himselves

teenage fever ❖ baekhyun (4)

Baekhyun was so in love, thinking that you still were like this after all you’ve been through, he really thought you were the only one for him.


admin : - velvet
genre: baekhyun! philosophy uni professor au, age gap (if you don’t like, please don’t read), angst, slice of life and fluff + a lot of sexual tension!


(gif not mine, cr to the owner)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3


You took a big breath, your heart rate was quick because of the little run you had to do to be on time, but you finally were there, in front of your Philosophy class for your last lesson of the year. University wasn’t over, but you decided to take three months just to follow Art classes, so you were really going to dump Mr. Byun’s course for your major. You were sad, you always loved Philosophy, but that year Art was more important and you needed to pass it with the highest grade. 

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BTS Reaction S/O is a translator (hyung line)

this ended up being really long, so i’m splitting them. lysm <3

When they were told a new translator, the translator, was finally joining their team, they were relieved (specially Namjoon, knowing he wouldn’t have to keep translating six monkeys alone). Korean, english, spanish, german, french, and even russian. You were known from being a genius. You have worked from EXO to One Direction, always travelling, always ready. And though you never though of joining a permanent group, when BigHit approached with the offer, you just couldn’t keep your inner ARMY away, and before you knew it, the contract has been signed and you were travelling back to Seoul, ready to write a new fucking chapter in your life.
Ready to write someone in.

KIM SEOKJIN

Jin knew he wasn’t the best dancer, singer, rapper. He knew he couldn’t take really good pictures nor make actually funny jokes. He also knew you were the most beautiful human he had ever seen, and that he did not feel as someone up to you. But then, there was one thing he was certain about: he was an awesome chef.

He used your knowledge in languages to make you help him translate recipes. He had a triple price: a new plate to be tasted, a few more words in his vocabulary (though, being honest, he just copied the recipes back in korean and never looked back at the original), and some time alone with you.
It didn’t matter to you, in the end. If there was something you loved even more than travelling and dictionaries, it was food. And Jin’s dishes were the most magical things you have ever tasted.

They say that to conquer a man, you have to conquer his stomach. Lets just say that it works just as fine with you. Before realising it, you found yourself thinking about him at each second. You though of his smile, his gentle touch, his lame jokes, those broad shoulders. The way he always seemed to cook with so much passion, and with some much love when you were with him. So when he made you that small simple dish that you have once mentioned  was your favorite food from your country on your first dinner, you couldn’t help but grab his face and smash your lips together, trying to make him feel as good as he and his food made you feel.

Jin would never be happier. He loved bragging about his genius bae, and you loved bragging about your amazing chef. And though he may never really learn everything you spoke, and yoo might never know how to toast bread without burning it, everything was okay. Your hearts, your mouths, and your tummies had each other, and you knew you didn’t need anything more.

MIN YOONGI

At first he tried to act unnimpressed. Yes, you knew a lot of languages, so what? It was not like you were better than anyone else. And you didn’t think that way, of course, but Min Yoongi was scared of never being enough. It was at that point that he started trying.

You noticed your notebooks, dictionaries, and text books disappeared and reappeared sporadically, with some new scribbles or some lazy post-its on the side. And then, in the middle of an interview, Yoongi would manage to answer a question in a rustic german without letting you say a word. You knew exactly what was happening then, specially when you caught his arrogant smile as he answered confidently. He was challenging, but you would not let him win.

You reached victory a couple nights after, when you caught him on the act of sneaking one of your textbooks and notebooks. Yoongi looked defeated, blushed, and terrified as you pushed him into the room again, closing the door. After staring at him for a minute, you took the book out of his hands, recognizing your Français pour les débutants sample. Cracking a soft smile, you grabbed his hand and sit him on the bed, taking an almost new notebook and starting to teach him a little. And even though you didn’t say a thing, his soft gummy smile, the first one devoted to you, stayed on your mind the whole night.

A month after that, it had became a routine from him to sneak onto your bedroom almost everynight, just to hear you talk and get lost on your voice, soft as velvet, the only drug he would consume again and again, until the day he decided that maybe it would be better to combine it with your lips. He kissed you, in the middle of a spanish session, as your world froze. Head spinning, he tasted like mint bubblegum, just as the way his hair seemed to taste. And even though you couln’t know that, you knew it felt as soft as cotton candy as you buried your fingers in it.

Something knew burned though your skins, as he gently laid you on the bed. A new language tingled on your tongues, and you would learn it together.

JUNG HOSEOK

Languages were his weak point. He might be the golden hyung, but there was nothing shiny about his language skills. He had made a fool of himselve when you asked the guys to repeat some basic sentences, failing on the pronuntiation of almost all of them (he seemed to have a weird conection with russian, the one you actually struggled the most). But even with that small comfort, he knew he would never be your focus, having someone as Namjoon or Jeongguk to talk instead.

Little did he know he was amazing at other kind of languages. You discovered it the night Hoseok had skipped dinner with the crew, too busy practising, and as you saw them too exhausted to live, you gently offered to go get him and feed him something.

The music blasted through your ears even a floor above the studio. The closer you got, you recognized a typo on the rythms-energic, intense. Angry. The door was already open, and Hoseok’s body was drenched in sweat. His muscles were completely noticeable under his damped shirt, and the emotions his movements spelled took your breath away. Nothing Left To Say from Imagine Dragons jumped next on his playlist, his body almost resetting fot the new song. You watched with awe as he moved, jumped, as he fucking felt every single one of the notes. At the end, the room felt silent long enough for him to hear your atonished gasp and turn off the music. With a shy smile, you handed him the sandwich, as he sat infront of you. Slightly blushed, he started eating, thanking you with his eyes as he stuffed his cheeks. You just laughed and joined him, small talk quickly transforming to meaningful conversations, and a short visit becoming the best night of your life.

The day after that, you didn’t wait for someone to ask you, direclty grabbing two bowls of rice and rushing to his practice room. And so you did the next evening, and the next one. And as the weeks kept going, his choices began to change to happier and sweeter tunes, till one night he stopped you and asked you to dance with him. Taking the pizza box out of your hands, he turned on the speaker (the one that, miraculously, was for once turned off), as “I Gotta Feeling” from The Black Eyed Peas filled in the room, making you giggle. His hands took yours, sometimes resting on your hips, shoulders, back. He had his eyes closed and a gentle smile as he soflty guide you, not letting you fall, never losening up his hold. And at some point you choose to close your eyes too, letting the movement fill you. Letting Hoseok kiss you back.

KIM NAMJOON

They had been teasing him the second they found out about the new addition. He couldn’t blame them, though. He was a sappiosexual nerd who already knew that would fall for whoever crossed the door. And also, the fact that you had the brightest smile he had ever seen, contributed to create the biggest crush he would ever get.

He was wrecked as soon has he heard your voice, and he couldn’t help the blushing that happened anytime you stared back. Your voice, soothing and firm, felt like a hot cocoa after a long day, and that was what he had been looking foward.

Surprise hit him when confirming you were not only smart with languages, but also with everything. Almost a book addict, he found himself helping you carry bags full of books at least once a week. And he wanted to get closer, he needed to, but he didn’t know how. Until the day he realised, you knew a lot of languages but not all of them.

