it’s a friday afternoon when sana asks isak a question.
“isak, don’t you ever feel like you don’t fit in with the boys?”
isak looks at her and frowns a little. he’d been midway through talking about how annoying vilde and magnus are, and he hadn’t really anticipated her question.
but he notices the seriousness in her expression. the little bit of vulnerability in her eyes. how it seems like it took a lot for her to ask that.
so, he replies as seriously as he can.
“sure, sometimes,” he admits. “sometimes it’s like…all they want to talk about is hooking up with chicks, or which girls are the hottest or whatever.” he shakes his head. “it isn’t like they mean to leave me out, but it’s not like i join in with that stuff either. it can be kind of awkward when all they want to do is talk about hooking up with girls.”
sana simply nods. and isak studies her, noticing the trouble on her face. “is everything okay?”
sana nods again. quickly and a little dismissively. because sana doesn’t want to bitch about her friends - or come across like she’s bitching about her friends. she would never want to say anything negative about them, even if it eats her up inside. and isak isn’t about to pressure her into talking if she doesn’t feel like it, so he just nods, too, and says, “okay.”
but a little later, the girl squad joins them. and isak notices something. notices how sana’s eyes fall to her knees when they come over; how she seems distant. detached from her friends. completely removed from the conversation, really. and how, worse yet, none of sana’s friends seem to notice.
when vilde asks sana whether she’ll be able to make it to the party tomorrow - and asks whether she can persuade elias and his friends to come too - isak sees how uncomfortable sana looks. how she opens her mouth, stuttering over an excuse she can’t bring herself to make.
she just seems tired, above all else, and isak remembers so, so clearly how that feels. like your friends don’t get you. don’t understand you. how suffocating it can be to experience that.
so, isak says, “but, sana, i thought you agreed to help me and even unpack the rest of our stuff tomorrow?”
and sana looks at him, frowning, because no, she didn’t. but he just widens his eyes a little, as if to say, the excuse is there if you need it. and sana smiles a tiny bit - barely there - before saying, “yeah, sorry, i said i’d help them.”
later, when it’s just isak and sana again, he gets up to leave - he’s meeting even at kb in a bit - and he says, “see you tomorrow, then, sanasol.”
and sana, confused, says, “you weren’t serious about me helping you unpack, were you? haven’t you finished unpacking?”
and isak just smirks, frowning a little, shaking his head. “yeah, we’ve finished unpacking. but you’re still coming over, right?”
sana just looks at him and says, “what for?”
isak shrugs. “just thought we could all hang together, if that’s chill.”
and sana smiles softly, eyes warm, and usually she’d tease him or something but she doesn’t feel like it all of a sudden. because, actually, the idea of hanging with isak and even seems like just the thing she needs right now.
“yeah,” she says. “that’s chill.”