honor curves

9

Lavender fields and Lemonade vibes 💜💛

All clothing items from Primark.

3

I’m obsessed with these trees so naturally I had to go to the park and take pictures with them.

17 year old me hated having her picture taken.
I remember one of my family members took a candid photo of me while we were at the beach and I was so horrified by it that I laid in bed that night, SOBBING over it, resolving that I would go on a diet first thing in the morning. I only used to feel good about myself when I was dieting because I was raised to believe I would only be worth loving if I was trying to become skinny.
But yesterday, after climbing up onto a big slab of concrete in an alleyway, directly adjacent to one of the busiest streets in town and having people turn a full 90 degrees in their seats, gawking at me as they drove past, to pose as my husband took photos of me, I realized how far I’ve come. I’m not gonna lie, I still feel vulnerable in those moments because I’m always prepared to see the pictures afterwards and feel the way I did that day at the beach. But somehow yesterday I managed to lay down (AKA my most unflattering pose) and actually get a shot that I loved and made me feel beautiful. Something my teenage self would have never even DREAMT of doing.
I guess what I’m trying to get across is that, A. Loving yourself doesn’t happen overnight. After a lifetime of being told that you’re nothing, it’s going to take some time to feel like you’re something. And B. Do the things that scare you because you have to fall before you can fly.

6

I felt so pretty and fierce today and wanted to have pictures taken of my new hairstyle that I’m so in love with and some of the clothes I bought from Primark when I was in London last month.

OOTD Details:

Bag - Primark
Shoes - Primark
Skirt - Forever 21
Shirt - Primark
Necklace - Forever 21
Sunglasses - Primark

Follow me on Instagram: @saaamohhh

It’s the dreamers. The misfits. The artisans. The blue collars. The ones that just never quite fit in everywhere. They are the ones that bring such magic to this world.

I’ll never be a petite thing. I’ll never be like the other girls. I’ll never stop choosing a night of smoking and painting over a night of dressing up for some fancy place. My soul is alive in nature. The qualities that made me feel like a freak this whole lifetime were really just gifts to those that met me.

Be a freak. Be different. Not for the sake of being different, but just so you can feel good in your skin and live a life that makes you happy…

Wake the fuck up.

4

So this is me embracing my crippling fear of form fitting dresses. It took an hour to work up the courage to even take it off the rack and once I was in the changing room I made sure I danced around until I felt absolutely beautiful 🍃

And I don’t wanna be alone forever
But I can be tonight
I don’t wanna be alone forever
But I love gypsy life
I don’t wanna be alone forever
Maybe we can see the world together
I don’t wanna be alone forever
But I can be tonight

-

All of us are so scared to be alone. As a society we are focused on love stories. Focused on sex. Focused on being what is attractive to others.

We pretend we aren’t afraid with lies. Put walls up and push away all because we are somehow afraid of being alone or rejected.

But what if we gave ourselves the freedom to be alone? The freedom to be truly alone. No attachments. No casual sex to stoke the ego. Not even a wink. That maybe if we finally gave ourselves that freedom we could really finally live our lives to the fullest potential?

We would discover so much.

I’ve spent most of my adult life single. After my boyfriend and I of 4 years broke up, I did a small bit of partying, had a one night stand that ruined them for me, and then just decided to be alone. I made the decision to just do what I loved. In that time I truly did things for me. I spent 4 years celibate and built an incredible life for myself.

I find that each time I follow this leap of faith forwards myself, my world changes. Really just choosing to be alone for now in the last few months has really helped me get back to my roots. It’s made me finally look in the mirror and be ok going to bed with that person every night.

Through my time being single, I’ve been so blessed by the lack of attachment. I’ve photographed my favorite bands. I’ve started a successful business. I’ve traveled To Colorado, Portland, Baltimore, Washington DC, New York… and even to kayaking in Puerto Rico. The things you can do and learn to survive through on your own will surprise you.

I don’t want to be alone for my whole life. But I can be. So for now I’m going to soak up the sun, look sexy for myself, and not give two fucks until someone comes along that is interesting and strong enough to distract me from living my fucking life. Then maybe they can mix their awesome life with mine. Because in the end that’s the incredible love that’s worth a damn.

Go live it up.

9

This dress makes even my flat pancake butt look huge. Susie hasn’t decorated her tree, but it’s a great backdrop for ootd shoots. Also, Susie and I are so happy military-style coats and jackets are back in the style so we can get away with wearing all the bright buttoned pieces.

Size: 22-24, 3x-4x, 47"/49"/56"
Dress: Plussizefix.com
Leggings: Torrid
Knee boots: Remonte
Jacket: Deb (are Deb stores even still a thing? I got this forever ago omg)