❝ i am always drawn back to places where i have lived. ❞ ❝ what do you make of that? ❞ ❝ it’s just i didn’t know you’d been in love with her. not like that. ❞ ❝ you can love somebody without it being like that. ❞ ❝ oh, darling, i am sorry. ❞ ❝ oh. don’t be angry. ❞ ❝ you were sweet to see me home. ❞ ❝ i’ve got the most terrifying man downstairs. ❞ ❝ i’m sorry if i frightened you. ❞ ❝ i’ll never get used to anything. anybody that does. they might as well be dead. ❞ ❝ i’ve got to stay awake, there isn’t time to sleep. ❞ ❝ you think i’m lying? ❞ ❝ i’ve taken care of myself a long time. ❞ ❝ oh, for god’s sake, i hate snoops! ❞ ❝ she believes all this crap she believes. you can’t talk her out of it. ❞ ❝ i’m in new york because i’ve never been to new york! ❞ ❝ the mean reds are horrible. you’re afraid and you sweat like hell, but you don’t know what you’re afraid of. except something bad is going to happen, only you don’t know what it is. you’ve had that feeling? ❞ ❝ i told you. you can make yourself love anybody. ❞ ❝ i’m a warmhearted person. it’s the basis of my character. ❞ ❝ everybody has to feel superior to somebody. ❞ ❝ you will be sorry, if you hit me. you wanted to a minute ago: i could feel it in your hand; and you want to now. ❞ ❝ it should take you four seconds to walk from here to the door. i’ll give you two! ❞ ❝ do you believe what i’m saying? ❞ ❝ everything hurts. ❞ ❝ does that make me a whore? ❞ ❝ i don’t think anyone will miss me. ❞ ❝ please feed the cat! ❞ ❝ a girl doesn’t read this sort of thing without her lipstick. ❞ ❝ it’s none of my business. except you’re my friend, and i’m worried. ❞ ❝ you are a bitch. ❞ ❝ i’m very scared. ❞
oh, definitely. any kid living in new york who was like, capable of making memories has 9/11 memories. if we use the 2005 timeline, percy was about 8, but even if we use the 2014 timeline he would’ve been three, and i mean. i was three, and i remember it. manhattan was a nightmare during 9/11. the dust cloud destroyed a bunch of people’s homes, so they had to stay in hotels (the insurance companies were pretty great about that, actually). they shut down the trains and the subways (not to mention the airports) so nobody could get anywhere without walking. people were literally walking across the bridges, trying to get out of manhattan on foot. the sky was so clear that day, you could see and smell the smoke from miles and miles away (like, i’m talking a 40 mile radius, at least). parents were frantically pulling their children out of schools, everyone went home early. and if you lived or worked in manhattan your phone was definitely ringing off the hook (even from people you hadn’t heard from in years). not to mention that almost everyone knows somebody by name who died.
he probably remembers it like most kids do—everything was absolutely nuts and adults all seemed very panicked and were talking to each other in hushed voices or crying, and then his mom showed up and pulled him out of school. he was actually probably in manhattan though so he might have even more vivid memories, like literally being evacuated.
“This was a terrible idea,” Christopher grumbled as they approached the large doors to his family home. One family home, Liz reminded herself. Apparently the Hargraves owned real estate all around the world for both professional and personal use. Even Chris had had a few apartments when he’d worked for Halcyon. She hadn’t learned until relatively recently that his condo there in DC had just been one stop. He had had one very similar - security and all - in New York City for easy access to their offices there. That way of living made his abrupt split with the family business over what had happened even more impressive, and Liz supported him in it.
That didn’t mean that she thought he should ostracise his family on a personal level forever. Especially if they were extending an olive branch. For better or worse, they were his family.
“Hey,” she coaxed softly, touching his arm, “they took a risk inviting us. Both of us. That has to mean something.”
Chris snorted. “Susan and Howard Hargrave are two of the most manipulative people you’ll ever meet on your life. They don’t do anything without a reason behind it. Even inviting their son and his fiancé to dinner.”
“What about telling their son a secret that can only hurt them?”
She saw the twitch at the corner of his lips that showed irritation. “That was Howard, not Scottie.” He reached up to knock on the door hard.
“So you’re pissed at your mother?”
“They both kept it. I’m not letting that go any time soon.”
Liz didn’t have a chance to answer as the door opened and Susan Scott Hargrave offered a smile that probably would have fooled anyone that didn’t know her, and maybe even a few that did. “Christopher. Elizabeth. I’m glad you made it.”
Everybody goes to New York,
looking for something.
Whether it be a new purse,
or a sense of self worth.
Everybody looks upon the lights,
looking for something.
