holy shit i need to stop

  • <p> <b>Before seeing Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them:</b> Four more movies????? Holy shit, JKR, stop milking this fucking franchise before you ruin Harry Potter for all of us<p/><b>After seeing it:</b> Give me 300 more movies. Make it into a TV show. I need more soft Hufflepuff autistic Newt Scamander and his beautiful creatures. also Queenie, my dimpled flapper wife<p/></p>

all of the adults in hunter x hunter consecutively and repeatedly fail all of the children in hunter x hunter as a direct result of the fantasy culture. like the entire world in hunter x hunter is ridiculously broken. no one stopped a six year old who was abandoned at a pro fighting ring and asked him if he was lost. no one tried to call his fucking parents. killua doesn’t even realize there was anything wrong with how he was raised. gon (a child’s) reaction to being hit (while literally helpless and paralyzed) by hisoka (an adult, with all the power), then told that gon owes him for being allowed to live is not “holy shit i need an adult” but “i have to prove that i don’t owe him”. if you’re powerful enough there are no consequences for breaking the law because the mainstream police don’t have nen. the zoldycks can literally have everyone in the vicinity knowing where they live and what they do with no consequences. the outside of their house is a fucking tourist attraction for chrissake. the phantom troupe can pretty much just massacre people whenever they want. all meaningful power lies in the hunter organization which is capricious and poorly run at best and downright corrupt and self-serving at worst and which actively condones child soldiers among its ranks. becoming a hunter essentially makes you a special kind of citizen and the easiest way to become a hunter is be very good at violence. the world is built in a way that allows the staple fantasy narrative of “adventure and conquering over enemies through physical violence is heroic” to play out and togashi, from the start, makes us aware of how dysfunctional a world that would be. the systems that would allow this kind of story to happen would have to be extremely broken and would have fundamental psychological and physical consequences on the people who would have to live in it. (I see a lot of Harry Potter fans talking critically about the broken logic of systems in the HP universe, for example, even though those systems are textually normalized and treated as functional. I think that’s badass.) that’s the core of why i say that hxh is a criticism/engagement/takedown (“deconstruction” is technically the wrong word) of YA combat-glorifying-type adventure fantasy. LOTR, Harry Potter, etc. i could go on about this for years

Soulmates feel one anothers’ pain AUs


  • ‘I came to stop this street fight because that really big punch you just recieved made me scream at a cashier. Also are you injured?’ AU
  • ‘This public toilet has a knuckle-shaped hole in the wall, is this anything to do with you? Because five minutes ago it felt like my knuckles were on fire’ AU
  • ‘Holy shit you just got stabbed, you need help but also god my stomach feels like it’s exploding’ AU
  • ‘I think you’re my soulmate because you’re biting your lip and mine’s hurting now’ AU
  • ‘I just banged my knee on that table over there and you hissed in pain, dude I think we’re soulmates’ AU


  • ‘Please don’t touch that flame, I’m/we’re in a public place and I don’t want to scream’ AU
  • ‘Why do you insist on taking out staples by hand?’ AU
  • ‘Please don’t hurt yourself, I can’t stand seeing you in pain and nor could I stand the pain myself knowing why I feel it’ AU
  • ‘For the love of God use oven gloves next time, my boss was about to promote me when I swore in their face’ AU
  • ‘I can feel your stress headache is everything okay?’ AU
  • ‘I came to find you at work to tell you to stop knocking so violently on your coworker’s office door’ AU
  • ‘Why must you get a tattoo whilst I’m trying to sleep?’ AU

some doodles with a trio of dresses i found in my massive fashion folder

Chronicle of a Cynical Young Gay as She Experiences Star Trek
  • Cynical Young Gay: Star Trek is a queer shipping classic. Since I like TV, and gays, I should finally check it out!
  • CYG, after three episodes: Okay, wow. So I knew it was gay but I didn't realize it was going to be THIS gay, this... explicit? There's a lotta stuff going on here subtextually. Kirk and Spock fit so well with each other, so beautifully! the show is clearly about them.
  • Two seasons deep: Kirk and Spock are so fucking in love holy shit holy SHIT? it simply DOES NOT STOP? God they're such a perfect pair. Jim needs spock to believe in him Spock calls jim Jim THey had SEX DURING PON FARR? star trek is very moving and romantic
  • Finishing the 3rd season: Okay, okay, I get it. It was the 60s. Gene did all he could, and you know what? I feel like the five year mission is Kirk and Spock's 1895. they're always out there, exploring deep space, together, in love. It's so smart for gene to leave the series this way and to feel like they'll always be diving open-ended into new worlds and new adventures. So smart, so clever. So glad the five year mission never ends and kirk and spock are happy forever
  • The Motion Picture: (。◕‿◕。)


this is very difficult for me because i basically want to sit here and continue screaming but here’s what i think mom’s plan is.

