honestly even this makes me emotional

anonymous asked:

i finally had time to read katie's like 10 interviews and icb she just shades, says fuck, talks about how hot and kind everyone is, supports sc, and makes bad jokes. every time i have to hear something about assuming lena's bad or untrustworthy i have to stop myself from screaming but otherwise this is glorious. she took me thru at least 10 different emotions from start to finish

i love one (1) woman………….. honestly she never even talks abt Lena becoming evil with conviction, she says the company line on how Lena’s alliances are ambiguous or whatever n then immediately goes on to talk abt how good Lena is and how she’s not a quitter lmao she really is That woman

2

Based on @midnightstarlightwrites‘s super cute ladrien ficlet because HNNNNNNNNG //clutches heart//

Also happy 2 years of ML. There are honestly just not enough words in the English language to express how much this show will always mean to me. There are so many important people in my life that I would never even have met if not for ML, and I’m beyond grateful to every one of them for being my friends, and to the creators of the show for making that possible. //throws emotions at you guys//

3

Two years ago just a few minutes of Tae’s voice was enough to win over Iris Stevenson, a vocal trainer and famous music instructor in the US. Someone who has a different background, someone who doesn’t speak Korean, someone who sings in a different main language than Tae, someone who had probably not been familiar with Bangtan prior to this time, recognized a special quality in his voice.

Most people know that Taehyung has always had a soulful, beautiful voice and a rare kind of depth when he sings. But the finesse and feeling and style he has developed over the years really makes me proud. Honestly music speaks for itself and causes us to feel and become aware of the emotions we harbor that we sometimes didn’t even know existed. Taehyung’s voice makes the listener yearn; the genuine quality in his voice brings about feeling, with the gentle ups and downs, swings, and all the inhale and exhales. True gem. I’m sure Iris would be proud.

i know namjoon gets a lot of acknowledgement for using english to talk to international fans (as well he should), but i also really want to praise the rest of the members too. they may not be fluent but they’re trying so hard to learn even if its just a few words here and there. it honestly makes me so happy and grateful when they use english on the vlive chats or in videos. they don’t even have to do all that, but seeing that they’re so eager to communicate with everyone and the fact that they put in so much work to do so is incredibly heartwarming. i hope they know that all their efforts are genuinely appreciated and that we love them so much for it.

Hunter x Hunter (2011)

Final Rate: S
Cry-o-meter: 4/5

Positives

+First of all, holy shit
+The protagonists are extremely likable, well-written, and complex. 
+I’ve never been more invested in a cast of characters 
+The villains are also likable, well-written, and complex. I can’t believe this show threw the most irredeemable ruthless killer at me and then made me cry over him.
+A well paced, slow-burn story that starts deceptively lighthearted and then gets dark and violent and genuinely upsetting
+Stellar character development. Everyone gets a turn to be the antihero and I fucking love it.
+Actions have actual consequences and the show isn’t afraid to kill off characters
+Intense and creative fight scenes
+The Phantom Troupe arc was dope as all hell
+Kurapika is the accumulation of all of my least favorite tropes but it’s played completely straight and he’s my favorite 
+The art gradually increases in quality. It starts off kinda mediocre but by the end of the show it’s great
+It progresses almost like an RPG. The characters start off level one, with not a whole lot of skills or punch, and by the end they’re level 100 or so. The main characters don’t start off powerful (with maybe a small exception to Killua).
+The characters train? They actually train to get better? This is such a little thing but you can actually watch their progress.
+That *iconic* shot when Killua goes full-electric mode for the first time
+It’s not cheesy! it’s not! It seems like the show that would be really cheesy with a lot of angry screaming but it’s not!
+No filler! Everything is plot relevant!

Negatives
-It’s been on hiatus for a while because the creator is dealing with back problems and people aren’t all that hopeful about it continuing 
-I need more Kurapika! The last clip of him at the very end just left me wanting to see more of him. The next arc in the manga is actually focused on Kurapika and Leorio but it won’t be animated for a while…
-The Chimera Ant arc probably could have been cut down in length, and a lot of the character designs were goofy. It changed and became better, but still. 
-The Alluka mini-arc didn’t really do it for me. She didn’t have any character depth, she came out of nowhere, and it didn’t make me feel those sweet sweet emotions the show usually provides
-Hisoka pops a boner for a 12 year old 
-”sorry but you take second place to alluka lol” b i t ch after everything you’d been through together?
-Unfinished, for now.

Final Comments: Holy fuck I wasn’t expecting to like this show as much as I did. Easily joined my list of personal favorites. I honestly can’t even say anything but if you love that slow burn frog-in-a-frying-pan type of show then you’ll love it. The pacing is so good, I love everyone, honestly please give it a chance and don’t get turned off if the first few episodes aren’t your style. 

wordmage-girl  asked:

Why do you want to fight Nicholas Sparks? And how would you challenge him (thrown glove, e-vite, etc)?

Thrown glove, definitely. This has to be PERSONAL, even though my problem with him is really everything he represents.

I have talked before about how his brand of dreck has basically killed the romcom, but I don’t think I’ve talked about why I hate his brand of dreck, so gather around, chickadees, for “How do I hate thee, Nicholas Sparks? Let me count the ways.”

