holy shit what is even happening

(OOC) Why I Didn’t Kill Myself

I have not had a very fantastic 20 years, but no matter how I pull them apart and branch off different possibilities as if my life could be simplified to an inconsequential choose your own adventure story, there’s no way I would change what has happened. After a long chat with my sister (nearly 3 hours, like holy shit, how do I even have enough to talk about), I realized that while there are some ideals I would love to have in life, I would hate the reality that I would receive. Sure, I wish my Mom was alive to see important milestones and to be able to run to when everything just seemed to much, but the reality is that it never would be that simple, cookie cutter deal- that wasn’t who my Mom was. And yeah I’m going through what feels like Hell because it’s a God damn throwback Thursday in the worst way. What’s happened recently has brought up a lot of painful memories that I had hoped were buried and in the past, but nothing ever stays that way I suppose.

I confessed to my sister that I have no idea what the Hell I’m doing and that I don’t know why or appreciate that things have gone the way they do. I know that everything has been my decision- rash or not- and that if I’m not where I wanna be, then it’s on me. But she pointed out that over the 20 years I’ve been alive, I’ve been through more than most people have to deal with in their entire life course, between losing both my parents after having been in a beyond broken home, losing my closest in age sister to suicide, and numerous other things (some of which I still haven’t told and I don’t want to if I don’t have to). I try to take that in consideration, but that doesn’t always mean anything. At my age, some of this shit shouldn’t be such a huge thing, but it is. Everything just seems so overwhelming and I would love to just be able to just duck out of life for awhile and just come back to it whenever I’m ready to deal with whatever bullshit it wants to throw at me next, but that’s not how it works.

I admit I had my time today where I shut my phone off for like three hours after my now ex-boyfriend came and got what I believe is the last of his stuff and I just let it all hit me. He’s gone, what we had is gone, and I’m alone, again. Then came the flood- how the Hell am I supposed to deal with all these bills, with having almost no possessions down here, having a pet to take care of on my own, whether I can stay where I am or do I need to find somewhere else… I damn near bottomed out. I laid in bed, curled up in a ball, feeling so hurt and lost that I couldn’t even muster up the tears to shed over my ridiculous situation. I was messaging people before and after so that no one would hunt me down and give me the are you okay bullshit because no, I’m not okay- I am far from okay. 

All my life people have asked that question and asked for an honest answer and if I gave that honest answer, they would have me committed. There’s a reason for that. I would have to admit that while I laid in bed for those three hours, dozing on and off because I’m physically, emotionally, and mentally beyond exhausted, I contemplated taking that glass cup out from the book shelf next to my bed, shattering it and then stepping on the jagged pieces until one found just the right vein or artery to splice open. Then I could just lay down and slowly bleed to death, a quiet peaceful passing. I would have to explain that the only reason I didn’t act on that plan is because the survival rate is too high. My roommate or someone would likely find me and take me to the ER and then I’m stuck with a huge bill that I’ll pay off when I’m dead because then I’d have to take time off from work to recover and wouldn’t have the money and then the debt collectors would come and I’d be fucked. I don’t want to go back to the behavioral health ward because it’s not going to help otherwise I would’ve had a bigger turn around than I did- I’ve relapsed several times since that week on the ward when I was a junior in high school. 

With that in mind, I still have that part of my conscience that pipes up and says, ‘Hey, what the fuck are you thinking trying to end your life when your sister did that to you and everyone else? Where do you get off thinking it’s okay to pull the same bullshit and getting different results? News flash, you’ve become close with so many people in so many places that you would pretty literally cause world wide grief. Can you even begin to deal with that?’ The answer is no, I can’t even begin to deal with that. As it stands now, my niece will one day too soon have to go through the uncomfortable and scary talk of why she never met Aunt Sammy because Aunt Sammy put a bullet in her brain and I don’t like the thought of being that second story of her never having time with Aunt Lizzy because she cut open her artery and bled to death and it was a huge debate for a long time whether it was an accident or not because of how she died. Then there’s all of you who barely know me and somehow you’ve come to see me as a very close friend if not family. Given that I view you all as family, I can’t hurt you like that, partly because I would have no way to let you all know what I’d done and why because I would be in the midst of dying. But the bigger reason is that it’s not something you burden your loved ones with because whether or not anyone realizes this, you are burdening your loved ones when you commit suicide because they are forever saddled with survivor’s guilt (which is a legitimate thing, it’s taught in psychology and therapists will even diagnose it). 

