hook that guy up

anonymous asked:

HARRY AND CANDICE ARE FOLLOWING EACHOTHER ON TWITTER! THEY’RE HOOKING UP!

candice is married with a child. do you guys EVER shut up?

Who wants a story about how big of an asshole I am?  Everyone?  Wow, ok!

So we have this friend whose nickname to us is ‘shitty daughter.’ It’s a long story, but this friend of ours basically stayed with us for a while due to him coming on hard times.  We helped him out a lot, both for a place to stay as well as financially.  Thus, he was dubbed our ‘shitty daughter.’

well, we just shared our hulu account info with him because share the wealth, right?  we said he could use it on one condition.  and that condition was him naming his profile on the account as ‘shitty daughter.’ that way, every time i open hulu i can see it and laugh, and if he has some guy over trying to hook up and wants to put on hulu, he has to click ‘shitty daughter’ and explain himself.

everyone wins.  well, mostly me.  but still.

that is all.

EDIT: We told him we would change the password and not tell him if we saw that his name wasn’t ‘shitty daughter.’

It’s Goin’ Down Part 2

Originally posted by imultifandomstuff

Summary: Peter Pans daughter goes to The Isle of the Lost and meets Harry Hook. A month later he moves to Auradon

A/N: Part 1 Prequel slight warning: make out session

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anonymous asked:

Excuse me, but... why do you hate when straight woman go to a gay bar? I'm a straight woman and I live in Madrid, and here lot of straight people like going out around the gay area (Chueca). I sometimes go with my boyfriend, with my friends, and sometimes with my gay friends, who are very happy I go out with them in Chueca. For me, going to a gay bar is like going to any other bar. Wouldn't be homophobe if I said, no way I am gonna go to a gay bar/gay area? Sorry for my english.

Hi love. Your English is fine! 

This is a complicated issue, and I will try and speak about it to the best of my ability. First off: if I said I hate when straight women go to gay bars, I was speaking hyperbolically and being reactionary, which is totally my right as a lesbian who seeks safe space the same way any gay man does. But the truth is,  that I don’t SIMPLY hate it, every time, always. I hate the way it changes how gay bars feel to me, and I hate the culture it creates and lends itself to. It’s something I have nuanced and complex feelings about. 

Like, I understand why straight women enjoy going to gay bars. I know often times straight women just want to have a good time and get away from straight men, and as someone who ALSO wants desperately to get away from straight men,  I get how gay bars can provide that space. 

However, many straight women can be super disrespectful to that space because they don’t understand the historical significance of gay bars for gay people. Here are some of the things that are really damaging that I see on the regular. Not all of them are specific things all straight women do at gay bars, but they ARE inevitable affects of the PRESENCE of straight women and straight culture within an LGBTQ space: 

1. straight women sometimes get offended when lesbians hit on them at gay bars, which is absurd because….it’s a gay bar. You’re in our space. I also regularly witness straight women acting particularly disparaging or even DISGUSTED by butch women in gay bars, which really hurts and is so cruel and disrespectful. The amount of times I’ve seen gay men band together with straight women to mock butch culture/appearances is innumerable. 

2. At least in LA, its become such a commonplace thing for LOTS of straight women to go to gay bars, that they out number the amount of lesbians/wlw. First off, this just feels awful and isolating for us, but additionally, it makes lots of wlw so uncomfortable that they don’t feel safe cruising/asking women to dance because the probability of the girl being straight is really high. Can you imagine how lonely, scary, and frustrating this would feel for wlw to go to a bar that is supposed to be FOR THEM and feel afraid and outnumbered by straight women? 

3. Lots of straight women treat gay bars like some wild tourist space.  They get to come to the gay part of town and watch the gays interact in their natural habitat, they get to see crazy wild freaky things like boys in make up and butch girls in plaid and go-go dancers and hot guys making out! How titillating and exciting and funny! Now, I’m not saying you do this, personally, but you have to understand that MANY straight women DO. It feels awful and hurtful to just want to go out and dance and be yourself AWAY from the cruelty and scrutiny of straight people, and end up at a bar where you’re getting watched like a sideshow ANYWAY. 

