honest abe's

If anyone has a problem with chanyeol or any member for that matter having a tummy and being healthy isn't a real fan

If you were a real fan you would be happy for them! Having a tummy means he’s eating lots and that’s good! He is in no way overweight so people better stop fat shaming him

THE SIGNS AS ARCHETYPES
  • Aries: The warrior, the commander, the general, the fighter, the dragon-slayer, the challenger, the individualist, the child, the fighter, the thrill-seeker, the reckless, the impatient, the first, the pioneer, the bold, the brave, the fearless, the voyager, the entrepreneur, the stunt person, the dare devil, the competitor, the experimentalist.
  • Taurus: The empress, the earth mother, the preservationist, the hedonist, the sensualist, the materialist, the greedy, the grounded one, the realist, the good samaritan, the solid citizen, the bon vivant, the Honest Abe, the confidant, the protector, the adherent, the thoughtful one, the bully, the gentle giant, the dependable one, the musician, the peaceful one, the epicurean.
  • Gemini: The jester, the fool, the student, the thief, the comedian, the light-hearted, the one with the Peter Pan complex, the playful one, the one who never takes anything seriously, the imp, the trickster, the messenger, the gossip, the herald, the journalist, the practical joker, the sarcastic one, the class clown, the communicator, the talk-show host, the doppelganger.
  • Cancer: The girl/boy-next-door, the protective one, the helper, the giver, the intuitive, the witch, the wizard, the nurturer, the maternal figure, the caretaker, the defender, the fairy godmother, the kind one, the supportive one, the counselor, the angel, the giver, the enchantress, the siren, the mother, the crone, Mother Nature, the loyalist, the companion.
  • Leo: The hero, the noble, the generous, the ace, the chosen one, the hooker with a heart of gold, the dramatist, the performer, the creator, the star, the show-stopper, the narcissist, the praise-seeker, the braggart, the champion, the diva, the king and queen, the guiding light, the actor/actress, the headliner, the entertainer.
  • Virgo: The detective, the scholar, the observer, the thinker, the inquisitive, the critic, the intellectual, the bookworm, the author, the contemplative, the investigator, the perfectionist, the expert, the scientist, the research, the planner, the adviser, the mastermind, the scribe, the analyst, the nurse, the medicine man, the selfless.
  • Libra: The sweetheart, the darling, the charmer, the idealist, the romantic, the flirt, the sensualist, the enthusiast, the partner, the diplomat, the schmoozer, the pretty woman, prince charming, the star-crossed lover, the femme fatale, the flirt, the people-pleaser, the judge, the mediator, the peacemaker, the debater, the advocate, the just ruler, the lawful good.
  • Scorpio: The magician, the spy, the vampire, the bad boy/girl, the shaman, the healer, the transformer, the psychologist, the criminal, the obsessive, the passionate, the mysterious, the broody one, the anti hero, the reluctant monster, the seducer, the temptress, the survivor, the one with a tragic backstory, the manipulator, the alchemist.
  • Sagittarius: The sage, the philosopher, the academic, the teacher, the professor, the explorer, the adventurer, the preacher, the mentor and guide, the seeker, the wanderer, the traveler, the untameable, the happy-go-lucky character, the globetrotter, the fortune-hunter, the gambler.
  • Capricorn: The good kid, the role model, the CEO, the mob boss, the aristocrat, the manager, the captain, the responsible one, the rags-to-riches story, the determined, the achiever, the successor, the pragmatist, Father Time, the Grim Reaper, the authority figure, the emperor, the guardian, the laborer, the master.
  • Aquarius: The liberator, the outlaw, the maniac, the alien, the visionary, the catalyst, the inventor, the genius, the innovator, the eccentric, the pirate, the true believer, the creative, the wild man, the misfit, the lovable rogue, the rebellious spirit, the rule-breaker, the devil's advocate, the mad scientist.
  • Pisces: The mystic, the wise elder, the psychic, the oracle, the blind seer, the martyr, the dreamer, the saint, the sinner, the savior, the sufferer, the empath, the knight in shining armor, the damsel in distress, the escapist, the innocent, the shape-shifter, the starving artist, the storyteller, the spiritualist, the old soul, the last.