So today, I almost took that final leap, but instead, I thought of all of you and realized that I couldn’t hurt you or anyone else by killing myself. I don’t want any of you to suffer because I made a dumb decision while I was going through some shit that would eventually be a drop in the ocean in the long run.

I am sorry to anyone I might have scared, worried or anything along those lines. I didn’t mean to stress you like that and hopefully you’ll forgive me. I’m still not in good shape, but I’m a tiny bit better than before. I have a few people to thank for that: My sister, 

@hellagayangelofthelord  @deanismyvessel @hellasarcasticdemonfromhell @driver-picks-the-music-67 @666crowley-king-of-hell666 and even my ex and his mother, who have both been checking in on me to make sure I’m okay because they know just how hard things have been and how much I gave up to try and start a new chapter here with them.

So thank you to all of you, even those of you who didn’t know that I was going through this. It was a nice distraction to be able to glance through your posts and try to forget that things aren’t even close to decent. Thank you again and here’s some lyrics to a song that helped me get through today:

“ I am sorry this is always how it goes
The wind blows loudest when you’ve got your eyes closed
But I never changed a single colour that I breathe
So you could have tried to take a closer look at me
I am tired of punching in the wind
I am tired of letting it all in
And I should eat you up and spit you right out
I should not care but I don’t know how…

I am sorry for the trouble, I suppose
My blood runs red but my body feels so cold
I guess I could swim for days in the salty sea
But in the end the waves will discolour me…

So I take off my face
‘Cause it reminds me how it all went wrong
And I pull out my tongue
'Cause it reminds me how it all went wrong

And I cough up my lungs

'Cause they remind me how it all went wrong

But I leave in my heart 'Cause I don’t want to stay in the dark…”

- Of Monsters and Men, “Organs”

Originally posted by amisplacedlonelyheartsad

I’ve been seeing a man in my backyard for the past two nights

Story by reddit user Opinionson

To start I need to give some background:

I am a male who lives in relatively nice neighborhood

It’s your average small town run of the mill suburbs area with not a lot of people.

I am a college kid who’s home on break while my parents have gone away which doesn’t help at all.

I have a two story house

I do not have gun nor do I have any real weapons other than kitchen knives

I am not on any medication and I have no record of schizophrenia or any other mental illnesses

I barely have any relationships with my neighbors most of whom are elderly and the rest I have minimal contact with

I do not have any people in my neighborhood (that I know of) who have reasons to attack or harm me

Now, let’s get into what has been happening. About two nights ago I woke up very late in the night and I went to the bathroom to go take a shit. Now, my second story bathroom has a window that can see the entirety of my backyard. Directly behind it is a cul de sac which you can see directly into. There is a group of trees and pile of rocks and mulch that divides it. Usually I can see everything in my backroom without turning on my because lights from my neighbor’s house dimly lights the room.

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My mom visited a Sherlock Cafe -- Jealousy ensues

Okay so– my mom (who is a pretty big BBC Sherlock fan even though she tries to stay low-key about it) is in China right now for work purposes and she happened upon a BBC Sherlock cafe and I just??

What –


Holy shit?? She sent me so many photos of the place and I am in LITERAL agony

LOTS more under the cut because ho boy….there is a lot. 

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Otabek's DJ Friends

•They’re the super irresponsible friend group all of us have at one point or another

•Although Otabek is the youngest of them, he’s definitely the Mom Friend™ and keeps them from doing overly stupid stuff

•His friends from DJ'ing is made up of other DJ’s, people working at the places he DJ’s at, and regulars who always go to see him play (there are like 6 of them)

•They seem all tough on the outside (like Otabek) but they’re actually some of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet

•Viewing parties whenever Otabek has a competition??? Of course.