4. Many straight women bring their boyfriends. For numerous wlw and MANY gay men, straight men are traumatizing. They are our abusers. They’re the last thing we want to see in our safe space. NOTHING makes me feel more unsafe and invaded and shitty at a gay bar than the presence of straight men. And if there are straight women, there are likely going to be straight men, at least eventually.  Now, even aside from them making me feel flat out unsafe an horrible, it’s also just disheartening and irritating to see straight couples taking up space in an LGBTQ environment when I’m literally trying to get away from them! I don’t want to see straight people making out. I don’t to see straight people dancing. I don’t want to see straight people standing by the bar pointing at us. If I wanted all that, I wouldn’t be going to a GAY BAR.  

5. Again, at least in LA, it’s so common for straight women to go to gay bars that straight men will actually go to gay bars with the intention of finding straight women, because they KNOW it’s a place where single women congregate. I kid you not, it’s a pick up artist “trick” to go to gay bars. This means, predatory straight men in LGBTQ spaces, trying to hit on women. This INCLUDES WLW because sometimes they can’t tell the difference or literally don’t care!!! I DO NOT WANT to be around straight men, even the ones who are there with their girlfriends, so I ESPECIALLY don’t want to be around the type of straight guy who is looking for a hook up!  I don’t want to be hit on my straight men, I don’t want my bi friends or my femme friends who came to a gay bar looking for solace and to escape unwanted attention to be hit on or checked out by straight men IN THEIR OWN SPACE!!!

I remember the first time a straight man hit on me at a gay bar, I started dancing with him, close and kind of sexy, because it’s not uncommon for lesbians to dance with gay men like that in a playful way. Then, he started touching me, and I thought it was a little weird but was like “whatever he’s probably gay” and THEN HE KISSED ME and it was like my fucking world came crashing down. I felt so terrified and unsafe and dirty, and when I tried to scramble away and was like “Oh my god I’m gay stop” he literally said, and I will never forget this, “I don’t care. You didn’t a minute ago.” 

Whether or not you realize it, the presence of straight women in LGBTQ spaces leads to the eventual normalization of this type of behavior. Straight people and particularly straight men are ALWAYS coopting space that doesn’t belong to them and making it unsafe for LGBTQ people, who are ostracized outsiders who live in danger everywhere else. If I can’t go to a gay bar to get away from these types of men, where can I go? If my friends can’t go to a gay bar to pick up women, where can they go? 

NOW, you mentioned you were from Spain. I have never been to Spain and have relatively no idea what the gay scene/bar scene is like there. Some of this might not be relevant to you personally, and I’m sensitive to the fact I’m speaking from the experience of someone who grew up clubbing in West Hollywood/LA, so this might not apply to you. It might be different in Spain, and I get that you want to support your gay friend when you go out with him. That makes sense to me, and I know there are ways straight women can be respectful in LGBTQ spaces. 

But please, consider all of this. Also, you said something that really stuck out to me: “ For me, going to a gay bar is like going to any other bar.”

That stings, because for us, going to a gay bar is NOT like going to any other bar. Going to a gay bar is like going home, or it should be. You have to understand we don’t get to feel safe or supported most of the time when we exist in the world. We have to seek out those safe spaces, so when those safe spaces get infiltrated by the people who make the rest of the world unsafe for us, IT HURTS. We don’t want gay bars to be like any other bar, they need to be treated as the very specific, historically significant, cultural phenomenon that they are. It’s not just a rainbow on the wall that makes a gay bar a gay bar. I hope that makes sense. 

Further reading here! 

Kookies And Cream

Word Count: 11.6k (oh man holy shit)

Genre: Smut, Angst, Fluff. The whole package. 