Ever since I did my post about how Thomas Jefferson would go to hell, people have been like “can you do Andrew Jackson too” to which my answer is a resounding HELL NOPE. That dude will LITERALLY MURDER ME and the fact that he’s dead WILL NOT DO A THING TO STOP HIM BECAUSE HELL CANNOT HOLD HIM. Like, most U.S. Presidents are murderers by proxy, but this dude was a LITERAL SERIAL KILLER WHO LIKED TO GET HIS HANDS DIRTY. He is responsible for the only time in American History that the president’s bodyguards had to save the ASSASSIN’S LIFE from the PRESIDENT. You know how we called Nixon “Tricky Dick” because he was a liar and we called George W. Bush “Dubya” after his middle initial and we called Abraham Lincoln “Honest Abe” because he was a pretty above-the-board type of guy? They called Andrew Jackson “Old Hickory” because he liked to BEAT PEOPLE ABOUT THE FACE AND BODY WITH HIS CANE. Like he was absolutely a genocidal maniac who apparently only held the office of President because everyone was too afraid to ask him to leave but now that I’ve said that, I want you all to know that if I’m found beaten to death with a blunt object, I can save the police the trouble of investigating: It was former U.S. President Andrew Jackson come back from the dead for revenge. 

4cc 2017

Restlessly waiting for vids of the free skate at Four Continents, so… er, I’m just going to dump a bunch of things on the short programs.

Lol, I should be doing my paper what is this

Yuzuru Hanyu

I don’t really know what’s up, but he’s only so-so in the SP. Of course, I only say this because we know how great he is and this is really “so-so” by Yuzuru Hanyu standards. HE WAS SO GREAT AT THE GRAND PRIX OKAY, so people’s expectations are higher. The most glaring mistake was his failed 4S; my heart kind of broke a little then. Overall, I thought his energy during the SP was kind of low. BUT! The very best thing about Hanyu is that even when he is not on top of his game, he still lands on his feet. Even when the 4S turned into a double, he was able to do the combination. That was awesome. He will always be awesome even on his worst days.

Another thing I love about Hanyu is that he knows how well (or not well) he performs. You can see it on his face he was not happy with that SP. Lol, and his face when he saw his score! He is such a sweetheart. Yeah, the judges love him okay, this isn’t even the first time he got a higher than expected score. Everyone is biased towards Hanyu. We just want to see him keep skating. ♥

Shoma Uno

MY SON YOU JUST KEEP GETTING BETTER AND BETTER. Yay yay yay, a score at the 100’s! I was so happy AND HE OUTSCORED YUZURU HANYU. I swear to God, I was following the scores on Twitter because I was out on a Friday night while the short programs were on-going, but I didn’t care, I didn’t care that I was like three blocks away from the office and people I work with could see me, I literally SCREECHED when someone tweeted that Shoma Uno outscored Hanyu.

I have no idea who I am rooting for anymore. Why am I even so happy about this when I was just mourning Hanyu’s jump. I think I just root for everyone, lol. ♥

Also, I would just like to say that Shoma doesn’t always have the best music. Sometimes his choices baffle me. I did like this one, though. He just makes me really happy, and he is always so cute out there like a small ball of… cuteness on the ice. (Nope, I am not a skating critic by any stretch. I’m just a humble spectator who likes cute things.)

Nathan Chen

Okay, you know what, congratulations, USA. I actually am not rooting for anyone outside of my country… and okay, Japan (because my God, Hanyu is a beast at this sport), but Chen got me at that 4Lz. I can’t. The quads he’s throwing out and the number of them he has under his belt… and just! Lutzes are my favorite thing to watch okay, this is so unfair! *ugly crying*

Man, I am so reluctantly rooting for him now. He deserved his place at 1st. Good job, Nathan Chen. *happy clapping*

Phichit Michael Christian Martinez

My boy wasn’t able to do the 4L he was aiming for, but he did land all his jumps, so I am really, really proud of him! To be honest, we are really, really behind in the whole skating game. MC still does not have any quads (while his peers are throwing them out like vomit like wtf) in this generation where jumps determine the champs. Our boy is also at that age when his body seems to be getting the better of him; I think he will grow up bigger than what is ideal of a competitive skater. This means he will have to keep working really, really hard. Still, MC is our first and still only world-class figure skater in… ASEAN? So I just want to see him succeed in this so much.