When he approached you at lunch with the offer, how could you say now? You had always wanted to learn italian, japanese, chinese, and he always craved getting to speak german, russian, and french. Spanish and english were children games for your restless minds and bodies, and you were up for the challenge. Lessons started inmmediately, almost everyday, at any second you manage to sneak away together. It was almost a competition on who would learn faster.

But in the middle of your healthy fight, you learnt about each other. About how he loved bitter coffee, while you couldn’t live without your chai latte. How he learned better reading, but you rather embrace any sensation. How both of you could solve enigmas in a matter of seconds but still manage to stumble on any surface, always breaking Yoongi’s stuff and sneaking away, giggling as kids. He also learned you loved poetry. And Namjoon liked to write.

You found a small notebook on your pillow a Thursday afternoon. They were recording, so you flipped the object open. As you started reading, your heart sting quietly, each word craving the deepest part of your soul. Nine sweet, short, sincere poems, each one on each language, existed on those pages through his messy handwriting, as the post-it on the bottom, asking if you would like to write some lines. You didn’t wait for the ink to dry, rushing out, notebook firmly held by your hand. Ignoring their looks as you stumbled on the room, walking towards the blushing tall guy, he though he had really fucked up.
That’s until you kissed him, and he knew that was the only answer he needed back.

masterlist

The Pieces

I already posted this on AO3, but I figured I might as toss it on tumblr too. I wrote this at 2 AM with a fever, so take it for what you will.

“Colonel,”


When Dark speaks, it is not with his own voice. It is not with any of his voices. It’s something deep and gravelly from the pit of his stomach.


He is not himself. Or at least, he is none of himselves. He is not Celine, nor Damien, nor his dearest friend. He’s…. he’s not any of these people, and yet he is all of them at the same time.


He is all of them, and so when he looks at the Colonel, laughing nearly hysterically at a joke that only he seems to get, he feels a pull in his gut.


Dark does not know much about himself, or about the rage that boils within him, but he knows that he cares for the Colonel. He is made of only adoration for this man, and seeing him hurt is painful. Celine loves the Colonel purely, and Damien, a much more complex adoration mixed with feelings of betrayal. It all twists into a cocktail of a bittersweet need to make sure that he’s okay, that he isn’t hurting.


So he repeats himself. “Colonel, come here,”


The Colonel looks up and at Dark like he’s seeing him from many rooms away. The laughing dies a slow death, and he walks forwards like he doesn’t have control of his body.


“Celine?” The Colonel asks, looking distinctly confused. Dark wonders if he can feel her spirit coming off of him somehow.


“No, I’m Dark.” And as he says it, Dark feels like it’s just right. Yes, he is not Celine, he is not Damien, he is not even the other soul that resides inside of him. He is Dark. “Celine is dead,”


And that seems to be the wrong thing to say, because almost instantaneously, Colonel’s expression shatters. He falls to his knees, and makes a noise like a wounded animal, only managing a low ”No no no no, Celine,” in his grief.


Dark drops to meet him, and feels the sudden urge to wrap the Colonel in his arms, so he does. “I am not Celine, but she is in me. Damien is here too, and they forgive you, Wil. They forgive you.”


The Colonel shakes in his arms, but his arms come to wrap around Dark, like he’s a drowning man and Dark is the only thing that can keep him afloat. “My Celine, My Damien, My dearest friend, I’ve killed you,” He sobs, wetting the shoulder of Dark’s suit.


“No, my love, my friend. We are still here - I am still here. And I am not leaving you, Colonel, Celine is never leaving you. Damien is never leaving you.” Dark doesn’t know where this tenderness towards the colonel comes from, or why it comes so abundantly, but it seems to soothe the Colonel’s aching heart.


He pulls back to stare at Dark, and in his eyes is something Dark has never seen before. It’s a sort of madness, along with something bordering on obsession. “Promise me. Promise me you’ll never leave me, my Dark, promise me that I will not have to live in a world without you. Promise me you won’t let me destroy you.”


And with that, Dark cups his face, smiling in a way that is far too intimate for two creatures who have only just met each other. “I promise, Wil, I promise I will be by your side to the end of time.”


And that’s a promise that Dark intends to keep, with everything he is.

THE ELLEN SHOW: Chapter 8

The Ellen Show Master List

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“Mom?” You called out after leaning away a little more, she called back right away. You looked up at Shawn with a look of complete disappointment and rolled your eyes in annoyance.

Shawn looked just slightly disappointed but he quickly then shrugged and kissed you on the forehead before detangling from you. Both of you stood away from one another and you reached up and quickly smoothed out your hair and shirt. Shawn didn’t appear to realise his hair was a bit of mess too, so you reached up and gently smoothed it out. His hair was much curlier and full, having not been cut in a while. You liked how it looked.

He smiled as you fixed him before he placed his hand your back as you left the room. You noticed how his hand expanded over almost your entire backside,

You called out to your mother once more as you came out into the living room.

Your Mom was at the front door bringing in bags of groceries. “Hey.” She answered. “What time is your frien..?” He stopped as she looked up and noticed Shawn standing just behind me.

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TALKING  ABOUT  THE  FINAL  PROBLEM

______________________________________________________________

AN EXCERPT FROM THE Q&A AT THE BFI SCREENING ON JANUARY 12th, 2017

Qestion:  What was the main message of this episode:

(X at about 20:22)

Steven:  Suppose it’s that Sherlock finally understands that he is stronger and smarter than Mycroft in a way  And not because he actually is ….

Mark:  Wait … what?

Steven: But not becaues he is actually smarter. He is less smart. But he is …. because his emotions, his connections to other human beings … the wisdome he has gained from the connections he has made in the world make him stronger. He sees that partly because the extreme of Eurus, who has no connections to anything, is just pure brain, not understanding anything about what it is to be human … makes him realize that everything that he has worked towards, everything that he has tried to step away from himselves, tried to deny about himself, is what makes him the strongest one. He isn’t as smart as Eurus, he isn’t as smart as Mycroft, he‘s just always gonna win against them because he is better and stronger. That is him becoming the Sherlock Holmes of Basil Rathbone, of Jeremy Brett. The one we‘re used to. The wise old man of Baker Street. Who is still terrifying, who is still cold but has a heart that you never doubt. That.

.

@gosherlocked @isitandwonder @loveismyrevolution @justshadethings @sarahthecoat @monikakrasnorada @tjlcisthenewsexy @longsnowsmoon5

CHAPTER 8

The Ellen Show Master List

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“Mom?” You called out after leaning away a little more, she called back right away. You looked up at Shawn with a look of complete disappointment and rolled your eyes in annoyance.

Shawn looked just slightly disappointed but he quickly then shrugged and kissed you on the forehead before detangling from you. Both of you stood away from one another and you reached up and quickly smoothed out your hair and shirt. Shawn didn’t appear to realise his hair was a bit of mess too, so you reached up and gently smoothed it out. His hair was much curlier and full, having not been cut in a while. You liked how it looked.

He smiled as you fixed him before he placed his hand your back as you left the room. You noticed how his hand expanded over almost your entire backside,

You called out to your mother once more as you came out into the living room.

Your Mom was at the front door bringing in bags of groceries. “Hey.” She answered. “What time is your frien..?” He stopped as she looked up and noticed Shawn standing just behind me.

“Oh, he’s here!”

Moving closer to your Mom, you introduced Shawn to her. He reached out and shook her hand and called her by her last name. She insisted on calling her by her first name. After the introductions, she brought the bags into the kitchen and began to pull things out.