Author’s Note: You know the definition of a switch? Just look at the two characters in this story lol switch heaven

2k Requests, Masterlist


When Jungkook first came to room with you, you were less than ecstatic about it. You had only ever roomed with one other person before at the start of your freshman year of college, but you quickly got fed up with it. Not that your roommate was bad or anything. In fact, if you were being fair, you’d admit that she was a sweetheart. But you are an only child, and you were never used to sharing anything with anyone, and despite what everyone said about the joys of having siblings, you simply weren’t interested. You have none and that’s the way you liked it.

Tell that to your parents though. They were convinced that you needed the company after years of keeping mostly to yourself unless you had to, with the exception of a couple of close friends. They thought that if you keep at it, you’re going to turn insane from being in your head too much. Where they got that shit piece of pseudo-psychology you don’t know but it had enough hold on their minds to make them force you to get a room in the college dorms -yuck- and live with a stranger for an entire month.

Or it would’ve been a month anyway if you hadn’t made that poor girl’s life a living hell so much so that by the end of the third week, she was running away from your shared dorm room like the devil himself was behind her.

The series of students who came and went through your dorm didn’t last long enough to qualify as roommates. Your record was six hours, that’s how long it took to send one dude,-Hoseok, you’ll never forget the name- running for his life. It’s a shame too, he was cute, and you had to forever ruin your chances with him. But, oh well, there are much more important things in life, like having a bathroom all to yourself.

Soon enough, your college caught on to your reign of terror and they, not so kindly, asked you to vacate the premises and restore the harmony to the student body. Your parents were forced to rent an apartment for you, seeing as you weren’t allowed in the dorms anymore and they lived too far away for you to stay with them. Yeah, they could’ve withheld their money from you and taught you an important lesson about the consequences of being such a spoiled child but they loved you too much to do that. They’ve never been able to deal any real punishment to their baby girl, and that’s probably how you turned out to be so headstrong.

Little did you know, however, that your comeuppance was coming for you. It took three years, three long years where you enjoyed your solitude to the max, but as your fourth and final year came around, instead of the peaceful climax you were counting on it to be, it turned into a shitshow of the highest degree with the arrival of a certain bunny-toothed brat.

Jungkook is the son of your family’s next door neighbours. But other than the daily ‘Good mornings’ and the occasional dinner invitation, your families weren’t really close, and the only contact you had with their shy son was that one year you tutored him in math. To be sure, you were shit at math but that didn’t stop you from attempting to make some money off the kid.

You see, Jungkook had a painfully obvious puppy crush on you, and even though you didn’t teach him shit, and what you did teach him was mindbogglingly wrong, he still never spoke a word of it to his parents, studying on his own and getting good marks just so he’d keep seeing you.

To say that you were a bitch to him would be an understatement. You’d frequently invite your boyfriends over, taking advantage of the fact that his parents were never around because of their jobs, and using his place to hook up with them, knowing Jungkook would never tell on you. You did not care or even notice much that you were breaking the boy’s heart.

Eventually, though, he got sick of your shit and asked you to stop coming over. But he still didn’t tell either of your parents, ever the sweet kid. You didn’t hear or see much of him after that, and you suspect that was intentionally his doing, until now.

As if the universe was punishing you for all your sins against the boy, it made him appear again in your life, but this time you were the one who was going to suffer.

On the last day of your summer break, your mum dropped the bomb on you, informing you that your old pupil was to shack up with you this year, and no amount of whining or begging or scheming was going to get you out of it. She gave you an ultimatum: either you let him room with you and look after him, or she stops giving you money and leaves your spoiled ass out in the cold to fend for yourself. Any funny business from you and you’re done.

You were in denial at first, convincing yourself that it couldn’t possibly be that bad. From what you remembered of Jungkook, he was a shy kid who did anything humanly possible to please you. You were sure that his crush must be long gone by now but he would still be the timid boy you remembered. Right?

Wrong. Jungkook was the devil incarnate.

