Kaidan and Grief

I have always HC’d Kaidan as being very emotional and feeling things like anger, grief and loss intensely. Not because he’s an angry person, but because he *is* so emotional and he feels things deeply. When he lashed out at Vyrnnus defending Rahna - that was those emotions.

So for me, Kaidan is bitterly emotional after he loses Shepard over Alchera. Angry, despairing, unable at first to move past those horrible feelings. He doesn’t fall into drinking or drug use, but instead loses himselves in despair and functions on autopilot. Kaidan throws himself into his work with a desperate abandon that worries Anderson - it’s clear he doesn’t care if he lives or dies. He accumulates vast sums of credits from danger pay from taking on these missions. He gets new scars, new skills, maybe even a tattoo.

The bleeding wound that is the loss of Shepard never quite heals because what if? What if he’d disobeyed their orders and stayed? What if Joker hadn’t stayed behind? What if Shepard hadn’t gone back for him What if? WHAT IF?

After a time his life becomes more normal and the agony of missing Shepard isn’t quite as keen. So he tries to move on … but he never quite can. There is always a face in the crowd that looks like theirs, or that damned Shepard VI telling him he looks like a varren person, or their face on Memorial posters and Alliance advertising - “Remember Normandy”.

He can’t forget.

He won’t.

He hates it and loves it. The pain becomes something that he clings to desperately, bitterly, ferociously. Because it’s all he has left. The gap Shepard left in his life is one he doesn’t want to fill; he needs to feel something, even if it’s pain.

Originally posted by cactuarkitty

anonymous asked:

I'm sorry to ask but....what's onceler

*puffs on cigarette* onceler?? i haven’t heard that name in years…

it was a dark time…the lorax had just come out….and all eyes were on…the onceler…

people were…obsessed….talented people…you’d see a beautiful work of art…and you’d be like…..wow…but then…there was the slow realization… it was the onceler….

he was everywhere….and then…it got weird…people were shipping him….with himself…multiple himselves… it felt like there was no escape….porn…porn everywhere…sometimes i still see his stupid green top hat….in my nightmares…

[HideKane] Nagachika

Hide knows exactly how to point out his lover out of himselves.

Also available in AO3


Hide decided that he liked Kaneki.

Yes, he decided to do just that. To like Kaneki. Every part of him.

Including this one.

“Heya, Kaneki.”

“Ah, good morning Nagachika!”

This was how he knew that this wasn’t his Kaneki. But he kept his smile and went over to the pantry to take one of the apples Kaneki hadn’t touched. “Mornin’! Where’s Kaneki?” He asked casually. The man smiled and hand over a plate of sunny-side up to Hide. “Asleep. He pulled an all-nighter last night and wouldn’t wake up no matter what I do. I’m Haise, by the way.”

Ah, he was in luck. Hide wouldn’t know what to do if it was Yami or Shiro.

“Oh thanks, Haise-san. Tell Kaneki that I’d be working until late night, will you?”

Haise-san smiled.

“Will do. Have fun at work, Nagachika!”

Keep reading

Thanks to Netflix I am now halfway through my Hawaii Five-0 marathon. 

It is the perfect soothing balm to my destiel burns. 

I have decided my head canon is that Steve and Danny got together in season three. right after Danny stayed over to watch the Notebook with his daughter and he and Steve actually cuddled on the couch together. 

Not sat together, but Steve’s arm around Danny, Danny’s head pillowed on Steve’s bicep, body tucked into his … cuddled. 

I noticed Danny kept turning up at moments that would effectively cockblock Steve and Catherine and I’m thinking, that’s so not accidental. Given what happens in later episodes, I’m thinking that Danny confessed his feelings to Steve after that and that they’ve secretly been doing the frick-frack ever since. 

In these last couple of episodes, they are taking Grace to events together, Danny bringing Steve along on a girl scout trip he was supposed to to chaperone…Steve telling Danny to behave himselves around the models…

Am I the only one who thinks that Solas DEFINITELY WOULD NOT HAVE TOLD THE INQUISITOR (PARTS OF) HIS PLAN if he wouldn’t plan on giving them a chance to proof him wrong and find another way?

Solas is not good at asking for help - he almost never asked for anything, which the Inquisitor remarks at the start of his personal quest. 

But at the end of Trespasser? Think about it …

He could have removed the mark without telling them anything.

He could have just let them die.

He could have chosen to kill them himself.

He did nothing of that. Instead, he took the time to TELL THEM. 

Solas is not stupid. Why endanger his plans like that, if not if he wouldn’t want to give the people of modern Thedas a fighting chance, if not for the Inquisitor to look for and maybe find another way?

Solas sets the Inquisitor up as his adversary on purpose. 

And if you befriended him, and tell him that you want to redeem him, he says that he would treasure the chance of being proven wrong again.

If the Inquisitor truly managed to find a better way, Solas would listen. He would take that option, if it were preferably to his original plan.

I cannot see him actively oppose the Inquisitor in their endeavors. (Well, maybe if the Inquisitor is looking for a way to kill him, but otherwise …?) He would certainly not tolerate the Inquisitor sabotaging his plans and would take counter measures, but trying to actively kill and harm the Inquisitor? No.

He set them up to stop him, either by lethal force or by finding a solution he can’t see.

There is a fair chance that the Inquisitor won’t succeed, sure, but Solas obviously sees the Inquisitor as his best chance to find another, a better way, and he would not sabotage that part of his own plan by trying to get rid off or activaly hinder the Inquistor.