  3. A ruff or fan behind the skull
  4. Bones frangible post-mortem
  5. Egg laying
  6. Extraordinary breath

Moulish Swamp-Wyrm

  • Semi Aquatic
  • Crocodilian-like hide
  • Cannot fly, only short gliding actions
  • Juvenile Form: Fangfish
  • Queens live in the lake, males live in the swamp
  • Queens are much larger, at least ten meters in length
  • Egg conditions determine which are male and which are female
  • Lay many small eggs, about ten centimeters in diameter
  • Hunt by lunging out of the water, using their wings to help them glide up to their prey
  • Also hunt like crocodiles
  • Hunt by waiting under their prey until their noxious breath causes them to fall from the tree
  • Like other dragons, their flesh is foul.

Savannah Snake

  • Green in color in the wet season, dun in the dry
  • Wings are translucent ans shine gold in the sun
  • Long narrow wings, can’t fly yet can glide
  • Hunt by running after their prey, leaping up and gliding over the heard, then using their diving momentum to pull prey from the herd
  • Females are solitary, males form small groups
  • Deep chest, narrow waist; built for running
  • Extraordinary Breath: Corrosive Mist
  • Measurements: Heaviest weighed 98 kg

Arboreal Snake

  • Savannah Snakes in a different habitat

CULTURE

Draconean

  • Slight ruins are found above the lake that holds the queen dragons.
  • Ruins hold a stone with writing on it.

Other

  • Moulish worship dragons
  • Believe that the slaying of a dragon is why humans die, killing dragons is forbidden
  • The Pure (those who have never killed) tend to the Swamp-wyrm eggs, distributing them, creating queens, and shepherding males to the queens
  • Legambwa means dragon in Moulish
  • Legambwa bomu is a ritual dragon costume controlled by the children, destroys the camp when there is unrest

THE VOYAGE OF THE BASILISK

BIOLOGY

Overview

  • Dragon flesh is foul, including those of Sea Serpents.
  • Draconic lungs are more akin to avian lungs than mammalian lungs.
  • Draconic taxonomy is brought into question, given how the Six Characteristics may be less of a hard rule and ore a spectrum of traits, with some being absent or more important than others.
  • Lêng is the name given to the Yelang. Ti Lêng describe wingless, flightless dragons while Tien Lêng describe winged, flighted dragons.
    • Most are not winged, and most are water loving.
    • Most that are named are not described, so I will be guessing as to which are which.
  • Firestone is petrified dragon egg.
  • Dragon bones can be used to make caeligers.

Lesser Dragonkind

Sea Serpents

  • Blue-grey in color, with purple markings according to the cover.
  • Have front fins only, no hind fins or wings.
  • Are believed to migrate, though the details of these migratory paths are unknown.
  • Range from the tropics to the far north, with younger serpents being found in the tropics and older serpents being found up north.
  • Northern Serpents are larger than Tropical Serpents.
  • Mid Latitudes have Serpents all year round.
  • Tropical Serpents have tendrils above their eyes and on their snout, Northern Serpents lack these features.
  • Tropical Serpents can suck in vast amounts of water and then expel it, while Northern Serpents do not, instead constricting their prey.
    • Does not count as an Extraordinary Breath.
    • Difference is behavioral. Sucking in cold water would be detrimental to Northern Serpents.
  • Texts suggest the Northern Serpents are over fifteen meters in length, able to raise up fifteen meters out of the water. The cover suggests that they are longer than thirty meters.
  • Hunt sharks and other large prey, though they will eat meat of any size.
  • Have foul flesh, like land dragons.
  • Posses four fangs.
  • Females have an ovipositor.
  • Posses ctenoid scales, with some features of placoid scales.
  • Northern Serpents have thicker scales than Tropical Serpents.
    • Due to age
  • While traveling Isabella comes up with the hypothesis that Northern and Tropical Sea Serpents are two species diverging from a common ancestor. This hypothesis is proven false.
  • Eggs are laid in the water, half buried by sand. They are gelatinous to the touch, and translucent.

Wyvern

  • Live in the mountains of eastern Bulskevo and into Saiure.
  • Wings and only two legs.
  • Lack an extraordinary breath, but are venomous.

Quetzalcoatl

  • Feathered Serpents
  • Feathers are green in color, and it has a horned head.
  • At least five meters in length.
  • Sun themselves at midday.
  • Crepuscular
  • Males have a patch of red feathers beneath their throat.
  • Bones do not decay

Kulkulkan

  • A similar sort of dragon to the Quetzalcoatl, possibly a close relative.