She began to ask questions about Shawn. Things along the line of how you knew one another, what he was doing in the city. She gave you a look occasionally and you knew she was going to press for more later when Shawn wasn’t present.

“Shit, I forgot the peas.” She said emptying the last bag.

I gave her a look and rolled my eyes. My mother had this extremely bad habit of never getting everything she needed from the store. My whole life when at home was trips to the store to get things for her she had forgotten.

Shawn and I made the trip to Wal-Mart for her. Which I was happy to do this time, as it would kill time before dinner. Shawn and I roamed the store for a while, hand in hand. We ended up in the toy section somehow browsing through all the selection of toys.

“What are you doing?”

“What does it looked like?” I laughed as I pulled out a small bike from the rack.

Shawn smile to you. “Are you serious?”

Your tongue slipped through your teeth as you smile mischievously, as you hopped onto the child’s bike. You placed your foot on the pedal but struggled for the other one.

“You know it would help if you chose an adult one?” He said stepping out of the way as you pushed yourself along.

You glared at him. “I don’t remember asking for your input.”

Shawn chuckled and began to give you more input on how to ride the bike. You pretended to be sassy with him, and he enjoyed it.

“Excuse me. You’re not allowed to play with bikes.” Someone said behind you.

You turned and saw an employee.

“I’m not playing. I’m testing it out.” You said to the employee. He didn’t believe you. “How am I supposed to know if the bike is good or not if I can’t test it out?”

He looked at you and the bike. “You’re buying a blue Elsa bike?”

Without missing a beat you gave the man an insulted look. “Yes. I am.”

You could see Shawn behind the employee covering his mouth trying not to laugh out loud, holding the bag of peas in his arm. It was a struggle seeing Shawn so amused but you managed to continue on.

“I am looking to get one for my niece. I need to know what I am buying here. I mean I’m not sure if the kickstand is sturdy enough to ensure the bike won’t fall over.” You said getting off and putting the bike on the kickstand.

The employee didn’t still believe the story but he changed his tune. “Oh well, alright then.” He turned away before you could say more, and left the aisle like a bat out of hell.

Continuing with the act you pretended to be upset that the employee had been rude and not stayed to help with your search. Your mouth dropped and you placed your hand on your hip.

“Wow. Just wow.” You acted. Shawn was snickering still. “Completely unimpressed with this service Shawn.” You spoke a little louder. “I GUESS I’ll just have to take my business to Canadian Tire.”

You began to walk past Shawn and flipped your hair while stalking down the aisle. “Come on Shawn. Let’s go.”

Shawn followed you, still in stitches. When you reached the end of the aisle you quit the act and smiled to him as he reached you. Your hand was out waiting and he placed his in yours.

“C’mon.” You said pulling him along. “Probably should get home.”

Shawn pulled you in close as your arm wrapped around his waist and you both walked down the aisle. He then kissed the top of your head which maked your heartbeat flicker.

You drove the both you home and it was much darker out now, getting closer to the evening. When you pulled up into the driveway you noticed your dad’s truck in the driveway.

“Oh, dad is home.” You said unbuckling the seat. Shawn turned and gave a nervous look. You playfully gave him a shove. “Oh stop. It’s fine.”

You both walked to the front door and entered inside.

“Did you get them?” Mom called from the kitchen. You gave her a look. “No.” You spoke seriously.

“What?” She said upset, and her head came around the corner a second later, she believed you.

“Yes. Mom, we drove all the way to the store just to get you peas, but didn’t get them.” You said sarcastically.

“Don’t worry we got them.” Shawn said to your Mom politely, as he held them up.

As you pulled off your shoes your Mom came and stood nearby. You noticed your dad’s head behind the couch, his eyes narrowly looking at Shawn. “Hi, Dad.”

His eyes darted away from eyeing up Shawn to look at you. Your dad stood up saying hello to you.

“Dad, this is my friend Shawn. Shawn this is my dad.”

Your dad tried to stand taller and came to Shawn. Shawn almost towered over your father.

Shawn extended his hand which your dad shook firmly.“Nice to meet you, Sir.”

Your dad said nothing about calling him by his first time, like Mom had and you knew he was putting up a front. But for some reason, you really liked seeing Shawn greeting your father by Sir.

Dad looked a little more serious but he remained polite. “Good to meet you as well.”

You looked back and forth between them as Shawn smiled to your dad. Grinning you became amused by how hard your dad was trying to seem intimidating.

“Dad.” He turned to look. “You can stop trying to be scary now.”

Your dad went red. “I am not trying to look scary.” He stammered.

“Could have fooled me.” You said turning one eye to him and chuckling.

“Oh, don’t I love having you home.” Your dad said now relaxing.

You entered into the kitchen following your Mom and Shawn gave the peas to her. Taking a seat on the barstools at the counter Shawn followed you lead and took one for himselve.

“How was work dad?” You asked as he made his way into the kitchen and stood at the end of the island counter.

He took a sip of beer. “Same shit, different day.”

Shawn sat up straight and asked your dad what he did, even though he already knew. Your dad answered his question and Shawn followed up with a few more questions. You watched on pleased.

“So how do you know one another?” My dad asked looking to me.

I grinned and when to answer but Mom chimed in. “They met one another backstage at an award show.”

You looked Shawn with a smirk.

“Ahh.” You father responded. “So what do you do Shawn? Actor as well?”

Shawn shuffled but smiled. “Ah, no a singer Sir.”

You smiled at the sound of Shawn calling your dad Sir. It was so appealing.

Your dad nodded his head but said nothing more.

“Shawn has a show tomorrow night in the city.” You Mom interjected as she began to peel potatoes.

“Really?” You dad said intrigued. He then went on to ask Shawn more about the show, which led your dad to ask about the tour and locations and all about Shaw’s travels. You listened to them as they comfortably talked to one another, but never entered the conversation. Watching them interact with one another, Shawn smiling the whole time, made your heart swell with happiness.

Eventually, their conversation faded out and Shawn excused himself to the washroom. When you were both left with your parents, they both looked to you and began to whisper.

“Are you both together?” Your Mom asked in a whisper as paused from cutting up the potatoes.

You shook your head. “No.” They both looked at you questionably, as you looked between them both. “It’s not like that. Seriously. We’re just friends.” You lied.

You felt the need to lie and insist that you both were just friends. Even though kissing and wanting to put your hands all over your friend’s body wasn’t exactly typical behaviour.

Regardless, you weren’t sure of exactly where you and Shawn stood, so you felt that if you kept on insisting the both of you were just friends it would keep things from being serious.

“Seriously, don’t.” You said as they had just exchanged a look. “Nothing is going on, Shawn is just a friend.”

Your dad turned his head and gave a questionable look. “Who you brought home.”

Your mouth opened to answer, but nothing came out as you had no way to really defend yourself because you knew how things looked. Looking between the both of them you gave a defeated look, trying to plead with them.

“Please, don’t okay? It’s nothing.”  

They looked to one another and said something to one another without speaking. After twenty-three years of marriage, they knew how to do this flawlessly. When they turned back to you, you knew they weren’t going to actively make things uncomfortable.

The bathroom door unlocked in the hall and your Mom turned back to cutting the potatoes.

Turning after a few Moments you warmly grinned to Shawn as he entered back into the kitchen. He walked closer and became engrossed with how great he looked in his black shirt layered with the plaid and him in his socks. He looked so soft and cosy.