And whatever, we may be behind, but MC still has the BEST BIELLMANN OKAY FIGHT ME

Lol, bonus trivia about our Phichit: actually, here in the Philippines, figure skating is not that big. Any sport outside of basketball (and maybe volleyball because of the university rivalries), really, is not that popular. When you mention MC’s name, most people go, “OMG THAT BOY HAS ABS NOW!” Honest to God, I just had this conversation at the office pantry yesterday:

Me: Do you know our skater?
Colleague: Michael Martinez? He has a great bod now! I saw it on Instagram.
Me: Yeah, I’m really proud of him. I think it’s because–
Colleague: –he has a girlfriend now?
Me: …no. No. I was going to say it’s because jumps take a lot out of an athlete and they have to be really strong for it, but nevermind, because it just sounds lame after what you just said, you gossip hag.

Yep. Yes, that is pretty much what most people think about and notice. (Also, yes. Social media and IG. Everyone here is Phichit.) People only care whenever he wins because we get to see him on the news. Figure skating is not popular at all, and actually if you go to our ice rinks at the mall you’ll find that 70% of the skaters are flailing and falling on their asses. Lol, this is so not our sport.

Still, I love this kid for the work that he does. I’m really proud of him. I noticed his body changed significantly since 2014; that must have been tough. He’s taller now and bulkier, and while it’s a sign of his hard work (and wins him more fans lol I laugh about this so much because I’m gay and I can’t ride that bandwagon), it must also be even more difficult now to get those quads. His lack of quads is really hurting his scores. I’m glad he has not lost his flexibility, which is what people notice most about him. I. Just. Want. To. See. Him. Succeed. At. This. God damn. Keep working hard, MC! You’ve got this! ♥

Doppelgangers Tales

Doppelgangers (German for “double-walker”) are paranormal duplicates of a real person

Emilie Sagee never saw her doppelganger. Everyone else did, though. 

Sagee worked at the Baron von Güldenstubbe a girls school in Paris in 1845. She was a extraordinary good teacher well liked by student and teachers alike. So it made it extremely odd that in the last 16 years she had moved 19 times. But the school would discover soon enough why.

Unknown be known to Emilie but seens by everyone else she had her doppelganger hanging around her. Her ghostly sister was first spotted in a class by 13 of her students, standing right by Emilie mirroring her movements. However, she did become  groggy and weak during the times the doppelganger manifested, and the dopelganger was often seen doing things Sagee later said she had been thinking about at the moment, suggesting that she may have had some subliminal control over it. Soon, the doppelganger ventured beyond Sagee’s immediate vicinity. At first, it appeared to a classroom full of students, sitting calmly in the teacher’s chair while Sagee herself was outside, working in the garden. The few people who dared to approach the doppelganger found they could pass through it, yet it had a texture that reminded them of thick fabric.Time went by and the apparition became a permanent fixture of the school’s life, freaking people out on a regular basis. The girls’ concerned parents started removing their children from the school. Although Sagee was a model employee on all non-paranormal accounts, the headmistress had no option but to fire her and her ghostly double.

Keep reading

Me, whispering to myself last night as I worked on Inferno:

…I heard Katsuki Yuuri’s shredded, that he has an eight-pack…

20 Question Tag

Rules: Answer 20 questions and tag 10 followers

Name:  Michelle 
Nickname: Ellie
Zodiac Sign: Scorpio
Height: 5′4″
Orientation: Straight-ish?
Nationality:  US American
Favorite Fruit: Grapes. green Grapes.
Favorite Season: Fall
Favorite Book: How dare you make me choose!
Favorite Flower: Sunflowers
Favorite Scent: laundry detergent, an extinguished match, coffee
Favorite Color: Red, blue, and purple
Favorite Animal: Elephants
Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: Hot chocolate
Cat or Dog: Both
Favorite fictional character: Remus Lupin
Dream Trip: Italy-Prague trip would be wonderful. 
Number of Followers: Over 200 last time I checked