Dragon Turtle

  • Heads resemble those of Dajin/Yelang dragons, hence the name.
  • Lêng Kuh
  • Considered a delicacy
  • Shell is two meters or more in length
  • Come ashore to lay eggs
  • Bones don’t decay

Ti Lêng

  • Hok Tsung Lêng; Subterranean.
  • Kau Lêng; Aquatic
  • Lêng Ma; Dragon Horse
  • Hung; Two Headed
    • It has a head-like club at the end of its tail
  • Pa Siah; Elephant Hunters
  • Tê Lêng
    • “Mountain Demon Dragons”
    • Grey to black in color, with stripes
    • Live in mountain rivers
    • Hornless, unusual for Dajin dragons.
    • Have the tendrils typical of their kind, as well as a fring beneath their jaws
    • Mate for life

Fire Lizard

  • Size of small cats.
  • Gregarious, with a flight containing a dozen or more members.
  • Feed on geckos, rats, insects, and birds.
  • Ground nesting.
  • Only predator is the eagle, which will only attack a Fire Lizard that it raiding a nest.
  • Range from yellow to red.
  • Breathe sparks of lightning, and can be seen flying and breathing sparks when volcanoes erupt.
  • Lack forelegs.

Komodos

  • Studies suggest that this is not a dragon at all, nor is it related to them. Rather, it is just a large lizard.
  • About three meters in length.
  • Posses either a venomous or infectious bite.

True Dragons

Moulish Swamp-Wyrm

  • Males are implied to be less than four meters in length
  • Transplanting eggs to the rivers rather than the swamps result in fewer hatching than normal, many runts, and the ones which grow fully to be large, serpentine, and possessing fine scales.
  • Become mature in a few years.

Tien Lêng

  • Bê Lêng; Winged
  • Yin Lêng
    • Note: This dragon is not described at all, rather a name is given. However, in the real world the Yinglong is a winged dragon, so I can make a guess that this is a reference to that dragon. After all, Tien Lêng is a reference to Tianlong, and Lêng Ma is a reference to Longma, and so on. However, Yinlong itself is a genus of primitive ceratopsians, so it’s possible the Yin Lêng is flightless.

CULTURE

Draconean

  • General:
    • Their language was a Syllabary
      • May have two hundred forty-one characters
    • Carved charms are found at their sites
  • Coyahuac:
    • Has many pyramid ruins from the ancient civilization.
    • Structures found here could suggest that they tamed dragons.
  • Akhia:
    • May have been the center of their civilization, with much to be found there.
  • Broken Sea
    • Numerous sunken ruins
    • Ruins on Rahuahane hold egg chambers where the Draconeans hatched dragon eggs of an unknown species.
  • Mouleen
    • The stone above the Queen Dragon Lake is bilingual, having Draconean on one half and Ngaru, a known language, on the other. Essentially, it is a Draconean Rosetta Stone.

Other

  • The fangs of a sea serpent are valued for carving.
  • The Yelangese have some success in breeding dragons in captivity.
  • The Yelangese have began hunting dragons for their bones.
  • The Puian of the Broken Sea have a concept called Ke’anaka’i. A Third Gender, these individuals exist outside of the Man/Woman binary. It is believed they are Dragon Spirited, with their spirit coming from the island of Rahuahane.
    • Naka’i or Nataki means anything from Sea Serpents to Lizards.
  • Keongans will ride Sea Serpents by grabbing their tendrils.
  • Some people keep Drakeflies in cages, like one would do with an exotic bird.

IN THE LABYRINTH OF DRAKES

BIOLOGY

Overview

  • Dragons rarely breed in captivity, with success mostly belonging to the smaller sorts.
  • A fossil claw, 30 centimeters around the curve from base to tip, would be the largest dragon claw discovered, if it belongs to a dragon.
  • Dragon eggs are sensitive to handling.

Lesser Dragonkind

Honeyseekers

  • Note: I am unsure if Honeyseekers count as Dragonkin. They seem to fulfill the required Characteristics, but the book never specifies. I have placed them here under the assumption their their spit foes not count as a true Breath.
  • Males incubate the eggs, displaying for the female until he is satisfied with the amount of eggs he has acquired. If eggs are removed from the nest, a pair can be encouraged to bred indefinitely.
  • Can eat insects when necessary, but their primary food is eucalyptus nectar.
  • Have bristled tongues for collecting nectar.
  • At most are fourteen centimeters in length.
  • Spit noxious saliva, with the toxins being derived from their diet.
  • Make their nests from saliva and leaves.
  • Females are a dull green; males are black and yellow, with blue crests.
  • If Honey Seeker eggs incubate in a nest of Tamarisk leaves instead of eucalyptus leaves, they will spit salty saliva instead of an irritating saliva.
  • When incubated at high temperatures, a female Honey Seeker which was bright orange hatched.