Watching him you then realised he walked into the kitchen across from you towards your Mom.

He held his hands together. “Can I help with anything?” He asked.

You sat a little stunned, but then smiled, and you couldn’t even hide it, so you had to bite your lip.

Your Mom also looked a little dismayed. “Oh. Shawn no don’t be silly. I’m fine. You sit back down.”

Shawn lowered his head in a nod. “No, no. I insist. I can cut up something?” He moved his hands around as he continued.  “Anything? You just tell me.” He said giving my Mom his best smile.

You looked onto Shawn, adoring him.

Uncomfortable with having Shawn help, she looked around. She grew up believing that the host should never have a guest do work.

“Well, I guess you could peel the carrots and cut them up?”

Shawn moved towards the carrots on the counter and Mom pulled out the tools he needed.

“Wow. Shawn, thank you.” She then shot me a look. “If only I could get my own daughter to volunteer to help me once in a while.”

My mouth dropped, insulted. As my dad and Shawn began to smile and laugh. You opened your mouth to argue but you only made gawking sounds.

You sank into your chair. “Oh fine! I’ll help.” As you stepped off your seat they all laughed at you.

Mom gave you instructions on what to do, and you followed her directions. The three of you spent the next half an hour preparing the food, while chatting.

Although your parents had seemed to promise to not make things uncomfortable with Shawn they had instead seemed to focus their efforts to tease you in front of Shawn. You pretended to be upset every time they did, secretly you liked it because Shawn seemed to enjoy it. It only made it easier to catch him smiling or hearing him laugh.

As you pushed the dish into the pre-heated oven your Mom asked if Shawn and yourself would like wine. You turned to Shawn and back to her as she poured herself one.

“Yeah sure I’ll have one.” You answered.

“Shawn, if you want I also have beer?” You dad interjected.

“Oh, thanks. But I think I’ll actually go with wine?” He looked to my Mom hesitantly. “If that’s alright?”

She smiled motherly and began to pour another a glass for him. He took it from her and walked around the counter and sat where you had been on at the island. You watch him take a sip of his wine, his hand covering completely around the glass. As he took a sip he looked to you over the rim intensely, his eyes piercing.

Oh god, fuck me.

“Here.” Your Mom interrupted you thoughts, handing you a glass. You thanked her, for the glass of wine, but also subconsciously, for forcing you to look away from Shawn.

Taking the glass you placed it on the counter before jumping up on it to sit. Once settled comfortably you took the glass and took a sip. Shawn was watching you. You tried to look at him like he had done, but you diverted your eyes away to the side, feeling foolish.

You father then interrupted and asked your mother something, and you pretended to listen.

As dinner cooked in the oven the four of you sat and stood in the kitchen chatting. You parents still continued to poke fun at you anytime they could.

Throughout the half hour as you waited, you kept sneaking unnoticed glances at Shawn. He looked so good sitting next to your dad smiling and drinking red wine as he made conversation with both your parents. You weren’t sure if the spike in your body temperature was from the wine or how alluring Shawn looked.  

A few minutes before the timer went off you jumped from the counter and began to pull out dishes from the cupboard to set the dining table.

As you walked into the dining room just behind where Shawn was sitting he jumped up and followed you. He reached out taking the cutlery and a few plates from you. The both of you exchanged a look and smiles as he did.

You dad brought in table protectors for the dish to be placed on the table and a few glasses for water. Which you then filled up as Mom began to pull out the dish from the oven. As you filled the glass near Shawn at the head of the table his hand slipped just above your lower back tenderly.

You looked to him a little stunned that he was making an intimate form of contact with you, while your parents could possibly see him. He was smiling softly, unconcerned. Your eyes darted to your parents but your dad’s back was turned to you and your Mom was preoccupied with the dish.

Feeling comfortable with them being oblivious to his hand touching you secretly, you grinned as you filled the glass with water.

After a few minutes, the four of you took your seats, Shawn directly across from you at the table. You all dished up yourself some food and chatted casually.

“So Shawn, do you watch sports?” Your dad asked as he cut the food on his plate with his fork.

You looked to your dad bewildered. That was all he could come up with for a new topic of conversation?

Shawn finished swallowing his sip of wine, and both of you made eye contact for a Moment before he looked to your father. “Uh, well not really. I haven’t got much time to watch games. I used to, though.”

“Oh yeah, what sports?” Your dad asked before taking a bite of food.

Shawn reached to get food from his plate. “Hockey mostly, a little bit of soccer and football.”

Looking down to your food you moved it around smiling, because you knew exactly what the next question was.

“Oh hockey?” You dad leant in and your smile grew. “Which team you cheer for?”

You began to chuckle but didn’t look up from the table at first.

Everyone noticed you laughing to yourself, and your dad asked why.

“Oh nothing.” You answered. Then you looked up to Shawn and he was looking across the table.

He was the only one who knew why you were laughing. You looked across the table at him and raised one brow to him mischievously. “Go on Shawn, tell him.”

Shawn looked uncomfortable and a little ashamed. He looked down to his wine. “Uh well. I actually cheer for the Leafs.”

You dad with his mouth full looked up. Waiting you all watch your father swallow his food. He said nothing at first but shook his head. “Oh well, that’s unfortunate.”

No one else said anything, but you were still suppressing a smile.

“And Shawn I though I was just starting to like you.” My dad said reaching for his beer as he laughed. We all joined my dad’s laugher until. Shawn looked around at us with a grin, as we laughed at him.

“I hope you gave him a hard time about it already.” Dad then directed to you.

You looked to Shawn with a smirk, locking eyes with him as you spoke. “Oh, trust me I have.”

For the rest of dinner, the butt of jokes was refocused onto you, which you had grown okay with.

You parents filled most of the conversation, talking about work that day. Mom only having one class at the university and dad talked more about a student he was having issues with. Shawn did well with not mentioning of the B.C government or unions, as you had advised.

As you all ate through dinner you couldn’t help but enjoy Shawn interacting with your family. You never knew how much you liked seeing him sitting across from you at the table. Countless dinners you had spent growing up seeing that chair empty. It was nice seeing him fill it, drinking wine, smiling to you and thanking your Mom for dinner. Part of you hated how much you liked it.

After dinner the four of you quickly filled the dishwasher and washed the few pots and pans left. Jokes began to fly between all four of you as the kitchen grew spotless.

Shawn had continued drinking and you noticed his cheeks had gone a little flushed, you liked how healthy and youthful it made him look. He grew a little more relaxed and began to bicker with just your dad, which pleased you.

Shawn, your dad and yourself moved into the living room on the couches as Mom opened her emails. Occasionally she made a noise of frustration and I knew she was dealing with the emails of new semester first-year students. She complained every new semester of the ridiculous emails she got.

When it reached around nine you turned to Shawn. “I should probably take you back.”

Shawn pulled out his phone from his jean pocket and looked for the time. “Oh yeah. I guess we should?”

“You’re driving him back?” Your Mom said sitting next to dad now on the couch as she had left her email an hour or so earlier.

You and Shawn began to stand up from your seats on different sofas. “Yeah. He’s got that show tomorrow.”

“Ah right.” Your Mom replied after a Moment.

Shawn and you both headed for the door and you put your bag together and grabbed your keys.

Both your parents stood up from the couch and came to you both as you began to zip up your jacket.

“Well, thank you Shawn for coming.” You Mom said, she opened her arms and gave him a hug.