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HOW SKAM’S ISAK AND EVEN REVOLUTIONIZED TEEN TV

The third season of Norwegian teen series Skam dismantled stereotypes, coerced schoolkids into skiving off classes and turned homophobes into rainbow flag-waving defenders—and it first began airing one year ago today. It was the “gay” season, charting the blossoming relationship of Isak Valtersen and Even Bech Næsheim, both coming to terms with their sexuality amidst a cutting background of teenage angst. Taking every fan poll I’ve ever come across into account, season three was by far Skam’s most popular. It broke streaming records in Norway, and television viewership records in neighboring Denmark and Sweden. Throughout its 10-episode run, it hardly left the list of worldwide trending topics on any given social platform.

With a short promo clip that could have been a stand in for a gay snuff film—jockish throbs in a locker room being showered with milk in slow motion—the series wasn’t afraid to shy away from explicitly homosexual subject matter. Or any hot button subject. Homophobia, bullying, mental health—nothing was off the cards for series creator Julie Andem.

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— off limits | 06 (m)

pairing— kim seokjin x reader
genre/warnings— angst, smut and fluff !! Seokjin finally grows some balls ;)
words— 14,153

:: summary— you’ve been lusting after your brother’s best friend for a while now, ever since you met him at a house party, flirting it up a storm as you failed to realise who the other was. That was months ago now and things are still awkward, but you can’t ignore the sexual tension that’s simmers between the two of you…and it keeps getting worse…

  » 01 :: 02 :: 03 :: 04 :: 05 :: 06 :: 07 ::

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How Skam’s Isak and Even revolutionized teen TV

The third season of Norwegian teen series Skam dismantled stereotypes, coerced schoolkids into skiving off classes and turned homophobes into rainbow flag-waving defenders—and it first began airing one year ago today. It was the “gay” season, charting the blossoming relationship of Isak Valtersen and Even Bech Næsheim, both coming to terms with their sexuality amidst a cutting background of teenage angst. Taking every fan poll I’ve ever come across into account, season three was by far Skam’s most popular. It broke streaming records in Norway, and television viewership records in neighboring Denmark and Sweden. Throughout its 10-episode run, it hardly left the list of worldwide trending topics on any given social platform.

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Les amis are actual students okay

I think it is important to remember that the amis are students and that if they had lived today, they most likely would have lived in student housing aka shared flats with a disgusting kitchen that is cleaned once every term.

Les amis (and others) as that guy you end up living with in your first year of uni:

Enjolras: That guy who always puts up angry notes about how everyone needs to clean up after themselves (but never does it himself)

Bossuet: That guy who sets off the fire alarm at 6 in the morning every third week.

Cosette: That guy who’s always saying “I need to get back to studying” and then stays in the kitchen chatting about nothing for another three hours.

Montparnasse: That guy at the end of the corridor that no-one has ever seen, and who might be dead, or might have moved out months ago. No-one knows.

Jehan: That guy who always cooks or bakes for everyone in the flat.

Joly: The only guy who actually does any cleaning or takes out the trash. Also “tests” his flatmates every now and then to see if they would notice if he just leaves the trash to rot in the corner of the kitchen. They never do, and he gives up after a couple of days because it’s just filthy and he can’t live like this.

Musichetta: That guy who has friends over ALL. THE. TIME.

Feuilly: That guy who isn’t a student and who is illegally staying in his “friend’s” room for “just a few days” for the whole year.

Courfeyrac: That guy who always has really loud sex.

Bahorel: That guy who is trying to hook up with everyone in the flat.

Éponine: That guy who steals everyone’s food and cutlery all the time.

Combeferre: That guy who seems to live of Pot Noodles and coffee.

Grantaire: That guy who never wears proper clothes.

Marius: That guy who passes out in the hallway every weekend.

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he made milk steak

Virgin-less

Summary: Your friends mock you for being a virgin so you turn to tinder.