True Dragons

Akhian Desert Drake

  • Organ which generates their Breath can be cauterized, thus rendering them unable to breathe fire.
  • Cannot breathe fire until they are mature.
  • Mate once a year, near the end of the wet season, producing around ten eggs.
  • Take five years to reach sexual maturity, though don’t usually start breeding until they are seven.
  • Mishandled eggs can result in hatchlings whose bones are dense and heavy.
  • If a Desert Drake survives its first three years of life it can live to be forty.
  • Possess large ruffs.
  • Females are larger than males.
  • Have a unique way of hunting. They will kill a prey item then leave it as bait for scavengers. When scavengers come they kill these, eating the original bait and the new carcasses.
  • A heavily gorged Drake can go a week without food, though it also cannot fly, and must return to its lair to rest and digest its meal.
  • Females don’t lair within ten kilometers of males.
  • During the mating season a female will climb to a peak and breathe fire into the air just before dawn. This act attracts the males to her location. She will then attack whichever males she is not interested in with her fire, until only a few remain. At this point,  the female will begin her mating flight.
  • Smaller males can win a mating flight if they strike quickly, otherwise the flight becomes one of endurance.
  • Males will attack and injure one another during the flight.
  • When a male overtakes a female he will often mount her. The female must then glide with him on her back as they mate.
  • Females lay their eggs in shallow bowls of sand, returning regularly to rebury them.
  • Clutches can have six eggs.
  • Eggs have hard shells, and the inner membrane provides extra nutrients.
  • Young Desert Drakes are social, nesting together at night.
  • Desert Drakes, at least the juveniles, will hum or sing to each other.

CULTURE

Draconean

  • The Temple of Silence is found in The Labyrinth of Drakes.
  • The Labyrinth of Drakes hold many ruins, including The Watchers of Time. These are five sitting gods, which are positioned outside of a temple. The temple was hidden for thousands of years, and when rediscovered it showed signs of conflict, with the bodies of men being found within. A nest chamber is also found within, containing the footprints of long dead hatchlings.
  • The stone containing the Draconean Text becomes known as the Cataract Stone.

Other

  • Jinn are believed to be spirits born from the smokeless fire of Desert Drakes.
  • Most conflicts between humans and Drakes occur with juveniles.

WITHIN THE SANCTUARY OF WINGS

BIOLOGY

Overview

  • Developmental Lability has replaced the Six Characteristics as the main way to classify dragons.
    • This refers to how the incubation conditions can drastically affect what hatches from the egg.
  • That being said, the term True Dragon is still used to describe members with the Six Characteristics.
  • Dragon Bones rarely break.
  • There seems to be some commonality in Draconic Behavior, which allows Draconeans to tame and domesticate their wild kin.

Dragons

Mews

  • Cope with the cold by shedding their wing membrane in the spring before regrowing it.
  • Are pests, often raiding stores and diving at yaks.
  • The cause of this behavior of yak diving comes from the Draconeans, who domesticated the Mews to herd their own yaks.
  • Have no Breath, and therefore are not True Dragons.
  • Are named for their call, which sounds like a cat.

Ce Lêng

  • Based off the cover of the book, the Ci Lêng has a very complex life cycle. The juveniles begin life with six legs, and they lack the horns and tendrils of the adults. As they grow, their second set of forelimbs start to develop into wings, and they grow the horns and tendrils of the adults.
  • They are large enough to carry a man.
  • The Draconeans are able to train Ci Lêng to perform a sort of complex dance.
  • Are a relatively tame variety of dragons.

Draconeans

  • The species originated from dragon eggs incubating in human blood. However, once the species began they were able to interbreed to perpetuate it.
  • Two meters tall.
  • Females are more common than males, with there being three to five times as many females as males.
  • Can shut off the blood flow to their wings. This is an adaptation to their cold climates, where reducing the blood flow to their wings would be beneficial.
    • As a result, wing spreading is used as a dominance display.
  • Are omnivorous, which is also most likely an adaptation to their environment.
  • Firestone is the petrified remains of Draconean Eggs. The potion used to petrify them was lost to history. Whether or not this process would work on other species is unspecified.
  • Hibernate during the winter.
  • Are capable of gliding, but not full flight.