He had to lean down to hug her. “Oh thank you so much for having me for dinner.” He said into her shoulder.

She let him go and your dad extended his hand. “Nice to meet you, Shawn.”

“Nice to meet you as well Sir.” Shawn said with a smile.

Your dad corrected Shawn, saying to call him by his first name, which made you grin. You threw your bag over your shoulder and jingled your keys.

“Alright.” You said stepping forward.

Shawn reached for the door and turned it. He looked back to your parents and said goodbye with a smile and thanked them once more before giving a wave of his hand.

Both of them returned the goodbye before Shawn began to slip out the door. You began to exit the door and waved to your parents.

“Will you be home later?” Your Mom asked gently, and being sure not to speak too loud.

You answered very quickly and natural. “Oh yeah.”

She nodded, and you realised this was the answer she had wanted, and you then clued into what she was really asking. Your dad was oblivious.

You said goodbye before walking out and gently closing the door behind you. Shawn was waiting for you at the end of the steps and you then both walked to your car.

“That was really fun.” Shawn said in the darkness of the driveway.

“Yeah? It was wasn’t it.” You said then thinking about how much you had been smiling all evening.

“Yeah. Your dad is kind of hilarious.” Shawn said over the hood of your car.

You grinned as you unlocked the car door, you like hearing that Shawn had a good time. You pressed the door to unlock it and the both of you got inside.

Making small talk about the evening you just had the you both put on your seat belts and you put on the radio to avoid more comments about how old Olga was. As you pulled out of the neighbourhood the conversation faded into the occasional spurt of conversation.

When you reached the highway, it was comfortably quiet. But in the silence, you were able to think, and you began to go back to the what your Mom had implied earlier at the front door.

She was asking if you planned to say the night with Shawn. She knew. She knew the both of you weren’t just friends, but you were in that awkward phase of in-between. As you drove Shawn back to his hotel, you tried to not let her implication enter your mind. Sure you had spent the night with Shawn but that was completely different to what you were now thinking.

As you drove into the heart of the city you grew nervous, even though you knew you shouldn’t.

The drive was much faster the traffic lighter. You pulled into the parkade just a little bit before ten o’clock.

You turned down the volume on the radio to almost silent and then turned to Shawn waiting for conversation and then goodbyes.

“I had a really good day.” Shawn said before looking up to you. This made you grin, feeling like it was a compliment.

“I did too.” You spoke quietly.

There was a Moment of silence before Shawn spoke. “Did you want to come up and hang out for a bit?”

You raised your eyebrows not really expecting Shawn to ask that. But you like it. You took it that he wasn’t sick of you yet, which felt really nice. Because you weren’t sick of him at all, if anything the opposite.

“You don’t have to.” He then added.

You smiled seeing how polite he was being. “No, I’d like too!”

“Okay.” Shawn beamed, as you turned off the car. You pulled your purse from the car and the both of you began to walk through the parkade in silence.

You entered a stairwell and followed Shawn as you went up a flight of stairs and then through a door into the hotel lobby.

“These elevators are cool.” He said led you into one elevator and pressed the twenty-second floor.

Shawn leaned on the wall and you looked around. It didn’t appear to be any different from a standard elevator, you looked to Shawn curiously as the elevator moved upwards.

“When you go down they move so fast that it almost feel like you’re falling. Just almost.” He paused. “You can’t feel it going up, just down.”

You did notice how fast the elevator was moving upwards. In a matter of a few seconds, you had reached his floor. He led the way out and turned to the left, and when down about halfway, before turning to door numbered 2214. He pushed in the card until the little light went green. Pushing the handle down he opened the door.

You both walked into the hotel room. But the room wasn’t the standard room, it had a small living area with some sofa.

Shawn began to unzip his black jacket as you closed the door. He placed it on the side of one of the chairs. You undid yours as well and placed it neatly over the top.

“Wow, you have an incredible view.” You spoke as you noticed the window.

It was a little hard to see out of it from where you were standing because of the reflection of the lights on in the room. You began to slowly make your way across the room to stand near the window. When you reached the large glass wall it was a much better view. His room overlooked the bay, and onto North Vancouver. When  you looked down to the land you could see the area you and Shawn had walked along earlier that day.

“Yeah, it’s pretty nice.” Shawn said, and you saw him moving closer to you in the reflection. He came to stand just behind you.

You both stood a while, as you enjoyed the view for a while.

“What’s the best view you’ve ever had?” You asked Shawn as you turned around to face him.

He pursed his lips deep in thought. “I don’t know.” He answered after a while.

You made your way to the small sectional pulling your legs up underneath yourself as Shawn turned away from the window and came to join you.

“I can’t think of any.” He said flopping onto the couch and placing his arm over the back.

You looked to him calmly and said nothing.

He turned the question on you. “You?”

You looked away thinking, deep in thought your wrinkled your forehead as you eyes flickers around the general area of the coffee table. “Oh, man. That question is hard to answer when it’s turned on you isn’t it?” You said smiling to Shawn before turning away again.

Looking around the room you tried to rack your brain of all the places and hotels you had been.

“You forget them. You know?” You looked to Shawn who was peacefully listening to you before you turned away again. “You see so many of them, they almost just blend together and you forget them. You know when you’re there they are so pretty, but then you leave and they’re gone and you forget.” You took a deep breath and fell silent thinking.

“I have one I remember. Well, kind of.” You paused shaking your head as you tried to pull the images and memories from deep in your thoughts. “I don’t actually remember it that well.” You smiled as you tried to pull the view into your mind.

“It was Montréal. The Sheraton I think. My mMom was presenting a paper there at the University of McGill that she had written, and she took me with her.” The image of your Mom dragging you around the university bubbled forward and you smiled lightly. “Sometimes they would do that, let you bring a spouse, but my Mom brought me instead?”

You continued to focus on something in the room but your mind wasn’t registering what it was as you were so deeply in thought. Still struggling to pull forwards the complete image of the view you had from the hotel room, you continued to focus.
“I don’t even remember it really. It’s all a little foggy. Almost like a dream.” You paused thinking fondly. “All I remember is how many churches there was. You could see them everywhere.” I looked to Shawn conveying my seriousness. “I mean it, they were everywhere.”

Looking away you focused again. “I remember the hotel being high, I want to say forty levels high, and I remember we were very close to the top. So we could see a lot.”

You paused. “I feel like there was water too. There was water, but I can’t remember if it was a lot or a little.” You paused. “No there was water because there were boats? Right? There were boats?” You trailed off.

“Yeah, there was, there was boats. They were big, really big. Like the ones out here in the bay.”

You looked closer onto the couch now. “But my god I just remember the churches, there was so many. And the land.” You brought you hand up to motion the shape of the horizon. “It was flat right in front of us, but in the distance on the right it went up in almost a hill and I could see so far because of it.” You grinned and laughed breathlessly. “Probably why I could see all those damn churches.” You paused thinking and recalling the images. “But everything was most hazy and dusty. It was summer so it was hot, but thinking about it now I’d say it reminds me of what I think Tuscany would look like. The distance was very warm, a lot of yellow and orange colours fading into one another. And you could see all the churches. The white crosses on the top of them stood out in the haze. It was almost traditional.” You shook your head. “If that even makes any sense?”

Still looking to the corner of the cushion Shawn arm was on you realised you had been rambling. You looked up and found Shawn looking at you fondly. “Oh god.” You looked away embarrassed. “I just went on and on about something that I hardly even remember.”