she says chloe is the key – she’s special, she’s the one that will get them back into heaven. in the next episode we see chloe and lucifer running away/it is the episode with the plane that lauren was posting pictures from. there is also chloe with a nosebleed and a terrified lucifer, as she says it won’t stop, as we know tim dekay’s characters for 2x12 and 2x13 is a “brilliant neurosurgeon” whose presence is going to result in the death of someone lucifer adores cares about.

this episode had the bombshell reveal that god personally made sure chloe was born – she is a miracle, she is a gift, she is fully human but she’s also something he created specially, and clearly knows she was going to meet lucifer, but also that they have had to CHOOSE each other every step of the way. chloe did that this episode, after we’ve seen lucifer do it so often. she valued her relationship with him over getting her father’s killer sent to jail. she will choose him as often as he will choose her over everything.

(pause to cry because epic next level soulmate true love shit right here.)

anyway, so now mom knows that dad has the ultimate interest in chloe’s life. that he gave her personally to the world. that he will protect her almost as much as lucifer does.

so. mom is presumably just as powerful as dad is, she’s the anti-matter to his matter, the chaos to his creation.

what if she could just… find a way to cancel out that miracle (or threaten to do it?) what if she told her ex that if he didn’t let her and the kids back into the house, she would find a way to taint/destroy/cancel out this little miracle human of his? she knows it would send lucifer off the deep end – amenadiel told her it would. and she also knows it would ruin lucifer beyond any hope of redemption – the devil would fall again, the world would be plunged into chaos, and all dad’s careful plans for the redemption of his favorite son would crumble, because lucifer’s love for chloe is saving the entire world.

because they’re soulmates, because dad is trying to give lucifer this gift, because he and chloe are destined for each other -- mom now knows that chloe is much more than a human, she is part of god’s great plan for lucifer’s life and the redemption of the devil.


so mom is going to blackmail dad with chloe’s life. let us in, or everything you have ever worked for with lucifer is destroyed. i thought i was going to blow her up, but no, i’m going to cancel out the miracle of her existence instead. which makes chloe sick, hence the nosebleeds.

lucifer is going to fight to stop it and save chloe, of course. take her to the neuroscientist, whatever else. neither of them know what’s going on and they’re terrified. they’ve just realised they are in love and now they’re going to lose each other before they ever get the chance to explore it.

and for a time, mom is going to win. chloe is going to die. we are going to be wrecked. lucifer’s going to be wrecked.

but dad is still powerful enough to overcome it. to once more grant mercy to his favorite son, to give him the gift he’s always been meant to have: chloe’s life.

see, mom’s wrong (and i hope she gets a moment where she realises that it’s too late, she’s made a horrible mistake, she can’t stop it and she’s going to destroy lucifer’s life as a result). lucifer and chloe are meant to be together, and by doing so, save the world and achieve god’s greatest plan: the restoration and the rise of the ultimate fallen angel.

you guys, i’m so ruined.

while i understand the point of view from people saying “stop saying everything will be okay, everything might not be ok and we don’t need these fake platitudes” i don’t agree,

 like im sorry you see it as fake platitudes but there are people who would like to feel that the world isn’t ending, and that we still have a fighting shot at resisting what’s to come. everyone is coping differently and i dont see “stay strong we’ll make it through this” as meaning “nothing will happen and everything is ok” i see it as meaning “dont kill yourself because holy shit we have to fight this with everything we’ve got, and we need you”

anonymous asked:

STOP PUTTING SHIT IN RANDOM ASS PLACES FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY. Making an effort to go back to where you found whatever you change your mind on and put it back will make employees love you. One time I was taking a jacket that was thrown on top of a rack of clothes and a lady beside me went 'I feel so awful you have to do that all the time, I can't believe people do that. I wonder what their homes must look like.' Do I really need to say anything.


So I guess Victuri is canon now?? Um. I honestly didn’t believe it would happen. I’m very proud of the creators for making that choice though. Healthy queer relationships need to be more represented, especially in anime? Like holy jeez. As for Free! and @kyoani… YA’LL HAVE SOME BEAUTIFUL, GODDAMN HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS TO WORK WITH HERE. STOP QUEERBAITING THE FUCK OUT OF FREE! LIKE BRUH WE KNOW MAKOTO AND HARU ARE GAY AS FUCK FOR EACH OTHER LIKE. JUST MAKE IT FUCKING CANON ALREADY GOD DAMN. I BEST BE SEEING SOME GAY ASS MAKOHARU/SOURIN/REIGISA CANON LOVEY SHIT IN THIS NEW PROJECT I S2G.