Tagged: @calaerildancer @briefpaperexpert @gwinryelle

CottonCatKing’s Master Post Against Yankee Lies

1) The War Between the States wasn’t over slavery, rather the states’ ability to secede from the Union. The Southern States did secede in major part due to fears over the future of slavery and being in a perpetual political minority if slavery was not allowed to expand westward and thus keep the balance of free vs slave states in the Senate. 4 states seceded after Lincoln called up volunteers to invade the South, so their reasoning was more in the fact of not wanting to invade fellow slave states rather than slavery by itself

2) Prior to hostilities, the Corwin Amendment was proposed in order to placate the South into remaining in the Union. “ No amendment shall be made to the Constitution which will authorize or give to Congress the power to abolish or interfere, within any State, with the domestic institutions thereof, including that of persons held to labor or service by the laws of said State”. This in effect would have made slavery legal forever, or rather near impossible to make illegal on the Federal level. It was endorsed by both  Buchanan and Lincoln prior to Fort Sumter. 

3) The famous quote about the Confederate Flag, “As a people we are fighting to maintain the Heaven-ordained supremacy of the white man over the inferior or colored race; a white flag would thus be emblematical of our cause.”, is not about this

but the 2nd national flag

which was used from 1862 to 1865 before being replaced by this

where the red stripe was added to make sure it would not be mistaken for the flag of surrender.

4) “The South would never give up slavery” is demonstratively false. In late 1864, President Davis, after initially rejecting Duncan Kenner’s, a representative from Louisiana and one of the largest single slave owners  in the CSA, plan to trade the abolition of slavery for international recognition, finally agreed to send Kenner to France to talk to Napoleon III and later to the Prime Minister of the UK. It ultimately failed, and Lee surrendered shortly afterwards, but all the same the President and his cabinet placed independence over slavery at the end.

5) “Lincoln the Emancipator” I’ll let Honest Abe speak for himself:
“ My paramount object in this struggle is to save the Union, and is not either to save or to destroy slavery. If I could save the Union without freeing any slave I would do it, and if I could save it by freeing all the slaves I would do it; and if I could save it by freeing some and leaving others alone I would also do that. What I do about slavery, and the colored race, I do because I believe it helps to save the Union; and what I forbear, I forbear because I do not believe it would help to save the Union. “
“ I have no purpose to introduce political and social equality between the white and black races. There is physical difference between the two which, in my judgment, will probably forever forbid their living together upon the footing of perfect equality, and inasmuch as it becomes a necessity that there must be a difference, I, as well as Judge Douglas, am in favor of the race to which I belong having the superior position. “

5a) To add to this, the Emancipation Proclamation did not free any slaves, as the only areas it was in effect was not under Federal control, and he 4 border states that did not secede were not included in the Proclamation. This was due to the fact that Lincoln did not want to swing those states over to the CSA as Kentucky was vital to the war effort of the North so that the Ohio River remained in Northern hands. In an ironic twist, the former CSA states had their slaves freed before the border states did, as they were under military jurisdiction/ martial law.


This is by no means exhaustive, and will be added to as I get time/ information. If you have anything to add, or I forgot something, let me know. I’m making this because I see a lot of disinfo about the WBTS and the CSA, which I cannot abide. Deo Vindice