After a Moment you looked to Shawn and apologised.

“Don’t apologise.” He said softly, he waited a Moment before saying more. “It sounds really nice.”

You smile with your lips tight and looked away distantly. “It was nice… From what I remember.”

One last time you thought about the memory before turning back to Shawn. “Anyways!” You said placing your hands together, to signal for a change in topics. He didn’t provide any and neither did you so diverted your eyes around the room.

You saw into the bedroom which was directly across from you through two sliding doors.

Shawn grinned at you before looking away and rubbing his hands on his thighs. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“Uh. Sure.” You paused thinking a Moment and then retracted. “Well actually depends on what you have?”

Shawn jumped up from the sofa. “Well let’s see what we have.” He smiled playfully before walking to the mini bar, you lingered over how he carried himself. He opened the door and crouched down, and began to rummage through. You noticed how tall he still was next to the mini fridge.

Shawn began to list off items. “Well we’ve got mini bottles of Vodka, Whisky, Rum, there is some pop in here. Oh, there is also Scotch.” He continued to poke around.

“Well, I shouldn’t drink.” You answered. “If I do, I probably wouldn’t be able to drive home.”

He looked up from the fridge, his eyes large and bright. “Oh well, you’re more than welcome to stay if you want.”

You were a little-taken aback.

“I mean, totally up to you?” He said casually turning away and quickly adding. “I’ve also water and juice.”

Sitting on the sofa your mind began to panic. You flashed back to your front door less than an hour ago, of you Mom questioning you, and what she was implying. Those ideas flickered through your mind and you felt unsure.

Suddenly you realised Shawn was quietly waiting for you to answer.

“Uh.” You hesitated. What you said next had more implications than of what you just wanted to drink, it was opening the door of potential. Potential you weren’t sure was reciprocated.

“You know what, I’ll just go with a water.”

Shawn seemed unfazed by your answer and he smiled looking into the fridge. When he stood up he closed the door and began to walk to you.

“Catch.” He said as he lifted one of the two bottles of water he had. A Moment later he gently tossed it to you. Catching the cool bottle you opened it up as Shawn did too before sitting on the sofa again. You both took a sip, and you then looked around the room in the silence, waiting for conversation.

You saw guitar cases in the corner by the window. “Those are yours?” You stated more than asked.

Shawn swallowed. “Yeah.” He twisted on the cap of the water bottle. “The one in the black case is my acoustic the other is the electric.”

You waited for him to say more. “I have a couple more, but those are my two main ones.”

He paused. “You want to see them?”

Turning to look at him he was smiling brightly. He looked enthusiastic which was adorable.

“Yeah!” You answered eagerly. Shawn bounced up from the couch again and you sat forward.

He pulled the two cases out and placed them on the floor, and began to unlock and unzip them. He crouched down and carefully pulled out the electric one first and then the acoustic. He held them both with care as he stood up. Holding them by the neck he walked back over to the couch and you sat forward intrigued. He sat down on the couch with both feet on the ground and placed the electric flat on the floor at the side of his feet.

You watch him put the strap of the guitar over his shoulder. Biting your lip you tried to hide how much you liked the sight of him doing so.

“This one.” He said placing his hand across the front. “Is a Taylor 414. I’ve had it forever, probably my favourite for writing songs with.”

You sat close and watch him looking down and across the belly of the guitar. His head turned and he places his fingers over the neck and pressed down on the strings. Slowly his right thumb dragged down and the instruments voice filled the room. You smiled at the sound.

As the sound, he just created began to quickly fade his eyes flickered up to you and he grinned.

Butterflies travelled up into your heart, causing your breath to fall short. All you could do was look at him with a meek smile, unable to move more. His eyes fell again, his head was still turned to the neck of the guitar and you watched his eyelashes contrasting over the top of his cheeks. Without looking away from his face, you could see him adjusting his hand. A few Moments later the guitar began to echo. This time it was a different sound and you quickly picked up that Shawn was finger picking. You grinned at the sound, it was soft and calming.

He continued to pluck for a while longer before he looked up and smiled his hand dropping from the instrument.

“What?” He said with a curious smile.

You raised your brows, not realising you were looking at him in a questionable way.

“Oh, nothing.” The corner of your lip curled into a smile. “I just like the way it sounds.”

Shawn smiled but then looked away to the floor where the other guitar laid. He reached and pulled off the other guitar careful to not hit you with it as you were sitting close. He traded places of the two guitars.

He laid the electric over his thighs, and you caught the face of it. The face was matte black, it looked smooth and rich with the compliments of the metal on the front. When you looked at it, for some reason you thought of Johnny Cash.

“This one.” He said smiling at you as he again places his hand over the front and then looked back to the guitar fondly. “Is a 1959 Gibson.” He turned it up and pulled at the strap. “I don’t usually have this one with me I like the one John Mayer gave me more. But I took this one for some reason yesterday.”

You looked up and away from the guitar as Shawn name dropped John Mayer. “Wait. What?” You gave him a bewildered grin. “John Mayer gave you a guitar?”

He smiled and looked at you, laughing as he spoke. “Yeah, he even signed it too.”

Watching Shawn clearly recalling the memory you smiled. Shawn’s brown eyes slowly came back into focus and then found your eyes, before looking away unhurried.

Reaching for the black strap on the guitar Shawn pulled the strap over, being careful not to accidentally hit you with his elbow. You leant back and then in again when it was safe. He adjusted the guitar and in the same fashion he placed his hand on the neck, and checked his hand placement for his right hand. Your eyes lingered over the tendons in his neck tensing and relaxing as he moved his head back and forth between his two hands.

As he looked to his left hand once more and spoke softly. “It won’t sound as nice because it’s not hooked up to an amp.”

As he finished his sentence he strummed at the strings and you understood what he said. The guitar did make a sound but it was muted, it didn’t fill the room like the other one had. Nevertheless, he continued to strum at it. After a few chords, he looked up his eyes large.
“Actually I think I have a mini amp!” He quickly spoke looking up to a location in the room, his expression was eager. Again he quickly got up and you smiled, he was so excited over his guitars, and you loved it.

He walked over to the side of the wall next to the couch and he pushed the guitar onto his hip. Bending over he moved something around that you couldn’t see. At first, you didn’t notice but it only took Moments for your eyes to focus on how tight his jeans had grown over his backside, you lingered for a Moment too long. Feeling guilty for noticing you looked away just a Moment later.

You heard him rustling with something that sounded like cords. Only when you saw him standing up straight you looked knowing it would be safe to do so.

He was pulling a cord and was holding a small box. He turned around occupied with the cord and came to sit down again. He sat even closer this time pulling the cushion down as he sat and your body fell in a little. He began to shuffle himself and the guitar. He turned on the amp, and it hummed to life. Adjusting the guitar he stuck the cord into the bottom and then into the amp to connect them. After arranging it he turned a nob on the guitar and there was a small noise that came from the amp. You grinned at the warm sound.

Shawn plucked at one string and the box echoed a warm and deep hum. Looking up Shawn smiled at the sound and you did too as the sound vibrated through your bodies.

His eyes looked down and you watch his tender face watching his hand move. The vibration came again once, and he quickly adjusted something on the guitar.

