hold up can we talk about this for a sec

The winners

Read the intro here

Read the whole story on ao3 here


“Attention! Attention! May we have your attention please?” Fred, George and Lee were standing on an improvised stage in the three broomsticks. The pub was filled with busy chatting students, but now they were quieting down.

“My dear fellow humans.” Stated Fred. “Today has been a wonderful day, with one exception.” He looked around the crowd with a cheeky grin on his face.

“That one exception being the tragic disappearance of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, who have somehow managed to get lost on their way here. Now I don’t think that they mean lost in the traditional sense, after all who hasn’t lost themself in those eyes as green as a fresh pickled toad?” And George shot a meaningful look at his sister, who sat curled up with Luna near the fire.

“Oi! Don’t look at me! I never wrote that!” Shouted Ginny, offended.

“You didn’t?” Asked George surprised.

“No, I didn’t. I am not the one here who made up a song about Ronald’s keeper qualities, now, am I?”

Right at that moment the door of the pub opened to reveal a slightly flustered and out of breath Harry and Draco, who were very openly holding hands.

“Potter..?” Whispered Draco in Harry’s ear. “Why is everybody staring at us?”

“I don’t know.” Whispered Harry back. “But I have the idea it might be because we’re holding hands.”

Draco gave himself a mental slap in the face. He hated missing the obvious.

“Ha! Gay!” Shouted Seamus, as he held up his own hand to reveal Dean was holding it. His words broke the silence and a storm of buzz went through the students. Ron was gaping at Harry with a flabbergasted look on his face, while Hermione gave him a knowing smile. Harry wasn’t sure what it was exactly that she knew, but he was glad to see her being happy nonetheless.

He had turned it into his personal mission to make as many people happy as possible after the war. Starting by breaking up with Ginny because she and Luna worked way better, followed by his blessing of Ron and Hermione, even if their frequent snogging made him feel left out. Draco had originally not been on his list, but after their quite fun afternoon Harry felt himself willing to add him. Draco might even be able to make Harry himself happy, if Merlin allowed it.

“Classy people you Gryffindors.” Draco straightened his back, he wasn’t going to let people in on how nervous he actually felt, standing here hand in hand with Harry while half the student body stared at them.

“Well! It seems like our last couple has finally decided to bless us with their presence! There’s still a spot free for the two of you near our other pair of fresh lovebirds.” And Lee indicated towards Dean and Seamus.

“We’re not together Jordan. Don’t be absurd.” Draco didn’t sound like he meant it though.

“It’s best to just go with it Malfoy. They won’t let us live it down anyway.” Whispered Harry in his ear. Draco wasn’t sure what he thought of Harry’s face so close to his, but decided now was not the time to figure it out.

Lee and the twins continued their speech while Harry and Draco made their way to Dean and Seamus. “What happened to you?” Asked Harry, pointing at the sling around Seamus’ neck which held his wounded arm.

“Fell of the bed during rough sex?”

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DerpCraft: How Many Dates Does It Take?
  • Galm: You know one of the things I really love about Smarty? It's that you can completely shut him down by talking to him about sex.
  • Chilled: *calls Smarty while he's not streaming, but everyone else is*
  • Tom: Oh my <i>god</i>, Chilled
  • Smarty: *answering the phone* Oh hey, I was just about to call you. I'm escaping work.
  • Chilled: Oh, awesome, cool, I just had a quick question. Uh, we haven't started yet, we're just getting things together. This is more I guess for my own personal thing, so don't talk to the other guys about this, uh-
  • Smarty: I can <i>not</i> hear you, hold on one sec
  • Aphex: *cry-laughing*
  • Chilled: Ok, how was work bro?
  • Galm: He's gonna reveal a bunch of private details
  • Chilled: You there though?
  • Smarty: Yeah, what's up?
  • Chilled: So, serious question, and I need to kinda know- after how many dates you have sex with a woman? Like, is it two? Three?
  • Smarty: ... What?
  • Chilled: Like, I'm just- I'm in three years of dates, like, is it three dates? Did I get the numbers confused? How many-
  • Smarty: Can I just ask you a question? Are you currently on the livestream?
  • Chilled: NO! We haven't started yet- Aphex, being typical Aphex, didn't show up yet. I think we said 5pm-
  • Smarty: Hold on, wait, what?
  • Chilled: So, three dates? Alright, we'll talk about it more afterwards, get back safe buddy.
  • Smarty: ... I can tell you're on the livestream right now
  • Aphex: <i>*wheezing*</i>
  • Chilled: I'm not livestreaming, cross my heart. I am not live streaming.
  • Smarty: ... I just checked <i>Twitter</i>?
  • Chilled: ... Well, maybe <i>they're</i> livestreaming. Smarty, I gotta go something's going on, there's a creeper in my house, bye Smarty-

anonymous asked:

Greatings! Can me talk about our lord and savior, Papyrus?

Papyrus? Oh you mean that goofy skeleton from bundertail well i- *trips* *thousands of screenshots of Papyrus spill from pockets* fuck those aren’t mine i swear i’m just holding them for a friend i- *slips on a pile of naked Papyrus fanarts* fu ck no they’re not mine i never commit such crime i just- *more pictures of Papyrus being fucked fall out as i fall to my knees, desperately trying to pick them up* hang on a sec jU S T you know wha nevermind step inside house my kiddies we still have a whole Papyrus worship service to do come on chop chop time doesn’t wait

Yo can I just talk about the significance of having an Asian captain for just a sec?

As an Asian person living in a western society, I grew up with VERY limited Asian role models. Asian portrayal in media is SO LIMITED and often so stereotypical when done, not even taking into account the number of times we just get whitewashed for the hell of it (Ghost in the Shell, Death Note)

So seeing an Asian female captain holding her own, being respected despite her age, race, gender, and accent? This feels good

Dancing in the kitchen

Pairing: Tyler Hoechlin x reader
Fandom: N/A
Requested: nope, my own
Imagine: Reader works at a small bakery (that the reader opened) and Tyler is the readers boyfriend and he comes in to see her, she’s out back and he goes back and hugs reader from behind and ‘Neverland’ by Zendaya comes on and they dance together


*Y/N POV*
I bobbed my head and sang along with Selena Gomez’s ‘Hands to Myself’ played on the radio as I started on a new batch of Anzac Biscuits, Shortbreads, cupcakes, and the other things that I made for the shop.  I opened a bakery 4 years ago tomorrow, because I wanted to peruse my career in baking, and years later, I’m here serving roughly 200 people per week (and some of them being famous). “Can’t keep my hands to myself no matter how hard I’m trying to I want you all to myself you’re metaphorical gin and juice” I sang and thinking of the past, of Tyler and I, and how we met

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