•They’re screaming at the TV (much like most sports fans will yell at a football game) during these competitions


•When he first met them they knew literally nothing about figure skating but they asked Otabek to teach them all about it so now they’re Experts™

•Along with being the Mom Friend™, he’s the smol youngest friend in the group (how he pulls off both titles the world may never know)

•They love to tease him about being younger than them even tho it’s only by like a year


•As soon as they saw what happened in Barcelona at the GPF they shipped it

•They insisted on meeting Yuri over skype (much to Otabek’s embarrassment) to make sure he was worthy of their friend

•Immediately adopted Yuri as an honorary member of the group as soon as they met him

•Literally willing to fight anyone who talks shit about Otabek or Yuri

•They’re always giving Otabek advice on dating because they claim they’re superior at relationships just because they’re older

•Otabek always texts with perfect capitalization and punctuation in their group chat except when he’s talking about Yuri, then he breaks out the all caps


-Mod Jess

bad | 06

He was the cliché bad boy. He was the guy you couldn’t stand. He was the handsome, hot kid who made girls go weak in the knees. He was a brat. You had never liked him one bit, but you had also never gotten involved with anything concerning him. Until one day, when you were in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

Originally posted by jjks

MEMBER: jeon jungkook x reader (ft. kim taehyung)

GENRE: future smut, romance, fluff, angst(?), badboy!au

WORDS: 5 125

WARNINGS: mature themes, language

| 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07coming soon ↠ 

A/N: here IT IS! for all you children who are waiting for smut, do not worry, I know. just be patient ;) remember, everything happens for a reason. don’t kill me for this.

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Into You [Side to Side Pt. 2]

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Request(s)(Ooh boy here we go):

  • Wow! I loved your Peter Parker imagine. Pleeaaassseee do more of those because damnnnn
  • side to side is soo perfect akhjjkfjkas im in love pls write another part
  • Park 2 for side to side?
  • Can I please get a continuation to side to side. Please!!! I loved it, could it be the smutty continuation please ❤️ Love your writing BTW

Word Count: 3148… I got carried away with this… Sorry/not sorry

Song: Gee I wonder… Into You by Ariana Grande

Summary: You and Peter work out what happened at the gym in the most sinful way possible… by doing it again. Only this time, you get it right.

Warnings: Sinsinsinsinsin, swearing, oral (both receiving), creepy Flash, idk if there are any warnings that aren’t smut related tbh

Author’s Note: I need to specify apparently, both Peter and the reader are the same age. Nothing illegal is happening in this, don’t hate on me. ALSO! This is my first smut ever. Pass me some holy water, y’all this is some spicy shit.

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v:ld hc

Okay but imagine this

Lance having a hard time bc of the team (a misunderstanding maybe or a “shut UP Lance” situation or the “stop messing around, get serious, be useful for once” stuff but whatever it is it’s really bringing him down) making him think he’s worthless and doesn’t deserve a spot on Team Voltron

But the alarm goes off while he’s getting a lecture from Allura or Shiro and he’s forced to go get Blue to fight off the Galra with the Team

During the battle he gets injured (nobody even noticed him yelling over the comm during the fight) and the team frets over him afterward because /holy shit Lance you’re barely standing what the hell happened/ and he just can’t deal anymore

They can only stare in shock as tears run down Lance’s bloodied face and they hear his broken whisper-

“So now I matter?”

Involved: Part 4

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader 

A/N: okay so there is smut in this but it isn’t very detailed because like? this is a big part and i needed it to be about more than the horizontal hanky panky anyway im pretty sure im only gonna do one more part after this so here we go PSA this is not good, it’s 3:30 am and im locking that in as my final excuse

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 5

Originally posted by tomshollandss

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wecheesecakeme  asked:

“Wait, don’t pull away… Not yet.” - With Peter Parker? I love your writing btw 😍👌🏻

[ Also requested by @mr-zippy ]

Originally posted by sexy-stan

You tried not to be afraid when he told you the tales of an armed robbery that he stopped or the mugger he had helped put behind bars. Peter was doing amazing things and the last thing he needed was a worried girlfriend on his back 24/7.

For the most part, keeping your emotions at bay was quite simple. You acted excited for Peter no matter how fast your heart was beating in anxiety. Peter himself wouldn’t have ever known about your fears if he hadn’t crawled into your window one night with a multitude of cuts and bruises.

“Holy shit Pete! What the hell happened?” You almost sobbed, pushing back the covers away from your groggy body. He looked even worse than your nightmares could imagine.

“Eh. Just a little hit-and-run.” He coughed out nonchalantly, gripping onto your shoulder once you offered him support. “But hey. They didn’t get away.” He smirked, accentuating the cut splayed across his upper lip.

“That’s good.” You mumbled meekly while leading Peter towards your cushioned bed. You bit your tongue in order to keep any feelings from spilling into the silence.