CULTURE

Draconean

  • The Draconean creation myth tells of four sisters. When they bathed, the waters from their mouths became the first brother, the water from their backs became dragons, and the water from their fronts became humans.
  • Modern Draconeans believe that Ancient Draconeans ruled over humans because they believe humans came from them.
  • Ancient Draconeans seemed to be aware of their species Blood origin.
  • Modern Draconeans live in sister groups, made up of two to five sisters, though three to four is most common.
  • In order to keep their herd tended to during the winter, one sister group is placed in charge of tending to the village. These groups do not keep watch back to back years.
  • Draconeans live in sister groups, usually made up of three to five females.
  • Since females are common and males are rare, the sexes have different jobs.
    • Females do most of the work, including tending to the herds, farming, and acting as guards and patrols.
    • Males serve as the religious leaders and artists, as well as raising and teaching the young.
  • Every female in a sister group is viewed as the mother of their child group.
  • The Draconeans see the number four as a lucky number.
  • The Draconean language can be learned and spoken by humans.
  • Their religion is focused heavily on the sky, and the deceased are left out for carrion birds to pick at and carry away.
  • “Anevrai” is used to refer to the Ancient Draconeans.
  • A single sister group, along with a male rule each village. The Draconeans as a whole are ruled by an Elder Group.

Other

  • Yelang see dragons as a good omen, with folklore saying that the first Emperor was crowned by dragons in human forms.
  • Many human legends suggest that the Draconeans were cruel tyrants.

FROM THE EDITORIAL PAGE OF THE FALCHESTER WEEKLY REVIEW

BIOLOGY

Overview

  • While species of dragons with feathers exist, there are no known species with both feathers and scales. Since the Drakefly was depicted with feet similar to those of birds, we can presume that the scutes of birds do not count as scales.

Lesser Dragonkind

Wyvern

  • Since the Cockatrice is actually a taxidermy Wyvern, we can infer that the Wyvern is a biped, and that it has at least three fingers. The first two fingers do not support the wing membrane.
  • Wyverns can be taxidermied, suggesting their skeletons do not decay after death. However, as this story takes place after the secret to preserving dragon bone has gotten out, their skeletons still may decay.

Immediately after the screen cuts to black, Aoi Kurashiki runs up to Delta and punches in the face.

“Mind Hack this, asshole!”

He sneers. “You can throw as much of your misplaced anger at me if you like, but it will not change the facts. You cannot arrest me without any evide-”

Kyle Klim drives up in a semi truck loaded up with delta’s sci-fi bullshit, honking the horn like an excited five year old. Light is sitting in the passenger seat. looking mildly exasperated.

“Hey Aoi! We intercepted that truck like you told us to! Another victory for K team!”

He hold his hand out for a high five, which Light begrudgingly accepts.

anonymous asked:

people actually stan kendall jenner lmao??? stan her for what? being the most boring human being alive? being problematic as fuck? the fact that she never apologizes for doing problematic shit and never learns from it? being a terrible model? being ignorant? the fact that she's only a model cause of nepotism? being able to show one (1) single emotion when modeling? that emotion being boredom? not knowing what a good runway walk is even if it slapped her right in her boring ass face? cant relate!

DID YOU SEE THAT TWITTER THREAD OF HER OWN FANS EXPOSING HER, I WAS ABOUTTA HUNT HER DOWN FOR THAT VIDEO OF HER HONKING HER CAR HORN FOR FIVE MINS STRAIGHT'

Panromantic ace Luna Lovegood tells quoiromantic ace Hermione Granger about the aro and ace spectrums one day when she finds Hermione sitting alone in a corridor with her face in her hands. 

Hermione Granger loves many things. Her studies. Crookshanks. House elf equality and S.P.E.W. Her parents. Chocolate cake and the color red. Ron and Harry. She never really cared much for “attractive people” but it never really bothered her before. She figured it’s just something that girls like Lavender and Parvati care about (not that there’s anything wrong with that).

But today, it all becomes too much. Hermione completely breaks down in front of Luna because she doesn’t understand society’s obsession with sex and romance and attraction.

“Luna, why are people so obsessed with abs, and breasts, and bodies?” Hermione doesn’t expect Luna to be of much help at all, because Luna doesn’t seem to follow the rules of society anyway, much less pay them any attention; Luna never seems to care what others think. What Hermione doesn’t expect is for Luna to first explain the science behind it (Luna is, after all, a Ravenclaw), then explain that if Hermione doesn’t understand attraction, she might be on the aromantic or asexual spectrums. 

Hermione doesn’t believe the words are real at first, because she thinks Luna has a tendency to believe in far-flung theories and to use made-up words. Hermione dries her tears and gives Luna a weak smile. Even if asexuality isn’t real, at least someone understands her. At least she’s told someone how she feels. 

Later that day, Hermione looks it up in the library, and cannot believe that she had never found the words before. For someone as smart as herself, she should have figured it out earlier. She finds Luna and thanks her profusely for teaching her something new, and something so important to her at that. 

“Of course,” Luna says; her tone is serious but she is smiling. “We’re just as real as the Crumple-Horned Snorkack. It just takes some looking to find us.”