💗 Powerpuff Girls S1 Sentence Starters – Part 2 of 2  💗

  • My doctor told me to cut down on justice.
  • We’ve…just grown apart, you see, and…well, there’s somebody else, I’m sorry, we can still be friends, goodbye.
  • We have to expose him for the phony that he is. But how?
  • I set up all of those other disasters so I could go in, save everyone, and get all the fame and glory.
  • You were perfect. No one suspected we set the whole thing up.
  • He’s with me, but not by choice! I took him and he didn’t like it!
  • Do you really think I would harm my own father?
  • Evil geniuses are made, not born.
  • I was completely overshadowed by your tremendous physical powers!
  • I don’t believe it! We had our very own pet monkey?
  • Now I’m a vengeful, mad genius bent on destroying mankind…with SUPERPOWERS!
  • Has this sibling rivalry come to an end?
  • Not with mechanical machine will I destroy this planet, but with my own bare hands!
  • I’ve dedicated my life to destroying what I had a hand in creating.
  • I like to eat gooey paste! ‘Cause I’m stupid!
  • You know better than that! Now apologize right this instant!
  • It’s an imitatable act. If the other kids were to see you doing it, they might want to do it too.
  • Not so fast, paste eater!
  • This oatmeal’s too hot!
  • I can’t make the ice come out.
  • Try not to make your sisters too jealous.
  • How come your sisters are so mean?
  • Way to go, ice princess.
  • Buzz! I’m gonna get you!
  • You’re not ready for the higher levels yet. Don’t worry, cheer up. Someday you will be.
  • Everyone knows you’re the scarediest.
  • I’ll show them. I’ll prove that I can be HARDCORE!
  • Well, I may be able to talk, but I sure as heck can’t drive.
  • AND I’M NOT A BABY!
  • Take this! And that! And this! And this! And that!
  • You can start by signing some very important documents on your desk.
  • Where am I? Why can’t I see? Wait! And why can’t I move my arms and legs?
  • I blindfolded and tied you up in order to keep the whereabouts of my secret lair a secret!
  • I was drawing a pretty picture of a red daisy, but then [name] came along and said that the red daisy was biogenetically impossible!
  • I knew there was trouble, and I had to act fast.
  • Why were you laughing so much? My life was at stake!
  • Boy, was he mad. There was steam coming out of his ears!
  • You don’t even know how to tell a good bedtime story!
  • That’s all okey-dokey, peachy keen, fine and dandy, but you never explained what was so gosh darn funny!
  • We’re not keeping that stinky fleabag because I’m gonna end up feeding it, and cleaning it, and loving it.
  • Well, there was this bad man, and he had this raygun.
  • If we didn’t have to sit through your ridiculous ramblings, we’d be halfway to solving this!
  • I dreamed I was hypnotized by a cat, we stole a jewel, and I jumped off a building! Pretty crazy, huh?
  • If George Washington used snails instead of greyhounds to pull his sled, there’d be no trees for Honest Abe to shove from the highest mountain.
  • I love to kiss all of those adorable babies!
  • If I have to milk another goat, I’m gonna be sick!
  • I must remember to destroy those kids after my breakfast has been eaten.
  • Can you please direct me to the location of where I may locate some eggs? For I would like to purchase them, so that they can travel home with me and I can eat them today.
  • I must attend to the dishes that I have soiled with the food that I have eaten.
  • I think our ball crashed through your window. Can we have it back?
  • I must reiterate: no touching of anything!
  • Listen to my singing, it could last for quite a while!
  • WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE COLOR?!
  • What do you mean, whatever?! We can’t live in a world without color! Mother Nature has big, big plans with color, and it just can’t be taken away!
  • You can’t park next to a fire hydrant!
  • You like things to be black and white, huh? Well, how would you like to be black and blue?
  • You can’t hurt me with the things that you do. I’ll pick up dandelions and I’ll give them to you.
  • Who do you think you are anyway, pops?
  • You don’t want to kick MY butt. My butt is as rotten as yours. What you want are butts settled on the throne of justice!
  • I think they’re asking for a hiney-whooping!
  • It takes more than a couple of cheap shots to make us cry.
  • Furthermore, every Wednesday will be Pretzel Day.
  • Good thing we had those burritos for lunch.
  • You’ve just been attacking the problem from the wrong angle.
  • Promise me you’ll use it. Promise?
  • Now it’s time for some super rest and relaxation.
  • It’s root beer time!
  • Can’t you come back later? It’s Saturday!
  • Back, you bad, old, giant fish balloon!
  • Well, um…eh…gotta go!
The Hateful 8 review that I promise was not intended to be some sort of history lesson