To see themselves within,
or to hope they someday might.
Everybody inhales the city air
looking for something.
Whether it a brand new way to breathe
or the plain stale air
to fill up their lungs
dry out their bones
and crack them.
To kill them in the place
where their soul will live forever
because dreams do not die
in New York City.
Where everyone goes
when they are looking for something.
Everybody finds something in New York
whether they mean to or not.
Whether it be a place to call home
or just a place weird enough to make them feel normal.
Because in the rush of New York City
where people and cars pass
like death in a morgue
nobody is alone.
in a place so vast and broken.
Because like us,
New York is a broken city,
existing upon empty promises
and hopes so big they could burst the heart at the seams
and it will bring together
the broken city within
and you will find a brand new
piece of soul
to mold into whatever you want.
Something brand new to start over with
a brand new piece of yourself.
You will find it in New York,
whether you’re looking or not.
Because everyone goes to New York looking for something,
whether it be a new purse,
or a sense of self worth.
“ — now i’m beginning to remember why we chose to move here,” matthew mused, “though it was nothing like this the last time i visited. i mean, i didn’t really expect a town to change this much but i guess i was wrong. it’s certainly not as small as it used to be, though it still has a very home-y feel. and it’s definitely nothing compared to new york, wouldn’t you agree?” he offered, finally turning his gaze to his companion.
AT&T continues to expand its fiber internet service
AT&T announced yesterday that it’s expanding its gigabit fiber internet service in existing markets and bringing new cities onboard. The expansion, which is centered on the 17 existing metro areas AT&T currently operates its fiber service in, means the company will be serving up speeds as fast as 1,000 Mbps (but likely lower than that in realistic usage scenarios) to more than 4 million homes. To be fair, AT&T still hasn’t brought fiber to some of the largest metropolitan areas in the US, including the San Francisco Bay Area and New York City. Read more
you are on a long, hilly road. every time you reach the crest there is a new farm in front of you. you have been traveling for weeks, you think, but you cant tell, it’s always night. you start to see the same cows
you wake up to a foot of snow but nothing is canceled. you can feel the cold penetrate you in a sharp crack. it continues to snow, an entire blizzard, but no one cares. they continue with their daily lives, the cold chipping away at their appendages. you have forgotten what heat is
a dunkin donuts opens up on the plaza five minutes from your house. another one on the intersection where the main road splinters off and your neighborhood begins. you come home one day to find your house is now a dunkin donuts, its always been a dunkin donuts, what do you mean it used to be your house there
you take the train to new york city and you can feel the pollution on your face. the skyscrapers reach up high, encasing you in glass, until you can no longer see the sky. you have been walking endlessly, you are starving, you want to go home, but the ticket back costs an arm and a leg. you begin gnawing
emmashbates: Had the best couple of weeks exploring Costa Rica followed by a whirlwind spontaneous weekend in NYC. New York I’ll be back for you shortly but in the mean time, England where is sunshine to welcome us home!? 🇺🇸✈️🇬🇧
Summary: As they pack for New York, Blaine finds a letter that Kurt isn’t sure he’s ready to share.
Notes: This fic features some angsty memories, some shmoopy husbands, and a whole bunch of thoughts about what it means to lose a kind of home. Thanks for reading, and let’s hear it for all the joy still to come! I love y’all something fierce.
Special thanks to nadiacreek for the late-night beta!
Blaine found the letter as they were packing for their move back to New York. It was buried deep under a mishmash of junk Kurt had grabbed in his mad rush to come back to Lima. Kurt would have recognized it anywhere, even if he hadn’t been sitting close enough to read over Blaine’s shoulder. He’d started using yellow legal pads for a while, as a sort-of temporary journal. They only lasted a week, one of the many new innovations to come and go during the Blaine-less lull after they had … well, after everything. He’d also tried khaki and a George Foreman grill, but nothing stuck.
As Blaine read, silently, Kurt pretended to rearrange his socks, first with the blue on top and then on the bottom. He itched to explain himself. That letter read like an open wound, all raw confusion and anger that Kurt could hardly recognize. In retrospect, his therapist had been right. The words needed to come out somehow, and if anyone could understand that, it would be the man sitting next to him on his childhood bed.
If Blaine could tell that he was being watched, he didn’t say anything. He just leaned back and read.
hey taylorswift!! I just got home from New York City and while I was there I dropped off a little package for you. inside is a journal and some pictures. I hope you get the chance to read it and if so I hope you like it! it would mean the world to me even if you read just a page.
if you do get a chance to read it please like this post or something. it would mean so much to me. thank you so much for the time you take out of your day, everyday, to us. thank you for everything.