Peter grunted as you sat him down on the mattress, placing both legs out in front of him and a pillow behind his neck. “Sorry for coming here so late. It’s just that May wasn’t working late tonight and I don’t really need her seeing this.” He laughed humorlessly before laying back slightly.

“It’s alright Peter.” You nodded before reaching for a first aid kit that you kept for nights like these. “I’m just gonna work on your face for now.”

Peter sighed contently before wincing at the slight pressure being placed on a particularly large gash. “Sorry.” You mumbled before reaching for a few butterfly-style bandaids.

He watched with great attention as you worked and noticed that anytime he winced, tears found their way into your eyes. Peter softly grabbed your wrist, stopping the motion of cleaning and making you stare at him with wide eyes.

“What’s the matter Y/n?”

You were shocked to hear that question make its way out of his lips. He was beaten and battered and laying on several bruised limbs and he was worried about you?

“Nothing Peter.” You shook your head before attempting to go back to work on his gashes. He stopped you once again, this time with a hand on your cheek. Softly caressing the frown lines hidden against the skin.

“No Y/n. I know that something is bothering you and I wanna know what it is.” His tone was sensitive, yet stern as he hoped for you to resign to your hidden feelings.

A shaky sigh escaped as you glanced away from the brown irises that drew out your deepest and darkest fears. “I just…I’m worried about you.”

Peter tilted his head slightly, confused as to why you were so afraid to tell him such a kind thing. “Hey. I’m alright, yeah?” He grabbed both of your hands. “Plus I have an amazing nurse to come to when I’m not.”

You smiled as Peter beamed back at you. He would have never thought that someone as sweet as you would be his and care for him as much as you do. “I’m sorry that I cause this. I never want to make you hurt Y/n.”

You nodded. “What you’re doing is outstanding Peter and I support you.”

Suddenly, his arms wrapped tight around your figure, squeezing you like a giant teddy bear. He rocked you back and forth slightly before beginning to move away.

“Wait.” You whispered, pulling him back to you. “Don’t pull away…not yet.”

Peter chuckled quietly and settled his chin on your head as you tucked yourself into his chest. “I love you, Y/n.”

Blurb requests closed! Sorry!

Jealous ~ Peter Parker

Request: Hi, love your writing! Can I get a Peter Parker imagine where the reader and Peter are best friends and he likes her so for her birthday he takes her to meet all the Avengers at the tower and she’s a really big fan/crush on Cap and Bucky and it makes Peter jealous and you can decide the rest. Thank you doll

Word count: 1,018

Relationship; Peter Parker X Female!reader, Feat Bucky Barnes, and Captain America 

Warnings: Jealous Peter, Kissing, minor swearing

A/N: I had this take place at the new Avengers facility since in homecoming they moved to a new location

“Peter can I take off the blindfold now” I whined as he grabbed my hand leading me somewhere for my birthday.

“No, Y/N if you took it off now it wouldn’t be a surprise” He replied. I didn’t even need to see him know he had a stupid smirk on his face.

“Ugh, Peter you know I hate surprises and you” I sighed, as we continued to walk. I probably looked

“Well that’s unfortunate because you’re going to love me in about two minutes” he laughed. I heard him push open a door, and he briefly let go of my hand and placed it on my back, swiftly pushing me into wherever the hell he was taking me.

“Peter Benjamin Parker I swear to go if you don’t take this blindfold off soon I’m going to-” I was cut off by Peter coming from behind me and slowly taking off the blindfold. “Peter” I whispered.

“Yes Y/N” he laughed

“Are we at the new Avengers base” I squeaked as I tried not to freak out.

“What does it look like” he retorted laughing at me, probably because I looked like a five year on Christmas day. I saw a jet start to take off and I practically sprinted to the window watching fly away faster than I’ve ever seen anything go. Peter was definitely right about me loving him after I found out my surprise. I turned on my heel and I ran back to Peter practically pouncing on him wrapping my arms around him and squeezing him so tight I pretty sure he was having trouble breathing.

“Thank you so much, Peter” I mumbled into his neck. I pulled from the hug, to see Peter as red as a tomato, and I could feel my cheeks start to heat up too, so I quickly looked down at my feet.

“So you must be the birthday girl” I heard from behind. I whipped around to see Bucky Barnes and Captain America. I felt the urge to scream and run away since I’ve been obsessed with them since I was literally 9.