Quentin Tarantino’s script for The Hateful Eight notes an undetermined time period after the Civil War. 6 years, 8 years, or 12 years after the unconditional surrender of the Confederates to the Union Army. This is significant in the sense of America in this film is still being in the shadow of the civil war with Reconstruction, with Radical Republicans who wanted the South punished or versus those who wanted the South to get much more lenient treatment, as the Union was ultimately preserved, and a preserved Union needs some kind of ‘fairness’ for the defeated Southerners and Confederates. This was a clear tension in the country, as our characters in The Hateful Eight directly involved in the war have no feelings of togetherness or camaraderie, even if they were on the same side in the fight. But at the same time, this country that was quickly expanding out into territories that went far off the Mason-Dixon line, beyond the borders and alliances forged of North and South during this horrific war. Which brings us to Wyoming, the setting of this film. It didn’t become an official state in the United States until 1890, years after the Civil War and even years after the unclear time frame that Quentin Tarantino throws out there. It leaves the feeling of wide-openness and possibility in a place and space like that that seems so distant from that time and place in history. But there leaves a possibility for evil to creep in. The Hateful Eight is not just about the tensions of North and South but in the aftermath of that war, a war that involved so much bloodshed, sacrifice, alliances forged, grudges held, and certain degrees of betrayal, there may be something worse around the corner. After two consecutive films of alternative history used in the form of revenge by minority characters who were harmed and personally effected by the historical atrocities that Tarantino interrogates in both language and action, we get a film where it ends on one of the darkest notes in his whole filmography. The Hateful Eight is minor Tarantino for me, this is not to undersell its quality that is still quite good, but it seems reeled in, and in such a way that is purposeful. The flourishes in language and dialogue are mostly found in relation to the ruses and lies of these characters while the splattering gore in the violent acts committed in the film clearly take from horror, Italian horror and also the major horror touchstones in America with The Thing and The Exorcist, underlying the grotesquerie and the spectre of the evilness these certain characters confront if not embody themselves.

There are four characters in The Hateful Eight that directly share a history in the Civil War, a split of two on each side in the Union and Confederacy, North and South. For the North there is the lawman John Ruth, as played by Kurt Russell, who we can describe as both the stand-in for the trying to be upstanding white liberal who while trying to maintain the carry out of law and order in the still underdeveloped West is showing cracks. Russell’s performance plays on John Wayne, something he is certainly not unfamiliar with, but particularly in the manor of certain John Wayne performances fighting each other out (certain John Wayne performances that immediately sprung to mind was his roles in Fort Apache and She Wore a Yellow Ribbon, particularly when Russell puts on his glasses to get misty-eyed reading Major Warren’s Lincoln Letter). Tarantino is known John Ford skeptic if not critic (and how I hate when a director I admire hates…. another director I admire), and his shades to Ruth are on one hand a man who prefers the hard way, law and order as far as carrying out hangings rather than shooting a known criminal because that would be easier, and on another hand has such reactionary, physical cartoonish impulses that turn violent in attacking his current bounty, Daisy Domergue. Much can be made of the ways the assaults of Domergue play out. At first it is so shocking that you definitely cannot help but let out a laugh, and you may even still laugh when Major Warren himself gets involved, but then it becomes something that is wearing down. Daisy is not letting up despite this abuse (we soon know why and we’ll get to that later) and at some point, for me at least, the assaults turn directly on John Ruth. It begins to show his weakness. He, who interrogates every man he has ever come across in this film as to maintain a certain stability, shows incredible instability in these violent acts. There is something about Domergue that makes it seem he cannot keep his bearings despite being not just on the right side of the law but on the right side of history. So when in the first 10 or so minutes of this feature we have Kurt Russell’s Ruth striking Jennifer Jason Leigh’s Domergue, we are already seeing a decaying sense of law and order in a grotesque and cartoonish fashion.  Domergue becomes this rapidly mutating virus toward Ruth- and soon enough personifies that virus meets host.  

