I'm loving the warm, beautiful weather and all but..
when it gets warmer and everyone else wants to wear less, i become more insecure, cause of my hirutism. i wish it was easy to shave everything off. but this isn’t peach fuzz that we’re talking about. and i hate every bit of it. i hate how i have to put into 4 hrs of shaving and have to put in more effort cause the amount of body hair i have. and its hot, and i can’t hide under a jacket forever. and its like i’m in this battle of shaving and wearing short sleeves, or not and just wearing short sleeves or covering myself. being a Pakistani-Muslim, i’m not even allowed to wear a tank top in the house. and i’m always been so used to wearing jeans all summer long, cause i don’t have a choice, i have to cover myself. and walking around campus, seeing all these girls in shorts, dresses, and bikinis. i want to wear those things but i can’t cause a) i’m too hairy b.) i can shave, but i have too much hair to shave off, its really bad. c) i’m not even allowed to show that much skin anyways.
and i’m so embarrassed about all of this as i’ve always been. and i think my only way out is laser hair removal surgery. cause that can only permanently take it all off. but i’m a broke ass college student. and this whole week, everyday after school, as i sit at the mall, i feel so insecure cause i can’t even enjoy warm weather in just jeans and some t-shirt.