So imagine Sonny and Usnavi go back to the DR on a vacation or to visit in light of Abuela’s funeral ((im basing this off my dad’s excperience when he went back to Holland when he was little)) and it’s like this huge family reunion thing!

Everyone’s literally so happy to see them! And holy shit they did NOT KNOW THEY HAD SO MANY RELATIVES!!! It gets kinda overwhelming for them both bc it’s only ever been them! and now there are so many De la Vega’s everywhere! There are little bebs younger than Sonny! and Sonny, who’s only ever been the youngest, is just like “whuuuuuuuuut are these smol gremlins?”

Usnavi’s in his element! He’s rambling on in Spanish to everyone and loves it. Sonny’s a bit uncomfortable bc his Spanish is pretty rusty, he only ever lived in the DR when he was a baby, and spent most of his life in America, speaking english. So when his cousins come and talk to him, he’s really nervous and tries to stay by Usnavi’s side as much as he can. 

But then, they start asking him about America, and surprisingly, a lot of them know english and translate and talk to him. He gets back into the swing of things, gets excited when he’s telling them about Washington Heights, and Pete and everything. Usnavi rolls his eyes when Sonny starts teaching the younger cousins how to dance like he does. All the other adults think it’s great and laugh and find Sonny charming.

They feel a lot better when they come home ((the entire De la Vega clan comes to see them off at the airport)) and they feel less alone in the world. The next time they go is for Usnavi and Vanessa’s wedding. Benny and Nina, and the Rosario’s and Pete and everyone comes too, and Benny is literally THROWN bc it didn’t really matter too much that he couldn’t speak spanish before but now EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH! Nina helps him along of course, and like Sonny, eventually he gets the hang of it. 

Pete literally never leaves Sonny’s side…..at all during the whole trip.

I want John to be with Sherlock when he’s high.

Not the ‘I haven’t seen you for you a month and holy shit you’re high’ nor the 'You’re high and I didn’t know but we’re not alone’.

I want Sherlock and John on their own, in modern times, Sherlock admitting it to John that he felt the need again. That he couldn’t stop it. That he needed it. And oh God please John, I can’t stop it.

I want John being angry but being more worried. I want John to grab Sherlock and steer him to his bed. I want John to take the list with trembling hands, though he will not look. Not yet. Sherlock is his priority now.

I want John to stay with Sherlock. Keeping a hand on him. Reminding him, silently, that he is not alone. Not this time. I want John to hold him when Sherlock starts to writhe and tremble.

I want Sherlock to cry against John’s jumper.

I want John to cry when Sherlock finally - finally - calms down and drifts to sleep. Because he hates this. He hates seeing Sherlock like this. But he is so relieved that this time, Sherlock came to him. Trusted him. Even with that bloody list!

John pockets it, staying close to Sherlock.

Not alone. Not this time.

This time, Sherlock, I’ll stay.

Rika’s Bordom

Rika: I’m bored

Rika: WAIT

RIka: Let’s start a cult 

V: uh okay

One Cult Later…

Rika: I’m bored again

Rika: hm

Rika: WAIT

Rika: We need members

V: uh okay;;

One Brainwashing Later:

Rika:  That was fun

Rika: But you know what wouldn’t be fun?

Rika: Losing your sight

V: rIKA  N O

One Blindness Later…(holy shit this is getting so long)

Rika: I’m bo-


I’m sorry i was bored


first kiss; or in which kaneki’s new book has a kissing scene and he’s curious about it.. or something.

Just started dating AUs
  • “I came over for dinner and tried your cooking for the first time and you’re such a good cook I’m practically having an orgasm over here oh my god………. stop laughing at me!!” au
  • “We were about to have our first bath together and I was feeling a bit self conscious but then I noticed how much freaking bUBBLE BATH YOU HAVE HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT FOR……………. actually please can we have bubbles I’m secretly just a kid okay” au
  • “I’m really REALLY attracted to you and the first time we had sex I came way too quickly and got super embarrassed about it but you just found it endearing and now you won’t stop smiling at me omg I need to bury my face in this pillow for a thousand years” au
  • “You had no idea that I am allergic to X food/medicine/flowers and now I’m pretty sure I’m having a reaction and we’re gonna have to go to the emergency room like I’ll be fine but just fucking kiss me rly good in case I die okay, okay” au
  • “Why did you pick THAT emoji to go by my contact name oh my god you beautiful weirdo” au

How my brain imagines drunk Simmons:

“I just wish that Grif was mine
When will he see all the signs?
And when-“

“Holy shit, did you drink the entire bottle?”

“Nooooahhhish… Yes. I think the answer is yes.”

“Hey, the rest of the alcohol is mine. I need inspiration to find a word that rhymes with nerd.”

“You… You did? I think. Word rhymes with nerd. Word.”

“Stop showing off. Sarge isn’t even here. Nerd.”