Pairing: Jeon Jeong-guk/ Reader

Genre: Fluff (eventual smut)

Words: 3.4k

A/N: Basically I quickly wrote this to rant on how much friends suck…the first part of this story actually happen to me and its literally hell but unfortunately I dont have a tinder and never will, unless Jungkook really has one ;) lol jk

Masterlist | Part 2

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message from anon: 179 sounds super fun (with tom obviously because peter is 15 lol)

IVE BEEN WAITING TO USE 179 OHFFBJR

#179- “first one to make a noise loses.”

i haven’t been adding a gif, but this one needs one.

Originally posted by tomhollandisdaddy

i’mscreamingatthewayhelooksatthecamera.


he let out a groan as he tried sliding they keycard into the hotel door. you weren’t helping either. he had you wrapped around his torso, your arms around his neck. he just wanted the damn thing to open. 

it finally opened and he quickly walked into the room, closing the door with his foot as he started kissing your neck again. you guys were in Atlanta to film for homecoming. everyone else was in Jacob’s room, talking. the two of you left, the rest of them joking about how you guys were gonna go hook up, and yet, it happened.

he walked you to the bed before placing you down. he tugged off his shirt, revealing his toned body before tossing it to the side carelessly. your body grew in anticipation as he climbed on top of you before kissing you. his hands traveled down your body as they finally landed on the hem of the shirt, tugging at it.

you leaned up into his body as he tugged the shirt over your head, leaving you in your bra. he tossed it behind his head before kissing at your skin. you held the back of his head, playing with his hair as he left hickies.

“let’s play a game.” you breathed and he looked at you confused.

first one to make a noise loses.” you said and he smirked down at you.

“you’re on.” he said before attaching his lips to yours. you kissed him back as he found the button on your jeans before sliding them down your legs. you kicked them off as he climbed in-between your legs, admiring your body.

it was going to be hard to stay quiet, but you knew you could make him crack. you just had to wait for the perfect timing. 

he leaned down and kissed your lips again, this time he drug your bottom lip out as he pulled away before going to your collarbone. his hands found the waistband of your panties before he put his hands between your skin. you were on fire, you just wanted to touch him. 

you pushed him down on the bed before climbing onto him, straddling his waist. you tugged at his belt before tossing it to the side. you pushed down his jeans, tossing them aside.

you grinded your hips into his as he bit down on his bottom lip to keep him from making a noise. you decided on moving your hands around his body, making him want to lose more and more as every second passed. 

you knew you were going to win, you had this. you leaned forward and tugged on his hair, making him let out a groan. 

you smiled at yourself for making him crack.

“dammit.” he mumbled before flipping you so he was on top.

“you lost, buddy.” you said,”so i don’t know what you think you’re doing.”

“my turn to make you lose.” he said before kissing your neck, working his way down your skin. 


this sucks i know i’m so sorry

decisions (pt. 2)

summary; shawn and y/n see each other after weeks and months of missed phone calls and unanswered texts, but when they finally find a time to talk, hearts only continue to get broken.

PART ONE || PART THREE

MASTERLIST || REQUEST


It had felt like a stab in the back, but you couldn’t seem to pull the knife out. Shawn had chosen his girlfriend over you, and you couldn’t deny the obvious: you felt betrayed. You so badly wanted all of this to be a nightmare and to run into the arms of your bestfriend, but you knew that was no longer an option. 

The past three days have had you consumed with trying to get a hold of Shawn, begging for him to hear you out. Your heart told you to leave him be and to hate Shawn, but you couldn’t even will a finger to do so. The six going on seven year friendship between you and Shawn was too valuable to give up without a fight, but it was hard fighting a battle single-handedly. You might’ve been mad at the moment, but as much as you hated to admit it, you couldn’t ever get yourself to fully hate Shawn.

Luckily for you, Ian, Geoff, and Matt had been over at your house trying to comfort you since the night that everything blew over. You were initially surprised how they sided with you knowing how close they were to Shawn, but you were grateful for their support nonetheless. They’d check up on you, bring you food, and gave you the company that your heart so badly needed. The three were like the older brothers you never had.

“Seriously, thank you guys so much for doing all of this,” You gestured to all of the snacks, drinks, and games they brought over to you face.

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