“Oh my god, this is not happening right now, Peter you did not do this for me” I squealed, and Peter gave me a warm smile.

“So how old are you turning” I heard Bucky ask.

“16” I blurted out, still trying to process what was happening right now.

“Pete watch out looks like your little girlfriend here can drive you around soon” Captain laughed and I’m pretty Peter’s face managed to get redder than before. I laughed, not even denying the girlfriend because honestly, I wanted to be his girlfriend, but no way in hell I would ever tell anyone that. I watched as the captain took off his mask revealing his gorgeous face.

“Holy shit he’s was hotter in person,” I said under my breath. I definitely think Peter heard because I heard him sigh, and when I turned around he quickly looked at the floor.

“Do you want to get some pictures?” Bucky asked. I practically passed out right there and then. I quickly handed Peter my phone and I went in the middle of them. We took a ton of pictures with different poses. I even got to hold Cap’s shield which was the coolest thing I’ve ever done in my life. When I looked up at Peter he looked pretty annoyed. Cap leaned down and whispered into my ear

“You know he likes you more than a friend right”?

“No he doesn’t, that’s crazy he’s just my best friend” I argued, feeling the blood rush my cheeks.

“Trust me Y/N, I’ve been around a long time, and Peter is head over heels for you” He assured.

“Really” I questioned

“Yes,” I heard Bucky laugh.

“He’s been giving us the death glare the past twenty minutes” Cap chuckled.

“What should I do,” I asked

“Make a move, of course, I mean only if you feel the same way” Cap replied smiling at me.

“I would just kiss him, it makes life way easier, then you don’t have to admit anything” Bucky chuckled. After giving me a small pep talk They both gave me hugs and went off to do whatever they do in their free time I guess. Which made me want to know what they were doing, but who cares.

“Thank you so much for this Peter,” I said pulling him into another hug.

“It’s no problem” He mumbled his voice laced with jealousy.

“Peter there is no reason to be jealous” I blurted out.

“I’m not jealous” He insisted turning away from me. I decided to go with what Bucky said to do since it seemed to be the easiest so I quickly moved to I’d be facing him and I grabbed his face and slammed my lips to his. Funny thing was it didn’t even take him that kong to kiss back. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him. My skin felt on fire everywhere he touched, and his soft plump lip felt like heaven on mine. Eventually, I pulled away for air. Peter still had his eyes closed and I looked up and I saw Bucky and Cap giving me a thumbs up from the second story of the building and I smiled.

“That was the best Birthday present ever” I giggled.

“I pretty sure that was more of a present for me” Peter corrected

“That’s debatable” I challenged grabbing his hand as we walked out of the facility. That was by far the best birthday I’ve ever had and I think the best I’ll ever have.

A Thought

Feyre just returned to the Spring Court. She has her relieved victim mask on, Tamlin thinks everything is back to normal, Lucien is still suspicious af, everything is going smoothly—then Ianthe makes an appearance.

Ianthe goes into hysteria, making apologies and excuses, saying how she never meant to hurt anyone personally, that she didn’t know this would happen blah blah blah. And Feyre’s mask slips.

The memory of the roses, of what just transpired in Hybern, and what Ianthe had done to her mate and countless others had Feyre punching the priestess square in the jaw. Sending her reeling to the ground.

Tamlin looks at Feyre like ‘wtf just happened’ and even Lucien stops his 'I’m so on to you’ look in turn for a 'holy shit she really just did that’ look. Feyre just steps around Ianthe and carries on her way with an 'Oops.’

Highly unlikely? Most definitely. But was this fun to write? Of course. And would it be satisfying? Hell. Yes.

  • Me the day before therapy: Holy shit there's so much I need to tell my therapist, about, my week has literally been soo weird and I found out like everything about myself!
  • Me 5 mins before therapy: Wtf what happened last week omg okay just calm down and see if you can remember anything. At all!
  • Me in therapy: No, nothing special happened, I don't even remember most of it because it was just the same as every week haha.
technically single || stuart twombly (smut)

word count: 6278

warnings: oral (both receiving), smut, strip club, unestablished relationship

author’s note: so i was listening to the way i are by timbaland and i just felt the need to use it as some sinsipration! enjoy xo

pairing: stuart twombly / reader

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randomperson009  asked:

How about a fic of Lance getting amnesia? And like his personality is a bit different too? Thank you! (And sorry if I sound like a bother!)

