Anybody want a ham sandwich? We took this picture on Sunday afternoon, working on my Dad’s cookbook. This is the cheesiest and most intense food styling I’ve done so far. But I have high aspirations. This ham, and the aroma that filled the house while it was baking, totally took me back to growing up in the midwest and going to holiday parties at my own house and my Nana’s house. She always did criss cross cuts on the ham, with clove studs. Family parties were always pot luck, and people would get fancy, usually in the form of jello mold with fruit suspended in it, or a “salad” with tons of mini marshmallows. If you make this, and have the time to add the garnishes, it’s fun to do and will make a hilariously delicious display at your next BBQ or Springtime / Easter party.
I don’t usually cook such a massive hunk of meat on any old Sunday afternoon with just my husband and I eating, but the leftovers we’ve had so far have been delicious. This ham has a sweetly complex flavor due to glazing for 2 ½ hours with the pineapple glaze. My Dad is really a great cook! Everything I’ve made for his cookbook so far has been completely delicious. I’m going to make split pea soup next, because his recipe for split pea soup has leftover ham in it. I still think I need to give some of this to the neighbors, or maybe I’ll make a big sack of sandwiches and hand them out on the corner. We have way too much meat! That is what she said.
To make this you’ll need 1 ham, 1 can of pineapple rings in natural juice, 1 jar of maraschino cherries, a little honey, brown sugar, and some toothpicks. Heat oven to 325. Make criss cross cuts on the ham and add cloves to the center of each diamond shape. Cover tightly with foil and bake for an hour. While it bakes, make the glaze using the juice from the pineapple can, 2 tablespoons brown sugar, a big drizzle of honey and 1 tablespoon apricot jelly. Heat to bubbling, and then on low for about 20 minutes to reduce. After an hour, remove ham from oven, uncover and glaze with a few tblsp of the glaze, cover back up and return to oven. Remove from oven & glaze every 20 minutes to half hour for the duration of cooking. At the end of cooking, remove ham from oven and decorate with pineapple rings & maraschinos, securing them with cloves and toothpicks. Bake another 20 minutes or so uncovered with more glaze to caramelize the pineapple. Serve with scalloped potatoes, spring vegetables, jelly beans, Peep salad & chocolate bunnies. Yum!!
About 10 years ago, I say, ‘Mum, can we have a ham at Christmas?’ And she goes, 'Yes. And you can make it.’ I’m not good at following recipes. The first bit involves soaking the meat so all the salt comes out. I couldn’t be bothered, so I just scored it with cloves, smothered it in sugar and mustard, and cooked it. It went well until the entire family woke up in the middle of the night, gasping for water. The ham was like one massive grain of salt! Now I’m much better at it. Maybe I should become like Gwyneth Paltrow and have a cooking website. I’ll call it Salty Ham! There’s my new career.
I’m so bummed I didn’t get to post this last year. In fact it happened the day after Christmas, but I think it still counts because the injury occurred during the aftermath of Christmas celebrating.
My lovely grandmother, who I guarantee is way cooler than yours (just sayin), was slicing up some left over roast beast for a delicious day-after-Christmas sammich. Unfortunately, her knife was not the sharpest in the drawer. It slipped and sliced her hand instead of the ham.
Thanks to her daily aspirin and the very unfortunate placement of the cut above a very mobile joint, she began to bleed like a stuck pig.
Pressure, super glue, and band-aids were not cutting it, so she bought herself a visit to urgent care to see someone who was very likely the famed Dr. Cranquis himself. Cranquis stitched her expertly and she went about her merry little way.
So a word to the wise: it sounds counter-intuitive, but sharpen your knives before digging into your roast beast today. It’ll keep the knife in the beast and out of your hand…