1. Tragedy porn. Look, honestly, I liked “A Walk to Remember.” Mostly because of “Only Hope” and Shane West’s face, but I liked it (if I watched it today, even divorced from the whole of Sparks’s canon, I would hate it, but that’s a separate issue). But as time went on and I watched a couple more of his movies and then heard about the others, it’s just … look. I know that we make stories to make people feel a certain way. We want to elicit an emotional response. And that’s a good thing, you know? And I know I rail about darkness and sadness a lot, but I’m not even saying that stories should only try to elicit good emotions. That feels shallow.

But with Nicholas Sparks and other tear-jerker-type stories (see: reasons I never got into Grey’s Anatomy, reasons I’m more likely to read straight-up darkfic than what people call “sads”), the emotional manipulation is incredibly blatant and formulaic and … I don’t know, is “cheap” the word I want? I don’t see the point in a story that says “Here’s a thing you love. Fate is going to take that thing you love from you. The main character is going to lift their chin like Scarlett O’Hara and say ‘tomorrow is another day!’“ I don’t feel like it’s something the creator is sharing with me, I feel like it’s something they’re trying to do to me, and I don’t take kindly to that.

2. White Cis Hets Touching Foreheads.

3. His whole brand is marketed to women, books and movies both, they’re chick flicks, date movies, stuff For the Women, but he sure is a dude. Not that men aren’t allowed to write romances, but it’s just that slimy feeling of “a wise man making money off all those silly weepy romantic women” rather than “a wise man showing that it’s okay for both women and men to cry over a love story where tragic things happen.” Like. Nora Roberts sure doesn’t have this kind of franchise. And I can’t say I enjoy reading Nora Roberts, but one could excise the sex from her books and make movies and market them to women, but somehow nobody got to be a romantic-book-adaptation juggernaut until Sparks. Partly because he’s a man and partly because

4. Happiness Isn’t Art. There seems to be this implication that because things end badly, because they’re sad, because they make you cry, it’s okay that they’re romantic. The sadness makes sure that they’re art. And fuck that, honestly? Tearjerkers are fine, whatever, they can (and should, I don’t want to stop people writing for the genres that appeal to them) exist in the world even if I don’t want to consume them, but nobody in this world gets to tell me that the unhappiness elevates them higher than the romcom. That it’s better than Nora Roberts not because he’s a man but because the sadness makes it somehow more worthy.

5. Look at that face. Tell me you don’t want to punch that smug face.

6. Sometimes you just read a book or watch a movie and know that the person behind the story is ideologically opposed to you in pretty much every possible way.

Just to sum up, I guess … I’m a person who loves reading and writing love stories. I always have been, since I was a little kid. If there’s tragedy and difficulty along the way, sure, I’m willing to go along with that, but when there’s someone who consistently says “no, this is only worthy if I take happiness away from you, because happiness isn’t art, because romance is only worth of attention if tragedy interrupts it,” then I get ready for a fight. And since he’s very much the trend leader there, I am pretty much ready to meet him in the pit at all times.

She doesn’t tell him about the pregnancy because she feels he’s too tired to deal with that and doesn’t want to be a burden…

She told the kids to not bother him much because she feels he’s too busy to even read them a book…

Her body language expresses a lot of insecurity as she grabs her arm and despite being happy about the marriage, she needed to know if he was genuinely happy about it too, if he really wanted this as much as she did, despite their future together being so uncertain…

In the moment she feels she’s about to die, her first thought is Kaneki’s happiness…

Touka always —unconsciously or not— places Kaneki’s feelings first even before herself. I honestly believe that’s a huge act of love, especially because she knows how reckless he can be by constantly thinking about other’s safety and never worrying about himself, and everyone always took advantage of that weakness of him to use him for their own purposes only. But she wants to make sure that he’s well, that he gets what he wants, what he needs… the fact that she really worries about his feelings is beautiful. There’s a lot of honesty in that kind of love…. 💦

so like does nobody realize how extremely heartbreaking it is that harry literally heard the last few moments of lily’s life when the dementors were around him?? that he literally hears his mother getting murdered?? and like what’s worse is that harry feels so guilty about fainting, he feels so alone and embarrassed and it actually makes me want to cry. people call harry whiny and dramatic but my heart honestly breaks for this boy, this poor boy who never even knew his parents, who never even heard his mother’s voice until he has to hear her screaming and pleading for harry’s life and i just….i’m really emotional

The Inner Dialogue of Someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder and is in a Relationship

First of all, I’d like to make it clear that my relationship is honestly quite amazing. We have a very honest, open, secure, accepting, understanding, and supportive relationship. But when you have BPD, your illness tells you things and makes you think things that are extremely hard to deal with, even in the best relationship.