On John Ruth’s side of the Union is Major Marquis Warren, as played splendidly by Samuel L. Jackson. This is a man we can say has certain grudges and grievances about what happened during the war. He survived and escaped being a POW by burning the whole camp down to be free, and yet, it seems he does still have to be in the mindset of mentally disarming people, even those who shared his views, by associating with the late President Lincoln, the 16th American President continues his presence in American cinema as a God-like figure (we will get to that later). His forge of the Lincoln letter to impress the likes of John Ruth is meant to disarm, to suddenly be seen as a charming black folk who has the approval from Honest Abe to be considered all right to fraternize with other white folk. When Chris Mannix mentions he heard something from the Union side that they thought Warren was too dangerous and radical for the cause, you tend to believe it not because you think Warren went too far, but that you believe that there are more than likely white folks who are scared of Warren for exactly the reasons he laid out, that white people are only comfortable around him unarmed. But in the way Warren uses the Lincoln letter to disarm even the most sympathetic white folks, he raises his own spectre of the most grotesque things imaginable used to dehumanized black men like himself to pretty much rub it in the face of Bruce Dern’s Confederate General Sandy Smithers. There is a direct war connection between these two people in the Battle of Baton Rouge where Warren’s central grievances lie on the fact how the captured black soldiers by the Confederates were treated the equivalent of extra cargo and horses, and murdered. Smithers still defends this act, a man who will never learn or be rehabilitated in his ways. So, and this is my interpretation of the events that lead up to what closes out the chapter (and the first half of the 70mm roadshow), Warren tells Smithers a story of what became of Smithers’ lost son and that he stripped the son naked to only sexually assault him through oral sex in graphic detail. But let us note the detail belongs in words and that the cross-fade of the image of this son at the mercy of Warren is with an image of Smithers, as to point to this image being in Smithers’ head. ‘You seeing pictures now?’ We cannot be sure these events had happened, but we do know that Warren then kills Smithers and instead of Warren just killing Smithers right there at first sight, he instead gives him a parting shot of the worst possible thing Smithers could ever imagine having happened to his son due, in part, to what he had done during the war. I, again, do not actually think the events and actions took place, but that Warren is showing the split dualities of his place in the world, not unsimilar to Ruth, that have been essential to his survival. But that does not necessarily mean he has clear control of these dualities, much like Ruth seems to not have control.

We then move to Chris Mannix (for what should be Walton Goggins’ breakout from television) who has declared he is the future Sheriff of Red Rock, but we cannot be certain for it to have been true. Mannix is from the South and part of a group of Southern bandits who tried to fight back for the Confederacy. He holds a grudge for Warren’s actions during the war and even seems to have these urges of contemplating the ways the South could have maintained their old order. But Mannix still feels out of depth against the likes of Warren and Ruth. Heck, Mannix seems to be more on equal footing with O.B., who drives the stagecoach. But we soon find that him and Warren, and to a certain degree Smithers, are all caught in the web of deceit at Minnie’s Haberdashery that didn’t even involve them. 

In a way the first and second halves of the film are about how the first half is about the North and South tensions while the second half reveals a third party, both figurative and literal, that reveals something more evil and worse. It makes sense why this specific story is in the West and a remote location of Wyoming. The American frontier opened up for possibilities of a new life and yet, these second lives of people from the war, that they are holding onto are confronted by something by people without borders, without a real past, not quite tangible. This first comes in the form of Daisy Domergue, who begins the film so feral and so not human-like. She can take these beatings, increasingly looking beyond recognition of a person, let alone a woman. But once you realize what plans were taken on her behalf at Minnie’s Haberdashery, you sense a jocularity to Jennifer Jason Leigh’s performance, such as the over the top hanging gesture, and that she continues to grin in her increasingly toothless (due to increased beatings from John Ruth) smile. The character Daisy Domergue grows in grotesquerie and monstrosity, on the receiving end of one last beating from a poisoned John Ruth, only to have him puke blood in her face that makes her look like the diabolic Carrie White (by the way, Kurt Russell is now in the second grossest Western of the year in addition to being in the first, Bone Tomahawk). She wears his blood almost in pride. We see that the setting of the Haberdashery had been in her favor. Everybody at Minnie’s Haberdashery are of the Domergue gang plus Dern’s Confederate General and have been waiting for Ruth to be there to kill him and take Daisy. They are without borders, without a real back story beyond killing, and can build ruses and charm folks but turn on a dime to kill if it means taking care of their own. The poisoning of John Ruth was a success for Daisy and the Domergue Gang but what was never taken into account was that Mannix and Warren would be involved due to pure happenstance. Daisy’s racist as all can be and would seem sympathetic to the South’s view of blacks, but she nor the Domergue gang take any real stance on the war. They seem to look at the past with a distance, like Oswaldo Mobray declaring the Haberdashery be divided by North and South for the characters involved in the war, something that does not appear to involve any of the Domergue gang. This could be just the case of geography, on the periphery of the war (such as that scene of Blondie and Tuco seeing the Civil War spillover into the New Mexico campaign in Sergio Leone’s The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly that feels so out of their world), but also in time.