You felt entranced watching him work. He strummed once and then adjusted again and then began to pick at the guitar. The sound that came from the amp was unreal. It wasn’t the first time you had ever heard a guitar, obviously, but it felt different. The sound was sombre, but it the vibrations from the strings was calming.

Watching Shawn you slowly gazed back and forth between his face and his hands on the guitar. His hand calmly slid up and down a few inches, his fingers moving and the tendons in his hand poking out and then disappearing as he did. His large arm looked soft as it was relaxed at his side. The sight was engaging.

Moving up his arm and to his face, you saw his expression relaxed and peaceful as he played. His eyelashes flickering ever so often as he blinked. He was consumed with the movements his hands created, and you were consumed with him as he did. Shawn was consuming, he looked like a man, but had the heart and passion of a young boy.

Slowly the last puck faded. His smile grew larger as the sound got smaller. His eyes were on you, seeking for a reply.

A calm and gentle smile crossed your lips. “More.” You whispered, in a velvety tone.

Shawn’s brown eyes grew warm and he blinked a few more times before looking back down to his hand. The peaceful sound returned and you watched.

As you listened, the smile on your lips softly faded away as you became absorbed with Shawn. He played for a while, it wasn’t a song or a consistent melody, but it was beautiful.

Watching you began to loose all your senses. Slowly with every puck, vibration and change of his hand, your senses began to fade and disconnect with yourself. Everything began to focus on Shawn. Your eyes watch him. Ears listened. Skin felt his warmth in the distance between you both.

Then he began to hum. The sound shocked your ears but washed your body with a sense of comfort. You mouth twitched to smile but was unable to focus enough to fulfil the expression.

His voice in just a hum was beautiful. It pulled you in, it was alluring. A melody grew as Shawn’s humming and the guitar synced together. As you watch on, you saw him falling into a world. A place you could not enter, but only watch.

Although watching Shawn was one of the most contenting things you had ever experience, you felt a few feeling grow. It started in your chest and dispersed, it almost felt like sadness, but it wasn’t. Because how could you be sad watching him. It was powerful and deep, making you feel parts of your lungs and chest you had never knew were open to fill. You didn’t take the time to focus on it, as you still were so enraptured with Shawn and the sound in the room. But the feeling was heavy.

The tune changed a little and it became a little more twangy as Shawn adjusted his playing. You listened to the change and focused on how appealing it was. Shawn played the adjusted melody a few more times when his humming turned into singing. He wasn’t saying words but his voice was open. He sang the notes along with the music, his voice soft and familiar. You smiled this time unable to help yourself. All you wanted to do was rest your head on him and just listen for as long as you could.

You could listen to him all day like this.

A little while later he began to smile and slowly the guitar faded out. It felt too soon.

He gave one more pluck and looked up. His eyes looked up, they were warm around the edges and dark in the middle.

The edge of your lip curled as you continued to look at him, eyes locked. Your heart beat caught your attention. As he looked at you this way it made you nervous, your heart fluttered like the wing of a hummingbird, and just as quickly as hummingbird it was gone.

You looked away nervously in the general direction of his hand on the guitar. You took a deep breath and expanded your chest cavity. “I really liked this one.” You spoke softly.

Shawn’s hand let go of the guitar and rested on his leg. You didn’t look up at first, but the air grew with tension forcing you to look up to Shawn. He was waiting, and watching. Him looking to you make you catch your breath, again.

Heart was pounding, the air thick and his look was intense. You waited for him to say something, anything. Because you had no words.

He didn’t, and you felt your face grow flushed.

Then his body leant forward and you froze. His face came close to yours, and your eyes lowered. But you didn’t move closer or farther, you just couldn’t. His breath lingered on your lips. He didn’t reach up to touch you or pull you closer, but he waited.

He waited for you. The tension between the both of you felt heavy, too heavy to lean forward to close the gap.

Feeling a new cloud of his hot breath on you, you realised you weren’t breathing. You lips parted and you breathed quickly to then slowly exhaled. As you did your body released its tension.  Lips still parted you inhaled and then slowly closed the space between the both of your lips.

He was soft, gentle. It was one kiss first, long and sweet. His lips parted on yours, his breath warming you. His forehead rested on yours for a tender Moment. The both of you eyes closed waited a Moment before you reached out and touched his chest. The touch made the both of your lips reconnect, it was again long but it was followed my sweeter hot kisses. As you kissed, his hand touch at your knee closest to him, and it slowly trailed up to the middle of your thigh. His hand on you warmed your core.

You lips opened and allowed him to enter a little more. He didn’t take advantage of this and kept his kiss simple. He knew how to kiss this way properly, and it was thrilling.

His hand on your thigh disappeared but then came to your face, he slowly guided you away from his lips. Your lips parted with a sound as they came apart. He pulled away still looking to you. You hadn’t wanted to stop now that you had started and felt disappointed.

But you noticed how Shawn was looking at you intensely and you realised this wasn’t the end.

<< Previous Chapter | Next Chapter >>

anonymous asked:

"I read your diary" Jimin :))

❥ jimin, ‘i read your diary’, he 100% seems like the type to holy shit wow, slightly nsfw

you’ve seen his look before. it’s suggestive; it’s a way of park freakin’ jimin alerting you to the fact that he know something which you do not. well, to some likeness, because the last time you’d come home to him sitting on your bed smirking with like a maniac he had found your collection of fifty shades of grey stowed away (because why read poorly written novels when you have tumblr?)

 and lets put it realistically – that wasn’t exactly something you didn’t know about. you knew that you had that collection of books and it did bring a heavy feeling to your heart because you should have thrown them out. 

 ‘baby,’ jimin calls tormentingly. he’s watching you from the same position on your bed with wide eyes that are meant to make you fear him like usual. when you freeze dead on the spot, he gives you a half smirk and adjusts his shoulders to make it very clear he was hiding something behind his back. ‘so i was cleaning today and found a few things…’

 you raise your eyebrow and hum. ‘well, it’s a first i guess. why were you cleaning?’

 ‘because i felt productive,’ jimin tells you. he seems a little frustrated that you easily brush away his remarks to get your attention since it’s part of his personality to crave the attention of those around him. 

 ‘yeah, but why? you never clean? did jin help?

 jimin almost scowls (he can never quite do it because he’s too pretty and perfect to do it to the best of his ability) at your words. ‘why is that the issue? no, jin didn’t come over! i wanted to help you out so started cleaning your room and i found something!’

 you could probably play around with him for ages since you never fully went out to him and said that yes, you knew he was trying to make you pay attention to whatever he needed to show you. but, seeing as he was pouting now and that was pretty hard to resist, you smile and play along anyway. 

 ‘what did you find, jimin?’

 ‘oh, nothing really, just this really cool book that caught my attention under some folders under your bed,’ jimin says. he giggles a little, seeing how you’ve just frowned at his words because they really don’t make any sense to you. ‘here, would you like to see? i read it too!’

 there’s still confusion clouding your mind from all of this, especially when jimin pulls out a pretty plain book that you wouldn’t have really recognised compared to others. ‘uh… jimin, i don’t quite understand what you’re getting at?’

 ‘i read your diary! the one where you say how much you love me in and how you say very clearly that although he might be crazy, i could see a life with him in the page for our year anniversary, and how you write that when jimin sleeps he has conversations with himselves about i don’t know what. by the way, they’re about you most of the time.’

 you could have really expected that. ‘my diary?’

 ‘yes. there was also a very important page where you described something in very close detail.’