You’re no bother at all my dear!! And good fic idea! Hope you enjoy! 🖤🖤
“Is he done yet?” Hunk questioned, pressing his nose against the glass of the healing pod. Coran leaned forward, pursing his lips. “Hmm..just a few more ticks, and he should be out!” Keith crossed his arms. “He wouldn’t even be in this mess if he didn’t push me out of the way and tried to sacrifice himself.” Shiro walked toward him, resting a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “He’ll be alright, Keith. Lance is strong, he can handle this.” Keith gave him a grim nod. The team stared at Lance’s unmoving form, waiting. Finally, a familiar hiss erupted from the pod, door coming open. Keith rushed forward, catching Lance as he wobbled and began to fall. The team gathered around them as Lance slowly blinked his eyes open. “Welcome back to the land of the living.” Pidge chuckled. Lance slowly looked up at her, brow furrowing as he scrunched his eyes. “Uh..who are you?” The team hesitated, and Pidge just let out a nervous laugh. “Come on, Lance. Quit joking around!” Lance looked even more confused. “How do you know my name?” Lance frantically looked around, panic rising. “W-where am I?” Keith gripped Lance’s arms. “Lance, it’s okay. Just calm down, alright. We’re in space and-” “SPACE?? As in oUTER SPACE?!” Lance gawked. Pidge face palmed. “Probably should’ve eased him into that one, Keith.” “Wait wait wait! What do you mean space? Why aren’t we in Cuda? And is that aN ALIEN??” As Coran began to explain to Lance what was going on, the other stepped to the side. “What the heck is wrong with him?” Keith asked. Shiro looked back over to Lance, whose eyes were wide and mouth hanging open as he listened to Coran. “I guess from the combination of being knocked out and being in the pod for that long, he has suffered some amnesia. I know this isn’t ideal, but hopefully he’ll get his memories back soon. Just help him out until then, alright?” The team nodded. Keith ran his hand over his face and through his hair. This was gonna be interesting.
The team noticed that Lance was…different. He hardly ever cut his jokes or ever told pick up lines. He was..quiet. Shy even. He did as he was told, ate with them and participated in idle chit chat, even trained with them. But it wasn’t the same. The team were in the living quarters when they discussed this. “I never knew how quiet it would be without Lance.” Pidge mumbled with her face pressed against the cushions. Keith pulled one leg up to his chest. “Yeah, he never tries to challenge me in anything or bickers with me. I always thought it would be nice if he stopped, but now I miss it…miss him.” The team nodded in agreement. Shiro sighed, sinking to the floor. “I know this is hard team, but we gotta be strong and wait until Lance is back to normal.” Keith flared his nostrils. “It’s been four day, Shiro! Four!! How much longer does he need?!” Hunk rubbed his face, letting his back rest against the pillows. “I wish I knew. I miss my old buddy.” Keith flung himself from the couch. “Keith, where are you going?” Keith stomped toward the door. “I’m going to the training room. Maiming whacking a few droids will-” THWACK!! Keith quickly pulled back the door, seeing Lance knocked to the floor, unconscious. The team rushed over. “Holy shit, Keith!! What did you do?!” I don’t know! I just shoved the door open! I didn’t even know he was there!“ “Quiznak, how hard did you shove the door?” Hunk interrupted them. “Guys! He waking up!” The team gathered around Lance as he groggily woke up, letting out a small groan. Lance slowly opened his eyes, peering at his teammates faces as they stared down at him. “Uh..what just happened?” “Keith knocked you out with the door.” “Don’t say it like that! It makes it sound like a did it on purpose!” “Guys!” Lance shouted. “I’d love to stay here and argue about if Keith knocked me out on purpose, but can I please go and put on a face mask? I feel like I haven’t done one in a week, my pores are dying. Oh, and can we ask Allura to stop at another space small to pick up some more? I’m almost out?” The team stared at him with wide eyes. “Lance…do you know where you’re at?” Lance arched his eyebrow. “Uhh…space? Where we’ve been for the past like months? Are you guys okay?” The team stared at him more and then suddenly dog-piled on top of him. “Lance you’re back!” “Welcome back, buddy!” “It took you long enough!” Lance wheezed from underneath them. “Can somebody please tell me what the heck is going on??”

You're A Dog Person, Right? (Seth Clearwater)

“Please?” I pleaded.