Note how in the flashback to Minnie’s Haberdashery that Minnie herself describes Bruce Dern’s Confederate General as an old man in a 'foreign’ uniform. It is an interesting choice of words and given that this is a Tarantino film, it seems on purpose. Minnie, a black woman, seems young enough where she was at most a child during the War and it begs the question of whether or not she was born a free woman due to time or geography. So foreign uniform as the Confederate uniform could represent a type of country that ceased to exist but also just a ‘foreign’ concept to a woman from a different time and place. Again, it shows the possibilities of a growing country that is not specifically tied to a dark past. It is the idea that you can make the rest of America anything you want, and while Minnie’s Haberdashery shows the harmonious side to that oh so very American idea of a post-Civil War inter-racial harmony, Tarantino quickly destroys it by making the Domergue gang the embodiment of evil. The Domergue gang sacking this place by unmercilessly killing everybody in it but one that represent a certain odiousness where it ties back to John Ruth and Major Warren’s debate on frontier justice versus law and order. The Domergue gang know of Ruth’s reputation and prepare accordingly by killing him and any collateral that stands in their way of freeing Daisy. 

Over the course of this film is a slow decay of the idea of law and order in the face of frontier justice. For one thing, one of the upholders of the idea of law and order dies, while the others who respect him are splintered against a group of people who forged bonds to save their own fellow outlaw. This situation forces Mannix and Warren into a bind that ultimately does become a bond. Mannix and Warren are facing monsters and shape-shifters of what may or may not be surrounding them in snowy mountains of Wyoming. Mannix chooses Warren’s side when told by Daisy he can be considered 'an innocent’ as opposed to Warren, who shot her brother dead. When I think about why there is so little backstory on the Domergue gang in that we know equally little about their ruses as much as their real identities not to mention the most prominent ones in Jody and Daisy hardly have any calling card beyond their sadistic and masochistic streaks, I truly do think Tarantino has them standing in for spectres and monsters. They are the sickness, the source of rot and decay in America, an infection, a disease that hits whoever touches them. They are more the future of what evil is to hit the rest of the country as opposed to the already damned North and South from the past. So when Mannix and Warren agree to treat Daisy with some frontier justice, they kill what lied there in the Haberdashery, but who knows if those 15 or so gang members are not going to kill them once the credits roll. Or if those 15 or so members exist at all. Mannix and Warren are screwed anyway due to the amount of blood they lost. In this forged bond they take comfort into Warren’s major lie of the Lincoln letter that Warren reads aloud, as though Lincoln is the deity they must face together as much as Jesus Christ. Lincoln himself wanted reunification and the Union preserved in ways that were not appeasing to his Radical Republican counterparts. Ultimately, Mannix and Warren do achieve what Honest Abe wants before their possible last breaths, but North and South seem out of sorts if not prepared for this growing nation that as much as it is haunted by its past, it also has its other forms of evil hiding, shape-shifting, dropping in, or somewhere else in the distance, unclear. The film The Hateful Eight ends with Roy Orbison’s song 'There Won’t Be Many Coming Home’ that seems to invoke the war, after this scene of two characters achieving inter-racial harmony and North/South Harmony. The lyrics are notably anti-war in the sense of that the man you are killing might as well be your brother and a loss is a loss, equal is equal. These two have accepted their equality but right as they are facing their impending death. The sides they opposed each other on were so much cleaner and clearer for them than what they had just faced and could be facing again. American history is messy and I do think the purposeful lack of clarity in the shadow of the Civil War is the exact point of The Hateful Eight. Even if we did get out of the shadow of the Civil War as a country that expanded and grew, what we became as a growing country was a huge mess with its own darkness.