 ‘there was?’ you ask. your mind really does go blank until you remember a very specific part that you wish you would have ripped out but it seems you were too late. jimin has beaten you to it. ‘what part? i only really wrote my thoughts down.’

 jimin gives that smirk again. another look you know all too well. ‘oh, you know. just that part about what you imagine it would be like if i was to have you sat on my thigh with nothing but one of my shirts on. wanna try it out for real, babe?’

Kaidan and Grief

I have always HC’d Kaidan as being very emotional and feeling things like anger, grief and loss intensely. Not because he’s an angry person, but because he *is* so emotional and he feels things deeply. When he lashed out at Vyrnnus defending Rahna - that was those emotions.

So for me, Kaidan is bitterly emotional after he loses Shepard over Alchera. Angry, despairing, unable at first to move past those horrible feelings. He doesn’t fall into drinking or drug use, but instead loses himselves in despair and functions on autopilot. Kaidan throws himself into his work with a desperate abandon that worries Anderson - it’s clear he doesn’t care if he lives or dies. He accumulates vast sums of credits from danger pay from taking on these missions. He gets new scars, new skills, maybe even a tattoo.

The bleeding wound that is the loss of Shepard never quite heals because what if? What if he’d disobeyed their orders and stayed? What if Joker hadn’t stayed behind? What if Shepard hadn’t gone back for him What if? WHAT IF?

After a time his life becomes more normal and the agony of missing Shepard isn’t quite as keen. So he tries to move on … but he never quite can. There is always a face in the crowd that looks like theirs, or that damned Shepard VI telling him he looks like a varren person, or their face on Memorial posters and Alliance advertising - “Remember Normandy”.

He can’t forget.

He won’t.

He hates it and loves it. The pain becomes something that he clings to desperately, bitterly, ferociously. Because it’s all he has left. The gap Shepard left in his life is one he doesn’t want to fill; he needs to feel something, even if it’s pain.

Originally posted by cactuarkitty

zebraslovescupcakestoo  asked:

I'm sorry if I asked more about Felix but I'm curious, Is there any chance he's getting like a friend or really good allies with him? apart Kitty Kat, Inky and Winky. Like say >Pink panther, Tom & Jerry, or maybe even Mickey and Oswald.

Marini: Yeah he definitely will but was thinking after a comic chapter about him like, each character besides bendy such as Boris, Alice, Henry and Felix will undergo hardships per chapter about each individual with a moral value from their lives.

So is like Felix will learn that he can’t work alone facing Bendy and his gang. He works alone alot due to death of his father and don’t want his family in jeopardy.(Ya know story like lego batman movie)

Unlike Bendy needs to learn he’s in capable of handling himselves and not so relying on Boris to protect him 24-7(despite Boris want to). There will be a time where the enemy gets the upperhand which leads Bendy and Boris got separate with each other.

anonymous asked:

Your blue vs red comic has so much potential like I love it so much. Like Anti-Caboose bursts one of Caboose's friends and caboose actually gets really mad at him. Ahhhh I love it so much

Thank you! 

If that happens I can imagine Caboose* being all surprised about it! Caboose* is really narcissistic and loves himselves so be apologizes to Caboose.

(more Blue vs Red AU)

hey i have a question

using they/them pronouns for a nb person— would the herself/himself equivalent be themself or themselves? i feel like it’s the former because the latter implies multiple people (singular they/them exists, but i feel like saying “selves” implies the reference of several people) like for the same reason that saying himselves or herselves feels wrong (when not talking about or referencing a system ofc) i feel like it’s wrong to join a singular “them” with a plural “selves” when not referencing more than one individual. but i’m curious and i don’t really know any nb people irl so if ur nb and u prefer a type of language i really just want to understand everything from a grammatical point of view!! if you have the spoons to, please lmk!! i want to be as informed as possible so i can be as cognizant and respectful as possible!!!

Entry #17: Stranger in a Foreign Land

Red hadn’t had much luck lately. He was heading down the road, not really knowing where he was going. What did she mean that it wasn’t working out? Maybe the blacksmith had something to offer her that he didn’t, something stable, well respected. But he had prospects too. Good prospects. If only he could figure out what they were exactly.

So here he was in the Lavender Beds. Two years was a long time after all and such an upheaval seemed to warrant doing something new. Never having been to the Shroud before, this seemed like a good place to find himself. Not being particularly fond of the himselves that he’d found elsewhere.

The sun cast long shadows along the road and lamps were being lit in the buildings around him. It was then he spotted a particularly well-lit building. It looked like an inn. Not having thought too far ahead, it dawned on him that he hadn’t even considered where he was going to sleep. The verge did seem soft, but the cool weather didn’t make that too appealing.

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On this day in Doctor Who history - 16th November

Broadcasting history:

1963 - The first ever trailer for Doctor Who was broadcast on BBC1.

1968 - The Invasion (Episode Three)

The Doctor and Jamie are taken prisoner by Tobias Vaughn who denies abducting Zoe and Isobel. The Doctor suspects that there may be an even greater threat behind Vaughn.

1987 - Delta and the Bannermen (Part Three)

As Billy and Ray do what they can to help save Delta and the baby, the Doctor and Goronwy the beekeeper face Gavrok and his Bannermen one last time.

1988 - The Happiness Patrol (Part Three)

As the Doctor leads the Pipe People towards reclaiming their world, Helen A faces betrayal from those closest to her and the Kandyman comes to a sticky end.

2007 - Time Crash

The time continuum is in potential peril as two incarnations of the Doctor meet himselves in the 2007 mini-sode ‘Time Crash’.

2010 - Goodbye, Sarah Jane Smith (Part Two)

Clyde’s suspicions about Ruby wind him up trapped in outer space. Luke arrives home to investigate his mum’s disappearance.

Personal history:

Torchwood star Alexa Havins was born on this day in 1980.

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Children in Need Week

I Am He; And He Is Me

The time continuum is in potential peril as two incarnations of the Doctor meet himselves in the 2007 mini-sode ‘Time Crash’.

Fixfic: Rogueknight of Timeheart (1/2? IDEK it depends)

Written in the past few hours on my phone with no editing or second-guessing or critical thinking, please be kind.

Rogueknight of Timeheart

==> BE DAVEPETA

The juju comes out, and starts to get – gravitational, and suddenly you understand why you needed to be here. You thought it was to fight Lord English, you couldn’t understand why you couldn’t defeat him, but you get it now.

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[HideKane] Nagachika

Hide knows exactly how to point out his lover out of himselves.

Also available in AO3


i.

Hide decided that he liked Kaneki.

Yes, he decided to do just that. To like Kaneki. Every part of him.

Including this one.

“Heya, Kaneki.”

“Ah, good morning Nagachika!”

This was how he knew that this wasn’t his Kaneki. But he kept his smile and went over to the pantry to take one of the apples Kaneki hadn’t touched. “Mornin’! Where’s Kaneki?” He asked casually. The man smiled and hand over a plate of sunny-side up to Hide. “Asleep. He pulled an all-nighter last night and wouldn’t wake up no matter what I do. I’m Haise, by the way.”

Ah, he was in luck. Hide wouldn’t know what to do if it was Yami or Shiro.

“Oh thanks, Haise-san. Tell Kaneki that I’d be working until late night, will you?”

Haise-san smiled.

“Will do. Have fun at work, Nagachika!”

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