What do you even see in me?
I’m filth. I’m trash. I am the emperor of garbage.
When are you going to realize I’m a horrible person?
Am I good enough for you?
Am I being too clingy, too needy, too emotional, too much? 
Am I being too distant, too detached, too little?
Will I be enough this time?
Are you going to abandon me? 
When are going to abandon me?
Are you lying to me?
Do you actually love me or are you just saying that?
Do I have too much baggage?
I’m such a burden to you.
You deserve so much better..
You’re going to leave me, everybody leaves
… Am I just a back up option? Something to use until something better comes along? 
… Why are you with me, I’m nothing..
Does my risky behaviour stress you out? Do I stress you out? Am I difficult?
… I can’t “handle” myself, how is anybody else supposed to?
I hate myself, how can anybody actually love me?
If I don’t love myself and they say you can’t love somebody else if you don’t love yourself does that mean I’m lying to myself? Oh god I’m such a piece of shit… 
Am I good enough?
Tell me I’m good enough… tell me it’s okay… tell me you love me
Should I tell you how I feel? No, no, no, you wouldn’t understand
I’m always so depressed and boring… are you bored with me?
You’ll get bored.
Until I do something impulsive or destructive.
Then I’ll stress you out and add drama to your life.
Omg I’m a horrible person, you deserve better
Nothing will ever help me, you don’t deserve this
Oh shit, I’m so annoying
How do you put up with me? 
Fuck I love you, so so so so much, but I’m terrified you’re going to hurt me or I’m going to be bad for you …


It doesn’t matter how many times he reassures me or tells me being mentally ill doesn’t make me a burden, my illness convinces me I am.. I practice skills and go to therapy and do my best every single day. Some people get into a relationship with someone with BPD or another mental illness and have this idea they can ‘fix’ them or it will magically ‘go away’, it won’t. It doesn’t mean their feelings for you are any less or that they want to be this way… the support is amazing, being loved is amazing, but it doesn’t cure illnesses.

Your patience and support and encouragement and reassurance is always appreciated, but don’t get into the mindset that you have to be our therapists. Be our partners. That’s all we want from you, a partner.

And if you’re the one with bpd, don’t think that these thoughts mean your love is any less valid. You are deserving and capable of giving and receiving love, despite what your illness tells you 💖💖💖

{PART 16} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU

Originally posted by jengkook

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Vampire!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Smut

Summary; You begin to regret revealing all the details about your painful, tragic past to Jungkook. Meanwhile, Jungkook, Taehyung and Jimin share their knowledge with each other in the hopes of figuring out what intentions lie behind Yoongi’s actions.

I update this series every Tuesday evening, 9pm-10pm (UK Time)

{Part 1} // {Part 15} {Part 16} {Part 17}

Keep reading

not sure if many of you have noticed but jackson tends to get waved off as a joke even when he is talking about something serious. after this scene where they all just waved off his “joke” u could see he became quieter and talked only when spoken to for most of it. not trying to reach but Jackson honestly seemed hurt by them and idc if y'all think jackson stans are being dramatic as per usual! or what not but honestly sometimes the members really doesn’t take him as seriously as they should. and ahgases are the same too… but even worse. some people truly just treats Jackson like a jester n act like his main role in got7 is to make jokes n that without his jokes he’s nothing. y'all act like he isn’t a human with emotions.. like ya he makes a whole lot of jokes but that doesn’t mean all his emotions are closed off??? can u honestly tell me in that video jackson didn’t look the least bit hurt and saddened by them…..he did try to kind of turn it into a joke after but u can’t be that dense ya feel? pls….. even he said that he wanted to be show his serious side so that he can be taken more seriously.

anonymous asked:

Is it true that Isayama said that Eren must follow Levi's shadow in order to grow/develop? In an interview?

Hello anon! Yup, this is true.

It happened on an interview about Levi, in the August 2014 FRaU magazine. I’m sure you guys have seen this cover around many times!:

This is the same magazine that gave us a lot of important info about Levi (he has insomnia and only sleeps 2-3 hours on his chair, he has good resistance to alcohol and doesn’t get drunk, he fears mold, he takes 3 minute showers, etc.) and about his relationship with other characters (this is the interview where he said Eren is the best at cleaning, too!). Honestly that magazine was so good, it even had character horoscopes, haha.


I am quoting you the translation for the part you asked for:

Isayama: I have also sensed Levi’s appeal, and he is a character that makes me happy whenever I get the chance to draw him. He truly plays a role that helps the main character(s) preserve stability. If Eren has to march forward in pursuit of Levi’s shadow…the entire series could also progress in a similar manner.

(Eren can become shaky whenever he is angry/emotional, but Levi wouldn’t budge in the least). Levi probably can’t express himself like this any longer… Convulsing means that your anger has reached some type of limit, but Levi has probably already evolved past that stage.
Levi is a character who existed since I was conceptualizing everything. His personality was settled upon way back then.

The source of this translation is this post by fuku-shuu. Since Isayama was a bit vague, she also clarified on this post what the meaning of his words could be:

1. How I’m interpreting this part from the Chinese is that Eren needs to continue chasing Levi’s shadow in order for the series (And himself) to evolve.

2. Yes, it’s definitely possible that Levi also used to have such emotions/react in such a way - but the nuance here is not that he simply “grew out of it” but has become rather desensitized. It’s meant to incite sympathy towards him, as far as I can tell from the language used.


I love this because it shows how important Eren and Levi’s relationship is for the story. I know that many times, when we get a lot of Eren and Levi official art, merchandise, etc., when they’re featured side by side in magazines, advertisements, and all that stuff, our first reaction is to think: “well this is because ereri is popular and they’re thinking on profit”. 

And yes, that might be correct, but it’s not the only reason. Their relationship is essential for the story. There’s always been paralels between them in the manga, which have been analyzed and discussed again and again, but this is great because this info is coming from Isayama himself, he’s saying it with his own words, and he’s showing us a little bit of his view on them.