“Y/N you know I would if I could, but I can’t.” Seth, my boyfriend, explained for about the thousandth time.

“Seth, why can’t you tell me?!” I asked, getting more irritated with his secrecy.

“It’s not my secret to tell, Y/N!” he said.

“Okay, you’re making no damn sense! If it has something to do with you, it is your damn secret to tell! Come on, Seth.” I begged one final time.

“Y/N, I just can’t.” he said with a sigh.

“I’m done with this shit, Seth. Both you and Leah started keeping some big ass secret that y'all don’t want to tell anybody and so, I’m done.” I said, pushing myself off of the Clearwater’s couch.

“Y/N, please don’t do this to me. I can’t lose you.” Seth pleaded, grabbing my hand.

“We’re not supposed to keep secrets from each other, Seth. I haven’t ever kept anything from you, I expected the same.”

With that, I grabbed my stuff and walked out the door.


I stayed at home all weekend, not doing my traditional Saturday movie with Seth. I didn’t know if we were broken up or just in the middle of an argument or what, but it sucked.

One thing that did give me some happiness is that Seth didn’t give up. He was relentless. For the past two days, he had blown my phone up with texts and even more calls.

I heard a knock on my door while I was getting ready for school Monday morning.

I knew who it was before I got there but my heart still did a little leap when I opened the door and saw him again.

Even though he looked like shit.

“Y/N.” he said, taking me in.

Hell, I probably didn’t look too good either.

See, when I said that I was getting ready for school, I actually meant I was frantically looking for my last pair of black sweatpants and my hair hadn’t been properly combed/brushed in the past three days.

“Seth, its good to see you.” I said honestly.

“You too, baby.” he replied.

“Y/N, I’m ready to tell you.” he said, extending his hand out.

I took it without hesitation.

We hopped in his mom’s car and started back towards the reservation.


Seth led me to a patch of woods not far from Sam and Emily’s place.

He took my hands in his.

“I know this is unfair of me to ask, but please don’t freak out when everything is out in the open.” he laughed, nervously.

“Seth, come on. It can’t me that bad, can it?” I asked, rubbing my thumbs over his knuckles.

“Well…..” he laughed.

“You’re a dog person, right, baby?” he asked, walking away from me.

I looked behind me to check to see if there was anybody to help my poor little Seth, because he had apparently lost it.

“I mean yes, but I don’t see how that has anything to -” I turned back to see a gigantic, sandy colored wolf in front of me.

“Oh, my holy shit!” I screamed.

And I guess the universe thought this was some low budget, horror movie shit because my dumbass literally tripped over my own damn feet.

The wolf didn’t try to pounce or attack or anything. He just looked at me.

Then he started backing up and retreated back into the woods. I took this time to run back to Emily and Sam’s. I ran into their house, where all of our friends were.

“Guys, I just saw this big ass wolf out in the woods. It was like, I don’t even fucking know! And, I don’t even know what the hell happened to Seth! I think it might’ve eaten his ass!” I explained, breathlessly.

Just then, Seth came running up to the house.

“Holy shit, Seth! I thought that thing ate you!” I told him as I forced him into the tightest hug I could give.

“Y/N, that’s kinda what I wanted to talk to you about.” he said, shuffling me back to look at me.

He took me out to the porch steps.

“Seth, that big ass wolf might come back.” I said, frantically looking over my shoulder.

“I don’t think it will.” he said, pulling me down to sit with him on the step.

“Baby, that wolf was actually me.” he said, completely serious.

"What?” I asked, I must’ve heard that wrong.

“I’m that wolf. I’m a werewolf or shapeshifter, if you will. All of us are: me, Leah, Paul, Jacob, Jared, Quil, Sam, all of us.“ he tried to explain.

"Seth, baby. What in the actual fuck are you talking about?” I asked, extremely worried about my boyfriend’s mental

Seth, with the help of Leah, explained everything to me and Leah assured me that the wolf today was in fact Seth.

"Holy, shit.” I said, exhausted from today’s event.

“I know it’s a lot to take in and I get if you just need some time or whatever you-,” he started.

“So, you, Seth Clearwater turn into a giant, vampire fighting, wolfie soldier at will?” I interrupted.

“And we’re kinda soulmates,” he laughed.

I sat there, in between the Clearwaters, who were werewolves, in front of a house full of werewolves.

“So, like, are you going let me ride on your back or what?”