He already knew when he was creating the concept of the story, that Levi was going to exist and was going to be a huge influence on the protagonist. And for the ones who read the manga, we have seen how Eren has evolved a lot already. I am really eager to see him after the timeskip!

I know many of you are sad and dissapointed because the lack of interaction between Eren and Levi lately. But Isayama’s story is huge, and has been expanded even more in the latest chapters. On top of that, this is a monthly manga, so things move really slow. But this here, is a real confirmation that Eren and Levi are very important to each other and to the whole story. This honestly makes me really happy and gives me hope that there still will be meaningful moments between them in the future.

taylor swift is a child. 

Look What You Made Me Do? Honey, how, did you forget you’re a whole adult and responsible for your own actions? No one? Can make you do? Anything? You got caught sis, you made yourself do that shit? You should’ve said from jump ‘yeah we talked but I’m not comfortable being referred to by derogatory terms such as ‘bitch’ INSTEAD you claimed to never heard it at all. AND IT HONESTLY WASN’T EVEN A BIG DEAL UNTIL YOU RESPONDED. cause we all already knew yo ass was lying like cmon.

Also can we talk about how that specific phrase is common in emotional manipulation/abuse as a way to shift blame onto the VICTIM and keep them under their abuser? GIRLFRIEND I know you’re oblivious half the time but you are literally exhibiting unhealthy levels of control i’m concerned. 

The 80s synth pop was cool but I just wasted 3:31 minutes of my life. And now I can’t remember why teenaged me ever liked her. don’t at me. don’t come in my inbox i’m done with this topic.

Today I finished reading World Ain’t Ready by idiopathicsmile and honestly I wasn’t ready for the ending and it reduced me to a puddle of teenage emotions and adoration for that amazing writing.

I thought drawing Enjolras from chapter 13 in glasses and pajama pants might make it better. It did help like 14.7%

4

By the way, how do you exactly put yourself in the shoes—and the head—of a character like “Lucifer”? Honestly, music has always helped me get inside the head of characters that I’m creating. I love making playlists that suggest mood, tone or even just certain emotions. It’s sort of like a musical mood board. Music takes you somewhere instantly, to a place that’s beyond words.

anonymous asked:

What were your impression of each of the exo members that you saw irl? Please please please tell in great detail. Just let me live my dream of seeing exo up close through you. T_T thankyou and sorry for being annoying. I just T_T

You’re not being annoying at all. I’m always happy to talk about EXO lol

Suho is GORGEOUS. And sooooo so so smol. Like I’m 5′2″ and I don’t think he’s much taller than me. His hair was perfect and beautiful. I was shocked bc he was walking by himself. Not a manager or anything. But he looked lost, like he was supposed to be with the others lol He was walking super fast.

Chen.. My friend actually pointed him out. & I was like “nah” but then I looked at his legs & was like “yep! that’s him!”. His legs are really skinnyyyy. He has the chillest, coolest walk & tbh it was very very attractive to me. He was also by himself & he seemed so relaxed. Just strolling down the street with his bag.

Chanyeol!! He is not as tall as I thought he would be!! I was really surprised But I heard his voice (while they were recording!!!) & it was the usual lovely deepness. Also his ears <3 

On the flip side, Baek is taller than I thought. And he seemed kind of nervous? We made eye contact for a quick second but he looked away so quickly. Also he and and Chanyeol walked past us THREE times. 

Sehun… I had my back to him every time he walked past so I didn’t look at him that much. But what I did see is that he has a nice walk. It’s such a confident walk. He’s also not as tall as I thought he’d be.

And Minseok. Kim Minseok. Don’t even get me started. It makes me emotional just thinking about him. He seemed so relaxed, chill, happy, calm, excited. You could tell that he was enjoying the street show sooo much. He was smiling so hard & was giving all his attention to the performers. Uggghhhh he is perfect. Idc if I sound biased, he’s PERFECT. He was so ridiculously cute and honestly he looked like a normal guy just watching a show. & that makes me love him even more

anonymous asked:

Honestly, this was probably my favorite DAPG vid in a while. Idk why, I just loved the RPG, the interactions, the music and game references, it was just really good

it was incredible, and i think it might be my favorite gaming video ever. i can’t get over how excited they both were about it and i loved how dan was trying to tease phil about his grammar or whatever but couldn’t stop himself from giving phil praise and compliments every minute because DAMN he deserves it??? i know next to nothing about gaming or how one would use whatever tool phil mentioned to make a game like this, sixteen years ago mind you, but fuck it’s clear that regardless of whatever help that technology gave him, he still had to do a shit ton of work to make this and think of the story and the characters and write all the dialogue and i’m just so IMPRESSED with him and his brain. it was so clear that dan was too, the whole entire time. and i love that dan’s support doesn’t just stop with comments like “i like this” or “i’m having a lot of fun” (which are great in themselves) but that he takes it even farther and tells phil that he (phil) could make his own game now and that he should even do all the drawings for it. like this video gave us a chance to watch dan being phil’s biggest creative supporter, and basically tell him that he, dan, has faith in phil’s ability to make or create just about anything and even though we knew that was the case, it was so overwhelmingly sweet to me to see it in action like that. i also love how phil was so excited to see that dan was impressed with the game? he looked pleasantly surprised and so happy every time dan told him he liked it and i wanted to cry. and i can’t get over the music choices and how dan identified and knew every single one after like .3 seconds and how each time a new song came on they’d turn to each other and smile as dan recognized it and i’m sure there’s just a depth of shared conversations and nostalgia there for them bc a lot of the songs are from classic games they both love and others are just ones that it seems like dan would know phil likes (like “smooth” by santana and bohemian rhapsody). it was so sweet to see not only dan being supportive and excited but also to see how much their interests and knowledge overlap, even to the point of them becoming self-aware about it and apologizing to us for the number of inside jokes and references they were making, and to the point of them noting that at 14 years old they would’ve still been friends and probably gotten along the way they do now. it’s wild to me, always, that they found each other and that they align on soooo many things, and it was making me so emotional to see that play out in this video. they are literally so perfectly suited to share a life together i don’t even understand… i will gladly watch several hours of dan fawning over phil’s mind and talent and creativity, of dan being so visibly PROUD of his partner, and of phil basking in the compliments. it’s the most heartwarming thing, and i just love this video SO much

Mind Trap Chapter 4: Seguro and Mixed Emotions

First off I’m sorry about the last chapter. Second you guys are the best. The first chapter has 201 notes last I checked. So thank you


Prev Chap: https://sailormew4.tumblr.com/post/166050863886/mind-trap-chapter-3-triste-hehe-hi-ready-for


Next Chap: https://sailormew4.tumblr.com/post/166086257881/mind-trap-chapter-5-miedo-holy-quiznak-guys-this


Chapter Summary: Paladins finally get some answers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


The Paladins got their Bayards ready to fight the large shadow creatures(?) coming to them.


Pidge tries to electrocute them or at the very least tie it up but it slips right through like a snake. She groans as she thrown to a cliff.


Allura does a similar tactic of holding them back from the team and tieing by they seem to feed off her nervousness.


Shiro tries to maneuver and hit them but they keep on dodging till he’s out of breath.


Hunk is blasting all around him but they surround him as he yells, “What are these things!?!”


Keith is about to attack till a beam of blue hits them. Everyone turns to where the shot came from to see…. Lance?


Lance yells from the rock, “Hello darkness, my old friend! Miss me?”


Keith is officially done with this mission. Plus, how is Lance changing clothes so quickly? First he was in a causal t-shirt, then somehow changed to his hoodie, and now he’s in his Paladin Armor.


The shadows take their attention off the Paladins as they go after him. Lance runs off the cliff as he swings off a planet tree and kicks the shadows in the face. Lance cheers, “Head shot! Boo ya!”


The shadows try to swing at Lance but they keep missing him as he ducks and dodges as if they are blind to him. Lance forms his rifle as he takes aim at the center of the shadow and hits it with perfect accuracy.


The shadows retreat as Lance looks at the team and gives them a wink. He turns to the direction where the shadows came from as he taunts, “Who’s the cool, ninja, sharpshooter now inner demons!”


Lance turns to them as he asks, “Come on, I was awesome. Or is my awesomeness so great that it made you speechless?”


The Paladins stare at him with wide eyes and gaping mouths as Lance chuckles with a glint in his eyes that the team knew was his flirting look.


He goes to Allura… and walks right past her to Keith as he closes his mouth and teases, “You, know Keith some might think that open mouth was an invitation for something?”


Keith blushes before shaking his head as annoyance settles in he yells, “What the quiznak were those things?! And why do you keep ditching us to switch clothes or whatever! First, you’re overwhelming happy you won’t even argue with me! Then, you’re depressed and apologising all the time! Now, you’re Mr Hotshot?! Make up your mind! WHO ARE YOU?!”


“I’m Lance,” answers Lance but you everyone’s surprise the two Lances(?) from earlier pop up from behind him with a bright smile and a sad frown.


The Paladins scream in shock as Pidge even climbs on Shiro in surprise as Hunk looks like he’s about to faint.


Allura blinks as she points to the Lance in the casual shirt as she identifies, “Happy.”


“Sad,” continues Shiro as he points to the Lance with that hoodie.


“Confident,” finishes Hunk looking at the one in Paladin Armor.


“You forgot Dark and Broody,” jokes Happy as he points to Keith who is still processing what is happening.


Pidge climbs off Shiro as she explains, “You were never our Lance. You’re just a part of him. His emotions. That’s why you’re so different.”


“Ding ding! Pidgey got it right!” cheers Happy as he smiles as he ruffles her hair.


“Wait, this can’t be his only emotions. Right?” asks Hunk curious as his own mind is hurting.


“No. We are a complicated person Hunk. The other emotions are-,” starts Confident before his lips close on their own.


Sad sees this as he continues sadly, “Sorry… Confident is a positive emotion he can’t give bad news… I can though… since the ‘bad thing’ came all the emotions are starting to… not work? They aren’t doing their jobs.”


Pidge thinks about it before she understands and explains, “That’s what meant Coran meant when he said it’s killing from the inside. It’s killing his emotions. A human without emotions is practically dead!”


The Paladins gasp in shock before going silent. Hunk breaks it by asking to the remaining emotions, “How can we stop it?”


Happy and Confident look at Sad who sighs mournfully as he answers, “Sorry, but you’re going to have to go through his entire mind.”


“Whoa! No way! That’s beyond invasion of privacy! We’re in his mind! We already saw way too much already!” argues Hunk not liking the idea as he makes stopping motions.


“We won’t mind, hehe mind,” giggles Happy. “Plus so much stuff happens in our noggin’ that he won’t even know. All gotta you do is keep it to yourself.”


“We won’t be mad, we can take it,” adds Confident with a smile.


“But, sorry, we can’t go with you if Lance loses anymore emotions especially Confident who’s already fighting inner demons. We’ll be gone for good,” finishes Sad. “But I honestly think he would be better without me….”


“But we believe in you! We’re with you in spirit!” encourages Happy ignoring Sad’s comment.


Keith sighs as he really hates this idea. Sure, his happy memories were nice to see, but if they have to go through those negative emotions like with Sad…. he’s almost certain he can’t handle that. Seeing Lance so… defeated and broken…. it was an image he wishes he could forget. “Fine. Where do we start?”


The Paladins look at him in shock as Confident says with a flirty wink, “Knew you didn’t want to leave my thoughts Samurai. Follow me.”


The Paladins do so as Allura looks to see Happy and Sad going the opposite direction as she asks, “Where are they going?”


“They’re going back to their domain. They only came cause you mentioned them,” answers Confident.


Keith looks back to hear Happy’s laughter drowning out Sad’s whines of discomfort. He really doesn’t want these part of Lance to go away… even it is painful to watch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


After walking a while Confident stops in front of the Blue Lion as he says, “Welcome to Casa de Lion. Just fly her into the next emotion and you start your work.”


“Wait, what are we supposed to do anyway?” asks Hunk a little concerned.


Confident smiles as he explains, “The other emotions are still here we can feel them slightly, but to, I guess you could revive, you need to get rid of the 'bad thing’ in their area. It’s too much for them.”


“What did Haggar even do? What’s this 'bad thing’?” asks Shiro as he needs to know what they are facing.


Confident thinks about his response as his lips finally let him speak as he answers, “Just stuff inner demons that are too scared to fight yours truly. It’s my job to fight them.”


They look in the distance before entering Blue to see a darkness overwhelming the mind as Keith looks at it and says confidently, “We’re going to save you Lance…. don’t worry.”

Why 1970s-1980s autistic girls went undiagnosed. (Opinion)

Sexism.


I’m going to expound on this, but sexism is at the heart of all of my ideas about why girls went undiagnosed in the earlier eras. I’m not only talking about sexism from other people, I mean the inherent sexism within societal structures and the girls internalized themselves.


Even now I struggle against my own internal mental sexism. But these attitudes were formed when I was a child. As a girl in my era, your concerns were not taken as seriously. This happens today as well. I read a study recently that said women who visit doctors, with the same symptoms as men, get taken seriously far less often. You can go Google it if you like, but it’s a thing that happens and there are multiple studies.


So when I had what we now know are sensory issues as a child, teen, and young adult, they merited an eyeroll and “Stop being so overdramatic!”. I can remember countless times I was told that things that bothered me only bothered me because I was overreacting, making a mountain out of a molehill, or “just being silly”. My experiences, as experienced by me, seemed less legitimate than my imagined experiences as believed by people like parents, teachers, and doctors. I internalized this somewhat. To the point that even now I have to fight it in my own head.


One of the best things about finding out about my autistic nature was being able to validate my own life experiences as experienced by me. Direct light really is horrible and I’m not bad for avoiding it. Wearing welder goggles to drive isn’t something I need to belittle myself for, and I should not let others tell me it’s stupid. Refusing to wear acrylic or polyester (even when gifted) isnt me being petty and rude. Giving back or refusing to eat a foodstuff I find horrid isn’t just me being an ass. Meltdowns aren’t something I’m doing *at* people cause I’m a jerk.


I realize that here on Tumblr, all these statements are like “duh. Of course”. But I want you to understand that almost every childhood experience I had with my issues made me feel like I was a petty, melodramatic, acting-out unnecessarily ass.


So why is this about sexism?


Because no man I’ve ever talked to has faced the same “overreacting drama queen” mindset, and many women have. Many men find it bizarre and absurd, much like how a white dude who has never been pulled over is shocked by how many times Trevor Noah of The Daily Show has been (many).


The experiences of women of my era were diminished. The idea that we are over-emotional by nature, tainted people’s perceptions of those of us with problems, even medical ones.


There is no reason, zero, to assume men are more inherently honest about their pain, emotions, and experiences, yet to trained medical professionals, they are assumed to be so. They are treated with more respect. This was even more true in the 1970s and 1980s than it is now.


Personal anecdote-


I have always hated melons. They have a weird aftertaste that, honestly tastes like something in vomit to me (also like cucumbers, which also make me vomit). Whenever they’re mixed with other fruits, they taint them with that melony taste. Neither my parents nor my grandparents (when they were alive) ever remembered or respected this preference. I would get eye rolls, and it would end up on my plate if I wasn’t insistent. Every year, every summer, I was asked to eat some, with people genuinely treating me as if I did not have enough self-knowledge to know I really *hated* it. Eye rolls, depreciating remarks (“You’re being ridiculous” “Don’t be so rude, just try some”) were the standard. My Gra, sweetheart though she is and quite elderly now, offered me some this year. The improvement now is that I don’t get teased about it anymore.


If my dad said he didn’t like something, it did not end up on his plate. If my husband said he didn’t like something, his parents knew and didn’t try to serve it to him. I have never been treated with the same amount of respect from the older generations as they treat the men.


I grew up in the southern, somewhat Appalachian US, and I don’t know if it’s more common there or not. I’d love to hear about other older autistic women’s experiences.


While my male peers had sensory issues, I was an overreacting female. While my male peers had social and linguistic difficulties, I was just a weird girl who nobody liked. While my male peers had “Special Interests”, I was just strangely obsessed with stuff sometimes. Every aspect of my autistic nature was belittled and minimized so I felt like a stupid woman with little self control.


I’m only self diagnosed, so my own doubts about my experience and knowledge plague me and cause me difficulties. I still have a voice in my own head saying “Maybe you’re just being overdramatic.”. My own mental voices belittle and diminish me, an inheritance from my childhood I am trying to fight. But every time I read an autistic Tumblr post or blog and think “Oh my gosh, that’s me!” It reinforces that my experiences are valid, that this diagnosis creates a framework where in my entire life makes sense. I am not stupid. I am not bad. I am autistic, and that label helps me understand myself and start to love and forgive myself and others.


Autistic Pride starts here, and it’s a route to self respect.

anonymous asked:

Hello ^-^ May I request some angst imagines for Soldier, McCree, and Genji where they call on holovid to their S/O who is currently away on a mission because they miss them. They talk for a minute (cue mushy talk) and then their S/O gets shot by an enemy? Whether they live or die is up to you. ouo

A/N: Decided to only do Genji and Soldier since they were a little long, and I figured I could make things a little more angsty if I threw in a couple of everyone’s favorite Talon members. These are kind of sad, but hey, isn’t that the point of writing angst? Besides, there’s some weird sense of pride when you write something like this. There’s some blood mentions in the story, though I try not to go into gruesome detail.

Soldier 76:

76 let out a long groan as he slumped further into his chair. The amount of intelligence that Overwatch brought in was staggering, and he had foolishly volunteered to help sort through it. Even when he was Strike-Commander, he never much cared for paperwork, it was an unfortunate part of the job. He could feel his eyes glazing over as he stared at the pile of papers that covered his desk. He’d earned a quick break, if only to refresh his mind before jumping back into his work. The metallic visor detached with a satisfying click, 76 cracked a small smile as the warm air of his office caressed his skin.

The visor was certainly a useful tool, and did wonders for hiding who he once was from prying eyes, but it wasn’t designed with comfort in mind. 76 reached into his pocket, withdrawing a small rectangular device. The screen flashed to life with a touch of his finger, the simplistic UI leaving each icon plainly visible. His hand lingered above the icon for a video call, inwardly debating on whether or not to get in touch. You’d been sent on a mission, and personal calls back to base weren’t exactly frequent when in combat. There was the odd call between active duty, but the responsibilities one had in the field took priority over phoning home.

76 shook his head, knowing that he shouldn’t even consider calling, distractions could be fatal in this line of work. Sighing gently, he decided against his better instincts, tapping the icon to initiate a video call. The device rang for several seconds, before the screen flashed again, your face appearing before him.

“Hey you. Miss me already?” You joked, smiling warmly at the grizzled man on the other side of the screen. A splash of redness tinted 76′s cheeks, though an untrained eye would have difficulty spotting it.

“Just checking in, making sure everything’s going smoothly.” He spoke stoically, his gruff tone as even as ever.

“Things are looking good, I’d say we’ll be able to wrap up within a few days tops. Talon’s been unusually quiet, not that I’m complaining.” You relaxed your posture, slumping against a nearby wall.

“Glad to hear it. I take it that intel was off?”

“Seems that way. I’m honestly rather happy that we didn’t run into him.”

“Me too, but don’t let your guard down.” You smiled at each other. 76 was never terribly emotional, but he let you know that he cared in his own way. Subtle shifts in his tone or posture, the occasional praise, even a kiss now and again.

“I never do. When I get back, what do you say we-” A rattle from down the hall drew your attention away from your partner. “Hold on a second.” 76 nodded, his face wearing its usual stern expression. You disappeared from the device’s view, a roughly textured wall the only image 76 could see. A yelp peaked his attention, the screen still showing the wall you once laid against.

“Y/N? Are you okay? Answer me!” He could feel the fear rising in his throat as he awaited a reply. The silence was deafening, until the device was raised into the air by an unseen hand. The screen shifted from the wall, to focusing on your battered body held by a single clawed gauntlet.

“Hello Jack…” The anguished voice was all too familiar to 76, the venom lacing his old friend’s words was palpable, even through the call. “I see you’ve taken interest in someone a little… younger…” 76 winced as he watched Reaper’s hand tighten further around your throat, small traces of blood leaking over the ends of his claws.

“Let them go Reyes!” 76 roared, nearly snapping the device between his hands. Reaper’s grip continued to grow tighter, the blood covering his claws beginning to drip towards the ground. “Let them go goddammit!”

“I told you, I will get my revenge.” The expressionless mask stared into his very soul, thin black mist flowing from the openings. He could feel tears begin to roll down his cheeks as he watched you struggle, the iron grip of the reaper was inescapable.

“Jack… I love you…” You coughed out between ragged breaths, your throat felt as though it was going to burst into flames. The pressure Reaper exerted was unimaginable, his force overwhelming your senses.

“I love you so much…” He croaked. “I’m so sorry…”

“How touching.” Reaper sneered, tightening his grip around your neck, snapping it as though it were a twig. It took every ounce of self control 76 had to not cry out in anguish, he could at the very least deny Reaper the satisfaction of watching him break. Reaper discarded your body, placing the device on the ground to leave your corpse in perfect view of the camera. “I’ll be seeing you soon, Jack.”

“I’m so sorry…” He whimpered, his hands trailing the screen as he stared at your remains. His heart ached as he sobbed uncontrollably, apologizing over and over again. “I’m so sorry…”

Genji:

Genji stretched his arms high into the air as he pushed himself to his feet. Meditation certainly was relaxing, but his joints always felt a little stiff after an extended session. Normally he’d be able to fill some time in the day training with you, or at least relaxing near you. Since you were away on a mission, his day was rather open unless he wanted to spend every waking hour working on his form. A metallic sigh escaped his helmet, Genji found himself rather bored when he wasn’t able to spend time with you. Sure, Zenyatta was more than happy to spend time alongside his pupil, but he was hardly the life of the party. Anything outside of meditation or inward reflection was an alien concept to the enlightened Omnic.

If he was going to relax, he was at least going to do it somewhere with a view. Genji deftly scaled the walls of Watchpoint Gibraltar, making his way to the highest point of the Overwatch base. A small rooftop presented an exceptional view of the bay below, and interruptions this far off the beaten path were extremely rare. Genji had discovered the space during his original tenure with Overwatch before its collapse. Having somewhere to be alone was comforting when he was still adjusting to his cybernetic body. Though once he joined the reformed Overwatch and met you, the rooftop took on a different function.

Instead of somewhere Genji could retreat from the world, it became a space where he could share some quality time with you. A pair of bean bag chairs had been dragged up here by the youngest Shimada, and you were rather insistent that a small rug be placed between them. The metallic rooftop was far from inviting before you each cleaned it up a little, it was almost cozy now. Finding joy in the simpler things was something Genji used to be incapable of doing, but it was almost second nature when he was with you. Being able to take in such a gorgeous view alongside an equally as gorgeous partner was something he wouldn’t trade for the world.

Genji smiled as he settled into the green chair, withdrawing a communications device from his waist. You were away on a mission, sure, but you each tried to make time to talk to one another when you were apart. The device sprung to life as his fingers deftly tapped away at it, quickly opening a video call to your device. It rang for an instant, before your face appeared on the screen.

“I was just about to call you.” You laughed, smiling warmly at Genji.

“Sorry, I’m just a little too fast for you.” Genji chuckled, opening his helmet to reveal his rugged face. Scars from his mortal injuries at his brother’s hands lined his face, though you were adamant that they made him look sexy. “I thought you might miss this view.” Genji spun the device so that the camera faced the shining bay, the waves gently crashing against the rocks below.

“That is a nice view, but I think I prefer the one of you even more.” You playfully flirted, earning a smirk from Genji as he flipped the device back towards himself.

“I can’t blame you, green definitely looks good on me.” He joked, laughing alongside you. “I trust that everything is going smoothly?”

“Nothing I can’t handle, I learned from the best, after all.”

“That you did, but you’re not a cyborg ninja.”

“I like to think I’m pretty close.”

“I can agree with that.” You both laughed again, the relaxing dynamic between the two of you always did wonders when one of you was out in the field. It was hard to be stressed out about a mission when you were joking around together.

“Oh! That reminds me, I was-” A gunshot cut off your speech, a hole now present in your forehead. Genji felt his blood run cold as he watched you sit there wordlessly, your posture slumping backwards slowly, bracing itself against the wall. He was speechless as your eyes stared blankly into space, unblinking as blood began to trickle from the wound in your forehead. Genji stared in disbelief at what he had just witnessed, his love so callously taken from him, so suddenly ripped away. He didn’t know if he’d even processed the fact that you had died, or if he was simply too blinded by rage to feel anything.

The clack of high heels against tile were picked up by the microphone, Genji immediately recognized the sound. A blue arm reached down, pushing your body out of view, a large splatter of blood left on the wall where you once sat.

Adieu.” A thick French accent spoke, seeming to relish in the kill. “Life is so fleeting, isn’t it, Mr. Shimada?” The device was picked up by your assassin, the smooth face of Widowmaker appearing on the screen. “You should’ve joined us when you had the chance, a pity they had to be dragged into this.”

“I am going to kill you.” Genji coldly spoke, his eyes piercing through the device. The rage within him was almost uncontrollable, needing every piece of Zenyatta’s advice to stop himself from tearing the device in two.

“I am terrified, truly.” Widowmaker scoffed, discarding the device to the ground, the sound of her heels fading away. Genji shook as he stared at the screen, hurling it in the bay below. With or without Overwatch’s help, he was going to make sure Widowmaker’s last moments were spent in agonizing pain. He would be sure to recover your body, but mourning would have to wait until he avenged you.